Winter's Echo
Chapter Two - Discovering Demons and Others
Elsa realized she had been worried for nothing after she spent the next hour or so regaling Honeymaren and Ryder with how she had spent the past day and a half. Ryder had a sweet, easy going personality that made it impossible not to like him. It didn't hurt that he reminded her greatly of Kristoff, who she missed more than she thought she would. She felt the beginnings of a protective, older sisterly type of affection toward the bubbly young man and smiled to herself - maybe she wouldn't feel so disconnected from her family out here after all. Then there was Honeymaren.
Being around Honeymaren was as easy as breathing for Elsa for reasons she couldn't quite place. Something about the Northuldran soothed the skittish queen, the way a calm hand settled a high strung horse. Elsa couldn't help but admire how the brunette seemed to exist so easily in her own skin, a skill the blonde doubted she would ever come close to mastering. The woman was so very sure of herself and her place in life, graciously accepting and inviting change as it came. Even the completely unexpected arrival of the magical queen, whose powers had shaken even the brave, magic-versed Arendellian soldiers had not put Honeymaren out. She had, instead, acted as a human shield for her younger brother during Olaf's entrance, the queen had noticed. She was also the first of the Northuldra to willingly approach the magical woman of her own volition in order to caution their party about the movements of the earth giants.
She peeked at Honeymaren from the corner of her eye as she laughed at her younger brother's antics. Ryder had been telling the two women about he and Kristoff preparing the mountain man's proposal to Elsa's sister. At the moment, he was mimicking Yelena's response to the scene she had walked in on and Honeymaren was beside herself as she envisioned the elder Northuldran's face. Elsa herself couldn't help but laugh along with the siblings at the situation, daintily covering her mouth with her hand to hide her giggles. Honeymaren raised a delicate eyebrow in amusement at the curious habit, having seen it before on the night she first spent with the reserved queen upon her arrival at the encampment. The Northuldran found it a curious thing, to hide one's joy away from the world; just one of the infinite things she found fascinating about the winter spirit.
Honeymaren reached up and grasped Elsa's wrist, gently tugging her pale hand away from its jealous guarding of her smile before slipping her hand in the queen's, holding it gently. "Come on," the she said with a smile. "It's getting dark. Let me show you where you will be staying." Before Elsa could answer, Honeymaren bid her brother farewell and began to lead her across the clearing. Elsa smiled once more at Ryder as he waved goodbye before walking in the opposite direction toward where his precious reindeer were bedding down for the night alongside the other Northuldran herders.
Honeymaren slowed her pace to ensure she wasn't dragging the monarch, though she didn't release her hand. Elsa found she didn't mind the contact as much as she thought she would have, considering her aversion to touch by all but her fiery sister. She was surprised to also find that, not only did she not mind it, she actually quite welcomed the warmth of the brunette's touch. The reserved queen blushed lightly at the realization, though she wasn't sure why the act of holding the Northuldran's hand seemed so...intimate. Her pondering was interrupted in its infancy when said woman began to speak.
"I really hope you'll be happy here, Elsa," Honeymaren said earnestly. "We are truly honored that you decided to stay with us." Elsa smiled politely, dropping her gaze the ground as they walked. "I'm thankful for the invitation," she replied honestly. "I'll try not to be a burden to you or your people." Honeymaren entwined their fingers and gave the blonde's hand a gentle squeeze, inclining her head toward the queen to catch bashful blue eyes. "We are your people, Elsa. You and your sister are half Northuldra, after all. Even if you weren't, you are the fifth spirit - you belong here more than any of us do," she reminded her.
Elsa blinked at the Northuldran in surprise. She hadn't thought about it like that and the truth of it brought her comfort. She smiled gratefully at Honeymaren, who returned it warmly before reaching out to affectionately brush a stray lock of hair from Elsa's face as though it were the most natural thing in the world. Red bloomed across the queen's face, unused to such a lack of boundaries, but Honeymaren simply smiled wider. "Come on, we're almost there," she said excitedly and picked up their pace slightly to lead Elsa once more. The frazzled woman was thankful for this - despite the innocence of the moment, her mind wasn't capable of much more than being led like obedient livestock after what had just happened.
After a few more yards, Honeymaren brought them to a stop in front of what was clearly a freshly constructed lavvo, finally releasing the other woman's hand. The queen chose not to dwell on the sudden, peculiar feeling of loss, instead looking up at the bark-lined structure she had been led to. Elsa looked at the brunette in mild disbelief. "This...this was made for me? I have my own?" Honeymaren laughed lightly at the blonde's reaction. "Of course, Elsa. You didn't think we would let the fabled fifth spirit sleep on a pile of leaves, did you?"
Elsa took in the craftsmanship of the structure. Though not the largest by any means, it appeared to be a roomier version of a one person dwelling. She peered inside the abode's opening, surprised to see a fur-lined bedroll that sat atop a freshly constructed bed frame. She also spied a thick ring of wood that had been whittled into a type of chair next to a bucket of fresh water with a piece of cloth draped over the side for washing. In the center of the lavvo was a small, stone ringed fire positioned directly under the opening at the top of the structure so that the smoke could escape. Elsa wrung her hands anxiously in front of her. It was clear that a lot of work had gone into making this special for her and, despite her enormous gratitude, she couldn't help the familiar, uncomfortable feeling that being catered to gave her. Though she fought to ignore it, discomfort crept throughout her mind like a choking vine.
Honeymaren easily picked up on the spirit's nervousness and placed a hand gently on her shoulder. "What's wrong, Elsa?" Crystalline blue eyes turned to meet doe brown hesitantly. Normally, Elsa would have cursed herself for the social faux pas and hidden away her unease, but the genuine concern Honeymaren regarded her with once again made it all too easy to trust the brunette with her truth. "I'm so grateful, I truly am. I just..." the she trailed off, looking back up at the dwelling as she searched for the words. "I don't want to be...catered to," she tried to explain.
She turned toward Honeymaren, but her gaze dropped to the ground as she continued to wring her hands. The brunette's eyes flickered from Elsa's face to the nervous habit and back, logging the information away in her mind as the queen tried to vocalize what was clearly a complicated emotion. She was noticing more and more curious little anxious habits like that. Honeymaren reached out slowly to take both of Elsa's hands in her own to cease their nervous fidgeting, causing the spirit's eyes to flick upwards to meet her gaze. She simply gave the woman's cool hands a reassuring squeeze and waited, allowing the queen as much time as she needed to express herself. Elsa gave a small laugh, smiling gratefully at the disarming woman. The Northuldran's understanding brought the relief she needed to communicate her worries.
"I don't want to be other, Honeymaren," the blonde finally admitted, her gaze dropping to the ground once more. "Even at the palace, the idea of...of being tended to, waited on, provided for...I avoided it almost everywhere I could. I hate feeling like I am a burden. Just because I have powers or was borne of a particular family doesn't mean I deserve anything more than anyone else in this world." Honeymaren stared at the woman before her in quiet awe and admiration. Elsa should have, by all rights and definitions, been the embodiment of privilege; she was beautiful, intelligent, and a queen turned goddess to boot. Despite this, she felt undeserving of the gift of what must be the simplest of roofs over her head to someone like her. The surprising holistic prosperity of Arendelle, a nation she had once thought to be brimming with self-centered, untrustworthy people suddenly made sense as she regarded the selfless queen before her.
"Who knew such a beautiful soul could exist in the world beyond this forest," Honeymaren commented quietly, more to herself than to the monarch. Elsa looked up in confusion at the Northuldran, puzzled at her words. Honeymaren simply smiled at her and reached up to affectionately tuck white-gold locks behind her ear, lightly brushing a pink-tinged cheek with her thumb before grasping her hands again. "You are not other, sweet spirit," she reassured. "You are family, now. Of course we will teach you our ways, that was never a question - but you must first give yourself the chance and the time to learn them," she chided gently. "Besides, just your presence here helps us in ways beyond what we are capable of," she added.
Elsa's brow furrowed questioningly. "What do you mean?" she asked curiously. Honeymaren smiled widely, eager to tell the monarch how she had already been benefitting the tribe, even when she was off exploring. "Didn't you notice how quickly all the fires were lit in the camp when night began to fall? Since you and Anna freed the forest, the spirits have once more blessed us with their generous gifts as they had many years ago. Fires light themselves and water buckets fill on their own; stones build us bridges and breezes clear our camp of debris. This is your doing, Elsa," she explained. "These gifts are because you are here."
Elsa looked around the encampment, realizing the truth of Honeymaren's words when a cooking fire blazed to life on its own as a large pot was placed on a hook over an unlit fire pit. The Northuldran smiled tenderly as she watched Elsa take in this new information. "You being part of us is our greatest gift, Elsa. Try to believe that," she said quietly as Elsa turned to meet her gaze. Before the wintery spirit could respond, Honeymaren flashed her a quick, bright smile. "Now, try to get some sleep," she urged, then gestured to the larger lavvo they had been standing in front of when they were talking to Ryder."I'll be there if you need absolutely anything." The brunette made a face and raised a challenging eyebrow at the queen, playfully wagging a finger at her in warning. "I warn you, I will be quite cross with you if I find you were in need and didn't inform me."
Elsa gave a small giggle at the teasing threat, hiding her smile with her hand. Honeymaren made a small 'hm' noise at the gesture. "So curious," she muttered under her breath before shaking her head slightly. Honeymaren pressed a kiss to her fingertips before lightly touching them to the slightly taller woman's cool forehead. "May the stars guide you, spirit." Elsa first blinked at the affectionate, almost motherly gesture, then again at her parting words as the tan woman turned to leave. "Wait, what?"
Honeymaren turned back to her, confusion plain on her pretty features before lighting with understanding and she smiled. "It's how we say goodnight to people we care about. 'May the stars guide you into the arms of a dream, one where all is well and the spirits are seen'," she rhymed. Elsa smiled at the sweet nighttime well-wish. "That's a lot prettier than 'sweet dreams'," she joked. Honeymaren grinned. "Well, I'm hoping a beautiful phrase will give a beautiful woman a beautiful dream," she said, winking at the queen before turning again and walking away, leaving the blonde blushing hotly in front of her new abode. Despite herself, Elsa bit her lower lip gently in a failed attempt to slow the smile that began to grow on her now consistently rosy features. As she turned and entered her lavvo, she couldn't help but think she was going to really like it in the enchanted forest.
Her optimism left her several hours later.
Elsa was miserable. It was well into the unholy hours of the evening and the blonde had yet to sleep. Her racing thoughts refused to quiet themselves. She was on edge, she was homesick, she missed her sister.
She was lonely.
And that terrified her.
Even to the naturally shy, introverted woman, thirteen years of isolation had been an absolute curse on her mind, body, and soul - Anna's as well. Nearly every night for several months after their reunion, the sisters had found themselves in one or the other's room, unwilling to be alone when they weren't being forced. But now, Elsa had nowhere to escape her loneliness. There was no door to knock on, no sister to hold or to hold her; there were only the sounds of the forest and the crackling of fire. They were soothing by nature, but a poor substitute for the sister she missed so dearly.
She sighed in frustration and stood from the bed, drawing one of the soft furs around her shoulders more for it's comforting presence than for warmth; she didn't really get cold, after all. Not for the first time, she guiltily wished she hadn't insisted that Anna take their mother's scarf back to Arendelle with her. As quietly as she could, Elsa pushed open the bark-lined opening of her lavvo, peering about the deserted settlement before tiptoeing away and into the forest.
A pair of eyes in the forest watched closely as the queen left the safety of the encampment. After a moment, their owner began to follow her soundlessly through the forest.