Trapper rounded the corner and pulled up short to avoid running headlong into Cody. The smile on his lips died as he took in his friend's rigid body language. Cody jammed the shave kit into Trapper's chest hard enough to push him back slightly, side-stepped around him, and continued on.

"Hey!" Trapper objected at the unprovoked harsh treatment. He spun around and hurried to match strides with Cody. "What's gotten into you?"

Cody ignored him and headed toward the turbolift, his armored boots clicking against the deck with angry precision.

Trapper hurried to match Cody's pace. "Permission to speak freely?"

"No." Cody tried to step into the turbolift doors without giving Trapper room to follow.

The ARF trooper leapt through the doors after him before the doors swished shut, determined not to be separated from Cody. He whirled on Cody as soon as the lift started its' upward descent toward the bridge. "You are no good to the 212th if you can't-"

"You're out of line! This is not up for discussion," Cody hissed angrily.

"Sir, yes, sir." Trapper bit out, his body language as stiff as his voice.

The rest of the turbolift ride passed in uncomfortable silence. Cody was fuming, but immediately found he missed Trapper's constant chatter.

# # #

The Kaz'harian bridge was very different from a Jedi cruiser. It had a large chair in the center for the commanding officer. What self-respecting commanding officer sat down when he was on duty?! Cody paced around the thing, leaned up against it, and made several rounds checking on the bridge crew. Based on the slight flickering of eyes he was seeing from the bridge crew, he was making them uneasy with his constant movements.

He sighed in defeat and sat down in the oversized chair. He stared down at his datapad to review shipwide status reports. There was a great deal for him to review as the entire crew was learning to navigate an entirely new ship design. But, he couldn't concentrate on any of it.

Distracted means dead.

It was one of the first lessons Alpha-17 had taught him during his specialized training on Kamino. Cody turned his attention back to the pad, trying to make sense of the reports so he could figure out where he needed to reassign personnel. Ko had done an outstanding job on the night shift compiling reports from around the ship.

Now, I need to turn all of this data into action items for the day shifts-

Out of the corner of his eye, he watched Trapper cross the bridge to confirm a course correction with the navigation officer. Trapper was an outstanding bridge officer.

And, he didn't deserve to be the focal point of my anger.

Cody waited until Trapper finished at the navigation station. "Trapper, meet me in the... eh..." What were they calling the oversized room off the bridge again?

"Briefing room," Trapper supplied, his voice flat and completely devoid of emotion. How was it Trapper always knew what he meant even when he stumbled over his words?

A Jedi cruiser had a Combat Information Center or an Auxiliary Information Center directly off of the bridge. But, the Kaz'harians had what looked to be a conference room. Cody had not pictured the warrior species as the type to have lengthy meetings, but they were certainly set up for them. He gazed out the impressive plexi-glass wall which dominated half the room. A slight blur of white showed their continuous progress through hyperspace back toward Coruscant.

"Reporting as ordered, Commander." Trapper stood just inside the doorway, as far away from Cody as he could get in the large conference room. The distance stung, as he was one of Cody's closest vode next to Rex. He usually only ever called Cody by his title when GAR High Command was around.

"At ease," Cody turned and waved one hand toward the dark, polished Kriin-wood table and matching chairs. "Sit."

"Thank you, sir, I'm fine over here."

Cody sighed and pushed out a long breath, already hating this formality out of Trapper. He removed his helmet and jammed a hand through his hair, before setting his helmet down on the table.

Trapper eased up slightly and tugged off his bucket, setting it down next to Cody's, before backing off again.

"You know I'm not good with words so I'll come right out and say it," Cody began. "I was angry and I took it out on you."

"You did." He stared at Cody for a long moment, before his lips curled up slightly in a smirk. "But, at least you're clone enough to admit when you're acting like a di'kut." He crossed his arms across his chest. "What happened?"

Cody closed his eyes. Barriss' rejection had cut him to the core. He did not want to discuss it. Ever. "It's not worth discussing, Trap."

"Oh, I think it is, especially since it concerns Commander Offee." It was a statement, not a question. The fact Trapper was so certain of this information was unsettling.

Cody shook his head, figuring maybe he could pull the rank card here to get Trapper to back off. "We are not discussing this... She is your superior officer. And, much as you like to constantly overlook it, I am as well."

"She went to your quarters last night... After I... eh... encouraged her to go."

"What?!"

"She was alone in the mess hall, looking lost and alone. I told her I was on my way to deliver food to your quarters and suggested she deliver it instead."

"Why would you do that?!"

"Because I saw you with her at Ord Cestus. Not many of us get the chance to experience something like that, vod. Someone like that. I don't know what it is between you, but you're different when she's around."

Cody had woken up in a good mood. No, more like an amazing mood, thinking maybe they could somehow work things out. He didn't want to think through logistics or strategy for once. For the brief couple of minutes while he was showering and shaving, he fooled himself into thinking he deserved a bit of fekkin' happiness. Then, Barriss had come knocking on his door and reality had immediately come crashing down again.

Clones were born in vats and sent to battlefields to die. And, that's fekking it. There was no room for any other kind of life.

He was such an di'kut for thinking anything else.

"I saw Commander Offee when she was on her way back to her quarters," Trapper said. "She was so upset she didn't know where she was going... I made sure she found her way. If she's upset about this and you're upset about this, then-"

Cody shook his head so vehemently it made his head spin slightly. "No. My focus in on this Legion, first and foremost. Things may have been different when I was at Ord Cestus. That time is over."

"But-"

"We are not discussing this again." He flipped on the holodisplay, ending the discussion. "Assemble the command team for strategy and review."

Trapper stared him down for a long moment and the look was so piercing Cody thought his vod was looking into his soul. But, then, Trapper nodded and walked away. "I'll assemble the team."

The aching was still there in his gut. It was a raw bitterness. And, maybe it would always be there, like a deep blaster wound which bacta couldn't quite heal.

He couldn't have Barriss. That kind of future had never been meant for him. He had a duty to the Republic.

He was a clone. He had no right to expect anything more.

# # #

Rex shucked his Kazzie fatigues. They were several sizes too big and held on with an improvised belt. But, the camo fatigues, in several shades of the Kazzie green, had been surprisingly comfortable.

He set them aside and walked across the room into the attached refresher. He was grateful the recently free Legions had something to wear other than the rags they'd been dressed in when they came onboard.

His body didn't ache when he moved. He'd healed well in the bacta. With as sore as he'd been after his fight with the Kaz'harian leader, it was a relief to move without pain again.

Rex studied the controls in the shower. The Kazzie alphabet was nothing like Aurebesh. If he chose the wrong setting, he'd scald himself.

Fek. He made it through the Battle of Darkknell, and now he is defeated by the Kazzie shower.

He was about to comm Leon for translation assistance when he noticed the flimsi next to the sink. A meticulous diagram on using the Kazzie shower, and everything else in the 'fresher had been printed out in perfect clone writing. He chuckled as he noticed some of the more imaginative details in the diagrams.

Fives.

He double-checked the diagram again and set the controls for the shower. Unusual creatures, the Kazzies. Why would they want a nozzle pointed at... He shook his head, and decided it was better if he left some mysteries unsolved.

He closed his eyes as the water ran over him and felt all his muscles relax. He sagged forward and pressed his forehead against the tile. He awoke long after the water had grown cold. Someone was knocking at the door.

"Come," he called out. "Kix, I'm sorry I had to pull you off-duty, but Fives said you weren't resting-"

"It's me, Rex."

"Ahsoka," her name came out as a hoarse whisper. He finally recovered himself, and managed to state the obvious. "I'm... eh... in the shower."

He heard a laugh come from the other side of the doorway. The one with no actual door. "Thank you, Rex. I did figure that one... Jedi intuition, you know." There was that light teasing laughter in her voice that he loved... eh... appreciated so much. Her tone changed after a moment, as if she just realized he was naked on the other side of the door. "Do you want me to leave?" Her voice suggested she did not want to go.

He hesitated. He needed to talk with her and in another day he'd be back on duty. He was so comfortable with Ahsoka it didn't seem odd to have her in his quarters.

"Rex?" Ahsoka prompted.

"Stay. I'll be out shortly."

Ahsoka laughed. "I wasn't planning on coming in." As soon as she said the words, a heavy and uncomfortable silence fell between them.

Rex shut off the water and the silence deepened.

"Fek." Rex hadn't even realized he'd said the word out loud until Ahsoka responded.

"Are you alright?"

He blew out an exasperated sigh. "Kazzies don't use towels, do they?"

"Not that we've been able to figure out. There's been a shipwide debate on the matter."

"Glad it's not just me."

He heard Ahsoka rummaging around in his room, and a moment later, a hand reached around the door, holding up his bodysuit. "You want this or those stylish Kazzie pants?"

"The bodysuit will do." He quickly shrugged into the lower half of the undersuit, feeling it pull against his wet skin. He tossed the upper half over his shoulder, meaning to put it on once he'd air-dried some more. He walked out, water still beading down off of him.

The Jedi padawan was staring at him curiously. He flushed self-consciously, noticing her intense scrutiny. He dragged a hand along his grizzled chin. "I'm sorry. I haven't had a chance to shave. My kit is loaned out."

"No," her mortals deepened in color, and she swallowed, "it's… uh… good." She looked around the room for a place to sit, and perched on the edge of the storage locker. "It's been a long time since we've had a chance to talk. Not since you shipped out to ArmyMed."

Rex sat down next to her, once again realizing how easy it was to be with Ahsoka. "So much changed for me after I was sent there."

She gently placed a hand over his, stroking the back of his hand with gently soothing circles. "Changed, how?"

Rex took a deep breath. "Our ship crashed on the way to Kamino. All I could think of in those final moments was you."

Her eyes widened and she looked like she wanted to say something. He knew what she wanted to say and they couldn't say it. Not now. Maybe not ever.

He blurted the words out before he lost the courage. "But, that doesn't change who we are. What we are."

"Rex-" she protested, gripping his hand tightly as if by doing so she never had to let him go.

"We can't be together, 'soka. We're from two different worlds. You know it and I know it. There's just no way." Rex said the final words, and knew they were the right words, but each one was more painful than anything that happened to him at Darkknell or TriLuna. The painful part was... he didn't want it to be like this... he wanted... No. It didn't matter what he wanted. They both had to do what was right. They had a duty to the Republic. Ahsoka had her duty to the Jedi.

"I... understand," Ahsoka stood up, but something in her voice said she didn't want to understand. She traced the faint scar left by the blaster mark from the Kaz'harian leader. Rex allowed the touch, shivering at the sensation and closing his eyes. How could such a light touch affect him so strongly? "Then, let us allow ourselves one night. This one night. Tonight." Ahsoka continued to brush his chest ever so slightly.

Rex shuddered and he groaned. One night. Surely he deserved one night. They deserved one night.

Yes.

One night.

She leaned in and brushed her lips against his forehead. He groaned again and leaned into her touch. Why did all of this have to feel so good? So right? "One night," Ahsoka repeated firmly, and she was so sure of herself Rex almost gave in, "it is all we will ever have. With the war-"

"No," his voice was a pained gasp, and he had no idea where he'd gotten the strength to say no. He stood up on shaking legs. "Ahsoka. If I spend the night with you, I won't…"

He couldn't finish the sentence. The words failed him.

I won't ever be able to let you go.

He stepped back further and turned his back on her, yanking his shirt over his head. He crossed over to his foot locker, grabbed his kit and suited up in record time. He needed a barrier between them. He didn't trust his body. He didn't trust himself. Not right now. Not with Ahsoka here and... "You should go... I'll... walk you back to your quarters." He wasn't sure if his voice sounded normal, but he had to say something.

There was no conversation between them as he walked her back to her quarters and he hated it. From the moment they'd met, they'd always had something to talk about.
He could still feel the imprint of her hand on his chest and her lips on his forehead. It was as if she'd branded him permanently.

She disappeared into her quarters silently. The doors swished shut and he was left alone standing in the corridor.

Losing the Andoan Legion was difficult enough, but this was even worse somehow. Like being torn up from the inside out.

And, he had yet to explain why he wasn't dead when they returned to Coruscant.

# # #