It just came to my attention that I might want to put trigger warnings in my chapters? This chapter has some accidental alcohol abuse. Just a head's up.
Thanks for the comments, likes, and reviews! Are you guys excited to get the show on the road? Introducing the one, the only, Bilbo Baggins!
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"Has this happened to you? You meet someone unexpectedly, and having no idea how much they'd mean to you in the future. How the path of two strangers crossed, and how it has changed and affected your life so much. And how an accidental clash of worlds, was the most beautiful thing that could possibly ever have happened to you? Well, it has happened to me." - Unknown (But Bilbo Baggins said it once. Maybe.)
~Chapter 5~
The Hobbit
My dirty white sneakers dangle off the edge of the back of the wagon, swinging softly. The wheels kick up a thin cloud of dust from the road and I stare back at the way we've come, snapping a picture before my host can see. We passed Waymoot about two hours ago, and my battery is at 20%. It's going to die tomorrow morning with my power save mode on. Hopefully, I'll be able to take a picture of the party of dwarves before it does.
We've been traveling for four, almost five, hours in the wagon. It took us longer than the initial time Timothy had mentioned due to Daisy being 'slower than she used to be'. And after talking to Timothy for most of it, I fall into a tired silence and he leaves me to my thoughts. The bumps and thumps of the wagon make me want to sleep on the soft hay, but my mind is racing too fast to calm down.
The Shire is beautiful. The trees eventually turned to lush green fields as we went further away from the town of Michel Delving towards the center of the Shire. Large rivers and small streams snake across the earth and we cross plenty of stone and wooden bridges. Hobbit farms dot the landscape, with orchards and wheat fields in between.
I've always lived in a city, surrounded by concrete and glass and plywood my whole life. I do have a few precious moments of driving to the mountains to escape the rush of urban life, and I enjoyed camping with family or traveling with friends. But it was maybe once or twice a year. I watch farms go by, and I see the Hobbits do their thing in such a wholesome atmosphere. Their tasks vary from tending gardens, to hanging laundry, to feeding livestock, to chatting with neighbors. My outfit sticks out like a sore thumb, and the Hobbits stop their chores for just a moment, curious about the bright pink object staring at them from the back of a wagon as we pass by.
The clouds begin to gather, and the sunset is one of the most beautiful I've ever seen as it shines gold and pink through dark purple clouds that are heavy with rain. I look at those clouds in worry. My hoodie isn't waterproof and I don't have an umbrella. The sun eventually goes down, and it's another hour plodding down the dark road with nothing but a lantern until, at last, we see the twinkling lights of candles to signal our arrival at a town. Im immediately reminded of Bilbo's village- the signature hobbit homes are all around me with glowing round windows and doors leading underground.
"Is this Hobbiton?" I ask in awe, hopping down from the wagon and coming over to the front.
"No, Miss Peyton. This is ByWater." Timothy smiles down at me. "My cousin Dango is a pony ferrier here! Been caring for pony and horse hooves for the past decade or so. He is usually at the tavern every night for a pint. Tell him I sent you and he'll point you in the right direction towards Hobbiton. It's about eight miles north. I'd come with ya, but I need to get this hay to my buyers and I'm later than usual." Timothy hesitates, much like Thorin had, at leaving a woman all alone at the edge of town. I already knew that his stop would be a farm much further down the road, "As much as I dislike it, this is where I must leave you now, Miss Peyton. I can't delay or else the rain may ruin my shipment of hay."
"Thank you so much, Timothy. I'll never forget your kindness. I'm actually kinda glad you almost ran me over." I try to joke but I feel my eyes tearing up. I would have arrived here at 3:00 am (or later) if it wasn't for him. Probably get soaked by rain too. From what I estimate, although I could be completely off, it looks like it's only 7 pm after the sunset. It's been a very long day.
Timothy Dunsdo laughs, "Twas nothing, Miss Peyton! Old Daisy here did all of the work. But, I'm a little happy she almost did too, since it was very nice meeting you. And I hope you find the wizard you're looking for!"
I nod and give Daisy a pat while I attempt to joke again, "Thanks, Daisy. I forgive you for trying to kill me."
Daisy says nothing but flicks her tired ears. I nod sympathetically and step back from the wagon.
"Remember! Mention the name Dango Dunsdo at the inn! Good luck to ya!" He snaps the reigns and drives off, glancing at the dark clouds worriedly.
"And to you too!" I call out after him.
I glance up at the sky with a tinge of worry as well. I hope Dango can give me a ride to Hobbiton. I don't want to walk in this weather. I look around me at the small village and walk up to the Inn, observing that it's much smaller than the one in Michel Delving. The door creaks as I open it and I have to squint in the dim lighting. Oil lamps are burning, but they only do so much. I will never take electricity for granted ever again!
The Innkeeper at the desk looks up at me and, like everyone else, his smile turns into shock as he sees my clothing, "Hello Miss? What can I do for ya?"
"Sorry about the clothing, someone sold the fabric to me for super cheap so I'm stuck with it for now. I'm traveling to Hobbiton to see Bilbo Baggins. I was told that a Dango comes here a lot? Dango Dundo?"
After addressing the hot pink elephant in the room he seems to warm up, "Dango Dunsdo, Miss. And he isn't here tonight, I'm afraid. A couple of farms down had an incident with their horse and he was called out."
"Oh no..." I deflate a tiny bit, "Is there a way to get to Hobbiton tonight? I'm on my way to a very important meeting and I can't be late."
"I'm afraid that due to the coming rain, no wagons are headed up that way. Tomorrow morning would be a better time to set out. It's about eight miles from here."
I feel antsy. I can't stay the night, what if I miss the meeting?! Am I willing to walk eight miles through the rain to show up uninvited to a secret dwarf meeting? Yes. I am. I'll set off after dinner, I decide.
"Um, I don't have any money on me. But if I can get some food, I will be sure that Bilbo Baggins pays you back." I feel bad for lying, but I really will beg Bilbo to pay them back after his Quest for Erebor. He'll have a whole chest full of gold, so it should be fine.
The innkeeper immediately looks suspicious, "I don't accept credit, Miss. Not from strangers."
I pale. Not good.
"What about Timothy Dunsdo? Do you know him? He could vouch for me." I feel a little bad for taking advantage of Timothy like this. But, beggars can't be choosers.
The innkeeper is reluctant but slowly nods. "I can accept credit from him. How do I know what you say is true?"
"He and his pony Daisy just dropped me off. They have to deliver a wagon of hay to a farm down between ByWater and Three Farthing Stone. He has a wife and two little girls, Bea and Daph. His brother is the pony Ferrier here, and I was told to come in to meet him."
The innkeeper smiles warmly at me after that, accepting the validity of my words, "I can set you up with a room tonight, Miss. Dango may be here tomorrow night at the tavern."
I shake my head, smiling, "No room is necessary. I need to get to Hobbiton tonight. Some food would be wonderful though!"
"I...I wouldn't reccomend it miss. The roads will be terribly muddy. You'll arrive in an awful state, you will."
An image of a huge mud monster showing up on Bilbo's front door comes to my mind and I feel a little sick at the thought of the company seeing me like that. First impressions are important, but what choice do I have?
"I'll think about it." I say in a quiet, timid voice.
"Very good, Miss. Go on in, then. Help yourself." He gestures to behind him and I walk further into the inn back to where the pub...or tavern?...is located. Not sure what the difference is.
I immediately go to the bartender, feeling very thirsty, "Uh, good evening. Do you have any milk?"
The hobbit bartender gives my clothing a critical eye and shakes his head with a frown, "Not tonight, miss. Ol' Daisy's been having a go of it I'm afraid. But we have ale. Here ya go."
Daisy again? Does everyone name their farm animals 'Daisy' in the Shire? Must be a common name like Spot, Fifi, or Rover.
He clunks a wooden tankard in front of me on the table. I lean in hesitantly to smell it only to shrink back with a grimace. It smells like…like…fermented something.
"Do you, uh, have anything less…gross?" I try.
"No." He deadpans.
"Ok." I murmur quietly with a blush, not wanting to make any waves. The bartender turns to other people at the counter and I reach out to sip at the tankard.
1 hour later
"I mean, everything I ever thought I knew about how physics and how the universe works is a complete lie. How do I know what is real and what's fake anymore? I'm gunna be honest *hiccup!* you're a great person to talk to." I smile happily at the bartender.
He doesn't respond as I continue.
"Why couldn't I uv been transported to a world that's pretty much MY world, You know? *hiccup!* Like…like Harry Potter or something? I would just move over to the United States while they had their wizard-y war in England. I'd be a muggle anyways so it's not like I could join in the fight or anything *hiccup!*." I take another long drink of my ale.
"Miss, I think you should stop drinking and go home." He says nervously while cleaning a glass. He looks a little blurry though, so I can't really see his face to tell if he's actually nervous or not.
"Pssh!" My arms feel heavy. "That's wha I've talking ta tell you! I can't go home! I live in ANOTHER world!" I flop my arms around me and some of my ale spills. Aw, dang it! I was gonna drink that. "Besides, this stuff isn't so bad once you get past the initial smell. It almost has a butterscotch yummy kinda flavor!" I peer one eye into the cup to study the fizzy liquid a bit closer.
"It's fermented barely, miss. And I think you've had quite enough."
He tries to take it from me and I gasp in anger, "Hey! Hands off, Nigel!"
"My name is Togo." He frowns back at me.
"Whatever! Go get your own drink. Leave mine alone!" I hold it close to my chest.
"Eh, leave her Togo. She's completely rat-arsed!" A hobbit on the stool to my left laughs.
I didn't realize I had an audience. I look at him and realize that the entire inn has been listening to me ramble on about my tale of woe.
"Hmph!" I blush and try and cover it with my tankard of ale. "Rat-arsed? My butt doesn't look like a rat."
The tavern explodes in laughter.
I stare at them in surprise and then glare. What are they laughing at?
"So, what's this land of yours called eh?" He asks me cockily, leaning his pudgy hobbit belly against the side and gives me a mocking smile. Most hobbits here are a little pudgy I think to myself, noticing his double chin.
"Earth." I sniff.
He laughs harder, "That's hilarious! And so unimaginative. Just take the 'Middle' out and it's Earth!"
"Well, why's it called 'Middle Earth' anyways, huh?" I question back at him. "What's it in the middle of? Nothing! So shut it!"
"It's called Middle Earth because it's the continent that is in the middle of two seas, the Balegaer Sea and the East Sea." A hobbit speaks up from another table. He has glasses on so he must be educated. I think.
I blink at him, "Two seas? Wouldn't it just be one sea that wraps around the whole earth? I mean the whole Middle Earth?"
He gives me a weird look, "That would only make sense if Middle Earth was the only continent on the planet."
My mouth drops open, "Woooooaaaaaht? You mean there are MORE continents on Middle Earth than just Middle Earth?!"
"No? Middle Earth is just one of the continents on the planet Arda?" The hobbit says confused, and then rolls his eyes and chuckles, "I get it. You're obviously joking. Can't believe I'm trying to reason with a drunk human."
A few of the hobbits around the pub start snorting in laughter.
"Drunk? I'm not drunk! I've never been drunk in my life." I angrily put my hands on my hips, only to start swaying dangerously and I reach out to grab the table quickly to stabilize myself. Why are the walls moving? "So then….this world is called Arda? But I thought that this world was called Middle Earth?"
More laughter.
It makes me so mad that they're laughing at ME when THEY'RE the ones who have no business existing. They're all just a bunch of fictional characters in a storybook! Wait…they aren't even in the Hobbit story, are they? I try and narrow my eyes to make them stop getting blurry so I can see if I recognize them…
The hobbit next to me laughs along with a couple of other hobbits besides him. "Wait, wait, wait…You mean this whole time you were trying to tell us that you aren't just from another land called Earth on Arda….but you're from a whole other WORLD called Earth!?"
"Yes! That's what I've been saying this whole time!" I nod my head, only to realize it's a bad idea since I'm starting to see two of every hobbit. I hold my head still to keep them from multiplying. It doesn't help. "So wait…Middle Earth is a continent? And…Arda is the world? So, what are other continents called?"
The scholarly hobbit spoke up, "We're not entirely sure. People who travel across the sea don't normally return. But a few have, and we have maps of the other lands, but they aren't very detailed."
"Hmph. Where's Columbus when you need him?" I mumble into my ale only to realize it's all gone. Why is the ale always gone? This is kinda freaky, almost like I'm living in the book 'Horton Hears a Who' or something. My mind sort of explodes with that knowledge. I stare at my empty tankard with wide eyes, "Who's to say I'm not on a snowflake right now?"
"She fell into that ditch and done lost her mind!" Everyone in the pub is laughing now, even the barkeeper.
I glare at them. "Did not! 'The Hobbit' never said that the world was called Arda!"
"Yeah he did!" Another hobbit scoffed "Just now!"
"No, I don't mean THAT hobbit," I point to the hobbit with glasses. Oh wait, wrong hobbit. I point to the correct one, "I mean the book called 'the Hobbit'! They never mention that in the book!"
"She's loonier than a bunch of rocks!"
They keep laughing.
I feel so angry! All these fantasy hobbits laughing at me for just stating simple facts? I'm going to smack them back into the storybook from whence they came!
"I'll show you!" I stand up, with the intent to punch the hobbit next to me into the next continent, only to find that my legs decided to fall asleep and my balance went on vacation. I fall into a heap on the floor and proceed to glare at all the hobbits laughing around me.
"Alright, that's enough lads. Poor thing can't handle her ale. Florence, give her a hand up will ya?" I hear the barkeeper say, but I can't see him from my position on the floor.
"C'mon Miss. I'll help you to your room." I can barely hear a voice murmur next to me in the cacophony of everyone laughing.
I turn to see it's the scholarly hobbit with glasses from earlier. He put my arm around his neck and lifts the two of us off the floor. I wobble and glare at my legs for acting so strange while we ignore the laughter around us and walk towards the stairs.
"You're a nice hobbit. Even though you shouldn't be real." I smile at him gratefully.
He scoffs and rolls his eyes, "You don't hold your ale very well. How many was that?"
"Three." I wheeze as we climb the stairs. I feel like I'm gonna throw up.
"I counted five. Lay down. I have haglass grass that will help you'll feel better. Eat this tomorrow when you wake up." He leaves a small yellow flower on the table next to my bed.
I snort, "You want me to eat a flower? What, are you nuts?" I start giggling at my own joke.
"Yes, it should completely get rid of your headache. It's grown in the blue mountains and the dwarves use it after drinking competitions. We use it in the Shire for pain."
"Oh! So the flower is like an ibuprofen?"
He doesn't answer me, but I don't really care as I drift off to sleep with a snore.
The next morning I feel like I'm about to die. I've never had a hangover before, always considered the boring one who studied instead of partied. My roommate would come home hammered though, so that always reaffirmed my desire to not drink after watching her behavior and smelling her as she stumbled into our dorm room.
And now?
Now my eyelids feel like they have 2lb weights attached to each eyelid as I gaze around the strange room. I don't remember coming here. My mouth feels dry and my head is hammering. A yellow flower catches my attention out the corner of my eyes and I turn my bleery gaze to it. The five petaled flower sits on my bedside table and for some weird reason I feel the need to eat it. I pick it up and try to focus on it before throwing it in my mouth and start to chew the petals. Ugh! I spit it out immediately, the residue from the flower petals coating my tongue. Why did I think that would work? Ugh, I'm going back to sleep...
An hour later and I'm frantically running out the inn doors with two blueberry muffins, one in each hand.
I slept in! I can't believe I slept in! I never did meet that Dango fella, but there's nothing I can do about it. I have to get to Bilbo's house!
The flower did it's trick, and my memory of the embarrassing night came back to me as my headache and symptoms miraculously disappeared. Apparently I'm one of those belligerent drunks that try to start fights with people. I shake my head in humiliation. Never again, Peyton. Never again!
One minute later and I can't run anymore, huffing and puffing like the Little Engine Who Could. It takes me two and a half hours to get to Hobbiton. And the roads are VERY muddy so I mostly walk on the green grass beside the road to avoid it.
The whole world smells fresh though.
Blue sky, puffy white clouds, butterflies frolicking to and fro all around. I think I've found my Nirvana…sans mountains, of course.
I finally get to Hobbiton and check in at the Green Dragon Inn for directions, only to get the horrible news that Bag End is on the north end of town and it is about two miles away! By now the sun has risen enough that things are warming up a bit, and I'm able to walk along the dirt road, kicking a stray rock or two with my sneakers in annoyance. Why couldn't Bilbo Baggins live in town like a normal person?
Still though, I breathe in the earthy smell of gardens and crops and the greenery fills my soul a little. Mankind wasn't meant to live in a city, I realize. This is where we belong; among nature. Amongst the grass and trees and flowers and bees and air. No wonder so many of us struggle with depression and suicide nowadays. We've forgotten our roots, and our souls have shriveled up. Out here, I feel bigger than ever before. As if my spirit has expanded inside my chest. I humm the tune to 'Oh What a Beautiful Morning' from the musical Oklahoma as I pass the hobbit homes or smiles? Smeeals? Smials? I think that's what they're called. Someone mentioned it at the bar.
I'm so preoccupied with my thoughts that it takes a small rock almost tripping me to get me to pay attention. And then…. I see it.
At the top of the hill, lies a green round door. A door that started Tolkien's whole story. My breath whooshes out of me as my heart leaps in my chest. I stare at it in awe, which slowly turns to reverence. Freshly painted deep green with a glossy brass knob in the center, surrounded by beautiful flowers, surrounded by lush green fields. I feel a sharp tingle in my eyes and throat.
This is the door that sparked the imaginations of millions of people in my world! This is the door that opened wide and allowed all of us dreamers to go on an adventure that we never imagined possible…and I am seeing it! In the flesh!
It's like…..being told Santa Clause is real your whole life, (never actually believing in him, of course, because….well, you know…science?) and seeing movies and reading books about him, and then POOF! You're at the North Pole and he's standing in front of you laughing with jolly!
It feels as if I have stumbled upon something sacred.
Should I kneel? Should I sing a song? Should I burn incense? Should I write a poem? Paint a pic-
I gasp as I remember that I have my cellphone. I keep forgetting!
I quickly pull my cell phone out, my fingers fumbling in my haste to get it out and mark this momentous occasion. I miraculously have 3% on my battery from keeping it on the low battery setting as often as possible and I press the camera shutter button as quickly as I can. Multiple times.
There. The image is taken. The Hobbit's door is on my cellphone.
I bounce on my heels with glee. No one is going to believe this, even with a photo! But it'll be nice to look at it when Gandalf gets me back home. It'll be good evidence for me when my memory fades and I begin to doubt if I even experienced any of this. I better hurry and get a picture of Bilbo too for posterity's sake.
I run up the stone steps two at a time to Bilbo's door and my breaths are coming in gasps and I think tears are coming to my eyes. And I feel faint, and giddy, and nauseous, and I feel like I could die in this moment and be completely ok with such a thing happening to me. Just bury me across the road so my grave is facing towards this beautiful hobbit door! That would be a horrible view for Bilbo though…I giggle, feeling a bit crazy. Maybe I am?
I reach my hand up, slowly, savoring the moment, and rap my knuckle against the painted wood.
I stand back and suddenly worry about my appearance. I quickly smooth my wayward hair, hoping that no flyaway hairs are sticking up out of my ponytail. I swipe at my shirt and pants to make sure I don't have any stray dirt. I do. There's a lot of it.
I bounce on my feet as I wait…and wait….
I frown a little. Maybe I didn't knock hard enough? I knock again, making sure I tap my knuckles with a little more force. It's a very sturdy door and it causes my knuckles to sting from the force of it.
I gaze at the door affectionately. Of course it's sturdy! A door that inspires such creativity and magic must be sturdy.
Another minute passes by and nothing. And then suddenly, it hits me like a truck.
He's gone.
"No!" I gasp aloud in terror.
No, no, no! Did I really...? I missed the quest?! Thorin Oakenshield was traveling to Bree, but he must have stopped on his way here and met up with Gandalf, Bilbo, and the other dwarves last night while I was getting drunk in a tavern! Oh no.
Panic fills my heart and I start pounding on the door frantically, hoping that I'm wrong and he's just taking a nap or fixing a meal or using the restroom.
I notice a bell to the side of the door and I start yanking on the string, frantically, "Bilbo! Bilbo! Are you there?!" I yell loudly, at the crack in the door, hoping that a little hobbit will open the door and say, 'What is all this pounding and ringing and shouting about, madam?! It is a bit much!' But no such luck.
"Bilbo?! BILBO?! GANDALF!?!"
Not a sound.
All my happiness and joy from this morning's walk spiral into a black pit of despair and paralyzing fear. I put my hand and head on the door and slide down the smooth paint with great big gasps that turn into mournful sobs as I lean back and sit there, gazing up at the green door. I'm too late…too late…. How will I ever get home now?
I start to sob very hard and very loud and rest my forehead against the door in heart-wrenching agony. I'm so angry! Why did this happen to me?! What did I do to deserve this?
Now I'm going to have to wait until Bilbo and Gandalf come back from their trip to reclaim Erebor! I don't know where I will live, or how I'm going to make ends meet. How long does their quest even take? I never could quite figure that out. It could be a whole year before he gets back! Six months there and six months back, right? Or is it longer?
I wail even harder, sitting there in abject misery and I cover my face in my hands to hide my anguish. I feel like my heart is going to tear apart from the hopeless fear that fills every inch of my-
"Uhhh, excuse me? Oh! Uhh...um, Miss? Miss? Whatever is the matter, Miss?"
I look up from my snot-filled hands to see the most beautiful sight in the whole world of Arda.
Bilbo Baggins himself stands behind me on the steps up to his door with a wicker basket full of food, obviously having just come from the market. At least I think it's him?
All these hobbits have begun to look the same to me with curly sandy hair and hobbit clothes and big hairy feet. But he has a very 'Bilbo-y' feel to him.
My red puffy eyes widen, "OH! Oh my gosh! It's YOU! At least, I think it's you? Bilbo Baggins, yes? I…I thought you were gone!" I wipe the tears and boogers away with my sleeve.
"Oh! Don't- Uh, please, allow me…" Bilbo, who was watching me explain myself with a terrified expression, quickly puts the food basket he's carrying down in a rush and pulls out a white handkerchief and hands it to me. I stare at it, shocked for a second. I then reach out and take it from his hand and I can't help the smile that comes to my face as I look at it. Ah yes, the handkerchief he forgets. His stammering pulls my wide eyes back up to him, "And, uh, yes! Yes, I was gone, but now I'm back…again? Uh. Just popped by the market for some ingredients for my um, my dinner tonight?" His voice turns up as a question as he clearly is wondering why I'm here.
"Oh," I say, feeling relieved.
"I'm sorry, uh, have we met?" He asks, trying to be very polite in his 'Bilbo Baggins' way. Both he and I know that we've never met before, but it seems to be the only cordial thing he could think to say.
Translation: Who the hell are you and what are you doing on my front porch?
I can clearly see that he is quite befuddled to have come home to find a human woman crying at his front door, asking if he's Bilbo Baggins.
My eyes widen, "Oh my gosh, I am SO sorry!" I quickly get to my feet, mortified beyond belief. "This was not how I planned our first meeting to go. I understand you must be confused to find a stranger crying at your doorstep!" I giggle a little in embarrassment.
Bilbo smiles and nods as I speak, my good manners putting him more at ease, and I continue, "My name is Peyton Silva, and I am looking for Gandalf. He is coming over for dinner tonight, isn't he?"
At my explanation, Bilbo looks confused. "Gandalf? Uh… no, there isn't any Gandalf coming to my home for dinner that I am aware of. Gan-DALF? GAN-dalf?" He mutters the name to himself, trying to place it.
I feel like I'm going to be sick… Why is he acting like he doesn't know Gandalf?! Gandalf is one of his best friends!
"You DO know Gandalf, don't you?!" I squeak, feeling like I entered the twilight zone. He must be joking. Did I travel to an alternate reality of The Hobbit? Is there no Gandalf in this version? Impossible. Gandalf is an ESSENTIAL character in Bilbo's life and in Frodo's!
"Oh!" He snaps his fingers, his eyes lighting up as if it just came to him and I breathe out, relieved. "You wouldn't mean Gandalf the Wandering Wizard that makes such amazing fireworks, would you?" He asks excitedly.
My smile slowly drops.
"Yeeeeeeeeeees?" I say slowly. What on earth….I mean, what on Middle Earth is going on here?
"I haven't seen him in years. Decades, even." Bilbo shrugs, "Not since I was a young boy. He was a friend of my late mother's. He certainly doesn't live in these parts." He peers at me more closely, "What is a human woman doing here at MY home, looking for a wizard?"
"Uhh, I need his help," I say bewildered, my mind racing.
I have to think really hard. Thorin is alive, traveling to Bree. Probably already made it there or will tomorrow night since it's a four-day trip. Bilbo hasn't seen Gandalf since he was young….which means that Thorin doesn't know of the quest either...which means that not only am I NOT too late for them to go on the quest…..
I gulp.
It means I'm early.
But HOW early is the question. Extremely early? Or just a little early? I could be days, months, or years early! I thought Thorin was traveling on his way to the quest! But he wasn't? He really was just going to Bree? Why was he going to Bree of all places?
This isn't good. But still...
I look calculatingly at Bilbo who is still looking at me with a concerned expression, his groceries sitting on the steps by his hairy feet.
...it isn't as bad as him already being gone. Better fifteen minutes early than five minutes late, my dad always says. So, I should be grateful. All that's left now is to not let Bilbo out of my sight until I have some idea of when Gandalf is coming.
I turn my charm up to a level 10 and put on my best smile with a professional voice, "Forgive me, I'm sure you have questions. I hate to intrude upon your hospitality, but I have traveled from Michel Delving to see you. Might I help you with your groceries and we can sit and talk? I will tell you everything."
Bilbo's eyes widen, but he thankfully stays true to character and hastily invites me inside to my immense relief, "Oh! Certainly, certainly. Please, do come in." He picks up his basket and steps by me and I step to the side to allow him easier access to his door. He twists the knob, and it opens up to a beautifully furnished home with gleaming wooden floors.
I thank him and enter, glad to know that if he had been gone, the door hadn't even been locked and I could have squatted here for the year or more that he was traveling to the Lonely Mountain. There would have been no food in the pantry, though.
I look around me in awe. It's just like the Lord of the Rings movie! I turn to him, "Oh! Bilbo, I'm so sorry- Let me help you with your groceries!"
Bilbo smiles and shakes his head as he says, "Oh, that's quite alright. Miss Silva, yes? I think I can manage. I thank you for the offer though."
He closes the door behind us and patters in the direction that I can only imagine is the kitchen. I follow after him, glancing around me at the décor as I do so. This hobbit hole is HUGE. A lot bigger than I thought it would be. Or maybe I'm just short?
Beautiful beams of polished wood hold up the structure of the hobbit hole. To the left is a large room, which we walk through, with a cozy fireplace surrounded by red bricks and a table covered in writing utensils and books and paper. I see a few maps and I instinctively come closer to get a better look.
"Ahh, this way, if you please." He says nervously when I pause to look at the papers.
"Right, sorry." I walk with him into the next room, which is the kitchen. He must think me impossibly rude. Not as rude as the dwarves will be though…
I follow him into a lovely kitchen that reminds me of the 1800s before electricity. There are dried flowers and herbs hanging from the ceiling, as well as barrels and baskets of easy-to-store foods such as apples, potatoes, and onions. Through the kitchen door I see another door across the hallway full of food. Must be his pantry.
One thing's for certain, Bilbo is not poor.
"Wow. Are all hobbit holes as grand as yours?" I ask, amazed at how different it is in person. I hardly saw anything in the movies, maybe 10% of all of this. It's incredible!
Bilbo beams at the compliment and then attempts to brush it off in a humble but also pleased way, "Oh, I wouldn't say it's THAT grand….but this smial was created by my father, Bungo, as a wedding gift to my mother, Belladonna. Once, it was only an entrance and one room. But it continued to be added on over the years until my parents passed it on to me. I don't have a family, so I haven't added any more rooms." He then indicates to some fancy teacups and saucers next to a very beautiful teapot like the ones I had seen in Michel Delving, "Can I interest you in some tea?"
"Oh! Yes please!" I grin, feeling excited to use one of the teacups. I haven't had a tea party since I was a little girl. This all feels so Alice in Wonderland-y, except I'm in Middle Earth.
He places a cup of tea on a saucer in front of me and pours one of his own on the table at his side.
"Now then…" Bilbo finally says, sitting down and looking at me, "How can I be of service, Miss Silva?" A friendly smile is on his face but his hazel eyes are full of anxiety as he surely wonders what great trouble brought a strangely dressed human woman to his door, seeking a wizard of all things.
I stare at the curling steam rising out of the tea as I wonder what I can tell him.
Until now, the thought of changing the future never even crossed my mind. Do I even care if I change the future in Middle Earth?
Not really.
I mean…do I want anything bad to happen to anyone? Of course not. But where does my responsibility begin or end in regard to another world's future, anyways? I don't have nor did I ever want that responsibility, and fate will have to figure itself out because it landed me here and that sounds like someone else's problem.
Still. As someone studying to be a nurse, the phrase 'Do no harm' comes to mind. I decide I will just talk about me and my problems and try to leave his future out of it.
"I am from a different world and I need Gandalf in order to return there."
Bilbo Baggin's mouth drops open and his eyes widen. I grimace and nod in understanding at his reaction. Out of everything I could have said, Bilbo was surely not expecting THAT. Maybe I should have eased into it a bit.
I sigh and speak before he can, "I know. I believed this whole situation was impossible myself a few days ago, but it's true. I am not from Middle Earth. I am a woman of science and reason, but I woke up in a strange ditch in a field two days ago with a single gold coin as the only variable that may or may not explain how I arrived." I pull out the gold coin and place it on the tea tray for him to see, "Ever since then I haven't really been myself, and I apologize for sobbing on your front door. I need Gandalf because he's…fairly knowledgeable about, uh, higher… power stuff?"
I'm not sure if Gandalf is knowledgeable about inter-dimension travel, but he may know of people who are. If not Gandalf, then perhaps Elrond would know. If not Elrond, then perhaps Galadriel? If not Galadriel, my last bet would be to ask Sauroman but he's as likely to kill me as to help me, so hopefully Galadriel has some advice. And Sauron is simply out of the question.
"I…I don't suppose you would know how to find him…would you?" I continue, hesitantly.
Bilbo shakes his head, "I know not where he lives. Wizards are peculiar in that they come and go as the wind."
"Ain't that the truth," I mutter and sip at my tea. Gandalf will always be popping in and out of the company on their quest. I sigh, there really is nothing for it, "I hate to ask this Mister Baggins, sir…But would it be too much trouble for me to stay until he arrives?"
Bilbo stares at me in shock, "How can you be so sure he is coming here? To my home?" he asks.
I grimace. While I don't care too much about changing the future at the moment….How do you tell someone that their future is all written down in a fairytale? That their whole world shouldn't exist? The best case scenario is that he wouldn't believe me, while the worst case is that he will have an existential crisis and question everything he knows about the universe and himself. I mean….if I was suddenly told by someone who came from another world that we all just live inside a speck of dust like 'Horton Hears a Who'… my brain would probably explode. Or I'd go rob a bank because nothing really matters anymore.
I take a deep breath, "Because, I know the future." There. That should work.
"You know the future?" He repeats, raising a dubious eyebrow.
"Yup." I pop the 'p' and take a sip of tea, trying to appear nonchalant.
"That's not possible. What am I going to do in the next five minutes?" He questions, accusingly.
I can't help but my roll my eyes and huff, "I don't know, Bilbo! I only know of things that will influence all of Middle Earth's future."
Bilbo is silent for a moment and then asks skeptically, "Gandalf…coming to my home, will influence all of Middle Earth's future?"
I make a clicking sound and shoot him with my finger, which is probably odd to him because they don't have guns in Middle Earth, "Correct. But, more importantly, it will influence MY future, since I really need to be getting back home before my roommate reports me as missing and my family worries. I won't be joining the que-…uh, I mean… I won't be staying long. Soooo, I guess that brings me back to my original question." my gaze turns more sincere, "May I please wait here until he arrives?"
"Well, I-I...I really don't think…" Bilbo fidgets in his seat. "While you are quite pleasant and amiable, I…I don't really know you or even necessarily believe your story, Miss Silva. Sure, you are dressed in very peculiar clothes…but a human girl from another world coming to MY home? Surely you can see the whole thing is rather…uh, I beg your deepest pardon for saying this, but…it's all rather incredible!"
Translation: You're out of your G*-D*mn mind!
"Ok, first off I'm a human woman, not a girl. I'm just really short. And secondly, I really AM from another world!" I try to sound strong and confident but my voice turns a bit whiny towards the end. He's just got to believe me!
"What evidence do you have of this claim?" Bilbo asks, at least allowing me a chance.
"I have this." I pull out my cell phone; the only thing I have from my world.
Bilbo's eyes widen at the device in my hands in disbelief. "What is that?"
I smile, understanding Thorin's reaction much better now, "It's a communication device from my world. It allows us to talk with people over long distances. Over entire continents, actually. It's almost dead though." I turn it on and his mouth drops open as the screen lights up. "It also allows us to document events with photos or video and a whole bunch of other things. Here's a photo of your door."
I click to my pictures and it shows Bilbo's green door. Bilbo literally flinches back from my phone in shock before leaning in closer despite himself. "It..it looks so real! Like I could just reach out and touch my door…!"
I swipe it and Bilbo is mind-blown to see images of the Shire and Hobbits that I took while they weren't looking. I even went past that and showed him pictures of me and my friends doing various activities at the university campus. After a funny video of my sister and I laughing while we were driving to a lunch date, my phone drops to 1% and I grimace.
"Here, let me get a photo of us before my phone dies."
Bilbo looks more shocked, "Why will it die? Is it sick?"
"It's not alive. But it runs on energy to work. Your world doesn't have the energy it needs." I turn the selfie mode on and quickly snap a photo of me smiling and Bilbo staring at the phone in amazement.
"It is like…a mirror image of myself." He whispers, eyes wide and spooked.
"Don't worry, it won't hurt you." I try to console him, remembering that the Native Americans had the same reaction to photographs when they first came out. Some sort of fear that it would trap their souls or something. "Think of it like a mirror reflecting your image and then the, uh…the energy?…preserves the image." I realize that I never understood how cameras work. Something to do with light?
My phone freezes, turns black...and then it dies. I stare at it in my hand for a moment, seeing my reflection in the dark glass screen. My only connection to my world is suddenly gone. Just like that.
I look back up at Bilbo and I can tell that he sees my fear.
"If…If you don't return to your world...will you die from a lack of energy too?" Bilbo asks, concerned.
I smile and shake my head, relieved that he seems to finally believe me and my outlandish story.
"No, it's not alive Bilbo. Perhaps 'dead' isn't the right expression? I mean that it's uncharged…or, uh, it's out of energy, and it just needs a couple of hours connected to the energy source before it'll work again. It's just a temporary thing. It can still work again."
"Fascinating…" Bilbo's brain processes the implications of such a device.
I sigh. We're getting off-topic, "I promise that I won't be much trouble!" I plead, jumping back to my original question with no finesse. "I'll hopefully only need a place to stay for one week before he arrives. Two weeks at most! I will keep the house clean and I will make it so you don't even notice that I'm here. I'll be as quiet as a mouse!"
"I have a house cleaner." He waves off my bid for servitude, lost in thought. After a moment he slowly speaks out loud, "You are, indeed, from another world... as incredible as that sounds! And yet... you have come to ME for help. How did you know of me?" He looks up at me curiously.
Ugh. Of COURSE it would eventually lead to this. I decide to be honest, "Bilbo, I have two options here… I could just say YOLO and tell you literally everything about everything and potentially ruin the future happiness of everyone and everything...or I could tell you that you're quite famous in my world and leave it at that. Your pick." I lean back into the chair and wait for his response. Whoever decided to bring me to this world is responsible for the mess I make. I don't accept any responsibility for the ruined lives in this world. If Bilbo asks, I will tell him what he wants to know. I'm THAT desperate for a place to stay, even if the future is ruined. I've got to get home.
"I…I will just take your word for it." Bilbo finally nods, looking disappointed and resigned.
"Wise choice, buddy." I wink at him and shoot him with my finger again. I don't admit it out loud but Bilbo has kinda surprised me. I thought he would for sure jump at knowing the future, consequences be damned. Most people would. And it really didn't take too much to convince him. It would have taken a lot more than some fancy technology to convince me that someone is from the future.
I sigh and hang my head deeply, "I just…need to figure out how to find Gandalf. Or perhaps even go to Rivendell and get help from the elves if he doesn't show up."
Surely, spiritual beings such as elves would know how to send people between worlds. Right?
Apparently, that is the right thing to say because Bilbo immediately perks up. "Rivendell? The home of the elves?" He asks excitedly.
"Yes! Have you heard of it?" I know he has.
Bilbo's whole face transforms. "Of course! I've always dreamed of traveling to Rivendell! I used to look for elves in the forest! I once saw them, you know! It was a procession of them! It always sounded like such an adven-" he stops himself, as if suddenly remembering who he is supposed to be, and looks sheepish.
"Like what, Bilbo? Like….an adventure?" I grin encouragingly at him, "I quite agree."
"Well…anyways," Bilbo mumbles, sounding a bit chagrined as he rubs his hands on his knees, before suddenly standing up to clear the table, "No self-respecting Hobbit would ever bother with such things as adventures."
He's not exactly like the cartoon, I ponder as I study his movements. He's much more fidgety and jumpy and unsure. So afraid of causing offense with his words. And yet…so eager and full of a hidden fire. By the time he comes back from his quest, I'm willing to bet his movements will be sure and his bearing confident. He won't take crap from anybody.
"Well," I lean back into the cushioned comfort of the chair and hold my cup of warm tea to my lips to hide my smile, "I predict there's a lot of surprises in store for you, Bilbo Baggins."
He looks at me questioningly and a bit suspiciously. My smile slips from my face and the feeling of hopelessness returns. I force myself to set my empty cup down. Bilbo is a wonderful hobbit, but he's right….It was foolish of me to put my whole hope in him to help me, a stranger who showed up at his door. And I am not dwarfish enough to force my presence on someone who is clearly uncomfortable with me there. A feeling of dread fills my heart. How will I eat? Where will I sleep?
I stand up, not meeting his eyes, and brush my clothes off as I try to be brave and not cry, "I'm sorry for intruding on your time. You have a lovely home, and I thank you for the tea. I just…" my throat closes up and I stare at the floor, not wanting him to see my watery tears. I've walked so far and traveled so long to find him.
"I just don't know what to do." I whisper. My body doesn't listen to me, as much as I try to control it, and I have to cover my face with my hands. My shoulders shake as I begin to cry again without being able to stop myself and I sit back down on the chair.
Ugh. And I was doing so well at holding it in, too.
Honestly, I'm not trying to be manipulative. I'm not a crier. But I feel like that has been the story of my life for the past few days. A rollercoaster of wonder and awe that zooms down to fear and tears, only to go back up to wonder and awe once more. It's so exhausting.
Bilbo's reaction is immediate.
"Oh..oh my dear…please, don't cry."
I see him fluttering the white handkerchief at the corner of my hands, indicating for me to take it once again. I do so, wiping at my cheeks and careful not to use the parts I used on my nose before.
"Do you have a tent I could borrow? And…and some old blankets? I'll need to stay in Hobbiton until Gandalf arrives, and if I can't stay with you, I'm sure no other hobbit would allow me to either."
"You may stay with me until this Gandalf fellow shows up."
I look up at him, shocked, yet hopeful again. "Really?"
He nods resignedly, "I can't turn away someone like you in need or allow you to sleep alone in a tent. It's barely turning to spring, and the nights haven't warmed yet. Besides that, it isn't proper for a lady such as yourself to sleep alone in a field or forest unchaperoned. Not that the Shire is unsafe, but you have no family, or friends in this world and…and somehow you know me." Bilbo shakes his head in amazement, "Me! Of all people! So…you have my permission to stay. And if Gandalf the wizard does not show up as you believe, I may be able to…lend you some supplies to get to Rivendell."
"Bilbo Baggins... you are the most amazing, wonderful hobbit in all the world of Arda!" I jump up from my chair and give him a huge enormous hug.
"Oh! Why, um, why thank you!" Bilbo's face is a deep red once I finally release him, "And you are, uh, the nicest human I have ever met." He looks down at his big hairy feet, extremely shy.
"I thought Gandalf was the nicest human you've ever met?" I laugh, wiping away the remaining water from my eyes as light returns to my weary heart.
"Well, he is a wizard, so he doesn't count." Bilbo finally meets my eyes before shrugging with a smile.
End of Chapter.
OK! We made it! We're safely at Bilbo's house. Safe from the cold cruel world!.
Were you a little freaked out when Bilbo didn't answer his door? Muaahahahaha! Tricked ya didn't I. Leave me a review and let me know what you think. I have to keep you on your toes, otherwise it'll be the same boring story everyone writes about. I will lead you on a big emotional rollercoaster by the time I'm through with you. Leave a review and tell me your thoughts!
Does Peyton cry too much? I'm just writing her how I would react (I don't consider myself a crier, but I would cry a lot) XD
By the by, I've looked at so many maps of the Shire and all of them are a little different from each other. In this version, you have to go through ByWater if you want to get to Hobbiton.
Next chapter the company comes into the picture! (Finally!) I love the company, and Thorin, and so do you. Admit it, that's why we're all gathered on this fanfiction in the first place; to read about the company of Thorin Oakenshield.