A/N: God I hate House Elves
Harry glared at his Charm's book one last time before snapping it shut. It was getting boring to read the same thing over and over again trying to find what he was missing. He turned his glare to a nearby clock an groaned as he realized that woman would be here soon. Harry swept up his nearby sandwich and began nibbling. He had finally caved to Minnie's poking and taken the sandwich she had made. It was pretty good, but it was a little soured by his current predicament. Speaking of predicaments.
"Hey Minnie?" The boy called out, "What kind of escapees are there in this house?"
The house elf popped into the living and began tidying his notes into a manageable pile as she spoke, "Mistress has many experiments happenings in this house. Sometimes shes goings away on trips for works or pickings up supplies, so shes be leaving Minnine in charge of other Elves and experiments. Somes times there's be animals involved for furs are claws or talons, and theys can overpower the newer elves if theys not carefuls. Lasts weeks Nifflers bes getting out in the dungeons and making a mess of alls our shinies. Minnie have funs hunting thems for sports."
"Right." Harry pretended to ignore that last line. "Is there anything dangerous in the house I should worry about?"
The house elf nodded vigorously at that, "Of course, many things goes boom, can injure someone very much. Mistress shall explain the rules when she gets back."
"Right." Well this was getting no where other than making him terrified of stepping on a landmine or something. "She'll be back soon right? What are her normal working hours?"
"Mistress get back when mistress get back. She is very, very important to peoples and works many hours in a few days. Shes spends many hours home though, working on her experiments, studying ancient magics, or learning something new. She bes more of a consultants than a worker, only going in when needed. She be very important as I says earlier. She's always comes back though, and we house elves take care of her. Tucks her into bed when she falls asleep whens workings. Shes a very forgetful persons when it comes to herself. Needing many potions to function some days."
"sounds like a lot of work for you guys?"
"Yes, yes!" The elf clapped, "Madam's always gives us so much works, so much funs to do. We bes giving uniforms to wear instead of pillow cases. Allowed to make treats for ourselves when we do good jobs. And shes even givens permissions to do our own experiments."
That actually terrified Harry, "You do your own experiments?" She only nodded in response before popping away once more. Well if anything he was more skeptical about living in this house, but at least he knew to expect traps everywhere. He moved to stand up, but as he did flames in a fire place he hadn't know was there roared to life, and our stepped his new warden. He waited for her to say something to him, but all she did was yawn into her palm and stride right past him.
"Minnie," she called, "How's the blue room potion going? All steps followed?"
"Yes mistress," the elf popped back into existence, "All your notes is being corrects. All predictions have come true."
"Good to know, I'm going to sleep for a few, wake me in half an hour?"
"Yes mistress." Harry frowned as she made her way to the stairs at the back of the room, "Um, hello?" You're just gonna leave me here alone? He wanted to say.
She paused in her stride and turned a confused look at him, "Right , I forgot you were here."
"How reassuring."
"Watch the cheek brat. Sit down I need to lay down the ground rules." He complied with a frown as she walked over and sat in one of plush recliners. "So, first things first. If a room is locked, don't try and go in, don't jiggle the handle, and don't bang on the door. Second, if you go into an unlocked room and there's something glowing, shining, or calling out your name, turn around and leave, there's a lot of magical items in this house and I can't be bothered to lock up each and every one. Third, if you see a ghost, call a House Elf, there aren't supposed to be any spirits in this house, but every once in a while, one will appear. Sadly, I can't have my wards eject them because once in a blue moon, I do an experiment utilizing them. Fifth, no fourth, if I'm asleep don't bother me. Now its on the fifth, don't blow anything up without my permission. This house is expensive and I destroy it up enough. Also if you go outside, be wary of where you go, once you leave the wards you might not be able to come back in. Any questions?"
Harry tried to speak but she interrupted.
"No? good, a elf will be watching your every step so you don't have to worry about many of those rules, they'll tell you what you can and can't do."
"Wait!" He shouted as she moved to leave once more, "Why did the Headmaster want you to take me in? I don't know you, I've never even heard of you before. According to everyone at school you're suppose to be ancient but you look 20. I've got a lot of questions you can't just leave without answering any of them. Like why-"
"Fine I'll answer one of them at least, the rest can wait til later. The reason Albus dumped you on me for the summer is for two reasons. One, he for some reason fears a pathetic wizard like Black, and thinks that somehow, he'll be able to penetrate the School's wards. And even though they're in complete shambles compared to what they were like in the 50s, the wards couldn't even be scratched by anyone who doesn't know a thing about warding. Second of all, I suppose Albus never told you this for some reason, but at one point for about 5 years, my last name was changed from Semenova, to Potter… little nephew of mine."