"Hold still," Buffy advised as she placed the finishing touches on Liam's suit.
Liam rolled his eyes at his mom while she yanked his bow tie straight. Though Liam was excited to be back home in Sunnydale after he moved to LA with his mom, the circumstances were less than ideal.
"Perfect," Buffy smiled, smoothing down Liam's jacket. He was a spitting image of his father. And now it was time to deliver to his father. "Come on, let's go see if your dad is ready for you yet."
Buffy took Liam by the hand and led him through the halls of the church. Liam tried to look at all the pretty paintings and stained glass windows, but it was sensory overload. Buffy headed onward full steam towards her destination. Of all the churches, he and Kate picked they had to pick the same one she was supposed to get married in. On top of that, the wedding date was the exact same and Kate's dress was an identical copy to Buffy's.
Buffy knocked twice on the door before entering. She did not want to catch Angel or any of his groomsmen with less than appropriate attire.
"Come on in, pet," Spike greeted, opening the door for the mother and son duo.
"Who's at the door Spike?" Angel questioned fidgeting with his tie before locking eyes with his ex. "Buffy."
Buffy stood there silently, suddenly self conscious of her dress as Angel's mouth hung agape. Angel had lost his train of thought as he stared at Buffy. She wasn't wearing anything that should have elicited this response, but seeing her in a simple light pink dress sent shivers down his spine. Like always, she was breathtaking.
"Get a room," Spike commented, breaking the tension between the ex lovers.
"Liam's dressed and ready, so I thought you would want him here with you since he's the ring bearer," Buffy explained, brushing off Spike's latest comment. She guided Liam in front of her to be passed off to Angel.
"Yeah, that's great. Thank you," Angel said. "Liam, why don't you head over there to Uncle Xander and he's going to show you what to do while I talk to your mom."
Liam nodded. There was no stopping the wedding now it seemed. In less than an hour his dad would be married, but it wouldn't be to his mother.
With Liam occupied by Xander explaining the importance and duties of the ring bearer, Angel gestured for Buffy to head out into the hallway with him. "How's LA?" Angel asked.
"Great. I love my job and Liam's adjusting to school quite well. He's made a lot of friends there, but it isn't Sunnydale. He still misses home," Buffy explained. Liam wasn't the only one missing Sunnydale. Everyone she ever cared about, besides her son, was there...her mom, Giles, Willow, Xander, and Angel. "He misses you a lot."
"I know I missed a few phone calls and I was meaning to call back, but I was on this case and I wanted to get everything sorted out before the wedding-" Angel rambled. He felt extremely guilty for not picking up Liam's latest phone calls. It's just that he had been swamped at work and had time to barely even think about himself or the wedding.
"Angel, you don't need to explain yourself. He understands that you're a busy guy."
"But I shouldn't be busy enough to not make time for my own kid. It's bad enough I missed the first five years of his life and now I'm missing more because I'm in Sunnydale and you're in LA."
"I-" Buffy tried to come up with an excuse but was lacking in finding one.
"It's okay. I'm not mad at you. It's just...that...sometimes I wonder how we got into this mess. This wasn't how I thought my life would be."
"Well, me either," Buffy spat. Here she was sympathetic to Angel's problem, but he never once acknowledged how this was for her. Did he think she wanted to be a single mom and having to watch the love of her life marry another?
Angel picked up hostility in her tone, something that was not commonly found in Buffy's demeanor. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Buffy pursed her lips tight. "Nothing."
And now she was lying right through her teeth at him. She rarely acted this way towards him. There was maybe only one other instance he could recount where Buffy behaved in such a way. "You don't have a nothing face, you have a something face. Tell me what's wrong," Angel demanded as his cool-headedness slowly faded.
"Do you really want to know?"
"Yes, I think I deserve that much."
"And do you know what I deserve? I deserve to be the one walking down that aisle today. Not her!" Buffy admitted. Angel jumped back at the passion in Buffy's voice which did not seem to diminish. "So don't you dare stand here and say that this is not how you imagined your life would be because by the looks of it you've gotten everything you wanted. You have your son, your soon-to-be wife, and your future children with here. All I have is Liam. All I will ever have is Liam because the only guy I've ever saw a future with is getting married. This was supposed to be my life. Today was supposed to be the happiest day of my life. Instead, it has became the worst." Buffy wiped a few tears from her eyes as she caught her breath. "Now, if you may excuse me, I have a wedding to attend."
Buffy walked away continuing to fight back the flood gates. She never meant to go off on Angel like that. In fact, she had planned to go through the entire day grinning and baring it. So when she turned the corner and was out of Angel's sight, she sank to the floor and allowed herself to cry months of bottled up pain.
Angel, on the other hand, stood frozen in the hall. He knew had must of hurt Buffy by being with Kate, but he didn't know to this extent. She had always been strong and to see her break down before his eyes nearly killed him.
He loved her. There was no doubt about that.
Yet...he was getting married to another woman whom he also loved.
When he opened the door, he almost knocked over Spike, Wesley, Doyle, Xander and Liam in the process. The four and a half men were lurking by the door listening in to his conversation with Buffy. How could they not, none of them had heard Buffy raise her voice like that, not even Liam.
"What are you guys standing around for?" Angel questioned. "We have a wedding to get to."
Buffy sat in the farthest pew back.
Willow had found Buffy crying in the hall, ten minutes before the ceremony was about to commence. She had held Buffy in her arms as Buffy cried into her shoulder. Willow had even offered to ditch the service with Buffy, but Buffy insisted that they should stay. Once Buffy saw Angel get married, then he would be out of her system for good, she argued. Willow knew that would not help matters, but she supported Buffy's decision even if it was the wrong one.
With Willow on her one side and her mother on the other, Buffy was back to grinning and baring it. She watched as Angel, his groomsmen, and Liam filed in and stood next to the priest. Buffy tried to avoid Angel's gaze. It was too painful, besides she didn't need a reason to start breaking down in the middle of church. She was vulnerable, her face still red and her eyes puffy.
Then the bridesmaids began to enter, something to keep her eyes off Angel. Cordelia and Faith were the last ones to enter, signaling to Buffy and everyone else in attendance that Kate was about to make her grand entrance.
Buffy could not deny that Kate looked beautiful and that dress did suit her well. It was just a pity that Buffy never got the chance to wear it.
Angel watched as his future wife walked down the aisle. She was gorgeous. He knew he had the biggest grin on his face as she approached him. When he took her hand and his and looked into her eyes once more, his grin vanished. The woman he saw walking towards him wasn't the woman he was to marry, but instead the woman he promised to marry a long time ago. Angel shook off a feeling of regret and plastered a smile on his face, but it wasn't the same.
"Dearly beloved," the priest began.
In that moment, Buffy couldn't take it. She had to get out of there. "Willow, I don't think I can do this," she whispered.
"Do you want me to go with you?"
"No, stay," Buffy insisted. "I need to be alone right now." She grabbed her purse and jacket and slipped out the back, hoping not to get noticed. No one did notice, the only being her son who was visibly miserable standing next to his father.
"Do you Liam, take Kate to be your lawfully wedded wife for rich or for poor, in sickness and in health, till death do you part?" The priest asked.
Angel looked down at his son, who seemed enthusiastic about the marriage to begin with, and then looked up in the pews for Buffy. Noticing her disappearance from the crowd, Angel looked at Willow for confirmation.
"She left," Willow mouthed.
Angel turned his attention back to his eager fiancée. "Kate," Angel began. "You deserve someone who can give you their full heart and I've only given you half. I'm sorry, I can't do this." Angel freed his hand from Kate's, loosened his tie, and walked down the aisle alone.