The Lure of Adventure

Jenny

It was an hour-long trek between where her spaceship was parked and where Kasterborous had set up their camp, up on a mountain so that they had a good view of the enemy down in the gullet of a valley with the damp ravine running alongside. It was not a fun walk. Mostly because it didn't take an hour, it took two, because she dragged Jack around the block while she gathered water in a bucket and killed something to cook. She didn't have the foresight to bring anything to eat with them on the ship, and besides, she always liked a challenge. She didn't know what she killed, some large lump of wildlife, but she made Jack carry it while she lugged the water and her bow and arrow. It was very comedic, the sight of him blooded and almost naked carrying a dead animal around, like he'd killed it himself with his own two hands. Wrung its neck, or something.

"Nice to finally get a look at the scenery around here," Jack said. It was a vividly coloured tropical wilderness, and quite gorgeous. Jenny had been taking pictures of it all on her phone, wishing she had an actual camera, whenever she had some downtime over the last two days she and River had been there scouting the place for Jack. Only two areas of Rospaonus were populated by the jungles; the poles. In the middle the planet was completely barren, baking hot and desolate, holding no life at all. And then on top of that, it was privileged to the most wonderful storms, sandstorms in the wastelands and hurricanes in the north and south. They were in the north currently. "Even if you are making me carry all this dead weight around."

"You'll be grateful when we have something to eat later," Jenny said shortly. She would rather not be alone with him, she would rather be alone with anyone else in the world than Captain Jack Harkness, she would rather River had gone to collect him, or at least come and waited at the camp perimeter. Or she would rather have just left Jack to his fate, let River maybe hire the Shadow to chase after him, so that she could be in bed somewhere drinking hot chocolate in the arms of her lovely girlfriend.

"Found him alright, then?" River Song asked as they stepped out of a row of trees surrounding the clearing with her spaceship in the middle of it. The ship was invisible, though, because it was practically a big mirror that would throw off the sunlight if it wasn't cloaked. Definitely there, there and nicely air conditioned within.

"You bet she did, and then some," Jack announced, indicating the dead animal across his shoulders. He carried it over to their campfire and dropped it down on the ground. Then he stood proudly with his hands in his hips like it had been him who killed it. Jenny set the bucket of water down near where the unconcealed stairs into the flying saucer were, ready to carry up and run through the ship's water purifier the next chance she got. "Say, uh, you don't happen to have any clothes?"

"River brought some," Jenny said.

"And a shower on the ship?"

"Nope, didn't realise the water tank was nearly empty when we left, no shower," Jenny said, "But you can take some of the soap, and there's a lagoon a ten-minute walk due east. Or you could wait for the next time it rains."

"Thanks, doll," Jack said, winking and slipping past her into the ship. She didn't like him going on that ship. She felt like he was invading something sacred, and then she thought about how ridiculous she would sound saying that Jack had infected her 'sacred spaceship' with his presence. Jenny remained utterly silent until he had taken the soap and clothes and disappeared into the brush of the jungle again, busying herself by carefully skinning her animal.

"That's quite the cold shoulder you're giving him," River commented.

"It's forty degrees, my shoulder isn't cold in the slightest," Jenny muttered, stabbing the animal with her machete now retrieved from in a nearby tree where she had 'stashed' it for 'safe keeping' and dragging the knife all the way down its gullet so that she could peel it. She didn't really need to think about what she was doing, skinning an animal and preparing it to eat was a bit like riding a bike, you never really forgot.

"You know what I mean."

"I'm fine."

"You should call her."

"What?" Jenny looked up and met River's knowing gaze. She was doing that 'maternal' thing again. Jenny hated that maternal thing.

"God, it's a miracle you're managing to hold down this relationship. You haven't rung her once in the last two days," River said. Correct, she had not. She had actually not rung Clara for three or four days. She had actually not even had her phone on her.

"I just… she'll worry," Jenny said, "She thinks I'm reckless, I can't tell her I've gone to rescue my ex-husband from a treasure-hunting lunatic on one of the most hostile planets known to mankind."

"You've already done the rescuing part. You can leave, if you want, leave Jack and I here." Jenny stopped what she was doing.

"Leave you here?"

"To figure out how the map works, find whatever it's leading to. I've got my emergency teleporter back to the TARDIS," River explained. Jenny gawked at her.

"Find it? Get the map – are you kidding me? That map is what Jack got kidnapped over to begin with." River just held her gaze, and didn't say anything else. "No, no. You are not doing this to me, Song. Is this why you were really so insistent about rescuing him? I bet you've been scheming all along, I bet you knew what he was after this entire time."

"Oh, get over yourself, no I didn't," River scoffed, "But once I get a whiff of adventure…"

"You're a hologram, you can't get a whiff of anything."

"A metaphorical whiff."

"And I'll metaphorically drag the both of you back onto the ship and take you away myself if I have to," she said.

"Yet people say you're reckless."

"You know what?" Jenny said, brandishing the machete at River, though River was sat a good few metres away on a log they had dragged over the previous night when they had originally set up the camp, so this didn't really have much effect, "I'm going to go call her." She stabbed the machete back down into the corpse and skulked away with her shoulders hunched, pulling up the staircase as she did so that River couldn't eavesdrop on her conversation.

/

It was a good couple of hours later that she finally finished smoking a whole row of funny-coloured, alien steaks over a fire. And contrary to what River Song would claim, it didn't take Jenny a few hours to cook just because she spent a hefty sum of those hours (most of them) on the phone, even though she definitely had spent a hefty sum of those hours on the phone, having to explain her absence and whereabouts for the last few days of trawling around a jungle planet in a flying saucer looking for her ex. Her ex who was now clean, and dressed, and chowing down on some of her medium rare steaks with his fingers. Nobody was really fussed for cutlery.

"So then, Jack," River began, looking at their inconsumable steaks rather enviously, "Put us out of our misery. What's all the fuss about this map?"

"Put you out of your misery? Didn't someone already do that?" he jibed, then tore off a very large piece of steak with his teeth. River watched him as he made a string of exaggerated chewing noises, then pointed at the steak in his hand and said to Jenny, "This is some good steak. Careful Fangs doesn't hear about you having stake and garlic."

"You know, you're not very good at avoiding questions," Jenny answered him. It was twilight now, with the rich night sky visible only just through the canopy of thick leaves. She hated those leaves, they kept in all the heat and the moisture and the humidity, but weren't strong enough to keep out the rain when it started. It reminded her of a different tropical planet she had frequented a few decades back after becoming depressed and accidentally getting involved in a drugs cartel, but that was a story for another time. They were sitting around a lantern now, not wanting to light a fire because the smoke would give away their position to Kasterborous, whom River claimed she had seen send search parties out into the jungle.

"Tell that to Gwen Cooper who, by the way, is kind of interested in these kittens we've acquired on the TARDIS. How are the kittens? I've been away for so long, it feels," Jack asked.

"They're fine," said Jenny, "I think. I don't really know. Adam Mitchell said they have worms, which I don't understand considering they've been born on a spaceship."

"The map, though?" River persisted.

"All kittens have worms. How many are there? I think I left before Princess Sparkle Tutu gave birth."

"Five," Jenny answered.

"The map," River interrupted.

"Oh yeah? What're they like?"

"Well, they're all kind of different, you know?" she said, "One of them, this black fur ball, totally tried to savage me. It tries to savage everyone, actually. Then there's a calico, a blue Abyssinian, a hairless one and this one with these tentacles."

"Tentacles?"

"Yeah, it's freaky."

"I guess you never know what kind of weird thing is gonna pop out when somebody gets knocked up on the TARDIS, huh?" Jack said slyly, glancing at River. River was not impressed.

"Well. If the two of you have stopped flirting-"

"Hey!" Jenny exclaimed.

"We were not!" Jack agreed.

"Mmm, clearly," River muttered. They weren't even sitting near each other, River had Jack on her right on the log and Jenny was sitting on the floor on the left, nearly at the other side of the lantern. He just wanted to know about the kittens, and she kind of liked the kittens, they were one of the positives about living on the TARDIS again. "The map, Jack. Because I have suspicions, but I'd hate to suggest any of them to Jenny before I knew for sure."

"It's just the map. It's a valuable piece of history, heritage," Jack said. It sounded like he wasn't telling them the full story, and going by River's expression, she was aware of that. Did she know what the map was to, really?

"Whose heritage?" River pried.

"General heritage. Of civilisation." River glared at him as he munched his steak.

"Alright, what's going on?" Jenny asked. River didn't say a word, so she turned her eyes on Jack. She used to be able to make him tell her things by giving him eyes and pouting a little, would that still work? Would that be wrong of her to do…? She employed the imploring eyes, at least, but left the pout in reserve, in case of emergency.

"The Conqueror thinks the map is to the Singularity."

"I knew it!" River exclaimed.

"The what?" Jenny asked. This wasn't going to turn into the Anobine Cartax all over again, was it? She was sick and tired of people going insane trying to find random treasures, but it most certainly would not surprise her.

"It's a relic, a Time Lord relic," River said. Jenny's eyes widened. A Time Lord relic? On that godforsaken planet? "Doesn't your father tell you anything? The group is called Kasterborous."

"So what?"

"So that's the constellation where Gallifrey is," Jack said, "The Conqueror wants the Singularity."

"Which is what?" Jenny pressed them. She didn't like this whole being-in-the-dark thing, not one bit.

"A WMD," River answered. Jenny dropped her steak in the grass.

"In the wrong hands," Jack cut across her, trying to avoid Jenny's wrath, "And that's what Torchwood does, you know? Keeps alien technology from falling into the wrong hands. It wasn't intended to be used as a weapon, alright?"

"I have half a mind to call my dad, you know."

"No," Jack ordered her firmly. "Do not call him, the Conqueror getting wind of the Doctor being here would not be good. We just need to get the map and take it back to the TARDIS, okay? Then we can find the Singularity."

"You just said you want to stop it from falling into the wrong hands," Jenny argued, "But now you want to find it?"

"And stop it-"

"Bullshit," said River, "You didn't run out of the TARDIS on your own to come and stop an ancient Time Lord device from getting taken by a lunatic."

"Hey, I'm a very noble guy, Professor."

"You want it for something, too," she said.

"I'm trying to save lives," Jack gritted his teeth while he talked.

"She's right," said Jenny, "You're lying. What do you want with this thing? And who are these people naming themselves 'Kasterborous'? And this 'Conqueror'-" she stopped. The Doctor, the Master, and now the Conqueror? "Holy – is this bloke a Time Lord? A lost Time Lord who didn't die in the Time War!?"

"No," said Jack, "He's a lunatic, like River said. He thinks he's destined to start a new breed of Time Lords, that he's biologically chosen. But he's human. Classic psychopath, grandiose delusions, probably tortured baby birds when he was a kid. That's why they kidnapped me, because they killed me and I came back, they think I'm a Time Lord, or that I know Time Lords."

"Is that why Ordov went all funny when you mentioned regenerations!?"

"Yeah, and now they'll have suspicions about you," Jack said, "But your father cannot know about this, he cannot come here. If the Conqueror gets his hands on a genuine Time Lord, he could make the map work; that's what's wrong with it, that's why it's broken. There hasn't been a Time Lord to activate it for thousands of years."

"Excuse me?" Jenny asked, going cold.

"Thousands of years, I-"

"No," she said, shaking her head at him, the good mood brought on by her long conversation with Clara quickly evaporating the longer this conversation went on, "You said 'genuine Time Lord.'"

"Uh-oh…" River murmured.

"Well… yeah. We take the map from Kasterborous and the TARDIS will probably be able to activate it without the Doctor having to get involved at all," said Jack, "He can't know, he can't come after it." Jenny did not like this, not one bit. Even more than the simple implication that she was not a 'genuine' enough Time Lord to make this stupid gadget work, wherever it was. No doubt the Conqueror kept it on him, or something.

"What does it do?" she insisted, "Tell me or I'll ring the Doctor and tell him everything about this Conqueror and Rospaonus and a 'Singularity' and see how you like that. Go on. Explain."

"It does what Rose can do, harnesses the raw power of the time vortex," River began, "But Rose has evolved to handle that kind of responsibility, anyone could pick up the Singularity and have the power of the universe at their fingertips. Capable of erasing people out of existence without ever being near them." Jenny was appalled.

"Well it's no wonder they locked it up here and threw away the key!"

"A key that the enemy already have," Jack reminded her.

"But if they need a Time Lord to find it then they're not going to find it, are they?" she hissed, "So why can't we just pack up and leave them here to get lost?"

"Because I need it, alright? I need it," Jack insisted, "And besides, you can't walk away, because in case you're forgetting, your father isn't the only other Time Lord flying around, is he? There's still the Master. And the Master would probably do anything to get their hands on the Singularity if they found out there was a way to find it." What on Earth could Jack possibly want with an ancient Time Lord weapon of mass destruction?

She didn't know what to do. She wanted to call the Doctor, because she didn't think that Jack and River's reasons for keeping her father out of this was because of concern for his safety, she thought it was concern for the execution of their own individual, ulterior motives. Besides, she didn't really want to put him in danger… but along with that, she didn't want herself to be in danger, either, because what if something happened? What if she got kidnapped again? She had been kidnapped in Chernobyl, after all, but maybe if she was extra-careful and paid attention to stop herself from getting cocky… maybe some of the stuff Martha and Clara said to her about her self-preservation instincts was sinking in, if she was taking so much heed of their worries about her mortality. Ultimately, she did not think she quite trusted Jack or River to be responsible when it came to this lost artefact, and in her experience there was only one of the three of them who had never been corrupted by masses of raw power.

"Fine. I won't call him. But I won't leave, either, I'm staying and we're going to do this all my way and we're going to be safe about it, agreed?"

"You can't stay," said River.

"Uh, yeah, exactly," said Jack.

"What about Clara?" River pointed out. Jack nodded along.

"What about Clara?" Jenny asked them, "I'm not leaving you two here because I don't really trust you with this device, so if anything happens to me you'll both be answering to her, because I guarantee that she'll understand why I stayed here to keep the pair of you out of trouble. Don't either of you pretend like you have any concerns for my relationship when really you just want me out of here so that I can't do what dad would do and destroy this stupid thing. And besides. It needs a Time Lord to make it work." She stood up, picking her steak from in the grass where it had fallen and brushing the plants and dirt off it.

"Jenny, you're not-"

"End of story, Jack," she said, biting into the steak, "I'll just lock you on the ship and switch River off if I have to, then call down Rose to help me destroy this thing instead. I'm sure she'd be willing." That clinched the deal. Jack still saw a possibility in being able to use the Singularity for whatever he wanted it for if Jenny was there, whereas Rose Tyler was an invincible, godlike creature who could brush him aside like he was a dust mite. River probably thought the same thing, but also didn't care about if it got destroyed or not. Only there for the fame and glory, the thrill of the chase. "Now, I'm going to have a wash in the lagoon and finish this steak; if I come back here and find the pair of you aren't here, then I will call the TARDIS and I will bring down Rose, so just do as I say, yeah?"

"Who put you in charge?" Jack muttered.

"Blame River, she's the one who dragged me out." Jack shot a glare at River, who shrugged innocently. "Anyway, I outrank you. I've been reinstated as Major Young now."

"Oh, so now we have to call you Major? Sure thing, Major," Jack said sourly as she walked past him to leave the clearing and head towards the lagoon. He raised his fingers to his forehead.

"Don't salute, or I'll break your fingers," she ordered, then vanished into the shadows of the jungle.