PROLOGUE
It's cold. She scuffs her shoe on the tarmac.
Waits.
Her hair is in pigtails. A blue bobble hat on her head. Her cheeks rosy. Her blue eyes peering out at the parents.
She still sometimes hopes he'll be there like he use to.
She still forgets sometimes. Expects his face to appear among the other parents. It doesn't.
He was never late. Not once.
Her mother had never been as good at time keeping. Her ability to keep track of time is even more questionable now.
'Sawyer, Sawyer, Sawyer!' She hear's her little sister's chant before she sees her.
The just three year old's face appears through the sea of adult legs as she hurries to the outside of her sister's classroom. She propels herself at her as soon as she's within reach. 'Hey Harp' She laughs because her sibling's enthusiasm to see her never wanes. They're the best of friends despite the four years between them.
'I missed you soooo much!' The shorter child exclaims dramatically.
'It's not been that long Harper' She kisses the top of the wild mop of blonde hair that sits upon her sister's head, tries to tame it down with her hands but it pings back out when she retracts her fingers.
'I not like schools'
'School' Sawyer corrects.
'School' The younger little girl repeats.
'Harper how many times? Do not run off' Their mother scolds as she joins them but there's a small smile on her face because god does she love how close these two are. She knows it's not always the way, knows it might not stay this way, god she hopes it does though because it gives her a bit of peace of mind knowing that they'll always look out for each other.
'I had to hug my sister'
'I'm sure you could've held out five more seconds. Hey baby' She steals a hug from her eldest child then, working around the three year old that is yet to detach herself.
'Hi Mummy'
'Sorry I'm late'
'It's ok'
'No it's not. I'm sorry'
'It's fine Mum' She dismisses again. Mummy becomes Mum like it frequently has in recent months. Because despite her young age she's grown up a lot in the last year and a half. Has had to.
'Did you have a good day?'
'Uhuh'
'Good. That's good. You wanna go have a hot chocolate with Nana?'
'You'll stay too?'
'Uhuh' Her mother smiles that smile. That smile that the seven year old hates because it's not real. Not that she's old enough to really pin point that but she knows her mother is not the same. Hasn't been the same. Not since her father left. She hears her crying in the bathroom. When she comes out her make up is fixed and her smile in place but the child isn't fooled. She plays with them. At least goes through the motions of playing. Sometimes she'll zone out. Stare aimlessly and the little girl knows it's best to entertain her little sister in such moments because she prefers to be at home even if her Mother isn't feeling like herself. And if she asks what's wrong she knows they'll go spend the day at her Nana's or Aunt and Uncle's house. She'd rather be home to make sure her Mother doesn't leave. Still doesn't completely trust that her Mother will always come back despite her promises because he'd promised he'd come back too.