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Anna Westbrook v. Two Confrontations

"I know all your favourite things, Anna. I keep lists of them. I went through your garbage to find the things you don't like, too. So many greasy pizza boxes. Not a scrap of pineapple on the cardboard. Do you not like it, or do you like it so much you lick the boxes clean?"

Exhibit number 53: excerpt from a letter sent from the defendant, Noah Hall, to Anna Westbrook's previous address.

-o-

"You know, you really should eat a proper breakfast."

Anna blinked, eyes following the spinning plate in the microwave. It took her a moment to register her sister's comment, too focused on the melodic hum of the appliance. She turned and looked over the white kitchen island at her sister.

Melissa sat at the dining table, already dressed head-to-toe in waterproof athletic wear. Her orange hair was tied up with a red scrunchie that looked awfully familiar. In front of her, two perfectly toasted and buttered slices of bread sat beside a mound of scrambled eggs, only slightly rubbery. She was getting better at cooking, but she was still too skinny in her opinion.

"There's nothing wrong with leftovers," Anna said.

"You've eaten reheated pizza every meal for the last three days," she said.

Her sister had a point. Anna knew she was worried about her. Over the last few years, she'd gained some habits that she couldn't exactly call healthy. She ordered out for most of her meals. Even if she was ordering something from the corner shop, she wouldn't walk over it to pick it up. Slowly, she replaced her eight glasses of water with three or four cans of caffeinated and sugar-dense energy drinks. She stopped going on morning runs, stopped swimming, stopped going on nature walks with her sister. She slept too late, woke too early. Spent hours staring at glowing blue screens. Half of her wardrobe no longer fit her, spending their days tucked away in the dark recesses of her closet next to her old softball bat. In high school, she was a star athlete. Once, she could run marathons. Now she ran out of breath climbing the two flights of stairs from the front door to her bedroom. She'd become a social recluse, never talking to anyone but her sister and an anonymous crowd on the other side of a camera.

"You're right," she said. "Let's make dinner together tonight. Something healthy."

Just then, the microwave dinged. She took her plate of leftovers out and walked over to the living room. She perched on the couch, tucked her legs under her and peered out the front window, extending her neck to get a better angle of the street below. The second floor of their unit was open, just one big room. Melissa could see her staring out the front window from her seat at the table.

"What are you up to?"

Anna sat up even taller, shifting her head a little to the right to get a better view. She wanted to catch her neighbours on their way out this morning. She wanted to complain about the noise.

"Nothing," she said, biting into a slice of pizza, half-hot and half-cold.

"You're definitely up to something."

"I'm not."

"You are."

"It's none of your business, Mel."

"You said you'd go hiking with me today," she said. "Whatever you're doing, it's not going to change that, is it?"

Anna turned to look at her sister, and was nearly shattered by the sad look in her eyes. "No, of course not. Just worry about eating your breakfast and making sure you're ready to leave soon."

Melissa sighed, her cheek pressed into her hand. She stabbed at her eggs with her fork.

Anna's heart twinged. Just as she opened her mouth to reassure her further, she glimpsed movement out of the corner of her eye. She whipped her head back around to look out the window.

Her neighbours' old rusty car sat by the curb. The window was down and Rachel was inside the vehicle. Anna could see a third of Paul's bronze face, his body bent over as he leaned forwards and kissed his partner, Rachel, through the window.

"Shoot."

She stood quickly and put her plate on the coffee table. She rushed downstairs, calling out to her sister that she would be back. Without delay, she flung the door open on the bright spring day and rushed outside. Sunshine poured from the sky and directly into her eyes. She squinted against the light. Immediately, she saw that she was too late.

Rachel's car was halfway down the street, and Paul was halfway to the door of his unit. He stopped when he saw her, frowning as he glanced at her. His dark eyes paused at her feet, a judgemental expression sweeping over his face. Anna followed his gaze to her toes.

The sprinklers were on. A puddle had accumulated on the concrete path cutting through the two aisles of plants separating her front door from his driveway, and Anna was standing in it. In her haste, the thought of shoes had slipped her mind. Her socks were soaked through from the sprinklers, and they squelched when she shifted her weight awkwardly.

Slowly, she lifted her head and looked at him. Nothing was said. Still, the sprinklers shot out water. Shh, shh, shh, shh. Water misted over her calves, gathering before running down her ankles in little rivulets.

The corners of her mouth twitched as she attempted a smile. "Good morning."

He raised his eyebrows. "Everything okay?"

"I, um-" She swallowed, nodded. "Yes."

He looked at her oddly. Said nothing, started again for his door.

No. No, Anna needed to talk to him! She couldn't tolerate another night of their inconsiderate behaviour. She racked her brain for what to say. Foolishly, she had run out here without much of a plan at all.

"Um!"

Paul stopped and turned to look at her. Irritation washed over his face. Anna saw it in his mouth, a firm line, and his strong square jaw. All of a sudden, she was a girl in her father's house, quivering, eyes lowered, standing very still so she might become invisible again.

She stared at him, wide-eyed, waiting for him to do something.

Forcibly, he relaxed his face. "Yes?"

Anna swallowed, and reminded herself she was not that terrified little girl anymore. Her father was in jail, and he couldn't hurt her anymore. This was a happy neighbourhood. Safe, nice, friendly. Nobody here was going to hurt her. Nobody here was going to punish her for saying what was on her mind.

She clenched her fists. Steeled herself. Opened her mouth.

"You're too loud," she rushed to say. Her eyes dropped quickly to her wet socks. The puddle of water she stood in caught the sunlight above, disturbed with every spritz from the sprinkler.

"Too loud?"

"At night."

"Too loud at night?"

"When you… you know."

The pause that followed seemed to stretch on forever.

"Anna," he said. "You're Anna, right? Not Melissa?"

She nodded.

"Anna, you're an adult. You can say the word," he said with a breathy chuckle.

Anna swallowed. "I don't know how to say it without…"

"What?"

Without exposing myself, she thought. Talking about sex was difficult for her, and it didn't seem to be for anyone else. People talked about sex all the time, but not Anna.

He sighed. Anna spied him from beneath her lashes.

"Paul, you and your fiancée are too loud when you have sex. Please keep it down. I don't want to hear it," he said. Then, as if conversing with himself: "Of course, thank you for letting me know my behaviour was inconsiderate. We'll try to keep it down in future."

"Thank you." She lifted her head and looked at him.

He looked up at the sky, drawing a deep breath. Then, when he lowered his head again, his shoulders sagged with a long exhale. "Sorry," he said after a moment. "Rachel keeps telling me to be nicer to you and your sister."

"I don't think you're rude," Anna said.

"That's what I told her," he said, "but she thinks I'm scaring everyone off. She wants neighbourhood friends and I'm not being neighbourly. Actually, she wanted to invite you over for a game night."

Anna frowned. "Game night?"

He nodded. "Card games or board games. Whichever you and Melissa prefer. Rachel has a bunch of them."

Oh. That kind of game night. Traditional.

She shifted her weight. "I don't know…"

"Anna, if we're as loud as you claim, you know much more about us than we do you. It would be nice to get to know the family Rachel and I have been terrorising since December. Who knows, maybe you get a wedding invitation out of it. We're planning an open bar," he said with a wink.

"I'll think about it," she said.

Both of them knew what that meant, but Paul was polite enough to smile and nod and go back inside his own unit. Not wanting to look like she stood in that puddle just to struggle to talk to Paul, Anna went to check the mail. Her soggy socks left wet footprints over the concrete up to the letter box, and Anna grimaced at the physical sensation, not unlike walking on two wet sponges.

The mailbox clinked open. Anna peered inside at the dark hollow. She breathed a sigh of relief.

Empty.

-o-

After changing out of her pyjama set and wet socks into a pair of leggings and a tank top, the two girls headed out. Melissa was eager to explore the neighbourhood. She brought her field notebook and a pencil, determined to find something to add to it. Melissa chose an easy hike, one that she had already trekked once without her. Anna was grateful, sweating already under the unfiltered spring sun.

"How are you and Jasper?" Anna asked, following along behind her sister's confident steps. "He's being good to you, right?"

She nodded. "Of course. He still helps me with maths."

"I meant in your relationship," Anna said.

"It's not really a relationship. We're just friends," she said.

"Sure," she said, but a little niggling anxiety lurked in the back of her mind.

Maybe they were friends now, but how long would that last? Even if she didn't understand sexual relationships, Anna wasn't completely oblivious. Melissa had been crushing on Jasper for a while. They went on a bunch of dates, studying and spending time together outdoors. They swapped books. He baked her desserts. What if things between them changed? Her sister wasn't clueless, was she?

Anna realised with horror that she would have to be the one to give her the sex talk. She was entirely unequipped. What if she had questions? What if Anna couldn't answer them because of her lack of sexual desire? She didn't have good experiences, couldn't speak on what sex was meant to be like.

And what if she was worrying about all this too late? What if something had already happened? What if Melissa had been-

"Would you keep up?" Melissa turned and faced her, walking backwards for a few paces as she laughed at her. "You'll get lost out here if you walk so slowly. They'll have to send a rescue party."

Anna quickened her pace. She followed her younger sister along a dirt path, over rocks, up a slight incline. It wasn't long before her breath grew more and more laboured.

Melissa turned again and looked at her, this time with worried eyes. "Do you want to borrow my inhaler?"

She shook her head. "I'm fine."

They continued onwards. Around them, pine trees stretched up towards the sky. Under the tender attention of the recent spring rain, new plants budded and sprouted and crawled over the dirt. Quickly, Melissa found something of interest. She dropped to her knees in the soil and pulled out her notebook, drawing a quick sketch. Anna leant against a tree, rubbing her chest. That sharp pain was back, like a fistful of needles forced between her ribs with the stomping heel of a boot.

Anna frowned at her sister. "He's not done anything weird, has he?"

Melissa didn't take her eyes off the plant. "What?"

"Jasper," she said. "He hasn't made you do anything, right?"

She screwed up her face in disgust and Anna's heart dropped. Her breath stilled. Her wide eyes searched Melissa's profile.

"No," she said. "He's not a dickhead."

Anna's shoulders immediately dropped half an inch away from her ears. "Don't swear."

"He's respectful," Melissa said. "He won't even make out with me. He says he can tell I feel confused about things."

"Confused?"

She nodded, orange hair bobbing up and down. "About us. Jasper and me, I mean. He thinks maybe I'm only attracted to him because of what happened last year. How he came to the house, I mean."

"Oh." The heel of her palm worked over her chest, trying to ease the sharp pain spreading through her torso with each breath. "Maybe you should talk to Dr. Cullen about it in therapy?"

She shook her head quickly. "His mother? Absolutely not."

Anna nodded, kneading her breastbone. She had failed to remember that major detail. "Well, if or when anything does happen, make sure it's because you both want it to, and make sure you stay safe."

Melissa frowned.

Oh God, what kind of sex education was she receiving at school? Now Anna was going to have to explain it all to her: consent, contraceptive methods, STIs, anatomy, physiology-

"I know about sex, Anna. I don't need the talk. Stop freaking out about it." She snapped her notebook shut, stood, and turned to face her. Her eyes bulged. She dropped her pencil. It bounced twice in the dirt.

"Don't litter," Anna scolded.

Melissa ignored her, next to her already. "Sit," she said. "You're so pale."

"It's dirty."

Again, she was ignored. Melissa pressed down on her shoulder, and Anna was forced to lower herself to the earth. Her sister retrieved a bottle of water from her bag and shoved it towards Anna's mouth. She didn't have a choice but to drink, else she would quickly find herself to be soaked. Melissa was talking to her very quickly, some nonsense about a hospital.

"I'm fine," Anna said. She wasn't sick. She just needed to sit for a minute.

"You're not. You need-"

"I'm fine."

"I told you to eat better," she said. "You're sick. I'll call-"

"Don't call anyone," she snapped.

Melissa, quietly, slipped her phone back into her pocket. The two girls sat there in the woods until Anna's pain subsided. Then they stood, and turned back to head home. And the whole time, Anna refused to say a word about any of it.

-o-