Chapter 6:

Bella

The sound of my alarm jolts my body upright. I don't remember the last time I actually slept through the night. Normally, I shut the alarm off on my phone long before the set time. The sun is peeking through the curtains, billowing gently around my window. My heart skips as I realize why the curtains are moving. The window is open, cracked just enough for the breeze to creep through.

The sudden realization brings the chess piece to the front and center of my consciousness. I've been awake for thirty seconds and adrenaline is already racing through my bloodstream. I didn't wake up from a nightmare this time, but woke up to one. The fear being real instead of imagined is infinitely worse.

My room is freezing, almost chilly enough for me to see my quickening breaths. I know I shut the window last night, just like I know there was no pawn on my dresser before I went to shower. Someone is sneaking in and out of this house. Only leaving traces because they want me to know they were here. It's a mind game, and it's definitely working. Cold sweat trickles down my temple. I have to get up and get ready to head to the coffee shop, but fear locks my muscles solid. I don't have a "fight or flight" reflex, instead I have "freeze and hope not to die."

Thinking about the stranger in the woods had been arousing last night, but this morning all I feel is unease and panic rising in my chest. I close my eyes and count to ten out loud, then open them again. I can see light, slowly brightening my room from the rising sun. I can hear the chirping birds in the tree just outside my window. I can taste the staleness of morning in my mouth. I can smell the strawberry scent of my shampoo lingering in my freshly washed hair. I can feel the softness of the sheets surrounding me. Every sense I allow myself to feel grounds me and eases the tension that a few seconds ago was threatening to take over my body. I release the breath I was holding and force myself through the motions of getting ready.

I'm still pissed at Charlie for forcing me in to this coffee shop job, but I know he means well. He remembers how easy it is for me to slip into a solitary, depressive state. When I was in high school, he saw me do nothing but stare out of my window for months. All because some dumb boy broke my heart. I understand where he's coming from, but it doesn't make me any more excited to make the trek to town and have to interact with Jessica again. Maybe she's changed and I'm not throwing myself into a room with a pit viper.

A horn blasts outside, just as I finish eating the last of my toast. I had assumed Charlie would pick me up, but when I look out the front window, it's Jacob I see. He's sitting in an orange beater of a pickup truck with a giant, goofy grin plastered on his face. It's enough for me to break into a smile of my own as I grab my backpack and head out to greet him. I forget the mysterious chess piece as I wrap my arms around his neck and press myself into the warmth of his chest. His earthy scent is a comfort that I can't describe except to say that it feels like home. Jacob's smell and touch brings back every good memory I have of Forks. It's the memories that saved me the last time I was home, when I thought my heart would be broken forever. He carefully put each piece back together the last time and he's here doing it all over again.

"You ready for this?" he smirks, pulling away from my embrace to open the truck door.

"As ready as I'm going to get," I sigh. "You think Jess has let her grudge go yet? Or am I still a home wrecker?"

"I don't know," Jacob laughs. "Are you still in love with Mike?" He draws out the 'o' sound in love, clearly mocking the situation and how absolutely ridiculous it is. He knows as well as I do that I only had my heart set on one boy in high school and he had ripped my heart out.

The rain started coming down just after we turned off the long dirt driveway on to the highway. I have at least twenty minutes to build myself up to a full-blown panic before we make it to the coffee shop. Five minutes in, Jacob must notice my rising respiration rate and places his hand over my thigh, caressing his thumb across my leg gently. I focus on the motion and take deep breaths. It's so comfortable with him, so easy. The thought of something more with us crosses my mind. I know Charlie would be thrilled. He and Jacob's dad have been best friends since before I was born. But I also can't get the man in the woods out of my mind.

My mind is racing as fast as my heart. I'm quickly filling with dread and anxiety again over Jacob, Jessica, and my mystery man. Jacob's soft caress turns into a tightening grip.

"Bella," he growls. There's an animalistic tone to it I don't recognize as his, but it snaps me out of my spiral.

"Sorry," I whisper, looking at him with glassy eyes that are threatening to spill over with tears at any moment. "I just lost myself for a minute."

"Never apologize for needing a moment, Bella." He whispers back. The edge to his voice gone. "I just wanted to remind you I'm right here."

My breath catches in my throat at his words. I didn't know I needed to hear them until after he said them. "Tha…thanks," I whisper. Closing my eyes to will the tears forming in them to recede.

His hand that rests on my thigh reaches up and gently strokes my cheek before returning to the steering wheel. His words and touch send a wave of relief through me, easing all the tension built up in the muscles I've kept wound tight.

I can do this. I can get through a six-hour shift in any hellhole that might wait for me. The mantra gets me through the ten minutes it takes to arrive at a parking spot out in front of the little cafe I'm now an employee of.

Jacob's classic goofy grin reappears, and he beams at me. "Let's do this, loca."