Hey!
More Detective Tyrion for you :)
Chapter 4: Red Herring
Half an hour later …
Gates of Buckingham Palace, London
"Bronn let us through, it's an emergency!" Tyrion pleaded at the man blocking their entrance to the King's birthday celebrations.
"You aren't on the guest list," the non-uniformed detective said sarcastically, leaning back on the bars of the gate.
"I know!" Tyrion exclaimed in exasperation, keeping the other police officers in his peripherals, "There's a bomb inside."
"Come off it, I know you like a party Tyrion but that's not the way you're getting in," Bronn snapped, knowing his colleagues were taking an interest in his animated conversation with the dwarf.
"He's not lying Detective," Jaime instated, keeping a hand on Cersei's arm who was entirely consumed with staring at the glamoured-up partygoers walking past them and into the grounds of the royal palace.
"You owe me!" Tyrion piped up, "If it wasn't for me, you'd have been kicked off Scotland Yard years ago!"
"Yeah, mainly for helping you out on your little investigations!" Bronn thundered back but Tyrion held his ground and their little spat was beginning to attract more and more attention.
"Little?! I've caught more murderers in the past year than your entire department has in a single decade!" Tyrion barked before refocusing with great effort, "Bronn, I'm being serious."
"How do you know it's a real threat?" Bronn relented.
"Our sister built it," Jaime interjected.
Bronn shifted his eyes to the blond lady, who was nodding at Jaime's words while contently watching the flow of people around her like a child seeing something for the first time. He knew her history. Knew she wasn't all there in the head.
"She's supposed to be in the Sherringford facility," Bronn grumbled, accepting something weird was afoot.
"Yes, she is," Tyrion said sweetly, "Very suspicious that she isn't, isn't it? Now let us pass or half of London's high society is going to snuff it."
"Fine," Bronn waved them through, "But if something goes wrong, you're on your own and you never saw me."
"Good man!" Tyrion skipped past him, joining the advancing crowd of elites making their way into the calendar event of the year.
"Divide and conquer?" Jaime suggested as they reached the palace garden that was hosting the King's celebration.
Jugglers, waiters, fire performers and guests were milling and mingling around the open greenery all waiting for the royal family to join in the celebration.
Tyrion, tugged at his sister's dangling hand," Cersei, where would the bomb have been placed?"
Cersei surveyed the grounds and stuck her tongue out, "This is a bad area for a bomb. The open space negates the possibility of extra collateral damage. Sure, you'll get those within the initial blast but most bomb casualties actually occur from structural damage to a building and I know my bomb's range is perhaps ten metres."
"Meaning?" Tyrion cajoled, ignoring how clinical his sister sounded.
"It'll have to be close to the target," Cersei concluded.
"The royal family?" Jaime suggested.
"Makes sense," Tyrion rubbed his stubble.
Both their attention went to the centre of the garden and they said at the same time, "Stage."
The three siblings made their way as unsuspectingly as they could and ducked under the cloth-draped wooden stage when a particularly enthusiastic fire performer had everyone's attention.
"Let's find it before the royals make an appearance," Jaime took the lead searching with his lighter out in front of him while Cersei followed him in his crouched movements.
Tyrion navigated around the beams but the lack of light and his size was slowing him down.
"Wait," he hissed.
"What?"
"Sshhh," Tyrion snapped back at his brother.
In the ensuing silence, Jaime heard it. The ticking of the bomb.
Tick. Tick. TICK.
"Where is that?" Jaime quickly waved his lighter all around him.
"Be quiet and we might be able to find it," Tyrion threw back, frantically looking around his surroundings.
"There," Cersei said, calmly pointing to a space between Jaime and Tyrion, "I've seen that bag before."
Tyrion and Jaime both sprang towards the dark leather bag. Tyrion carefully unzipped it and indeed, inside was a bomb identical to the one Cersei had defused in the warehouse.
"Cersei," Jaime said gently, beckoning for his sister to join him, "Mind handling this for us."
"Will father let me come home if I do?"
The longing in her tone stabbed at Jaime's heart and he hesitated. Tyrion didn't.
"If you defuse this Cersei, father will let you come home, blow up all his carriages and teach you how to play the piano."
Cersei beamed at that and raced over to the ticking bag. Jaime scowled at Tyrion's obvious lie but Tyrion only shrugged back – do you want to live?
Cersei took out a hairpin and bent over the bomb.
Tyrion heard a loud wave of clapping which could only mean that the King had finally graced his own party with his presence, "How long–"
"I need to concentrate," Cersei cut Tyrion off.
She prodded the pin at the point where the wires connected to the metal and then without warning simply yanked out the coiled copper wire. She turned to her brothers triumphantly.
"Done, can we go home now? Can we go see father?"
"Um … Cersei it's still ticking?" Jaime said, not taking his eyes off the clock in the centre of the bomb. It only had a few seconds left on it and the wooden steps of the stage creaked as the King of Westeros started to welcome his guests above.
"I've jammed the pin. It doesn't matter if the timer runs out."
"Can you dismantle it fully?" Tyrion asked, mirroring his brother's discomfort with their sister's explanation as dull Northern tones captivated the attention above them.
"Fine," Cersei moaned.
By the time the hand of the clock had reached its intended destination the bomb was in pieces in Cersei's lap.
"Well done," Jaime praised.
Yes, good work Cersei," Tyrion added.
Cersei just blushed sweetly.
The lovely sibling moment didn't last long as the cloth surrounding the stage was ripped backwards and dozens of Scotland Yard's finest were staring at them with lanterns and batons in hand.
"Looks like everything is going according to your plan," Kenna whispered, as Petyr Baelish guided her on his arm through the gathering crowd.
She got glimpses of the Lannister siblings resisting their arrest through the gaping crowds. Jaime was putting up a particularly good exhibition of a boxing match before four officers piled on top of him. Tyrion managed to roll between a few legs before an officer grabbed his collar and picked him up while Cersei looked totally unfussed as officers surrounded her.
"Did you expect another outcome?" Baelish teased, as they broke free of the elite mob and made their way towards the now unguarded gates of Buckingham Palace.
"No," Kenna forced out in a calm tone, knowing her employer was testing her and the sly playfulness hid a steely mind. She couldn't resist the glance towards her sister. Alyssa was behind a protective circle of guards with the rest of the royal family.
"I told you that your sister wouldn't be in any danger whatsoever," Baelish hummed, patting Kenna's arm reassuringly. "You should trust me at my word, dear. I take care of my investments."
"I do," Kenna quickly fired out. "But counting on Tyrion to find the bomb and defuse it in time was a gamble."
Once again Kenna felt Baelish's intimidating focus fall on her, "I don't gamble Kenna. You should know that."
"You know what I mean."
"I do," he replied his neutral tone hiding a thousand thoughts, "allow me to hail you a carriage and get you home. Tomorrow will be a busy day and the first of a new era."
"The Lannisters won't just sit back and take this. They'll fight. This war isn't over."
"It will be soon. Lord Lannister and his brood will be hung for conspiring to blow up the royal family for whatever grievance the police can come up with once they find the evidence you planted in his home."
"And you'll sweep in to fill the vacuum left in his absence and take over his entire underground operation and perhaps even buy out his legitimate businesses," Kenna finished for him.
Baelish smiled. It sounded so simple yet had taken years of planning to accomplish but he wasn't done. He had plans to run the country, not just London.
"Relax Kenna, your part in this is now over. With Tyrion off my tail permanently I can focus all my energies on eliminating the Spider."
"That is if he exists," Kenna said, quietly.
Baelish's eyes twitched ever so slightly, "He exists."
Kenna just nodded at his words not willing to test his patience any further or give her anxiety any more opportunities to reveal itself. She was playing a dangerous game right now and her only shield was her employer's belief that he held her total loyalty.
Baelish opened the carriage door for her and pecked her on the cheek, "Enjoy what is left of your evening."
The door closed, and the horses trotted off.
Baelish took out his silver pocket watch and squinted at it in the street lantern's light, his night wasn't over. He had Whig party members to bribe and blackmail before the sun came up.
"Sir."
The voice came from behind him but it hadn't been unexpected.
"Ramsey," Baelish greeted, pulling out a cigar.
The ex-military man quickly produced a lighter and Baelish bent down to its flickering flame.
"What are my orders?" Ramsey asked, his pale blue eyes darting back and forth from the street to the commotion dying down behind them.
A few puffs of smoke rose into the night's chilly air before Baelish answered, "Now you tie up loose ends."
A trail of police officers pasted the two, wrestling the three Lannisters into the back of a police wagon as protests of innocence were ignored.
Once the wagon and police officers had dispersed Baelish threw his cigar down and stamped it out, "The Lannister's don't make it to trial. They don't see another sunset. Do you understand?"
"Yes, sir," Ramsey responded with an unnerving smile on his lips.
An hour later …
Westminster Constabulary, Scotland Yard's London Headquarters
"Chief inspector Slynt, what is the meaning of this?" Tyrion shouted as he floated a metre off the floor with a police officer holding him on either side.
The corrupt chief just grinned, "I always knew you were a troublemaker Lannister, just didn't peg you for an anarchist."
"We didn't plant the bomb. We defused the bomb. We saved the royal family!" Tyrion shouted at the top of his lungs as he saw Jaime and Cersei being dragged down another hallway.
"Save it for your lawyers, dwarf," Slynt dismissed, gesturing for his men to take Tyrion away.
"This is the Mockingbird's doing!" Tyrion continued to yell, shaking his chained wrists wildly as his man-handlers turned a corner and threw him face-first into a cell.
The clag of the barred door closing rang in his ears. He lifted his head from the cold stone floor and saw his father's unimpressed face staring down at him.
"What in the Seven Hells are you doing here?"
"Clearly I got arrested," Tywin deadpanned from his sitting position on the wooden bench, showing off his own set of handcuffs.
"For what?" Tyrion pushed himself back onto two feet, rubbing his hands to dispel the dirt on them.
"For being the mastermind behind the plot to assassinate the King apparently."
"Nonsense, what evidence do they have of that?"
"An anonymous tip sent Slynt my way and when they searched my home, they found schematics of the bomb in my home as well as a ledger accounting for my purchasing of materials for said bombs construction."
"Ludacris, how stupid do they think you are that you'd just leave that evidence lying around!" Tyrion gestured angrily with his hands, "Why did you let them in Casterly Rock anyway?!"
"I was rather indisposed when they broke my door down."
Tyrion raised an eyebrow.
"Lady Kenna visited me and drugged me so I wasn't in a fit state to ward off the police. She also planted the ledger and schematics."
"She works for the Mockingbird …" Tyrion realised, dejectedly.
"Petyr Baelish."
Tyrion's head snapped up, "He's a professor at Cambridge University."
"He's the Mockingbird."
"Oh, this is bad," Tyrion furiously rubbed at the sides of his head.
It was Tywin's turn to be puzzled, "Mmmm?"
"If we know who he is he isn't intending for us to live very long. We have to get out of here! Don't you have some of these officers on your payroll?"
"If they were still on my payroll, do you really think I'd be sitting here in this damp cell with my hands cuffed together!" Tywin exploded.
"I was just enquiring," Tyrion replied curtly, "but we can't wait for our lawyers to turn up. They'll be no use to corpses."
At that moment Jaime and Cersei were dragged through the metal door and deposited in the next cell to Tywin and Tyrion's.
Father and son both brushed up against the bars.
"What did they want?" Tyrion questioned immediately.
Jaime turned around slowly and rose to his feet with a supporting hand helping Cersei do the same, "Oh no, we're fine. Thanks for asking."
"Father?" Cersei spluttered before rushing towards Tywin and hugging him awkwardly through the bars between them.
Tywin patted her back gently but didn't say a word as Jaime exchanged a questioning glance at Tyrion.
"The police think Father sent us to assassinate the King with the bomb. Professor Petyr Baelish is the Mockingbird and Kenna betrayed us to him," Tyrion filled in quickly.
"He got to Kenna?" Jaime said, flabbergasted.
"She works for him," Tywin corrected, still trapped in Cersei's embrace.
"But she's my friend … I saved her life," Jaime muttered in disbelief.
"Maybe that was part of the play or a happenstance. Who knows at this point," Tyrion sat down crossed-legged and tapped his thighs, "Doesn't matter now. We need to break out of jail tonight as I don't think we last till the morning."
"How do you propose we do that?" Tywin asked, gently nudging Cersei away from him.
"I've already sorted our escape I'm now trying to figure out where we need to go and what we need to do afterwards," Tyrion declared, still drumming his fingers lightly.
"Are you going to share or wait for the Mockingbirds assassins to kill us first?" Jaime prodded, wrapping a comforting arm around Cersei's shoulders who was still staring at their father with child-like adoration.
Tyrion uncrossed his legs and went to the bars, "Cersei could I please borrow one of your hairpins? I promise I'll give it back."
Cersei looked from Jaime to Tywin. Both gave small nods of encouragement. She bounced to Tyrion and dramatically placed one of her hairpins in his outstretched hand.
"Thank you," Tyrion grinned back before using the thin metal strip to unlock the handcuffs around his and Tywin's wrists before doing the same to Jaime and Cersei through the bars.
He then waddled over to his cell door and picked the lock with relative ease that had Jaime smirking and Tywin tutting.
Once both doors were open Tywin's eyes settled on the closed metal door leading to the corridor that would be filled with police officers, "Tell me you thought further than our cell door?"
Tyrion with a twinkle in his eyes simply pointed to the drain at the other end of the cell block.
Tywin's face darkened.
Authors Note:
I thought it was appropriate that Tyrion would escape through the sewars :P Thank God for hairpins xD
Lannisters on the run, Ramsey in murder mission mode, Littlefinger is out to rule the Kingdom and the Spider lurking in the shadows
More chapters to come on this story.
Reviews:
Supremus85 - I changed the ending of the last chapter slightly and introduced another character too :)
Ksyushangel - I'm going for adorable but absolutely deadly :P I think you'll like my rewrite as I realise I went too 'hard' but the library scene is still wicked xD