It opens on the Happy Hotel as Lincoln walks in. He didn't have to work here today, but he also had to ask Charlie something.
Husk: *cleaning off a glass, notices Lincoln enter* Hey, kid.
Lincoln: Hey, Husker. Where's Charlie at?
Husk: Upstairs.
Lincoln walks up the stairs, stopping at the top as Niffty blitzes right next to him and dusts off the railing.
Niffty: Hi, Lincoln! Bye, Lincoln! *speeds off*
Lincoln chuckles a bit and keeps walking. Mrs. Mayberry exits her room and notices Lincoln.
Mrs. Mayberry: Oh! It's you! Lincoln, right?
Lincoln: *nods* Yes, ma'am. You're Mrs. Mayberry, right?
Sophia: Yes, but please just call me Sophia. I'm not Mrs. Mayberry anymore.
Lincoln: Ah, right. Killed your ex-husband because he cheated. *Sophia nods* How's the hotel been treating you?
Sophia: Oh, wonderful. I've felt a lot less angry since coming here. I've… *blushes a bit* … even met someone.
Lincoln: *smirks* Oh?
Sophia: His name is Jackson, and he's divorced as well.
Lincoln: Charred black skin with bony spikes?
Sophia: … I should've known you had him as a client.
Lincoln: *smiles* Good for you, Sophia. Well, I gotta go find Charlie. *walks past her* See you around.
Sophia: *waves* Bye.
Lincoln soon finds Charlie in her office. She was looking over some of the info on the hotel's residents, including a recent one by the name of Crymini. Lincoln knocks on the door, catching her attention.
Charlie: Oh! *sets the papers down and stands up* Lincoln, hi! I wasn't expecting you today!
Lincoln: Hey, Charlie. I know today's not one of my days to work here, but I needed to talk to you about something. Something Lori and Leni are probably aware of.
Charlie: Sure, what is it?
Lincoln: Well… I'm the Virgo Zodiac Hellhound, and since you're so high up on Hell's hierarchy, I was wondering how much you know about the Zodiac Hellhounds.
Charlie looks surprised for a second, but then smiles.
Charlie: Follow me.
Charlie walks out of the office, with Lincoln following behind. She leads Lincoln down the stairs, then to a room in the hotel Lincoln has only seen a little bit of: the library, which had a lot of bookshelves that were stacked with books of all kinds.
Lincoln: *stunned* There's THIS many books in this library?!
Charlie: *slightly giggles as she leads Lincoln through the shelves* Sorry, I didn't show you the full library when I gave you the tour… With how big it is, that would have taken all day.
Lincoln: No, it's fine, Charlie. I'm just surprised by how many books are here.
Charlie stops in one aisle and climbs up a ladder along the shelf. She glances through the rows of books, till she spots the one she was looking for.
Charlie: *smiles* Well, this book here should have what you're looking for.
She uses her magic to telekinetically toss the book down to Lincoln, who catches it. He sees the title reads "The Zodiac Hellhounds".
Lincoln: *surprised* Oh wow. *looks up as Charlie slides down the ladder* Do you have a book for basically everything in Hell?
Charlie: *smiles* Hell, Heaven, the living world, you name it. Where do you think the Goetias got their Grimoire?
Lincoln: *smiles* Well, thanks, Charlie.
Lincoln walks out of the library and takes a seat on one of the couches in the lobby, then opens the book. Charlie sits down next to him as he begins reading, just as Vaggie and Angel Dust walk into the room.
Vaggie: *spots them* What's going on?
Charlie: *looks up* Oh, hey, Vaggie. Lincoln's reading up on the Zodiac Hellhounds.
Angel Dust: *Vaggie's one eye widens in surprise* The what now?
Vaggie: Why would he be reading on that?
Lincoln: *glances up briefly* I just found out I am one.
Angel Dust: The fuck even is a Zodiac Hellhound? Y'know what, whatever you're reading, scooch over.
He sits on Lincoln's other side as Vaggie sits next to Charlie.
Lincoln: *reading from the book* "The Zodiac Hellhounds are a group of 13 Hellhounds chosen at birth to represent a chosen Zodiac sign. While not spoken about publicly by most citizens in Hell, mainly due to them being incomplete until now, the Zodiac Hellhounds are among the highest ranks of Demons in Hell, even above the Goetias."
THAT definitely came as a shock to Lincoln. He was ranked above the Goetias?! No… he was ranked above Stella?! He had to shake this thought real quick and keep reading.
Lincoln: *reading* "Their potential is capable of matching the Sins themselves, with the exception of Lucifer himself. These Zodiacs are chosen at birth, and can be identified by their eyes. They have a mental link with each other, able to talk with each other even between Hell and the living world. Unlike the everyday Hellhound, who has red eyes, their eyes are a different color depending on their assigned Zodiac."
Angel Dust: And which one are you?
Lincoln: The Virgo.
He flips the page and ends up on the section titled "The Individual Zodiacs", which spanned across two pages. Below the title were images of each Zodiac Hellhound with their name and assigned Zodiac below it.
Charlie: *Lincoln glances at her* Here, instead of flipping the pages here, just tap the images and it'll bring you right to the section.
Charlie taps the picture with Lynn, and the pages glow brightly, before changing to the Aries Zodiac page.
Lincoln: *surprised* Oh wow, that's convenient. *reading* "Lynn Kratos is the Aries Zodiac, and is always looking to push her strength. At 18 years old, she works as a bodyguard for paying clients, such as Verosika Mayday. Lynn will always get into fights and hardly ever relies on Hellhound Bloodlust, wanting to use her every day strength that she is constantly improving. When not in fights or working, she will often go to the Gluttony Ring and party with Queen Beelzebub."
Angel Dust: I think I saw her before, wait a sec. *looks closer, then shakes his head* Nope, nevermind. Wrong gal.
Lincoln goes back to the section with the listed Zodiacs, then taps on the picture of Lisa. The pages glow and change to the Taurus Zodiac page.
Lincoln: *reading* "Lisa Ludwig is Taurus Zodiac, and the smartest Hellhound in all of Hell despite her young age of 9 years old."
Vaggie: *eye widens* She's only 9?! ¡¿Qué carajo?! (Translation: What the fuck?!)
Lincoln: *keeps reading* "She works with all types of experiments, especially robotics. She created a sentient machine known as the Terminating Observing and Destroying Device, also called T.O.D.D., that can fight as its own machine or be worn as a suit."
Angel Dust: Like those "Steel Demon" movies with Albert Drowney IV?
Lincoln: *shrugs* Pretty much.
He goes back to the listed Zodiacs section, then tapping Lana and Lola's picture as it brings him to the Gemini Zodiac page.
Lincoln: *reading* "Lana and Lola Edain are the twin Gemini Zodiac. As Gemini revolves around twins, it's no surprise that the Gemini Zodiac has two Hellhounds representing it. Right now, they have jobs on the Rough n' Tumbleweed Ranch in the Wrath Ring, but have been offered jobs at the Immediate Murder Professionals. These two are polar opposites and always fight and bicker, but when they need to, they work together perfectly. They always stick together and have each other's back, as seen when Lana bit the head off of a guy that was harassing Lola, or when Lola clawed the eyes out of a spoiled brat that was bullying Lana." *stunned a bit* … Yeah, those two will definitely make some good killers.
Charlie: Aren't they only 11?
Lincoln: Still vicious as hell. Lana gave me a bit of trouble at the Harvest Moon Festival.
Going back to the listed Zodiacs section, he then taps Lucy's picture as it brings him to the Cancer Zodiac page.
Lincoln: *reading* "Lucy Umbra is the Cancer Zodiac, and the adopted daughter of the owner of Stylish Occult. She almost never shows emotion, except when she's pushed to her limits when it comes to her rage. She'll often hang out at the gravesite and clean off the vandalized tombstones, even killing those that she catches in the act of vandalizing the gravesite." *stops for a second* Huh… I'm surprised I didn't see her there when I went to the gravesite.
Angel Dust: *smirks* Vandalizing graves? *Lincoln elbows him in the stomach* Oof!
Lincoln: *glares* Annoying dumbass, I was visiting my birth parents' grave. *notices Charlie and Vaggie looking shocked and sympathetic* Extermination.
Charlie hugs Lincoln, which admittedly surprised him.
Charlie: I'm sorry you had to go through that…
Lincoln: *softly smiles* It's okay, Charlie.
Next he taps Luan's picture, which brings him to the Leo Zodiac page. Angel Dust looks at the page, and his eyes widen.
Angel Dust: Oh, THAT'S the bitch that helped me and Cherri in the turf war!
Vaggie: *eye narrows in anger* That I remember.
Purplish red smoke transitions into Luan, Angel Dust and Cherri Bomb fighting Egg Bois.
Cherri Bomb: Heyyy, thanks for the back up, Angie!
Angel Dust: Hahaha! *Cherri Bomb fires a rocket launcher* You kiddin'? This is the best action I've seen in ages! *puts hands behind his head* Who's your other friend?!
Luan: Name's Luan Looney! And I'm here to make a "killing" in this turf war! *laughs a bit psychotically*
Angel Dust: Hah! I like this gal already!
Cherri Bomb: *launching another cherry bomb* Where've you been, anyway? I thought you up and died or some shit!
Angel Dust: *lighting a bomb and handing it to her* Oh, I wish! I've been staying at this crappy hotel on the other side of town. Some broads are lettin' me stay rent-free if I play nice.
The trio cover their heads as the explosion sets off behind them, then grin at each other as they jump into the field.
Angel Dust: *Continues to shoot down Egg Bois with what seems to be a drum mag M1928 Thompson* Y'know, no fights, no pranks, no "problematic language"... Her words, not mine. *steps on a broken tile, launching an Egg Boi airborne and shoots him from behind as he sighs again* These crazy bitches are no fun! I've been clean for two weeks!
Cherri Bomb: *in disbelief, smiling* Ho-ly shit!
Luan: *in disbelief, smiling* I find that hard to believe!
Angel Dust: *looks at the leftover smudge on his finger* Well, sorta clean. *destroys an incoming Egg Boi* Just clean as you can get from a shitload of Bolivian marching powder! *gets chained and thrown aside by Sir Pentious* Ohh~ Harder, daddy! *raises left eyebrow*
Sir Pentious: *taking it seriously as he gasps* Son?!
Angel lowers eyebrow as Cherri kicks Sir Pentious to the side, then Luan uppercuts him, bites his tail and then hurls him across the street.
Sir Pentious: *hood flares open* Grr! You whores have no classss! In war, the side remembered is the side with the most ssstyle! *adjusts tie*
Cherri Bomb: Or the side that ain't dead! *decapitates an Egg Boi*
Luan: *as Angel Dust stands up and removes the chains restricting him* Speakin' of style, is your hat like, alive or some shit?
Sir Pentious: Oh! Well, that's none of your GOD DAMN BUSSSSINESS! Now, is it?
Angel Dust: Hah, would that make your hat the top and you the bottom?
Luan bursts out laughing. A sign that says "Loser" can be seen in the background pointing at Sir Pentious as an Egg Boi acknowledges the roast.
Egg Boi: *cups hands* Oooooh! *gets pebble thrown at him by Sir Pentious*
Sir Pentious: *enraged* I'm going to blow you to bitssss!
Angel Dust: *eyes him up and down* Hm, kinky!
Sir Pentious: Oh, not like that! *hood flares open as a sign that says "Pussy" can be seen pointing at him in the background* Pervert! *knocks over an Egg Boi*
Angel notices an egg boi with a tentacle launcher which causes him to push Cherri and Luan to the side out of fear. Angel gets tangled up in all the tentacles.
Sir Pentious: Not so cocky now, are we?!
Angel Dust: *unamused* Y'know, you really gotta watch what comes outta ya mouth. I've been making these sex jokes the whole *limbs gets pulled on as Sir Pentious reveals a drill which jump starts* TIME! *reveals his third pair of arms carrying a gun* And it's obvious ya ain't catchin' on. I mean, it's just *pulls out M1928* SAD! *shoots it at Sir Pentious*
Cherri Bomb: So, think you're gonna get in a lotta trouble for this?
Angel Dust: Eh, *retracts his third set of arms* what's one little brawl gonna cause?
Brief cut to what that little brawl has caused: Charlie and Katie Killjoy can be seen trying to duke it out on each other like it's some sort of WWE match while a fire alarm goes off in the background with Trench entering the scene, covered in flames.
Tom Trench: WHY WON'T ANYONE HELP ME?!
Cut back to the turf war.
Cherri Bomb: Glad you haven't changed! *slugs him on the arm* You know you're my favorite guy to party with!
Angel Dust: You know it, sugar tits!
Cherri Bomb: *takes out one last bomb* You ready to finish this?
Luan: *grinning like a madman as she pulls out twin daggers* FUCK YEAH!
Angel Dust: *takes out Thompson gun* Born ready, baby!
Luan, Angel and Cherri pounce onto Sir Pentious and his army as they prepare to clash, Charlie and Killjoy are still at each other's throats screaming, Trench is still on fire, screaming in agony. The camera shows all the characters present, screaming as the scene cuts back to the hotel.
Lincoln, Charlie and Vaggie are glaring at Angel Dust in disapproval, while Angel Dust looks content and happy.
Angel Dust: Good fuckin' times. *stands up and stretches, then walks to the stairs* Alright, this readin' shit's borin' me. I'm headin' back up. *walks up the stairs*
Vaggie: *pinches the bridge of her nose* Lo odio tanto… (Translation: I hate him so much…) *looks at Lincoln* You can keep reading if you want, I'm gonna go kill him. *stands up and storms off*
Charlie: *sighs* I better go stop her… *stands up* Lincoln, if you wanna keep the book, go ahead.
With that, she leaves to go stop Vaggie and Angel Dust's upcoming fight that she knows is going to happen.
Lincoln: *chuckles for a bit, then goes back to reading* "Luan Looney is the Leo Zodiac, and a comedian that takes great pride in her jokes and pranks. Some people are scared of her, as she tends to get annoyed with people that insult her jokes. People are especially scared of her on April 1st, as her pranks become more violent and she adopts a more psychotic personality." *shakes his head* So that's why everyone's as scared of April Fools Day as they are of the Extermination… *keeps reading* "The only one that tolerates her jokes and pranks, also keeping her in line, is her girlfriend, a succubus named Maggie Mayday, who happens to be Verosika's younger sister." Hopefully she's not a bitch like Verosika.
He then goes to Bobby's section, bringing him to the Libra Zodiac page.
Lincoln: *reading* "Robert Santiago, better known as Bobby, is the Libra Zodiac. He works quite a few jobs, including a waiter, delivery driver, lifeguard in the Envy Ring's beach, security guard, and grocery clerk. He is married to the Capricorn Zodiac, Lori Evans-Santiago, and the older brother of the Sagittarius Zodiac, Ronalda Anne Santiago. He is rather calm and collected, despite his many stressful jobs, but can be pushed to his limit if provoked enough." Huh… wonder how he and Lori met, and if they knew they were the Zodiacs.
Next was Luna's section, which was the Scorpio Zodiac.
Lincoln: *reading* "Luna Lyric is the Scorpio Zodiac, and may as well have rock-n-roll coursing through her blood. She always plays rock-n-roll for her band, even sometimes hired by Sins like Asmodeus and Beelzebub. The band consists of two friends, Sully and Mazzy, and her fiancé, Sam Sharp. When people piss her off enough, you can expect her to bash their heads in with her guitar." She must break a lot of guitars.
He then changes to Ronnie Anne's section, the Sagittarius Zodiac.
Lincoln: *reading* "Ronalda Anne Santiago, better known as Ronnie Anne, is the Sagittarius Zodiac. She is a vicious Hellhound that you should avoid pissing off. When you hear her angrily mumbling in Spanish, just stay out of her way." *chuckles* Can't wait to see some dumbass in the living world piss her off and get their ass beat. *keeps reading* "Her and Bobby's mother, Maria, works at one of the Sloth Ring hospitals."
He then switches to Lori's section, the Capricorn Zodiac.
Lincoln: *reading* "Lori Evans-Santiago is the Capricorn Zodiac, and married to the Libra Zodiac, Bobby Santiago. She works at the Happy Hotel, but is also a professional golfer. She can be a bit bossy and aggressive, but her heart is in the right place." Surprised she didn't beat me with a golf club when I went berserk and hurt Bobby.
The next section was Clyde's section, the Aquarius Zodiac.
Lincoln: *reading* "Clyde McBride is the Aquarius Zodiac and aspires to be an author. His birth mother gave him up as a baby, leading to him being found by an incubus couple: Howard and Harold McBride." *surprised for a second* Huh… he's just like me…
Finally, he goes to Leni's section, the Pisces Zodiac. This was the last section, excluding his own section.
Lincoln: Alright, last section. *reading* "Leni Bliss is the Pisces Zodiac, and like Lori, works at the Happy Hotel. She specializes in fashion, able to make outfits from scratch with little effort. However, she can be a bit ditzy, leading to some unintentional accidents. Thankfully, these accidents are few and far between, especially thanks to her husband, an incubus named Marcus Moley."
He then closes the book.
Lincoln: *smiles* Well, that's everything I needed to hear.
He decides to take the book with him and leaves the hotel.
The whole time Lincoln is driving back to his apartment, his mind is racing with thoughts about how he's a Zodiac Hellhound. He thought he was just an ordinary Hellhound before, but not anymore. His life was basically changed after that mental conversation with the others. Of course, he knew better than to let this go to his head. However… the fact that he was ranked above the Goetias, that was enjoyable. The reason?
Lincoln: *smiles* Can't wait to see the look on that screeching chicken's face.
He turns the radio on in his car, only to immediately hear Loo Loo Land playing. He scowls in annoyance, then changes the station a few times, passing by songs he hates. But then he stops as he recognizes the beat to one of the songs about to start.
Lincoln: *eyes widen as he grins* Oh, I haven't heard this in a minute!
He turns the volume up and starts singing along.
Lincoln: I got this feelin' inside my bones
It goes electric, wavy when I turn it on
All through my city, all through my home
We're flyin' up, no ceilin', when we in our zone
He begins tapping the door of his car in beat with the song.
Lincoln: I got that sunshine in my pocket
Got that good soul in my feet
I feel that hot blood in my body when it drops (ooh)
I can't take my eyes up off it, movin' so phenomenally
Room on lock, the way we rock it, so don't stop
He pulls up to a stoplight that was red, because unlike most assholes in Hell, he respects the rules of the road.
Lincoln: And under the lights when everything goes
Nowhere to hide when I'm gettin' you close
When we move, well, you already know
So just imagine, just imagine, just imagine
He pulls out a pair of sunglasses and puts them on, then begins to rev up his car. The second the light turns green… he's off!
Lincoln: Nothin' I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance
Feel a good, good creepin' up on you
So just dance, dance, dance, come on
All those things I shouldn't do
But you dance, dance, dance
And ain't nobody leavin' soon, so keep dancin'
Sure enough, he was dancing a bit as he drove.
Lincoln: I can't stop the feelin'!
So just dance, dance, dance
I can't stop the feelin'!
So just dance, dance, dance, come on
He ends up driving next to another car, this one being driven by an Imp. The Imp hears what Lincoln's singing along with and begins bobbing his head.
Lincoln: Ooh, it's something magical
It's in the air, it's in my blood, it's rushin' on (rushin' on)
Then the Imp starts singing, catching Lincoln's attention.
Male Imp: I don't need no reason, don't need control (don't need control)
I fly so high, no ceiling, when I'm in my zone
Lincoln smirks as he and the Imp sing together.
Lincoln and Male Imp: 'Cause I got that sunshine in my pocket
Got that good soul in my feet
I feel that hot blood in my body when it drops (ooh)
I can't take my eyes up off it, moving so phenomenally
Room on lock, the way we rock it, so don't stop
They end up driving past a group of all kinds of hellborn demons, who couldn't help but bop their heads to the beat.
Lincoln: Under the lights when everything goes
Male Imp: Nowhere to hide when I'm gettin' you close
Female Hellhound: When we move, well, you already know
Lincoln: So just imagine
Male Imp and Female Hellhound: Just imagine
Group of Demons: Just imagine
Soon, it was like the entire streets of Hell were singing along.
Lincoln and Crowd: Nothing I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance
Feel a good, good creepin' up on you
So just dance, dance, dance, come on
All those things I shouldn't do
But you dance, dance, dance
And ain't nobody leavin' soon, so keep dancin'
Crowd: I can't stop the feelin'!
Lincoln: So just dance, dance, dance
Crowd: I can't stop the feelin'!
Lincoln: So just dance, dance, dance
Crowd: I can't stop the feelin'!
Lincoln: So just dance, dance, dance
Crowd: I can't stop the feelin'! (Yeah)
Lincoln: So keep dancin', come on
Lincoln keeps driving as he notices demons dancing to the song.
Lincoln: Oh, yeah, oh
Male Imp: I can't stop the
Female Hellhound: I can't stop the
Incubus: I can't stop the
Imp Child: I can't stop the
Lincoln grins and turns the volume up to max.
Crowd: I can't stop the feelin'!
Everyone: Nothin' I can see but you when you dance, dance, dance (I can't stop the feelin'!)
Feel a good, good creepin' up on you
So just dance, dance, dance, come on (I can't stop the feelin'!)
All those things I shouldn't do
But you dance, dance, dance (dance, dance, dance) (I can't stop the feelin'!)
And ain't nobody leavin' soon, so keep dancin' (I can't stop the feelin'!)
Lincoln: Everybody sing
Crowd: Got this feeling in my body (I can't stop the feelin'!)
Got this feeling in my body (I can't stop the feelin'!)
Wanna see you move your body (I can't stop the feelin'!)
Got this feelin' in my body
Lincoln: Break it down
Crowd: Got this feelin' in my body (can't stop the feelin'!)
Got this feelin' in my body, come on (ooh)
As the song ends, everyone goes back to their normal day. Lincoln turns the volume down, but decides to then just turn off the radio altogether.
Lincoln: Well, that was fun. *hears his phone ringing and answers it* Hello?
Millie: *on the phone* Hey sweetie, ya might wanna come into the office.
Lincoln: Sure, what's up?
Millie: *on the phone* Well, I think ya oughta see for yourself.
Lincoln: Alright, Mom. I'll be there in 15 minutes.
He hangs up and floors it, wondering just what the big surprise was.
A/N: The song was "Can't Stop the Feeling" by Justin Timberlake