Chapter 8 - Nautical Nonsense

Author's note: Hi readers! Once again, I'm terribly sorry the wait was longer than expected. Since this is a rewrite and not a simple copy-and-paste from the original story I wrote as a kid, I had lots of trouble coming up with SpongeBob's lines since I haven't watched an episode of SpongeBob SquarePants in who knows how long. On the plus side, my inspiration is back, and I am determined to make it to the end of the story (and the maze) since all the upcoming events and boss battles have obviously been written out long ago. It doesn't seem like I've received any reviews for the last chapter, so on with the story!

Upon entering the next area, called Cartoon World, we were transported into the middle of a museum with brightly-colored walls, and lots of TV screens and comic strips all around that displayed just about every cartoon in existence. Bugs Bunny, Scooby-Doo, The Simpsons, Family Guy, the 1960's Batman cartoon, yep, they had it all. Some of the cartoon characters seemed to run from one screen to another, such as Donald Duck when he accidentally wandered into Daffy Duck's territory. Try imagining what happened from there!

For once, Sonic was walking slowly as we took in all the sights. He suddenly stopped and pointed at one of the TV's. We all watched as Scratch and Grounder, two of his minions, were caught eavesdropping on Dr. Robotnik's conversation.

"Snooping as usual, I see!" Dr. Robotnik glared, and then the TV went black.

So that's where "pingas" comes from, I thought, chuckling silently.

After watching some more clips of classic cartoons, we reached a door that automatically opened to reveal a movie theater, displaying an image of a tropical island. Suddenly, a pirate appeared on the screen.

"Are ya ready, kids?" the pirate asked.

I squealed with delight. Oh my gosh, is this who I think it is?

"AYE-AYE, CAPTAIN!" I shouted as loudly as I possibly could.

"I can't hear yoooou!" the pirate said.

"AYE-AYE, CAPTAIN!"

"Ohhhhh! Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?" the pirate sang as a very familiar-looking pineapple appeared on the screen.

"SpongeBob SquarePants!" I cheerily replied as my favorite cartoon character of all time made his presence known, in all his 2D hand-drawn glory. I sang along with the rest of the theme song with all my being, and once it was done, there was a bright flash of light and a loud bang. Once the smoke cleared, I could not believe my eyes. Standing right in front of me was SpongeBob SquarePants himself; living, breathing, fully three-dimensional, and about my size (which was ginormous for him).

"Wow! I cannot believe you're here! You're, like, my favorite cartoon character of all time!" I gushed as the fanboy in me couldn't restrain himself. "I...hope I'm not being too enthusiastic."

"Aw, no worries!" SpongeBob replied in his distinctive voice. "You're just like me every time I meet my two favorite superheroes in the entire sea, Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy!"

"Speaking of them, how are they?" I wondered. "Last time I saw them, you were in the Mermalair helping to defeat Plankton's robots."

"Well, their TV has been repaired, and they're up to date with their medications and foot massages, so I'd say they're doing juuuuuuust fine!"

"Uh, SpongeBob?" I asked as something came to my mind.

"Yes?"

"How is it that you're alive when you're out of the water?" I inquired. "I mean, shouldn't you have dried up by now? You dried up last time you were in Sandy's tree dome."

"This is a dream," the yellow sea sponge replied. "In dreams, anything is possible! For example, watch me as I dream myself up a moustache!" SpongeBob closed his eyes and clenched his fists, as if concentrating deeply, and a thick, black moustache suddenly sprouted from his upper lip.

"Wow, way to go!" I applauded, clapping my hands.

"Uh, guys," Tails said, "we still have a maze to get through, you know."

"Then let's get going everyone!" I said with a grin.

"Okay!" Sonic, Tails, Knuckles, and SpongeBob all replied at the same time. We arrived at the next door, and strangely, there was no key nearby. A gigantic, illuminated purple sign above it read, "BOSS FACTORY # 1".

"Well, here we go," I said, reaching out for the doorknob. I was expecting it to be locked (and then expecting to search all around for the key afterwards), so it came as a real surprise when the doorknob turned with no effort. The door opened, and we walked inside the Boss Factory.

The Boss Factory (or rather, the first one) was very similar to the Monster Factory that I visited earlier. The sounds of machinery huffing and puffing, the smell of oil, and the sight of white-hot steam shooting out of narrow copper pipes overwhelmed my senses. A metal sign in front of me read "Welcome to Boss Factory # 1!"

"Boss Factory # 1?" I wondered aloud. "Why not just Boss Factory? Does that mean there will be a Boss Factory # 2? Or 3? Or 4? Or 1,456,436,784,294,793,790,239,345?" But before anyone could reply, there was a quiet buzzing sound that quickly became louder and louder...

"AHHH!" Tails cried in terror as something flew right by us at a very fast speed. "What is that thing?"

I could not believe my eyes. A gigantic mutant mosquito, as big as a school bus, was flying erratically around the area.

"Just leave it to us!" Sonic and Knuckles said. In a mad blur of spin dashes, homing attacks, and ground-shaking punches, the giant insect was defeated. The mosquito's proboscis pointed straight up into the air like a spear, and I could see my own reflection multiplied by hundreds in its creepy eyes.

"Well, that was way too easy," Sonic boasted as we made a beeline (or should I say mosquito-line?) for the next door, and a key appeared, shimmering in midair. I reached out to take it in my outstretched hand.

"Siht si eht Noisufnoc Yek," the voice said. "Eht rood sah neeb dekcolnu."

"Uhh, English please?" I said with a tone that conveyed annoyance.

"Yrros, I tonnac pleh uoy htiw taht," the voice replied.

Tails cleared up the gibberish for me. "It said, 'This is the Confusion Key. The door has been unlocked.' Then after you asked it to speak in English, it said, 'Sorry, I cannot help you with that.' Let's go in and try not to get too confused."

"Aohw, siht si driew," I dias sa I dekool dnuora eht Moor fo Noisufnoc. Sroloc erew desrever, os tahw saw thgil deraeppa krad, dna tahw saw krad deraeppa thgil. Thgir-edis-pu saw edispu-nwod, edispu-nwod saw thgir-edis-pu, ytivarg saw desrever os ew llef sdrawpu, BoBegnops dna I dah ruo raewrednu no eht edistuo...ti saw driew. Yllufknaht, eht txen yek saw gnidih ni nialp thgis, tub eht rood ni nialp thgis saw gnidih.

"Nac't ew tsuj maerd sevlesruo attuo ereh?" I delbmurg. Suddenly, everything turned back to normal, and we arrived at the next door, where the real key shimmered into existence.

"This is the Bowling Key," the voice announced. "The door has been unlocked."

"Ooh, I love bowling!" I said, pumping my arm into the air with excitement. "Let's go in!"

Author's note: I hope you enjoyed this chapter, despite the wait! Hopefully the last segment didn't confuse you too much, but if it did, here's the text the right way around...

"Whoa, this is weird," I said as I looked around the Room of Confusion. Colors were reversed, so what was light appeared dark, and what was dark appeared light. Right-side-up was upside-down, upside-down was right-side-up, gravity was reversed so we fell upwards, SpongeBob and I had our underwear on the outside...it was weird. Thankfully, the next key was hiding in plain sight, but the door in plain sight was hiding.

"Can't we just dream ourselves outta here?" I grumbled.

Anyway, please feel free to review, and stay tuned for more! :)