The Child That Never Was
Author's Note: This is dark...darkest thing I've ever written.
Minato, Kimiko, and Himari belong to phantomzombie. (Minato is 10, Kimiko is 6, and Himari is 9)
Hayato, Ichiro, Daisuke, Riku, Mai, Hotaru, Kasumi II, Nariko, Kaito, Fuyuko, Benjiro, Chiyoko, Mrs. Takahashi, Mitsu, and Mana belong to me.
Every other character that appears belongs to Atlus.
If there was one word to describe the Amamiya Family's recent behavior, it was ecstatic. That's because Ann was currently ten weeks pregnant with her and Ren's third child. The couple would never forget the look of excitement on their youngest daughter, Kimiko's, face when they told her she was going to be a big sister. It was the happiest they had ever seen her, and she was a very cheerful child already.
Ever since she learned that she was going to be a big sister, Kimiko's been hanging out with her older brother Minato much more often, usually looking to get some advice on how to be a great older sibling. Ren and Ann never would've imagined that having a third baby would bring their two children closer together.
It also wasn't long after they found out about the pregnancy when they told all of their friends, and they seemed just as happy about the news as they did. Ren and Ann even thought about who the third baby's godparents should be, and they settled on Yuuki Mishima for the godfather and Makoto for the godmother. When they told Makoto about how she's going to be the third baby's godmother, she was so happy that she went out the next day and bought them a mobile for the baby's crib when he/she is born.
The mobile in question was night time themed with small plush moons, stars, owls, raccoons, and squirrels hanging from it.
On top of that, Ren and Ann wanted to make sure that they were prepared for the arrival of their new bundle of joy. Ann already looked into getting the baby's wardrobe together, making sure the clothes are unisex, while Ren got to work on converting the guest bedroom into a nursery. Some would look at the two of them and say that they're preparing too early, but they were too happy to care.
Everything was going wonderfully for the Amamiyas as they usually do. No real, groundbreaking hardships to speak of.
Unfortunately, all of that is about to change…
This Friday started off like many other days, with Ren and Ann waking up together in their comfy, luxurious, canopy bed, the first thing they see when they open their eyes being their smiling faces.
Ren: (Sighs contently) Good morning, Ann.
Ann: (Smiles) Good morning, Ren. How'd you sleep?
Ren: Fine. You?
Ann: Same.
Ren: (Places a hand over Ann's belly and gently rubs it) And good morning to you too, little one. (Kisses Ann's stomach)
Ann: Oh, Ren, you're so cute.
Ren: So, you're ten weeks in. How do you feel?
Ann: I feel fine. I'm still cramping a little bit though. But from what I remember when I was pregnant with Minato and Kimiko, I'm pretty sure that's normal.
Ren: Yeah, I'm sure it'll go away. (Kisses her forehead). Ready to start our day?
Ann: Yeah.
The two of them got out of bed and went to wake up their children for school. Once Minato and Kimiko got dressed in their school clothes, Ren made the two of them some pancakes for breakfast with some bacon and fruit on the side. After breakfast, the two Amamiya kids were ready to go to school. They gave both parents a kiss, they gave Morgana a head pat, and went on their merry way.
With both kids gone, Ann and Ren settled down in the living room to watch the news before continuing with their day. The couple didn't have much planned. Ren was just going to go to work while Ann stayed home and continued working on designs for some new dresses. Same stuff, different day. As they watched the news, however, Ann placed a hand over her stomach as a pained expression appeared on her face. Seeing this made Ren worry.
Ren: Is it cramps again?
Ann: Yeah. These ones hurt a little bit more.
Ren: That doesn't sound good. Should we maybe go to the doctor?
Ann: I don't think so. My uterus is probably expanding to make room for our baby.
Ren: (Unsure) Well, if it gets any worse don't be afraid to let me know.
Ann: I'm telling you Ren, I'm fine. Maybe a nice warm shower will help.
Ann gets up from her seat and makes her way to the upstairs bathroom, leaving Ren and Morgana alone in the living room.
Morgana: I don't know about this, Ren. What if these cramps that Lady Ann is getting is a warning sign that something terrible is about to happen?
Ren: Yeah, I hear you. And after hearing that her cramps are getting worse just now, I want to do nothing more than to take her to Dr. Takemi to see if everything is alright, but she doesn't seem to think anything is wrong. And it's not like I can force her to go to the doctor either. I just don't know what to do.
Morgana: You could always bribe her into seeing the doctor by offering to bake her a cake if she goes.
Ren: Morgana, Ann is not our kids. I can't just bribe her like that.
Morgana: Well, maybe remind her that the baby growing in her gut is yours too and your input on the situation matters.
Ren: I guess I could do that. Yeah, I'll wait for her to finish her shower and then we'll talk this thing out. In the meantime, I'm going to make her her favorite three-egg omelet so she has something delicious to nosh on when she's done.
Ren made his way into the kitchen to make Ann a scrumptious breakfast as Morgana just curled up on a nearby chair by the window to take in the sunlight.
Meanwhile, Ann was in her and Ren's bedroom getting some clothes ready for when she's finished with her shower. While grabbing her clothes from the closet, she looked up on a shelf to find the mobile that Makoto gave them. She grabbed it from the shelf and held it in her hands, admiring it.
Ann: (To herself) This really is such a cute mobile that Makoto bought for us. I know the baby will love it.
Ann flicks a small switch on the mobile that causes the plushies attached to it to slowly start spinning as a soothing melody starts to play from it. Hearing the tune made Ann smile and feel nostalgic for the days when Minato and Kimiko were babies. All the times she and Ren made them laugh. All the family outings they took together. And all the joy she felt whenever the babies had their 'first' of something; their first Christmases, their first steps, their first words. She felt so blessed that she'd go through those same happy and rewarding feelings for a third time, and she imagined how much more interesting and fulfilling her, Ren, Morgana, Minato, and Kimiko's lives will be with a third baby in the house.
As the mobile stopped playing its song, Ann put it back on the shelf where she found it, placed the clothes she took out for herself on the bed, and then walked to the bathroom where she undressed and started her shower.
Ann let out a content sigh as the warm water made contact with her body. As she began to hum the mobile's melody, she washed her luscious blonde locks before grabbing a soap bar to clean herself off. She started with her arms, then worked her way to her shoulders, neck and back, before going down to her chest and her belly, the latter of which she lovingly caressed as she washed.
With her upper body all cleaned up, Ann then worked on washing her nethers. But when she put her hands down there to clean, she felt a warm, thick, sticky fluid caress her fingers, making her freeze up in shock. She slowly brought her hand up to her face to see that it was covered in blood!
She looked down at her leg to see some blood droplets running down it, and that's when she knew that the cramps she was experiencing weren't just normal pregnancy cramps, and her baby was in danger!
(Music: One Shot from Super Paper Mario)
Full panic set in for the woman as her blood covered hand started to shake and she opened her mouth to scream. But she was in so much shock she couldn't even let out a simple squeak. It was as if some unforeseeable force had a grip on her throat that was preventing her from releasing all of her shock and fear into a concentrated shriek. This had never happened to Ann before, and she didn't know anyone who went through the same thing. This was new, uncharted, horrifying, territory for her.
By some miracle, Ann managed to come to her senses a few seconds later and then…
Ann: REEEEEEEEEEEEEEN!
Downstairs in the kitchen, Ren had finished preparing Ann's omelet when he heard her scream of terror. This causes him and Morgana to come bolting up the stairs to see what was wrong.
Ren: Hang on, Ann, we're coming!
Ren and Morgana burst into the bathroom and they found Ann still staring at her bloody hand in shock. The man and cat looked at her leg to see that blood was running down it from her crotch, and soon they too were panicking.
Ren: OH MY GOD, ANN!
Morgana: WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING TO YOU!?
Ann: I don't know! I don't know! What is this?!
Ren: Babe, I think you're having a miscarriage!
Ann: WHAT?!
Morgana: What does that mean?!
Ann: It means our baby's dying!
Morgana: What?! Well, uh, can't you stop it?! Like, there's gotta be something we can do, right?!
Ren: I don't know! (An idea comes to him) We've gotta get to Takemi's Clinic! Maybe she'll know what to do!
Ann: Good idea!
Ren: Alright, babe, you get dried off and dressed! I'll call Tae and let her know we're coming! (Turns to Morgana) Morgana, you'll be fine on your own until we get back, right?
Morgana: Of course! Don't worry about me! You and Lady Ann have a baby to save!
And so that's how Ren and Ann found themselves in every expecting parent's worst nightmare: a miscarriage!
In a matter of seconds, Ren had Tae on the phone and told them their current situation. She told Ren that once a miscarriage happens, there's not much that can be done to stop it, but she'll do her best. After getting off the phone with her, Ren called his boss and told him he wouldn't be making it to work so he could help his wife during this difficult time. The boss understood and wished him and Ann the best of luck. With all the appropriate phone calls made, Ren and Ann, the latter of whom was dried off and dressed, got in their car and hurried off for Takemi's Clinic.
As Ren drove, he had his eyes locked on the road and going over the recommended speed limits. Under normal circumstances, Ren would always follow the rules of the road…but these weren't normal circumstances, now were they?
A jolt of fear passed through Ren as next to him in the passenger seat, Ann winced in pain as another painful cramp came over her.
Ann: (Holding her stomach) God, this can't be happening! Please let this be some kind of cruel joke!
Ren: Everything's going to be okay, Ann, just hang in there! (Begins praying to himself as he drives) God, please let everything be okay! Let our baby be okay!
(End Music)
Within minutes, Ann and Ren finally make it to Takemi's Clinic. With Ren carrying Ann in his arms bridal style, they enter the clinic and find Tae waiting for them.
Tae: Quick, get her onto the bed!
Ren gently placed Ann onto the bed that was in the room and made sure she was as comfortable as she could be.
Tae: When did this start?
Ann: It started as a light cramping, but I thought that was normal for a pregnancy. It wasn't until earlier today when the cramping got worse, and when I took a shower that's when I noticed blood down there! (Winces in pain again) And now the cramps have gotten so much worse!
Takemi looked worried. She was beginning to think that there was nothing that could be done, and it was too late to try and save the unborn Amamiya child. But she knew she had to try.
Ren: Is everything going to be alright, Tae?
Tae: I'll do my best. But I need to concentrate. Come back in an hour or two. I'll text you when we're done.
Ren: Okay. (Goes up to Ann, his face level with her, and locks eyes with her) Babe, look at me. Everything is going to be okay, I promise…I love you.
Ann: I love you too.
The couple share a kiss before Ren leaves the clinic and Tae gets to work on trying to solve the problem.
What followed for Ren was two hours of pure unadulterated terror. He didn't know what was going to happen next. Was Ann going to be alright? Was their baby going to be alright? What would he do if neither was going to be alright?
He walked around the block a few times to try and clear his mind, thinking the fresh air would do him some good. He even stopped at Café Leblanc for some breakfast. He was served by Sojiro, who was delighted to see him again, and asked what he was doing in the neighborhood. Ren replied by stretching the truth by saying he just took Ann for a 'routine check-up' for the baby. He didn't want to worry Sojiro with whatever was going on in his life.
Ren worried about Ann and their baby so much that he hardly touched his breakfast, only taking a few small bites out of it. Sojiro just watched as the man who, at one point in time was a teenager under his care, pushed the food around with his fork. He knew something wasn't right, but he decided the best thing to do was leave it alone and hope that whatever problem Ren was going through would resolve itself.
Ren's phone buzzed in his pocket, and that's when he saw a text from Tae that read:
'We're done.'
Ren paid Sojiro for his hardly eaten breakfast before leaving the café and heading back to the clinic, running as he did so. Sojiro stared after Ren with worry, and hoped that everything was going alright in his life.
When Ren got back to the clinic, he found Tae and Ann just standing there, both of them sporting very sad looks on their faces, Ann especially looking very devastated. Ren had a look of concern on his face as Ann slowly walked up to him before hugging him and burying her face in his shoulder. Ren looked at Tae in a mix of confusion, fear, and sadness.
Ren: Tae…Is…Is our baby okay?
Tae just closed her eyes as a single tear fell from her face, and Ren knew that there was no good news coming.
Tae: I did everything I could…but I couldn't save your baby…I'm so sorry, Ren. You too, Ann.
(Music: Confusion from Mother 3)
And just like that the whole world just stopped to Ren. Time came to a standstill as he felt his heart slowly begin to break and his body began to feel numb. What he just heard Tae say to him were words no parent ever wants to hear. In the span of a few hours he went from an expecting father to a mourning father. And he knew that if the news of the miscarriage was making him feel this bad, then Ann must've been feeling a thousand times worse because she actually had the baby inside of her.
Ren looked down at Ann, who still had her face hidden in her husband's shoulder. He couldn't even imagine the type of mental and emotional pain that she was going through. Ren usually had a knack for putting a smile on Ann's face anytime she was feeling down, but there was nothing he could do or say at this moment that could cheer her up, even just a little bit. The only thing he could do was soothingly rub her back as a means to tell her that he was there for her and he loved her no matter what.
Ann kept her face buried in Ren's shoulder for almost five minutes, not saying or doing anything. She wasn't even crying! Ren wasn't sure if she wasn't crying because she was trying to be strong for him, or if her brain is still trying to process some of what has happened. She then looked up at her husband with the most depressed look in her eyes.
Ann: I want to go home now.
Ren: Alright, honey, we're leaving. (Looks over at Tae) Thanks for trying to help, Tae. (Reaches for his wallet)
Tae: You don't have to pay me for this one, Ren. You two are going through a lot right now. (Ren puts his wallet away and nods his thanks) Again, I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope everything works out for you two in the end.
Ren: Yeah…thanks.
And with that, Ren and Ann leave Takemi's clinic, the saddest and worst day of their lives officially in full swing.
The car ride home was a quiet one. As Ren drove him and Ann back home, Ann just sat in the passenger seat next to him, looking down at the floor, lost in thought.
Ann: (Thinking) Why did this have to happen? Why us? Why now? Minato and Kimiko's pregnancies were cut and dried, no complications at all. Why are things different now? Other than my age, nothing changed about how I handled this pregnancy compared to the last two times. What did I do wrong? Should I have done something different? Is something wrong with me? Is this my fault?
Stopping at a red light, Ren looked over at his wife, her silence deeply worrying him, and he lovingly caressed her arm to try and get her to smile. Still lost in thought and not wanting to be touched, Ann snatched her arm away from him.
Ren: (Carefully) Do you want to talk about it?
Ann: (Still looking at the car floor) There's nothing to talk about. It's over. It's done.
Ren was heartbroken by his wife's despondent responses, but he understood her completely. She'd talk about the miscarriage whenever she felt she was truly ready to talk about it, and he respected her wishes.
As the traffic light turned green again, the couple continued their drive back home.
(End Music)
Ever since they left for Takemi's Clinic, Morgana was looking out the front window, desperately awaiting Ren and Ann's return. He had hoped just as much as they did that their baby would be fine.
A smile appeared on the cat's face when he saw their car pull up in the driveway. But any hope of good news was dashed when he saw Ren's body language when he got out of the car and then walked to the passenger door to let Ann out. When Ann got out, her body language looked even more depressed than Ren's and the look on her face made it look like she was going to break down into tears at any moment. It broke Morgana's heart to see Ann like that.
Outside, Ren helped Ann up the front steps to their porch, but just as they got to the front door, Ann instead went over to the porch swing that they had.
Ann: (Sits down on the porch swing) Can we just sit out here for a few minutes? I just need some fresh air.
Ren: Of course, Ann. Whatever you need.
Ren sat down on the porch swing next to his wife. He placed an arm around her and he began to rub her shoulder, but Ann still looked down at the floor, not speaking or doing anything.
At this point, Morgana came walking onto the porch via the pet door that was installed on the Amamiya's front door. He walked up to his owners with a look of concern adorned upon his face. Ren noticed Morgana's presence, and the man just looked at the cat with a frown as he shook his head, and that's when Morgana knew that they lost the baby.
Morgana: Lady Ann…I'm so sorry…Are you okay?
Suddenly, Ann felt a surge of raw emotion course through her. Tears began to well up in her eyes and stream down her face and onto the floor of the porch. She felt a lump in her throat as she began to whimper. And finally, with a deep inhale…
Ann: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Ann's scream of total anguish echoed throughout the neighborhood, and Ren and Morgana could hear the undiluted emotional pain in her voice. Ren held her tightly and caressed her while Morgana nuzzled her leg until Ann calmed down, at which point all three of them went back into the house and worried about what they'd have to do next; break the news to their children.
Afternoon rolled around and Minato and Kimiko were walking home with a paper bag in hand. There was a toy store not far from where their elementary school was, and the two Amamiya children thought of a great idea to show their love for the new baby. They saved up allowance for a few weeks so they could buy the baby two cute, adorable plushies, one from each of them.
Minato had bought a white bunny rabbit plushie.
Kimiko had bought a black cat plushie that looked just like Morgana.
Kimiko: The new baby is going to love these toys we bought when it comes. What a great idea, Minato.
Minato: Thank you. I think the baby is going to love our plushies too, and I'm sure mom and dad are going to love our generosity as well.
Kimiko: Yeah. I can't wait to see the looks on their faces when we show them what we bought.
Minato and Kimiko walked up the driveway, up the front steps, and up to the front door, blissfully unaware of the horrible news they were about to receive.
Minato: (Opens the door) We're home! (Sees nobody at the front door waiting for them)
The two kids were surprised by the lack of a proper greeting from their family. On most days, Ren and/or Ann would be waiting at the front door for their children to return so they could give them a hug, and then Morgana would come up to them so Kimiko and Minato could give the cat a head pat.
Kimiko: Mom? Dad? Morgana? Where are you?
Ren: (From the living room; calmly) We're in here kids.
Kimiko and Minato curiously entered the living room and they found a rather depressing sight. What they saw was Ren and Ann on the couch, with Ann covering herself with a blanket as her head rested in Ren's lap while he was stroking her hair. Neither of them were smiling. Morgana was sitting on the floor looking up at the couple, looking equally sad. The brother and sister walked up to their parents to see just what was going on.
Minato: What's wrong, mom? Are you sick?
Ann: No, Minato, worse.
Kimiko: What could be worse than that?
Ann struggled to tell her kids what had happened to her unborn child. This was something she had been dreading doing since she and Ren got back home. She didn't have it in her to break Minato and Kimiko's hearts.
Ann: I can't…Ren, you tell them.
Minato: Tell us what? What's happening?
The responsibility to crush Minato and Kimiko's happiness has now fallen on Ren's shoulders. He looked at his two kids as they stared at him with looks of worry on their faces. The man bit his lip, anxious about the aftermath of what he was about to tell them. There was no other way to say it, so he just closed his eyes and came right out with it.
Ren: The baby's gone, kids…We lost it.
Minato and Kimiko, at first, looked confused. With them still being kids, the idea of a miscarriage was one they had no knowledge about.
Kimiko: How do you lose a baby if it's not born yet? It should still be in mom's belly, right? I mean, if you lost it you can get it back, right?
Ann: No, we can't. It's called a miscarriage, Kimiko…(Shuts her eyes) Your baby sibling died while it was inside me.
(Music: Sad Girl from Super Mario Galaxy)
And that was what caused Kimiko and Minato's faces to drop as despair slowly but surely filled their hearts.
Minato: What! The baby's…dead? How does that even…that…that doesn't make any sense!
Ren: We're sorry kids. We know you two were just as excited for this as we were. But the sad truth is that…these things just…happen.
Minato and Kimiko couldn't believe what they had just heard. They looked at each other before looking back at their parents.
Kimiko: No…no…no, this…this has to be some kind of joke. You're pulling our legs!
Minato: Yeah, you don't joke about this with your own children.
Ren: (With tears in his eyes) It's not a joke, kids! We're being serious!
Ann: We're not trying to be funny right now…this is real.
When they realized that their parents weren't kidding, they had their own separate reactions. Minato just stayed still in a state of shock, looking at the wall behind the couch Ren and Ann were situated on, trying to process this new, harsh reality he was in. Kimiko on the other hand was becoming overwhelmed by hordes of negative emotions. She wanted to cry and throw a tantrum like most kids would in this situation, but she knew it wouldn't help the situation and she decided to try and hold back her emotions…which was a lot easier said than done.
Kimiko: (Ready to cry) But, but…(Takes the paper bag with the plush bunny and cat inside) The baby can't die! We already bought these plushies for it! It can't die! Who's going to play with them now?
The younger Amamiya child took the plushies out from the bag and held them up to show her parents. Ren and Ann were briefly touched that their children were willing to shell out their own money for the baby's happiness. But they became saddened again knowing that the plushies will never be properly loved or played with.
Kimiko: (With tears streaming down her face; her words separated with gasps and snivels) And…And I was so excited to be a big sister…I was going to play games with the baby…And help you two with it…and love it…and care for it…and…and….WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!
Kimiko covered her face with her hands as she sat down on the floor and bawled her eyes out. Ren and Ann felt absolutely awful for telling their kids about the miscarriage and making Kimiko cry…but they knew it had to be done. Morgana hated seeing Kimiko cry so he walked over to the little girl and cuddled up next to her in an attempt to quell her cries. Kimko's wails were reduced to whimpers and quiet sobs as she held the black cat next to her.
Meanwhile, Minato had just come out of his state of shock thanks to his sister's crying and he looked back at Ren and Ann, tears beginning to form in his eyes as well. His parents looked at him as he tried to say something, his lips quivering and hands balled up into fists.
Minato: If…I swear if this is a joke…
Ann: (Suddenly snaps) It's not a joke, Minato! How many times do we have to tell you!?
Ren: Ann...
Minato: I…I'm sorry, mom…I…I just..(Begins to whimper)
Ann: (Begins to feel remorse) I'm sorry, Minato, I didn't mean to yell at you…It's just too much (Sits up on the couch).
Ren: Come here, kids.
Ren and Ann opened up their arms for their children, and Kimiko and Minato ran into them for a hug. The Amamiya children put their sadness on full display as they let out all of their tears while their parents tried to comfort them.
Ren: There, there, Kimiko. Everything's going to be alright.
Ann: It's okay, Minato. Let it all out. I'm here for you.
Kimiko and Minato took the news about as poorly as Ren and Ann thought they would, and they didn't want to let go of their children as long as they kept crying. Morgana just curled up and watched in sorrow as his owners crumbled under the emotional weight of the miscarriage.
(End Music)
(Music: Mipha's Theme from Breath of the Wild)
Later that night, after some pizza for dinner that Ren cooked up as a means for the family to get some comfort food in them, it was time for everyone to get dressed in their pajamas and go to bed. It had become cold and rainy outside, the weather reflecting how the Amamiyas were feeling on the inside.
Morgana was curled up in his cat bed in the living room, listening to the rainfall outside as he tried to sleep.
Kimiko was in her room, too depressed to sleep. All she could think about was how she wasn't going to be a big sister, and how unfair it was that the baby got taken away in the manner that it did. She just laid in her bed, holding the cat plush she had bought close to her heart.
Minato was also having a depressing, sleepless night. He tried reading some funny comics that he had on the shelf next to his bed, but none of them could make him crack a smile. Eventually, he just gave up on trying to feel better, and he just laid back and prayed that the unborn baby was in a better place.
Finally, Ren and Ann were in their room, nestled in their cozy canopy bed. Ren had Ann in his arms as she felt she was ready to try and share her feelings about the miscarriage with her husband.
Ann: I just don't understand. The pregnancy was going so perfectly, then I started cramping and bleeding, and the next thing I know the baby's gone. (Tears begin welling in her eyes again) I don't get it. I didn't do anything different now compared to when I was pregnant with Minato or Kimiko. So why did I miscarry? What did I do wrong?
Ren: Honey, you didn't do anything wrong. It's not your fault. It's nobody's fault. And this miscarriage doesn't mean you're broken or damaged. Like I told our kids, these things just happen.
Ann: But it's not fair! (Snivels) I know that sometimes bad things happen to good people…but it still hurts.
Ren: I know. I'm sad too. I know how bad you're hurting. But I want to let you know I'm here for you.
Ann: (Suddenly snaps again) How could you know how bad I'm hurting? You're not the one who carried a living being inside you for ten weeks! I feel like part of me died today! No…a part of me did die today! You can never know how bad I'm feeling! Not now! Not ever!
Ren fell silent. He knew that Ann was right. He'd never fully understand the type of pain his wife was in. He just hated seeing his wife in any type of pain, and he wanted to see her happy again. But there really was nothing he could do or say to make her feel better. Ren felt absolutely helpless.
Ren: Ann…I'm sorry.
Ann: (Sigh) No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have snapped at you like that just now.
Ren: No, don't be sorry. You have every right to express how you're feeling right now.
Ann: But that's no excuse for me to act like a bitch to you, Morgana, or the kids.
Ren: Sweetie, you're not acting like anything. You just went through a traumatic, heartbreaking loss. Your behavior is totally justified. And you're not alone. Lots of women all over the world go through what you're going through right now.
Ann: (Snivel) I know. But, I don't know any of those people. None of our friends or co-workers have gone through something like this. I feel like I have nobody to turn to for help.
Ren himself nearly broke down in tears when he heard Ann say that, knowing that she feels just as helpless as he does at this moment. Not to mention, she also just spoke another sad truth. As large as their group of friends were, it was true that none of them have gone through a miscarriage. And if they have, they certainly did a good job keeping it under wraps.
Ann: I don't want to talk about it anymore. I just want to try and get some sleep.
Ren: Alright, sweetie.
The two of them laid down and covered themselves up with the blankets.
Ann: I want to be held. Please hold me while I fall asleep.
Ren wraps his arms around his wife in a loving, protective manner, making sure that she knows she's loved. Ann wraps her own arms around her husband to make sure that she stays close to him throughout the night.
Ren: I'll never let go of you, Ann. I'll never leave your side. I love you so much. Nothing in the world can ever change that fact.
He gave his wife a kiss on the top of her head, but the moment that happened, another bout of crying ensued for Ann. She buried her face into her husband's chest and sobbed. Words couldn't begin to describe how much more broken Ren's heart had become from seeing and hearing the love of his life's mournful wails. He wanted more than anything to take her pain away, place it somewhere where no one will ever find it, and kiss away all of her tears, but no amount of kisses will ever make a situation like this better.
Ren: (Stroking his wife's hair as she cried, himself on the verge of tears) It's okay, honey, I'm here. Cry as much as you like, let it all out. (Snivel) Just…let it…all out…
Soon, even Ren couldn't fight back his sadness and he cried along with Ann, their tears falling from their eyes and staining the sheets and pillow cases beneath them. The couple sobbed in each other's arms until they both cried themselves to sleep.
(End Music)
Saturday morning came, and Ren was the first to wake up, wishing that yesterday was just a horrible dream and Ann was still pregnant. He looked down at the beautiful woman sleeping in his arms. He didn't want to leave her side until she woke up.
Ren stayed in bed with her for 20 minutes, waiting for her to wake up, at which point the sound of their bedroom door creaking woke Ann up and caught their attention. They looked to find Minato, Kimiko, and Morgana entering the room to check up on them.
Ren: Kimiko, Minato, Morgana.
Minato: Hey, dad. How did you two sleep?
He didn't need a vocal answer from them. One look at the tired, red, swollen, tear-ridden eyes on their parents gave Minato his answer.
Minato: (Glumly) Yeah, we didn't sleep too well either.
Ann and Ren felt bad after hearing how their children and Morgana had a rough night's sleep, and they knew it had something to do with the fact that the miscarriage was weighing heavy on their minds.
Ann: Come onto the bed with us, you three. You look like you could use a hug.
Minato, Kimiko, and Morgana joined Ren and Ann on their bed and they all shared a heartfelt group hug.
Ren: You know, kids, if there's anything you want to talk about, you can tell us.
Kimiko: We just don't get how a baby can die before it's even born.
Ren: From what I remember in school, miscarriages happen because the baby just wasn't developing correctly. Something about too many chromosomes, or not enough chromosomes.
Minato: What are chromosomes?
Ren: A structure found inside the nucleus of a cell that carries genetic information in the form of genes. You're learning about cells in school right now, if I'm not mistaken, Minato.
Minato: Yeah. (Chuckles) Well, at least I have something to impress the teacher with on Monday.
The family chuckles along with Minato before going back to paying attention to each other.
Kimiko: We didn't even know if the baby would've been a boy or a girl. I feel so bad calling the baby an 'it', you know?
Ann: We understand, sweetie.
Minato: So, now that the baby's gone, what do we do now?
Ann: (Sighs) Well, as much as it pains me to say it, we have to get down to brass tacks and figure out how we're going to break the news of the miscarriage to all of our friends.
Ren: Oh, that's right. I didn't even think about that. They're going to be so disappointed and heartbroken when we tell them.
Minato: Well, who do we even start with?
Ren: Well, I have to go to the Sakamotos later this afternoon to return Aunt Makoto's recipe book. I guess I'll start by telling her and Ryuji.
Ann: And I think I'll call some of the girls to see if they want to go to the spa with me later. I'll tell them there.
Minato: Auntie Futaba usually streams on Glitch (Twitch) at night. You think she could come and babysit Kimiko and me so we can talk to her about it.
Ren: Sure, we'll give her a call to see if she's available after breakfast. Speaking of which, who's down for some more comfort food? I'm thinking about chocolate waffles with strawberries and cream. What do you all think?
Ann: (Smiles warmly for the first time in almost 24 hours) Great.
The family went downstairs to help Ren cook up some breakfast. As the parents and their two children ate their breakfast at the dining room table, they discussed how they'd go about telling their respective friends. Should they bring it up first, or wait until the baby is brought up in conversation. They also tried to imagine how each of their friends would take the news. No matter how the Amamiyas sliced it, they knew that this would be a rough day for everyone.
After breakfast, the family changed out of their pajamas and got dressed into their street clothes. Ren called up Futaba to see if she wanted to watch Minato, Kimiko, and Morgana while he and Ann were out for the afternoon, to which she happily agreed. Before hanging up with her, however, Ren warned Futaba about Ann's miscarriage, and he could practically hear her face drop when he told her that. She apologized for the misfortune and told Ren that she'd be a shoulder to cry on if their children needed it. Ren thanked Futaba for her assistance before hanging up.
The afternoon came and Futaba was at the Amamiya's front door. Ren let the gamer girl in, told her what time he and Ann would be back and where they'd be, and showed her what food she can cook up for the kids and Morgana if they get hungry. Ren and Ann gave their kids a hug, telling them to be good for Futaba, and they gave Morgana a head pat before heading out to share the bad news with their friends.
When Ren made it to the Sakamoto Residence, he walked up to the front door with Makoto's recipe book in hand, and he knocked three times causing Makoto herself to answer.
Makoto: Ren, what are you doing here?
Ren: I just wanted to return your recipe book. (Hands the book to her) But I'm also here so I can talk to you, Ryuji, and Himari. Can I come in?
Makoto: Of course, you're always welcome. You came at a good time too, I just took a cake out of the oven.
Makoto lets Ren into her house and he follows her into their dining room where Ryuji and Himari were already eating their slices of cake and sipping on milk to wash it down. Makoto enters the dining room with Ren not far behind.
Ryuji: Hey, Ren, what's going on?
Himari: Hi, Uncle Ren!
Ren: Hey, Ryuji. Hey, Himari. Great to see you two.
Ryuji: Come take a seat, bud. Makoto just baked this cake, and it's to die for!
Ren: (Frowns a little when Ryuji says, 'die,' but the Sakamotos don't seem to notice) Yeah…I've heard.
Makoto: Come take a seat here and I'll cut you a piece.
Ren: Thanks.
Ren takes a seat next to Ryuji and Makoto cuts him a piece of cake. The raven haired man takes a bite and even he can't help but smile a little bit.
Ren: Wow, Makoto, this really is delicious!
Makoto: I knew you'd like it.
Himari: So, Uncle Ren, what brings you here?
Ren: I just had to return your mom's recipe book…and I also wanted to talk to you guys.
The second part of that statement he said with a hint of dread in his voice.
Ryuji: What's wrong, Ren?
Himari: Are things going okay with you and Auntie Ann?
Ren: Not especially. We, uh…something happened yesterday that really threw a wrench in our plans…involving the baby.
The Sakamotos look at him concerned. They had an idea on where this conversation was heading, and they were hoping that their assumptions were wrong.
Ryuji: Ren…did…did you and Ann…
Ren: (Closing his eyes with remorse) Yes, Ryuji…We lost the baby.
The family of three were absolutely speechless, and they had their own sorrowful reactions to the news. Makoto put her hands against her mouth as she started to tear up. Himari gave the cutest, but most heartbreaking, 'sad eyes' you will ever see. Ryuji's eyes widened in shock before his face contorted into a look of absolute sorrow.
Makoto: Oh no, Ren. We're so sorry. Nobody should ever have to go through that.
Ren: Thanks Makoto. I imagine this news is especially upsetting to you because you were the godmother and all that, but…
Makoto: I don't care about that! What about you guys? Are you okay? How is Ann taking this?
Ren: Ann and I pretty much spent most of last night crying.
Ryuji: And what about Minato, Kimiko, and Morgana?
Ren: Morgana was pretty sad, but nowhere near as sad as our kids. We had to comfort them a good amount yesterday. They were so excited for the new baby to arrive, and it killed us deep down to have to tell them what had happened.
Makoto: I can only imagine.
Himari: Uncle Ren, I'm sorry you're going through what you're going through right now. From what I heard, miscarriages aren't easy.
Ren looked at the Sakamoto child quizzically. How does a girl of mere nine years old know about miscarriages, when his ten year old son didn't.
Ren: How do you know about miscarriages, Himari?
Himari: My teacher, Mrs. Takahashi, she had one. I stayed after school one day a few months ago to get some help on my homework, and I noticed she was wearing a jeweled necklace with a name on it. It read 'Junpei'.
Ren listened intently as Himari talked.
Himari: At first I thought Junpei was her husband's name, so that's when I asked her who Junpei was. When I did that, she looked really sad. I asked what was wrong and she said that Junpei was her son's name…and she lost him before he was even born.
Ryuji: Oh yeah, I remember that story. After that day you came home asking your mom and me how a baby can be lost before it was even born. That's when we told you about miscarriages, what they mean, and what happens that causes them.
Makoto: (Turns to Ren) Sounds like Ann isn't alone. These things happen and they're more common than either of you think.
Ren: Yeah, I know. We just didn't know anyone in our group of friends who went through what we're going through right now.
Makoto: Sometimes you have to branch out and search for people outside your comfort zone to talk to.
Himari: From what I heard, Mrs. Takahashi is part of a counseling group on Wednesdays that deals with parents who lost their babies through miscarriage. Maybe you and Auntie Ann can attend one of these meetings and make some new friends in the process.
Ren: That sounds great, Himari, thank you. And, what's that you said about jewelry?
Himari: Mrs. Takahashi got a necklace with her son's name on it.
Makoto: It's always a great idea to name your child if you miscarry. You know, as a way to memorialize him/her. And what better way to remember that name than by having it in a piece of jewelry that you could wear forever.
Ren: (Thinks for a bit) That's actually a really good idea. Ann and I will brainstorm some name ideas and I'll look into getting a necklace like that for Ann. I'm sure she'll like it.
Makoto: If it's a gift from you and your heart, she definitely will. And if there's anything we can do for you in this trying time, just let us know.
Ren: (Smiles) Thanks, Makoto. That really means a lot.
And with that, The Sakamotos and Ren, who had just been given a good idea to honor the death of his unborn child, went back to eating their cake. When Ren finished his cake he talked with the family some more before making his leave, but not before Makoto told him that she'd make him and his family some home cooked meals to take home in case they didn't feel like cooking in light of the circumstances.
Meanwhile, at the local spa, Ann was with Shiho, Sumire, and Haru in the hot springs, enjoying the warm water as it worked wonders on their skin and muscles. Ann's friends seemed to be enjoying the hot spring more than her however, as the blonde woman was once again lost in thought, trying to figure out how to tell the three women with her about her miscarriage.
Sumire: Thanks for inviting us to the spa with you, Ann. It's been so long since I got to enjoy a hot spring like this.
Shiho: Yeah. Life has gotten all of us pretty busy since our high school days.
Haru: Hey, girls, what do you say after this we go to the buffet for some lunch.
Shiho: I could eat. (Turns to Ann) What do you think, Ann?
Ann: Hmm? Oh, sure, whatever.
Her three friends started to look a little concerned. They were expecting her to answer with a bit more enthusiasm rather than indifference. They watched as Ann stared at her reflection in the water, and they weren't sure what to make of this.
Haru: You're awfully quiet today, Ann? Are you okay? (Realizes something) Wait a minute, aren't you pregnant? Hot water like this isn't good for your baby.
Ann: That's actually why I wanted to talk to you three. You see, yesterday while I was taking a shower, I noticed that I started to bleed down there.
The three women gasp in a mixture of sadness and shock, and they know what's coming next.
Haru: (With her hand over her heart) Oh, Ann, say it isn't so.
Ann: Yeah, Ren and I went to Takemi's Clinic yesterday and…that's where we lost the baby.
Sumire: (Becomes saddened, as does Haru and Shiho) Oh, Ann…
Haru: Why didn't you say something sooner?
Ann: You three just looked so happy to have a 'girls' day out' that I was hesitant to break it to you all. I didn't want to bring your mood down, but I knew that sooner or later I'd have to.
Shiho: You shouldn't have to worry about bringing our mood down. You're our best friend, Ann. You matter to us more than anything. If something is wrong, like, truly, deeply wrong, you should never be afraid to tell us.
Haru: (Sighs) I just feel awful. I should've known something was wrong when you called on the phone earlier. You just didn't sound like yourself. I don't know why I didn't think something was up. I'm sorry, Ann.
Ann: It's not your fault, Haru. Don't worry.
Sumire: How were Ren and the kids taking this loss?
Ann: They were all very disappointed and upset. I think yesterday was the most either of us have cried in a long time.
Sumire, Haru, and Shiho looked down into the hot spring water remorsefully, mourning the loss of the 'Amamiya Child That Never Was.'
Ann: The only thing I could think of that's actually worse than losing a child like that, is the fact that I just feel completely alone. (Begins to get emotional) I know I have you guys, and Ren, and Morgana, and my kids…but I don't know anyone else who had a miscarriage, so I have no one I can relate to to really help me through this ordeal. I just don't know what to do…and I feel like nothing is going to be okay ever again.
Ann's three friends watched with tearful expressions as their best friend sobbed in the hot springs, her own tears dripping off of her face and mixing with the warm water below. Wanting to calm her friend down, Shiho sat next to Ann and wrapped an arm around her shoulder.
Shiho: Things will be okay again, Ann. You're a strong, smart, beautiful, independent woman with an amazing network of friends and loved ones who are ready to support you no matter what the circumstance may be. You're one of the most important people in all of our lives, Ann. We just hate to see you so upset, and we'd do anything to see you smile again.
Shiho gives Ann a hug, and that calms the blonde woman's cries a little bit.
Shiho: Did I ever tell you that I was supposed to have an older sibling?
Ann: No.
Shiho: It's a story my family doesn't like to tell often, but I figured I'd tell this story to you to tell you that you're not alone in this type of struggle, and miscarriages are more common than you think.
Shiho clears her throat as she begins to talk.
Shiho: This happened, like, three years before I was born. When my parents learned that they were pregnant with my 'would've been' sibling, they were just so happy. They got to work on the nursery, bought the baby's wardrobe and toys, and everything.
Ann: That sounds like what Ren and I did for this baby.
Shiho: (Nods) Mmm-hmm. But one day, they went for an ultrasound…and the doctor couldn't find a heartbeat. My older sibling died before it had a chance to even start living. My parents were just so crushed, especially my mother. She entered a depression and didn't come out of it until she and my dad went to therapy to try and fix things. The therapist gave some interesting advice that helped give them closure on the whole ordeal. Do you remember that tree from the courtyard of my childhood apartment complex? The one with the pink and blue ribbon tied to it?
Ann: Oh yeah! I've always wondered why that tree had that ribbon tied around it. What about it?
Shiho: Our landlord allowed my parents to plant that tree in the courtyard as a way to memorialize and honor my older sibling and provide them with some kind of closure.
Ann: Are you saying I should plant a tree in my backyard, Shiho?
Shiho: It wouldn't hurt. Like I said it's a great way to give closure, honor your baby, and help it'll help the environment to boot.
Ann: Shiho…I think that's a great idea. I'll see if Ren and the kids want to do something like that.
Shiho: I'm sure they'll agree if you tell them.
Ann: Thanks, Shiho. You really are a great friend.
Shiho and Ann hug again, and Haru and Sumire, touched by the girls' friendship, joined in for a group hug. This hug lasted a few seconds before Ann realized that they were all naked and she started to feel a tad bit awkward.
Ann: Not that I'm complaining…but this is starting to get a little weird.
The three girls back away from her, blushing with embarrassment.
Sumire: Sorry about that.
Ann: (Smiles and chuckles) It's fine. Thanks for everything, girls.
Haru: You're so welcome, Ann. And if there's anything you, Ren, Morgana, Minato, or Kimiko need during this time don't be afraid to ask.
Ann: Thank you, Haru.
Feeling all of the love her friends had to offer her, Ann continued soaking in the hot spring with them before leaving for the buffet a half hour later.
And finally, there's Minato, Kimiko, Morgana, and Futaba.
Back at the Amamiya Residence, Futaba is playing co-op mode in 'Hoover's Return to Wishworld' (Kirby's Return to Dreamland) with Minato and Kimiko while Morgana sits on the floor next to them and watches. The three of them had just beaten a boss when the two Amamiya Children's stomachs start to rumble.
Futaba: Sounds like you kids are getting hungry.
Minato: Yeah. Morgana should probably eat something too.
Futaba: Well for you kids, your dad told me there was some leftover pizza from last night we can heat up. (Looks at Morgana) And I believe he also said that there was some fatty tuna for you, Morgana.
Hearing that made Morgana's mouth water.
Morgana: Oh, you know me so well!
The gamer woman prepared the cat and two children's respective meals, and when they were all ready they sat down at the dining room table to eat (The kids anyway, Morgana ate his fatty tuna from his cat bowl next to the table). Futaba watched as everyone ate their food with smiles on their faces.
Kimiko: Don't you want something to eat, Auntie Futaba?
Futaba: No, I had a bite to eat on the way over here. (Continues watching everyone eat) But you all seem happy.
Minato: I wouldn't exactly say, 'happy.' I'm sure dad told you about…what had happened.
Futaba: Yeah, he did. I'm sorry you guys are going through something like this.
Minato: Yeah, thanks.
Kimiko: I was so excited to become a big sister too. It just isn't fair.
Minato: I know. Before the baby could even walk, talk, or…do much of anything (Snaps his fingers) That's it, show's over before it even began. We didn't even know if the baby was going to be a boy or a girl. I mean, how unfair can life really be?
Futaba: Yeah, kids, I know how unfair life can be sometimes. But unfortunately, there's not much we can do about it. That's just the hand we're dealt.
Kimiko: But more than that, we can't believe how our mom and dad took this loss. I know it's sad and all, but I've never seen them that upset before.
Futaba: I can imagine it's especially devastating for you mother since she was the one carrying the baby inside of her.
Minato: She looked pretty devastated when we came home yesterday. She was wrapped up in a blanket on the couch and she looked like she wanted to disappear. I feel terrible for her. What do you think we should do, Auntie Futaba?
Futaba: I may not know a lot about miscarriages, but I know if I were in you guys' shoes, I'd give her the biggest hug I could muster the moment she walks through the front door and tell her how much she means to me, and tell her how great of a person she is. Just shower her with unconditional affection. I think that's all your mother needs right now, the love and support of the people who are closest to her.
Kimiko and Minato look at each other and nod.
Minato: Alright, Auntie Futaba, we'll do that. But I still feel like we should do something to honor the baby. Like, we can't just let this death go by without doing something.
Kimiko: Auntie Futaba, do you have any ideas?
Futaba: I might have one.
Futaba takes her phone out from her pocket, and she shows the two of them a picture. The people in the picture were Futaba, Yuuki, their twins Riku and Mai, along with another couple and their daughter. The woman in the picture had shoulder length black hair and she looked to be about 5'3''. Her husband was a man with medium length brown hair and glasses who appeared to be about 5'10''. And the daughter looked to be about the same age as Himari (So about 9), and she had her father's brown hair tied up in a ponytail. The seven of them appear to be at a civic center for a video game convention.
Minato: Who's that family with you guys?
Futaba: Those are our friends, Fuyuko, Benjiro, and Chiyoko Yamamoto. But you probably know them as YamamotoFamilyGaming on Glitch.
Minato: I've got to be honest, I haven't heard of them until now, but I'll have to check them out. (Hands Futaba back her phone)
Kimiko: Why are you showing us this picture?
Futaba: Because the Yamamotos are one of many families in this world who went through a miscarriage. It happened a year before this picture was taken. Fuyuko and Benjiro were ready to give Chiyoko a little brother or sister, the bun was in the oven and everything. But, twelve weeks in, Fuyuko experienced cramps worse than anything she had ever imagined. They went to the hospital where they confirmed the loss of their baby. Naturally, they got super depressed, but they knew they needed to do something to honor the baby. That's why they went out and bought this.
Futaba hands the two children back her phone to show a picture from the previous year. It was a picture of a memorial plaque in the shape of a heart that read, 'Planted on Earth to Bloom in Heaven - Rest in Peace, Izumi.'
Minato: They named the baby Izumi?
Kimiko: That's so cute.
Futaba: It is. They thought that naming the baby would be a good way to give themselves closure on the whole thing. They sealed the deal by making this plaque and hanging it on the wall so they can honor Izumi for the rest of their days. I think your parents could use something similar.
Minato: I think that's a great idea, Auntie Futaba. Do you think they'll go for it?
Futaba: If we tell them what I had just told you, I'm sure they will.
Minato: (Looks over at Kimiko) We really should do something like that. We owe it to the baby.
Kimiko: Yeah…yeah we do.
Minato: Come on, Kim, let's finish up this pizza so we can get back to our game.
Futaba: Oh, I like the sound of that!
The two kids finished up their pizza and before they knew it, they were back to playing their game with Futaba, a great idea on how to memorialize their miscarried sibling dancing around in their minds.
Nightfall came and the Amamiya Family has reunited after sharing news of the miscarriage with their friends. They sat at the dining room table eating the homemade mac and cheese and fried chicken that Makoto made for them. As they ate, they all brought up the advice that their friends gave in regards to having closure on this dark chapter of their lives; the naming, the jewelry, the tree planting, and the plaque.
Neither of them could decide which option would be best, so they decided to do all of them.
First, the family got together to brainstorm ideas for a unisex name. After going through multiple ideas, they eventually settled on the name 'Hikari,' meaning light. Once a name was decided, they bought a beautiful plaque, and customized it to their liking. When everyone else went to be, Ren stayed up and bought Ann a 'Hikari' name plate necklace with garnet gemstones on it to remember the month the baby would've been born.
Ren ordered for express delivery and it came a few days later, along with the plaque. When Ann was presented with the necklace she gave her husband a hug and thanked him for the gift, saying that it was beautiful.
Ren also managed to convince him and Ann to go to the miscarriage counseling meetings that Himari talked about. They attended the next meeting and they were welcomed by everyone, including Mrs. Takahashi. Ren and Ann felt like they could be open with this support group and they could tell them everything about how they were feeling about their miscarriage. They knew that after leaving that meeting they'd be back for many more, and might even make some new friends there.
The last thing that they needed was a tree to plant. So, the day before a memorial service that the Amamiyas had planned for Hikari, they went to the local plant nursery and picked out a beautiful tree that would look great in their backyard. Once they bought the tree, Ren went ahead and planted it somewhere where where there was plenty of sunlight so it would grow beautifully.
With all of the proper steps taken, the family was ready for a beautiful memorial service.
It was another Saturday when crowds of all of the Amamiya Family's loved ones gathered in their backyard to honor the loss of Hikari Amamiya, the child that never was.
In attendance for this service, other than the obvious Amamiyas, were Ryuji, Makoto, Sae, Himari, Futaba, Yuuki, Riku, Mei, Sojiro, Shiho and Daisuke Watanabe and their two kids Nariko and Kaito, Daisuke's cousin Ryuta, Hifumi and Hayato Yajima and their son Hotaru, Sumire and Ichiro Tanaka and their daughter Kas, Haru and Yusuke Kitagawa and their twin girls Mitsu and Mana, Tae Takemi, Chihaya Mifune, Naoya Makigami, Munehisa Iwai and his son Kaoru, Shinya Oda, Ichiko Ohoya, Eiko Takao, Sadayo Kawakami and Yamato Hashimoto, Zenkichi Hasegawa and his daughter Akane, all of Ren and Ann's co-workers from the respective professions, and even The Yamamoto Family Futaba had mentioned to Kimiko and Minato, Shiho's mother, and Himari's teacher Mrs. Takahashi and all the other members from her miscarriage counseling group.
To say this was a huge turn out would've been the understatement of the millennium.
(Music: Song of Rebirth/Resurrection from Klonoa: Door to Phantomile)
Everyone gathered around the tree Ren had planted as Ann stood in front of it, facing the audience before her, prepared to say a few words.
Ann: These last couple of weeks, I'm going to be honest, have been really hard. Probably the hardest days I've ever had or ever will have. Like, I didn't know what true pain was until I lost our baby, Hikari, in the manner that I did. Words couldn't even begin to describe how I was feeling at that moment. I questioned if it was something I did or if there was something wrong with me that caused this to happen. But fortunately, I have all of you to remind me that I'm not damaged and the loss of Hikari was nobody's fault. I just want to say that I feel truly blessed to have people like you as my closest friends, and even more blessed to have Ren as my husband and two beautiful children, Minato and Kimiko, to support me even further during this hard time.
Morgana: Hey, what about me?
Ren: Shhh!
Ann: I know as I continue on this wild ride we call life, I'll have all of you to help me back on my feet. While I can say with confidence I can move on with my life after this whole episode, I'll also fully admit that I'm still going to miss my little Hikari. But I know that as long as I have this tree to remind me that Hikari was once here, inside of me, and I can watch it grow into something beautiful…I just know that everything will be okay.
Ann looks up to the sky, a single tear rolling down her cheek.
Ann: Hikari, wherever you are, I know you're somewhere safe, and somewhere where you can hear me. Just know that you'll always live in my heart, your dad's heart, your brother and sister's hearts, your pet's heart…all of our hearts. I love you sweetheart, and I know that we'll get to meet each other face to face one day if the fates allow.
And with that, Ann went back to her family. The Amamiyas, one by one, grabbed something to leave near the tree, in the same manner one would leave flowers at a gravesite.
(End Music)
Minato and Kimiko both had the rabbit and cat plushies that they bought.
Morgana, with the help of Ren and Ann, had made a 'paw-painting' of a heart that his owners later laminated and framed. Basically, to make the painting, Ren had painted Morgana's paw so the cat could press it against the paper and arrange the prints in a heart shape.
Ren had the plaque that he had bought.
Ann had a pink and blue ribbon to tie around the tree in one hand, and Makoto's mobile in the other.
Ann looked over and nodded at Hayato, who had a guitar with him, so he could play a song while she and her family placed their gifts at the tree. Hayato tuned his guitar up before playing 'Gone Too Soon' by Tawdry (Daughtry).
Hayato (Singing): Today could've been the day that you blow out your candles. Make a wish as you closed your eyes. Today could have been the day everybody was laughing. Instead I just sit here and cry.
As Hayato sang the first verse, Minato and Kimiko placed down their plushies in front of the tree. Morgana placed his heart 'paw-painting' in between the two stuffed toys.
Hayato (Singing): Who would you be? What would you look like when you looked at me for the very first time? Today could have been the next day of the rest of your life.
As Hayato sang the pre-chorus, Ren put down the plaque that he had bought. The plaque, like the Yamamotos, was heart-shaped, but this one read, 'You were carried for only a moment. But you're loved for a lifetime - Rest in Peace, Hikari.'
Hayato (Singing): Not a day goes by that I don't think of you. I'm always asking why this crazy world had to lose such a ray of light we never knew. Gone too soon. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
As Hayato sang the chorus, Ann hung up Makoto's mobile on the tree's strongest branch before tying the pink and blue ribbon around its thin trunk.
With their gifts placed in front of or upon the tree, Ann, Ren, Minato, Kimiko, and Morgana look upon it in a group hug. Just about everyone at the memorial becomes teary-eyed and is hugging somebody as Hayato sings the final chorus.
Hayato (Singing): Not a day goes by that I don't think of you. I'm always asking why this crazy world had to lose such a beautiful light we never knew. Gone too soon. You were gone too soon….Not a day goes by. That I don't think of you.
When all was said and done, it was a beautiful memorial service. Not a single eye left the Amamiya's backyard dry that day.
The following weekend, Ann and Ren had no plans, and Minato and Kimiko had no homework to speak of. Still feeling a little stuck in the doldrums after the miscarriage and memorial service, Ann had the brilliant idea for her and the rest of the family to just get out of the house for the weekend and do something fun. So, the family packed their bags, got Morgana in his travel crate, and they headed out to Miura Beach.
That whole Saturday the five Amamiyas had fun at the beach. Kimiko, Minato, and Morgana built a sandcastle, Ann got to work on her tan, Morgana got to take a nap on a beach blanket and take in the sunlight, Ren and Minato tossed a frisbee around, Kimiko collected seashells, and of course everyone got a chance to play around in the ocean. It was the first time since before Hikari's miscarriage that the Amamiya Family was truly happy.
When the sun went down, the Amamiyas checked in at the hotel they'd be staying at for the night and retired to the room they reserved. They got into their pajamas, ordered room service, and enjoyed a movie together. When the movie was over, Ann looked outside from the balcony and saw a full moon in the sky.
Ann: Come on, let's go stargazing.
Ann's husband, children, and Morgana followed her out to the balcony where the five of them just stared up at the moon and the stars.
Ren: It really is a beautiful night tonight, isn't it? (Puts an arm around Ann)
Ann: Yeah, it really is.
Kimiko: Do you guys think Hikari is somewhere out there looking down at us with a smile?
Ren: Think so? I know so. (Looks over at Ann and kisses her cheek) How are you doing, hon?
Ann: I'm feeling much better than I have been these last couple of days. But the hurt from the loss is still there, if only a little bit of it.
Ren: Yeah, I know. I miss our baby too.
Minato: I still feel a little sad thinking about Hikari too, if I'm being honest.
Kimiko and Morgana nod in agreement.
Ann: Yeah, I know. The loss of Hikari is one that I know won't be going away anytime soon, but we all have to make an effort to move on, no matter how much it hurts. I know that's what Hikari would want us to do.
Ren: You're right. Hikari would want us to live our best, and happiest lives. We owe it to him to make him proud.
Kimiko: Or her.
Ren: (Smiles at his daughter) Yeah, or her.
Ann: And I just know that as long as the five of us love and support each other through all of life's trials and tribulations, we can achieve our best possible lives. We'll do it all for Hikari.
Ren, Minato, Kimiko, and Morgana: For Hikari.
The family all hug Ann and she smiles while letting another tear fall from her eye, feeling nothing but love course through her veins.
Ann: I love you guys.
The four other Amamiyas spoke up in unison.
Ren: We love you too, Ann.
Minato and Kimiko: We love you too, mom.
Morgana: We love you too, Lady Ann.
The loss of Hikari was undoubtedly the hardest thing the Amamiya family had to deal with so far. But like with any other obstacle they've faced, they faced it together, had a network of friends to lean on when necessary, and they vowed to do everything in their power to move forward and become better people because of the hardship.
And above all, they knew that no matter how harsh life becomes, or how hopeless a situation may seem, they will always have each other, and that is a very comforting thought indeed.
THE END