Ch. 2 – A New Start

It's uncomfortably warm.

Fickle awareness trickles in and with each heartbeat, waves of pain course through Kaeya's body. He opens his eyes but when the ceiling above begins to spin, he closes them immediately. Either this is the worst hangover he's ever had, or he's ill.

He grimaces, trying to find the strength to move—he can't afford to take a sick day. Jean already has enough on her plate as it is and there is simply too much work for one person to take on (not that Jean would say anything to him, she would happily take on all the work without complaint).

Something tugs at the back of his mind, like he's forgotten something important. It might be that he forgot to take off his eyepatch last night since half of his vision is blocked; he usually removes it before he goes to bed.

Although, something tells him that isn't it. Whatever it is, he'll worry about it later. He's too nauseous and tired to care.

He takes a breath and realizes he's laying down in a soft bed with its blankets tucked around him. His head feels as heavy and numb as the rest of his limbs and sleep threatens to take him away again as he tries to move. Sick, he's definitely sick. He wants to curse but all that comes out is a scratchy groan that makes him wince as pain flares up in the back of his throat.

A large hand suddenly, yet gently, presses itself against his shoulder to keep him still. It startles him so badly that he flinches and his eye shoots open. He hadn't known he wasn't alone, and it only further proves to him that he's sick. Normally, he would have sensed someone else in the room with him.

He tries to focus on the person next to him, but it's difficult to do when his world is still spinning. "It's okay, you're all right. You're safe," a soft, soothing voice says.

It's so, so familiar that he subconsciously relaxes. Shapes and colors are indecipherable in the dark room, and whoever is there moves out of his peripheral view too fast for his sluggish mind to follow. They return as fast as they had gone and place something cool on his forehead that immediately soothes his growing headache.

Kaeya lets out a sigh of relief and exhaustion pulls at him. His eyes start to close themselves and with it, his consciousness begins to slip away.

The person with him smoothes his hair back, pushing sweat-soaked bangs off of his forehead. "Go back to sleep. I'll be here when you wake up, all right?" they say. Their voice sounds far away and what little strength he has left disappears.

He does as he's told.

-x-

When Kaeya wakes up an indeterminable time later, it's to the sunlight pouring into the room from the large window. It hits his face and he winces at the bright lights that pierce through his eyelid. He hears someone walking around and he opens his eyes slowly, testing to make sure the dizziness is gone. Sure enough, the room is sitting still and he blinks a few more times to get rid of the residual blurriness.

He stares up at the ceiling and feels relieved that he knows exactly where he is. Why is he here at the winery? What happened? How did he end up here?

"Oh, you're awake! Wonderful!" The woman's voice yanks him out of his thoughts and Kaeya drags his eye towards the window, where he sees a maid tying off the curtains so they remain open. She turns around and goes to his side, then presses her palm against his forehead gently.

Adeline's touch feels as motherly as ever and she pulls her hand away after a moment and sighs in relief. "Your fever finally broke last night. You had us all so scared," she says.

"Ad—" he starts to say but gets interrupted by a fit of coughs. He winces at the pain in the back of his throat that gets worse with every cough.

She helps him sit up, takes a cup that sits on the nightstand, and raises it to his lips. "Here, drink some water. Slowly now, not all at once."

She tips a bit of water little by little but he grows impatient every time she pulls it away. His mouth feels like it's stuffed with cotton and while the water is helping, he wants more. He reaches up to take the cup with both hands and—

He freezes.

He stares at his hands as an onslaught of memories barrels in at full speed. He remembers the mysterious monster the doctor had seen. Jean telling him to take some knights. Making a promise to Albedo and Klee that he knows he has broken by now.

The Abyss herald.

Kaeya clutches at his reattached arm. He remembers the pain when he'd been struck. He remembers seeing his severed arm laying in the puddle of mud and blood. Now that he feels his arm, he squeezes it yet there's no pain. Under the nightshirt he's wearing, he can't feel any bandages.

He's never heard of any kind of healing that can reattach limbs without an issue. Barbara is one of the best healers he knows, but even she has her limits.

Adeline doesn't notice him do any of this at first, and she pulls the cup away. "There, how do you feel?" she asks. She pauses when he doesn't answer. "Young Master Kaeya? Are you all right?"

Kaeya can't hear her. He keeps staring at his arm with a wide eye and he presses his hand against his chest. There are no bandages there either, and when he pulls the nightshirt up, the scar that should be there isn't. There's smooth skin, and his eye widens as he takes in the rest of himself.

He notices there aren't any scars. Fingers reach up and sneak their way underneath his eyepatch to brush against his covered eye. His skin feels free of burn scars; the ugly, warped skin he has grown to detest isn't there. He pulls his hand back to look at the back of it. The little scar on his hand he'd gotten from an unfortunate training accident with Bennett a few months ago has disappeared as well.

Adeline is saying something to him, worry etched on her face. She gets up when he doesn't respond to her and rushes out the bedroom door, calling for someone.

Kaeya's breath picks up and he looks down at his shaking hands. His memories are overtaking him and he clutches his head when he remembers how he hadn't been able to breathe. His blood had been choking him, and the pain—gods, the pain. Diluc's screams are ringing in his ears and then—

I died.

He goes still and his breath hitches as he comes to this realization. He pulls his hands away from his head and flexes them, finally noticing how small they are. Then he looks at the lower half of his body and sees how the blanket practically engulfs him even though he's sitting up.

Is he a… child?

He shakes his head. That's absurd. No one just turns into a child. He's never heard of a spell that can accomplish that, either. The only other explanation is that he really did die—but if that happened, then he should be six feet under, not waking up at the winery, much less as a kid again.

"Kaeya, you have to breathe."

His head shoots up at the voice. When he sees who it is that's coming to his side, his heart skips a beat. He looks so similar to Diluc—or rather, Diluc looks similar to him. They have the same curly red hair and piercing eyes, but the stubble on the man's face…

"M-Master Crepus?" he mutters. His eye goes wide. He thinks he's forgotten how to breathe.

Master Crepus takes his shoulders and gently squeezes them. It helps ground him and he forces himself to take a short breath when he starts to get dizzy. "It's all right. You're safe now."

Save for the beard, it's uncanny how much Diluc looks like him. Just like Diluc, Master Crepus is tall with broad shoulders, his clothes simple yet presentable should he receive an unexpected guest, and his hair tied into a neat ponytail.

It should be impossible. Ursa the Drake attacked the carriage; he watched Diluc end his life with his own eyes.

What the hell is going on?

Master Crepus should not be walking or talking. He should be buried in the quiet graveyard behind the cathedral that Kaeya visits every year on the day of his death. Maybe this is the afterlife, but if that's the case, why would Adeline be here, too? Last he saw her, she was very much alive and they even had a nice, yet awkward, dinner with the Traveler and Diluc.

His adoptive father sits beside him, causing the mattress to dip a bit from his weight. He is living and breathing, with not a hint of death surrounding him. Kaeya doesn't want to believe this is real. The dead do not come back.

Master Crepus moves slowly and makes a show of putting the back of his hand against Kaeya's forehead, similar to what Adeline had done earlier. "Are you all right? Are you in any pain? Should I call for the Seneschal again?"

His hand is warm against his head. This isn't real. It's not real. This-this is a dream. Fath— Master Crepus is dead.

Kaeya keeps silently staring and tries to force his panic down. It's difficult when the hand feels so real and warm but he has to think. There has to be a reason for this, maybe he's dreaming. This can't be real. He opens his mouth to say something, but only air escapes his lips.

Master Crepus' brows furrow with worry at his silence. "Kaeya?"

He throws all logic out the window.

He doesn't know what's going on, but he finds that he doesn't care. He flings himself into Master Crepus and throws his arms around the man as tightly as he could manage. He's shaking again, but this time it's because he's trying not to cry.

Guilt ravages his mind as he clings to the wine master. He doesn't have the right to cry over Master Crepus, how could he? He lied to the Ragnvindrs for years, but seeing his adoptive father again… All he wants is to hold onto the very much-alive man and never let go.

Master Crepus is startled by his sudden movement, but he smiles and returns his hug. "It's okay, Kaeya," he says. "Everything is all right."

That's all it takes for Kaeya to let out a sob. He clings to him as tightly as he can, as if afraid that he would disappear if he lets go. He wants to apologize for everything he's done, for lying to him and Diluc for years, for not attending his funeral, for fighting Diluc, and for ruining their family.

If Master Crepus is upset that his tears are soaking his shirt, he doesn't say anything about it.

Kaeya cries until his tears dry up and fatigue pulls at his bones. He refuses to give in to his exhaustion and sniffs as he finally pulls away. He wipes his eyes with the back of his wrists. "Sorry…" he mutters.

"You don't have to apologize." Oh, if only he knew what he really means. "Do you feel better?"

Kaeya doesn't answer. He isn't sure if he feels better at all. He feels drained.

After a moment without an answer, Master Crepus worriedly asks, "How is your head? Any pain at all?"

"My… head?" He reaches up to touch his head. His fingers brush against the small lump at the back of his head. It's tender and the sharp pain recedes as he quickly moves his hand away from it. "What happened?"

Master Crepus' brows lower in worry. "You don't remember?"

He shakes his head. "No." He grimaces. There is a dull headache, but it's nothing he can't manage. "I can't remember." Liar.

Master Crepus hums. "Well, according to Diluc, you two were out playing near the lake when you were attacked by a monster. Apparently, you pushed him out of the way of its attack and you were hit in the head."

Kaeya frowns. He can't recall any kind of attack like that in his childhood. He and Diluc played by the water and the grapevines all the time as children; the worst they had ever come across was a cryo slime from the little colony that lived near the waterfall and Diluc had gotten a scratch from one of its sharp spikes. The slimes mysteriously disappeared for years after that, but neither of them complained.

He looks up at Master Crepus again. "How long have I been sleeping?" he asks. His voice chokes up a bit and he fights back another round of coughs.

"Two days. You caught a nasty fever while you were out, but thankfully, Seneschal Seamus came by and helped heal your—"

The door suddenly flies open, startling both of them as it slams into the wall. "Kaeya!"

Kaeya looks at the small redheaded boy as he sprints towards him at full speed. He grunts as his headache flares when he's practically tackled into a hug and falls back down onto the pillows. "Diluc?" he says, bewildered yet again.

He's squeezed tightly and he finds himself hugging back. "I was so scared! You can't ever do that ever again!"

"Master Diluc, please be careful!" Adeline's voice calls from the hallway. She rushes in and bows to Master Crepus. "I'm so sorry, Master Crepus! I mentioned that Master Kaeya was awake and he insisted on seeing him."

"It's all right, Addie. Thank you." Master Crepus nods and Adeline takes that as her queue to leave. She closes the door behind her with a soft click.

Kaeya is finally released when Diluc sits up. Diluc is young, and so, so different from his older counterpart. Baby fat still clings to his cheeks and the innocent sparkle in his eyes is something Kaeya hasn't seen since the day of Master Crepus' death.

The redheaded boy looks guilty when he sees Kaeya wince. "I'm sorry! I didn't hurt your head more, did I?"

"It's not bad…"

Diluc suddenly huffs. "Good, because it's what you get for being so dumb!"

Kaeya winces at the loud yell. Diluc's yelling is not helping his headache. He'd forgotten how loud and boisterous Diluc was as a child. "S-sorry…"

"Diluc, Kaeya is still healing. We need to be quieter right now," Master Crepus tells Diluc. Then he turns his attention back to Kaeya. "Are you hungry? Adeline is making breakfast as we speak."

Truth be told, Kaeya is famished, but his throat burns and he isn't sure if he could handle a heavy breakfast. So he says instead, "I don't know."

"Well, you should eat something. I'll have some soup and medicine brought up for you." He stands up. "Diluc, remember you have training after breakfast."

Diluc nods. "Yes, Father." When Master Crepus leaves, he looks back at Kaeya and his smile falls. Kaeya can't help but think that his frown is still the same as an adult. "Are you sure you're okay? You were hit pretty hard."

"I'm o—" he starts to reply, but coughing interrupts him again and he turns his head away so he doesn't cough all over Diluc. When the coughing fit is over, he swallows and ignores the stinging in his throat. "I'm okay."

The redhead's lips thin unhappily, clearly not believing him. "If you're sure…" He slides off the bed. "Thank you for saving me, but don't do that again! You weren't moving and I thought you were really, really hurt and Father had to carry you inside."

Kaeya frowns as well, trying to recall anything about an attack like that. When nothing comes up, he shakes his head. "Where did the monster go?"

"Oh, the knights took care of it," he answers in a matter-of-fact tone. He smiles and proudly straightens into a salute. "I'm going to a knight soon, too. Then I'll be the one to protect you and Father!"

They both look at the open door when Adeline appears. She's carrying a bed tray with a steaming bowl and another cup of water on it, as well as a small vial filled with a thick, dark liquid. Kaeya tries not to glare at it, he knows what the medicine tastes like and he's always despised it, no matter how well the concoction works. "Breakfast is ready, Young Master Diluc. Your father is waiting for you downstairs."

Diluc nods and then looks back at Kaeya. "I'll come back after I'm done with training!"

Adeline watches him go and then sets the tray above his lap. "Eat the soup first and take all of this when you're done," she instructs and taps the vial. "It'll help your throat and cough, but you'll probably fall asleep after. I'll come back in a few minutes to check on you, all right?"

Kaeya thinks he could fall asleep right now. He nods and satisfied, Adeline leaves the room again, leaving him alone for the first time since he's woken up.

He looks at the broth and his reflection stares back at him. He gingerly touches his cheek, seeing how young his own face is. There isn't a dark bag underneath his eye, and the creases that had started to form on his brow are gone.

He glances at his other hand and pinches it, hoping he'd wake up and realize this is all a dream. Nothing happens. He doesn't wake up in a bed at the cathedral or his bed at his own home, and he isn't waking up from a sleep-deprived nap in his office, either.

He takes a deep breath and starts to eat some of the soup before it gets cold. He eats slowly, swallowing some of the broth and squeezes the spoon in his hand after the first few bites. Adeline's cooking tastes the same as it always does and finishes what he can. The medicine he takes is bitter but the syrup immediately helps soothe his throat while the water he drinks washes out most of the taste. After Adeline comes back and takes the tray away, he sets his head on the pillow and raises his arm to stare at it again.

This is real.

There's no way it isn't. He can't explain why he is a child again or how he is in the past, but he knows he's not dreaming or hallucinating. He lets his arm drop back down and rolls onto his side, facing away from the window.

He'll figure it out later. For now, he closes his eyes and lets sleep claim him.