Rose

The rest of the day was a blur of packing, gathering, and organizing. I realized pretty abruptly mid-packing that I did not have a bathing suit, much less any bikini to speak of. Which was troublesome considering that we were spending two weeks on a private beach. I supposed that we would have to stop somewhere on our way, only to look up as Liss entered my room, packages in her arms looking smug.

"Looking for something?" she asked, smirking. Dropping the packages on my bed.

"Okay, that's freaky. How did you know? Does the bond work both ways now?" I questioned, eyeing her suspiciously before picking up the packages and placing them into my bag unopened already knowing that they held the aforementioned bathing suits.

She gave an ironic laugh, "No Rose, I just know you. And you haven't been in a pool since the ski lodge." She explained self-righteously.

"No, that can't be it," I countered, teasing. "Vision and prophecy must be a new manifestation of Spirit. And you must have seen me running naked on the beach and had to act quickly on the behalf of mankind everywhere." I ducked just in the right moment as a pillow went soaring over my head.

"That's not very ladylike, you know. How very un-princess-like." I laughed as she crossed her eyes and stuck her tongue out at me.

"Fine." She answered, reaching for the packages, "Be naked for all that I care".

"No!" I cried, diving on top of my bag to protect its contents, smiling.

She laughed, "I'll take that as a thank you."

"You're going to love the one in the purple bag," she continued, waggling her eyebrows at me for emphasis.

I laughed again, "You know if it's see-through that it's lingerie and not a bikini, right?" I eyed her, trying to skim her thoughts through the bond to see just what trouble she was trying to get me into.

"Oh no, you don't!" She laughed, throwing another pillow at me, and blocking me from her thoughts, "You'll just have to wait until we get to the beach".

I sighed in mock exasperation, catching the pillow before it could smack me in the face. "You're no fun," I complained good-naturedly, "Besides, when did you become so good at blocking the bond?" I questioned.

I had originally believed it had been me in my attempts to numb my feelings that had numbed the bond, but now that I thought about it, Lissa was able to keep this trip under wraps for months with me being none the wiser. Any numbing on my part had never been lasting, if she hadn't been intentionally been hiding something, I would have known well before today.

She shrugged nonchalantly, "Adrian and I actually figured it out by accident a few months ago," She explained, "He's been trying to teach me how to dream walk, which is always just me meditating, and I discovered that I could sense where the bond is in my core, where my magic is…" She trailed off, getting a distant look in her eye.

I considered all of this quietly. I had certainly missed out on a lot of big things as far as Lissa's personal accomplishments went. They weren't physical things or noticeable accomplishments that she bragged about to anyone, but I should have known.

"Can you sense my thoughts then?" I prompted, making the logical assumption.

"No," She sighed, clearly somewhat bothered by that. "I can't sense you just that the bond exists within me. I am not sure if that makes sense?"

I nodded, understanding. Privately relieved, so much of me was available to what felt like the world. The safety of my thoughts remaining mine gave me some peace of mind.

"I haven't felt much darkness coming from you," I commented instead, tilting my head sensing the usual calm and tranquility coming from her.

She nodded, smiling again. "It's because it hasn't come back lately, the meditation helps a lot of things."

I smiled in return, pleased by the happiness that radiated from her. She was happy here, in our home, living with Christian and our hodge-podge group, attending classes and events at PSU. She felt free and normal for the first time in her life.

The deal she had struck with the Queen in order to cultivate our lives here was one of complicated balance. Neither was truly happy with the arrangement. In letting the Dragomir heir move away from court, forgoing Lehigh to attend a much larger university, Lissa had agreed to spend her summers at court studying Moroi law and being at Tatiana's beck and call. With the second semester of our freshman year rapidly winding down we would be looking at making the move back to court in less than two months. I figured reminding her of this would only serve in dampening her bright mood.

"Hey," Lissa asked suddenly, changing the direction of our conversation, "What did you get on the last psychology paper?"

"An A," I answered absently not looking up, working through what else I would need from my room for a 14-day beach trip, "… It was a pretty low one though."

Getting only silence, I returned my attention to Lissa to see her mouth slightly agape and a look of mildly offended astonishment on her face. "What?" I questioned, confused by her reaction, the paper she was referring to was not one of significance. We had reaction papers due bi-weekly for our intro to psych course, we read the text and reacted to it- pretty basic stuff. We had submitted our last one of the semester on Monday.

Feeling a moderate amount of alarm at her continued silence, I waved my hand in front of her face to get her attention, "Why, what did you get?" I pushed.

Breaking from her trance, a small smile formed at the corner of her mouth erasing her surprise, "I got a B," She answered quietly, bemused shock evident in her tone.

"That's not so bad, your grade is plenty high enough and can withstand a B, Liss. Besides, we still have the final in a few weeks." I encouraged, still trying to decipher the reason behind her shock.

"Rose!" She laughed, "We worked on that paper together! How did you get a higher grade?" She asked in bewilderment, whacking my shoulder with the pillow she still held in her lap.

I smirked back understanding, "Maybe if you spent less time on dates with Sparky, you could have gotten an A too." I teased back, laughing as she scoffed.

"Technically, you were on that date too!" She quipped.

I grimaced at the insinuation of me actually participating in a date with her and Christian and she laughed. She wasn't wrong. I had technically been there, but in the role of her Guardian and not as a third wheel like she had made it sound. It had been a simple date on a cloudy Sunday evening, they had gone out to dinner and ice cream then a walk in the park. Darren and Eddie had been there too. Eddie and I had been posing as a couple as well, as we often did to provide the best level of nondescript protection and privacy that we could offer. Darren was almost always in the role of far Guardian due to his age and absolute massive frame, he made it difficult to blend in without notice.

Still frowning I answered in defense of myself, "Yes, okay, technically, but afterward, when we returned home, I wasn't nearly as, erm, busy." I returned, emphasizing my point and grinning wickedly at her.

Lissa's pale complexion immediately reddened at my innuendo and she promptly whacked me with the pillow again forgoing a response.

Grabbing the pillow from her as it hit me, I threw it back at her and burst into laughter as it hit her squarely in the face.

"Oh, real mature, Rose." She huffed, smoothing her platinum hair back into place not entirely able to hide her amusement. Through the bond, I could sense that the little exchange had deeply tickled Lissa despite my razzing. She nearly radiated joy and her feelings rose as she noticed me studying her.

"You have done amazing in classes, you know." She complimented, and I could feel the pride she felt for me through the bond.

I smiled and rolled my eyes in return, feeling uncomfortable with the praise.

She scoffed again, "Rosemarie Hathaway, maintaining a 3.5 GPA at a four-year university is nothing to roll your eyes at." She admonished in her best parental tone.

"Sure thing, Ms. 4.0." I shot back smiling and taking the attention away from my academic achievements.

"Rose, I'm serious! You should be proud! You've worked so hard!" She enthused, not liking that I was dodging her praise.

I groaned, "I just have more time to focus on school now, that's all!" I looked away knowing that I sounded a little too defensive, not wanting to get into why my grades had so drastically improved since high school.

I knew I had impressed her along with everyone else in the house with how seriously I had taken school since coming to Penn. State. There were multiple reasons behind this shift in my personality and none of them had anything to do with a renewed appreciation for academia. Before, school and grades at the academy hadn't seemed important to me. With the exception of my novice classes, anything that didn't involve becoming a Guardian hadn't interested me. But now that I was Lissa's Guardian, I needed to maintain my grades to keep up with her. It was one of the additional requirements that the Queen had slipped into her agreement with Lissa. Lissa couldn't attend classes at PSU if I couldn't. It was my personal opinion that the Queen bitch didn't think I would be capable and saw it as a way to keep Lissa close to court. I wouldn't give her the satisfaction. Lissa didn't deserve that. She deserved to be free.

A secondary and much less important reason was that I often found myself putting in extra time for studying and school work when Lissa and Christian sought time alone which served the twofold purpose of distracting myself enough as not to be pulled into her thoughts as well as keeping my own jealousy and self-pity at bay. Not sleeping had also given me a lot of time for studying.

Lissa frowned at me but didn't push the subject.

I was reminded of my conversation with Dimitri before breakfast. Talk to your friends. I sat quietly for a moment as I thought. He was right. Keeping everything to myself was weighing me down, I had begun to panic at the idea because it was impossible to know where to begin, but I could see in this moment that if I continued to reject any semblance of conversation about myself that I would never get anywhere. I could start simple, but not if I kept letting these moments pass me by.

I sighed and offered her tired smile, "Sorry, Liss. I'm just trying to keep up with you." I admitted, knowing that I was still trying to navigate around the conversation.

Lissa's frown deepened, "Is that what you're worried about? What the Queen thinks?" She questioned, trying to understand.

I shrugged, struggling to formulate an answer, "Yes and no? I don't know."

Lissa laughed quietly, still confused. "Rose, don't worry about Tatiana. I can take care of that much, and if you are killing yourself over grades because of that…"

"It's not just that," I answered, cutting her off, "I have more time because I don't sleep well," I admitted in a rush of words.

Compassion for me and what I've been through flowed through the bond and showed evidently on her face and I mentally cringed, waiting for the accompanying pity, but it didn't come.

"I know." She answered simply, smiling kindly. "And before you blame Adrian," She said, holding up her hand to ward off the protest I had been about to deliver, "It was Eddie. It was hard not to notice that you weren't in your bed most nights, and Eddie mentioned that sometimes you would sleep in his bed or Adrian's." She shrugged, not thinking it unusual that I sometimes shared beds with our closest guy friends. She didn't have to wonder. She knew it wasn't like that. My coping methods had varied greatly since moving away from the academy and in the last several months I had discovered that I could manage a few more hours of sleep if I wasn't alone when I woke. Neither Eddie nor Adrian had commented on the development. I felt the prickle of tears in the corner of my eyes.

"It's okay, Rose." She said soothingly, knowing that she was on unsteady ground. After Dimitri left had been the last time that I had opened up to her and she didn't want to make me shut down by saying the wrong thing.

I shook my head again, feeling the tightening grip of panic. "I'm sorry," I repeated, not sure whether I was apologizing for not knowing what to say or not talking to her sooner.

Lissa closed her eyes and breathed deeply, I could feel her send waves of calm to me through the bond and I was surprised when it actually worked. My heart rate slowed and the urge to leave the room ebbed away. I studied her with astonishment as she reopened her eyes and smirked.

"I've picked up on a thing or two recently." She answered with smug satisfaction.

"Is that Spirit?" I questioned, delving deeper into the bond to investigate.

"No, it's me." She answered still smiling smugly. "Just like you can pull darkness from me, I can heal it from you."

I felt as my mouth popped open in shock, "… I don't know what to say, Lissa" I uttered sounding as dumbstruck as I felt. The sudden implications seemed endless and my mind whirled, I was initially suspicious that she could sense me through the bond, but I could see that she had been entirely honest with me about that. What she had done was focus on a deep sense of calmness that she had centered within herself and pushed it into me.

She laughed, "There's nothing to say, Rose. This is the first chance I've had to try it. It's a hypothesis I've had for a while, but it hasn't worked, well, until now. You're not the only one who has been studying." Her smile was one of pride and I found that it was impossible not to return it.

"Thank you," I told her, not sure how I felt about this new development. Mostly, I didn't want her to suffer the negative consequences of any Spirit residuals, but at the moment, it didn't seem like there were any. I would have to remember to keep tabs on that.

"Don't thank me, at least not for that," she said waving away my praise. "You can thank me after your try on your new swimsuits." She answered, beaming at me.

I laughed then, feeling light. Much like the feelings that I had sensed from Lissa.

We settled into an easy stream of conversation after that never staying on a single topic for long. We reminisced over how quickly our freshman year was winding down, how much neither of us was looking forward to going back to court, all the while making plans for shopping when we got to the beach. Lissa helped me finish the remainder of my packing before securing my help in gathering the snacks and drinks for the road into ice chests, both of us basking in the soft glow of each other's presence. By the end of it, I had thrown my single duffle bag next to Lissa's suitcase by the door for Darren to load when he returned with our rental van. Destin, with no stops, would be a 16-hour drive. With it being Saturday, we were hoping to make it to the beach house by sometime Monday morning. I knew that when the group returned home, we, the Guardians, would gather for tactical planning. Our vacation wouldn't begin until we arrived, we still had a lot of work to do. I was sure with me being kept in the dark for so long that Darren and Eddie had already outlined a schedule for us. Four Guardians traveling with four Moroi felt like good odds, but with eight vampiric creatures traveling in a passenger van for nearly two days, something was bound to happen. The more we planned the smoother the trip would go.

The morning had quickly slipped into the afternoon without much notice. Lunch had come and gone and the others still hadn't returned from the morning feeding. A text from Christian let us know that they had decided to grab lunch out after Adrian insisted on a "quick" shopping outing. That man was far too impulsive, which was comical coming from me, he'd have an entire trip wardrobe by the end of it, I was sure. With Darren gone, Lissa and I found ourselves back in my room lounging on my bed. It was like old times before either of us had been in serious relationships and our biggest concerns had been which party we'd go to that weekend. I worked hard to remain rooted in the moment, to not remember that a lifetime had passed between that moment and this one.

I found myself marveling over how relaxed and at ease I felt, it was like coming up from under water.

The conversation stayed light for the most part, I questioned her on her Spirit practice sessions with Adrian. She explained her progress with auroras and frustrations with dream walking. I wanted to know more about how she planned the trip and how she had managed to keep it all a secret for so long. She was very smug in that regard. About a month ago she had discovered how to "plug" the bond for short periods of time as she had explained earlier, but before that, she had used classes as a distraction, our calculus class in particular. She did most of her planning when I went running in the afternoons when she figured I'd be most distracted, and any time she felt herself thinking about the trip around me, she distracted herself, and me by proxy, by practicing equations which was a very effective way of keeping me from her mind.

I groaned, that calculus class was going to be my first C in college and I was very proud of that C too. "Maybe I should have paid attention when you did that, my grade would probably be higher."

We both laughed at that, math would never be a strong suit for me. Lissa had even generously put us through tutoring on my behalf.

Talk lulled then, and I could tell through the bond that we both were brought to a standstill by the next logical strain the conversation would take: Tasha and Dimitri…

I was the first to break the silence with a sigh. She wanted to apologize but was conflicted. She stayed quiet, knowing that I was examining the bond and she let me.

Lissa saw Tasha's timing of contacting Christian two weeks ago as a happy accident. It wasn't something she would have done herself, but now that it had happened, she was relieved. She had recognized that it was an inevitability from the beginning and for the first time since we had come to Penn. State, I was given a glimpse into just how calculated our move had been. Lissa had invoked just about every privilege she had available to her as the Dragomir heir after graduation, and she had done it all with no selfish motives to be found. Some of this I had known, but to see the full extent of her planning was eye-opening. She had walked a precarious line of superimposing her will over the Queen's and had won in the end. She covered our tracks and was given top security clearance by the Queen herself. We were living in Pennsylvania with the rest of the vampiric world being none the wiser… until two weeks ago. That was the one part of her plan that that had never sat right with her, separating Christian from Tasha… but she hadn't seen another way especially upon the discovery that Dimitri had accepted an offer from Tasha. Her thoughts shifted then, there was an unspoken question to her thoughts, she wanted to know if she had done the right thing…

I remained quiet for a few more moments, separating myself from her thoughts and thinking back to the first few weeks after graduation when we had been at court. How I had felt like I was drowning. I had known part of what she was up to, but at the time I hadn't cared. My only thoughts had been to get away, to escape, so I didn't ask questions, whether it had been Lehigh or Penn. State I had just wanted to be away, but now I could see how that silence had hurt her. How she had been in constant doubt since that moment. She had wanted to help but was worried that she had only hurt more people in the process…

"Liss," I began but hesitated. She rolled to her side to face me and I did the same, her thoughts were once again closed to me but I could still easily read the anxiety she felt. "I think we all did the best we could with a messy situation." I finally offered, unsure how to put my thoughts into words.

She frowned slightly, considering my words. "Do you think you're better here than you were at court?" She asked slowly, phrasing the question carefully.

"Being here has been good for me," I assured, knowing that was the reassurance she was looking for. I wasn't sure I would be "good" in any place, so I figured my answer was as close to honest as I could get.

She smiled, seemingly content with my response and I answered her smile with one of my own. Maybe one day I'd find the words to explain it to her, but for now, I contented myself knowing that I had done better today than I had in the past ten months combined.

With the bond closed again, I was completely caught off guard with her next line of conversation. Logic would dictate that I should have seen this one coming, but hindsight is always 20/20…

"…So," She began haltingly, her eyes flickering around my room. My apprehension beginning to build at her inability to meet my eyes.

"Please tell me this is not another secret, Liss. I don't think I could take another surprise. I really don't." I pleaded slightly, only partly joking.

"No, it's nothing like that…" she admitted, forcing a smile. She had something weighing on her mind again, and even with the bond closed to me, I was aware of the trepidation she felt. Awkwardness curled within her, mixing with a sense of hurt and confusion.

This had been what I was always worried about, once the conversations began opening up there'd be no stemming them. If someone were to ask me about the battle directly or to say the wrong thing, regardless of how well-intentioned, I knew I would shut down and could do nothing to protect them from that happening. My trauma was so clear to me in these moments of one-on-one conversation. I never had acknowledged until this morning how hard I had worked over the past year to avoid being confronted, so much was beginning to unravel. So, I waited, my anxiety rising for her to ask whatever it was that she was wrestling with, praying that Dimitri was right… that it would be worth it and that I could trust my friends.

"… there's a lot you did not tell me about…" My stomach had nearly bottomed out before she hurried to continue at seeing the rising panic wash across my expression, "When Guardian Belikov left… I thought that had been it. I knew that you two had dated briefly, or something close to that, and that you had to keep it a secret but… from what I saw yesterday, this is a bit more serious than just a quick fling that ended badly... that day, in my dorm, you said he broke up with you. You said that you hadn't been together for long… " She finally murmured, her gaze settling on mine.

I could hear the note of exasperation in her tone, well-hidden as it was. She was thinking back to yesterday and how the sexual tension between Dimitri and myself was tangible enough to cut with a knife. I cringed mentally, steeling myself.

There was indeed a lot that Lissa did not know... She felt like she was owed an explanation. She felt betrayed, she thought she had known. That I had already told her everything that day in her dorm. She had known that Dimitri and I had dated briefly before graduation in secret, but I could never bring myself to tell her that it had been so much more than that. To Lissa, Dimitri, and I 'dating' involved us sneaking kisses between training sessions. She had no idea of the scope of our relationship and how far back it went. To say that we had just dated felt cheap in comparison to what Dimitri and I had had, and, at the time, I had wanted desperately to protect that part of myself for just a little longer. So much of our relationship had taken place outside of the time between the battle and graduation. Lissa was under the impression that our relationship had been brief and that I had been more upset over the fact that he had left his position as her Guardian, especially after the battle… I really only had myself to blame for this one.

I took a deep breath considering her. Had we been back at the academy I might've gotten angry at the insinuation that she was owed the information. But she was trying, and as I looked to her so much had changed between then and now. I remembered how many times I had wanted to tell her, how something had always come up, how new her relationship with Christian had been… I could understand how she felt. I knew every detail about her life regardless if she had wanted to tell me or not… she felt let down. Like I didn't trust her. The time for secrets was ending. Now that the flood gates had been opened, it was getting too difficult to avoid the truth. It would be better this way… I hoped.

"I think I would have eventually told you had things been different, but I didn't have a chance to tell you. And then afterward… I could barely think about it much less talk about it…" I attempted as an explanation, knowing that I was falling woefully short.

Her expression remained soft and encouraging, but I could tell that she still felt hurt. She didn't understand.

"It wasn't just between the battle and graduation, Liss," I admitted, holding my breath.

Confusion knit her eyebrows together and I sighed. "I think I fell in love with him within the month we returned to the academy, but nothing had really happened until the night of the dance when Vikor Dashkov had kidnapped you…" I explained hedging around the details of my love life with Dimitri, hoping that she would start putting the pieces together. I couldn't bring myself to outright say it, for so long this had been a secret Dimitri and I shared. "I didn't think he felt the same…"

Finally, Lissa gasped her eyes going wide, "The compulsion charm!"

I nodded, "It wasn't a charm that made me necessarily attack Dimitri…"

Lissa gasped again this time scandalized. "You lied under oath!" She accused.

The incredulity of her face was too much for me, I couldn't help as the laughter overcame me, covering my face in an attempt to muffle the sound. Of course, that would be the detail she would be most concerned about, not the illicit love affair between a student and her mentor.

It was a moment before Lissa joined in, realizing the absurdity of her reaction.

"Wow," She stated after a moment, staring at the ceiling in disbelief.

"Yeah," I surmised, knowing the feeling. It still didn't feel real to me. Her shock was evident through the bond, her thoughts were everywhere. She had a million questions, but she finally settled on one.

"So did you two ever…?" Her face flamed red as she addressed the ceiling, she was too embarrassed at the thought of Dimitri and me together to finish her thought aloud. She still hadn't resolved herself to the idea of Dimitri outside the role of the fierce protector and authority figure. But after yesterday she was being forced to reconsider. Dimitri's intensity ran much deeper than she had ever thought to consider. Her blush deepened.

"Oh yeah." I couldn't help but snigger as she flustered further at my answer,

"Before graduation?" She asked fully scandalized now, sitting up to look at me, forgetting her embarrassment in the face of the salacious news. It felt exactly like we were 16 again. In a way, it was what I had always hoped this conversation would be for us.

I followed suit, bumping my shoulder into hers teasingly, "I think you already know the answer to that one." My face hurt from smiling so hard, never would I have imagined being able to have this conversation post-graduation with a smile on my face. This wasn't a conversation that would have been possible for me just two days ago.

"You would choose the most epic way to lose your virginity, wouldn't you?" She asked, both scandalized and impressed.

We both laughed then, leaning heavily into each other as the laughter shook us.

It was then that Adrian walked into my room wasting no time in throwing himself down onto the bed between Lissa and myself, effectively ending our conversation and laughter, for the time.

"Ladies, a pleasure as always," He greeted us, smiling broadly as he glanced between us, "Please do explain the joke, I'm in desperate need of a good laugh after lunch with the Cowboy of Boring."

Lissa and I groaned simultaneously. She quickly rolled off the bed and away from Adrian.

Rolling her eyes she ventured, "Is everyone back, or did you ditch them to bring in all of your stuff?"

Adrian tended to play spoiled royalty when there were visitors. He apparently felt the necessity of keeping up his persona. By the sounds of it, more people were entering the house.

"Believe or not there was not much "stuff", as you so callously put it, to bring in. And to think there are even surprises for you." He answered stiffly, eying her back, not appreciating her tone. "And yes, as a matter of fact, Darren just pulled in behind us with the van. The Dhampirs are loading up now."

With a final eye-roll and a knowing glance in my direction, Lissa departed to see what was happening upfront. Just as I was getting up to do the same, Adrian caught hold of my wrist. Bringing me back down on the bed beside him.

"Not so fast, Little Dhampir. Stay awhile." Adrian coaxed, batting his lashes for effect. I snorted but smiled nonetheless.

I considered resisting and pulling away, but I knew that would only serve in injuring his feelings further. We hadn't had the chance to catch up and with the way things had ended between us last night with him storming off with the whiskey, I didn't feel it was fair to leave just yet. We were off-balanced for the first time since we had moved to Penn. State. The easy friendship we had so far maintained felt strained and distant all of a sudden, and we both knew why.

I let him coax me back down to the bed so that we were both lying shoulder to shoulder gazing up to the ceiling of my bedroom. Adrian's hand sought mine and I reluctantly let him. With our hands clasped between us, I found that the gesture once familiar and easy felt odd and confining.

"How are you?" He asked quietly, looking at me from beneath his lashes. This wasn't our nature. Adrian and I didn't "talk it out", we laughed and we teased and we pretended that nothing was wrong.

I looked away, not like the intensity of his gaze. "Fine," I answered.

"Come on, Rose." He cajoled, "What's the plan?"

I frowned, using turning to my side to face him as an excuse to pull my hand back.

Undeterred, Adrian followed managing to position himself even closer. I sighed, moving my face away to allow room for conversation.

"Adrian, what plan? There is no plan. We are going to the beach…" I answered despite knowing what he was getting at.

I would need to nip this bud and quickly. His possessive nature was showing and it didn't sit well with me. I had tried so many times to have this conversation with him, but he would have to listen this time.

"You can't seriously tell me that you are okay with him coming with us?" He asked, the accusation clear in his voice.

Feeling annoyed, I tried to maintain a sense of calm. "Maybe not at first, but it'll be fine. We agreed to be friends." I admitted even though it grated on my nerves to do so. It was none of his damn business. All the same, I didn't want to hurt Adrian. He had been nothing short of salvation for me the last several months and I greatly valued his friendship.

I could tell by the pensive look on his face that he'd been about to deliver a heated response when Dimitri stepped through my open bedroom door.

His eyes landed on Adrian and me on the bed, and I saw his foot falter just a moment as if he'd been about to step back out. Too late and having been already noticed, Dimitri straightened his shoulders and cleared his throat, offering an awkward apology.

I immediately sprang to a seated position, feeling embarrassed to have been caught lying so closely with Adrian. Adrian too sat up begrudgingly, much more slowly than I had.

"Knock much, Belikov?" Adrian grumbled slyly, pretending to straighten his mussed hair.

Dimitri's gaze settled on Adrian with an ironic arch to his brow, his eyes moving from the open bedroom door and back but nonetheless repeated, "My apologies".

"We were just talking," I explained, working hard to tamper the blush rising to my cheeks.

Dimitri only shrugged without meeting my eye, "I'm just here for the bags." He explained gesturing and moving towards the three duffle bags gathered next to my nightstand.

"Here," I offered, jumping up from the bed in a rush to hide my embarrassment, "Let me help."

"I've got it, thanks." He answered, having made it to the bags before I could. He was out the room and down the hall before I could think to insist, and it was to my complete horror that he shut the door behind him on his way out. Covering my face with my hands, I groaned. Great. Just great.

Adrian hooted with laughter and I quickly spun to face him, my anger spilling out. "You don't get to do that."

I watched as his face moved from amusement to confusion, "Do what?"

"Taunt him like you know a damn thing about us." I snapped; my tone icy.

Anger settled in his gaze then, "Oh it's us again, then? Don't flatter yourself, Rose. The big secret isn't so secretive." He mocked, trying to use humor to control his anger.

Adrian had been one of the few, outside of Victor Dashkov, to have caught onto the relationship between Dimitri and me very early on. I hadn't forgotten that, but I also didn't expect him to throw it in my face. Especially now.

My nostrils flared, "Excuse me? I am truly failing to see how any of this is your business." I felt as if all of the blood was being drained from my body and I was carved from stone. Beginning to talk about the relationship I had once shared with Dimitri was one thing, but being mocked for it? I bit my tongue in an effort to control the rage that sang within me. I would not snap at Adrian, I refused.

Seeming to think nothing of the danger that lurked in my tone Adrian continued the conversation we had been having before we were interrupted, "Please try to give me some credit here, Little Dhampir. You've been grieving over what happened for months. Don't let him do this to you. Not again. He shouldn't be here."

It was the exact wrong thing to have said. It happened all at once and too quickly for me to know what was truly happening before I had already done it, I walked up to Adrian and slapped him. Not even hard enough to leave a mark, but the action alone was resounding enough, "You know nothing," I whispered harshly, "I watched him die. I watch it every night." I stepped back. Shaking, working hard to hold myself together and ignore the deafening pound of blood in my ears.

He wasn't entirely wrong. I had been grieving, but not in the way he thought.

"Rose…" Adrian began, his hand still pressed to his cheek where I had hit him. He was sorry, I already knew that. I held up my hand, warding off his apology.

"Please don't. If I had wanted to tell you I would have. If you are going to be my friend, then be that. I can't handle this right now."

I swung around then, leaving Adrian standing alone in my room. I had hit my limit for the day and it was a wonder that I had managed to speak at all.

In my haste to leave my room, I ran smack into Darren. His arms came around me automatically, catching me before I stumbled. "You alright?" He asked with a surprised grunt as I wrapped my arms around his waist in a hug.

I laughed weakly, sighing at my stupidity but unable to deny myself the momentary comfort. "Yeah. I'm good. Couldn't pass up the opportunity when it presented itself. You're just too hunky," I explained jokingly.

He laughed shortly in response and returned the hug briefly before stepping back, only to reveal Tasha hesitating in the hall behind him. My stomach fell, but she had quickly turned around and was gone before either of us could acknowledge her.

"You're a weird one, you know that, Hathaway?" He asked, mussing my hair when I didn't immediately respond. "I was just coming to get you," Darren continued, recapturing my attention, "We wanted to meet before we left, you ready?" I nodded my head in acknowledgment before following him to the kitchen. I had an uneasy feeling in my stomach. Something about the look on Tasha's face after Darren had hugged me was unsettling, but I would have to think more on that later. Eddie and Dimitri were already sitting around the island in the kitchen. A few sheets of paper and a manila folder sat between them. In an effort to remain focused, I didn't even bother trying to meet Dimitri's eye. I found it hard not to notice, however, that his eyes had slid completely over me as I entered the room. It shouldn't bother me but it did, he had no right to feel any kind of way about what went on between myself and Adrian or the complete lack thereof.

Boys, I fumed silently. Were they all the same? Deciding better of it, I smirked in Dimitri's general direction. Let him wonder.

A/N: I am no longer making promises for what the next chapter of the story will entail because clearly, this brain baby of mine has a life all of its own. I thought this chapter was an important inclusion because it helps clear up some needed background information. I'm a detail orientated person and I just can't seem to stop myself. I pushed some details to allow this chapter to happen. Apparently, this little fic of mine is going to be longer than originally intended. I'm a sucker for long fanfictions anyway. Buckle up, kiddos. It's getting bumpy ;)

I want to point out that this story is canon compliant through Shadow Kissed (with exception of the end, obviously.) Anything that happens within canon post-Shadow Kissed is not within the characters' universe. For example, no one knows that Abe is Rose's father because she never went to Russia to restore Dimitri. Jill is just a student at St. Vladimir's who is unaware of her royal parentage. I do plan on including some of this, but clearly, since I am telling the story with an alternate ending to Shadow Kissed the events will unfold a little differently. That's right this is not a situational fanfiction, it's what would have happened if Rose had saved Dimitri. To be clear, I love the original stories. Blood Promise is honestly my favorite novel from the series. Rose is such a strong character. I love every detail of how Richelle Mead told VA with the exception of Tasha being made into a villain. That's just one trope that I could never get behind, and maybe it was because I was older when the last novel came out. Alright, I'm rambling. I'll stop procrastinating a continue chapter 11. Be good people. More drama coming soon and, if the benevolent gods of fanfic are willing, they will be on the road. (Cross your fingers for me.)

I have to thank those of you who have been loyal to this story. I value your support so very much. 10 chapters is a pretty big accomplishment for me, and if you've been following along you know that it has been quite the journey. Writing isn't always easy for me, but I enjoy it so much. I try and I just want to say thank you for being here.

Always love to hear your thoughts. What do you think Tasha is going to do? Couldn't have everyone being so buddy-buddy before they depart on the trip ;)

-Blue