Winter's Echo
Chapter Sixteen - The Winter is a Harsh Mistress
It had been a few weeks since the winter solstice and life in the Northuldra tribe was blissfully peaceful. While Elsa and Honeymaren were rarely found apart when the monarch had first come to the forest, their rapidly blooming young love had made the pair nearly inseparable. Since the beginning of what Anna had playfully referred to as Elsa's "Chronicles of the Enchanted Forest", Honeymaren had been a boon to the winter spirit's troubled soul. Though Honeymaren had initially invited the despondent woman to stay with her for a couple of days, Elsa had yet to step foot in her own lavvo again since her first night in the encampment. The queen didn't bring it up and Honeymaren hadn't hinted she wanted the spirit to leave, both women quite content with the camaraderie and closeness their budding relationship provided. It had taken some time, but Elsa was finally able to laugh freely around the Northuldran and the queen's sharp, quick wit gave Honeymaren a run for her money now that she had helped the blonde build up the confidence to use it. Elsa even openly joked with the noaide in the presence of the other Northuldra, the two finding great joy in pulling tiny pranks on each other - one of which, at the moment, had the queen lying in wait.
Several members of the tribe were in a small group gathering the last lingonberries of the season. Puffs of chilled air dotted the winter sky as the Northuldrans dutifully gathered the bright red berries. The nomads spread out amongst a sizable area covered in the tall bushes, the dark green leaves frosted over prettily with the beginnings of winter. It was one of these bushes the spirit of winter herself was currently crouched behind. Each person carried with them a large, deep basket to collect the tart berries. Almost all of the baskets were nearing full to the brim...
Except for Honeymaren's.
The noaide didn't understand! She was normally one of the swiftest harvesters of the Northuldra, but her basket was filling at an agonizingly slow pace. Even Elsa, who had only done this a few times before, almost had her basket filled to the top the last she had seen! Honeymaren pressed her lips together in determination, her icy breath hanging in annoyed puffs in the chilled air as she delved both hands into the bush she was currently harvesting. Nimble fingers plucked the berries two and three at a time until she couldn't hold anymore, then turn to deposit them in her basket behind her before starting the process over again.
Unbeknownst to the dark-haired woman, however, each time she would turn around to resume her picking a second pair of noticeably paler hands would poke out from the bush behind her, scooping up slightly smaller handfuls than Honeymaren had deposited before retreating into the bush once more. Several other members of the gathering party struggled to hide their giggles at the winter spirit's playful antics - it wasn't often someone got the best of their clever noaide.
"You'd better pick up the pace, Honeymaren," another woman named Naia called playfully. "Especially since your brother is the one that tends to deplete our stores in the first place." The others in the party laughed good naturedly and even Honeymaren grinned, adjusting her thick winter pelt to protect herself from the cold. "I must be getting old like you, Naia," she shot back playfully. "I just don't get it! I feel like I've picked a thousand-" she began, turning around to stare accusingly at her basket just in time to catch a rustle of movement in the bush behind her.
The Northuldran blinked a couple times before rocketing to her feet and peeking over the chest high bush, using her hands to part it for a better look. Surprised blue eyes full of shock and laughter peered back up at her, pretty features twitching in a struggle to hide a guilty grin. The tan woman leaned over a bit further to see a pair of traitorous pale hands hovering over a very full basket of quite familiar looking berries. As Honeymaren put the final pieces of the puzzle together, she slowly lifted her vengeful gaze up to meet the double-crossing queen's. Elsa grinned broadly before blatantly dumping the handfuls of berries in her own basket.
Honeymaren gasped at the cheeky audacity of the act and immediately took off to her right, intent on rounding the bush and delivering swift and terrible retribution, shouting her plans for the mutinous queen. Elsa yelped in fear and delight, scrambling to her feet and taking off in the opposite direction laughing loudly, both women's baskets forgotten. The others in the party laughed loud and long as Honeymaren gave chase to the nimble spirit, eventually leading them beyond sight.
"You just wait until I get my hands on you, you dirty, double crossing blonde!" Honeymaren called, easily following said blonde's path through the bare trees as snow began to fall across the land. Elsa just laughed breathlessly and continued to run, her hair streaming behind her in a curtain of white gold, true happiness making her feel as though she could fly; finally, she felt truly free. Honeymaren played no small part in that feeling and the woman's presence alone gave the queen certainty in her choices over the past several months since coming to the forest.
As they reached the shore, Elsa ran down the small embankment and disappeared behind a large rocky outcropping, trying her hardest to quiet her exerted panting as she hid from her love. She listened with a grin for the crunch of Honeymaren's boots on the quickly whitening forest floor. The mischievous spirit blinked in confusion after a moment when she had yet to hear any sign of the woman. She hadn't been that far behind Elsa had she?
Icy blue eyes narrowed suspiciously, sure the cunning noaide was up to something and pressed closer to the smooth, water worn surface of the tall rock she was concealed behind. Eventually, curiosity got the better of her and a blonde head peeked around the edge of her sanctuary just enough to get a glimpse of the surrounding forest behind it. She blinked when she saw no sign of Honeymaren, surprised she had actually evaded the Northuldran. Elsa grinned and ducked behind the rock again, quite pleased with herself.
Almost on cue, Honeymaren suddenly appeared in front of her, jumping down from her hiding place on top of the rock with a loud cry of "GOTCHA!" Elsa gave a short scream, her whole body locking in fright while the Northuldran howled with laughter. The queen placed a hand over her heart as though to prevent it from pounding right out of her chest, glaring at the giggling woman. She flicked a dainty finger in Honeymaren's direction, causing a frosty wind to blow up the tan woman's shirt, replacing her victorious chortling with an undignified yelp. The triumphant grin never left the Northuldran's pretty features, however, as she hugged herself, rubbing her arms quickly to bring back some heat.
Elsa continued to glare at her, though her heartbeat and breathing had already begun to slow. Honeymaren's grin turned ever so slightly apologetic as she held her arms out to the miffed queen. "Truce?" Elsa narrowed her eyes at her, but made no effort to curb the smile that graced her pretty features. Honeymaren took that as an invitation and moved forward with a small chuckle, wrapping her arms around the queen's trim waist to pull her into a warm embrace. "I'm sorry, Snowflake," she said with a chuckle. "Mhmm," Elsa hummed skeptically, though she didn't hesitate to wrap her arms around the Northuldran's neck to happily return the affection. "Sure you are. You are lucky I am a benevolent spirit," she joked as she snuggled into the woman. She truly cherished these stolen moments of tender affection. While she and the brunette were not often far beyond touching distance, Elsa was always aware of the many eyes around the camp. She rarely had the opportunity to soak in the closeness of the Northuldran as she did now beyond the privacy of their abode.
One night, Elsa had been laying on her side in the lavvo she and Honeymaren shared, propped up on her elbow and reading a book she had brought back with her on one of her trips to visit Anna. When it wasn't turning a page, her other hand rested lazily on her hip, slender fingers idly toying with a snowflake she had created. Around and over she spun the floating crystal in her hand, absorbed in the pages that lay on her bedroll before her.
Out of nowhere, Honeymaren, who had been sitting quietly on her own bedroll across the dwelling whittling a small piece of wood, suddenly decided the queen was too far away. She crawled across the ground to the wintery spirit, then turned and partially flopped on her, resting her head in the curve of the blonde's waist and using her as a pillow before wordlessly going back to her project. Elsa blinked in only mild surprise, quite used to the Northuldran's antics by now and simply hummed in amusement. The queen immediately dissipated the snowflake and instead began to rhythmically run her fingers through the much more alluring magic of Honeymaren's dark, wavy tresses. They stayed like that contentedly for several hours, Elsa continuing to play with the Northuldran's hair long after the woman had fallen asleep under the relaxing touch. Since then, the pair often found themselves in a similar position as they took turns reading to the other aloud, one's voice almost always lulling the other into a peaceful slumber.
Over the past couple of months, Elsa had come to crave the other woman's touch in these ways and found herself going out of her way to make contact with her, even in the presence of the other Northuldra. Slight brushes of hands, playfully bumping her shoulder, sitting closer to her than necessary during the evening meals - Elsa was addicted to the warmth of the Northuldran in every sense of the word. Much to the shy queen's delight, Honeymaren seemed to have no qualms about it, just as often reaching out to touch the spirit for no reason other than she simply wanted to. The noaide was much bolder than Elsa in her affection, her honest and open personality preventing the societal inhibitions that often caused the proper queen to deny herself the things she wanted to do. She never hesitated to rest her head on Elsa's shoulder or run her fingers through blonde locks, which brought the magical woman unending happiness.
Elsa was pulled from her happy musings when Honeymaren loosened her hold on the queen, craning her neck back to look up at the gray sky. Fat, heavy snowflakes floated everywhere around them, giving the already enchanted forest a particularly magical, serene feel. "Is this your doing, Snowflake?" Honeymaren asked as she marveled at the beautiful scene. Elsa smiled warmly, joining her in admiring the picturesque landscape. "No," she whispered serenely. "This is purely the wonder of the winter."
Honeymaren lowered her eyes to gaze at the queen, taking in the most beautiful view yet. She felt her heart swell as she watched the spirit gaze about the winter wonderland with a happy, relaxed smile on her face. Elsa was so much more at peace than she had been when she first came to live with the Northuldra. Finally, she was well on her way to being more comfortable in her own skin and it made her all the more beautiful in Honeymaren's eyes.
Honeymaren loved Elsa, deeply and fiercely. Never in her dizziest daydreams did she think her feelings would ever be returned. While it wasn't uncommon for two women to fall in love, it was far less talked about in the polite society Elsa had been brought up in and likely not an option the blonde queen would consider - or so she had thought. Elsa had confused the noaide's normally keen senses more than anyone Honeymaren had ever known from day one. In the beginning, it was difficult for the Northuldran to decipher what was an act of affection that carried a deeper meaning versus an innate need for the closeness and human contact the queen had been denied the majority of her life. Looking back on the time they had spent together, she now realized why she had been so confused - in reality, it was both.
As she stared in wonder at the beautiful woman, Honeymaren felt a heavy pressure on her chest. Standing so close, Elsa's arms still loosely wrapped around the Northuldran's neck, the wintery spirit's element falling softly all about her - it was more than Honeymaren's heart could take. Suddenly, she couldn't picture her life without the ability to take the beautiful woman in her arms as she was now. She couldn't imagine a world where she couldn't pull the spirit close and kiss her with everything she was...and she didn't want to. She was tired of living a lie that had her hiding the happiest part of her life from view. Honeymaren wanted, more than anything, to commit her life to the beautiful woman before her, to bind herself to her, and for Elsa to do the same.
The queen felt the weight of the dark-haired woman's gaze on her, looking away from the snowfall to meet her intense eyes. Elsa's stomach fluttered as the women stared at each other for a long moment, sensing a change in her lover. The air around them felt heavy, like she couldn't draw a breath, her heart beating so hard she was sure Honeymaren could hear it. Subconsciously, pale fingers toyed with the baby-soft hair at the base of the Northuldran woman's neck as she stared into her eyes. Darkening blue chips of ice darted between full lips and intense chocolate pools in unknowing anticipation.
Honeymaren hadn't realized she had been leaning toward Elsa until she saw the queen's eyes flick down to her lips and back. Even then, she only realized she had been inching closer when she needed close only the smallest of distances before pressing her lips warmly against the winter spirit's. Blue eyes fluttered closed with a small gasp as her stomach did flips inside of her. Elsa could hear her own blood roaring in her ears as Honeymaren placed one hand behind her head and tangled her fingers into her hair. Rather than pull her closer as Elsa thought and hoped she would, the Northuldran ended the kiss, letting her lips linger only millimeters from the queen's.
Elsa was having trouble breathing as she forced her hazy eyes to open, Honeymaren's own passion-glazed eyes searching for any hint of hesitation from the lightly panting queen. Finding none, she claimed the spirit's lips once more, using the hand she had buried in Elsa's hair to tilt the queen's head slightly and pressing closer, deepening the kiss. Elsa's back hit the unyielding surface of the rock as Honeymaren pressed into her, the sensation of the noaide's body against hers driving the queen beyond all thought. Pale hands slid from the Northuldran's shoulders to cup her warm face, holding the woman close to her.
Suddenly a loud, eerie howl cut through the silence of the trees, the noise making the lovers break apart with a jump. It was close - very close. Honeymaren tilted her head to the side to hear better as more howls answered the first, her eyes serious and devoid of all the warmth and passion they had held seconds ago as a shiver of conditioned fear ran down her spine. Since her near-death in her youth, wolves terrified the brave noaide. When she didn't hear anything for a moment, she turned back to Elsa who was also listening to the forest around them with worry. "Come on," she said gently, brushing the back of her fingers along Elsa's cheek. "Let's get-"
Her sentence was interrupted by a blood curdling scream coming from the forest followed by another and another as more horrified voices formed a cacophony of panic, punctuated by loud growls and barks. Honeymaren immediately took off into the trees back in the direction they had come from, Elsa hot on her heels as they raced toward the sounds of terror. Less than a minute later, the two sprinting women broke through the tree line to the clearing they had been harvesting the berries in to find utter chaos and hysteria. A pack of wolves nearly a dozen strong had set upon the gathering party. Blood stained the stark white snow generously and one of the Northuldrans lay on the ground, screaming in pain and clutching her leg as blood seeped through her fingers. The rest of the gatherers were formed in a tight, defensive circle around the injured woman, armed only with walking staffs or their now empty baskets as barriers between them and the hungry predators. Several of the wolves circled the group, snapping occasionally to test their defenses, looking for the best way to separate them from their meal.
"Stay here," Honeymaren said hastily, pushing Elsa back into the tree line with her arm as her head swiveled left and right, trying to formulate a plan. "Are you crazy?! No, I can help!" Elsa cried, grabbing a fistful of Honeymaren's shirt. "I can stop them-" Honeymaren whipped around fiercely, putting her hands on Elsa's shoulders and pushing her against a tree. "No!" she said sharply and Elsa gasped at the dark look in her love's eyes. "You will do nothing, Elsa. You swore it to me. No matter what happens, that comes first, do you hear me, spirit?"
Finally, one wolf was brave enough to leap into the fray, attacking Naia, the woman who had playfully heckled Honeymaren not twenty minutes ago. Naia was also one of the unlucky souls that had only a basket to defend herself. Naia screamed and thrust the basket between her and the wolf's snapping jaws as she hit the ground hard, the force of the beast's attack nearly shredding the bottom of the basket. The wolf was on her in a flash and Naia held the basket up again, catching the beast's mouth on the thickly woven handle and sobbing in terror. "Wait!" Elsa cried as Honeymaren raced into the chaos, making a beeline for Naia. Elsa immediately made to follow, but was suddenly held back by an invisible, whistling force. "Gale, what are you doing?!" Elsa cried and watched in horror as Honeymaren tackled the large beast off of the struggling woman, sending Northuldran and wolf sprawling across the forest floor. Honeymaren wrapped her arms and legs in a vice-like grip around the struggling creature, her tight bear hug on its neck all that was preventing it from turning its head enough to reach her throat with its vicious teeth. "RUN NAIA! GET THE OTHERS!" Honeymaren screamed, squeezing the snarling beast as hard as she could.
Elsa struggled hard against Gale, screaming for the wind spirit to let her go as she tried to reach Honeymaren. *Mistress, you mustn't! It is nature's course! We must not interfere!* came Gale's whispery voice in Elsa's mind. "But she will DIE!" Elsa cried, looking up and around wildly as though she would find a face to reason with. *Then she will die, if that is nature's course,* came the wind spirit's dark reply. Elsa looked frantically back at Honeymaren and realized with dismay that the Northuldran was losing her grip on the massive beast, snapping jaws drawing ever closer to her flesh. Honeymaren's panicked eyes met hers across the clearing as she struggled to reach her, an ever growing whirlwind surrounding the queen; a whirlwind that began to glow ice blue as Elsa's powers started to build. Nothing was going to stop her from saving Honeymaren - nothing.
"ELSA, DON'T!" Elsa's wide eyes opened impossibly wider with shock as she stared at Honeymaren, the Northuldran so very close to losing her grip. The wolf was beginning to turn in her grasp now, its thick fur making it impossible to hold tightly enough. "RUN, ELSA! DON'T LOOK! JUST TURN AROUND AND RUN!" Honeymaren screamed at her. Elsa's head whipped to the right to see the rest of the tribe in the distance, running headlong to the scene to help, Naia showing them the way. They were armed with long machetes and spears, gifts of Arendelle, but Elsa knew they wouldn't reach her in time. Her head swiveled back to Honeymaren who now had tears streaming down her face. Elsa let out a strangled sob at the sight.
Honeymaren knew she was about to die.
And she was scared.
"GO, ELSA!" Honeymaren yelled one last time, pleading with her love. "TURN AROUND AND DON'T LOOK BACK! DON'T LOOK BACK!" Finally, the beast wrestled out of Honeymaren's grasp. The Northuldran managed to land a solid kick to its chest as it pulled away, creating some distance but not enough. She brought her arms in front of her face in a last ditch effort to fend him off when a bright, bluish white light filled the forest like an explosion. A freezing blast of air that chilled Honeymaren to her soul hit her like a stampede of reindeer and stole the breath from her lungs.
Honeymaren blinked her eyes rapidly, trying to clear the haze of the bright light from her vision. When her eyes finally focused, they opened to snapping jaws inches away from her face. She instantly scrambled backward, an arm raising defensively before she realized they weren't moving.
The wolf was frozen where it stood, in the middle of the deadly blow that would have ended her life. Honeymaren looked around the clearing to see each and every wolf in the pack had been turned to an eerie, ferocious ice sculpture. Elsa was on her knees across the clearing, panting heavily and shaking from the exertion and adrenaline. The queen felt like she was going to be sick. She had almost watched the woman she loved die a horrible death right in front of her and was so close to not stopping it in time.
She felt ill for a deeper reason, as well, one that had nothing to do with the Northuldran. She felt an ache inside of her soul; she had violated spiritual law and interfered in the natural course of events. Honeymaren had warned her of this before. While, to the noaide's knowledge, there was no guaranteed recourse to her actions if she did interfere or meddle - she was the ruler of the spirits, after all - it was a crime against the order of nature. *What have you done, mistress...?* came Gale's lilting, disembodied voice. "I saved her," Elsa spat. "You were going to let her die!" *Spirits picking and choosing sides and favorites, to put their own desires above the laws of nature herself, is courting chaos,* Gale whispered, quoting the warning Honeymaren had given her the first week she had spent with the Northuldra.
Honeymaren began making her way over to Elsa, her legs shaky from the chaos as the rest of the Northuldra that had been running to help arrived, flocking to tend to their injured kin. The queen stood and looked at Honeymaren with an unreadable expression before turning around and walking away from her into the forest. Honeymaren frowned and had to jog to catch up to the quickly disappearing spirit. "Elsa," she called, trying to get her to stop as they ventured further from the clamoring of the tribe. "Don't," Elsa said acidly, not slowing or bothering to look at the woman pursuing her. The foreign tone in the queen's voice made Honeymaren pause for a moment. The Northuldran pressed her lips together in grim determination before resuming her chase. The tree line opened up again to reveal the shore where the women had just stolen a kiss not five minutes earlier. The snow was still falling, the scenery was still beautiful, and the air was still heavy...but with something much darker than before. Finally, Honeymaren caught up to the queen and reached out to grasp her left wrist. "Elsa, wait!"
The sound of a sharp slap echoed through the quiet of the trees, causing several birds to take flight in fear. Honeymaren's head flew to the side, an angry red handprint on her cheek as she stared at Elsa in disbelief, her own hand slowly reaching up to gingerly touch the stinging skin. The Snow Queen was visibly shaking with rage, her hands balled into fists at her side and angry tears welling in furious blue eyes. "Elsa, what-" Honeymaren tried before she was harshly interrupted. "How dare you..." Elsa whispered angrily. The blonde woman whirled around to yell across the fjord at the spirits themselves. "How dare ANY of you?!" The queen whipped back around to face Honeymaren, angry tears finally rolling down her cheeks. "How dare you lay there and just fucking die?!" She yelled at the woman accusingly. "Is the natural order so important you would have me watch you die?!"
"Yes!" Honeymaren shouted, throwing her hands in up frustration. "Yes, Elsa, it is! And do you know why?! Because one human life is meaningless in the greater plan for this world. If my death was supposed to happen in that moment, then my life is forfeit and I go willingly to the arms of Ahtohallan knowing I have put more good into this world than bad!" Honeymaren growled, picking up a river stone and throwing it as hard as she could into the water with a frustrated yell. "You promised me, Elsa! You swore to me you would never do what you just did. Your life is never something worth risking, especially for me!"
A small, strangled sob escaped the winter spirit, her eyes flashing with a helplessness and fear that made the shocked Northuldran's heart hurt, immediately draining all the fight from her. "Is...is it so easy to leave me, Maren?" Elsa whispered painfully. "Elsa...you can't defy nature. It is a balance that must be upheld at all costs or our world will fall to ruin," Honeymaren began slowly, reaching out to the emotional woman. "Elsa, listen to me..."
The blonde queen shook her head fervently, her earlier rage returning in seconds. "No, Northuldran. You listen to me," she hissed as angry tears fell rapidly. "All of you, listen to me," she said louder, including the spirits in her declaration. Honeymaren felt the temperature dropping quickly, knowing the snow had nothing to do with the reason as she stared at the enraged winter spirit, her breath coming in fast white puffs of smoke. "I am Queen Elsa of Arendelle and the Fifth Spirit. You do not rule me. You do not decide what I do or don't do, how I use or don't use my powers, what my life is or isn't worth. You do not own me. My will is my own," she said coldly before looking directly into Honeymaren's eyes. "And you do not speak for me, noaide," she spat icily, invoking her title.
Elsa turned and walked toward the water, calling for Nokk in her mind. "Elsa, wait, please," Honeymaren begged as she reached out to try to grasp Elsa's hand, only for the angry spirit to throw it off. "Don't you dare touch me." Elsa's voice was colder than her ice as she denied the noaide's touch for the first time since the day she met her. Honeymaren staggered slightly, feeling like she had been punched in her very soul. Nokk appeared instantly and silently, obediently kneeling for his stormy mistress to mount him. Without a word or a glance back at the silent Northuldran, the incensed monarch and her watery steed took off across the fjord toward Ahtohallan, disappearing into the late afternoon horizon. Honeymaren sank to her knees on the rocky shore, silent tears streaming down her face as she stared after her. She stayed there like that for a long while, unmoving as the light faded and the reality of the situation set in.
Slowly, she turned her head to look at the rocky outcropping where they had shared their last amazing, beautiful kiss and nearly sobbed at the memory, for she knew what she had to do. An old story her parents used to tell her and Ryder about the darker truth of love flitted through her mind. 'The moon is a harsh mistress; it is hard to love her well, for she is hard to call your own. But the sun so loved the moon, he died every night to let her breathe.' The memory of her mother's sweet voice floated through her mind as she stared at the ghosts of their lover's embrace. Her lofty dreams of binding herself to Elsa shattered like glass, their sharp edges cutting her soul to tattered shreds; what an arrogant fool she had been to think she could call Elsa her own. No, she could not call the wintery spirit her own...but like the sun and the moon, she would love her well - and would die every day just for her to rise. Honeymaren dragged herself to her feet and slowly walked over to the large rock, touching the spot where she had kissed Elsa to near breathlessness...for the last time. She pressed her forehead against it and wept for the loss of her love.
AN:
Welp...I'm depressed now, but necessary evil to come, I'm afraid!
Thanks for those that review, especially those that have followed this story and continue to review. Winter's Echo is always morphing in my mind and I love finding out what you guys like, so please read and review to see more!
-Volchise