Trigger Warning: Physical Abuse PTSD
Winter's Echo
Chapter Thirty-Eight – Fulfillment
"Elsa...is this...how did...? Wow..." Honeymaren gasped with awe as she dismounted Nokk in a daze, staring up in wonder at the huge, intricate ice palace nestled against the face of the North Mountain. Elsa modestly tried to reign in the bashful, but proud grin tugging at the corners of her lips. Her heart soared with pride as she took in the clear delight on her lover's face at witnessing her masterpiece of freedom from years ago. She let her eyes linger on the crystal spires with a bittersweet pride. Though her time spent here was so short, it housed so many pivotal moments in the queen's life from her near assassination to striking her sister in the heart with her magic to the first moments the blonde had ever felt truly free.
Which was why Elsa had suggested they come here in the first place. If Ahtohallan decreed they must be surrounded by her magic and her freedom, what more appropriate place than her very first, rebellious act of freely using her magic? "There truly is nothing you can't do, Elsa. How you've not managed to take over the world is beyond me," Honeymaren said with a playful, helpless shrug. Elsa smirked a bit, swinging her leg over Nokk as she prepared to dismount, her eyes twinkling with amusement when she met her lover's gaze. "Because some amazing soul somewhere invented chocolate. If I want to keep my supplies strong, I must allow the world to live in peace. It is a necessary sacrifice," she answered with a sage nod before moving to slide off of Nokk.
"Wait!"
Elsa blinked, freezing on the spot as Honeymaren hurried over to her. "Your leg," Honeymaren reminded her gently. "That would really hurt if you jumped off of him like that." The queen frowned for a moment in confusion, flexing her ankle and calf muscles experimentally. "Actually, it doesn't hurt too badly, anymore," Elsa began slowly, blinking once more. "At all, actually. Not since...Ahtohallan," she amended with wonder. Honeymaren raised a curious eyebrow and moved the icy cape of Elsa's traveling outfit aside, Elsa waving her hand to dissipate the lower half of her legging so the noaide could inspect the wound. The dark-haired woman unraveled the bandages and ran her warm, sun-kissed hands along the pale, creamy skin of Elsa's calf. Twilight flecked eyes widened in surprise to find not only was there no longer a wound, but there wasn't a single blemish to be found as evidence it had existed at all.
"Ahtohallan must have healed you, somehow," Honeymaren murmured as she continued to run her warm fingers carefully along the soft, smooth skin, feeling for any soreness as she glanced up at Elsa. "You're not in any pain?" she asked dubiously, pinning the queen with her gaze that was ready to detect any brave lie the proud blonde might tell. Instead, Elsa smiled and shook her head, closing her eyes slowly. "No," she said quietly, relaxing under her lover's soothing touch. "No pain at all." One crystal blue eye opened to regard the noaide, twinkling with amusement. "Does this mean no more free rides?" she asked playfully, a devious smile tugging at her lips. "And here I was getting used to it. It took me a few years, but I think I quite like the royal treatment." Honeymaren raised an eyebrow at the clear mischief in the blonde's tone before her own devious streak kicked in. Without a word, Honeymaren allowed her fingertips to trail slowly from Elsa's sensitive knee, down her calf, and to her ankle, watching with a small smirk as she saw the blonde shiver from the touch.
Right before she wrapped her hand around Elsa's ankle and gave it a hard tug.
Elsa yelped in surprise as she was pulled off balance, slipping rather ungracefully from her position atop Nokk and directly into a grinning Honeymaren's waiting arms that guided her slowly to the ground. She looked into the noaide's eyes breathlessly, unsure of what had just happened to her. Before she could make a comment however, Honeymaren's lips claimed hers in a soft, loving kiss and the queen melted against her, all rational thought flying from her mind. When Honeymaren pulled away, she pressed her forehead to Elsa's lovingly, whispering against her lips as she pulled her close. "I will always carry you in any way you could ever want me too, my queen." Elsa blushed and smiled, dropping her head to bury her face against Honeymaren's neck and tucking her arms up against her chest. They stayed that way for several minutes as Elsa soaked in the feeling of simply being held once more, releasing a deep, contented sigh.
"I love you," she whispered softly against sun-kissed skin, slowly sliding one hand up Honeymaren's chest to her neck and placing a soft, lingering kiss against it as her fingers toyed with the soft baby hairs at the base of her neck. Honeymaren smiled, nuzzling against the queen lovingly. "I love you too, Elsa." A small, attention-seeking whicker brought them out of their romantic moment and Elsa turned to smile at Nokk, who was simply watching them expectantly. Pale hands moved to either side of Nokk's muzzle as she pressed her forehead against his icy face. "Thank you, my friend, for everything. You may go, we are safe here." Nokk lifted his head to nuzzle his mistress's hair softly before turning and disappearing back the way they came to look for the nearest source of water.
"Come on," Elsa said with an excited grin as she grabbed Honeymaren's hand, tugging her through the snow. "I want to show you something." Honeymaren blinked in confusion as Elsa led them away from the ice palace. "But...but the...the sparkly castle..." she fumbled, pointing back the other way with her free hand and digging her heels in slightly in reluctance. Elsa giggled, turning around and using both hands to pull her as she backed away. "Come on, slowpoke!" Honeymaren blinked again before her eyes narrowed dangerously. "...what did you just call me?" The grin on Elsa's face grew and she dropped the hand she held captive, backing away slowly as she saw her lover shift her body weight, Honeymaren's shoulders dipping slightly as she prepared to pounce on the queen. Elsa yelped in giddy excitement when the noiade made her move, leaping toward the spirit of winter and making a grab for her. The queen just barely managed to dance beyond her grip before she turned and ran, laughing as Honeymaren immediately gave chase.
Elsa eluded her lover for less than half a minute before she shrieked in delighted surprise when she felt strong arms snag her from behind, lifting her in the air and holding her captive. "AHA!" Honeymaren proclaimed triumphantly. "I WIN!" Elsa giggled breathlessly, turning in the Northuldran's arms once her feet hit the ground again and bringing her face tantalizingly close to hers. "I surrender, my love," she murmured against Honeymaren's lips. The dark-haired woman's eyes fluttered closed in preparation of what was sure to be a sweet kiss of victory...before being met with a face full of snow.
Elsa laughed gleefully as she sprinted away again, Honeymaren wiping the snow from her face in disbelief. "Oh, now you've done it, Snowflake," she growled playfully before giving chase once more. This time she showed no mercy as she caught up to her lover, tackling her into the snow as soon as she had her arms around her before she invoked the most heinous punishment imaginable for her attempted escape. The queen of winter began to twitch and squirm uncontrollably, laughing breathlessly as nimble fingers found Elsa's sensitive ribcage and began to tickle her mercilessly. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! You win!" Elsa cried through tears of laughter, but Honeymaren only grinned and kept up her assault. "Oh no, you don't! I'm not falling for that again!" she crowed, laughing as Elsa rolled onto her stomach and hugged herself in an attempt to protect her ticklish ribs from Honeymaren's evil fingers.
Honeymaren simply grinned wider and attacked the queen's undefended neck and underarms, eliciting a shriek from the blonde as she rolled every which way she could to elude the Northuldran's nimble fingers. When Honeymaren squeezed Elsa's leg just above her knee, the queen yelped and immediately jerked away, rolling over to her back once more. The moment she did, Honeymaren instantly claimed the breathless queen's lips in a deep kiss, one hand cupping Elsa's cheek while the other captured one of the spirit's hands, entwining their fingers lovingly. Elsa's heart threatened to beat out of her chest as it hammered out its fast-paced rhythm, her body's fight or flight energy from the Northuldran's tickle attack turning instantly into a deep-seated passion and need for the woman above her. Suddenly, she felt like she was already racing toward that blissful edge without Honeymaren even touching her as her pants for breath quickly turned to quiet, gasping moans, her body instinctively arching into her lover.
When she felt Honeymaren's tongue glide across her lip, begging entrance as she deepened the kiss, Elsa's rational mind fell away with a desperate whimper. Without a second thought, she grasped the hand cupping her cheek and yanked it down, guiding it beneath the waistband of her leggings to where she so desperately needed it. She moaned loudly into the kiss as Honeymaren's fingers instantly followed the queen's bidding, slipping into the already abundant slickness she found there. Elsa broke away from the kiss with a gasp as her hips bucked needily against her lover's hand. "By the Gods, I've missed you," she whimpered breathlessly in her ear, threading her fingers through the waves of dark silk and pulling her closer.
Honeymaren groaned at the whispers in her ear, clinging to that voice for dear life as pain lanced through her head. A fast-paced montage of memories of Elsa writhing beneath her in pleasure assaulted her mind in the worst, yet most wonderful way possible and it was all she could do to block out the pain. She planted her lips feverishly against the winter spirit's pale, smooth neck, trying to anchor herself in this beautiful moment with her love lest she lose herself to the searing pain. So intent was she on her task, she didn't feel Elsa stiffen beneath her right away, nor did she immediately notice Elsa's movements become less needy and more closed off.
For in an instant, Elsa's entire world turned upside down. She closed her eyes in pleasurable bliss, finally reconnecting with her lover in every sense of the word. But when she opened them again, suddenly it was no longer her beautiful, loving noaide panting breathlessly above her...but Ulrik.
His hateful black eyes. His evil smile. His vile touch upon her body. Honeymaren was dead. She was bound and helpless in a kingdom far away.
Gustav would not be saving her this time.
"NO!" On instinct, Elsa cried out in primal fear and shoved him away as hard as she could, scrambling backward away from him as fast as possible until she hit the rocky face of the mountain. He wouldn't let her escape, however – he would never let her escape. Within seconds he had her, wrapping his arms around her tightly and holding her captive. She beat against him as hard as she could as she fought to get away, but he was far too strong for her, pinning her arms with his in his captive embrace. "Elsa," he called her name and she closed her eyes tightly, wishing she could cover her ears. He called her again and again as she struggled in terror when suddenly his voice began to change. It became higher, more feminine – suddenly, it was laced with panic and concern instead of hateful malice. Her struggles lessened in confusion. Why did he sound so different? When did his body become so soft? Suddenly, it wasn't sweat and musk she smelled, but leather and cedar and...Maren?
"Elsa! ELSA! Baby, it's okay, you're safe, it's me! Open your eyes!"
Elsa blinked a few times, her hazy vision coming back into focus as she looked up into glassy, chocolate eyes. "Maren?" she whispered in confusion before jerking her head around to search her surroundings in fear. "He's not here, Elsa, he's gone. He's dead. He can never hurt you again. It's just you and I up here," Honeymaren said soothingly, pulling Elsa close to her as the queen began to shake violently. "I-I'm so sorry," she whispered, bringing a trembling hand up to touch her forehead as tears of both fear and relief fell from the queen's haunted crystalline eyes. "Gods, I-I don't know what happened..." Honeymaren shushed her instantly, running her fingers through silky waves of white-gold. "Shhh, my love, you don't have to explain anything. Take your time and let yourself relax. We can just sit here quietly until you feel safe again, okay?"
Elsa shook her head in defiance, her anxiety seeping into her voice as her tears began to fall faster. "No! I know I'm safe with you. I'm always safe with you. I-I..." she trailed off, unable to vocalize how she felt because she didn't quite understand it, herself. Honeymaren only nodded, gathering the tense and rigid queen up into her lap and cradling her in her arms. "Of course you know that, sweet spirit. But we're not going anywhere until your body does too, okay? You didn't do anything wrong," she murmured as she guided Elsa's head to rest against her chest. "I just want you to try to relax, alright? Just listen to my breathing." Elsa exhaled shakily and nodded, allowing her lover to simply hold her close. She closed her eyes as she listened to the strong, steady beat of her noaide's heart; a comforting rhythm that would forevermore be the most reassuring sound in the world to the queen.
After several minutes, Honeymaren felt Elsa begin to relax fully against her. Tense muscles loosening and a slow, quiet exhale through the nose told her the queen was ready to talk before she even pulled away. When Elsa wiped away the last of her tears and lifted her head to look at her lover properly, her face crumbled suddenly as she gazed upon Honeymaren. "...what's wrong?" Honeymaren asked in confusion, her eyebrows furrowed as she searched Elsa's gaze. "What did I do to you...?" Elsa whispered brokenly, tenderly reaching to the side of the dark-haired woman's face to brush her fingers up against her ear. "You're bleeding..." Chocolate eyes blinked in confusion, her own hand flying to her ear and feeling a warm, wet substance pooled there. When she pulled her fingers back to look at them, her eyes widened in surprise to find she was, indeed bleeding. "You didn't do anything, Elsa. You just pushed me away, you didn't do this," she reassured the blonde, touching her fingers to her ear again. There was no pain from a wound or anything of the like, only-
"The headaches..." Honeymaren mused aloud, turning her eyes to Elsa as they grew wide in realization. "From memories of us making love. This is what she meant." Elsa's brows furrowed in concern and confusion. "I don't understand, what do you mean?" she asked uncertainly, dreading the answer as she took in the crestfallen look on her lover's face. Honeymaren ran her fingers through her hair shakily. "Ahtohallan said you needed to give me my last remaining memories of us. I think...those are the only ones I haven't fully recovered since we haven't..." she trailed off for a few seconds, a slight blush filling her cheeks before she looked worriedly into Elsa's eyes. "And that's what she meant when she said we would have to go through a pain neither of us have experienced before," she said quietly. "Me, it's the physical pain, but you..." she trailed off, unable to finish her sentence.
"Reliving everything with Ulrik," Elsa whispered, laying her head against Honeymaren's chest and pressing closer to her for comfort. Honeymaren bit her lip, her mind racing for a solution and coming up despairingly empty. "Elsa...I-" she began, but stopped when the queen just shook her head, turning slightly to bury her face against her lover. "Please don't," she whispered as she pressed closer. "Just...hold me...please," she begged. She didn't want to be given hope or reassurances that it was going to be alright; if Ahtohallan herself said it would be a pain unlike anything she'd ever experienced, she knew there was no skirting around it. Honeymaren instantly wrapped her arms protectively around the defeated woman, pulling her as close as she could as she laid her head atop soft blonde locks. The dark-haired woman bit her lip to prevent herself from saying that it would be okay because she knew it would not be. The brief flash of terror she had felt from the queen on Ahtohallan had brought the empath to her knees and it had only been from a memory. When Elsa actually thought she was back in that moment...it nearly broke the noaide. She mentally shook herself from the memory – and Elsa needed a distraction so she could do the same.
"Hey," she said after a few moments, bumping her head playfully against Elsa's to get her to look at her. "What did you want to show me, gorgeous?" Elsa blinked as she looked up into chocolate eyes and blushed at the endearment. "Incorrigible flirt," she muttered as she hid her face against Honeymaren's chest, though the noaide could feel the small smile tugged at her lips. Honeymaren grinned and squeezed the blonde against her for a moment, dipping her head to nuzzle her nose against Elsa's cheek so she couldn't hide from her. "I tell you that you're gorgeous and then you try to hide it from me?" she asked incredulously as she planted playful kisses anywhere she could reach. Elsa's smile grew as she shied away from her love's prodding with a quiet giggle, ducking her head beneath the dark-haired woman's chin where she couldn't reach. "Excuse me, Your Majesty, but I think I was promised a lifetime of that face!" Honeymaren said with a laugh, even as she pulled her closer. "I was also promised a worthwhile reason for NOT being inside the sparkly ice castle kissing its beautiful creator senseless."
Elsa rolled her eyes in fake exasperation before sighing loudly, though she was unable to keep the smile from her face at her lover's antics. "Fine, since you've apparently got as much patience as Anna," she jibed as she untangled herself from her warm embrace and stood, offering her hand to the dark-haired woman. Honeymaren put a hand to her chest in feigned hurt. "Now that was a low blow. Not very queen-like behavior, if I do say so myself," she chided as she took the offered hand and stood. Elsa smiled when the empath only adjusted her hand to hold it more comfortably instead of releasing it, swinging their clasped hands gently between them as they walked. "And just how would you know what is or is not "queen-like" behavior, pray tell?" Elsa asked, raising her eyebrow challengingly, subtly pressing closer to her noaide as they walked.
Honeymaren looked skyward for a moment as she thought before she shrugged nonchalantly. "I suppose you're right. I have no idea how a queen ought to behave. I've no interest in them, anyway. Royalty never did appeal to me." Elsa blinked in surprise at that before biting her lip slightly, unsure how to respond to that jibe. "After all," Honeymaren continued after a moment, and Elsa looked up to see the sly smile on her lover's beautiful face, her mischievous chocolate gaze peeking at her from the corner of her eyes. "Why should I care what a queen does when my wife is a goddess? Now that's more my style." Elsa blushed hotly and gently smacked Honeymaren's arm with her free hand. "Incorrigible," she huffed before gasping in surprise when she was suddenly pulled against her lover, her lips instantly claimed in a kiss far softer and more tender than she could have anticipated. She sighed contentedly as she melted against Honeymaren, allowing her lover, her wife, to wash away all of her fears and stress for these few precious moments. "Not incorrigible," Honeymaren murmured against her lips when she pulled away slightly, pressing her forehead against the winter spirit's. "In love. Hopelessly, endlessly, and so very deeply in love."
Elsa exhaled shakily, bringing her hands up to caress Honeymaren's cheeks slowly as she pressed her forehead into hers. She sniffled quietly, a single happy tear escaping from behind her closed eyes. "Do you have any idea how wonderful you are...?" she asked breathlessly. The queen could feel her love's broad smile beneath her fingertips. "Yup," Honeymaren answered as she pulled back, gazing lovingly into glassy crystalline pools when they opened. "Which proves just how amazing you are, because you deserve every ounce of love I have for you, Elsa, and so much more." Elsa laughed softly and shook her head, grasping Honeymaren's hand once more and leading her toward the edge of the cliff they were on. "I think I just got lucky," she said as they walked. "You were pretty easy to fall in love with." Honeymaren smirked and raked her fingers through her hair. "Well, I can't help it if someone falls for these roguish good looks, but I do get a bit of a say in who is deserving of them," she said playfully, squeezing Elsa's hand as they approached the edge of the cliff.
Honeymaren's jaw went slack as she looked out across the view Elsa had brought them to, her eyes impossibly wide. From the edge of the cliff, it looked as though they were flying above the entire world, Honeymaren's stunned chocolate gaze taking in the view for miles and miles around. "Elsa..." she breathed, squeezing the queen's hand tightly as she slowly fell to her knees, the blonde sinking to her own beside her as she stared out across the world in wonder. There was no mist, no wall, no cage hiding the world from her anymore. "It's funny how some distance makes everything seem small, isn't it?" Elsa said quietly as she watched Honeymaren take it all in, tears of wonder slowly trekking down her sun-kissed face. "I've dreamed of bringing you here for the longest time. Ever since Ryder told me both of you were born in the mist I wanted so desperately to show you this. Even before I knew how much you loved me, I wanted some way for you to finally see..." Elsa reached out with her free hand to gently cup Honeymaren's chin, guiding her glassy gaze to hers. "That for all the countries and people and life in this impossibly large world...you are the only woman I will ever see, Honeymaren. The only one I will forever need at my side. In this great, wide world, you are the love of my life that gives it all meaning."
Honeymaren gazed at Elsa in wonder, her chest so tight it was almost painful to breathe. She leaned in and pressed her lips softly against hers, not bothering to try to formulate words she knew would fall impossibly short to express the love she felt for the beautiful queen in that moment. She reached out with her free hand to lace her fingers through Elsa's hair and pull her closer, kissing the queen with every ounce of love and devotion she had as they sat at the edge of the world – the world that was so incredibly large, yet no bigger in that moment than beyond their loving embrace.
By the time Honeymaren was finally able to tear herself away from the view, the sun was beginning to set on the mountain. They walked in comfortable silence, Honeymaren's arm wrapped around Elsa's shoulders and the queen's around Honeymaren's waist, her head nestled comfortably against her shoulder as they trekked back to the castle. Honeymaren smiled when she saw the beautifully intricate staircase leading across a great chasm. Just as she was about to inquire about the lack of dangerous stepping stones as they climbed it, the smile fell when she saw the shattered section of railing halfway up the stairs. "What happened here?" she asked quietly as they came upon the jagged edges of broken ice. Elsa frowned a bit and shook her head, the staircase becoming whole once more with a wave of her hand. "I don't know," she answered quietly. "I wasn't conscious the last time I left."
Honeymaren frowned and instinctively pulled Elsa closer, recalling the queen's tale of what had happened here years ago. "...you haven't been here since, have you?" she asked quietly, though it was more a statement than a question. Elsa shook her head anyway. She didn't elaborate further and Honeymaren didn't pry, knowing she was about to see for herself. As they approached the steps to the castle itself, an ominous rumbling shook the ground and Honeymaren's eyes narrowed. She pulled Elsa closer as she searched for the source of the danger, the rumbling growing louder and harder as whatever caused it barreled closer to them.
Suddenly, the large doors to the castle flew open and an impossibly huge, frightening white monster appeared, spikes of deathly sharp ice protruding menacingly from his body in every direction. Her eyes darted from side to side, desperately looking for a safe place to take Elsa when said woman placed a gentle and entirely too calm kiss on her cheek, an amused smile on her face. "It's alright, darling, I promise." Honeymaren looked at her like she lost her reindeer-loving mind. As she opened her mouth to accuse of her just that, the golem before them bellowed from the top of the staircase.
"MAMA!"
Honeymaren stared in bewilderment at the creature, her mouth hanging open – even Elsa's unabashed laughter wasn't enough to snap her out of her disbelief. "...what the hell did he just call you?" she asked in a daze as she watched the monster clench his ice-spiked fists, laughing and grinning like a giddy child. "Hi Marshmallow!" Elsa called back with a wave and Honeymaren's wide-eyed gaze snapped to her so fast it made Elsa's neck twitch. "What the fuck did you just call him?!" Elsa frowned and flicked the dark-haired woman's ear. "Language!" she chided disapprovingly, though she couldn't keep the amusement out of her voice. Honeymaren's snarky reply died in her throat as the ground rumbled once again when Marshmallow barreled down the stairs toward them, immediately getting on his hands and knees to press his snowy face against Elsa, one hand as big as the queen herself pressing her gently against him in what looked remarkably like a hug.
Elsa smiled broadly and leaned into the fierce golem happily. "I missed you too, big guy. How have you and your brothers and sisters been?" Honeymaren's eyes got impossibly wider. "There's more?!" she exclaimed as she looked around wildly, suddenly suspicious of every snow-covered rock face that could pop to life. Marshmallow turned his head and looked at the person who came to visit with his mother and Elsa smiled, gesturing to her. "Honeymaren, this is Marshmallow. Marshmallow, this is Honeymaren, my..." she paused for a moment, unsure of how to introduce her. As far as the spirits were concerned the beautiful Northuldran was her wife, despite not having been officially wed, but what did that make her to the rest of the world? Elsa's...girlfriend? Consort? Lover?
"Soulmate," Elsa finished confidently, realizing in her heart no other distinction came close to describing the depth of Honeymaren's importance to the queen. "Soon to be my wife, for all intents and purposes." She added the last part with a shy smile before a funny thought struck her. "I guess that makes her your step-mother?" she tacked on with a grin, crystalline eyes twinkling in amusement when Honeymaren gave her a wildly flabbergasted look.
Suddenly, Marshmallow's huge face came entirely too close for Honeymaren's liking as he inspected her closely, the Northuldran forcing herself to stand her ground. Elsa couldn't help the odd swell of pride that surged through her chest at that. Even when faced with an admittedly dangerous and potentially deadly snow golem, Honeymaren wouldn't back down an inch - retreat was simply not in her brave noaide's blood. "Pretty, Mama," Marshmallow declared, even his attempt at a quiet speaking voice vibrating Honeymaren's entire body. "She is quite pretty, isn't she, Marshmallow?" Elsa said with a pointed smile. "I keep telling her that, but she doesn't believe me." Marshmallow looked between Elsa and Honeymaren with clear confusion for a moment before facing Honeymaren again.
"PRETTY!" he yelled insistently. The force of his bellow would have knocked the Northuldran on her back had he not brought his big, icy hand up behind her to catch her. A surprised bark of laughter escaped Elsa as she ran to Honeymaren's aid, placing a calming hand on Marshmallow's face. "Good job, big guy, I don't think she'll question it again. Will you, gorgeous?" she asked with a grin. The queen bit her lip hard in an attempt to stifle her laughter - with her hair now blown behind her in every direction and her hands raised in awkward surprise in front of her, the wide-eyed noaide looked for all the world like a startled cat with its claws out and hackles raised as she laid against Marshmallow's hand. She glared daggers at the queen as best she could in her current state, which only added to the blonde's amusement.
"Marshmallow, thank you for taking such good care of my ice palace. Can I ask you to do another job for me?" Marshmallow nodded emphatically, scooping Honeymaren up and gently depositing her on her feet as he listened closely for his mother's instructions, oblivious to the dark-haired woman's grumbles as she fixed herself. "Can you take all of your brothers and sisters down the mountain for the night? Maren and I have to do something very important and can't be disturbed. You can bring them all back tomorrow afternoon. Can you do that for me?" Marshmallow nodded excitedly, leaning in for another hug from his favorite person in the world before he stood and bellowed wordlessly back in the direction of the castle.
Maren braced herself as another rumbling shook the ground before tilting her head in confusion. It felt...different somehow. Her eyes widened once more as she saw an absolute stampede of tiny, fist-sized snow golems burst from the doors. "Ohhhh no," she moaned as they made a beeline straight for her. She braced herself as best she could as they barreled into her, standing against the tide valiantly for all of two seconds before she was overwhelmed and knocked over. Honeymaren yelped as she was carried away on the wave of sentient snowballs, awkwardly trying to scramble against the current. "ELSAAAAAA!" she cried, but no help would be forthcoming from the queen. Elsa was leaning heavily against Marshmallow's leg as tears of laughter streamed endlessly down her face at the sight of her poor, overwhelmed lover.
"I get her, Mama!" Marshmallow declared, reaching out and plucking Honeymaren from the sea of sentient snow by the back of her tunic with two fingers. He held Honeymaren in the air as she continued to try to kick and swim against the current before realizing she had been rescued. She blinked up at Marshmallow, then glared down at the laughing queen who was now sitting in the snow, doubled over in laughter. "Oh Gods, I can't breathe!" she crowed as she laughed, wiping at the never-ending stream of tears running down her face. Just as she finally calmed down enough to take a breath, she looked up into Honeymaren's face to see her arms crossed petulantly as she hung in the air and lost it all over again.
"ELSA! Tell him to put me DOWN!" Honeymaren groused, and Elsa tried – she really did, but she was laughing far too hard to make out any coherent words. Soon, Marshmallow made sense of his mother's attempts at gesturing and set Honeymaren gingerly on the ground, the Northuldran immediately fixing her tunic and glaring at the queen while the large golem looked at his mother quizzically. In an afterthought, she looked up at the snow beast. "Thank you, Marshmallow," she said curtly. Marshmallow grinned toothlessly at her. "Welcome!" he exclaimed.
Honeymaren walked over to Elsa with her hands on her hips, glaring down at the queen as her giggles slowed and she tried to catch her breath. "I'm so sorry, baby. I couldn't help it," she said through a chuckle, wiping the rest of her tears away and smiling brightly at her. "Gods, I've never laughed that hard in my entire life." Honeymaren couldn't help the loving smile that tugged at her features, all annoyance at her snowy abuse gone in an instant as she offered her hand to the queen. When Elsa took it, she pulled her to her feet and into her arms, placing a soft, quick kiss against her lips. "It's a good thing your laughter is one of my favorite sounds in the world, or I might have taken offense." A slight blush bloomed across pale cheeks as she grinned at her noaide. "I suppose I'll just count that as one more thing that makes me the luckiest woman in the world, hm?" she asked with a wink.
Before Honeymaren could answer, Elsa pulled away to address the snow golem. "Thank you for everything, big guy," she said warmly as he leaned down for a final hug. "Love you, Mama," he said gently, snuggling his snow face up against her. "I love you too, Marshmallow," she replied with a smile, kissing where his nose would be before he stood and wandered off down the mountain after his avalanche of siblings, quickly disappearing in the trees. When she turned back to Honeymaren, she paused upon seeing the wistful smile on the Northuldran's face. "What?" she asked with a small laugh, but Honeymaren simply shook her head and offered her hand. "Come on. I'm dying to see inside."
Elsa smiled and led her up the stairs and through the still open doors, pride swelling within her as Honeymaren took in all the intricate details of her masterpiece. She blushed hotly as Honeymaren showered her with praise, looking about in awe as she followed Elsa up the long staircase. Honeymaren was so busy ogling the beauty of the palace around her, she nearly ran into the suddenly still queen who had paused in front of two large doors, wringing her hands nervously in front of her. Instead of asking her what was wrong, she slipped her arms around the queen's trim waist slowly and held her close, resting her chin on her shoulder quietly. After a moment, Elsa closed her eyes and relaxed against her, pale hands ceasing their nervous fidgeting and falling to cover the ones embracing her as she leaned her head against Honeymaren's. "This is where it happened?" she asked gently, replaying the story Elsa had told her in her mind. Elsa nodded and took a deep breath, releasing it slowly before she waved her hand in the air, the doors opening under her direction.
Honeymaren instinctively tightened her arms around Elsa as she took in the shattered ice scattered across the room that had clearly been the site of a violent struggle, piecing together Elsa's story as she took it all in. A large, crystalline chandelier lay shattered in the middle of the room. Sharp, deadly looking spikes of ice stabbed into one wall, a beautiful balcony destroyed by two large panes of ice directly across from it with a random upright wall of ice in the middle of the room. She could almost see the men that Elsa had pinned there as she fought to defend herself. Elsa slowly walked out of her embrace, crossing the room in an almost trance as she headed for one particularly haunting reminder of what had almost happened in that room a few short years ago.
Elsa came to a pause in front of a thin wall of ice in the middle of the room, staring down at the deadly tip of the crossbow bolt that had almost ended her life protruding from it. She had been inches from death so many times in just a few short minutes that night. Elsa couldn't help the shiver of fear that ran up her spine as she stared at the lethal point bursting forth from her ice, reminding her of another arrow that had been the beginning of the end of her life in the most unimaginably cruel way.
She gasped when the sharp piece of metal began to glow bright red and looked up to see the thin wall it was embedded in quickly melting before her eyes. As it began to fall, her eyes met Honeymaren's piercing gaze, warm and loving chocolate pools now sharp and dangerous as they flared bright pinks and purples. As the rest of the wall melted away, the shaft of the arrow that Honeymaren held burst into flame and quickly turned to ash on the wind coming from the open balcony, the sharp point falling into the fire maven's waiting palm. Elsa stared, transfixed into those wild eyes as Honeymaren closed her hand around the deadly arrowhead in a fist, squeezing forcefully as flames erupted from her hand. When she opened it again, all that remained of it was a melted, distorted scrap of metal. Honeymaren looked away from Elsa only long enough to turn and hurl the small piece of unrecognizable steel as hard as she could through the destroyed balcony doors and off of the side of the North Mountain.
Honeymaren closed the short distance between them and placed her still flaming hands on Elsa's cheeks. The queen gasped and closed her eyes as the incredible warmth of her touch that sent a pleasant tingling sensation throughout her body, for there was no pain to fear from her lover's flame – Honeymaren would never hurt her. "Never again," Honeymaren whispered, and Elsa opened her eyes to gaze into her wife's, the flames in them ebbing and slowly returning to the kind, loving chocolate pools she fell in love with. "Never again," she repeated firmly, brushing her thumbs along Elsa's cheekbones. Elsa nodded, placing her hands over Honeymaren's and leaning in to kiss her tenderly. Before she had even fully understood the ferocity of her feelings for the Northuldran, Elsa had once admitted to her noaide something she always knew to be true.
She had very little left to fear in her life so long as Honeymaren was a part of it.
Honeymaren pulled away slowly to gaze searchingly into Elsa's, her thumbs brushing against her cheeks slowly as she did before she stepped out of her arms. "The lonely, scared girl who went through all of this?" Honeymaren began, gesturing around the broken room as she backed away several steps. "That girl is gone." Honeymaren crossed her arms over her chest and leaned against the icy wall, propping one foot up behind her as she flashed the queen an encouraging grin. "Show me the woman she grew into." A smile slowly began to grow on Elsa's face as she took in the utter confidence on her lover's face. It grew even brighter as she looked down at her hands and saw the soft, tell-tale blue glow on her hands, feeling her power rolling beneath her skin like a raging river. With one last encouraging nod from the noiade, Elsa went to work.
Elsa danced about the room as her magic flowed around her. Broken shards of ice floated from the ground and disappeared in a flurry, joining the new magic as it flew from Elsa's fingertips. A new chandelier made from thousands of icy diamonds containing the symbols of the spirits of the forest blossomed from the ceiling like a crocus from the snow. What was once a small balcony overlooking the world below now took up half of the wall, allowing the bright reds and oranges of the sunset to flood the once dark, closed-off room with their healing light. The railing of the balcony looked like chains of leaves flowing on a breeze, much like their engagement rings and Honeymaren couldn't help but smile at that. Finally, against the wall near the balcony, Elsa crafted her final touch.
A large, four-poster bed that looked as soft and inviting as fresh snow, hidden away by an icy, gossamer-like canopy.
Elsa panted lightly as she watched Honeymaren take in the sight of the room, blushing as she fingered the fabric on the bed and those chocolate eyes flicked toward the magical queen with an unreadable look before walking toward her. Elsa gave her a playful little smile and backed away slowly before turning and sauntering away, leading Honeymaren out onto the new balcony. She leaned up against the railing and gazed out across the last rays of the setting sun, smiling when she felt warm arms slowly snake around her waist and her lover's lithe body press up against her. Honeymaren rested her chin on Elsa's shoulder, closing her eyes as she buried her face into waves of white-gold and inhaled deeply. "How did that feel, Snowflake?" she asked quietly, relishing the soothing feel of the winter spirit safe and content in her embrace.
Elsa pondered the question for a moment, her hands coming to rest on the ones about her waist as she leaned into the protective warmth behind her. "It felt similar to the first time, but different. It felt like freedom...but of a different kind." Honeymaren opened her eyes, regarding the queen curiously. Elsa smiled and turned in the embrace, resting her head on her noaide's shoulder and tucking her arms between their chests. She closed her eyes and sighed deeply in contentment. She loved when Honeymaren held her like this – loved the feeling of being completely wrapped up in a loving, protective embrace where she didn't have to pretend to be brave or strong, where she was utterly taken care of and cared for. She could simply...be. Honeymaren was the only person in the world that could make her feel like this.
"When I first made this place, I felt the freedom to exist," she clarified, splaying one hand over Honeymaren's chest to feel the strong, comforting rhythm of her heart beneath her searching fingertips. "Now...I feel free to be me...to be happy...to have wants and needs and emotions without compromise, because I know you will be there to love me through it all," she finished quietly. "I love you, Honeymaren." The dark-haired woman smiled and pressed a kiss to Elsa's forehead before resting her head against hers. "I love you, Elsa," she murmured softly in reply. Elsa opened her eyes and smiled up at her adoringly before placing a sweet kiss on her cheek and laying her head on her shoulder again, snuggling in closer to her.
They stood there for a long while lost in their own thoughts as the last remnants of the day quickly faded into night, the stars shining brightly in the clear, cloudless sky. Honeymaren stared up in wonder at the vastness of it – it felt like they were so high up that she might be able to reach out and touch them. She may have tried, had she not had everything she'd ever wanted already wrapped up in her arms. As she stargazed, she slipped her hand under Elsa's icy shirt and began to trace small, nonsensical shapes on the soft skin at the base of the queen's spine, eliciting a quiet sigh of content from the blonde. "That feels nice," she murmured, closing her eyes once more.
Honeymaren smiled down at her adoringly and her hand began to glow a soft pink, warming with her magic. She slowly waved it over the queen's lower back, melting away a large portion of her shirt and leaving the pale skin exposed before pressing her warm hand flat against the small of her back. Elsa groaned softly at the pleasant feeling, a small chuckle following close behind. "You think you're hot stuff now that you've got fire powers, hm? That you can just melt my clothes away whenever you want?" Honeymaren smirked and pushed more warmth through her hand and began to rub her fingers in small, firm circles. She grinned when Elsa leaned into her heavily and wrapped her arms around her neck to steady herself, another pleased groan escaping her as Honeymaren kneaded the muscles in her lower back. "Is that you complaining?" she asked teasingly. She could feel the queen's smirk against her neck. "Why should I complain if a beautiful woman wants to rub my back?"
Honeymaren simply chuckled in reply and began to run both hands up and down Elsa's lower back until her entire back was exposed, pale skin glowing ethereally in the moonlight. She slowly ran the warmed flat of her hands up and down the soft skin and Elsa sighed deeply, letting the combination of her love's embrace and the magical warmth ease all the tension from her body. Honeymaren stared down in wonder at the flawless expanse of pale, creamy skin beneath her fingers and began to trace the contours of Elsa's spine with her fingertips. Her fingers slowly followed the elegant curve from full hips to a trim, dainty waist and up the blonde's sensitive ribs, smiling when Elsa arched her chest into her in response. Over and over her fingers traveled the beautiful paths that were known only to her as she lovingly worshipped her goddess of ice and snow, the queen's breath beginning to quicken. "You're so beautiful, Elsa," she whispered quietly to her.
Elsa gasped softly when Honeymaren's fingers brushed against her ribs again, tilting her head to place slow, open-mouthed kisses against her lover's throat. She buried one hand in thick waves of dark silk and pulled her closer, moaning softly when Honeymaren's wandering fingers dug possessively into her hips. Elsa's breathing began to dissolve into short, quick pants as her body responded to every brush, caress, and twitch of her lover's fingers as they reacquainted themselves with what was rightfully theirs. The queen bit her lip to stifle her quiet keening, letting her noaide explore as she wished. Her knees wavered and threatened to buckle when Honeymaren's lips found the sensitive skin of her neck. She instinctively tilted her head to the side, submissively exposing more of her neck and throat to the dark-haired woman. "Maren," she gasped out softly when full lips found her pulse point and sucked sharply, sending a jolt straight through her core.
Finally, the queen couldn't stand it any longer and pulled back just enough to kiss Honeymaren fiercely, using the hand tangled in her hair to hold her close. Honeymaren instantly deepened the kiss, slipping her tongue between Elsa's lips as she pulled her close, her fingers digging into the queen's hips as she did. Finally, Elsa pulled away to gasp for breath, placing her lips against Honeymaren's ear. "Please," she whispered huskily. "Take me to bed..." The noaide groaned softly and instantly captured the queen's lips in a firm, possessive kiss, reaching down to lift the dainty blonde by the back of her thighs. Elsa instinctively wrapped her arms and legs around Honeymaren as she was swiftly carried to the icy structure and lain gingerly on its soft surface, feeling as though she were lying in a snowdrift. Her lover's familiar, comforting weight immediately settled above her, never once breaking their kiss.
Elsa's skillful hands reached down and tugged sharply at the knotted leather of Honeymaren's belt, her breathing becoming ragged as her noaide kissed her senseless, swallowing the queen's moan when the dark-haired woman's thigh pressed firmly between her legs. The sound of leather slapping against itself echoed against the icy walls as Elsa's nimble fingers finally managed to undo Honeymaren's belt, ripping it away and throwing it carelessly to the side of the bed before grasping at her tunic and tugging insistently at it. Finally, she managed to gather enough of it in her hands that she could pull the garment up over her noaide's head, forcing them to break apart for a split second. The moment it cleared her head, Honeymaren's lips immediately found Elsa's throat, nipping and sucking sharply and marking the queen as hers. Elsa arched up into her lover with a sharp gasp, reaching down and grabbing fistfuls of Honeymaren's shirt, tugging it loose from her form-fitting breeches, whining a bit when her frenzied hands got a bit tangled in the flowing fabric. Honeymaren laughed, smiling against the queen's skin. "You are impatient, Your Majesty," she husked out against her throat before she sat up on her knees, straddling the queen's hips as she pulled the loose material over her head, leaving her torso bare to Elsa's hungry gaze.
Elsa's eyes raked appreciatively over her noaide's toned form before something caught her eye. She sat up slowly, cool fingers reaching out to delicately brush against a large, angry-looking scar on Honeymaren's chest near her left shoulder. Blue eyes widened for a moment in recognition before her face fell, her eyes squeezing tightly shut as the image of the barbed crossbow bolt that caused the scar burying itself in her lover assaulted her mind. Honeymaren tensed, her own eyes squeezing shut for a different reason as the same memory returning made it feel as though her skull were splitting in two. The noaide forced the pain from the forefront of her mind, reaching out to run her fingers soothingly through Elsa's hair. "Hey," she murmured gently, drawing the queen's tearful gaze back up to hers. "I'm okay, Snowflake. Everything's alright," she said in a low voice, smiling reassuringly at the blonde. Honeymaren cupped the blonde's face gently in her hands, her thumbs brushing away the few stray tears that had managed to fall. Elsa sniffled quietly, sad eyes flicking from the scar to Honeymaren's eyes a few times before resting her hands on her lover's wrists. "Does it hurt?" she managed to ask in a shaky voice. Honeymaren smiled adoringly and shook her head. "No, my love. It doesn't hurt."
Elsa's gaze dropped to the scar once more, staring at it for a long moment before she leaned forward and pressed her lips gingerly to the marred flesh. Honeymaren shivered slightly at the sensation, closing her eyes and brushing her fingers through Elsa's hair lovingly. The queen dropped her hands to rest on Honeymaren's hips as she took her time brushing her lips lovingly against the raised skin, covering the entire surface of the scar in the softest kisses Honeymaren had ever felt. "Thank you, Honeymaren," she whispered against her skin, lifting her eyes to stare adoringly up at her noaide. "Thank you for saving my life..." Honeymaren smiled warmly and leaned in to touch her forehead to Elsa's tenderly. "Thank you for being the reason for mine," she whispered back before she pressed her lips softly against Elsa's, guiding her to lie back once more. Elsa wrapped her arms around her lover's neck, dissipating the rest of her icy outfit without a second thought, releasing her only long enough for the dark-haired woman to peel off her breeches before settling above her once more. There would be no teasing or playful fighting with fabric this night – this night was for pure love, for reconnecting with the lost half of her soul, and to ensure she would never be taken from her again.
Their kisses and caresses remained slow and loving for a long time, their passion simmering and building below the surface as they savored the miracle of their reunion. Elsa could have stayed lost in those moments forever and been happy for the rest of her life. The queen's skin absolutely glowed in the moonlight that poured in from the wide balcony and more than once, Honeymaren found herself staring down at her in breathless awe. She slowly traced her fingertips down Elsa's body, mesmerized by the beautiful contrast of their skin when the queen would arch into her touch. Honeymaren pulled back slightly to stare into the arctic gaze beneath her, crystalline pools filled with love and longing for her and her alone. The moon and the stars shone brightly upon the lovers but compared to Elsa's eyes, nothing shone quite as brilliantly. The endlessly deep blue pools had their own vocabulary – and, oh, what a beautiful language it was to learn. Honeymaren could live the rest of her life in the mists and never be found wanting, for through the queen's eyes she could see the starlight in her very soul.
"What are you thinking?"
Honeymaren blinked, startled from her reverie as she realized she must have been staring. She bit back the instinctive apology on her lips when she saw the patient, adoring smile on the blonde's as Elsa reached up and brushed the back of her fingers against Honeymaren's cheek. "What are you thinking to look at me in such a way?" Elsa asked again. Honeymaren smiled lovingly at her, capturing Elsa's hand in her own and planting a slow kiss to the center of her palm before doing the same to each fingertip. "What way is that, my love?" she murmured against the pads of the queen's fingers. Elsa sighed softly at the loving touch and closed her eyes as it moved to the sensitive, vulnerable skin of her wrist and inside her forearm. "The way that makes my heart feel like it's going to burst. Like you're looking at me for the first time, as though you've never seen me before, yet somehow know me more completely than I know myself."
Honeymaren smiled against Elsa's skin, lacing her fingers with the queen's and dipping her head to trace her collarbone with her lips, murmuring softly to her as she went. "I'm thinking that there is so much more to you than anyone else can see...that there are more wonders in this world than I've ever dared to dream." Honeymaren glanced up when she felt the queen's eyes on her once more and smiled lovingly. "And how amazing it is to see all of them in the stardust of your eyes." Elsa stared down at her in wonder, her eyes shining with unshed tears - tears that finally fell when the queen closed her eyes as Honeymaren leaned up to kiss her passionately, pressing her thigh firmly between the blonde's legs. The queen moaned softly and rocked her hips needily against Honeymaren's thigh, even as the noaide's hand trailed down to cup her gently.
Honeymaren broke the kiss with a soft gasp, lowering her head to nuzzle Elsa's cheek lovingly as her fingers parted the queen's need, dipping into the slick warmth there. "Are you ready?" she whispered huskily in her ear, her fingers already massaging the over-sensitive bundle of nerves that sent bolts of lightning through Elsa's entire body. "Gods, yes," she whimpered, cradling Honeymaren's head against hers and tangling her fingers in her hair, her legs instinctively parting wider for her lover. Elsa moaned loudly when Honeymaren slowly pushed one finger inside of her, her head falling back against the pillow as she arched into the touch.
The noaide buried her face against Elsa's neck to hide her grimace as pain instantly shot through her head, as though she had run headfirst into a stone wall – like there was a hard, unforgiving boundary somewhere in the recesses of her mind that her consciousness threw itself at over and over as memory after memory flashed before her.
Elsa crying out in pleasure.
SLAM.
Elsa riding a wave of ecstasy for the first time.
SLAM.
Elsa begging Honeymaren to claim her.
SLAM.
Elsa's virginal walls clamping down on her fingers.
SLAM.
She grit her teeth as an agonized tear leaked from the corner of her eye, disappearing against the icy pillow, trying desperately to focus on the beautiful goddess writhing in ecstasy beneath her. Her lips found the sensitive skin of Elsa's neck, biting down gently before soothing it with her tongue. She forced a second finger deep inside the blonde's dripping sex and was rewarded with a loud moan of pleasure from the queen as it stretched her tight, untouched walls. Her fingers moved faster and harder, desperate for her love's cries of pleasure to drown out the pain in her head.
Elsa moaned breathlessly, her fingernails digging into the soft skin of her noaide's back as she clung to her desperately to ground herself. She sobbed in ecstasy as her lover pushed ever deeper inside of her and she began to lose herself to the pleasure. Instinct took over as she bucked her hips against Honeymaren's hand, losing both rational thought and control as she neared that wonderful peak when it happened. She whimpered and closed her eyes when his face flashed before her.
No. She was safe. She was with Honeymaren.
The weight above her became less comforting and more restricting. Elsa clung even tighter. She was safe.
"You're mine," she heard in her mind with a particularly deep, powerful thrust. It wasn't Honeymaren's voice. She whimpered again, her arms wrapping around Honeymaren's neck and hugging her tightly, her eyes stinging with tears. When had she started crying? She held on even tighter, suddenly wishing it would be over soon.
And then it was.
"Shhh, shh, shh...it's alright," came Honeymaren's soothing voice next to her ear, the dark-haired woman gently nuzzling her. Her fingers were still buried deep within the blonde, but had stilled all movement. "You're safe, Elsa," she whispered. "We're stopping." Elsa shook her head vehemently, reaching down to try to prevent Honeymaren's hand from leaving her, but it was too late. "Please, don't," Elsa whimpered, looking desperately into Honeymaren's eyes that now shone with sadness. "I'm sorry, I can do this, I promise-"
"Elsa, stop!"
Honeymaren's voice was sharp, her eyes hard despite the concern and love in them and it instantly silenced the queen. Chocolate eyes flecked with twilight immediately softened as Elsa's face fell and she sighed, closing her eyes to calm her own emotions and leaning up to place a long, reassuring kiss to her forehead. When she opened them again, she stared into lost blue eyes that more closely resembled a rough, stormy sea than the sparkling starlight she had seen only minutes ago. "Elsa..." she began, her hand reaching up to tuck a lock of white-gold behind her ear. "I can't do this. I can't put you through that..." she admitted, shaking her head. "I'd rather lose my memories than give you one where you feared my touch..." Elsa squeezed her eyes shut against the tears that began to build, placing her hand over Honeymaren's and pressing it to her cheek. "Can't you see that's why I need this?"
Elsa opened her eyes to stare imploringly at her lover, allowing the tears to fall freely as she choked back a sob. "I can feel his hands, his body, his lips on me...all the time," she cried brokenly, closing her eyes tightly once more and pressing her face desperately against the hand on her cheek. Honeymaren listened quietly, gently brushing the fingers of her other hand through the queen's hair. It was clear to the noiade that this was something Elsa had been holding in for a long time turning to gall in her soul that she desperately needed to get out. "I feel them ghosting over me in my waking hours and claiming me at night, haunting me when it should be you. It should be your hands, your body, your lips I feel because I belong to you not him!" she sobbed, impossibly blue eyes begging her to understand.
'So there it is,' Honeymaren thought to herself. That was the source of the deep guilt she sensed from Elsa on Ahtohallan – the thought that her inability to rid herself of her fears and traumatic memories meant that it lessened her connection, her loyalty, her worth to Honeymaren. The dark-haired woman bit her lip to prevent her own tears from falling as that reality sank in. For Elsa to ever think that she was less than, especially because of such a horrible experience cut Honeymaren to her very soul. "What do you need from me, Elsa?" she asked gently, using the hand Elsa held to her cheek to guide the blonde to face her, wiping the tears away with her thumb. The queen stared into the gentle, loving eyes of the woman she loved most in the world before she had to close her own, the empathy in them too much for her to bear. "I-I need you to love me even though I'm broken," she whispered hoarsely. "I need you to cleanse my soul of his touch until all I can feel is you and your love. I..." she trailed off, biting her lip to try to regain control of her emotions. Though Honeymaren wanted desperately to comfort her, she waited patiently for Elsa to finish. Finally, the queen was able to take a shaky breath and look up into Honeymaren's eyes pleadingly as her voice was reduced to a broken whisper. "Just...love me until I'm me again..."
Honeymaren leaned down to feather soft kisses first along Elsa's furrowed brow, then her eyes, and down to the dainty upturn of her nose, murmuring softly to her as she went. "Sweet spirit...there will never be a moment that I don't love you and everything that you are, good or bad, broken or whole," she began, continuing to trail delicate kisses across the queen's face, bidding her to calm. "Nothing you or anyone else can do will ever change that, Snowflake. Look at me," she ordered gently, brushing the back of her fingers against Elsa's cheek as desperate blue pools locked onto her. "You're mine, Elsa. Not because you belong to me, but because you gave yourself to me. Elsa, you don't belong to anyone but yourself...and only you decide who deserves a place in your heart and your mind," she said earnestly, willing the queen to understand.
Honeymaren smiled warmly at her, a hint of playfulness in her voice. "Now, you gave yourself to me, my goddess of winter...and there are no take-backs. Surely your sister has taught you this lesson with chocolate at some point." Elsa couldn't help the watery chuckle that escaped her, which made Honeymaren's smile turn into a slight grin before she bumped her forehead playfully against the queen's. "Hey," she said in a lower, more heartfelt tone that brought Elsa's gaze back to her. "You're mine," she reaffirmed for the queen, who nodded quickly in agreement. "And I won't let anything or anyone take you from me. I will hold you safe in my heart and my arms until the stars themselves burn out, because my love is as everlasting and dedicated as the bird on the diamond mountain." The anecdote made Elsa smile a little, already feeling herself growing calmer at the sound of her lover's voice. "What is the bird on the diamond mountain?"
Honeymaren smiled and sat back before scooching up to sit with her back against the headboard, her legs stretched out in front of her and crossed at the ankles. "Come," she beckoned to the queen, patting her lap expectantly. Elsa blinked and sat up slowly, eyeing Honeymaren uncertainly. Honeymaren only grinned and reached out to grab the queen, eliciting a tiny yelp and even a bit of a giggle as she was pulled over to straddle her lover's lap. The noaide pulled Elsa flush against her and the queen gasped quietly at the contact. Honeymaren smiled warmly and reached up to wipe the drying tears from her beloved's face, placing a loving kiss on each cheek before she spoke.
"My people have a legend about time," she began as she laced her fingers with Elsa's, playing with them idly while the queen watched. "A great king heard of the power of the spirits and came to Noaide, seeking the truths of the world. He asked Noaide, 'How many seconds are in eternity?'. Noaide replied, 'There is a mountain of pure diamond. It takes an hour to climb it and an hour to go around it. Every hundred years, a little bird comes and sharpens its beak on the diamond mountain. When the entire mountain is chiseled away, the first second of eternity will have passed.' Now, most people take this as a lesson of how insignificant the time we spend on this earth is in the grand design of things, but me, personally?" Honeymaren grinned. "I think that's one hell of a bird." Elsa smiled adoringly at her noaide, reaching up to rest her arms on her shoulders and touching her forehead to hers. "I love your stories," she said quietly. Honeymaren smiled and ran one warm fingertip up the queen's sensitive spine, causing her to arch forward with a surprised gasp. "Do you know why I am like the bird in that story?" she asked in a low voice, placing a hand on either side of the blonde's ribcage and slowly dragging her fingernails down to her waist. Elsa swallowed thickly and shook her head in reply, closing her eyes as her body shivered at her lover's teasing touch. "Because," she elaborated as her fingertips continued to tease the blonde. "I will spend all of eternity showing you how much I love you over and over again until you finally believe me. And the moment you do, when that diamond mountain is finally chiseled away...I'll still have the rest of eternity to look forward to loving you," she whispered, leaning up and capturing Elsa's lips in a deep, passionate kiss. The queen melted against her instantly, wrapping her arms around her neck and pulling her as close as she could.
When they finally broke apart for breath, Honeymaren pressed her forehead against Elsa's, both women's breath coming in quick, short pants. "We can try again," Honeymaren breathed. "But I want you to be in complete control and I want your word that you will let me know the moment something doesn't feel right so we can slow down." Elsa nodded fervently and immediately leaned in to kiss Honeymaren once more, blinking in surprise when her lips were met with fingers. Hungry blue eyes flicked up to serious chocolate in askance. "This is important, Elsa," she said quietly. "Promise me you won't just try to barrel through this...that you'll let me help you." Honeymaren felt Elsa's adoring smile grow beneath her fingertips before the queen grasped her hand with her own, pulling it from her lips and pressing them lightly against Honeymaren's in a brief, sweet kiss. "I promise, love," she whispered sincerely, allowing the noaide to search her gaze to her satisfaction and smiling when it was Honeymaren that could not stop herself from kissing the queen once more.
Though they began slowly, it didn't take long at all for the flame of their earlier passion to blaze to life once again and for Honeymaren's nerves to start making themselves hard to ignore, for she had realized a crucial truth she hadn't revealed to the queen. Since the first occurrence in the snow before they entered the ice castle, when they realized what new kind of pain Ahtohallan had predicted Elsa to face, something hadn't made sense to Honeymaren. Honeymaren's pain was entirely physical, and physical pain was anything but new to her. Hell, she had been shot by an arrow and burned by the flames of a funeral pyre – the Northuldran was well acquainted with multiple levels of physical pain. It wasn't until Elsa's desperate pleas to continue to love her that Honeymaren realized what kind of pain she wasn't prepared for.
Allowing Elsa to be in pain.
Despite the promise she had demanded of her, Honeymaren knew this was a battle within Elsa's heart and soul that only the queen could truly fight. She knew at some point, she would have to let the blonde push herself through the pain and the trauma that was likely to overtake her. Not only that, but Honeymaren herself would be the catalyst for it. That didn't mean she wouldn't do everything she could to make it easier for the woman she loved, though. She pulled back from their increasingly heated kissing for a moment, unable to help smiling at the impatient whine that the action drew from the queen. "Hold on, Snowflake," she murmured, giving her a quick, apologetic kiss. "I want to try something."
Honeymaren closed her eyes for a moment in concentration, holding one hand palm up with fingers splayed over the side of the bed. Elsa watched, entranced, as her lover's palm glowed a warm pinkish-purple, gasping softly when Honeymaren's eyes opened to reveal the same color swirling in the soft chocolate. Honeymaren turned her eyes toward the ceiling and closed her hand in a fist before flicking her fingers outward once more. She did this several more times and Elsa tilted her head in confusion as over and over, nothing appeared in her lover's palm as she expected it to. Just as she was about to ask what she was doing, she realized the colors in the room around her were changing – the cold, stark white of the moonlight on her ice was becoming warmer, softer, and more welcoming. She followed Honeymaren's gaze to the ceiling and gasped at what she saw.
Dozens of small flames were floating all around them, glowing all sorts of colors from soft oranges and reds to ethereal pinks and purples, a new flame materializing in thin air every time her lover flicked her fingers. "Maren..." she breathed with wonder as she gazed in awe at the beauty of Honeymaren's magic. She smiled brightly at the beauty around her when suddenly her lover's hand, still glowing with her magic, pressed against her most intimate area, two impossibly warm fingers sliding deep inside of her without warning. "MAREN!" Elsa's eyes went wide in surprise and she cried out in pleasure, her hands flying out in front of her and catching herself on the headboard as she pitched forward in surprise. She closed her eyes at the glorious sensation - it was like nothing she had ever felt before, this delicious heat inside of her that made her feel utterly complete. "Open your eyes, Elsa," Honeymaren ordered gently, keeping her fingers very still inside the blonde, even as the queen's tight walls gripped at them needily. When Elsa forced her eyes open, Honeymaren smiled at her lovingly. "Try to keep your eyes open, baby. Remember, you are in control, but never lose focus that it is me you are with and the magic that surrounds you...because you are always safe with me. Okay?"
When Elsa nodded hurriedly in understanding, Honeymaren leaned up to kiss her as she began to very slowly pump her fingers in and out of the queen, swallowing every whimper and moan that escaped her. Elsa pulled away from the kiss with a sharp cry of pleasure when her noaide's fingers curled slightly, brushing that magical spot that made her see stars. Her own fingers gripped the headboard tightly as her hips began to move on their own, rolling and bucking needily against Honeymaren's hand to force that wonderful heat deeper inside of her. "F-Faster...please, Gods, faster..." she panted as she leaned forward on her knees for better leverage and gasping when her lover eagerly complied with her plea. Honeymaren placed feverish kisses across Elsa's chest, her lips finding their way to one hard, pert nipple and immediately lavishing it with her tongue, eliciting a needy whimper from the blonde. Elsa closed her eyes in rapture, her hair falling around both women's faces like a satin curtain hiding them from the world as her head fell forward heavily. The fingers on Honeymaren's free hand dug pleasurably into her hips as they rocked together, helping to keep her steady.
"This is how I've always dreamed of having you. At the mercy of my every will, as you always were meant to be."
Elsa whimpered slightly, biting her lip. No. She refused. She wouldn't let that bastard win.
His smug, evil smile flashed in her mind.
"I told you years ago that you would belong to me, Elsa."
She could feel his poisonous touch on her chest and she forced her eyes open with a gasp, looking down to find her noaide, not Ulrik lavishing her with her tongue. "Maren..." she whimpered quietly, barely loud enough for Honeymaren to hear. Chocolate eyes immediately looked up and saw the fear beginning to swirl in passion-darkened blue pools and she slowed the movement of her fingers, wrapping her other arms around Elsa's waist to slow her down as well. "It's okay," she murmured, leaning up to kiss the panting queen softly. "It's okay, Elsa. I've got you," she whispered as she kissed her again and again. Throughout it all, she never ceased the slow pump of her fingers, steadily letting the pleasure continue to build in her lover. She pushed just a little more of her magic through her fingers, eliciting a deep moan from the queen. "Oh, Gods, whatever you're doing, please don't stop," she begged, wrapping her arms around Honeymaren's neck and holding her close.
Honeymaren pulled back just enough to look at Elsa's face, a ray of hope shining in her eyes as she saw the unbridled pleasure on her beautiful features. "Does that feel good, Elsa?" Elsa nodded quickly, letting her forehead drop to her lover's shoulder. Honeymaren carefully pushed a bit more of her magic into her hand and blinked in disbelief when she was immediately rewarded with another throaty moan from the queen.
Could this really be the answer?
A sense of relief washed over Honeymaren as she began to move her hand a bit faster and released another wave of her magic through her fingers, grinning when Elsa's hands grasped desperately at her shoulders, her hips rolling against her and forcing them deeper. Every bit of magic she diverted to her hand not only heightened the queen's pleasure, but lessened the agony in her head. Had this been what they were meant to do all along? Somehow, it felt right that this is how it was meant to be – only by healing one another could they begin to heal themselves. Suddenly the barrier in Honeymaren's mind was no longer impenetrable. All that stood between her and a long, full life with her goddess was abruptly surmountable. It was flawed. It was vulnerable.
It was coming down.
Elsa screamed her name as Honeymaren redoubled her efforts, the cries of the queen's pleasure echoing across the icy room again and again as she poured more and more of her magic into their bond. Finally, her goddess of winter sobbed not in sorrow, but in ecstasy, her hips bucking wildly against her lover as she sped toward the edge of oblivion. She could feel Elsa's walls begin to pulse around her fingers on the edge of climax when her magic suddenly began to respond of its own volition. Rather than pushing her magic into her hand, it seemed as though her hand was drawing the magic into itself. Or...
It was Elsa drawing the magic into herself.
"Elsa...are you doing this?" she asked, pulling back just enough to look at the keening queen, but Elsa was beyond being capable of responding. When she began to slow the movement of her hand, Elsa's wound their way into Honeymaren's hair and tightened in a vague warning. "Don't you dare fucking stop," she nearly growled against her throat. Elsa pulled back to look into Honeymaren's eyes, a challenging fire dancing in them. She slowed the movement of her hips, prolonging her release just enough to speak coherently. "Who...do I belong to...noaide?" Honeymaren's eyes widened slightly before a slow smirk tugged at her lips. "Me," she answered confidently, curling her fingers as she said it. A sharp cry of pleasure and the sexiest smile she had ever seen was her well-deserved reward as Elsa pressed herself closer against Honeymaren, cupping her face in her hands and brushing her lips teasingly against hers. "Then take back what is yours, my love," she whispered before fiercely claiming the full lips that belonged to the queen and the queen alone.
All lingering doubt banished from her mind, Honeymaren picked up the pace once again, her fingers pumping feverishly in and out of the writhing goddess again and again as she felt magic being pulled from her. With one final curl of her fingers, Elsa came undone, her entire body locking in ecstasy as she rode wave after glorious wave of pleasure the likes of which she had never experienced. Her womb was flooded with the inexplicable warmth of her lover's power, pooling inside of her like a hot spring of euphoria and keeping her riding the edge of oblivion beyond what she thought possible.
Finally, Elsa collapsed into Honeymaren's waiting arms, shaking uncontrollably from the intensity of what she had just experienced as the dark-haired woman pressed loving kisses to every inch of skin her lips could reach. Honeymaren kept her fingers buried deeply inside the blonde, the queen's still spasming walls gripping them tightly. "That was incredible," Honeymaren breathed against Elsa's neck, causing the shaking woman to chuckle breathlessly. "I'm pretty sure...that's my line..." she panted, a tired but sated and happy grin on her face. Elsa gathered as much strength as she could to lift her head from her lover's shoulder before she gasped softly, tucking Honeymaren's hair behind her ear. "You're bleeding again," the queen whimpered, conjuring an icy cloth to gently wipe away the blood. "Does it hurt?" Honeymaren smiled and reached her free hand around to grasp Elsa's fretting one, shaking her head. "No, my love. It's all gone, I swear. You took it all away," she answered. Elsa blinked in confusion. "Me? I did? How? When?"
Instead of answering, Honeymaren grinned and pressed her fingers deeper inside the blonde, eliciting a surprised, gasping moan from the winter spirit who immediately rolled her hips forward. "I don't know and I don't care. Because there is only one thing in this entire universe that holds any meaning to me right now. Do you know what that is?" she asked, punctuating her question by beginning to slowly, firmly stroke her fingers in and out of the already gasping queen. "W-What?" Elsa managed to gasp out, threading her fingers through her lover's thick, dark locks. Honeymaren grinned broadly at her, leaning up to brush her lips against the slightly open, panting fullness of Elsa's before whispering a single word against them.
"You."
As the queen suddenly found herself flipped onto her back on the mattress and pinned beneath the newly reborn fire spirit, Elsa knew only two things. One was that the love of her life, the other half of her soul, and her reason for living had just decided that the queen was in for a very long, very intense night.
And two?
She was going to love every damn second of it.
AN:
Holy crap that was a long chapter. Also, the bird and diamond mountain is a story from Peter Capaldi's Doctor Who and I LOVE him!
Writing this chapter took a lot out of me personally, mentally and emotionally; though I'm sure a lot of it is due to closing on/moving into a new house in the middle of a pandemic -_-
Which means, sadly, that the next chapter is going to take a little while, so hopefully this super long one tides you guys over for a bit.
Stay safe, my friends! As always, fuel my soul with reviews and it will spur me on to write faster! Also, still looking for one-shot requests!
-Volchise