Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto

A/N:

Dearest Readers,

We have reached chapter 30! How exciting! This chapter was a fun write. I like messing with Minato a lot and Kakashi happens to be my medium of choice. Because no one trolls you quite like a brother. And Minato does a lot of questionable decision making when it comes to a certain someone. Lol. Anyways. Hope you like. And if you don't tell me why! Please and thank you.

~L.H.

Chapter 30: Pivotal Moments

"Haruno-san!" The loud, deep voice seemed to boom over the whole compound. She did not care. She was too excited at the sight of his bright smile and triumphant dark eyes to care who was looking. Sakura set down the basket of dirty dishes in a hurry and ran to him. She wiped her hands on her clothes as she did so. He had just taken three steps into the compound when he called out for her.

"Lee-san," she looked at him with unconcealed hope.

"I found it!" He was beside himself with a sense of accomplishment and relief.

'Thank you, Kami.'

Sakura took the letter with a large smile on her face. "Thank you, Lee-san."

"I'm sorry it took so long," the brightness of his smile dimmed considerably. He even hung his head a little bit. "It won't happen again. I have a new system. I'm more organized. I'll work twice as hard now to regain your trust."

"You still have my trust, Lee-san," she said hurriedly, wanting nothing more than to end this interaction and read what was contained in the letter. But she can do neither. She has a job and while Ambe-san was surprisingly lax at some of her discretions she knew not to push it. Any warmth or regard that woman had for her was all because of Naruto. Sakura was not a fool.

"Regardless, Haruno-san. I will maintain my new standard not just for you but for all my customers. Thank you for not losing faith and allowing me a chance to redeem myself. As such, your next three deliveries are free. Round trip." He held up a hand to quiet her non-existent protest. "I will not take no for an answer."

"Okay," she agreed.

"Really?" Lee's face fell. "I was expecting more of a back and forth if I'm being honest." He almost looked disappointed.

"I'm sorry Lee-san," her face did contain remorse. "But I really should be going. I have a mountain of dishes to wash." She gestured over her shoulder. He peeked around her.

"I see," he chuckled nervously. "Well, sorry once again for bothering you, and thank you for your understanding."

"Of course, Lee-san. Thank you for not giving up on this." She smiled at him kindly.

Lee nodded his head. 'I'm not giving up. Ever.' He watched her pick up the basket and leave with renewed spirits.

She tugged at the ends of her hair hard enough to rip the strands from her scalp by the root. Her heart thundered in her chest. Her palms were damp from her nerves.

"I'm going to throw up," she mumbled as she was reduced to nothing more than a sweaty mess. But relief showed no signs of coming soon. Mercy was not in the cards for her.

The Sensei had visited her parents. The Sensei was treating her father. The Sensei was helping. And that happened over two weeks ago! And she had no idea why. She had zero clue. Her mother had all but chewed her out in the letter for keeping the fact she knew a Sensei 'so well' from them. And for a second reason for not sending him in sooner. The characters on the sheet spelled out that her father was doing better. Much better. And while that should have brought her tears and happiness it only brought dread. Her dread of why the Sensei did what he did overshadowed it all.

"How does he even know about Otosan?" She groaned out her question. She racked her brain for the hundredth time and she came back empty. "Why didn't he say anything?" She had just seen him at the clearing. "Why?" Nothing was making sense to her.

She did not know his motives or his expectations because Senseis simply did not make house calls on whims. And despite her mother's glowing endorsement of the man, she was not convinced. Her mother had made questionable decisions all her life. Running off across the country to marry a man she had one conversation with, in the dead of the night, was among the top three questionable decisions she made in her life. Top three! She was lucky her father's intentions and words lined up but it could have ended so badly for her mother. She was basically royalty, a Hime of sorts. She would have fetched a high price in some whore house.

She paced back and forth. Her mind was miles and miles away. Tonkia was much too far away and for the first time, she felt every bit of the distance. What she would give to be a fly on the brick wall when he walked into the house. She chewed on her bottom lip.

"What the actually fuck?!" She asked the void in sheer disgruntled desperation. Of all the irresponsible things. He should have told her. At the very least. He should have confirmed and asked what medications he was taking. He did not know her father's history. This was a disaster.

"He should have talked to me!" She glared at the wall of her room. "You Baka!" She dug her nails into her scalp. "You told him too much! You shared too much."

She took in a deep breath. She must have. She did not remember doing so but she must have. Nothing was adding up.

Her father's quick turnaround was a miracle at best and suspicious at worst. Was this a blessing or a horrible punishment? From where she stood she could not make the call and that was terrifying. Nauseatingly so.

"He's a professional." She reminded herself to keep from giving herself an aneurysm. "He probably asked. He had to have asked. He asked." She brought a hand to her stomach. "He's respected. He's legitimate. It's fine. You're overthinking. He went to help. Otosan is doing better." Her words sounded more and more convincing. "Yeah, he's fine. Okaasan would have noticed if he was a bad different. She knows him. She knows what signs to look for."

She pushed her hair over her forehead. "Otosan has one leg. He can't sneak off to buy drugs. He doesn't even know how. Okaasan would know." She closed her eyes. "Kami." She blinked back the tears. She was on the verge of a mental breakdown.

Her perception of what was happening relied entirely on her mother's viewpoint. Her perspective. She bit the inside of her cheek to keep crying out.

"Kami." The name of the creator left her mouth like a desperate prayer. "Please help us." They needed it. Sorely. "It's fine. It's fine." She turned on her heel. "You're catastrophizing." She chided herself. "Stick to the facts."

She rolled her eyes up to the blank ceiling. She focused on the cracks. "The facts." She muttered with more calmness.

"He's doing better." She reminded herself over and over again. "The Sensei is helping him." She interlocked her fingers over her head and breathed as deeply as she could. "He's doing better. He's okay." She exhaled slowly. "This is a good thing. Otosan is getting treatment." She slowly convinced herself. "He's getting help." She closed her eyes. "The Sensei is helping Otosan."

Her stomach sank to her toes. "The Sensei is helping Otosan," she whispered in a much more solemn manner. Sakura pressed her back against the wall. She hung her head. Her hair fell like a curtain around her. She stared at her toes with glossed-over eyes.

"The Sensei is helping."

She pushed off the wall. Her eyes never left her feet as she moved. She was indebted to him. And that put her in a very dangerous position. A position she would never allow herself to be in. But here she was all the same. She continued to pace back and forth wearing out the floorboards. Sunday was four whole days away. It might as well have been a lifetime away. She gnawed on her lip between her teeth. She would have to wait until Sunday to ask him. She could not demand answers. She was in no position to. He was helping. What he was doing was helping. Her father was getting better. Her family's well-being always came before her and her freedom. She would have to settle for asking. She could only hope it did not come down to begging. For she would do that too if need be.

Everything seemed to leave her at the realization. Everything but acceptance. Which was another word for defeat. He was helping. It was happening. There was nothing else she could do now.

Sakura stared at the blank sheets of paper on her desk. She had no motivation, desire, or inspiration to write back to her mother. It would have to wait until after she spoke with the Sensei. She did not know what to do. She could not bring this up with Tomoha. The woman would not be interested in the plights of her life. Miharu, while meaning well, had a very warped view of the world. She would probably advise Sakura to threaten to feed the Sensei his kidneys if he stopped treating her father. Juna, Juna was a gossip. She would spread Sakura's sad reality to the whole house and she was leaving anyway. The one person she wanted to talk to was not there. He was too far away and this was simply too heavy to dump in a letter. Especially when he was dancing with death every day.

It was limited but she still had an option. She sank into the desk. She picked up the brush and pushed a piece of paper towards her. She took a calming breath and began to write. There was one person who she could still turn to.

She grunted in barely contained anger. Her new routine was something she did not consent to and it was definitely not something she cared for. She slammed the soapy, sudsy fabric against the stone so hard that little soapy clumps lined her face. She did not care. Her eyes were fixed on his head. She wished for the first time that she actually had a different mark of the demon than just her hair. She wished she had actual demon abilities such as setting someone on fire with her mind. It would suit her rather nicely in her current predicament.

'The damn Kyuubi had it all figured out.'

Usually Naruto's nap time - a period anywhere from forty-five minutes to an hour and fifteen - was the time she used to do her chores uninterrupted and unbothered. It worked for her. She looked forward to the 'quiet hour' as she called it. Because no matter how much she loved his company and him, she needed her quiet hour. But like everything else, it did not last.

She rubbed the fabric together hard enough to start a fire. He started to use her quiet hour as a 'small talk' hour. Something she resented greatly. She hardly talked or engaged but for whatever reason possessed the man, he was happy to talk to her less than receptive face. Like today. Just like yesterday and the day before. And probably just like tomorrow.

Oh, how she had come to despise his face. The way he would smile at her or try to sneak a couple of glances at her chest while she bent down to wash his laundry. Today it was his shirts. Yesterday it was his pillowcase. She would kill him if he handed her his underwear. She was sure of it. Maybe the Sensei could just adopt her parents. Her mother loved him enough to be okay with that.

"Careful," Jiraiya's voice broke her from her downward spiral of despair and resentment. "That's fine cotton that you're rubbing to death."

"I thought you wanted them clean?" She snapped at him. At least that was one good thing. Jiraiya did not care what she said to him. In fact, the rougher she became the more it seemed to please him.

"I'm not explaining this to you again." He paused filing his nails to study her in a bored manner. "Are you wearing chest wraps?" He asked her with a deep frown.

"Yes," she said through clenched teeth. She had learned quickly after yesterday.

"Killjoy," he sighed. "Have you been in love before?"

She nearly ripped the shirt in two. Sakura blinked up at him knowing with every bone in her body that engaging with him would be a mistake.

"No," she said through tight lips. Her frustrations were being taken out on the shirt with a vengeance. Maybe if she ripped a couple he would not ask her to come again. But she was not going to hold her breath. He claimed he was bored. And so he decided that since he had no inner peace he had to take hers too.

"Ah so you're one of them," there was something unnerving with the way he looked at her. He waved his hand dismissively. "I should have known. You're not exactly subtle about it."

She leaned back until her back was as straight as a post. "One of what?" Impatience colored each of her words. Jiraiya was getting better at getting under her skin. He had it down to a science. It helped that she nearly lost any and all respect for him earlier this week when he pulled this stunt for the first time.

"One of those who lie to themselves." He sighed as if he had just finished imparting the secrets of the universe to her and he was fraught with exhaustion from the efforts. "It honestly explains so much."

"Because you're such an expert," she muttered under her breath and punctuated with a snort.

"I am," Jiraiya said in response to what he was not supposed to hear. "I do it all the time too. The whole 'it takes one to know one' bit."

Lines erupted in her forehead as she pinched her face together in a look of disagreement. "What do you lie to yourself about?"

"Uh-uh-uh," Jiraiya wagged his finger at her, making her almost want to rip it off his hand. "We are talking about you, Little Hime."

"Don't call me that," Sakura bared her teeth at him. "It's utterly ridiculous," she gestured to her person. "No self-respecting Hime would be elbows deep in your clothing." She grimaced at the hurt expression that flashed across his face. "Sorry," she lowered her head. She hit too close to home with her last careless remark.

"You speak the truth," Jiraiya did not bat an eye now that he had his mask back in place. "Just like I do. You're a Hime by blood. Diluted blood but blood all the same."

"Jiraiya-sama," she looked up at him with something akin to pleading in her eyes. "Please," the pain in them was very real.

"Fine," he grumbled looking away. "You take the fun out of everything, Sakura."

"Thank you," she resumed washing the shirt in her hands. "Don't call me Little Blossom either or Cherry, or any combination of."

He threw up his hands. "You know sometimes I forget who is the boss here."

"Not you and not me," she answered with a snort. "You can't have it both ways."

"I suppose you're right," he rubbed his chin.

"Have you heard anything?" She asked him casually, not looking up.

"Are you going to ask me that every time?" Jiraiya asked her gruffly.

"Are you going to make me rewash your perfectly clean clothes every time?" She shot back.

"No," he pressed his lips together. "I don't write and I don't expect to be written to. And trust me, you don't want me to write to them or them to write to me."

"Hm," she grumbled. Her hopes were all but dashed.

"The war's been raging for five years, kid. What's a couple more? Be patient. These things take time." He said offhandedly.

Her heart seized at the thought of his words and the reality that they built. "It's just that Naruto-kun just reconnected with his -"

"Father, yeah yeah. We get that. The kid's used to it. He's resilient. He'll be fine without Minato." The white-haired man yawned.

"Maybe you should take a nap," Sakura offered helpfully.

"Maybe you should focus on cleaning," he grinned. "You missed a spot." He kicked up dirt.

She glared at him at the presence of brown on the otherwise white garment. "Why?!"

"You're being too candid with me, I don't like it." The shine in his eyes said otherwise.

"Then ask someone else, Jiraiya-sama." Her nostrils flared. "There is no shortage of staff for you to harass."

"They are too eager to please, no fun in that. Besides, you're smart." He eyed her up and down. "For a woman."

Sakura rolled her eyes. She was not going to fall for his attempt to rile her up further. He was classmates with Tsuande. He knew just how smart women could be.

"So anyway," Jiraiya elongated the word. "This is a perfect example of you lying to yourself. The war didn't bother you all that much before because you had no direct interest. Now that you do, it's killing you. Now you're scared. War is terrifying. Its impact can be quantified in your life now."

She slammed the shirt against the stone washboard. "I have no idea what you're talking about." Sakura just managed to not cross her arms over her chest in a huff.

"The man you love, horse boy, is out there and not here. And that's why you can't seem to get a grip on your thoughts." There was a teasing edge to him. His eyebrows wiggled playfully.

Anger pulsed through her veins. She reached for the wet garment. Sakura stood up so fast that her head spun. She crossed the distance between them. Her eyes blazed with blind rage. She shoved the wet shirt into his chest.

"Wash your own damn clean laundry from now on." She made to stalk away.

"So I guess I'll see you in my room tomorrow then, does this time work for you?" Jiraiya asked her through a grin that went from ear to ear.

Sakura froze. She walked backward only to spin around and snatch the sopping-wet shirt from his hands. She gnashed her teeth together and all but sank into the stool. She could not do anything about the smug look on Jiraiya's face but she would be damned if his white shirts did not look better than the day he bought them.

Dear M,

I am doing well, thank you for asking. And I suppose it would be the polite thing to do to ask how you are. How are you? Are you eating alright? Are you able to sleep given the conditions? It has been raining here so I am concerned that you and your company are facing harsh conditions such as snow. Is that the case? Please be mindful of that and take additional precautions. Sometimes rocks and thorns and jagged branches get covered in snow so be sure to check the horses' feet when you can. And black ice can be hard to spot at fast speeds. Do be careful.

Honestly the thought of my letter being read by someone other than you never crossed my mind. I'm sorry for any trouble, confusion, or misunderstanding my oversight caused. I should have asked.

Things at the compound are going well. Better than well actually. One of the cows gave birth to the cutest calf. Naruto-kun named him Chairo-chan and you'll never guess why! He's brown. Chairo-chan is brown. Naruto-kun is a true visionary. So creative. Chairo-chan might just be the cutest baby animal I have ever seen. I wish I could draw so that I could have sent you a picture. He's just so precious. Sorry. I realize I'm rambling.

I passed along your message to the stars. And even though there was not a soul around when I did so, I felt so silly. I feel like you're playing a prank on me somehow. I sincerely hope you're not. But it is done. I have no way of confirming if they in fact understood the message but I feel like I have done my part.

Your handwriting is terrible. So if anyone needs drafts, it's you. You will continue to receive my honest, genuine, authentic self. I write what I want, how I want, and when I want. Deal with it.

Stay careful. Stay warm. Stay alive.

Sincerely,

Sakura

P.S. Please write back

"Did you really spend a whole paragraph talking about a cow?" He looked at the woman lodging on his cot, her pink hair tucked away in her bandana, unbothered by the cold, and how unsuited her brown kimono was for the elements.

"A calf, Minato," Sakura rolled her eyes. "There's a difference."

It turns out that the arrow that hit him was laced with something. Something that he was still working out of his system. The last of the symptoms? Mild hallucinations. It was fitting that he was hallucinating her.

"You are unbelievable," he chuckled knowing full well that he was talking to nothing but air. But he did not care.

"You better not write that to the real me," her voice was closer to his ear. He could feel her nonexistent hand on his shoulder as she peered at the letter in his hands. "It's hard to convey a joking tone via writing. And I tend to take things the wrong way."

Minato scoffed in agreement. "You don't like my handwriting?" He looked at her with an amused expression.

"Looks like ants on a sheet of paper." Sakura smiled at him. "Did you like my little comment about honesty and authenticity?" She batted her eyelashes at him.

Minato's smile dimmed. Sakura laughed, not entirely unkindly.

"What are you going to write to me?" She perched herself onto his desk, swinging her legs back and forth all while smiling prettily at him.

"I'm losing my mind," he did not sound too broken up about it.

"You just miss me," Sakura said with a cold sigh. "I'm not convinced I'm here because of the poison."

"Oh, you don't trust the medic?" He asked her with a raised brow.

"Nope, he seems incompetent." She played with the ends of her bandana. "But then again I'm biased."

Minato lowered his eyes. "Your Otosan."

"Hm," Sakura hummed in agreement. "Hindsight, right?" She laughed humorlessly.

"So why are you here?" Minato rested his chin on his palm, studying her intently. Every detail was perfect. Right down to every last pink eyelash.

"To help you work through something," Sakura answered thoughtfully. "Just a manifestation of your subconscious because you keep trying to push everything down. Deny, deny, deny. It's all very one-dimensional."

"If that's true, why would my subconscious take on your form?" He reasoned with what could not be explained.

Sakura smiled and he was left breathless. "Because you find me pleasant to look at, silly." She slapped his shoulder playfully. "Maybe if it's coming out of my mouth you'd actually listen."

Minato sighed. He could not reason with that logic no matter where it was coming from or how it was coming.

"How much longer will you be here?" He asked her, his expression suddenly turning grave.

"Depends on you," she answered with a shrug. "Why?" Her green eyes shone like emeralds in the sunlight.

"You're a distraction," he said with as much tact as he could. His voice was gentle but her face scrunched up in displeasure anyway. They had pushed back the journey too many days already.

"Definitely do not say that to the real me in your letter." She brought her hand to her chest. "You'll break her heart." She cupped the side of his face. His eyelashes fluttered closed. He leaned into her warmth that should have been there. "Deal with it, Minato."

"I won't and I will," he promised her. By the time his eyes opened, he was truly alone in his tent.

She watched him talk to the man she was never to address or approach. Her knee bobbed up and down as she did so. Even the air around him felt menacing. And that was from across the way. It was beyond her how the Sensei did not spontaneously combust into a pile of ash that just waited to be carried away by the wind. Scattered in countless directions. Miharu's description was very much accurate. The high-pitched voices around her do not notice in the slightest the impatient, frantic energy rolling off of her. She had no qualms about that. In fact, she preferred it. It was Friday. A whole two days before Sunday. Two days she did not have to spend overthinking every spare moment to dust. It was mercy. Or her incarceration. She still did not know which.

They appeared to be wrapping up. She only had their body language to rely on. She shot to her feet the moment Danzo turned his back and started to make his way back to what she assumed were his quarters.

"Be good, play nicely." She focused her stern gaze on Naruto. The boy squirmed. She did not stand still long enough to hear his words of indignation or protest. She only had a very small window. She stepped over their game of marbles and walked with legs that felt like jelly toward the man's retreating back. He had a longer stride than her simply from being taller but she was moving with purpose and he with leisure. She waited until he was in earshot before she cleared her throat.

"Sensei," she called out to him.

The reaction was instant. He stilled before turning around slowly. She saw the curiosity melt into a smile. He pushed up his glasses and waited for her to finish closing the distance.

"Haurno-san," he greeted her warmly. "How are you?"

"Good," she lied. "Is everything okay?" Her green eyes blinked at him, inquisitive.

"Ah," he held up his black bag and let out a small chuckle. "Yes, yes. Just here to deliver some medicine to one of the residents. Nothing out of the routine."

"I see," she tugged down on her bandana. "Um, Sensei, where did you go?" Wringing hands and not quite meeting his gaze, Sakura took a steadying breath. "On your last material gathering trip. Where did you go?" Her resolve and bravery grew enough for her to read his eyes.

The confusion on his face melted into realization.

"My planned destination was Hacho Village. The herbs I ordered are the freshest there and readily available. When I realized that Tonkia was next door I stopped by the village. I asked around for the Haruno household and ended up in your parent's home." He rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. "I had some time and one thing just kind of bled into the other before I knew what was happening."

"You went to Tonika," she furrowed her brow. Her gut churned and her brain spun.

"I did," he smiled kindly. "I had to. I remembered you mentioning you were from there. I just couldn't help myself. I got curious. I wanted to see where you were from and it turns out everyone knows everyone so finding their home was not difficult at all."

"I did?" She asked him in surprise, having no recollection of the conversation taking place. "I told you I'm from Tonika?"

Kabuto chuckled. "Yes, you did, Haruno-san. When you described your father's orchards so vividly that I had to see them for myself." His smile slipped off his face. "The trees are gone." He said in a small voice.

"I did?" She repeated in her same surprised manner. "I told you about that?" Disbelief colored her words.

"Of course, Haruno-san." The mirth and amusement was back on his face and his voice. "How else would I know?"

Her mind went blank and her mouth went dry. She blinked once. Then again and again and again. Heat flooded her face. Her mother's words of not trusting everyone coming back to bite her.

"I'm sorry," she looked down at her feet hoping that the ground would swallow her whole.

"Don't worry, Haruno-san. It's hard to keep track of it all. Our conversations do cover a variety of topics. I don't mind. I have a good memory." His eyes sparkled kindly. She felt her embarrassment recede taking her apprehension along with it. "I tend to remember things that I find interesting. Such as you."

His words hit her like an arrow. An arrow she had been struck with before because they were familiar. A blond face danced in the eyes of her mind.

'Minori-san.'

"Why not tell me?" She asked with bravado that surprised even her. "That you were going to Tonkia."

"It wasn't planned," Kabuto explained patiently. "It was a whim really. I found myself with some time and decided to go for it. Hardly something worth mentioning."

'I disagree.'

"How did you know that my father was sick?" She frowned.

"I didn't," Kabuto rubbed the back of his neck. He held up his bag. "Where I go this goes. Emergencies rarely announce themselves; it is better to be prepared."

"Oh," she said in a small voice, suddenly feeling very stupid.

"I remembered you mentioning that you made painkillers. I merely had a suspicion is all." He smiled kindly. "I'm sorry about what happened to your Otosan."

'The painkillers.' Her head was spinning with so much information and sensory overload that she was having trouble thinking straight. Her bandana felt too tight. She tugged at the knot.

"Why not say anything?" She searched his face with a pinched expression. The restlessness and unease at her. "At the clearing last Sunday?"

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner." From the expression on his visage alone, she saw the remorse. His tone just further hammered it home. "I didn't want you to think I was being a showboat or expecting anything in return. I figured you would come to learn of it on your own time and approach me when you were ready." He explained in his gentle voice.

Sakura blinked rapidly as if the action helped with her focus. "The painkillers," she muttered.

"Your mother showed them to me," he nodded his head. "Before I administered any treatment. And besides, I already knew two of the ingredients." He chuckled.

"My father is a recovering addict," she lowered her eyes. "The risk of an opioid addiction is very real."

"He mentioned that," Kabuto's voice did not contain ridicule or judgment. "My philosophy is holistic medicine. I'm sure you already picked up on that from the resources I shared with you. But I want to put any of your reservations to rest. The treatment is non-addictive. You don't have to worry."

Relief flooded her. It was sudden and overwhelming. "You examined him? He let you?" She asked in surprise.

"I did," Kabuto nodded his head. His eyes contained nothing but patience. He smiled disarmingly at her. "I was able to tailor a treatment just for your father's needs."

"I can pay you," she said quickly. "Not all at once." Her throat constricted. "In installments with interest. I can collect plants for you at the clearing. On my hours off on Sunday I can clean the shop. I can cook. Or help with the restocking or the prep. Do laundry. Anything," she swallowed thickly. "Maybe we can work something out?"

"Haruno-san," Kabuto said with a smile that was kind, patient, and full of compassion. "I'm a doctor. I took an oath to do no harm. I simply did my job. Nothing less and nothing more."

"Sensei -"

"Sakura-san," his eyes became soft. "Your parents welcomed me with such warmth, warmth I've never felt in my life before. It honestly did not even feel like we were meeting for the first - well second - time. It's like I've known them my whole life. It was a little rocky in the beginning," he chuckled good-naturedly.

Sakura's eyes widened. "My Otosan threatened you." She covered her mouth in horror.

"To wear me like a second skin if I showed my face again."

"Kami, I'm so sorry. He's overprotective and in pain…and…" she struggled to find the words to excuse the inexcusable. Out of his mind did not seem respectable enough even if it was pretty accurate at times.

"It's okay," Kabuto assured her with his sureness. "Your father and I have already spoken about this." He grabbed his chin and tilted his head, lost in his own thoughts. "There should be a letter coming in any day now that tells you how much money to set aside for the installment payments. "

Sakura waited with bated breath for him to finish his train of thought.

"You will pay me for the material for the medicine." Kabuto summarized. "In whatever timeframe that works for you, no interest."

"Really?" Sakura searched his face with almost desperation.

"Really," Kabuto reached for her shoulder, catching himself halfway. "Sorry," he muttered. "Old habit." He was absolutely embarrassed.

"Thank you," Sakura gave him a smile instead that was powered by the flourishing hope in her heart. "Thank you, Yakushi-sensei." Her voice nearly broke with emotion. She could not help but stare into his dark eyes so warm with gratitude. All her concerns and fears were being swallowed into the pull of his dark obs like a black hole. Nothing was left. He took it all away.

"Sakura-san, I wish I could have helped sooner. If I had known." He began almost remorsefully which only added to her guilt.

"Sensei," she shook her head and lowered her head. The words refused to form in her throat. It was not his burden. It was hers. She could not afford treatment. She knew that. They had tried with less experienced and knowledgeable healers from different villages. It was not feasible or realistic for her to ask him to take a look. She did not even have enough to cover his travel costs.

"Sakura-san." She looked up at him in surprise. The level of empathy in his voice sounded so foreign to her ears. "I understand."

She furrowed her brow. She opened her mouth to ask just what he thought he understood. Because she certainly did not.

"Sakura!" A voice hollered so loud that her bones rattled, breaking her eye contact with the Sensei. She looked around to see Miharu shouting at her through cupped hands. "The boys!"

Sakura's eyes widened. "I'm so sorry, Sensei!" She all but squeaked out. "I need to go." She bowed once then again, and again and again. "Thank you, thank you, thank you, Sensei. I'll come by the shop on Sunday with the first of my payment. Thank you," she bowed one final time before she ran back in the direction she came.

The soft smile on his face drunk in the moonlight had her whole body relaxing. She almost did not want to set foot on the roof for fear of breaking him out of his trance or interrupting the silent conversation taking place between them. It was like the moon was worshiping him. The way the beams settled on his laid-back stance. His head cradled in the back of his hand. He was mesmerizing. He took her breath away. Perfect in his imperfections. She wanted to learn all of them.

He turned his head in her direction. His silver-casted hair framed his face in a way that left her stomach fluttering and her lungs gasping for air.

"Sakura."

"Minori-san," she lingered on the last wrung.

"Come on," he gestured with his head for her to join him. With sure footsteps, she came to stand next to him before ultimately lowering down to her back. "What's bothering you?"

"That transparent am I?" She asked humorlessly. Her folded hands rested on her stomach.

"Hm just a guess," he offered kindly without judgment or ridicule or offense. "I like to come out here when I need to think. Maybe I was just projecting."

"What's bothering you?" She turned her head to take him in because watching him through the corner of her eye did not do him any justice.

"I asked you first," his teasing grin warmed her insides despite the best efforts of the wind and the cool of the moon.

Sakura sighed deeply. His eyes did not leave hers. "I'm happy my Otosan is finally getting proper treatment from such a component doctor. I am truly. My Okaasan and I have been praying for this exact opportunity for over a year." She chewed on the inside of her cheek as she tried to find the right words that would not diminish his opinion of her. "But…" her eyes left his as she came up empty-handed and without thought.

"It's okay," he reached for her hand. His touch was warm and encompassing. He squeezed her fingers. She was thankful that he did not let go. "Take your time."

"I just," she swallowed thickly. The way his thumb was drawing circles on the back of her hand was comforting and a little distracting. Every time he finished a circle, a jolt raced through her. "I am happy. Initially, I was scared of the Sensei's intentions but talking to him helped. At first," she admitted out loud in the mind of her subconscious. "But the more time I had to think about it, it almost seemed too good to be true. He's letting me pay for the material but his time and labor have value too, value I can't afford. I just feel like the trade is not fair. I feel indebted to him."

"Hm," Minato opened his eyes slowly. There was so much swimming in his dark, dark eyes. But she could make out understanding and honesty. Everything about him just put her at ease. He did not even have to think about it. His aura was soothing, like the moon but so much warmer like the sun. He was like nothing she had seen or anyone she met before.

"It's not a good feeling being indebted to someone," Minato said in a level voice that could ease her to sleep.

"Have you been indebted to someone?" Sakura asked him, playing with their interlaced fingers. How she longed to kiss his knuckles. But that would be too foolish to entertain even in her dreams.

"We all need help sometimes, Sakura." His eyes twinkled. "Being independent is a good thing. It's a great thing but when taken to an extreme it can be as harmful as being passive and a leech. No one can get through life without help every now and then. It doesn't make you any less capable or strong or worthy of respect."

"I'm indebted to my parents for giving birth to me. I'm indebted to the Master for giving me a roof over my head. And while I work and offer my time and labor, the scales are still not balanced. I'm indebted to you for saving my life."

"Don't be," she turned on her side and tilted her head up. She squeezed his hand. "You owe me nothing."

He traced the side of her face so tenderly that her heart ached. She knew that it was only possible in her head. All this was only possible in her head. He loved another. She could not have him even if he did not. But dreaming, dreaming did not cost anything. Even the poor and misfortuned could dream. Here he was safe and she was satisfied with this.

"You don't owe anyone anything either, Sakura." He pressed his forehead against hers. The hand that was not connected to hers, came to cup the side of her face.

"What's bothering you?" she leaned even closer still, her eyes were open and soft and so welcoming. Like a harbor waiting for him to dock all his worries and apprehensions to her so that he could rid himself of them.

"I'm not here." And that was the beauty and tragedy of it all. His thumb stroked her cheekbone. She felt her face go flush. The pink tint could not outmatch the silver glow of the moon. What he could not see he could surely feel under his skin. "You're so beautiful, Sakura." He smiled sadly with an intensity in his eyes that could swallow her whole.

"Minori-san," her eyelashes fluttered closed and her heart all but exploded. She dreamed of him holding her all night whispering in her ear reminding her she was not alone. She awoke with a soft smile on her lips and a dull pang in her heart.

He kept his eyes stubbornly on the middle-aged medic. Even if he did so, his peripherals could not help but catch her fluttering around the tent like a leaf caught in the wind. Nor could he completely drown out the sounds of her humming. It was all very distracting.

"Namikaze-sama?" The dark-eyed, dark-haired doctor looked at him expectantly.

He blinked slowly. Kakashi cleared his throat drawing Minato's eye and his attention - partially. Sakura was at Kakashi's shoulder looking at him with concern.

"Are you still seeing," Kakashi looked around before he leaned forward. "Things?" He asked in a low voice so that no sharp ears would hear their ramifications.

"Tell him, Minato," Sakura urged him enthusiastically. Her hands were on her knees as she leaned forward. "Tell him if you're still seeing 'things'." She shot Kakashi a dirty look. "Not the word I would use." She added with a scowl.

"Minato," Kakashi's tone was grave. "Are you still seeing her?"

The blond did not answer. He turned to the sensei. "How are my vitals?"

"Everything is fine. You should be back to normal. All traces of the toxin are gone from your system. It's not in your blood, saliva or urine." The doctor listed off with a blank face.

Sakura scrunched hers. "I can't believe he tasted your urine." She shuddered. "Medicine here is in the dark ages."

Minato ignored her. "So there should be no reason for me to be seeing anything?"

"None." The doctor said with a nod of his head.

Sakura moved her fingers in an attention-gathering manner. "And yet here I am!" She spun in a circle.

"Minato," Kakashi's voice pulled his cobalt eyes from off of Sakura. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," he said through a clenched jaw. "As right as rain." He spared the doctor and his friend a smile that did not reach his rich eyes. "Thank you, Sensei." The doctor dipped his head before gathering the last of his stuff and walking out of the tent. Sakura waved goodbye, animatedly.

"He may be an idiot but he is thorough," she said with something close to respect in her voice. She turned to look at him as she crossed her arms over her chest. She popped a hip to rest it against the edge of his desk. "So what now?" She blinked expectantly at him.

Minato scowled. He dipped his head and stared at the ground between his legs. His forearms rested on his thighs. He ran his fingers through his hair in a tired manner.

"You're still seeing her," Kakashi's lips barely moved behind his mask.

"I'm fine," Minato did not look up at him for his eyes would betray his dishonesty.

"Minato -"

"I'm going to go spar, clear my head for a bit." He rose to his feet. Pulling his shirt over his shoulders before securing it with the waist tie.

"I'll spar against you." Kakashi offered.

"No, I need someone who's not used to me and me, not them." His expression softened. "I'm fine, Kakashi."

"He's fine, Kakashi," Sakura waved her hand back and forth casually, dismissively. "When does Minato ever lie?" She asked cheerily. Her bent arm was resting on Kakashi's shoulder. She tapped her chin with her finger as if pondering her own question.

Minato nearly glared at her. He had to remind himself that Kakashi was still in the tent. He stalked away, the pinkette at his shoulders. He could feel her breath. He could hear her song. His dark blue eyes narrowed on the first face he saw.

"Inocihi," the Yamanaka stopped in his tracks at the sound of his voice. "Spar now." He turned on his heel, missing the uneasy look Kakashi and the Yamanaka exchanged.

"That was rude," Sakura noted with a frown. "He's your friend. You should be nicer to your friends. Just because they choose to put up with you doesn't mean you should take that for granted." She admonished him.

He ignored her just like he had been doing for the past few days. And just like the past few days, she was not discouraged at all. He grabbed the wooden pole that a soldier handed him. He planted his feet in the spar circle. Inoichi did the same across from him. His face was pulled into a grimace.

Sakura moved along the edge of the circle. Her arms were out as if she was balancing on a tightrope. She giggled when her feet deviated from the line.

"Ready?" Minato looked at his opponent, his body slid into a familiar stance.

Inoichi nodded his head. Minato moved first. The sticks clinked together as Inoichi countered. They moved in a deadly dance, each of them countering each attack perfectly. Minato pushed onto the balls of his feet. He saw his opening. He raised his pole to come down to strike Inocihi's face. Just as he was about halfway into his attack motion, Sakura appeared in front of the man. Minato's eyes widened. He abandoned his offensive.

He grunted when a kick landed on his side. He lost his footing in the snow and ended up on his back. A pair of green eyes peered down at him with a sympathetic face.

"Ouch, that looked like it hurt." She held out her hand.

Minato clenched his jaw and instead took the hand that Inoichi offered him. He could feel the wetness on his back. His head ached from the sudden exposure to the snow.

"You alright?" Inoichi asked him with ample concern. His lips barely moved as a sizable crowd had gathered to watch the spar.

"Fine," Minato pushed back. "Best two out of three." His eyes scanned the curious faces. He saw the same expression mirrored on their faces that Kakashi and Inoichi had worn.

He could not have his men losing faith in him. He lunged, wasting no time and paying no heed to the woman that only he could hear and see. It took him less than forty seconds for him to neutralize Inoichi in the second spar. And less than seventeen for the third and final one. He took no pride in the fact that the faces were looking at him in awe. It was a necessity. It was a given. If they did not trust him, he had no army. And he could not do this alone.

The icy wind stabbed his lungs and whipped through his hair. Kaminari's hair blended with the backdrop. They were but a speck of yellow and pink. Sakura's arms around his waist tightened as he picked up speed, a reminder that no matter how fast he moved he could not outrun her. Her delighted shrieks filled the air as if she had no cares in the world about enemy combatants hearing her and descending down on their location. There was no risk. Of that anyway.

The horse came to a stop near the boundary of where they determined was safe. He jumped down from the horse, displacing snow that was ankle-deep. Her sandals had no trouble walking over it. His boots trudged through it.

"It's been forever since I've been on a horse," she gushed. Her cheeks were flushed with excitement. "Thank you for that, Minato." She beamed at him in a way that made his stomach do very real flips even if she was very much not so.

She sat on a rock half covered in snow, unbothered by the dampness. She crossed her legs and rested her hands over her knee. Minato pushed onto a handstand. He waited until he had his balance before bringing one hand behind his back. He pushed down into his one-handed push-up.

The sound of her low whistle pierced his ears. "You're so fit," she noted almost obnoxiously in clear sarcastic scorn. That was how he knew that she was a part of his subconscious. If she were real, she would be a flustered mess. As she always was when she saw his chest. Going back to the first day they met. But maybe that was just his ego talking which was less than objective.

He counted his push-ups in his head. Grunts of exertion left his mouth every now and then.

"So you beat up your friend after lying to your other friend and now you're doing this for some Kami-forsaken reason. You know I'm not real, right? Like all this," she gestured to him. "Is doing nothing for me." Sakura frowned. "Minato," she said with a sigh as he continued to ignore her. He had switched hands and started his count from the top. "This is not you dealing with it." She hugged her knees to her chest. "You can't just punch, pushup, or sweat your way past this. Stop wasting time. There's a literal war at our doorstep."

The wind howled. It was her only response.

Sakura twirled a pink lock between her fingers. "Hm," she tilted her head to the side. "You know, strictly speaking, this may not be the worst idea ever. Maybe she'll get over you lying to her this whole time if you just do a couple of these in front of her. You'd make the poor girl go into cardiac arrest. Oh," her voice grew excited. "You could resuscitate her with mouth to mouth! That will surely win you some points. Resuscitate means to -"

"Shut up!" He snapped at her, harshly. His elbow refused to straighten. He lost his balance. The snow cushioned his blow as he fell on his face.

"Karma is a bitch," Sakura huffed. "You should know, that is no way to talk to a lady." She tapped her shoulder in a haughty manner. "And little Sakura is nothing if not a lady."

'You're not real.' It was a small miracle if he did not end up hating her after all this.

"Minato," Sakura crouched over his unmoving frame. "This isn't the way." She brushed his hair from his face. He could make out the sparkle of her eyes. So vivid and clear. His heart rate kicked up. "Did you break your neck?"

"No," he grumbled against the snow. His breath was visible against the crystal clear air.

"Good," Sakura pushed up to her feet. "Get up. Let's go. You'll catch a cold or your enemies will catch you."

Minato pushed up off the ground, brushing the last of the slush from his face and front. His clothes were drenched, front and back. They raced back to the compound. He did not remember returning Kaminari to his stall or taking a warm bath. All he knew was that Sakura was there for most of it. Thankfully, she had deemed it fitting to give him privacy for his bath. Real or not, he did not think he could manage to clean himself under her gaze.

He was warm and alone - not counting Sakura of course - and with a full belly. He had every intention of sleeping.

"You're not dealing," her exasperated voice called out. She was sitting cross-legged on his desk wearing a look of judgment. She was always judging.

"I'm going to bed and you'll not be here when I wake up." He said more for his benefit than hers.

"This is where Sakura, the real me, would probably insert a quip about the definition of insanity." Sakura made a show of gagging. "She's such a know-it-all." She made a face before lowering her face into her palm.

"She does know a lot," Minato mused, looking up at the top of the tent.

"Figures you find her intelligence attractive." Sakura sighed. "I suppose you do have variety in the women you've shown interest in. Although there is hardly a sample size to make any definitive observations."

"And yet that doesn't discourage you." He said dryly as he picked at the skin over his knuckles absentmindedly.

She grinned. "Gotta keep myself entertained somehow." She frowned. "You're under a lot of stress."

He grunted at the obvious. "Nothing I'm not used to."

Sakura narrowed her eyes. "Bull." She crossed her arms. "Minato." She conveyed so much disappointment and exasperation with a single utterance of his name.

"I'm not arguing with you." He said flatly. "Or myself." He added at the recognition of her less-than-impressed expression.

"Does that mean that you've made up your mind?" She implored him. "Did you decide to settle with a sure thing in me over the possibility of her?" Her voice turned gentle as she asked the loaded question.

Minato did not make a sound. He continued to lie there willing sleep to come to him. But like last night and the night before it was not so easy.

Was loneliness better than indulging the crazy? Or was seeing her better than nothing at all? He did not have an answer to either question.

"How will you react?" He asked her, turning his head to make out the outlines of her features in the dark.

"I don't know, Minato," she said somewhere between a sigh and a sympathetic sound. "I'm a fragment of your subconscious, not hers. Only she can answer that. Her or time," Sakura tapped her chin. "You can't let fear dictate your actions."

He clicked his tongue. He rubbed his eyes tiredly. His face still ached from where he landed on it. Thankfully there was no bruising. He did not know how he would begin to explain to Kakashi how it came to be.

"And while we're on the topic of dealing with stuff," she began brightly. "What's up with the rat-tail?"

He racked his hands through his hair. "Do you think she will like it?" His voice sounded every bit as unsure as he felt.

"See previous response," she deadpanned.

"You don't have any input?"

Sakura pushed her lips to the side. "Now that I think about it," she did not miss the way Minato stiffened. He was interested. "The Sensei has a ponytail. Is that why you're growing it out?"

Minato sat up with a scowl. Sakura flashed him a grin as he crossed the room and grabbed a blade from his desk. He held the ponytail in his hands and with one decisive cut, he sliced off half. The brown fabric that was holding it together started to slide off, he pulled it from his considerably shorter locks and secured it on his left wrist like a bracelet. It clung close to his skin.

Sakura looked at his face with amusement dancing in her eyes. "Good thing hair grows back, you cut it too short."

Minato rolled his eyes. He stepped over his discarded hair and sat on his cot with his legs crossed under him.

"Oh! You're dealing! I'm so glad." She clapped her hands. "It's great that I didn't have to turn into Tomoha-san or Jiraiya-Ojisan or your Otosama to get you to do it!" Sakura ran her hands over her frame. "Real me doesn't know the power she yields." She cupped her butt. "So powerful." She wiggled her eyebrows at him.

Minato glared at her. "I didn't realize how annoying I can be."

Sakura grinned. "Self-awareness is everything, Minato." She almost looked sad for a moment. "Do you want a goodbye hug or kiss or something? In case it, you know, works?" She held out her arms almost achingly.

He offered her a tender smile coupled with a shake of his head. Even in his current state, he knew where the line was. He knew when to disengage from the crazy. Minato closed his eyes. He closed himself to the world and looked inward. Trying to find the answer to the questions he already knew.

The next morning he rose, rested and refreshed, and told his men without a trace of duality that they would be leaving later in the day for the first base. Not even Kakashi gave him a hard time.

"Jiraiya-sama," Sakura gazed upon the face of the very tall man. "I have a question."

"Here we go," he rolled his eyes to the high heavens. They seemed to get stuck there for a few loud moments before they landed on her face once more. "Make it quick."

Sakura tugged at the knot of her bandana. "Earlier you said something about knowing when to dig and when not to, what did you mean about that?"

"Oh that," he cracked his neck causing Sakura to wince at just how loud the sound was. "I can't spoon-feed you everything kid. Figure it out yourself."

She kept her expression schooled. "I have another question."

"You only get one," he looked at her tiredly.

"You didn't answer it." Her hands found her hips.

"Fine," he flicked his hand in defeat.

"Why me?" Her eyes gave him all the context he needed.

Jiraiya rolled the toothpick on his tongue slowly. "Because," he offered with a shrug.

"Because what?" She prompted, not quite patiently.

Jiraiya sighed. "You could have just as easily been my niece okay?" He admitted looking embarrassed.

'What?'

Thankfully she had enough of her wits about her to keep that question internal. "Jiraiya-sama," she gawked at him. She suddenly felt very uncomfortable at his admission. She knew from her aunt that he liked her, and Sakura herself even concluded that he loved her aunt but for Jiraiya to say that was a whole nother level of delusion.

"I loved my Ojisan," it spilled out of her lips before she could stop herself.

Jiraiya glared at her. "What do you even remember about him, huh?" He asked harshly. "He left her."

"He died," Sakura corrected, completely taken aback. "It's different."

"Not in my book," Jiraiya spat out his words along with the toothpick. "I never would have left her."

"He got sick," Sakura said heartbrokenly.

"I would have found a way to keep fighting. To stick around no matter what condition. I would not allow myself to leave her, ever. Especially not so young." He scoffed. His tone dripped with disdain. He watched her rise to her feet with surprise.

"I killed him," Sakura said hallowly. "He's dead because of me." She turned and ran out of there before the stunned Jiraiya could ask her what in the world she ever meant. She left him gapping at the still-dry pants near the hand pump.

Sakura,

I am alive. I am safe. I am in one piece. Thank you for asking. Do tell me how you are.

Don't worry too much if the stars heard you. They are good listeners. There will be a blood moon within a couple of days of you receiving this letter. If you're interested, it might be worth seeing. I recommend going up on the roof for the best view of it. Try not to break anything. I cannot have that kind of karma on my conscience.

That is really great about the cow, Chairo-chan. While it's exciting to know that the animal residents of the compound are thriving, maybe we should try to save valuable page real estate for other things. Such as people, people we know and like - more specifically you. And that is coming from a man who likes cows, horses, chickens, crows, and insects as much as the next guy.

It's cold. There is snow but we are managing. I am checking Kaminari's feet every day and don't worry the other horses' feet are also being looked after meticulously. Thank you for the tip. One lame horse can bring it all down. See what you've made me do? I've talked about animals for two paragraphs now.

I appreciate your authentic, honest, and unfiltered self. I will happily deal with it. With a smile. So that way it's clear that I'm doing so happily.

I want to ask you a question and since it is writing I feel some of the pressure is taken off since you can reply at your leisure. When I come back, I would like to have a cup of tea with you. Outside of the compound. Just you and me. Please tell me your thoughts on this. I await to hear back.

Sincerely,

M

P.S. I will always write back.

Sakura looked up from the letter she had read no less than five times - his handwriting could not be solely blamed for the reason - at the large, blood moon overhead. There was ample light for her to make out the characters had she not memorized it anyway. She pushed her lips to one side as she contemplated what she had read and re-read. And read again.

"A cup of tea…" she let her voice and thought trail. She hugged her arms to her. She knew what she saw. Minori was safe. He was in love with Kushina. There was no prospect of anything real or concrete. He had already given his heart away. And humans only had but one heart. He was not like the Master, who if Tomoha could be believed - and she did - said that the Master was already in the process of finding a new wife. She had been naive. Love was not merely a burden for the poor but it was for the rich too. Maybe he was not looking to remarry for the love of a wife but for the love of a mother for his son. That was something she could wrap her mind around. Because of the love that Tomoha spoke to her and the one she transcribed for Naruto's stories, that kind of love could not be duplicated or mass-produced. That kind of love only happens once in a lifetime if someone is lucky. It was the kind of love her parents had. It was the kind of love that her aunt and uncle had. It was the kind of love that Minori had for Kushina.

'Has. The kind of love Minori-san has for Kushina-sama.' She corrected her inner monologue.

Sakura shook her head. There was no use spinning around in one spot indefinitely. She exhaled all the stale air that felt too heavy from her lungs. She inhaled deeply, almost feeling the weight of the air as it moved through her body.

She jumped at the dark sky being engulfed in a blinding white light. She scrambled to her feet. Her heart in her chest rumbled nearly as loud as the clap of thunder overhead. Her hands shook as she moved down the metal ladder, she froze and pressed up against it as another bolt tore the sky. She peeled herself off the wrung and moved down as quickly as she could. She only paused once to gather her sandals in her hand as she ran for shelter.

She just missed the heavy downpour by mere minutes. It was unforgiving and completely unexpected. The rain, wind, thunder, and lightning were her unwelcome company all night long.

Minato kept his raw, split-open, chapped lips pressed together firmly to keep the string of curses running through his head where they belonged. They pressed up against the small vale between the snow-covered mountains. Mountains that were being whipped and doused in a white flurry. The blizzard raged in front of them. They were safe from the blistering winds and the blinding snowstorm. Safe but unable to move forward or back. Nature raged war on either side of them.

His cobalt eyes never stopped moving. His garrison was large, the valley was small. The horses were restless and the men wary. A pack of snow was growing larger and larger and it would only be a matter of time before the rock gave way. Water always ended up winning. No matter what form: ice, vapor, or liquid. What was needed for life was also merciless in the pursuit of death. They had already lost three horses carrying their food hours ago. The men they were able to save. Morale would tumble down to where the horses had if they found themselves at the mercy of another avalanche.

He narrowed his eyes to a small opening. His mind thought back to the map, the map of the Land of Fire. The sun was obscured but he had a rough idea of their current direction. He had not completely turned around yet. He pulled on the reins of his horse, leading him to the small tunnel. Kakashi rose to his feet from his huddle.

"If we stay here we are as good as dead." Minato declared without emotion, without fear, and without panic. It was just a statement of gruesome fact. They had left footprints for Iwa and their hired mercenaries to follow. If the snow did not wipe them out first. "We'll take the Akuma Pass."

Kakashi narrowed his eyes. He had words. Words he wanted to have with Minato but on account of their current predicament and how voice carried and echoed off the chambers of the mountainside, he could not. He had to settle for using his eyes to convey his disagreement. The name of the road had the word 'devil' in it. That should have been enough of a deterrent for most. But he was not most.

"Single file, walk your horses. It will add a couple of hours to the journey but in the end, we will be at the first base faster than if we waited." Minato's voice was unyielding like steel. He heard clambering as men began to gather their packs and reach for their reins. A path parted for him and the white steed as he made his way to the entrance of the narrow cave. Just a head taller than him and wide enough for a man and his horse.

"We'll rest once we've cleared the pass." He looked over his shoulder one last time before he entered into the belly of the devil.

The journey was mostly a silent affair. The cave was dark and damp. The floor was slick with melted ice. The walls rattled and shook when strong gusts of wind hit the sides of the mountain. The path was winding and narrow. A handful of the men experienced panic attacks due to the feeling the walls were caving in. There were a plethora of offshoots, of all the paths that could be taken, each one beckoning, calling tired travelers to their ultimate demise. To be lost and become one with the earth of the past.

They said nothing as they walked through the skeleton remains of all those who tried the same road they did, with the same intentions they had. They did not need to. The grim faces cast in lantern glow - for every third man since they could not risk running out of air- said everything to them. Each life that followed him whether it be human or beast - was his responsibility. He carried the weight of that on his shoulders. He held high with a confidence that he faked as much as he projected. The map, the map he had only seen a handful of times burned in his mind. A red path stood out amongst all else. He kept his feet on that path. Hoping and praying that his memory did not mislead him.

It was only when they saw the light at the end of the lateral tunnel that Minato released the breath he was holding. A clearing, encompassed by tall trees that seemed to block out the sky greeted them. The sounds of some of his men falling to their knees and taking handfuls of snow to their faces registered in his ears. Gratitude to be out in the open air. Sounds of relief and exuberance.

Minato turned his head ever-so-slightly at the clap at his shoulder. Kakashi's dark eyes mirrored the emotions Minato felt. They exchanged a knowing glance. They moved to the trees to set up camp.

"What are you doing?" Kakashi asked him with crossed arms and a curious drawl.

"Birch," Minato muttered, rubbing his hands along the misleadingly smooth bark of white trees with gray rings. The leaves were long gone. The trees stood naked and exposed in the snowy expanse.

"I didn't want to say anything back there but are you alright?" Kakashi leaned forward. "Is our little friend here with you still?"

"She's gone," Minato did not let up from rubbing the bark of the tree. His eyes clouded in deep thought.

Kakashi let out a sigh that he had been holding in for two days now. "Good, looks like the poison has finally left your system. It's more than mildly concerning that Iwa even has such a thing. They can kill us without killing us."

Minato shook his head. "I wasn't poisoned." He pulled out a small knife from his waistband. He slid it open with a level of ease and comfort that only came through repetition.

"Um…okay?" Kakashi shuffled on his feet. Concern was back on his features. "Then what was that?"

"She was a manifestation of my subconscious born out of my guilt which was made possible by lack of sleep because of my highly stressed state." He answered smoothly as he pried his knife into the bark. He cut a rough rectangle from the tree.

"I'm sorry, your what?" Kakashi was just a step removed from being gobsmacked.

"My guilt," Minato pulled the second bark from the tree, ripping it and tearing it away. He sniffed the inner bark. It was a lighter shade of brown, almost blond compared to the rest of it.

"I need more context," the Hakate watched closely as the Namikaze tore off a chunk. His eyes widened when he saw Minato bring it to his mouth and chew. "What in the name of all that is holy are you doing?" He struggled to keep his voice down.

"Eating," Minato answered. He held out a sliver of bark. "Want some?"

"No!" Kakashi battled his hand away. "Explain before I declare you insane and take over." There was no amusement in his tone or expression, only seriousness.

Minato sighed. "Birch is edible and is perfectly safe. We are about half a day from any village or town where we can regain some of our lost rations. We've been hungry for two days already. This will hold us over."

"Oh," he did not sound convinced. "How do you know about this?"

"Sakura," Minato said after some deliberation.

Kakashi looked around him. He pointed over his shoulder. "Is she standing right next to me?" He flailed his arm in the air like one does to dissipate smoke or recently passed gas. Which he would not put past Kakashi. Naruto learned all his fart jokes - much to Sakura's dismay - from the Hatake.

Minato rolled his eyes at Kakashi's melodrama. "She told me back at the compound when the staff was still starving because of Shimura-sama's greed and my negligence." He ran a tired hand through his hair. "She was eating this stuff to keep the hunger at bay."

"I see," Kakashi lowered his eyes at the pinched lines of Minato's face. "And you're not lying to me?"

"No, I'm not lying to you." Minato held his gaze.

"She left just like that?" He pressed.

"Not just like that. I made a decision." Minato tore another piece of bark and chewed it like it was dried salted meat. This time when he offered a piece, Kakashi took it and slid it into his mouth.

"It's not terrible," he surmised. "It's like wet sawdust." He concluded.

"So wood?" Minato leaned back against the tree and stared lazily at the tents and fire that were scattered around the small clearing. Aside from where they came from, there were no obstructions to their vision. The mountains and blizzards were behind them.

"What did you decide?" Kakashi asked while flexing his jaw. "Kind of rough on the swallow. Can I get splinters?"

"Chew more," Minato advised. "I decided that I'm not going to lie to her anymore. That's why I saw her. I felt guilty but I ignored it. I was lying to myself. You were right. I used her. I don't want to use her anymore." Minato pinned Kakashi in place with a heavy gaze. "I know what you were trying to do."

Kakashi scoffed. He ran his tongue along the walls of his mouth checking for splinters. "Took you long enough." He sighed in a long-suffering manner. "Now I know what kind of man you take me for." He rubbed his jaw.

"I'm sorry I punched you," the blond said with a sigh.

"No, you're not," Kakashi rubbed the back of his neck. "I kind of deserved it." There was a very real valid reason why he avoided engaged and married women. And it had nothing to do with morals and everything to do with the fact that they usually came with angry husbands. This was the first time he got punched in the face by an angry 'nothing'. But he learned his lesson. It would be his last time. Maybe he needed to change his rule to no 'attached' women. It seemed more encompassing. An umbrella policy of coverage, of sorts.

The Hatake looked down at his hands. "So you decided to come clean and she left?"

"Hm," Minato nodded his head. "I forgot to be lonely when I was with her, 'Kashi. Or sad." He looked up at the tangle of tree branches that hung overhead. "That was the default state ever since Naruto was born. Ever since Kushina died." His eyelid closed heavily over his eyes like a curtain sown from sorrow and loss. "I didn't remember anything but loneliness and sadness."

"Until her," Kakashi's voice was soft and almost timid.

"Hm," Minato opened his eyes. So much was being contained in their depths.

"You know how this sounds right?" The silver-haired man asked rhetorically.

"Crazy." He paused. "I know."

"What does all this mean?" It was not often - rather it was rare - that Minato was so candid and open like this. Usually, it took no less than five shots of Miharu's truth serum to get his lips to be so loose. So Kakashi was not going to let this rare opportunity pass without somewhat of an interrogation.

"I don't know," Minato admitted freely. "I don't know. All I know is that I'm starting to picture a life after this war. What it will look like when we're back home, and she's a part of that picture."

Kakashi swallowed thickly. Minato did not need to say more. He had referred to the compound as something for the first time in over five years. Home. He called it home. That said everything. Minato was just slow on the uptake. It seemed like he had more stuff to figure out still.

"I feel crazy. It feels crazy," the blond watched his breath vanish into nothing. "It's only been a little over two months."

"You fell in love with Kushina the moment you laid eyes on her. Two months is a lifetime compared to that." His words sat heavily in the air.

"I don't know about love," Minato lowered his gaze to his boots. "But she is important to me. To Naruto. I just don't want any more lies and secrets between us. And what comes from that comes."

"Minato," Kakashi rubbed the back of his neck. His thoughts swarmed the inside of his head like angry hornets. "You're her boss. You have all the power, Minato."

Minato closed his eyes. "I know."

"You hold her life in your hands." The words moved through shards of broken glass lodged in his throat. "She might feel pressured into forgiving you, into doing what she thinks she has to in order to keep her job and the roof over her head."

'And to provide for her family.' Minato's subconscious which mercifully sounded like his own voice added on.

"Your explanation and apology might be one hundred percent sincere and genuine but it is hard to think that her response will be. It's not equitable. The nature of your…relationship." He crossed his arms in his continued pursuit to be the voice of the reason.

'I know my place.'

The blond's jaw clenched. He swallowed thickly. "I can only hope that she knows I'm not that type of person where she has to worry about retribution for her honesty."

"Minato," Kakashi sighed deeply. "You'll be admitting to lying to her face every day that you've known her. Every day that she's known you. She doesn't even know you. The real you. How could this possibly end well for you? For either of you."

"She knows me." He insisted. "I can't keep lying to her. It's gone on long enough." The general's voice was tight. "I'm done lying to her." He shook his head. "I can't be Minori anymore."

"You're prepared?" Kakashi asked the question that he probably should not ask, especially now given what was required of them tomorrow. Complete and utter dedication to the cause. "For the outcome?"

"I am," Minato said with a decisive nod.

"Damn," Kakashi put so eloquently. Encompassing everything buzzing in his head in a compact utterance.

"We better not die tomorrow," Minato smirked. "I can't carry this bad karma into my next life."

"You'd probably come back as a roach," Kakashi agreed with a nod. "Or an Iwa samurai, something as equally annoying and hard to kill." He added after giving it another thought.

Minato's hearty laugh brought a smile to Kakashi's face. It had been far too long since he heard that sound from Minato's throat.

"Come on, let's get some of this bark to the men." Minato slung his arm around Kakashi's shoulder.

"Maybe it would be more merciful to let them starve." The Hatake muttered darkly under his breath.

"Are we going to visit your boyfriend?" Rin asked entirely too innocently to be believable.

Sakura shot her a look. "I will turn around."

"Juna-san used to say that the horse-man was your boyfriend. Is that true?" Rin's eyes sparkled with interest. She tucked her hair behind her ears. She had come a little too far out of her shell if someone asked Sakura.

"He has a name," Sakura said with a scowl.

"So it's true!" Rin beamed.

"No," Sakura shot back. They wove through the bustling streets of the village. "Keep your voice down." Sakura hissed at her.

"Kai-san said that the mailman liked you too, what was his name again?" Rin tapped her chin as if deep in concentration.

Sakura rolled her eyes. "You should know that Kai-san is a horrible source of information."

"I know," Rin smiled sweetly. "Miharu-san said the same thing though." She clapped her hands. "Lee-san!" She exclaimed as the name came to her.

Sakura accidentally stepped on her foot causing Rin to cry out in surprise. Sakura smiled apologetically at the fourteen-year-old.

"So mean!" Rin pouted. The expression did not last long. It was gone and so was her mood. "I can't wait to be older. Falling in love sounds so amazing." Rin gushed. There were practically stars in her eyes.

"Careful what you wish for," Sakura muttered under her breath darkly as she led the girl by the shoulder.

"Oh!" Rin pointed in excitement. "A dango stall. They have anko too! I've always wanted to try it." She looked up at Sakura with excitement dancing in her eyes. "Can we go? Can we go?" She tugged on Sakura's kimono, not unlike a child.

Sakura eyed the line. "Maybe on the way back, Rin-chan?" Her heart sank as the smile on the girl's face did.

"Okay," Rin gave the stall one last long look over her shoulder as they continued to make their way rather hurriedly to Sakura's destination. The last planned stop for the day. Rin's purchases were tucked safely into a bag that Sakura had given her.

Sakura held open the door to a building painted blue. Rin slipped inside first. Her eyes darted all around, unsure of where to settle. The bottom of her jaw hung open as she took it all in. the books, the jars, the organized shelves, feathers, scales, feet, claws, dried herbs, garlic. There was so much visually to take in. She could spend hours and there would still be more to discover.

Sakura let the girl revel and marvel in it all uninterrupted. She made her way to the counter. She smiled at the girl with dark hair that almost looked purple under certain angles of the light.

"Anko-chan, how are you?" Sakura asked in a warm tone.

The girl blinked slowly at her. She held up a finger before disappearing into the gap in the wall. Sakura was not fazed. She just concluded that Anko preferred to use no words where she could. She ran her blunt nails along the wooden counter, her eyes scanning the shelves as she waited.

His head of gray hair was the first thing she saw. A few seconds later it was the warmth in his eyes.

"Sakura-san," he greeted her with a smile and a nod.

"Yakushi-sensei," Sakura returned his greeting in a similar manner. Rin came to stand next to her. She smiled shyly at the man. Sakura thought she saw Kabuto's eyes dim for a second but it had to be the trick of the light. "This is Rin-chan," Sakura placed a protective, encouraging hand on the back of the brunette's shoulder.

"Hello," Rin held up her hand in a timid gesture. Her eyes were on Anko's impassive expression.

"Nice to meet you, Rin-chan." Kabuto's smile was bright and light. "This is Anko-chan," he gestured to the solemn girl.

"I know," Rin muttered into her shoes whilst tucking hair behind her ear.

Kabuto's eyebrows shot up in clear surprise.

"She came to find you when Minori-san opened his stitches. That day you weren't here," Sakura explained. "Anko-chan gave Rin-chan bandages."

"I see," Kabuto's smile was back on his face. "Wow, that feels so long ago."

"It does," Sakura agreed with a small laugh. "Time does go by so much faster the older you are." She looked at the clock. "Speaking of time, I am running a bit behind on my chores for the week. I can't go to the clearing. I'm glad I was able to catch you before you set out."

Rin moved down the counter, looking at all there was to look at. Anko mirrored her movements on the other side of the divider. Sakura watched them from the corner of her eye.

"And…" Kabuto let his question hang in the air, not quite up to interpretation. He subtly gestured to Rin. The two girls were conversing in low tones.

"We both needed a couple of things and a break from the compound." She reached for the coin pouch. She offered the first of what was her meager savings. As she wanted to wait a couple of weeks before she started to reduce the amount of money she sent back home. He slid them over the counter and put them in what she could only assume was a toll box.

"Thank you," he leaned on his crossed forearms towards her, hunching forward so that they were more or less at eye level. "I was beginning to think you're avoiding being alone with me."

Sakura did not engage with the comment. She did not know how well her ability to weave half-truths and denials would be with him peering into her soul the way he was.

"How is your Otosan doing?"

"I haven't read the latest letter yet," she rubbed her arm as she answered. She was more than a little scared if she was being honest with herself. Her eyes fixed on the rich grain of the wooden counter that rested between them.

"I'll be back in Hacho in a few weeks to gather supplies. I'll make time to check in on him. But you should keep me posted too in the unlikely event I need to examine him sooner."

"Thank you, Sensei." She offered him a small and soft smile. "You're giving my family something we thought we lost a long time ago. Hope."

"I'm sorry about your brother," his eyes and lips dipped in sympathy.

Sakura sighed. She was not surprised. Her mother brought up Haruma like she breathed. He was her greatest accomplishment after all. Her biggest source of happiness and pride. A son. His memory was in large part what kept that woman going. Every year, she celebrated her son's birthday. On the day the candle was lit and only the wind or the lack of wax put it out. He burned too bright for this world is what her mother would say on good days. She would claim he was taken by a demon on the worst.

"Thank you," Sakura looked down at her hands.

"Please do let me know if there is something that I can bring with me for your family on my next visit."

"The strength rations that I was planning on making him - the ones I shared the recipe of - they would be safe right?" Kabuto nodded his head to her question. "I might have time to make some more between then and now. If you don't mind…." Her father was not in pain anymore. He did not need her painkillers so she improvised a new ration that used more or less the same ingredients prepared in a different way so that they served a different purpose.

"Not at all. I would be happy too." Kabuto smiled warmly at her. "You can thank me later."

A line appeared in between her brows at his casual statement. The look of momentary confusion pulled into a slightly forced smile. She reminded herself that he was just awkward and a little strange.

"Rin-chan," she called over to the girl, tearing her eyes away from Kabuto's pull. "Ready to go?" The brunette bounded over to her side, Sakura's arm settled over her shoulders. She was not sure for whose benefit more. Rin nodded. The pair said their goodbyes to the sensei and his assistant. Sakura repressed her shudder until they were out of eyesight from the numerous windows that lined the shop.

"Cold?" Rin linked her arm around Sakura's waist preemptively.

"A little," Sakura squeezed the girl's shoulder affectionately in thanks. "So," her voice trailed off into a grin.

"Dango time?" Rin looked at her with anticipation.

"Dango time," Sakura was all teeth as her eyes sparkled with mirth. "And since you did such a good job of accompanying me, it's my treat."

"Really, Oneechan?" Her face was bright with a glow that could only be described as radiant.

"Really," Sakura tapped the tip of Rin's nose soliciting a pleased giggle from the teen.

The pair fell into line by the stall. Sakura blew hot air into her hands.

"Have you had dango before?" Rin's eyes scanned the blurry faces of people walking by and those in line. There were five people in front of them.

"A couple of times," Sakura was seconds away from jumping in place to keep warm. "When I was a kid. Younger than you. Around Naruto-kun's age. Never had dango with anko though. I'm excited to try it for the first time."

"Me too! I think I like sugar." Rin said with an innocence that broke Sakura's heart.

"I think I like sugar too," Sakura tried her best to mask the strain in her eyes. She made a mental note to try to do this more often than once every three months. "It's getting close to our turn," she exclaimed in a mix of relief and excitement. A hint of warmth from the stall was just starting to move across her face. The smell of the dumplings was more pronounced.

She turned her head slowly to the left when she felt a pair of eyes on her person. She spotted dark raven eyes locked in their general direction. A boy no older than Rin, his mouth hung slightly open as he all but gawked at the brunette.

'Looks like a Uchiha,' Sakura thought to herself as she took his pale skin and dark features. The red and white fan on the chest of his dark blue kimono eliminated all doubt. It matched the fan composed of diamonds and rubies that had hung from Mikoto's neck. He was completely oblivious to the fact that she was on to him just as Rin was in a bubble of her own blissful ignorance.

'I guess it's true. Kami does not hesitate to answer the prayers of the pure-hearted.'

She made note of the position of the sun in the sky. Yes. They would have to come to this stall more often.

Dear M,

You sir, confuse me to no end. What in the world could we possibly hope to gain from drinking tea together? I have an aversion to putting myself in scenarios where I embarrass myself if I can help it. But I am also trying to keep an open mind. Hence, the question. Why?

I'm looking at this page thinking how am I going to fill it now? But this is your letter. Fine, we won't talk about the cutest boy in the world. Your loss. I had so many stories. I'll just have to tell you in person. I don't want to hear excuses then.

Do you ever get scared out there, Minori-san? It's a stupid question. One that might inspire a stupid answer which I am prepared wholeheartedly to read. It's just that lately…it would help to know if you do get scared. It would make me feel better. Not that I'm happy you're scared! It would just help me feel less of a coward.

Things at the compound are okay. I saw Juna-san's baby the other day. He looks completely different than the day he was born. It's amazing. And his face will continue to change. His eyes are now closer to the shade of his father's. They went from blue to hazel, to brown now. They'll be leaving soon. I know you said not to talk about other people but there's only so much I have to work with. I'm okay though. I'm happy for Juna-san and her family. I'll be okay. I am okay.

I tried anko dango for the first time. It was delicious! It was only because of Rin-chan that I felt brave enough to go for it. It's funny, isn't it? It took a child wanting to have some for me to realize that I didn't need to ask anyone's permission other than my own or to have a special occasion to try them. It was a nice moment. Hanami is still my favorite. I guess it's a classic for a reason.

A while back, I saw a head of yellow hair. It was like I had no control of my body. My feet were following after it before my brain even knew why. I followed him for a solid minute before I came to my senses. I felt like such a fool. I'm not sure why I'm telling you this. Maybe we could share a laugh at my expense. It was rather funny in a pathetic sort of way.

There! I filled the page. Maybe next time I'll figure out how to do it without bringing other people into the mix.

I hope you are well. I pray that you are safe.

Sincerely,

Sakura

"What do you say?" Rin's enthusiasm was hardly contained. She peered at Anko's face expectantly. "Want to go get dango with me?"

Anko pulled her sleeves down over her wrists. Her unsure frame had the brilliance of Rin's smile diminishing. Sakura did not miss the way Anko's eyes had darted over to Kabuto who was poured over a book.

"Sensei," she drew his attention from his task. "I could help you in the shop while Anko-chan and Rin-chan get a snack. A little break now and then boosts productivity, does it not?" Her voice, face, and posture were demure as she made the suggestion.

"That's a great idea, Sakura-san," Kabuto smiled at her before sharing that same smile with Anko. "Go have fun, Anko-chan."

The girl hesitated, unsure of what to do with three pairs of eyes on her person.

"You're burning daylight, girls," Sakura clapped her hands. "Off you go!" She all but shooed them from the store. The sounds of Rin's giggles, as she led the girl out by the wrist, lingered in the air.

"You're a persuasive one, aren't you?" There was a twinkle in Kabuto's eye as she regarded her.

"Sometimes," Sakura said with a bashful chuckle. "It's come to my attention recently that it is nice to have a friend your age. Someone to talk to, it's pretty rare to come by." She thought of Mikoto and how she was counting down the days to see her again.

"That it is," he regarded her with something unnameable in his eye but Sakura missed it. Her attention was on what was under his hands. He followed her gaze. "Would you like to see?" He turned the book before she had a chance to answer.

Her eyes moved from top to bottom and right to left as she read. Her green eyes blinked at him in surprise. "You write?"

Kabuto nodded his head. "I do my own research and transcribe my findings. Anko-chan is a great help in all of this."

"Wow," she marveled. "That's amazing." It truly was. She was impressed even more so.

"Surprised?" His eyebrows were arched in a teasing manner.

She felt her face flush at the knowledge that she was so transparent. "A little," she regarded the text of the partial sentence. "Guess I never thought about it. But now that I think about it, it makes sense. You make your own medicines and you treat all kinds of patients. It makes sense that you have experiences and knowledge to share, to spread, and to teach."

She tapped her finger to the name at the corner of the page. "Who is Orochimaru?"

"My shishou," Kabuto answered breezily. He held up a scroll. "He taught me everything I know. Well, mostly everything. This is a study that I am running. There is a lot of overlap with one of his old ones. I'm referencing his notes and findings."

"I see," her eyes glittered with fascination. "So I suppose that in a way, Orochimaru-sama is my grand-sensei?"

"Something like that," Kabuto's smile faltered slightly. Before she could ask him about it, he was speaking again. "Want to come back on this side of the counter?"

"Can I?" Sakura asked with an enthusiasm that was not unlike Rin's.

Kabuto lifted the divider in response. Sakura slipped through. She tilted her head to the side as she picked up the book. "Is this real?" She frowned.

Kabuto nodded his head. "Orochimaru-sama was trying to find a way to bring lame limbs back to life. To train the brain to utilize living nerves to remap the network of nerves in the patient's spine." He stated casually as if it was not a groundbreaking undertaking.

Sakura gaped at him. "Through the use of fire? And other means..." She furrowed her brow. The graphic diagrams made her blood run cold. She flipped through the pages almost frantically. "That sounds incredibly painful and extreme. For the very low chance of success. It's a terrible trade-off."

"It is," Kabuto said agreeably. "But you and I cannot judge what is worth it and what is not. We have all our limbs and we are in full control of them."

"Still," she could not help but deepen her frown.

"Desperation is quite the motivator." Kabuto's eyes dimmed as his voice grew distant. "Hope is a dangerous thing."

"People really volunteered for this?" Sakura found it hard to keep her judgment and dread from bleeding into her voice. To her, the study was nothing short of a torture session with the label of medicine. "They subjected themselves to this?"

"They did. Each and every one." Kabuto answered in a grave voice.

"Did it work?" She flipped through the pages.

"A couple of patients regained mobility up to twenty-five percent."

She took half a step back from the book as she was brought back down rather suddenly. Her stomach lurched. "You were referencing this study?"

"Hm," Kabuto closed the thick cover. "For your father's treatment."

Sakura's eyes widened. "What?" Her heart stopped.

"I wanted to study the prep medication that Orochimaru-sama had administered to the patients. It is his patient formula that he worked on for over two decades. It increased virility. It makes men stronger."

She gripped the counter. "You referenced that? For my father." She asked for clarification. Her left ear started to ring.

"I drew inspiration from it, yes," Kabuto answered without concern for the look on Sakura's face. She had lost color. "My goal is not to make your father strong enough to withstand a taxing and frankly barbaric procedure. My goal is to merely encourage his cells to heal faster. And Orochimaru-sama's formula when used in moderation encourages the body's natural healing rhythm to expedite."

Most of what he was saying and not saying was over her head. She simply did not know enough to corroborate or contradict his claims. She did not know what to think or what to feel.

"Okaasan said that Otosan is doing really well. That his appetite is back. And that he can even sit up for most of the day now." She ran her fingers along the spine of the book. "She said that he's doing really well. So well, that I was - am - skeptical."

The letters from home were coming in weekly now at Sakura's insistence. Her father just started a new treatment. She wanted updates sooner rather than later. Two weeks was much too long to go between contact. Thankfully her mother did not fight her on it.

"Your father was in excellent condition when he was injured. And your Okaasan takes very good care of him. His diet is balanced. He has good genetics. He is young. Even I am surprised at the rate at which he responded to the treatment." Kabuto was smiling at her. "He is the ideal patient."

'Ideal patient.' She nearly shuddered at the way it sounded in her head.

Sakura took a breath. "It's natural?" She searched his eyes.

"It is completely natural." He assured her. He even went as far as putting his hand over his heart. "It's non-addictive and non-habit forming. And it has been tested."

"For two decades?" She walked the line of skepticism and gratitude. It was her father. How could she not be protective?

"For more than two decades." He answered patiently. "It's safe. It's not experimental. There will be no pain." He paused. "You can trust me, Sakura-san. I intend to take the pain away, not cause it."

She closed her eyes and exhaled slowly, she let his conviction wash over her. He was steady when she was so unsure. She took in his kind expression. "Thank you, Sensei." She looked around the room. "I didn't know treatments could be leveraged like that. There is so much I don't know and understand." She bowed her head. "I'm sorry for all the questions and hesitation."

"Don't be," he smiled at her. His eyes twinkled. "The line between beneficial and detrimental is thin. It's good to be questioned every now and then. It makes us assess where we're standing."

"Do no harm, right?" She chuckled sheepishly. She felt her face grow hot under his scrutiny.

"That's good. It should be the official motto." He grinned easily. He bent down. "Here," he pulled some scrolls from under the counter. "I think you'll like these."

"Really?" Sakura's face lit up as she opened the first of the scrolls.

"Really. You'll be able to answer your own questions in no time." He watched as she began to devour the information at her fingertips. "Next week I think I'll start teaching you how to read and balance equations."

Sakura nodded her head absentmindedly. "Sounds good, Sensei." Her eyes moved down the scroll rapidly. She was so engrossed with reading as much as she could that she did not even notice when Kabuto's arm brushed up against hers in a ghost of a touch.

"So good," Rin gushed as she pulled the last of her dango to her mouth from the stick. "I could eat like ten of these things."

"Your teeth would fall out." Anko pointed a skewer at her in a bored manner.

"Worth it," Rin stretched her arms over her head and let out a yawn.

"Are they working you too hard?" Curiosity shone in black eyes with a purple tint.

Rin shook her head. "Sugar makes me sleepy." She blinked her eyes a couple of times. She took a sip of her green tea. "The sun feels nice." She tilted her head up as if to catch as many of the rays on her skin as possible, to store the warmth away in her cells for a rainy day.

"I prefer the cold," Anko pulled at the ends of her sleeves. She checked the small scarf around her neck with mindful fingers.

"That's a pretty pattern," Rin pointed out kindly. Making conversation. Trying desperately to get some traction on this budding relationship.

"Thanks," Anko seemed to shrink at the praise. Her eyes turned hard and her expression became stony.

"Um…" Rin's cheery smile became slightly more forced. "So what do you like to do in your free time?"

"Sleep."

"Oh! Me too. I love taking naps. I wish I could take them as regularly as Naruto-sama." Rin chuckled. "Nothing beats finding a perfect sunspot and a light blanket. But I guess you like being cold…so…." Her eyes darted around as she tried to find something to talk about.

"I guess I like eating too," Anko said with a shrug.

"Me too!" Rin beamed. "That's actually how Sakura-oneechan and I became close. She would give me her food! We get enough now so she doesn't have to do that anymore."

"Do you like her?" Anko leaned against the brick wall covered in ivy. Her expression was cold and calculating a stark contrast to what Rin was projecting.

"Who? Sakura-oneechan? Yeah! She's the best. She's so nice. She taught me how to read and write. She looks out for me." Rin answered happily, polishing off the rest of her hot tea. She felt very grown-up for having finished the bitter liquid.

"If she's so great, why does she hang around the Sensei so much?" Anko muttered mostly to herself.

"What?" Rin furrowed her brow.

"Nothing," Anko said quickly. She pulled her dango stick from her mouth. She gestured with a jerk of her head to her right. "That guy keeps staring. Do you know him?"

"What guy?" Rin looked around. The look of curiosity slipped off her face for a neutral expression when she saw a boy staring at her with the full weight of his focus. Rin shuddered. "No way! He's weird," she said perturbed. She did not even think he blinked once in the time she was looking at him.

Anko stuck the stick back in her mouth. "Do you want me to go beat him up for you?" For the first time, Rin saw something other than boredom, contempt, or unease in Anko's dark eyes.

"No," Rin shook her head adamantly. "Let's just go back." She grabbed Anko's hand and tugged her along. The two of them ran back to the Sensei's medicinal shop away from the curious pair of dark eyes, missing the scowl on the teenage boy's face.

Sakura,

Sharing a cup of tea is not out of the ordinary among friends. There will be plenty to talk about. Just like the mornings we spent back at the compound. Only at tea, we won't be surrounded by the cold or the smell of a stable. If you're really that worried, we can spend the whole time talking about nothing but cows, chickens, and horses. It will be fine. It will be fun.

I'm really glad that you did something for yourself. For once. It is a momentous occasion. I wish I was there to properly mark the occasion. At the risk of you getting mad enough to not write to me, I will keep my teasing to a minimum when it is in the form of writing. I make no promises in person. Consider this your fair warning.

The other day we came across frozen deer carcasses in the trees. It means that a mountain lion was nearby. Don't worry about our safety. They never attack anything in groups. See what you've made me do? Your obsession with creatures has rubbed off on me. I wasn't like this before we met.

I get scared all the time. I am scared of dying. Not for me but for those I care about. Fear keeps me grounded. Fear keeps me alive. It keeps me from taking unnecessary risks. And being reckless. Fear is essential in life. You're only a coward if you let fear prevent you from pursuing what you want. Fear should be a motivator, not an obstacle. That's just my philosophy anyway.

If you're scared of something or someone in particular, talk to Ambe-san. She will listen. She acts prickly but that is just a front. She has a really soft heart. If you tell her I said that, I will deny it until my dying breath. If you show her this letter…I will still deny it.

You're not crazy. I find myself doing a double take more than once every time I see a flash of emerald. The evergreen leaves remind me of your eyes. I can't help but look. Even if my brain knows there is no possible way that you can be here. I have to look. I have to check. I'm glad you told me that you followed that poor man. It makes me feel better. I hope one day you'll feel comfortable enough to tell me anything because I find myself wanting to hear everything.

I am alive. I am well. I am safe. Take care of yourself, Sakura.

Sincerely,

M

The air was thick. He could taste it. It carried a current that increased the rhythm of his heart just enough to be noticeable. He was cognizant of each heartbeat and breath. At times like this, the still before the chaos, he feels the most alive. Because the possibility of death reminds him that he still draws breath. The only other time was in the arms of his beloved. Time stopped, he saw it all clearly. His strategy, the rain of arrows that awaited the suspecting stronghold, the blood that would be coating his armor never really leaving the leather or the steel. It all raced through his head like a memory. Only it was a memory that he had yet to make be.

The chorus of bows being pulled taunt rang in his ears. Not one string was out of place or time. He drew his sword. A symphony of metal clicking free of its confines followed. Dark navy eyes narrowed through a helmet that obscured much else. The leather reins of his horse were clenched tight in his left hand. He dug his heels into the sides of the stallion. It neighed to life. The wind slammed against his face as he sliced through it, closer and closer. Thousands of hooves pushed the ground after him with equal force by less speed. Not even Chidori, who too was named after lightning, could keep up with Kaminari. No one and nothing could keep up with them.

A guttural cry rose from somewhere behind him. Soon many voices joined in until everything blended into just one loud, angry, exclaim. The sound could drown oceans. Arrows flew. Arriving before any of the horses or men. They embedded into the brick exterior of the base, into a soft eye socket, and into the gaps of armor. Body feel. They propelled forward.

He slashed his way through not thinking twice. There was no hesitation. If his eye saw an enemy crest, his sword tasted blood. It was that simple. It was black and white with an ocean of red. Frozen faces as he cut them down with the unforgiving edge of his sword. Minato pulled the reins harshly and his brain finally made sense of the chaos. The white stallion against the snow turned pink with blood stopped.

Minato held out an arm. His katana was parallel to the ground. He looked at a sight he was not accustomed to seeing. Backs. Backs presented to him and his army of death. Bows still taunt with arrows held steady. Blades held upright as the landscape settled.

"Did they just…" Kakashi's voice filled with disbelief broke free from the barrier made up of the still.

"They're retreating," Minato pressed his lips together until they were bloodless.

"What…what do we do?" Kakashi's question posed in a dubious manner was not the only one. Murmurs broke out about what should be done next. "We can't shoot them in the back can we?"

"No," Minato said with a decisive air. "Check the base. Be careful of traps." His voice was as grave as the graveyard the grounds had become for countless soldiers.

Kakashi nodded his head. With a tug and a click Chidori and a handful of men broke off from the main group to do just as the general had commanded.

The first base was won back and in record time. Less than five minutes was all it took. Something had shifted. He had seen it on their faces. The fear. The horror. The realization. That they were facing their end.

Minato narrowed his eyes at nothing in particular. He peered off into the direction the Earth and Waterfall samurai had disappeared. To the west beyond the border that was disputed. The orders of the Shogun rang in his head: Follow after them. The grip around his reins tightened until his knuckles were white.

"Get me the official bird." He said into the air.

"For the Shogun, sir?" A voice directly behind him called out.

"For the Emperor." General Nimakaze answered over the pin-drop silence.

A/N: How did you guys like hallucination Sakura? How does she rank in comparison to sober and drunk Sakura? It was so fun to write her that way. So free and just open. Anyways please review. Thank you! 3