"For best results, use stereo headphones in a quiet room where you will not be disturbed. So, you'd like to try being hypnotized? I can see why you'd be interested. It's a curious idea..."
Flug had been through this before and by this point all the video openings kind of blended together. Hey, maybe that helped. He was only half paying attention to the actual words, occupying his mind more with the dizzying patterns of spirals and the dulcid tones of the man speaking.
"Perhaps you find yourself wondering...how does it feel? Will you have any control? Will you have any idea of what's being done to you?" In Flug's experience, yes. "Or will your mind just find itself becoming a helpless plaything? Still...you're curious. You want to know more, to see what it can do to you." Flug wouldn't lie and say he didn't. "You've come to the right place."
Well gee, I sure hope so 94. Flug thought. I AM here for a reason.
"Get comfortable, sitting or laying down...slow your breathing...and enjoy my words as they begin to enchant you..."
Already done, he knew the deal here. Flug was sitting in his underwear and the old, worn t-shirt that he wore to bed. He also had on thigh-highs socks, soft blue ones with little clouds. They sort of matched his shirt, as it was now a pretty faded blue with the remnants of a cartoony plane on it. His headphones were snug over his ears, making him for all intents and purposes, dead to the world around him. Some fly-boy could come crashing through the window in a fight for his life and Flug would probably wonder if there was an earthquake.
"Listening relaxes you... Stills your body... Soothes your mind... Calms away your worries... Slows your breathing... Focuses your attention... So easy..."
This was pretty standard stuff, though this guy had some interesting music in his videos. Flug wondered if these were more of those "binaural beats" things other people used. Though, those tended to be overpowering. And pulsating. And honestly made it kind of hard for him to relax. This was closer to...a cymbal, maybe. Like a reverberation of a sound, or something. It stayed more or less constant, which was far more preferable.
"Such a natural mindset to slip into...especially when your mind is guided by someone who knows exactly what he's doing."
Yeah, Flug guessed it was. It had definitely gotten easier over the course of his sleepless nights. Whether the exact reason was something natural or he'd just does this so often he could do it in his sleep (ha ha, his sleep), was subject to debate. His only complaint was that he had no one to debate but himself. He wondered if his sleeplessness was one of the things he contractually wasn't allowed to talk about. What if he followed every sentence with "hypothetically, of course"? Was that a loophole he could take advantage of?
"Maybe you want to find yourself following. Focusing... Relaxing... Surrendering... Losing control... Without even realizing it... Recalling nothing later..." Flug wouldn't say he recalled nothing. But, to be fair, it was a little fuzzy. That's kind of what this sounded like, come to think of it. Fuzzy. Could a sound be fuzzy?
"Is it exciting to find yourself caught? To find yourself captivated... Drawn... Captured... Unable and unwilling to resist..."
...Kind of...
"Like a moth to a flame... Every attempt to fight, every attempt to resist... Just makes my words grow stronger. Just makes their pull grow greater. Makes you feel weak, makes you realize you're caught... Feel yourself growing calmer...more attentive...more obedient..."
His breathing was nice and steady. And he supposed he was paying a bit more attention. Not sure either of those qualified as being more obedient. So he was calming down. Good. That's what he was supposed to be doing anyways.
"And discovering this feels good. Erotic in ways you'd never considered before..."
Oh, he'd considered.
"Enchanted... Aroused... Captivated... Controlled... You feel so good... So focused... Your mind is an open book... Your inhibitions melting away... To open your mind up to me... To focus where I want you to focus, to share what I want you to share...feels good... Don't worry, you may be my prisoner here, but I will be very nice to you."
Why did that make him think of Black Hat? Was it just that same sentiment of You are mine and you will do as I say. But I'll treat you well. Even throw in dental coverage and a compliment every now and again. May I kiss you? You can kiss me if you want. This is totally what healthy relationships are like, what are you talking about? You can say no. Sometimes. If that's what you really want. Maybe.
"So nice that you may not want to go. You're not going to give away any bank details, you're not going to injure yourself or anyone else," Except he would. "But you are going to bare your mind. You are going to bare your fantasies. You're thinking of them now." Aw yeah, getting to the good stuff. "The ways you want to be played with...the kinks that drive you wild..."
Oh yes, he was thinking of them. Maybe you should suggest something? He thought. What do you think I should be for you?
"Maybe you'd like to be my Pet;" OH jesus he forgot about that. Why did that have to be the first thing he said? Flug was instantly un-relaxed. "Crawling, affectionate, kneeling at my feet..." Feet in motherfucking designer shoes, Flug don't know fancy shoe brands, Louboutins? Why was he thinking of this and why did it make his heart beat so fast?
"Maybe you'd like to be my Doll; Dressed, posed, a toy to be played with..." Calm down, calm down, calm down, get back into it, that wasn't even an odd suggestion. A couple different people referred to their viewers as "pet", or otherwise incorporated that particular word. Nothing unusual, nothing new. Just keep breathing, listen to the music, listen to the voice, and relax.
"Maybe you'd like to be my Slave; Submissive, eager to serve and pleasure me..." Ahhh yes, the most popular thing Flug had encountered in his nightly hypno binges. You could almost call it a trope. The Hypnotized Slave suggestion. Because why wouldn't someone want to be mindlessly devoted to a faceless voiceover like a 50's American housewife caricature? Being agreeable, subservient, and either content with it or unable to think too hard about it.
As well as being unbearably horny, of course.
"Maybe you have your own fantasies and kinks. Maybe something I've suggested rings true with you though..."
And now here it was, the actual hypnosis part of a hypnosis video. The first quarter or even half of the video was composed of a spiral loop and a soothing voice speaking softly and repetitively in the same pattern over and over again. This is what (supposedly) slips the viewer into trance. Then, it was time for the classic hypnosis countdown, starting from ten down to one just like in the movies and magic shows. Thankfully no one had ever said the cliché You are getting veeerry veeerrryyyy verrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyy sleeeeeeeeeeeeeepppyy.
"I tell you to feel sexy, and that's just what you feel. Sensual... Sexual... Seductive... Inviting..." Yeah...yeah he looked good. He looked real good. Good enough to get himself a rich foreign sugar daddy without even trying. Who had no problems with his murderous streak and could be swayed by some tears and a "sir" here and there.
"I tell you to feel aroused, and that's just what you feel. Excited... Enticed... Horny... Turned on..." OOooh fffuck yes. He was feeling it. A bit guiltily as always, but he was feeling it. He wanted to touch himself but all he could seem to do was sit there and enjoy the feeling in his crotch.
"I tell you to feel helpless, and that's just what you are. Captive... Controlled... Powerless... Weak..." Yes. All tied up and nowhere to go.
"Now, your mind is open. My words relax you. You love this feeling. You want to think and feel whatever you're told to." That sounded so much easier. "You want to feel powerless. You want all resistance to be stripped from you." Yes. "You know you longed for this to happen."
Yes. He did. He's always wanted it. From the very beginning. That's why he wanted him. Why he was so drawn to him despite everything. Why even his name was enough to make him feel guilty.
"Obedience is Pleasure and Pleasure is Obedience." Also a classic phrase. Had it been in a book? It sounded like something that would be in some old classic they make kids read in high school. Any possible titles escaped his mind.
"Have you ever had a blank mind? I mean a really blank mind. When there are no thoughts at all. I mean just nothing in your head. Nothing at all, just blank... What do you think that would feel like? Would you even be able to think about that?" Good question. What were his thoughts on having no thoughts? Sounded like a fallacy, but he might not know what that means. "In fact, the more you think about it the harder it is to think at all..." Huh. His mind was kind of foggy. "All you have is a blank mind, completely empty of all thoughts... The emptier your mind is, the happier you are... Each time I say the words 'blank mind', your mind completely empties of all thoughts."
Oooh. Neat.
"Each time you see or hear the words 'blank mind' your mind empties of all thoughts ten times faster... Each time you see or hear the words 'blank mind' you find it to be ten times more powerful... Blank mind. Blank mind."
"Blank mind."
"Blank mind. Blank mind."
"Blank mind. Blank mind. Blank mind. Blank mind.
"Blank mind."
"So, how do you know if you have been brainwashed? How do you know if it worked? There is one way... A test. I am going to give you five things to do before you come out of trance. You will like this video, subscribe to my channel if you haven't already, leave a comment telling me about your experience, watch all my other videos, and you will send me a personal message. My email is in the video description below. You know what to do."
The video ended after a few seconds. Flug blinked once or twice and kind of shook himself out of things. He exited out of full screen and scrolled down. He was already subscribed and he'd liked this video before, so there was no need to do either of those things. He'd left a comment before as well, helpfully at the top of the comment section like his past self was trying to shame him. He decided he'd leave another, something a bit more constructive this time. "Great as always. But I'd love it if it lasted longer. I think it'd be good if you expanded on some of the suggestions you put in your videos. Maybe drag things out a little? I like your other brainwashing videos where it goes on longer, could you do more like that?"
There was still an ache in his panties, which Flug opted to ignore in favor of continuing to deny himself for as long as he could stand. He intentionally chose videos that he knew would place him on the edge without pushing him over too soon. The night (er, morning?) was young, it was only like 2:30. He had plenty of time to scroll through videos and edge himself within an inch of his mind. He figured that was a good use of time, since he couldn't exactly work and still had a day or two before his big "date night".
Black Hat said the best thing he could do to prepare himself for this was to relax and go into things calmly. Flug was listening to him, because that was the sanest thing he'd said in all the time Flug had known him. It was really pretty standard advice when presenting anything. Everyone always says, "Don't overthink it, just calm down and get out there and do it." This was what he'd done to try and prepare himself when he presented the Stun Gun for his club, and this was kind of like that. Black Hat had made the same comparison, even. So he must be doing the right thing, right? It wouldn't do him any good to freak himself out thinking about everything that could go wrong (he distracts Black Hat from kidnapping someone, he gives them away somehow, the Stun Gun malfunctions in some way, the person refuses to die, some other unforeseen flaw comes up and ruins everything). He should really relax. That was the best thing for him right now The videos said the same thing, he couldn't focus properly if he wasn't relaxed. He really needed to be relaxed.
Flug went back to the main channel and scrolled back to where he'd been before. He'd watched nearly all of these at least once before, and now he was going back and rewatching his favorites. He was glad to have found this channel, this guy had a lot of videos and a lot of variety. A few of them were very clearly intended for women, but overall it was kind of gender-neutral. If the "touch yourself" command wasn't too descriptive, it was easy enough for Flug to play along without even thinking about it.
He was still on the fence about whether or not this hypnotism thing actually worked. As a man of science, he was willing to admit that the swirling repetitive motions of the spirals coupled with the soothing tones and deliberately paced speech patterns of the narrators did have an effect on him. Controlling his breathing as he did (per their instructions) slowed his heart rate, which released tension and calmed him. There was science behind it. Whether or not that did in fact put him in a trance or any other state of heightened suggestion was still not proven. He never felt forced to do anything.
Like this one, Hypnotic Torture: Denial. It was probably one of his favorites. It had this great part where it controlled how he masturbated. It ended with, guess what, denying himself his orgasm. And it was enjoyably within Flug's boundaries. All he had to do was sit there, follow along, and enjoy himself. It wasn't until he got to the Money Slave Hypnosis videos where Flug started to draw lines. He enjoyed this content, but he wasn't about to be paying money for it. Sorry wey, I'll give you all the views you want but I will not be donating to your or your . Not even with the promise of personal hypnosis videos. That was actually part of the reason he didn't do it, that was just...too close. He didn't want some stranger over the internet getting in any way, shape, or form, "personal" with him.
Even with the whole "you have no resistance, you have no free will," speil, Flug was more than capable of just not doing something if he wasn't comfortable with it. Like if he was told to take a photo of himself for whatever reason, or if he was told to send some kind of sexual message to the person's email. That didn't feel safe so he didn't do it. That was far too much interaction for him. He wasn't here to become someone else's slave, he was just trying to unwind.
Flug had to stop and lightly slap himself in the face for that one. Someone else's? What was he thinking? Why was he thinking? Why could he not just be brainless for longer than two minutes?
And why was he slowly stroking himself through his blue and white striped panties? The same ones he'd been wearing when-
No. No no no, that was enough of that. Onto the next video. What should he watch, what should he watch? Blank and Mindless Hypnosis, saw it an hour ago. IQ Reduction Hypnosis, hmmm. He wasn't looking to be stupid, just calm. Personality Reprogramming Hypnosis, ehhhhh he wasn't in the mood to believe his name was Zane. Hypnotic Breath Game, he liked that one but it didn't really fit with what it was he wanted to get out of this. Kitty Hypnosis, no, he hadn't really been into that. Too bad. Vampire's Snack Hypnosis, was he sure that wasn't his fetish? Because he didn't seem to have any problem with Black Hat biting and sucking his neck like a Dracula revamp. Was he actually drinking his blood? Did Flug ever ask why the fuck Black Hat's teeth were sharp enough to leave literal holes in his flesh? Or at least ask why Black Hat was biting him hard enough to leave literal holes in his flesh? Is he just into that?
Flug leaned back and rubbed his neck. He had to roll his eyes, wasn't he trying not to think about it? About how he'd made out with Black Hat. Again. He'd even gone and brought him to the bedroom. It had just...the couch felt awkward. It was kind of weird positioning for him, he spent a lot of time there and if they did it there he would just think about it all the time, the bed was better. He hardly used the thing anymore himself. Might as well make it his designated "Make Out with The Hat Man" spot.
Was that going to happen more often now? Had Flug agreed to periodic necking, perhaps more? It hadn't felt like a one-time thing, especially since it was the third time. And this time Flug had-
Flug rubbed his eyes. No, no this was not helpful. Not a helpful train of thought right now. Too much was going on with the upcoming "date night" for him to be thinking of this. Especially with him being as hard as he was right now. He needed to relax. He should really get back to watching his videos. He was good and worked up, maybe it was time to start thinking about relieving some of that stress his new life of crime was causing him. What was he looking at? Vampire's Snack Hypnosis, Enslaved in School, Enslaved by Teacher, Hypnosis for Wet Dreams, Puppet Hypnosis-
Oh. Hey. Look at that. He hadn't watched that one before. Puppet hypnosis huh? It was probably similar to the other videos, just with the word "puppet" instead of "slave". Maybe a few other words switched out here and there. A line or two rewritten, a few different visuals if it was one of those roleplay style videos. Which it probably was, judging by the thumbnail.
Flug didn't think he wanted to be anyone's puppet. He'd had about enough of puppeteers to last a lifetime. Aurelio had probably ruined it for him forever. Which is a damn shame, because that used to be Flug's go-to fantasy. Then again, Aurelio had been his go-to fantasy. If no one else came to mind, no one in the world of 2D doing it for him right then, he thought about Aurelio. Flug could still picture what he looked like in his teens. His features weren't as chiseled, he wasn't as built, wasn't as tall, his shoulders weren't so broad yet. He was every bit as petty though. Even back then he would hold a grudge over the littlest shit. Flug would follow him, he saw him go off with other kids (meaning he forced them to lead the way to their own beat down) behind the school and out by the dumpsters. Flug was careful to stay quiet and out of sight. He knew he'd probably be next if Aurelio knew he was following him and watching him do things like this. He was a big fan of the old "Stop hitting yourself, stop hitting yourself," back then. He probably still was.
God that was pathetic. What had Flug seen in him? Maybe it had been cute five or so years ago, but they were fucking adults now. That was child's play, could he really think of no better way to use his Gift?
Flug could think of better things he could do. If he had a Gift like Aurelio's his life would be so much easier. He could probably make all his victims deaths look like unfortunate accidents, or suicides. Maybe he could just stop their hearts, with nothing more than a touch and a thought. He could do whatever he wanted, he could have whoever he wanted. Aurelio Cruz wouldn't be out of his league, he'd be out of Aurelio's. His Gift was wasted on him, Flug hoped he knew that. So much potential, in the hands of someone with no imagination. Flug had an imagination. With all the nights he'd spent dreaming of him, he'd probably spent more time thinking about what Aurelio could do than Aurelio ever had. So many nights, hiding under the covers, thinking about him. Thinking about Aurelio taking him behind the school, making him kneel in the trash where no one could see. Making him do naughty things. Things that were wrong, things that he really shouldn't be doing, but it was Aurelio. He didn't have a choice. He made him do those things. It wasn't that he wanted to, he was being forced to do it. He couldn't stop it. He knew it was wrong, he knew it was bad, he knew he wasn't supposed to be thinking of other boys this way, he-
He...
He stood up and walked over to the mirror. He was thinking maybe he had some unresolved issues here. He knew it wasn't true, that there was absolutely nothing wrong with who he was attracted to or what he felt. It was not wrong for him to be himself. He knew that. It was honestly the least bad thing he'd ever done in his life, why did he feel so ashamed? He didn't feel this bad about murder, and that was entirely a choice he had made. He had made no choice regarding who he was attracted to. If anything he should feel guilty about being a stalker and a murderer, not about being gay. It hadn't been a choice for him to find other guys hot. It hadn't been a choice for him to enjoy panties and things. It had been a choice to try, but it hadn't been a choice to like it.
He twisted this way and that way, checking himself out. He dressed like this for him. Because he liked to look this way. He liked how the long socks and stockings felt on his legs. He liked wearing panties. Why did he feel bad about it? Why did it seem like he sought out ways to feel bad about it? Why was there always this underlying feeling of everything he enjoyed being so very, very wrong? Naughty, dirty, sinful, not something he was supposed to like. He wasn't supposed to be that way. He wasn't supposed to like men. He wasn't supposed to like lace and satin and frills and pink and everything that went along with it. He wasn't supposed to like being someone's Pet, much less like it so much he got a goddamned nosebleed.
There's nothing wrong with that, you know. Black Hat's voice whispered in his head. It's ok to like it.
Whatever Flug had said in response to that, he wanted to take it back and tell him Hat-Man, this has never been ok. Not once in my life has it been ok for me to be this way.
He almost wanted to talk to Black Hat about it, maybe he could relate some, but that would require him to actually talk and words had never been his strong suit. It had been an ordeal just to talk about why being fucking paralyzed had put him a bit on edge. Good luck getting Flug to open up about his feelings.
It didn't help that Black Hat was simultaneously the first person he thought of and the last person he wanted to talk to. He wasn't sure if it was really appropriate to get so...personal, like that. Black Hat seemed to have a kind of "let things happen, see where it goes" attitude, which Flug could maybe get on board with? He'd admit that there was certainly...something between them. Black Hat did have qualities that Flug liked and appreciated, maybe even was attracted to, a little. And Flug must have some qualities that Black Hat found...attractive.
Did he find himself attractive? Flug supposed he liked wide shoulders, not as thin, maybe a little taller. Someone who dressed nice, didn't need constant reassurance. Someone with some actual confidence. Maybe he just wasn't his type. What was Black Hat's type? Skinny, awkward, genius? Since he was pan, he might be attracted to similar things in both men and women. Was Flug's closet effeminacy something he liked? It wasn't any kind of dealbreaker, that was for sure.
Flug took his shirt off and eyed himself again. He couldn't stop himself from running his hands over his chest and neck, over all the bruises Black Hat had left on him this time. Along with another weird splotchy rash, spanning from his cheek and jawline down all the way past his belly button near the hem of his underwear. The first time, he'd thought it was some kind of weird sunburn. Now he was starting to wonder if he was somehow allergic to Black Hat. He didn't know what else could cause this. The skin was pinkish, slightly redder in certain spots. Those were also the most tender areas. They might be in places Black Hat had paid more attention to. Did he really find Flug's scrawny torso attractive? Flug couldn't think of any other plausible reason he would trail his tongue (and the rest of his mouth) down Flug's body. Or ask to kiss him again. Was Black Hat's type literally bone-thin weirdos who occasionally find an excuse to kill people?
What was Flug's type? Was there any commonality between the people he liked? He liked Kamina from Gurren Lagann because of his determination and resolve. Not to mention he had badass shades and a cape, and rock hard abs, and led a resistance force of giant robots, and had a cool sword. He liked Griffith from Berserk because of how far he was willing to go for his ambition, and if you say there was nothing between him and Guts you are wrong. He supposed he thought Aurelio was like that, someone driven and proud, not afraid to fight dirty if it would bring him closer to his goal. Julio hadn't been that underhanded, he was more just...mischievous. It wasn't that he was bad, it just so happened that this thing they'd both been led to believe was bad suited him. It was just how he was. Like some kind of dashing rogue or something. Black Hat was more like the mastermind in the shadows, the big boss that does nothing but send his minions out because he's too busy sitting around looking cool. Like a less whiny Lelouch vi Britannia, or a more evil Sadao Maou. That was funny, Black Hat struck him as eviller than a character who was supposed to be Satan himself. He supposed that was something all his little heartthrobs had in common, even the protagonists weren't exactly the good guys. Even the ones that were morally right were still rebels in their world. Bending the rules was fair game, if they had motive and opportunity. Breaking them was never out of the question, it was just a matter of what rules and why. People who did what they wanted, regardless of whether or not it was justified. If they weren't in the right, they then were satisfied being wrong. It was their choice, they didn't need approval from anything or anyone else. He supposed that was what he really liked about them; that kind of I-do-what-I-want, devil-may-care attitude. Morality be damned, I know I am.
Flug saw his reflection go wide-eyed.
Do I have a thing for...BAD BOYS?
Oh no, oh brother that was some crrrrrrrrringe. Flug felt so embarrassed that he put that string of words together, even mentally. He walked backwards into bed, flopping down and curling up, still pawing at his bare stomach. Still ignoring an uncomfortable hard-on, his arousal hadn't quite dwindled down completely. Flug gave a mental Fuck it and slipped his cock out. He started out quickly, he didn't spend all this time working himself up for nothing. He wanted to relieve some goddamn stress before he went out and killed...some guy.
Ok, not helpful. Not arousing. He needed to think about something that would get him back in the mood. C'mon, he made out with an older guy in this very bed like a day ago, he had recent experiences to think back on and fantasize about! Flug head lolled to the side, going even faster up and down his shaft. Even if his mind wasn't cooperating, his body would still have a reaction to this, right? It reacted when Black Hat touched him. When he was kissing and sucking at his body, just barely within the lines Flug had made.
Did Flug just taste good? Was that why Black Hat liked to kiss and suck and bite him? Or did he really think Flug looked good like this? He said he liked him. He said he wanted to kiss him. He said he liked the sounds he made. Flug knew he liked it when Flug called him "Master". Though that last one after he asked to go along for their big kidnapping date might've been pushing it. Black Hat agreed to it, kind of reluctantly, Flug just thought it would sweeten the deal, kind of. What, he trusts him to kill people but not to sit quietly and observe? That was a good 40% of what science is! At least! And Flug was asking him for this, practically begging, just to not be left on the bench until Black Hat decided he could be a part of this thing he agreed to be a part of!
Black Hat had looked almost mad after Flug said that, though. Flug could practically feel the change in the air. That hadn't happened in a while. It felt like he was calling Flug's bluff, in a way. Like, If you're going to act like a sugarbaby then I expect my sugar. What was he even mad about, he was the one who wanted to make up so badly. Flug didn't make him do anything, he insisted. And if he was really sorry about it then he wouldn't argue, he'd just do it.
"Mmmmm," Flug slowed his hand down, he was starting to feel it again. Black Hat had seemed really sorry. The man may be a villain, but he wasn't heartless. He'd shown concern for Flug's wellbeing, he'd tried to cheer him up when he was down. He admitted when he did wrong. He respected Flug's boundaries, for the most part. He hadn't ever made Flug feel bad about himself. Flug was gay, hey, he was pan. Flug had killed people, him too, no big whoop. Flug liked to wear ladies lingerie, and he looked damn good in it too.
Flug couldn't help but go faster as he continued to think of him. He said he was looking forward to watching Flug kill a completely random stranger. That there was nothing he looked forward to more. He had absolute faith in him. Flug wasn't going to let him down. He was going to be a Good Pet and murder whoever it was Master kidnapped for him. He did it just for him. He went out and built Flug somewhere safe where nothing bad could happen, no one would find out, and he could be villainous all he wanted. It really did almost feel like a date. Would this be their second date? Flug slowed his hand down again, biting his lip to keep from nagging himself to stop being such a tease. Had Black Hat tried to take him on a date to cheer him up after Aurelio outed him? He said it didn't have to be a date, but had he intended it to be one? Had he asked him to the movies as a date? Movie, dinner, classic date night. Had he wanted to help get Flug's mind off things? Flug was almost sorry he hadn't taken him up on it, maybe it would've made things a little easier now. Maybe he wouldn't question it so much when Black Hat tried to be nice. He did try. He cared about him, in his own way.
Then again, after he'd questioned it, Black Hat had tried to kiss him. Flug still wondered if he'd had more in mind. If Flug let him do it, would he take it farther? How far? If Flug didn't stop him at all, how far would he go? It came back to him so clearly, how they'd been standing there in between the kitchen and the living room, Black Hat holding him so close, kissing his way up Flug's arm until they were face to face. Right there. Holding him securely so he couldn't run away from him. Had his head so he couldn't turn away. Because he couldn't give half-assed answers anymore, and if he did Black Hat would just answer for him. He was going to do it, unless Flug told him to stop. If he couldn't do that, Black Hat wouldn't stop. Not until he got what he wanted.
Him.
He was right there, in front of his face. Eye filled with hunger.
"Now, I am going to kiss you, unless you stop me."
"W-Wait, Black Hat, I-I-" I'm not sure if I'm ready and I don't know if I want it to be you or if I just want it so bad I only imagine it's you.
Black Hat got up close and personal, so close to his lips already. "Decide, my Pet. What do you want?"
There was no time to decide, he leaned in and he was there, on his mouth and pressing strongly. Not forceful, just firm. Strong. Like his grasp, pressing their bodies together. Beginning to move gently. His lips opened for Black Hat, sinking into his touch and falling down far into the steaming pits of longing. He reached his hands up to wrap around his head and return his fervor three times over. He began producing sharp whines for his Master, his arousal making his body feel wound up and tight.
Black Hat pulled away and panted lightly. "So, you want this?"
"Y-Yes," He gulped down air. "I want you so much right now."
"Good," Black Hat kissed him again, holding him tight and leaving no opportunity for escape. Not that Flug would. "Because I want you too."
"You, you do?"
"Yes. I've waited long enough to make you mine. I've got your soul," He lifted Flug up by the seat of his pants, the skinny scientists legs wrapping around him instinctively. "And now I want your body."
He couldn't say anything in response to that. Not even in a fantasy. Just responding to his touch and being vaguely aware of the scene changing. No longer were they in the living room but in his bedroom. Both of them already down to their respective underwear, though Flug had on something a bit more saucy than usual. Even for him. Which he could not have had under his usual apparel. Face-down against the bed, Black Hat on top of him and whispering in his ear.
"Is this just for me?" He asked, running bare fingers (they were normal, since Flug didn't know what his hands actually looked like) across the frilly trim of Flug's skirt. Reaching under it to play with his most sensitive parts.
"A-Ah-Yes!" Flug squeaked. The feeling of his hands through the thin fabric sending exhilarating waves of lightning through him.
"Not for your little stalkee?"
"N-No." He gripped the sheets tight. "I'd never wear anything like this for him. Not anymore."
"You'd only wear this for me?" The hot breath of Black Hat tickled the back of Flug's neck, making him squirm between his body and the bed.
"Yes Master."
"Bene, bene," Black Hat murmured into his neck, sucking and nipping like he was getting ready to take a chunk of the supple flesh right out of him. His bare hands played with him under his sumptuous attire, tracing intricately woven lace patterns and making Flug move against his touch in his ecstasy. Even in a fantasy though, he found himself freezing a bit once Black Hat hooked a finger around the waistband of his panties.
"Get ready," Oh God that was so hot, the way he wasn't presenting him with any options or asking him if he really wanted this anymore. Just commanding that he prepare himself for what was about to happen.
Flug's face was half-buried in the sheets and his pillow, but he managed to stutter out a few words as his undergarment was pulled down, exposing his ripe cheeks. His voice sounded so small, so ready to be disputed. Corrected. "P-Please be gen-gentle." Like I tell people you are.
"Oh, Roci," Black Hat maneuvered around to meet his gaze, grinning smugly. The purr of his name coming out like he'd called him that a million times before. "We both know that's not what you really want from me."
"N-No," He admitted. "But I-"
Black Hat kissed him again, stealing his air and what was left of his fight. "Relax, My Pet. I won't hurt you. Just relax and let me take care of you."
"Ok, Master, ok." Rocinante found himself nodding, allowing his panties to be slipped down to his ankles and his lower half repositioned. This was his fantasy, so there wasn't any real need for gentleness. He could take anything here, it couldn't hurt him. Unless he wanted it to. And if he did, that was his business. No one else's. Not even Black Hat's, since this wasn't really him. Just the him that Rocinante imagined so that he could have a little bit of fun without worrying about consequences tonight. He wouldn't know how Rocinante imagined him to be, he'd never know that he'd fantasized about him at all. He could do whatever he wanted. Could have whatever he wanted done to him. By whoever he wanted. And if at anytime he felt guilty about any of it, he could feel guilty afterwards because this was far more intense that any of his other fantasies had ever been and he wouldn't let something as ridiculous as guilt get in the way of enjoying it to its fullest. It was just a fantasy after all, whatever happened here had no effect on what happened in real life.
He pushed in roughly, making Rocinante cry out. After a few strokes, getting the feel of it, he picked up the pace and kept at a fast but even rhythm. Rocinante tried to focus on breathing, taking in air while he took in his Master. His body rocked back and forth against the bed. He held onto the sheets for purchase, so he could push back against him. He could feel his body being stretched by his Master's sex, how it reached deep inside to his core and forced licentious moans into the pillows. He clung desperately to keep himself in place as his Master increased his force and started to really pound into him in earnest. None of this should've been possible without sufficient lubrication, but this was a fantasy after all. The rules of reality were subject to change.
As for what it felt like...it felt pleasurable. Rocinante hadn't ever actually experimented with that part of his body save for a tentative finger. He and Julio hadn't gone that far, they'd only been bold enough to experiment with their mouths. Mostly Flug's, in truth. He'd been up for anything back then.
He'd wanted so badly to finally be able to open up to someone. He'd been dreaming of finding someone like him. It had been almost too good to be true. Rocinante left home at the totally emotionally mature age of 17 and within his first weeks outside of the nest finds a cute guy in his unit who just so happens to also be gay and relates to his problems at home and is just so easy to talk to! Who was kind of a little sneak, and liked to tease Rocinante a bit about all the secret kisses he'd shared with other boys back home. He was so daring like that. He didn't want word getting out about them either, but he never let that hold him back. He never let being afraid stop him from living his life. You'd almost think he wasn't afraid. Rocinante really liked that about him. He didn't want to drag things down by worrying too much. He wanted to just let go like Julio and enjoy what was happening between them. They were always careful, everything was going to be fine.
Rocinante didn't want to be the one stifling his boyfriends free spirit. He'd leave that job to their drill instructor. No, he wanted to be right on the edge with him.-
-"So, um," He cleared his throat, hoping not to break down into stutters. "What, exactly, do I do here?"
"Well, first it goes in your mouth. Then you just kind of bob your head back and forth, and suck."
"Yeah, I could figure out that much." Rocinante grumbled.
"Then what do you want to know? Some good moves?" Julio laughed a little bit. It was cute, the way the little lines around his eyes crinkled when he smiled. "There's no secret technique I'm going to teach you that gets a guy to cum in two seconds."
"I'm pretty sure that's what we don't want to happen."
"How would you know?"
"That sounds like the most anticlimactic climax imaginable."
Julio laughed some more, and squatted down to be eye level with him. God, the way his eyes sparkled. "And you say you don't know what you're doing."
"Because I don't."
"You're turning me on, I'm pretty sure that's what we're trying to do here."
"So you like seeing me on my knees. I'll remember that."
Julio kept laughing, trying very hard to keep it as light as possible. "Stop it! You're going to get us caught!"
"Me? You're the one who wants me to kneel before the king or whatever."
"Wha-What?!" He fell on the floor, pulling Rocinante on top of him. Rocinante's eyes went wide, he couldn't believe what position they were in! Not that Julio was phased at all. He just grabbed Rocinante by the sides of his head and pulled him into a quick kiss. And many more to follow. All over his cheeks and chin and once on his nose. They were both a struggling, stifled pair of giggles before long, both telling the other to shut up before someone heard them.
"'Kneel before the king,' where do you get these kinky ideas?" Julio asked him after the giggle-fit passed.
"I don't know. I just...I don't know. I was thinking kneeling, and knights, I guess, and...Yeah it's pretty stupid, huh? I'm sorry."
"Don't be sorry," Julio held him by the chin and guided him back to his lips. "Just keep doing what you're doing. I like that."
"Ok, but, what am I doing?"
"Being yourself. Just keep doing that and you can do anything you want with me."
"Like wh-what?" Oh God he stuttered. No, no, keep it controlled. Keep it nice and easy. It was only because of how suggestively Julio had said that. He swore, one of these days he was just going to cheesily blush at Julio like some goddamned anime character and their dirty little secret would be out.
"Well, we came back here for a reason. It may have something to do with my fly being down. We can get back to that, if you want."
"Oh, oh yeah. Right, right." Rocinante scooted down his body until he was facing Julio's, ahem, equipment. He eyed it nervously, he'd never been this close to another besides his own. It wasn't that he didn't like what he saw, believe him it was doing insane things to his insides, but he just didn't know how to...begin. Did you really just stick it in your mouth and suck? Nothing else to it? What if it didn't fit? Would that be considered a good thing or a bad thing? Oh God he didn't have a clue what he was doing, why did he agree to this? He'd never done anything like this before and now with this guy he's only known for-
"Hey, Roci?" Rocinante looked back to Julio, propped up on his elbows. He looked a bit more serious than usual, his typical playful grin nowhere to be seen. "I've never actually done this either."
"R-Really?"
"Heh, just cuz you kiss a guy doesn't mean you gotta blow him too. I hope that's not why you let me talk you into this."
"No, no I-I want to do this." He said, going back to the piece of anatomy before him. "And hey, no matter what I do, you can't complain because you have no one to compare me to."
"Yeah! I'll like it, even if it's bad!"
"Oh thanks for the big vote of confidence Julio. See how you like it now."
"Ha ha! It don't matter, Roci. You could be the most sexually inept person on the planet, I'd still like you."
Oh Jesus his face felt so hot right now. As a matter of fact he felt hot all over. Was he sweating? He felt sweaty. "Yeah, w-w-ell, good." He stuttered out. "Because I probably am." He reached out his hand and figured he knew enough to be able to do the basics and if not, well, he'd learn as he went.-
-Well, that kind of took him out of the mood.
Sigh, the same old shit all over again. He thinks he's over it, he tries moving on, tries thinking about a whole new person even, but he can't help but dwell on the past. Was it normal to constantly think of your ex when you enter a new relationship? He supposed he didn't really know, having been in only one previously and being highly suspicious of the one he was in currently. Whether it was for show or not by this point, he couldn't deny that they were in a relationship. Exactly what kind of relationship was unclear to say the least, but to Flug it seemed like Black Hat was trying for some sort of employer-employee-friends-with-benefits type of thing. Was there any difference between friends with benefits and straight up fuck buddies? Flug didn't know, and wasn't sure he really wanted something like that in his search history.
What he wanted was to fucking relax.
When Flug finally did manage to rub one out and leave himself a panting, sweaty mess on his bed, he did feel a bit better. He laid there for a few minutes, catching his breath, thinking about how he was going to be expected to murder some random dude at the drop of a hat. He supposed that first he should demonstrate changing the voltage, altering the amount of electricity flowing through their victim to make it as painful as desired. Maybe lower it down to a slight tingle and then gradually increase it until it's almost enough to kill a person. The standard amperage was enough to mess with the heart if it went on long enough. Between 100 and 200 milliamps, anything could be fatal. He'd need to be careful or it'd be over too soon. He still had to demonstrate the pulsing feature, his own handheld electroshock treatment. If he could manage not to end things prematurely, the only thing left would be to disarm the Stun Gun, give the victim a breather, say something that was possibly cliché, and fire a shot with enough electricity to kill them immediately.
It was a solid strategy, he considered writing a script of some kind so he wasn't stuck trying to think of what to say when he was in the delicate process of torturing some poor unfortunate soul. Whoever it would be.
Flug got out of bed, grabbed some tissues to clean himself up, and went back to his desk and computer. He closed all his tabs and turned it off, he didn't feel much like sitting and staring at a screen anymore. But he did still want to relax. He needed something to distract from his constant self-doubt.
What if he couldn't do it? Not the kidnapping, he wasn't going to argue that he probably wasn't ready for that, the killing. All those things Black Hat said, "I know you won't disappoint me, I have absolute faith in you, there's nothing I look forward to more," Flug didn't want to let him down. Not while they were in a soundproofed murder-dungeon. Flug doubted he could overpower him physically. Black Hat might be able to disarm Flug before he could shoot. Killing people most likely fell under the stuff-you-have-to-do-because-you-sold-your-soul-to-me category. Which wasn't exactly a problem with Flug, but...
He knew nothing about them. He was going to be killing a complete stranger. He's never done that before. Not without it being collateral damage. Everyone else he'd known and had a reason for killing, even if it wasn't exactly a good reason. Gabriel Sueños was an ass who got what he deserved after all that talk of how he and Julio would burn (honestly Flug was proud of the irony). Everyone else was kind of overkill though, Flug would admit that. The five people who'd been investigating the crash were necessary kills, he had to protect himself. Flug was trying to think of this as just practice for Aurelio but...was that enough for him? Did it really count as an act of evil if he had to imagine someone else to be able to go through with it?
He reached for his phone and started scrolling through Aurelio's various social media accounts, lurking around to see what he's been up to since the last time Flug saw him. If he couldn't do anything else, he could put some old habits to good use. There wasn't anything recent, all the latest posts were all from around Christmas time. More accurately right before Christmas, since there weren't any pictures of what presents he got or half-assed seasons greetings. Oh what? Flug thought. Did you get your internet privileges taken away as punishment for getting arrested? He poked around on other people's pages, seeing if Aurelio was tagged in any photos or mentioned by any of his "friends". It didn't look like he was, Flug didn't see him in anyone's group photos from Christmas or New Years. Maybe he was staying home these days, metaphorical tail between his legs.
Flug grinned at the thought, feeling unusually excited by the prospect of Aurelio sitting around and replaying what happened again and again. Feeling his frustration without being able to do anything about it. Flug saw him as kind of a caged tiger now, something that was powerful but wasn't any sort of threat to him. Flug intended on keeping him caged. He wanted Aurelio's last months before he died spent in unpleasantness. Flug wanted to make him feel ten times as afraid as he had when Flug shot him. He wanted to make him feel every bit of fear and hopelessness and pain and suffering Flug had ever felt in his life. He wanted to absolutely break him.
It would be kind of hard to do that and then get away with his murder, though. Maybe Flug could just...drag it out. Assuming they would (eventually) take Aurelio to their little murder-shed thing, they wouldn't be keeping him alive for long. Not too long, at least. How long was it humans could go without water? Three days or so? How about water, but no food? That could give him up to three weeks, wasn't that how it went? A week and a half should be satisfying. Not too long, not too quick. Maybe push it to two weeks if he so wished. Assuming Black Hat had no issues with Flug being a little sadistic. Flug doubted he would. Black Hat would probably want to watch, the freaking psycho. He could even have a turn, as payment for his car, so long as Flug still got the killing blow.
Why did that feel like it would be simple, but the task at hand made him hesitate? If he couldn't do this, how would he get there?
Flug switched over to his email. He didn't check it too often, which he probably should. Hey, he was doing it right now. A step in the right direction. He had a few from his school; reminders about the spring semester, a notice that he was suspended from all extracurriculars concerning engineering. Darn, couldn't go club-hopping. And a notice that he was required to make an appointment with one of the schools mental health counselors by- oh damn he better get on that. The deadline had nearly passed. And they would probably have multiple appointments throughout the semester, that was what this email seemed to suggest. What a pain. He didn't want to talk.
Well, that wasn't exactly true. He did want to talk, but not to Black Hat and not some stranger. He didn't want to shoot himself in the foot by making Black Hat doubt him as well, and he wasn't allowed to talk to "people Black Hat deemed untrustworthy" about the stuff that actually bothered him.
But...maybe he should talk to someone. Even if he had to lie, maybe he did just need to get some stuff off his chest.
Ok, hey, what was this one? It was an email notification from some backwater forum site that he barely remembered using once. Apparently a few people left him some comments on a post he made? What was that about? Flug clicked the link, curious what he'd even wrote in the first place.
It was about him not sleeping. Ah, now he remembered. Back when he hadn't known that being sleepless was a side-effect of being soulless. He read over his original post again, seeing what exactly it was that he had posted for the whole wide web to see. Ugh, it read like a cheesy creepypasta.
I haven't slept for the last few days. All I do is lie awake at night trying to fall asleep but I can't. And I mean DAYS. I thought it was just stress or too much coffee or something at first, but it's been almost a week and I have not fallen asleep once. I'm not even nodding off. I don't even feel tired. Everything else is normal, I might even be more productive than usual. I'm burning through tasks that used to drag on forever. Now the only thing that drags on is the night, because I'm not sleeping. All I do is try and force myself to sleep. Pills don't work. Music doesn't work. Googling the side-effects of going too long without sleep doesn't do anything but freak me out even more. I'm starting to get really worried. The only thing that changed is I went out with this guy into the middle of nowhere and got drunk. That was probably the last time I knocked out. Since then, nothing. Has this happened to anyone else? Can anyone tell me what's going on?
It had gotten four comments. They seemed normal enough. Some random people writing in with, "Go see a doctor dude; That's nothing, I once stayed up three weeks straight on nothing but Monster and Takis; I know how you feel, I never get any sleep either #InsomniacProblems; I swear these Nightmare on Elm Street sequels are just getting worse and worse."
Well, might as well resolve the question.
Hey, me again. I found out what happened to me. I'm fine now. I can't specifically say what happened, but I got my answer. Still haven't slept at all, but now I'm pretty much used to it. I'm taking steps to keep myself safe and sane, so I think I'm going to be okay. I'll definitely see a doctor if something starts going wrong with my health.
There was one question answered. Now he just needed to figure out what he was going to do Saturday. He only had two days left. Was he really ready for random, impersonal murder sessions? He really did wish he had someone else to talk to besides Black Hat, why oh why was he such a loner? He had no one to talk to about his budding villain career path (except his boss, who was out of the question), and no one to talk to about his issues with his and Black Hat's "relationship". Who would even be able to help with that, Black Hat didn't seem to hang out with or talk to anyone but Flug and...Demetra, maybe? Did they talk? They seemed friendly with each other, and Flug supposed it wasn't unthinkable that Black Hat had ONE friend besides him...if they were friends...
You were supposed to be able to confide in your friends, weren't you? About personal, "relationship" stuff?
Translations:
wey = dude (Spanish/Mexican slang)
Bene, bene, = Good, good, (Italian)
Notes:
What do I want? Art of Black Hat in Louboutins! When do I want it? Whenever is convinient, it's no big thing.