Jumin's POV

"W-what?!" Wide eyes and a gaping mouth occupy Zen's expression. "Five… five BILLION won?!"

"Yes, I think that is a good starting point." I tilt my head to the other side. It should be enough. I can always dedicate more funds as the need arises. I'll of course have to create a new department and have them look into it, but this new project is more than doable. My eyes trail down and unfocus as I begin to think about the technicalities.

"J-Jumin, don't…" His words are quiet, but it's impossible for me to tune out his voice.

"Don't what?" I pull my attention from the numbers running through my head and refocus on him. When I do, I see him shaking, his eyes red and teaming with tears. I look to his mouth, which is set in a tight, quivering grimace. I reach my hand out across the table to him. "Zen, what's wrong?"

Zen opens his mouth to answer, but is silenced by a knock at the front door. We both turn, surprised by the interruption. I look back to Zen, who is blinking back his feelings and clearing his throat, his eyes looking everywhere but at me.

"We will continue this in a moment," I reassure him, and myself, as I get up and move to the door. I hate to walk away from him in such a state. I will just shoo away whoever is here as quickly as possible, then I can be at his side. But once I see who it is, my eyes narrow in annoyance.

"Mr. Han," she greets me, tone all business, but I take note of her eager eyes darting behind me and into my penthouse.

"Assistant Kang. What are you doing here? You were supposed to be handling matters at the office today."

She holds up a manila folder. "You had documents that required signing."

"You could have used a courier," I say flatly.

"Yes. I could have." She pushes her glasses back up to the bridge of her nose.

"Is that Jaehee's voice I hear?" Zen calls from the dining area.

Assistant Kang gives me a small smile and asks, "May I come in, sir?"

My jaw twitches, but I step out of the way. "Let's make this quick."

As soon as she enters, I watch as her gaze locks onto Zen and her whole demeanor comes alive. But just as quickly as she lights up, her shoulders wilt, and her lips part into a gentle o.

In a barely audible whisper, she murmurs, "Has Zen been crying?"

I look to Zen, who is quickly scarfing down his breakfast in a most inglorious manner. Sadly, even from here, you can see the redness and puffiness around his eyes. Yes, I think to answer, but I'm not entirely sure why. I am fairly certain it was my fault, though. I quickly decide that I will not be sharing that with Assistant Kang.

"I had been wondering what was keeping you from work, but I understand now," she continues under her breath. "His audition is coming up so quickly. I hope that this doesn't affect it." She turns to me, an unusual determinedness in her eyes. "Please, sir, let me know if there is anything I can do to help."

Dishes clang in the sink before Zen jogs over to us, a welcoming smile directed at… not me. I want him to smile at me. Only me. Assistant Kang and Zen exchange pleasantries, all while I strain to keep my hands from wrapping around him in a show of ownership. He is mine, isn't he? After what we have said… what we have done? Suddenly the need to have him say those words aloud claws at me like a demand for air.

"Jaehee, since you're here, maybe you can help me talk some sense into this rich idiot," Zen says with a sigh. One hand on his hip, he hooks the other one in my direction, indicating that I am apparently the 'rich idiot.' My brows furrow as I wonder if he really means that.

"Based on experience, I won't be able to help with that," Assistant Kang replies with a tight smile. What is that supposed to mean? "But go on. I will do my best."

Zen sighs, then begins his tirade against me. "Jumin just told me he wants to spend 5 billion won to set up a charity to help young people like those girls who tried to take me. I definitely want to help them, but that's so much money and-"

"That's a wonderful idea, actually," Assistant Kang interjects, bringing her hand to her mouth.

"Wait, what?!" Zen yells.

"Yes, this would solve the PR issues for C&R and help to recover your image as well. If the two of you hold a press conference and…"

I listened as she went on about how we could present things so that both Zen and C&R come out looking quite favorably after the scandal. And her ideas made a lot of sense. I cross my arms and close my eyes, thinking about this new angle. I had only wanted to give Zen a gift… but this is an excellent turn of events.

"Wait, wait, no! This is not how this is supposed to go! Jaehee! You have to agree with me that this is too much!"

I turn to Zen with narrowed eyes. "There is no such thing as 'too much.'"

"See!" He waves a frantic hand in my direction, seeming displeased. "Jaehee, please…!"

"Zen," Assistant Kang looks to him seriously, "he spends as much on his various cat project start-ups every year. At least this would be helping people. This is a project I'd be happy to work on." She puts her hand over her heart to emphasize her earnestness.

They stare at each other, their expressions changing slightly as they do. Zen seeming to push the intensity of his displeasure, and Assistant Kang giving him increasingly sympathetic eyes. I stand silently, becoming progressively more and more frustrated, not sure what conversation they seem to be having beyond the one in words. But finally, Zen's face slacks into a pout, his shoulders slump in resignation, and he turns to look at me.

"Okay…" His cheeks flush as the corner of his lip quirks back into a soft grimace. "Thanks… Jumin… Let's do the charity thing…"

Why doesn't he look happy? Doesn't he know that I'm doing this for him? To give him relief from his worries and to see him smile?

"Excellent," Assistant Kang smiles. "Now, my next suggestion may be a bit more sensitive, but if you will allow it sir, I'd like to put the idea out there."

I reluctantly tear my gaze away from Zen. "Go ahead."

"Since Rika's passing, the R.F.A. has not had any parties or any effective accomplishments. Perhaps this new charity would be a good beneficiary of another fundraising event. It could be a reason to get the R.F.A. active again." She pauses here, and I'm glad that she gives me a moment. The thought of starting up the R.F.A. parties again without Rika… well, it's near impossible to imagine. "But sir, I know how difficult and emotional of a decision that would be for everyone. I just wanted to put the suggestion out there."

I stare indistinctly into the living room. Assistant Kang's presence demands that I tuck away my pain for later, so I set my jaw, not letting my grief show. But I feel a sudden hand on my arm. The surprising contact makes me jolt, but even before I turn to look, I know it must be Zen's tender grip on my bicep. Zen… I'm not used to someone touching me so casually. It's rather comforting. My eyes move from his hand up to his face, gentle concern visible in his features. My chest swells with that hum again, and I can't help but smile softly at him.

Turning back to Assistant Kang, I say, "I will think it over and speak with V."

"I should get going back to the office," Assistant Kang says, "but perhaps Mr. Han and I could trade places next week, and I could keep you company instead. What do you think, Zen?"

My mood shifts in an instant as ice threads up my spine and I throw mental daggers at her. Do I see 'former secretary' in her future?

"Ah, Jumin, are you planning to stay home next week, too?" Zen looks at me with questioning surprise, and I feel the ice melt as quickly as it came.

"Yes..." I answer simply. I want to say more, but the thought occurs to me that he may not want me home with him. He has said he likes me, but what does that mean to him? I would throw away the rest of the world for him, but I can't see Zen committing to me in the same way.

"But I could switch off if you'd like," Assistant Kang reiterates. "Whatever you think will help you focus better for your audition."

I look to Zen, waiting for his answer. If he says he wants me gone, what will I do? I clench my fists at my sides. A sickening feeling twists in my torso as a second stretches into a minute in my mind.

"Nah, it's okay, Jaehee." Zen smiles lightly and, to my utter surprise, swings his arm over my shoulder. "Jumin and I have been getting along well. As long as he lets me practice," he reaches his other hand over to poke my side, which creates an odd sensation through my muscle, "I think I'll be fine."

My jaw tenses shut as I gawk at his face, inches from my own. As I stare, his cheeks begin to gain more and more color, and my heart begins to beat faster and faster. He's touching me. Again. Just like a moment ago, this is nothing sexual. If anything, it is platonic and friendly. And yet, I feel so… My mind races to place this emotion, but it finds no name. His heat surrounds the nape of my neck, the weight of his arm a reassuring force against my back.

"I'm quite glad to hear that." Assistant's Kang's voice breaks me away from the moment. "But you know how to reach me if you need anything. Call anytime. Day or night." She smiles, then her eyes flit between us, and she adds, "Zen, I mean. Zen can call day or night."

I feel that itch again to claim him. But right now, with Zen's arm already around me, I can breathe easily enough.

"Zen. Mr. Han." She gives a curt bow, collects the signed papers, and leaves.

As the door clicks shut, I feel Zen's arm fall, cool air taking its place in the worst way.

"Wait," I say quickly, grabbing his shirt before he steps away. "Will you… Can I…?"

Zen gives me a kind, half smile. "Did you want a hug, Jumin?"

A hug? My heart pounds with such ferocity over even this. A hug. I nod, reaching my arms out and around him. His body fits snuggly against mine as his arms wrap tightly around me. We have already hugged. We have done so much more. And yet this… this satisfies something deep, deep inside me, like a salve for my soul.

"It's the least I can do, isn't it?" he says with a soft sigh against my neck.

"...What do you mean?" I ask, not letting him go.

"Well," he says with a single laugh, "less than 24 hours into our relationship and you're spending 5 billion won on something for me." I wish I could see Zen's face, but my only indication of his mood is his pained tone of voice and the additional tightening of his arms around my neck. His voice is barely above a whisper as he adds, "I'll never be able to repay you, Jumin."

Is this what was bothering him? He thinks he has to pay me back? "Do you think I'm some sort of corporate gangster? It's a gift, not a loan."

I feel his body tense against me, and then, slowly building from a stifled chuckle, he laughs, the rumble of it shaking the both of us. "You, a corporate gangster?" he snickers. "Oh man, that's funny to imagine. But Jumin…" he nuzzles his head into my neck in a way that tingles through my core, "if you want to get me a gift, you can just stop at a street vendor and get me some flowers or a fish-shaped bun. Okay? This kind of money is too much for a gift."

A fish-shaped bun? What in the world is he talking about?

I file his words away for later and hug him tighter. "That money means nothing to me." A moment passes, tightness welling up in my chest and threatening to suffocate me. But before I can stop myself, the words come pouring out of me. "You are always bringing up my wealth. 'Trust-fund jerk.' 'CEO-in-line.' And now…'rich idiot.' My money is a part of me, and yet distinctly separate. I was born into this life, but I did not ask for it. I would trade all of my wealth for… for a life without the gnawing isolation I had become accustomed to. For a life filled with love."

"Jumin," Zen's voice is soft as he slowly pulls out of my grasp to look at me. "You're absolutely right," he murmurs. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have called you that. Money is not important. And I know it's not all of who you are. I was just feeling insecure." Insecure? I'm sure bewilderment shows on my face as he continues. "You can have literally anything you want at the snap of your fingers. So you tossing 5 billion won at something for me like it's nothing… I just thought… how can I possibly be on your level? The things I've done… The things I haven't done… I just worry I have nothing to offer you..."

I stare at him in silence for a moment, processing his words. They seem so obviously foolish to me. Isn't it evident how much his mere company means to me? And how could he - he who is radiance and passion personified - think so little of himself?

"Nothing to offer me? Zen," I say sternly, taking his hands tightly in my own, "your presence, your touch... These things are worth far more to me than any amount of money. Truly Zen, even if all you ever give me is companionship, I will be happier than any amount of riches could ever bring me. I don't care about your past or your wallet other than how it made you who you are today."

Tears well up in Zen's eyes again, and I feel my heart breaking. How many times have I made him cry? But this time a beaming smile accompanies them, and he brings our joined hands to his cheek in a loving gesture.

"Then how can I thank you?"

This seems an opportune moment to tease him. To hint towards all of the lewd things he could do for me in thanks. But that's not what I want. Not really. I want something more, need something more from him. I want him to be as consumed by me as I am for him. I want us to be equals in this tender mania of the heart.

I lean in as I feel my sense of control wavering, the need to wrap myself around him and consume him as an extension of myself becoming overwhelming. Over and over again in my head the request comes for him to simply say that he is mine. That he belongs to me, just as my every breath now belongs to him. But I struggle to voice it. Because what if he says no? At least in this state of limbo I have hope that the depth of his feelings mirrors mine.

"Oh!" he says excitedly, his eyes widening with an idea. "What if I finally do your cat food commercials? You've been asking me forever to model for that stuff and do ads, but with my allergies there was no way. But with these shots, I can totally do it! What do you think?" He grins widely, his face alight and beautiful.

And just like that, the tension in my body slacks. I can't help but smile peacefully at him. He is so cute. My eyes flit down from his smile to his neck, and I feel the urge to kiss it. Nibble at it and get him going.

"Can I touch you?"

"You're already touching me," he says with a laugh, holding up our joined hands.

"Is that a yes?" I ask, unable to control the mischievous smirk that spreads my lips.

And as his cheeks flush that glorious pink and he gives me a nod, air swells in my lungs with a satisfying fullness. I break my hands away from his and pull him back into a hug. Burying my face into his neck, I breathe deeply, taking in his scent as I run my nose along his fair skin.

I feel his chest rise and fall faster against me, and his arms wrap around me with a clinging intensity. Yes… Need me… My thoughts ring with satisfaction.

"S-so Jumin… Does that sound good? With the cat thing?" Every word comes out shaky.

"Mmm," I hum against his ear. Then one, two, three… I trail gentle sucking kisses down the line of his throat. "It sounds lovely," I rumble.

And it really did sound lovely. Zen and my dear Elizabeth the 3rd together on screen. Her white fur and his silver hair in parallel, glowing like a beacon of light. It is sure to increase sales… But that is a thought for another day, another moment in time when I don't have this intoxicating man in my arms.

My lips continue their path down his neck while my hands begin to roam along his body. Up and down his firm back. Wrapping snugly around the nape of his neck. Sliding down to grip his ass in my palm.

"J-Jumin, what are you…" His hands tighten against my dress shirt.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" I say with a nip at the muscle peeking out from his shirt collar. A clipped moan slips past his lips, setting my blood on fire. "Do you want me to stop?" I ask huskily, feeling myself tipping into the realm of incoherent desire.

"No, but… what about work? I need to rehearse… I want to-" I pull his waist tight against mine, eliciting a gasp before he continues, "do more, but… can we wait? Until later?" His words fall softly against my ear. Heavy panting breaths separate every statement, each exhale sending hot thrills down my spine. "I mean Jumin… babe…you make me so happy… so accepted... I want to… give myself to you… But I feel like I'm getting swept away. Like I'm losing track of reality… So please…"

Time seems to stop even before he finishes speaking. My breath halts in my lungs, and my hands still against his body as his words echo in my mind. I make him happy? I sweep him away from reality? He wants to give himself to me…?

It's everything I wanted to hear.

I close my eyes as I draw air in, reviving my aching chest. My mind races with unprecedented yearning. I could push him. The way he's trembling against me, I doubt it would take much. I could get him to agree. I could have him right now… I grit my teeth and claw at his back through his shirt. But he's asked me to wait. Later… Does that mean tonight? Tomorrow? A week? I would wait forever if I had to, but…

"Tonight?" I ask quietly, not daring to let go of him.

"T-tonight," he agrees.