Peach Intermission:
At the Death Egg, two X-Nauts were sending Peach and Frankly over to Grodus.
X-NAUT #2:
O great, exalted Grodus! We brought the Princess Peach you ordered, sir!
X-NAUT #1:
And we also brought that old Goomba that showed up out of nowhere.
GRODUS:
I'm mainly more concerned about Princess Peach! I don't care about that old coot! Now, isn't it about time you told us where the Chaos Emeralds are, Peach? And you will speak when spoken to.
PEACH:
I'm telling you, I don't know.
GRODUS:
There's no point in trying to hide it, silly girl. We know you know them. We KNOW this. Trust me, it's very much in your interest to be absolutely honest with us. We X-Nauts are not all rainbows and lollipops, I assure you. We're quite nasty.
PEACH:
But…
(But a holographic screen showing an X-Naut shows up interrupting Peach)
X-NAUT #3:
Grodus, sir! I have news.
GRODUS:
Report at once.
X-NAUT #3:
You know that Chaos Emerald we thought maybe Hooktail had recently? Well, someone nabbed it from him.
GRODUS:
What? WHAT did you say? Someone else is after the Chaos Emeralds? And he nabbed it from that Hooktail creature, you say? SPEAK, soldier!
X-NAUT #3:
Yes, sir. Sorry, sir. There's more, too. See, according to the report, it was a mustached dude in a red hat and blue overalls who pulled the job.
FRANKLY:
Mario!
GRODUS:
Excuse me? Mario?
FRANKLY:
Oh crap!
PEACH:
Nice going, old coot!
GRODUS:
Gaack ack ack ack ack! I see… so you know of this Mario, do you, old coot? Hmmm… those fools matter not at all. I'll know all about him before long, that I promise. I grow bored of talking. Take them both back to the holding room.
X-NAUT #2:
Yessir!
GRODUS:
And men! Take good care of Princess Peach. Understand? She is not to be harmed.
X-NAUT #2:
You got it, sir!
(The two X-Nauts send Peach and Frankly to the holding room and the holographic screen shuts off)
GRODUS:
Well, Lord Crump… if this Mario character has one of the Chaos Emeralds that he got from Hooktail… I don't know where the others are aside from the one that I kept safe with me.
LORD CRUMP:
Uhh… I think I know where the other one is.
GRODUS:
Speak up!
LORD CRUMP:
Well, I heard Randall saying that one of them got scattered in the Boggly Woods somewhere in Hawaii. In the Great Tree where these weird creatures called Punies live.
GRODUS:
Then you better go there immediately and hasten the excavation. It must not fail.
LORD CRUMP:
Sure thing! Roger, Grodus! And with that… pow! I'm gone!
(Lord Crump exits the scene)
GRODUS:
I wonder if sending Lord Crump there alone is wise… he is a bit… out there. Hmmm… X-Naut! I summon you!
(The X-Naut went up to Grodus)
X-NAUT:
You rang, dude? I mean, sir? You rang, sir, Grodus, dude? Grodus? Sir Grodus, sir?
GRODUS:
Shut up. Go get the Shadow Sirens over here.
X-NAUT:
The Sh-Shadow Sirens, sir? But they…
GRODUS:
I don't care how you planned to end that sentence, fool. Go get them. Now.
X-NAUTS:
Gotcha!
(The X-Naut left the scene. Just then, someone was talking under the shadows)
? ? ?:
The honorable Grodus has need of us? Then we arrive without delay.
(Three weird purple ghosts named Beldam, Marilyn, and Vivian emerged)
GRODUS:
Beldam, Marilyn, and Vivian… I have an assignment for you!
BELDAM:
What is it? We'll do anything for you, sir!
GRODUS:
Randall told Lord Crump that one of the scattered emeralds is in Hawaii.
BELDAM:
Hawaii? That's where Randall's gonna marry this Madame Flurrie chick for her stuff that he needs for his soon-to-be real wife, Vivian.
VIVIAN:
Beldam, I told you, I don't wanna marry…
BELDAM:
Zip it, Vivian!
GRODUS:
Yeah! Anyway, I want you to tell this Flurrie lady to invite these "Punies" to her wedding so Lord Crump can find that emerald! Do I make myself clear?
BELDAM:
You can count on us, sire!
(To Marilyn and Vivian)
BELDAM:
We're off to Hawaii, my lovelies! Marilyn! Vivian! Let's go!
(They descended into their shadows. Meanwhile with Peach and Frankly)
PEACH:
Oh, dear… here we go again… I can't believe I got kidnapped by another villain instead of Bowser. I hope Mario comes to my rescue. But… hang on a moment! Where in the world are we, anyway?
FRANKLY:
Yeah, this place is so unfamiliar…
PEACH:
I forgot to ask, who are you? Tell me your name!
FRANKLY:
I'm Professor Frankly, I'm the professor of Rogueport College.
PEACH:
Huh, I've been at Rogueport before someone knocked me out with the… wait a minute… isn't that dome-headed guy responsible for my bump on my forehead!?
FRANKLY:
I don't know, but let's explore at least a little bit of this place.
(Peach and Frankly went into the bathroom)
PEACH:
What a lovely shower! No soap scum, even! Wow. I wonder if it works… Um, Professor Frankly, can I some privacy, please.
FRANKLY:
Sure.
(Peach then got in the tub behind the curtains and began showering as she was humming her castle theme from Super Mario 64)
PEACH:
Ahhhhhh! Hee hee!
(After her shower, she dried herself and got all dressed)
PEACH:
How refreshing! I feel like a new princess!
(Peach then left the room and was greeted by Frankly)
FRANKLY:
How was the shower, Peach?
PEACH:
Pretty good, actually.
(They heard a door open)
FRANKLY:
What was that?
PEACH:
Hmm? Hey! How odd… the doors opened by themselves.
FRANKLY:
Weird… it doesn't look like… anyone's around.
(Peach and Frankly walked all the way to the door that's straight ahead, and once they reached the door, it automatically opens)
PEACH:
How do I keep making these doors open? How odd…
(The duo finally got in the room where the door shuts behind them, and lights and computer turn on)
COMPUTER:
Hello, Princess Peach.
FRANKLY:
Huh? What? Who said that? Was that you, Goombella?
PEACH:
Show yourself, whoever you are!
COMPUTER:
How amusing. I am right here, before your eyes. I am this laboratory's main computer. I am the TEC-XX. Many call me TEC. You may. Sir Grodus created me to be a perfect computer, one that is flawless in its reason.
PEACH:
Grodus… wait, he's that awful dome-headed thing who interrogated me, right?
TEC:
Sir Grodus is not awful. He is a very great person. He is marvelous.
PEACH:
Well, I don't think so. But I doubt I'll change your mind… so, I'm wondering… why did you lead Frankly and I in here?
FRANKLY:
Yeah!
TEC:
I am unsure. An unusual program deviation occurred when I observed you earlier. My higher-brain circuitry malfunctioned and nearly overheated at your image. Also, an unidentified impulse sped through my processors. These events are new to me. There is more to this phenomenon, as well. I ran diagnostic programs, and their solution was… I want to know more about you. I want to observe you. Such a compulsion has no precedence. Cause unknown. I, the perfect computer… I must diagnose this unusual situation. I will not fail. That is why I led you here.
PEACH:
Wait… did you just say… you want to observe me? To know more about me? *gasps* Could it be that you… no! Impossible! It can't be. You're a computer…
TEC:
What has happened to me? If you know my malfunction, you must tell me of it.
PEACH:
Oh, I couldn't, really… because… it's just too weird.
TEC:
Please tell me. Please. I am the world's best computer. I am perfect. There should not be anything that I do not understand. Please.
PEACH:
Well, you know, maybe… is it possible that, well… you're… in love… with me?
TEC:
"Love"? What is… "love"? I cannot compute this.
PEACH:
Wait, you don't know what love is? Love… how do I explain? Love tells you when you want to be with a person forever. It makes you feel happy just to see that person happy, smiling… having fun. When you love someone, you will do anything to help when he or she is in trouble.
TEC:
Happiness? Fun…? I have definitions for these words, but… my programming is insufficient. There should be nothing I cannot comprehend. I am a perfect computer.
PEACH:
"Comprehend" love? Love's not something you comprehend, TEC. You feel it.
(There were a few seconds of silence)
TEC:
Princess Peach… will you teach me to feel this thing you call "love"?
PEACH:
What? You're a computer! Why would you care about love?
TEC:
I am perfect. There must be nothing that I cannot comprehend. Nothing. That is why you must help me understand this thing called "love". Please. If you have any wishes that I can grant you in exchange, I will grant them. But, of course, I am unable to grant such a wish as letting you escape…
PEACH:
What, are you insane? You X-Jerks kidnapped me like common Koopas! And now you call me in here and ask me to teach you the meaning of love? I should spit on your screen! You'll grant my wishes? Ha! Why should I believe you?
TEC:
I understand you are angry. That emotion I comprehend. You need not teach me now. But I must learn of this thing. I must. There is no alternative. I must be a perfect computer. That is why, if you would just consider teaching me, I will grant your wishes. Do you understand me, Princess Peach? Now, tell me your wish.
PEACH:
Are you sure? Well, okay… here goes… can I contact someone? The sooner, the better…
TEC:
Yes, of course you may. Use my communicator to send wireless mail to anywhere you want. If you so wish, you can use it right now. It is no trouble. Use the keyboard in front of you. Enter the recipient, address, and message.
PEACH:
You mean this keyboard? All right… let me give this a shot.
(She types in the phone number and then the message that she wants to send for the specific phone number)
PEACH:
Okay, it's ready, TEC. Could you send it?
(TEC sends the message)
TEC:
The message has been sent. For the time being, you may return to your room. I will call you in again when I want to ask you something.
(Peach and Frankly were about to walk out of the room until Peach turned around to talk to TEC)
PEACH:
Uh… okay then. Good night.
(Peach walked out of the room with the doors closing behind her, but Frankly stayed behind as he was getting ready to teleport somewhere else)
TEC:
Good night, Princess Peach.
(The lights turned off, and Frankly teleported to his next destination)
Bowser Intermission:
(It was a gloomy day in Castle Draga in McDonald Island. Bowser and Frankly entered the castle)
BOWSER:
Gra ha ha har! Bowser, the mighty Draga king, has arrived! Hold your applause, minions!
FRANKLY:
And Professor Frankly, too!
KOOPER:
Whoa! Who is that Goomba, dada?
BOWSER:
I don't know how that Goomba got here, but he said his name is Professor Frankly.
KOOPATROL:
Hey, uh, Great Lord Bowser… your crusty hag mother, Kammy will arrive momentarily.
KAMMY:
I'm here, son!
BOWSER:
Whoa!
KAMMY:
And who's that new friend of yours?
BOWSER:
Ugh, he's not my friend, we just barely met!
KAMMY:
Okay?
(Kooper runs up to Kammy and hugs her)
KOOPER:
Hey, granny!
KAMMY:
Hi there, Kooper!
(She kisses him on the cheek)
KAMMY:
Anyway, son, I just wanted to tell you that I took a visit to the Floating Island, when I discovered something horrible: the Chaos Emeralds are scattered all over the place!
BOWSER:
C-Chaos… Emeralds?
KAMMY:
Yes, the Chaos Emeralds! They are powerful diamonds!
FRANKLY:
And it's said that one of them is lying in a grass in Petal Meadows!
BOWSER:
Ooh, they sound like they could even bring people back from the dead! I want 'em so I can revive Annabelle!
CLAWDIA:
Honey, what are you talking about?
BOWSER:
The Chaos Emeralds! We can take those so we can revive our daughter!
CLAWDIA:
sighs* Listen, Bowser, when people die, they're dead forever, there's no way to revive our daughter.
BOWSER:
Come on, sweetie, I'll make your dreams come true, and she'll realize that suicide is a bad choice! Just hear me off with a smile now, okay?
(Bowser starts his clown car)
CLAWDIA:
Bowser, this isn't a good idea.
(But Bowser didn't listen and crashed through the wall)
KAMMY:
Hey Bowser, wait for me!
(Kammy took off after Bowser)
CLAWDIA:
Not you too, Kammy! Ugh, Bowser never listens!
(Frankly teleports himself out of here. Outside the castle, Bowser and Kammy are seen flying off)
To Be Continued