Please note: This chapter is for those 18 years and older. If you are not at least 18, please skip and go to the next chapter. Also, if you do not wish to read a 'lemon', please move to the next chapter.
The word hung in the air between us.
Sex.
His black eyes bore into mine and I could not help the tremble of my bottom lip, nervous for his response.
Will he want me? Or am I like Edward said – breakable and only a time filler for vampires?
"Are you sure?"
I swallowed. What can I say that is the truth?
Am I sure that I am beyond nervous? YES!
Am I sure that I haven't gotten a clue what I am doing? YES!
Am I sure that I will likely be the worse lay he has ever had? Most definitely!
Am I sure that I would regret it forever if I didn't follow through on this chance?
"Yes." My voice was softer than a whisper, but luckily, vampire hearing did not require it to be louder.
Jasper's gaze lowered to my mouth as he slowly leaned forward, his right hand coming up to cup my head. Afraid to ruin the moment, I didn't move, waiting for the kiss I had been dreaming of for a while. My eyes closed as I took a breath.
As our lips touched, heat and a burning sensation blasted forth from my mouth and throughout my body. I leaned into the kiss, wrapping my arms around Jasper's neck, pulling myself closer. His left arm wrapped around my waist and drew me into his lap. As much as vampires feel like granite, his lips surprisingly melded with mine and moved. It did not feel like kissing a robot, like it had with Edward. This, this was more . . . well, more.
His tongue traced my lips and after a few seconds, I cautiously ventured my tongue out as well, wanting to know what he tasted like. He tilted his head to the side more and leaned in closer, forcing his tongue between my lips as mine met his. The battle tantalizing and leaving me breathless.
My hands were moving on their own accord, exploring Jasper's hair, shoulders, back, chest, waist – anything they could reach without pulling out of his kiss. His hands were tracing my back and hips. When they gripped my ass, grinding me into his erection that had made itself known, I gasped out.
His mouth torn away from my lips, trailed down my neck with my head thrown back. He nibbled back up and made his way over to my ear, gently pulling it between his teeth and lips, careful of his strength.
"Oh, god!" I moaned out.
"Only for you, darlin'. Let's take this upstairs."
I shivered at the promise in his words. He helped steady me on my feet as I heaved, catching my breath. Taking my hand, he led me towards the stairs and up to my bedroom. Once there, I froze in the doorway. The reality of what was about to happen like a bucket of cold water in my face. Jasper turned towards me, his power trying to reach me, to feel me and I closed my eyes, biting my bottom lip.
How stupid could I be? He doesn't like me. He is just trying to fulfill my last wish as a human. I mean nothing. I am nothing!
Gentle hands smoothed my hair away from my face. I squeezed my eyes tighter, afraid to see pity, distaste, or even frustration on Jasper's face. I was falling so fast and jumped at this opportunity to request this, to act on my desires, but does he really have a desire this too?
I could feel his forehead pressed against mine. His breath lightly mingling with mine.
"I wish you wouldn't turn your emotions off from me. What I would not give to be in your head right now."
I gulped. My breathing sped up and I placed my palms on his chest. Uncertain if I were trying to stop him coming closer or just so I could feel him.
"Shhh, now. Isabella, talk to me."
A tear escaped and trialed down my cheek. His thumb wiped it away and then he pulled me into a hug. I welcomed the closeness while being able to hide my face. "I'm sorry."
He chuckled. "You apologize for the strangest things. There is no need to be sorry. You are nervous. I am about to essentially kill you. We can wait until tomorrow if you like. You do not have to change today."
I sighed and pushed back from him. "I'm not nervous about becoming a vampire. Sure, I am not looking forward to the burning pain you told me about. But I really think that turning is the right decision. For me."
He pulled us towards the bed, and we sat on the edge. "So, darlin'. Tell me then. Why are you so nervous you are avoiding looking at me? I would much rather see those beautiful brown eyes."
I scoffed. "You don't need to humour me. I know they are just muddy brown."
His hand cupped my chin and turned my face towards him. "I assure you, that no mud could be lucky enough to be the same colour as your eyes. Isabella, you have beautiful eyes. You are beautiful."
Beginning to shake my head and roll my eyes, he growled.
"Isabella. I have been alive for more than a century. I have seen thousands of women over those years. I have slept with some of them. Woman have thrown themselves at me. To use me for protection. To use me for revenge. To use me to kill time and scratch an 'itch' while they waited for their mate."
I lowered my gaze, drooping my shoulders and tucking in on myself. I knew it. I am nothing to him.
His hand again lifted my chin but this time his mouth covered mine in a soft gentle kiss before he rested his forehead on mine. "But none of those women were as beautiful and amazing as you. I am sorry you were not my first. But I am not sorry you asked for sex. If you will still let me, I want to make love to you."
"What?"
He smiled and closed his eyes. "Oh Isabella. I desire you. No – I crave you. I want to know how you feel as a human and then, after your change, as a vampire. Let me love you. Let me show you how precious you are. I promise that it will be better than when you were with Edward."
I bit my lip and heat burned my face, the blush coming faster than I could manage. "Edward and I . . . well, we never . . . you know. He wanted to wait for marriage and didn't want to damn my soul." I trailed off, wringing my hands together in my lap.
Jasper's hands began rubbing my thigh and my back, a low growl meeting my ears. "Then he was a god damn fool."
His mouth trailed kisses along my neck as his hands continued exploring me, relaxing me. I leaned into the ministrations of his mouth and moaned, my eyes closing at the sensations. After a few moments, he leaned into me until I lowered back onto the bed. His left hand interlocked fingers with my right hand and pulled it above my head as his right hand traced down my side until he gripped me under my butt, pulling me tight against him.
My legs wrapped around his waist as my only available hand laced through his hair, gripping with the sensations from the kiss. His mouth left mine, granting me access to air, as he trailed down my neck. Bringing his right hand back up, he tucked one finger into the collar of my shirt and pulled. At first the tugging sensation was distracting until he began nibbling on my shoulder, which was now bare to him.
Somehow, my shirt was in shreds, and he hooked his finger into my bra. A moment later, the bra was split in two and my breasts fell free. He lowered his mouth to one nipple and used his fingers to massage the other.
"Oh, god. Ohh."
I was biting my lip between gasps as new sensations overwhelmed me.
After a while, Jasper switched nipples and I was writhing and moaning, clawing at his hair and back with my one free hand. He steadily kept one of my hands above my head. Out of reach from touching him or myself. I felt like I was dripping wet and knew that I had never gotten myself this worked up before. This was so much more.
"Darlin', are you ready for me to take your pants off?"
All I could do was nod. His hand let go of mine and I brought it to his hair as well until he started moving down my body, laying kisses as he went. He got to my waist where he took my pants into his mouth and then pulled.
"Fuck me," I breathed out.
Jasper's eyes never left mine as he stripped me with his mouth, and it was the hottest thing I had ever seen.
"I plan to."
I licked my lips and leaned up, resting on my elbows. In a second, all of the shreds of my clothes were thrown away from the bed and I was left in just my underwear. He stood back and brought his shirt up over his head. I gasped as his chiseled chest met my eyes. I could see the evidence of even more scars that he had on his arms, but to me, it only added to his looks.
He was handsome and hot.
And he was stripping for me.
Next, he removed his pants, his bulge tenting his underwear.
"You ready?" He said, wagging his eyebrows.
All I could do was nod. He smirked as he used his nails to tear the sides of his underwear and then they fell away.
He was huge!
My eyes bulged. I had heard guys always bragged they were six inches and thick. But this – this was larger. Much larger.
How will he fit?
"Don't worry. I will make sure you are ready, and you will be begging for it. First, let me taste you."
With that, he knelt between my legs and gently removed my underwear. My blush reached my ears again, but he did not give me much time to fret before his mouth was on me. I had heard about this but had not been sure it was as good as the girls at school said.
I was wrong yet so were they. This was amazing and I lost ability to all thoughts as his mouth and tongue brought out new sensations I never thought possible.
A need was building within me. Stronger and stronger. Demanding something. Needing. My hands gripped Jasper's head, trying to direct him, to hold him close.
"So close. I need . . . I need . . . Jasper,"
He pulled away and I was left gasping and panting. Thrashing my head.
"No. Please. Don't stop." I begged and whimpered.
Jasper ignored my pleas but brought himself back up along my body, spreading my legs as he rested between them. He leaned down and gave me a kiss and I could taste myself on his lips. I would have thought I would have been disgusted with that, but it only made me squirm more underneath him.
His left arm lifted my right leg, his hand resting behind my knee as he brought it up. I felt the tip of his manhood at my entrance. I whimpered. Needing it.
"Please."
"For you – anything, my darlin'."
He pushed forward slowly. My body felt the stretch and I cried out as pain came. I felt Jasper trying to take the pain away, but I bit my lip and held on. Finally, his hips pressed against me as he was fully sheathed.
He waited until I started to move my hips as the pain slowly eased and that building desire returned, overriding all thoughts. We moved and thrust together, grunting, and calling out each other's names. Moaning and screaming out until finally I was reaching a limit. It built and built, almost painfully before I screamed out a final time, my whole-body convulsing.
Jasper sped up and jerked as he too groaned out. The sensation of him shooting within me added more to my sensations and I tightened up even more.
As he withdrew from me and I was left gasping, he kissed me before kissing down my neck. At the crook, he whispered into my skin, "I'm sorry." Then, his teeth punctured my skin, and I could feel him drawing out my blood, drinking my life force. I was still in after-sex bliss and did not even mind if I was going to die. I was dying happy.
That is, until the fire started, and he pulled away to bite on the other side of my neck, both wrists and both thighs until finally, right above the heart.
He was changing me.