Chapter 29

Laying bare

"Zoro, did something happen?"

The swordsman raised his head and looked questioningly at the navigator facing him. He was on laundry duty that morning and he was applying himself to hanging out the boys' laundry as best he could on the washing line behind the tangerine's trees.

"With Sanji-kun," The young woman said when she saw his incomprehension.

"No." The fencer returned his attention to his task and the redhead frowned.

The weather had been gray since they had docked the Sunny a few days before in the small cove of the island. Although the Log-Pose had already reset, the Straw Hat crew had decided to take advantage of its serene surroundings. This was indeed the first less hostile land they encountered in the New World and with Usopp's recovery, everyone had been keen to get some rest and recover from their emotions as long as they could. Even Luffy didn't mind not leaving immediately and the crewmembers carefully filled the Sunny's holds with food and medicine while Franky pampered his creation after the last ordeals they had been through.

The inhabitants were few in number on this autumnal island but given the violent context in which they were, they remained on their guard and were rather quick to draw their weapons. However, since the pirate crew had been content to pay for their purchases without making a fuss, the islanders had agreed to serve them while watching them warily. For the four days they had been here now, some locals even gave them vague nods when they met the crew in town or by the sea.

The atmosphere wasn't relaxed but it wasn't electric either and the girls felt safe enough to walk around town alone. Similarly, Brook and Franky had been able to buy wood for the Sunny without problem and Chopper had spoken at length with the local pharmacist, wanting to inquire as much information as possible after their last misadventure. For his part, Luffy had walked around the island from the first day but it hadn't caught his attention because he spent almost all his time on the ship with Usopp who was recovering slowly now.

Meanwhile, Zoro was like a caged lion. Unlike his crewmates, the rest he usually enjoyed was unbearable to him lately and he kept busy tirelessly between his training and his hours of meditation before disappearing at nightfall in a tavern. The day before, he had even missed breakfast and the crew had begun to worry about his absence before he turned up on deck in the middle of the morning, his eyes red and his clothes undone. His friends had feared the fencer had been in a fight in town and they had expected to be expelled harshly but no one had come to ask them to leave.

They had thought that the swordsman had spent the night drinking then and his sleepless night had allowed everyone to breathe the next day since Zoro had spent it sleeping. Indeed, the little time Zoro spent in their company, he was always in a foul mood or extremely listless and this morning was no exception.

That's why despite the obvious lack of spirit of her crewmate to answer, Nami decided to insist, ignoring Zoro's growing annoyance. "Why don't you wanna talk to him when he calls then?"

"Don't feel like it."

The navigator rolled her eyes. "Don't lie. I know something happened; he was weird the last time we brought this up."

Zoro didn't answer and the young woman put her hands on her hips, clearly irritated now. She didn't know why her two friends were trying to ignore each other, but in the current state of affairs, she was trying by all means to solve a problem that weighed on the general atmosphere and could get them noticed.

"Don't be silly you two! As soon as we leave this island, we don't even know when we can call each other again and I'm not even talking about seeing each other again!"

The swordsman went on with his task, totally ignoring her, and Nami decided to use another tactic. After all, she knew Zoro wasn't impressed by her outbursts and his natural tendency to keep quiet didn't make it any easier. "Look, he doesn't wanna say it but I know he wouldn't mind talking to you. Besides, he's worried about us. Don't you think you could put your pride aside for once?" She sighed.

"He knew we were leaving for the New World, why would he worry?"

"Of course he knew but just like us, I'm not sure he expected us to have so much trouble when we arrived here…"

"We ain't in trouble." Nami stared at him over the sheet he had just hung out. "Usopp just almost died and the slightest inhabitant we meet has incredible strength! Insecurity is total, on the sea as much as on land, and I'm almost afraid to leave this island!" She reminded him.

"If you get depressed at the slightest obstacle, you'll never be able to achieve your goal," The swordsman pointed out coldly.

"I may not be reckless like you or Luffy in the face of danger, but that doesn't mean I'm stupid," The redhead replied dryly. "Everyone noticed the New World is much more complicated than we had imagined!"

"We just need to work harder," The fencer retorted in a harsh voice.

"Being in good spirits is important too and, on this point, I can't say you're helping to ease tensions!" Her friend reproached him again.

"What else do you wanna blame me for? I don't open my mouth!" The swordsman growled, violently grabbing a tee-shirt.

"Exactly! Everyone's walking on eggshells around you, it's unbearable! Talk to Sanji-kun!"

The swordsman paused, his clothespin above the tee-shirt he had hung out abruptly, and stared into her eyes. "You think by talking to the cook everything will suddenly work out? You think pirates will run away in fear after hearing his voice?"

Nami bit her tongue to keep from insulting him. "You know exactly what I mean. If you reconcile, you'll be less on edge and everyone will be calmer. At least admit you're not in your right mind!"

Zoro planted his last clothespin on the washing line and quickly turned his back on the navigator before walking away. "It wouldn't change anything. We didn't have a fight."

Perplexed, Nami watched the swordsman's figure move towards the crow's nest. If Zoro and Sanji didn't have a fight, what had happened?

"I made ice cream!"

Chopper happily approached his friends gathered on deck this early afternoon with bowls of ice cream placed precariously on his tray. Lunch had been simple sandwiches and the little reindeer had offered to concoct a treat for the crew who were enjoying the sun filtering through the clouds. Everyone had immediately approved, delighted to take advantage of this vacation-like dessert to counter the permanent discomfort that enveloped them.

"Ice cream, awesome!" Luffy drooled as he rushed towards him.

"I made yours with chocolate and melon," The doctor showed him, his eyes shining with excitement.

"So cool!"

"Thanks, Chopper," Nami said when she grabbed a bowl of citrus ice cream while straightening up on her deckchair.

"I made an assortment according to everyone's taste!" The doctor waddled as Usopp and Franky greedily chose theirs.

"It's a very delicate attention," Robin thanked him, grabbing her own bowl.

"Milk jam ice cream is my favorite!" Brook rejoiced in turn.

"You idiots, your compliments don't make me happy at all!" His friends giggled and the reindeer walked over to the last crewmember who had closed his eyes against the mast. "Zoro, I picked a green tea ice cream for you!"

"No thanks," The man grunted, eyes still closed.

"I can leave it in the freezer for later if you want," The little doctor offered.

"No need."

"Do you prefer another taste?" Chopper inquired, worried.

"No, I usually don't like ice cream anyway."

"I know you like mint but since there isn't any and you like green tea, I thought that-"

"I don't want ice cream, that's all! Is it that hard to understand?!" The little reindeer stepped back in front of the fencer's outburst and his ice cream fell on the Sunny's grass. The crew froze and Chopper's eyes instantly filled with tears.

Nami jumped out of her deckchair. "What's your problem, he's just offering you an ice cream!" She roared.

"I just said I don't want it!"

"It doesn't exempt you from being polite as far as I know! Chopper went to great lengths to make these bowls!"

"I didn't ask for it!" The swordsman barked again.

"You're part of this crew so you have an ice cream like everyone else! And it's not Sanji-kun in front of you so you're gonna keep it down because he's doing his best!"

The swordsman's jaw twitched violently and Nami thought he was going to reply but he finally chose to get up and walk towards the back of the ship with angry strides. The navigator glared at his back, furious. "I've had enough of this idiot," She growled after he had disappeared. "We tried to spare him until now but he's going too far!"

"I think he's been worried since we entered the New World," Franky sighed, "It must be said that we ain't on top right now…"

"Our swordsman is concerned about our future," Robin approved.

"It's about his role as protector of the crew, I can understand," Brook added.

"And he misses Sanji but they don't wanna talk to each other," Usopp grumbled.

"I-I-I just wanted to please him," The little reindeer sniffed.

"Don't worry, your ice cream is really good, Chopper!" The captain assured him because he had hastened to grab what he could from the ground.

"We were too nice to him and the result is even worse!" Nami showed them, still furious. "From now on, no preferential treatment, it's over! He's worried about our level in the New World? He needs to think of a plan instead of picking on us then! And if he misses Sanji-kun, he just has to pick up the Den-Den Mushi when it rings!"

The navigator turned on her heels and went to lock herself in the library.

That evening, dinner passed in a heavy silence. Only the clinking of cutlery could be heard against the plates and it seemed that everyone was trying to make as little noise as possible, except for the captain who devoured his chili con carne heartily as usual.

Towards the end of the meal, unable to stand it any longer, Chopper got up in his chair and planted his little front paws on the table to stare at the swordsman. His face was full of guilt. "I apologize for this afternoon, Zoro, I shouldn't have insisted on the ice cream if you didn't want it."

Beside them, the crew members tensed up, fearing a new escalation of emotion from the doctor that would lead to another tantrum from the fencer. Indeed, everyone had understood that Chopper and Zoro were trying to mourn the presence of their cook in a radically different way. Inevitably, it contributed to increasingly palpable tensions on the Sunny.

Yet to their surprise, Zoro just raised his head. "I'm the one who should apologize, Chopper. You tried your best and I shouldn't have reacted the way I did." The little reindeer nodded, his throat tight, and the swordsman slowly put his fork down next to his empty plate. "If you don't mind, I'd rather you stopped doing my snacks. I'll do it myself."

All his friends stared at him in disbelief. If Zoro excluded himself from meals, he was also excluding himself from what was part of the lives of the crew and this act symbolized much more than a simple refusal about some food.

Chopper panicked. "I can ask Sanji for your favorite recipes! I can practice, I can-"

"You have to stop doing that."

Zoro looked at his crewmates who were still turned towards him, their faces tense. "I know what you're trying to do but there's no point."

Usopp looked down and Franky cleared his throat in embarrassment, but Nami frowned. Zoro then turned all his attention to the ship's doctor. "You will not make up for his absence by doing everything he did and it's not by trying to replace him that you'll feel better. He's not here, you need to accept it." The swordsman sighed. "I know you're trying to… help me. But you can't do it that way."

The little reindeer lowered his head and tears silently rolled down his cheeks as Zoro got up and put his napkin on the table before heading for the door.

"I'm s-sorry, Z-Zoro, I just w-wanted to do well. I know you m-miss him s-so I did my best to a-act like he was still here…"

At these words, the swordsman's hand froze above the doorknob and his breath hitched. "You're not Sanji, Chopper. If you really wanna help me, don't make things harder than they are." The fencer slowly closed the door behind him and his friends tried to recover from the shock of his words.

The doctor tried to swallow back his tears before sitting back in his chair, gnawed by remorse. "I ju-just w-wanted to he-help…"

Franky patted him on the back. "Of course you wanna help, but it doesn't work that way with Zoro-bro."

"I think our swordsman is right. We all need closure to move on," Robin said.

"We're not talking about forgetting Sanji but we can't live only thinking about him, Chopper," Usopp explained kindly, "It hurts us and it probably hurts Zoro even more…"

"We must keep in mind the happy moments with our chef and allow ourselves to create other memories without him," Brook added softly.

"We shouldn't have left so quickly," The sniper sighed. The crew was surprised and the man looked in the direction of his captain, embarrassed. "It happened so fast… We'd have had a chance to prepare and maybe Zoro wouldn't be like this if he could have discussed it with Sanji…"

Beside him, Nami shook her head. "Don't be so sure, I think it was his idea."

Her friends turned towards her, stunned, before questioning their captain with a look, but Luffy didn't flinch. He was still busy eating, although more silently.

"How so?" Chopper asked her when he turned his attention back to the navigator. "Zoro refuses to talk to him but Sanji-kun wouldn't be against it," She explained. "I thought they had a fight but Zoro assured me otherwise and I believe him. He's not a liar."

"Maybe he just misses Sanji, and Zoro finds it hard to admit it," Usopp suggested.

"When we were separated for three months, he never behaved this way," The redhead reminded him, "They didn't want to talk to each other, but the atmosphere has never been so heavy."

"Our friend looks particularly angry," Brook agreed.

"That's right and I don't think this anger is really directed at us," Nami continued, glancing at the little reindeer who had shrunk in his chair when he heard the musician. "Zoro usually knows how to control himself."

"What do you think happened?" Franky inquired, puzzled.

"I don't know," She admitted, "Maybe it's because of All Blue…"

"Do you think Zoro is angry with him for staying?" Brook wondered in turn.

"I don't think our swordsman would stand in the way of his crewmate's dream, even if he also shares his life," Robin noted.

"I agree but… Maybe he considers it a kind of betrayal towards the crew and the fact that we're in trouble accentuates this feeling? After all, even he is forced to recognize that Sanji-kun is a significant asset when it comes to fighting."

"Zoro would have cut ties as quickly as possible to mark his disagreement?" Franky said.

"That'd explain why he turned up on the beach that day as if he knew we were gonna leave when we hadn't seen him all evening or even all night," Usopp then remembered.

"And that'd explain why Sanji was so overwhelmed that night," The little reindeer remembered sadly.

"No doubt it was his way of punishing him," The navigator sighed.

"Zoro is in pain, but leaving was my choice, not his. I'm the captain so you shouldn't judge him because of his actions today."

The clear voice of the straw hat boy sounded like a call to order and his crew looked down. Luffy never referred to his position and he usually never participated in this kind of conversation. His tone, however, suffered no reply and no one thought of contradicting him.

The end of the meal was quickly swallowed and everyone left the galley, still uneasy about the latest events. Nami and Franky found themselves alone to do the dishes. The young woman sighed as she passed the plates to the cyborg who rinsed them before placing them on the drainer. Where had gone the happy days that the crew enjoyed without stopping despite their terrifying adventures?

"Zoro suffers from Sanji-kun's absence as much as we do and whatever happened between them, I still believe he'd feel better if they could talk about it," She suddenly said to her friend.

The huge shipwright beside her sighed and adjusted the temperature of the water. "He cleared the air with Chopper, it'll be fine now."

"He only shifted the problem by asking not to give him snacks anymore," The navigator said. "I don't know how long this relative calm will last or when it'll re-emerge and we can't take that kind of risk."

"What are you gonna do then?" He asked her. "Sanji's far away, we can't lock them up for them to settle their problem by fighting before making up between the sheets like they used to…"

Nami frowned, aware of the accuracy of his words. "Loyalty is important to Zoro and Sanji-kun remains our crewmate despite his absence. Luffy had been very clear about this."

Franky put another plate on the drainer, nodding, and the redhead grabbed another dish towel to dry the dishes with determination. While she was aware that they all missed Sanji, Nami also knew that the swordsman had lost a little more than them the day they left All Blue. Tonight, he had made the effort to put his resentment aside to explain it and she was convinced that putting words on their pain would only allow them to move on.

"If Zoro refuses to talk to him because he thinks Sanji abandoned us, he also knows it was his dream. Zoro can forgive a crewmate for that."

"Let's hope that's what it is then…"

"Sorry for disturbing you but Nami insisted."

"Did something happen?"

Sanji didn't bother to unzip his heavy winter coat and the few snowflakes that had fallen in his hair during his run melted with the heat of the room.

"She said it wasn't a matter of life and death but it's still important enough that she asked me to make you come," Liam replied with worry, showing him the waiting Den-Den Mushi.

Swallowing the anguish that knotted his stomach, the cook sat down in front of the device and immediately turned the button on the transmitter. His own Den-Den Mushi had rung when he was getting ready to go to bed not long before, but it hadn't taken him more than a few minutes to turn up in the scientist's workshop.

"Nami-san?"

"Sanji-kun, I"m sorry to call so late."

"It doesn't matter, my dove. What's going on?"

The blond heard the navigator sigh on the other side of the device and he frowned, definitely worried.

"Sanji-kun, I don't know what happened between you and Zoro but he's not okay. Actually, we all aren't okay…" The cook froze in his chair and his friend's voice was heard again in the transmitter. "At first, we thought it was normal, we're all sad because you aren't with us… But since we entered the New World, everyone is on edge and that doesn't help…" Nami sighed again. "He managed to explain himself to Chopper tonight but he also decided to exclude himself so as not to create any more problems and I don't know what to do to settle things once and for all…"

"What do you want me to do, Nami-san?" The blond whispered.

"I thought you could talk about it, try to solve this situation so that he can move on… I know you're not big talkers when it comes to the both of you but it's obvious that your absence is destabilizing him and focusing on what lies ahead is hard enough."

Sanji bit his lip. "Trust me, if I could, I would," He assured her softly, "Just give him some time, he'll recover."

"You don't know the state he's in, Sanji-kun! We're all on our guard in his presence and the only times we're fine is when he spends the night who-knows-where on the island but then we're afraid he'll pick fights everywhere!"

"He won't let you down, Nami-san. Trust me."

The young woman seemed to get lost in her thoughts for a moment, probably hesitant, before speaking again. "I trust Zoro, that's beside the point. The real concern is that our environment won't let us make the slightest mistake and if something happens, he'll be the first to blame himself."

Sanji swallowed, his throat tight. "I'm sorry, there's nothing I can do, Nami-san," He whispered again, "This is out of my hands now…"

The faint voice of the man alerted the navigator. "What do you mean?" She asked, clearly worried.

Sanji closed his eyes. This was it. He would have liked to keep this secret buried deep within him for a long time but today, the crew needed to know the truth to move on. "Zoro and I have decided to end our relationship before the Sunny goes back to sea. I'm sorry but anything I could say will be useless now. Only he can decide what happens next."

A silence stretched for a few seconds on either side of the Den-Den Mushi and the blond focused on the device. He didn't want to meet Liam's stunned gaze because he knew the scientist was staring at him.

"Why?" The redhead's voice was confused when she spoke again. "I mean, I know it's none of my business but… why now?"

"We had to," The cook simply replied.

The navigator visibly refrained from adding anything. "I'm sorry, Sanji-kun… If I had known, I wouldn't have asked you to intervene…"

"It's okay, Nami-san, I knew we couldn't keep this information to ourselves forever… But whatever happens, you need to keep believing in him. Zoro has incredible willpower and he just needs a little space to restore his balance. But either way, he's more focused than ever on his goal, be sure of that."

A new silence stretched in the room. "When I hear you talk about him like you do, I really wonder what happened to you guys for you to decide it wasn't worth it anymore," She finally whispered, pained.

Sanji didn't add anything and the young woman sighed again.

"If you're sure of yourself, I trust you. Zoro can count on us until he recovers."

"Thank you, Nami-san…"

Now everyone knows… Will it be easier for them?

Who knows…