Chapter 47: The Trade (Extermination, Part 6)
5 Hours Before The Extermination Ends
All the patrons had gone back to their rooms. The strange earthquake had ceased, but there were complications.
Adam had shot Jinx. Ximena actively had her hands in the imp's chest, using her fingers as a magnet to keep the injury from reaching his heart. Yuri could barely calm down an anxious Queenie. Prim and Adrian were pacing anxiously. Nifty brought water for everyone.
"What happened out there?" Vaggie asked. "That earthquake…"
"What are we going to do?" Adrian panicked. "We're losing Sacrificers! What are we going to tell the Archangels?"
"Forget the Archangels!" Prim flicked Adrian's forearms. "What am I supposed to tell the others in Heaven? All the Sacrificers still have families on Earth! Which relatives are gonna watch over them? Worse, which humans will sacrifice themselves?"
"Well, there's a war in Europe…" Yuri said.
"NOT helping!" The Exterminators both yelled.
Jinx coughed.
"Babe?" Queenie reached for him.
Ximena groaned. To keep her hands in the imp, she had removed her chainmail's sleeves. The other's gasped when they saw the darkness spreading from her wrist to her elbow.
"Ximena, did you touch lamb's blood?" Primrose asked.
Charlie had a look. "Satan… Did you get it from knocking on our door?"
Ximena looked down awkwardly.
"I gave her the milk and honey concoction she needed!" Husk defended.
"Very selfless of you, but as she holds onto this demon's heart to delay his death, it'll weaken her!" Prim said.
"She can let go…" Jinx whimpered.
"No!" Queenie held Jinx's hand. "I can't let you go like this…"
"Problem solved!" Katherine showed off a silver-colored manual.
"Seriously? The Bible? NOW?" Charlie exclaimed.
"No." Katherine opened the manual. "The official rulebook for holy and blasphemous treaties. For the past hour, I've been reading it to see if there could be a loophole."
"Your weapons kill us, there's no cure!" Vaggie waved her arms. "Jinx will be erased the moment you guys have to go back."
"Technically, yes. BUT!" Katherine pointed to an open page. "Chapter 3, Solomon's Statements. 16th paragraph of his wisdom, and his 28th approved by the Archangels back in 931 BC. 'Wicked born but bearing true compassion, sinful soul can be spared extermination.'"
Queenie smiled. "Jinx's the nicest imp ever!"
"AWWW…" Jinx smiled weakly.
"I'm not done! It also says: 'But for weak blasphemy to equal holy, blesser and blessed trade parties. The blesser expelled, and the blessed welcome.'"
The Exterminators, excluding Ximena, took turns looking at the pages. Even Charlie looked at it.
"I… I can't ask you guys to do that!" Charlie quivered.
"Miss Charlie?" Nifty asked.
"If Jinx can survive, he could actually become an angel… if one of them chooses to trade their angel-nature with his demon-nature…"
"We're not doing that!" Husk snapped. "No fucking way!"
"Nope!" Nifty agreed.
"But it could save Jinx!" Katherine insisted.
"Are you hearing yourself?" Vaggie shut the book. "Look, I usually see you as monsters and all, but you can't just give up being an angel to save one demon soul! It's an unfair trade!"
"And it kills the purpose of this place!" The princess showed her hotel to them. "This place is about giving a second chance, but also to work on the chance! How can demons prove they can be redeemed if they are just GIVEN the easy way out?"
"I'll do it."
Nobody could believe the words coming out of Ximena.
"You are NOT doing that!" Husk warned her.
"Xi, I'm the one Jinx and Queenie were protecting, so I feel responsible," Katherine got up. "If anyone should do it…"
"But I'm the reason this happened!" Ximena cried, her wings dropping. "I caused all of us to be exposed by initiating the truce! I didn't do my job, and now all our siblings-in-arms are paying the price! If I'd just stayed put, known my place… I wouldn't have wasted so many lives!"
"It wasn't your fault!" Prim said.
"I'm doing this, end of story!" Ximena snapped.
They looked at her grimly.
Falling was one thing. But for an angel willing to trade place with a demon? That was perhaps the most heartbreaking act of selflessness.
"Since the wicked born had to bear true compassion, it's only fair that everyone gets their dues…" Adrian put his hands together. "Ximena can trade with the imp… and Katherine may trade with the succubus…"
Queenie's eyes widened. "What? But…"
"Katherine said you and your partner protected her, and your relationship doesn't appear to be lustful." Adrian groaned in his own kindness. "It would be cruel to separate you."
Queenie hugged a pained Jinx.
"Aw, you're a softie!" Yuri teased Adrian.
"Shaddup."
Charlie sighed. "So… how does it work?"
Adrian flicked a Swiss army knife open, revealing the holy blade. "The classic way is a blood oath. Demon and angel cut palms and shake hands. Blood mix. Wouldn't recommend using your injured hand, Ximena."
Vaggie helped Ximena pull her left arm out of Jinx, who yelped from the pain. Husk wiped the blood off her.
"There is one thing, though." Adrian pointed out. "Demons lose their unholiness first, and angels lose their holiness next. The moment Jinx and Queenie become one of us, we must leave for Heaven with them at once."
"That fast? Why?" Charlie asked.
"Once our comrades become demons, we will no longer see them as our own but as prey," Adrian explained. "Even if in our hearts, they are our siblings-in-arms, friends, and surrogate family, our duty will force us to attack them as sinners. We must leave before Ximena and Katherine transform so that we don't kill them."
"So…" Yuri bit her lip. "We'll never see them again?"
Katherine gave Yuri a hug, wrapping her wings around her. "Don't be like that, OK? We'll still chat. If you pray enough, you could convince the superiors to give you days to visit Heavens' Embassy. And, you know, Ximena and I will obviously be hanging around in the hotel…"
"You guys are staying?" Charlie's eyes beamed. "I mean, it'll be difficult for you, but…"
"Your happiness nearly blinded me, I think we'll be fine!" Ximena snapped.
"Oh, it's never easy!" Katherine said. "I'm probably going to run into bitches I already knew, but you know, I was a nurse, so I'm not entirely useless. Ximena was a soldier, so she can help your girlfriend with security. And with us being, well, soon-to-be-ex-angels, we can help you on your…"
"THANK YOU!" Charlie squeezed Katherine in a hug.
"Get off!" Katherine ruffled her feathers. "God, it's like being hugged by cotton candy! Cotton candy SHOULD NOT hug you!"
"Yeah, yeah, you women do your emotional good-byes, and I'm doing some quick common law loopholes!" Adrian grumpily pulled out two rings. "Unless I wed these soon-to-be-ex-demons before they ascend, I won't hear the last of it!"
"Aw, you are a softy!" Primrose teased Adrian.
"SHADDUP!"
A few minutes of tearful hugs of farewell later, because I'm too lazy to write sentimental shit before I have to go to work…
"It's gonna be OK…" Queenie reassured Jinx.
"Bummer the boss' missing out…" Jinx agreed.
Adrian sliced Ximena and Katherine's palms with his knife, exposing their golden blood. Husk gave the imp and succubus a deep cut with one claw, exposing the black blood. Everyone else kept a safe distance. The cutters ran as fast as possible.
Angel blood and demonic blood shook hands.
"Wicked born but bearing true compassion, sinful soul can be spared extermination." The angels eyes glowed white. The demons eyes were pitch black. "But for weak blasphemy to equal holy, blesser and blessed trade parties. The blesser expelled, and the blessed welcome."
Holy and unholy blood swirled over them, forming a bloody yin-yang. Flipping positions, the golden blood splashed onto the demons and the black blood onto the angels. Ximena and Katherine became unconscious.
Jinx's wound disappeared. His deep red skin became pastel pink. Jinx's white hair and his tail gained feathery tips. His white spots creating hexagons all over his arms became perfect baby blue triangles. Bee antennas replaced his horns. Small wings grew on his back.
Queenie also gained pastel pink skin. Her mint hair remained, but golden flowers grew to tie it up into a bun. Unlike Jinx, her horns and tail disappeared. Her succubus wings were now two pairs of beautiful, prism wings.
Opening their eyes, Jinx and Queenie showed their new blue eyes. Silver halos floated over their heads.
"Oh my…" Queenie felt.
"Oh, wow…" Vaggie couldn't believe it.
"Queenie…" Jinx smiled. "You're still the same…" He dropped the moment he tried to flutter. "Shit, I forgot I can fly now! Hey, I can still curse! Being an angel rocks!"
"Guys…" Charlie smiled. "I…"
Something viciously roared.
The dark blood was slowly covering Ximena and Katherine.
Prim grabbed Queenie's hand. "Rejoice when you're in Heaven! We must go!"
"Wait!" Charlie reached out.
Jinx grabbed Queenie's spare hand.
The doors burst open. A new group of angel had arrived.
"NO TIME, MARTIN AND PSYCHE! WE GOT TO GO!" Despite the newcomers' protests, Yuri dragged them with her. Adrian led the angels as they took flight outside.
"Jinx! Queenie!" Charlie ran after them, tears in her eyes. "Wait!"
"Good-bye, Charlie…" Jinx waved, his voice breaking. "I know we weren't patrons… But thank you…"
"Take care of the boss, OK?" Queenie shouted back.
The Exterminators flew away with their new members. Soon, they were all distant stars flying straight into the distant haloed planet that was Heaven.
Charlie dropped on her knees.
So, it was possible…
If two Hellborns could become angels, then there was hope for the sinners…
The screams from inside brought her back. Husk and Vaggie didn't know what to do with the agonized ex-angels. With the demon blood taking them over, they were savagely ripping their way out of their armors. Charlie covered her mouth at the sounds of bones cracking. Katherine's angel wings disintegrated, but Ximena cried when her wings stretched and darkened.
"H… H…" Katherine choked.
"Ayúdame! Ayúdame!" Ximena shrieked.
"Charlie, what do we do?" Vaggie panicked.
"I don't know!" Charlie said. "My dad never told me about how he handled it!"
Ximena dragged her body on the floor. Her figure drastically thinned as fur spread over it. Clutching onto the ground more, her fingers became claws that scratched the floor. Fangs growing in her mouth made her scream.
"Xi!" Husk lifted her up.
"It hurts!" Tears poured out of her now fiery eyes.
"You fell from Heaven, what did you expect?"
"Husk!" Charlie gasped.
Ximena's nose shrank.
"What? You know the joke. "Did it hurt when you fell down from Heaven? For you are surely an angel?"
"Oh."
Ximena groaned. Her ears stretched out. Marigold outline patterns appeared all over her wings, arms, and legs, flickering in several different colors.
"You're turning into an alebrije demon." Husk calmly told Ximena. "People will mistake you for a walking drug trip."
"I never did drugs!" Ximena finally hissed.
A striped tail revealed itself. The halo cracked.
Husk put Ximena down on her new paws. After a few steps, she tumbled. Husk caught her.
"Why am I a cat alebrije?" Ximena felt her ear. "I wasn't much of a cat person in my life! Or afterlife!"
"Beats me. I still don't know why I'm a cat demon."
Why was his tail wagging?
"Hello!" Katherine stumbled up, ruffling her bluebird feathers. She started scratching under her neck. "Yuck! Why am I a bird? I wasn't a bird-themed angel! And why am I craving berries?"
Ximena mindlessly licked her own hand. Freaked out, she accidentally backed into the bar. "WHY am I licking myself like an animal?"
Charlie inhaled nervously.
"This… is gonna weird, isn't it?" Vaggie guessed.
3 Hours and 40 Minutes Before The Extermination Ends
Cain let the door open for Adam.
True to his own suggestion, the First Redeemed Sinner didn't try anything to fight back. Even though he could break free from the holy handcuffs, Adam chose to stay. Midnight and then he'd be back in Heaven. Who knew if he'd ever see his son again?
Adam dropped on the couch.
"I take you'd prefer milk and honey, or you have enough humility to try coffee?" Cain sassed.
"Whichever you prefer…" Adam said.
"Ugh! A jackass, yet you STILL have that annoying vagueness!" Cain groaned, tossing a log into the fireplace's purple flames. He stayed quiet. "Are… Mother and Abel…"
"Ascended to His Light. One with existence's abstract forces of good… It was already after your Mother and I atoned for the First Sin… and before the Great Flood…"
Cain said nothing.
He'd never have the chance to apologize to his brother. Or speak to his mother. He could easily tell Adam that he had it coming, but Cain knew Adam loved his mother and brother best. So to think that he spent eternity without them?
Running steps alerted him of Trixie's presence. The imp ran down the stairs, a tray piled up with dirty mugs. Cain caught the tray before she could trip on the last step.
"Trixie, why are you up?" He asked. "I thought you'd be sleeping in before work."
"I was!" Trixie quickly answered. "But there was that earthquake, and the computers beeped like crazy, so August went to check on them! The sin polls are dropping drastically, and I don't just mean because of the poachers!" Trixie nonchalantly pointed at Adam during her rambling. "An earthquake just ended, and it affected the rings! All the sins have been calling Lucifer, it's a mess everywhere, and a LOT of demons, sinners and Hellborns, got killed! Trust me, it's bad enough that everyone is dying TODAY, but it's worse that the Devil literally just called August to go over the data and come up with backup suggestions!"
"OK, calm down." Cain encouraged the imp to take a break. "Did you drink all that coffee?"
"August drank three-quarters! I don't know how you guys do it! He still hasn't passed out after that 13th cup!"
"I'll take over." Cain pointed at Adam. "Keep an eye on him while I get some decaf for August, OK?"
"Yes, sir!" Trixie kicked a step, revealing a safe. She pulled out a water gun. Lamb's blood could be seen through the purple plastic toy.
"Have you been hiding this toy the whole time?" Cain frowned.
"Please, I've been hiding lamb's blood in the property since I was nine! I'm prepared!"
"TRIXIE! TURN THE TV OFF!" August shouted from upstairs.
"IT'S NOT ON!" Trixie shouted.
"IT'S GETTING SMALLER! I THINK ANTS ARE CRAWLING!"
"Yeah, no, he's going to pull an all-nighter." Cain shoved the tray onto Adam's hands. Without bothering to hear his father's protests. "Try not to poison my father, Trixie, OK?"
Trixie shrugged.
Adam wanted to follow Cain. Yet at the same time…
He's got a fucking better father instinct than me…
Adam followed the imp to avoid her plastic toy of death. At least the creature had the decency of pulling a stool for him to sit on and take his tray. Just not the handcuffs.
Trixie dropped the dishes into the sink.
"You're seriously not gonna wash that?" He asked.
"I will after you leave." Trixie's tail pulled the fridge open. "Ya want water? Wine? Or we got virgin piña coladas! Lord Cain made some last night!"
Adam sighed. "A piña colada would be nice…"
Trixie tilted her head. "You forgot four words before that sentence."
Adam groaned. "MAY I PLEASE have a piña colada?"
Trixie smugly grabbed a glass of piña colada and gave it to the First Redeemed Sinner. Filling a glass of water for herself, the imp dropped a pinch of amphetamine in her cup.
"You know are drugs are bad for you, right?"
The imp shrugged and just drank.
The toy gun was just resting next to her. On the counter.
"You realize I'm Adam, right? First Redeemed Sinner. Leader of the Sacrificers. Literally the motherfucking father and grandfather of your masters."
Trixie kept drinking.
"I could easily kill you. Unlike the sinners, you Hellborns are physically weak."
When her cup got empty, Trixie just poured more water. No pinches of drugs this time.
"OK, I don't know if this is a drug thing or a demon thing, but you're a little bit too bold."
"Eh." Trixie shrugged. "I don't hate to burst your bubble, Mr. Adam, but I've already met August's grandpa. I'm conditioned to view his family as rat faced bitches."
Adam's grip on his glass tightened.
He'd forgotten that along with marrying Invidia, Cain…
He gulped.
Son, please don't listen to him!
He sniffed.
"If it makes ya feel worse, the Great Underdweller barely acknowledges August… Then again, he never seemed to like Invidia… And he eats the grandkids that are useless to him. 'What isn't envied or envious is worthless.' Von Ouroboros family motto."
"He's the offspring of my son. He can't be worthless!"
"SOOOO… You're saying August's worth depends on who he's bred to?"
"NO! You're twisting my words!"
Trixie shrugged.
Adam drank his piña colada. His golden eyes squinted and he quickly used his sleeve to wipe the tears. "Tastes just as sweetly as all the desserts Cain used to make with his harvests. His mother loved every juice he extracted from fruits." He sniffed. "I didn't even know I have a grandson. Being a fucking wimp, I couldn't open those cards… He pushed me away for so long, I didn't know how to react when he suddenly started sending letters… Any day I get one, I always think it might be his last one."
"Yes, because getting 5,840 letters from your son for the past 16 years is a big flag that he's totally dead."
Adam looked down at his drink miserably.
"Fucking worst dad ever…"
"Nah! You're probably Number 2 after the Great Underdweller…" Trixie shrugged. "If it makes ya feel better about your own parenting shit…"
"Nothing will make me feel better about my parenting shit. I couldn't even stop my own son from Leviathan's influence, then said son murdered my other son, murdered son gets abstracted, and my remaining son hates my ass because I have to kill his…" He hesitated.
"Indigo."
"Who?"
"Ines Coeurdor. August's unknown, long-lost twin." Trixie did jazz-hands.
Adam dropped his glass. Trixie caught it.
"Yeah, I figured it out on my own. Cain confirmed it to me." Trixie brought the glasses to the sink. "You're probably the last person he wants to be compared and contrasted too, but he sure as fuck borrowed a page from your parental habits."
"What do you mean?"
Trixie sighed. "Lord Cain still hasn't given the big reveal to August. In the meantime, August's getting chummy with her, unaware that she's his twin. I don't know if it's one of those 'twin connection' thingies, but they became friends fast."
"But… The Celestial Eclipse…" Adam looked at the kitchen door.
"Yeah, the 'Apocalypse of Envy'. Lord Cain thinks it can be avoided if In… Ines doesn't reach her full powers' limit." She tapped her fingers against the counter. "Thinks that if she's not 'filled up' yet, whatever that means, or that she's kept as far away from the others as possible, then TECHNICALLY, the whole thing gets blown off. THEN he tells them they're related!" She snorted. "August's my friend. I'm not breaking the news to him first."
The kitchen door opened. Cain sighed in relief.
"Hate that I did this, but I gave him sleeping pills…"
"Cain, is your son oblivious to the situation?" Adam got up from his seat and flew to Cain.
Cain shot a glare at Trixie.
"Does he even know about the Celestial Eclipse?"
The First Murderer walked past the First Redeemed Sinner.
Adam flew before Cain.
"Cain… Don't do what I did."
Cain's scorpion tail agitated.
"I may not fully comprehend your affection for the ver… Ines, but don't do what I did back then. If you REALLY want her to survive, you really must make sure that Leviathan doesn't get to her."
"He's locked in the Envy Ring. She's in the Pride Ring. She STAYS in this ring. She doesn't consume demons' envious hearts."
"You know what I mean, Cain! Remember how Leviathan got to you!"
1 Hour and 33 Minutes Before The Extermination Ends
Alastor had found a spare enchanted doorknob at Rosie's. He and Angel took Indigo back to the Radio Tower.
Her first Extermination had traumatized her… Indigo stayed in her room for may minutes. Her shadow was seen curled by the door, sobbing.
Sitting on the sofa, Angel Dust hated himself.
This could have all been avoided… It was his fault…
Fat Nuggets rubbed his head against the spider's legs.
Alastor stood before him.
"Angel…" Alastor took a breath. "I… I apologize for not pulling you in the loop yet. I planned on discussing, but after today. Today was horrible."
"We'll talk about it later." Angel Dust sniffed. "It's my fault she went through all this… She didn't deserve this. I can get over myself for not noticing her weapon… I can't get over how… You know." Angel broke. "I should have just put up with it! Bail on the client, deal with Val when I gotta go back…"
Alastor took Angel's lower hands. The spider looked tearfully at him.
"And now we know that not everything should fall on one of us." Alastor gently wiped the spider's tear away. "And now we know that certain things can't be kept within."
Angel's upper right hand took the one that had just wiped his tear away. He both chuckled and smiled. "Ya know… Val would have never done what you did for me… Out there…"
"Obviously, your death wasn't an option." Alastor gave a gentle kiss to the spider's hand. A great blush appeared on the latter's cheeks. "I honestly don't know how to keep myself away from you. I despise your career. Your pain. Your racist father."
Angel laughed. "And I fucking hate your self-harm. And I hate the way Vox talks about you or tries to have you."
Alastor scoffed. "PLEASE! He can dream!"
"Yeah, he sucks." Angel stroke Alastor's black-dipped red hair. "You're a sadist, but you care. You're insane, yet you have great ideas. You're a cannibal, yet you cook better than ten chefs combined. You've hidden a lot of things from me, yet… You still risked everything. For me…"
"We could try!" Alastor blurted. Embarrassed, he let go of Angel Dust. "I mean, trusting each other! With feelings! I think! I sound like a fool!"
Angel stunned him with a sweet peck on the cheek.
"My fool."
Alastor's smile brightened into a genuine one.
Angel couldn't help himself and pounced onto Alastor. Both demons fell into a cuddle on the couch before accidentally rolling onto the floor. Laughing by the fireplace. Pressing foreheads against each other…
The bedroom door opened.
Alastor sat up and Angel Dust rolled on his belly. Indigo's cheeks suffered from tear stains, her hands dragging a pillow and her plushie close to her.
"I don't want to be alone…" She whimpered.
Angel and Alastor looked at one another. They exchanged a nod.
"Why don't we do a sleepover?" Angel gestured Indigo over.
"OK…"
Alastor summoned pillows. Indigo curled between the two of them. Angel tucked them all in.
Despite the destruction out there and the angels fleeing earlier back to Heaven, this was the safest moment this unlikely trio had experienced all day.
30 Minutes Before The Extermination Ends
Down in the Envy Ring, the unsuspecting cambion's cruel aunts and uncle looked over the newest polls.
PRIDE: 50%
NON-CLASSIFIED: 1%
LUST: 1.5%
WRATH: 0.5%
GREED: -33%
GLUTTONY: 1.5%
SLOTH: -55%
ENVY: -66%
Next to the data were videos of the carnage that had spread throughout Hell. All because an envy-focused brat had stomped her little foot.
"Does anyone feel like we SLIGHTLY underestimated the filth?" Phthonus asked.
"Slightly? She did in ONE day what the Exterminators do in 6 years!" Oizys laughed. "Father will be so ecstatic! The earthquake will hide our involvement with the lamb's blood, and with such unrealistic polls, Lucifer will think that Father's weakening! And he'll have all the other sin polls to worry about, they'll be too distracted by their ultimate fate! Oh, and let's not forget the flowers!"
"Oh, yeah. Father never picked out a name for them. And?"
"So?" Oizys flicked her brother on the horns/antennas/whatever. "Envy overkills organic beings. Flower grows. Flower roots drink up envy. Groundwater flow system causes envy to sink further down the rings…"
Under his mask, Phthonus smiled. "And with each ring suffering from destruction, the downpour creates a bigger one…"
"And AAAAALL that PURE envy comes RIGHT HERE!" Oizys pointed at the air. "Liquid envy filling our oceans in quantity…" She gasped. "Oh my Satan! We got our sin polls so drastically drained; they won't be able to tell that the PUREST envy goes straight to the corals!" Oizys clapped her hands ecstatically.
Nemesis checked off 'Phase 1' in their family's chart of goals. "Well! Dramatic as it was, we covered Phase 1! My husband and I will take care of Phase 2."
"Why you two? Lucille and I can do it!" Phthonus pointed out.
"And what? Hand out poisoned apples?" Nemesis' snark earned a loud laugh from her sister. "Besides, I fucking hate spending Extermination Day cooped up with you guys. Along with doing what's necessary, I can use a vacay on Earth… Throwing some more retribution here and there." Nemesis clasped her hands together. "Since it's OFFICIALLY the new year, what was it you said, Phthonus? Something about the filth and two Overlords and Angel Dust."
Her siblings stared at her.
"What? So I like watching porn films with beatings, big whoop! This is Hell!"
"Don't blame you. I like the number of jealous wives that spider attracts." Phthonus pulled out a hand mirror and smashed it on the table. The shards broke apart into a thousand pieces and swarmed together in silhouettes acting out scenes. The lights coming from the chandeliers gave them a purple-palette series of visuals.
Ines risking her hunger to save Angel Dust.
Ines being alone in the graveyard.
Alastor rescuing Angel Dust.
Ines creating the earthquake before passing out.
Alastor and Angel Dust finding Ines.
An envy-starved, crazy Ines killing Exterminators and nearly targeting Mimzy.
Alastor killing an Exterminator to protect the little monster.
The vermin being held close by the two demons, having a cute family sleepover in the Radio Tower.
"Aw, they make a cute family!" Oizys squealed. "I'm actually jealous!" She gasped. "The filth is making ME envious while she's unconscious!"
"Oizys, even I am envious of you when you're still alive." Nemesis rolled her eyes. Phthonus fixed his mirror with magic, turning off the visuals.
"Ines gave in to her cravings when placed in a situation that endangered either Alastor or Angel Dust," Phthonus explained.
"Sins can't be involved with Overlords' affairs," Nemesis said flatly.
"Never said WE had to be involved! Directly!" Phthonus got up and walked around the conference room. "Lucille is the Evil Queen when it comes to vanity-induced jealousy, but love-related jealousy? MY champagne and caviar! I know a particular group of Overlords with two members bearing envious hearts. Wouldn't it be interesting? When a slave gains freedom and becomes a power couple with his masters' competitors."
"OOOOOOOOOOOHHH!" Nemesis and Oizys said unison.
"We know Father is toying with Paimon. Alastor can get it done faster. Angel Dust can make it worse. PICTURE IT! Vox's jealousy will worsen when he finds out he's losing his dream trophy to a whore of his toxic partner! The delusional fans will lose their minds to Hell's next power couple! And Velvette? Seventeenth Brunch, anyone?"
"Can't believe I'm saying this without any envy, but that's actually a brilliant idea, brother!" Nemesis clapped. "I take care of business on Earth, while you two brainstorm to ensure that Ines marinates LIKE THAT! We'll discuss the bugs, machine, and sins when I'm back!"
"As for the current public 'disaster', I have a good idea." Oizys pulled out her Hellphone and hit speed dial on a specific number. "LIIIIIIZZZZZIIIIIE!" She sang out loud. "Great news, the plan's getting better, but my siblings and I need to pretend that things are terrible in Envy. Any chance you can, I don't know, do an emergency press conference at Envy-Carlo? Like, before lunch?"