Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to Janet Evanovich. I am not making any money from this. Mistakes are mine.
Even the Pup is an Unmentionable by Debra8652
Chapter 17
POV will switch between Ranger, Remy, and Ram.
Ranger's POV
Santos has a few days off so Ram is taking point to plan the delivery of data we were hired to recover that several agencies are interested in - TPD, ATF, Homeland Security, DEA, and the FBI. Rangeman is being well paid for this job and Manny will be getting a bonus for posing as a homeless man, which allowed him the necessary cover to access a supposedly empty warehouse and copy data from a laptop onto a flash drive. At the very least, the illegal operation being run from the warehouse includes drugs, weapons, gambling, and prostitution.
Steph made a convincing argument that her Merry Men would be too obvious to deliver the flash drive to TPD Chief Juniak, that TPD officers would be at risk if they retrieved it from the Rangeman Building, and that an armored vehicle would tip off anyone wanting to prevent delivery of the data. In some situations, uniforms and a commanding presence can draw unwanted attention when you're trying to fly under the radar. Chief Juniak will wait to hear from me as to the plan to deliver the flash drive.
Steph, Ram, and Remy took the elevator to the second floor where we keep anything we need to go undercover - uniforms for utility workers, swimming pool cleaning services, parks and recreation officers, pizza delivery, religious missionaries, even Halloween costumes. Steph and Ram work well together. Many times the intel she uncovers in her searches is the foundation for ops planning. It will test my blank face to see what they come up with.
Remy's POV
I am helping Mom and Ram with Ops planning - Santos who? We are in a huge closet that has all kinds of uniforms, costumes, footwear, hats - everything you need to become someone else. Nothing was appealing to them until Mom saw a clown costume, big honkin' red shoes included. She caught Ram's eye and they both laughed. Mom held up the costume in front of her and Ram took a photo and sent it to Mom's Man, Tank, and Bobby, who were still meeting on fifth floor. I would love to have seen their reactions! Mom found the rest of the stuff she needed - a mylar balloon and pitchpipe! We headed back to the conference room on the elevator. Ram and Mom had it all planned out by the time we reached fifth floor. Tank and Bobby were grinning and Mom's Man looked as if he was passing a kidney stone. I think he's regretting that ops planning is by a majority rules vote now!
Ram's POV
Steph and I had finalized the details by the time we entered the conference room. She and Hal would be wearing Kevlar vests under their disguises. I could tell by Tank's and Bobby's faces that we had the majority of votes needed to make this happen. Steph will dress in the clown outfit (no FMPs this time), Ella will prepare a cookie gift basket - complete with a Happy Birthday balloon - for Chief Juniak, Hal will wear a uniform shirt and drive the delivery van, and Hector will create a sign to go on the non-descript Rangeman white panel van that is parked with our other undercover vehicles. I will grab our other snipers, Binkie and Brett, and the three of us will be in the back of the van with an arsenal at our disposal. Ranger will probably want Bobby to be close by.
An hour later, Steph had her makeup and costume on and we were ready to head out as soon as she got off the elevator. Warning - never try to take the stairs if you're wearing clown shoes. Hal was in his delivery uniform, Ella made a beautiful cookie basket, Hector had a sign on the van, and three snipers were in place.
The only thing we hadn't considered was the large hoop around the hips in the clown costume that didn't allow Steph to sit down without falling over backwards. The flash drive was secured in one pocket of her costume. Hal turned as red as Steph's clown shoes as he ended up picking her up and having her lie as flat as possible on the van's back seat, while making sure the hoop didn't flip up and dislodge her red clown nose. Ranger called Chief Juniak and told him to be on the TPD first floor in ten minutes and to be prepared for a surprise happy birthday delivery. He got a puzzled 10-4 from Juniak.
Hal pulled up in front of the building in the "Balloons, Cookies and More" van and pulled Steph off the backseat by her armpits. She grabbed the gift basket and she and Hal went through the front door. Hal was her bodyguard, disguised as the delivery guy who takes pictures of the happy event with a disposable camera that's left with the honoree. Steph said the look on the Chief's face was priceless. She had the pitchpipe in her other pocket and sang "Happy Birthday" to him before asking him to come to the front of the lobby and directing him to the side she wanted for a picture with her and the basket. With her bulky outfit, she was able to get close to the Chief and slip the flash drive into his pants pocket with a gentle pat. Mission accomplished. Hal lifted her onto the backseat again and we headed back to base.
By the time we got back, Ranger was already on his cell phone with the Chief, although he held it away from his ear. He wasn't on speaker but we could still hear the Chief, at least I caught "Manoso, who planned that op - are you insane?" to which Ranger replied "There are rumors to that effect, but I can neither confirm nor deny them" - that Steph and I planned it, she and Hal were both wearing Kevlar, and there were three armed snipers in the back of the van and Bobby was a block away. And we could clearly tell that the Chief was munching on his birthday cookies even though it's not close to his birthday. Manny and Hal will get bonuses and Steph will be rewarded with a more stylish pair of shoes (or three) to help wipe the image of red clown shoes out of Ranger's brain. I'm hoping that Ella has more of those cookies left for the rest of us.