bulgaria runs away, crying, and eventually finds himself in some dark room. idk which room it is but there's no light and there aren't any people maybe it's some locker room or the bathroom or the room with the cleaning appliances idk it's just small and dark and people-less.

he closes the door, collapses on the floor and buries his face in his knees, sobbing and sobbing. why? why does he have to be such a fucc-up? why does he have to ruin everything? now all of his friends hate him. he messed up their doings. he ruined their fun, their ambitions. he's lonely and undeserving of love.

but then, a FWOOOOOSH is heard. purple flash. a familiar phosphorescent ghost is standing besides him. then, the ghost squats next to him.

'hey... son?'

old great bulgaria doesn't look down on his son. he doesn't judge him for being weak. he doesn't feel disgust, contempt or the desire to disown him for not being the way he wants him to be. he's simply confused with his son's emotions, as they aren't familiar to him, and wants to help him become strong, independent, smug, self-sufficient and apathetic towards others' rejection and rude behavior.

'...dad? w-what are you doing here? I thought that 150 days have to pass before you can appear again...'

'remember that book you and your buddies used to summon me? well it got sucked into the closing portal along with me. I'm smart enough to do the spell and open up the gateway between our realms although it has a cooldown time of several days. so now tell me, what's the problem? what's making u so upset?'

'well... where do I start... all I want is to have fun and make others have fun and overall have a great time... but I mess up everything... even when I'm not even trying to joke... I ruined everything for everyone... and now, nobody wants to be my friend anymore...'

'WELL FUCC THEM FOR MAKING U FEEL THAT WAY. LIKE WHAT DO U EVEN NEED THEM FOR? FOOD, WATER, CLOTHES, A PLACE TO SLEEP? U DON'T DEPEND ON THEM FOR THIS STUFF, SO WHY DO U CARE? THEY PUNCH U, TRY TO DROWN U, REJECT U, ACT RUDE TO U AND DON'T DEFEND U FROM THAT MISERABLE HEADMASTER! U DON'T NEED THEM! ALL U GOTTA THINK ABOUT IS URSELF! U GOTTA CARE ABOUT URSELF THE MOST! OTHER PEOPLE GOTTA BE NOTHING MORE THAN ACCESSORIES TO U! IF THEY DON'T WANT U AROUND, THEIR LOSS LOL'

bulgaria looks at his dad, confused. old great bulgaria is confused at his son, too. how on earth do shame, anxiety, guilt, fear, the desire to be around others and rejection feel? he doesn't know but he's also glad he doesn't know, seeing how hurt and weak they make people.

'WELL WHAT'S THE PROBLEM? IS IT THAT U BASE UR SELF-ESTEEM ON HOW MUCH THEY LIKE U? THATS SO LAME OMG. ALL THE LOVE U NEED IS THE ONE U HAVE FOR URSELF. IF U RELY ON OTHERS' LOVE FOR U U'LL BE DEPENDENT ON THEM AND U'LL SUFFER. BUT IF U RLLY LOVE URSELF, THEN WHAT OTHERS THINK ABOUT U DOESN'T MATTER. SO PLS TELL ME: WHY DO U CARE ABOUT ALL OF THAT? I'M NOT BLAMING U, I JUST GENUINELY WANNA KNOW SO I CAN GIVE U EFFECTIVE ADVICE THAT WILL HELP U.'

too bad someone like old great bulgaria doesn't understand that people don't always need help or advice, sometimes they need emotional comfort.

bulgaria buries his face into his dad's kaftan - it feels the same like it did over 1300 years ago. old great bulgaria is confused again. but he knows his son's emotions are important, even though they're unfamiliar to him. and he knows that pushing him away won't help him but will make him more upset. so he starts rubbing his son's back between the shoulder blades. yeah the tears seeping through the fabric feel unpleasant. so does bulgaria's hug. it's too tight but that's a good thing cuz it means his son is strong.

'but how? how do I stop caring about others? and not caring about them seems so cruel! how do I stop wanting to feel liked? how do I get self-absorbed? how do I stop caring about what people say about me or to me?'

'well uuuh- ' old great bulgaria takes a deep breath. 'I DUNNO. I've been like that ever since I remember. idk how u could become like me if u've never been like me, not even in ur childhood. but maybe u should start small. like start ur own yogurt appreciation club. oh wait that's a superficial thing. not something that will change the way u feel... but maybe once u have ur own club, u won't feel the need to get into others' clubs... just think about it. ur the only one in this school who loves yogurt that much. the only one who can give u what u want, namely, love for yogurt, is u. and regarding the others... just think about it. what are they? nothing but a landmass. nothing but a mass of flesh and bones that represents lots of flesh and bones. what are their words? nothing but sounds they produce using said flesh and the air around them.'

'I-I'll think about it...' bulgaria pulls away, a bit calmer.

'good. cuz my time here is running out. SEE U IN SEVERAL DAYS' old great bulgaria yells as the portal reopens and swallows him.

'so I gotta stop wanting friends and caring about them if I want to be happy... but... can I really do that? caring about others and wanting to be around others... is like a part of me... but guess I'll try' bulgaria thinks.

then the door opens. light comes in and bulgaria squints his eyes. he manages to make out the silhouette of a person.

romania.