It was an average day in Splatoon City. There were birds flying an shit. Everyone was happy and whatnot. Just like every average day, the Anarchy Splatcast started broadcasting as usual.
The logo of the anarchy Splatcat flashed on the screen, and Shiver began to say their intro, "Repping the Splatlands, we are DEEP CU-"
Suddenly, a camel bone arrow pierced her neck and obliterated her throat and vocal chords. A large man clad in heavy mongolian lamellar iron armor lowered his bow. He had a cool ass beard and a well decorated iron helmet. That's right, it was Genghis Khan, back from the dead.
"ᠪᠢ ᠠᠮᠢᠳᠤᠷᠠᠭᠰᠠᠨ᠂ ᠭᠢᠴᠢᠢ ᠮᠢᠨᠢ", he said, which Shiver, Frye, and Big Man didn't understand because they didn't speak Mongolian.
He slowly walked over to Shiver, who was bleeding out and couldn't speak, not just because her vocal chords were severed, but out of pure fear too. He unsheathed his ornate Turko-Mongol Saber, an essential weapon of any warrior of the horde, specially crafted by the greatest Blacksmith in Southern Yuan Dynasty China, engraved with special Tengrist seals.
Frye and Big Man watched as he raised the blade into the air, then powerfully thrust it back downwards, cutting Shiver in half and INSTANTLY killing her. The two halves of her body lay upon the floor, eviscerated.
Frye looked down in horror, "What the fuck…. Oh my god, Holy fuck…."
Big Man looked towards the camera, still live broadcasting to the whole city, "Ay ay ay! Ay! (WOWIE! That was freaking scary and wacky! This is one heck of a crazy moment in Splatoon 3!)"
Genghis Khan then turned his attention to Frye, who was still weeping over the loss of her best friend.
"Oh my fucking god… Why.. Why the fuck would you do this.. Who the fuck are you even.. Why did you have to do this.. Oh my fuck…"
Genghis Khan just laughed heartily. She continued to cry in her fictional squid fashion.
Genghis Khan reached over and grabbed her throat with one hand. He raised his arm, lifting her feet off the floor as she struggled to break free from his grasp. He put his other hand on top of her head and gripped it tightly, then proceeded to pull until her head came off. Frye from the Anarchy Splatcast was no more. She got fuckin MURDERED by the badass founder of the Mongol Empire.
Suddenly, the door to the studio burst open, "FREEZE, SQUID POLICE BITCH!"
The awesome Genghis Khan dispatched each officer with skillfully thrown hatchets in a matter of seconds. The marine animal-people of Splatoon world were absolutely powerless to stop him.
NEXT TIME: Genghis Khan brutally executes Off the Hook