Chapter 62

Out of time

"You seem a little off."

Sanji focused back on the present moment when Liam took a new piece of cotton to disinfect the wound on his cheekbone. The scientist had come by every day since his attack to check that his wounds healed before everyone started their day. He was thus able to weigh up Chopper's persuasiveness given the cook's insistence on not caring about himself. Just dragging him to a doctor on a neighboring island for his ankle had taken him an entire day.

"I think about that guy who showed up at the port to give those bastards a beating. You should have seen him; he was so fast I barely saw him move!" Sanji replied admiringly, leaning against his kitchen table.

Liam smiled as he poured the disinfectant onto the cotton pad. Although the blond had returned with large wounds and a broken ankle, he had rarely been as elated as when talking about this mysterious young man. Only his passion for cooking and his crew triggered such enthusiasm and the scientist felt his heart sink at this realization.

"You sure you've never seen him before?" He continued while gently placing the cotton on the blond's cheek.

"No, I'd remember. He was so strong! And he also made it clear that it was Luffy he knew."

"Maybe he met him before you joined his crew?"

"Maybe. Either way, it must have been before Luffy even met Zoro, he'd have mentioned it otherwise. I swear he probably is as strong as a Warlord!"

Liam carefully observed the wound he had cleaned, satisfied with his work. He took another cotton pad soaked in alcohol to take care of the cook's brow bone then. "He's part of the Revolutionary Army, those well-known figures have a reputation of being very powerful," he pointed out, taking care not to hurt him.

"And their members are mostly unknown," the blond agreed, "I understand why the World Government fears them if they're all like him!"

"I'm really grateful to him for stepping in anyway. These guys went at you so fiercely." The dark-haired man sighed, examining his wound.

"They weren't that strong, there were just a few too many," the cook said, shrugging his shoulders.

"Some of them were Haki users, Sanji," the scientist reminded him. "They were extremely powerful and you were lucky to escape. Look at you, you're covered in wounds. Imagine if they had handed you over to the Marine, you wouldn't have been able to defend yourself!"

"I need to improve, I'm not good enough compared to the world leaders," the blond agreed.

"That's not what I meant." Liam protested and threw away the reddened cotton, "I just want you to take care of yourself."

"I'd really like to see him again. He could teach me his techniques…"

The scientist shook his head and moved towards the counter where he had left the medical kit. Sanji was already no longer listening, once again carried away by the excitement of his memories.

When the cook had come home with his clothes torn and covered in blood three days ago, Liam had panicked. Sanji was incredibly strong and he had protected All Blue for so long that the fact that he had come across someone more powerful than him had seemed unreal. The cowardice of his attackers had also twisted his stomach when he had learned of the trap the blond had fallen into.

And yet, despite the atrocity of the situation, Sanji hadn't lost this unexpected enthusiasm for a second while he was talking. Of course, he was furious at having been attacked in this way, but this formidable young man had aroused his curiosity as much as it had awakened the fighter who was still sleeping deep inside him. These new abilities had reminded the blond of his own quest for power over all these years and those he had developed with Zeff and then with his crew.

Liam had noticed it immediately. From that moment on, the blond wasn't just the All Blue's cook and protector anymore. He had become a pirate again.

"I've been thinking."

The scientist instantly turned his attention to his companion whose gaze was lost beyond the window of his house. He tried to ignore the racing of his heart. All the clues pointed to one end and Liam feared that the cook would end up putting the pieces together all the time. Today was no exception and as the days passed, the risks increased. Had Liam reached the end of the countdown? Had the day he feared arrived?

Pretending to put away the bandages and compresses, he closed the bottle of disinfectant as quietly as possible. "About what?"

"You were right. The promise I made to All Blue is about to be kept and I think I'd like to leave…"

Liam paused for a second in spite of himself but tried not to let anything show. He closed the small care kit slowly, his eyes fixed on his hands. After all, he had been expecting it.

"I see. You've finally made up your mind."

"Liam."

The man raised his head, surprised by the sudden softness of the cook's voice, and saw his hand extended in his direction. Without thinking, he left the kit to grab it and couldn't help but notice that his own hand was trembling.

Sanji pulled him closer before observing him carefully. "You don't seem surprised."

"I'm not. You said it yourself I knew you'd come to this conclusion. It was quite obvious to be honest…"

The cook sighed. "You must think I'm a complete hypocrite after what I told you last time, but I talked to the old man and he had an… interesting point of view."

"Sanji, I'll never think that of you", Liam said immediately while gently placing his lips on his. "I know it's not that simple for you."

The cook nodded before adjusting the collar of the scientist's tee-shirt caught in the headphones around his neck. "Anyway, if I leave, it won't be now. I still have many things to do. The island needs to be secured and I have to leave more initiatives to Elio and Sam so they won't be lost when the time comes. Of course, Zeff will be here but I don't want them to be a problem if I decide not to stay…"

He bit his lips then, his eyes once again lost towards the outside. "You're the first person I've talked to about it," he admitted. "I don't know how Lily or Amy would take it… Won't they think I'm abandoning them?"

"I don't think so. They know your life as a pirate has always meant a lot for you."

"Do they? So why do I feel so bad about leaving?" The blond grimaced, "Maybe this isn't such a good idea… What do you think?"

"If that's what you want, that's the most important." The dark-haired man eluded, lowering his eyes and Sanji shook his head firmly, "No, I need to know what you think about it. Really."

The scientist shook his head in turn before sighing. "What do you want me to say? I'm not gonna be happy that you're leaving and at the same time, I'm not gonna hold you back."

"You're right, I'm sorry." The cook agreed, "No one but me can make this decision…"

Liam broke away from the blond's arms, still not meeting his gaze. He wasn't proud of his last remark, but what Sanji was asking of him was beyond his strength. He sincerely wanted the blond's happiness but his own was closely linked to it and he was well aware that the cook didn't yet see all the implications that his choice would cause. But Liam knew it. He understood that this departure shouldn't have created an insurmountable ordeal between them. Sanji should have been able to leave and return to the All Blue as he traveled through the doors he encountered.

Yet if the scientist was so afraid of seeing the blond physically distancing himself, it was because he knew that this distance would also mean the end of their relationship. It wasn't strong enough to withstand this distance. Worse, Liam wasn't even sure if it would be strong enough to last even if the cook ultimately decided to stay. Being the one to push Sanji to set sail was a step he couldn't bring himself to take. Even if he had now understood that this departure was inevitable, he still wanted to take advantage of the remaining time. It was all he had left.

Yet his conscience quickly forced him to resume the conservation. He didn't want to be the one to push the blond to leave but he also didn't want to make him feel guilty with his silence. For sure, Sanji would stop himself from taking the leap. And if Liam would have the satisfaction of keeping him close, he would always know that his companion only belonged to him because he was forced to, even if Sanji didn't realize it. The scientist wouldn't do that. He respected the chef too much to steal his life and he loved him even more. He simply wanted to prove himself worthy of his trust at this moment when Sanji confided his doubts.

"So… If you leave, do you know how to find the Sunny?"

"Well, actually, I'm not gonna try to find it," the blond admitted, "I was thinking of joining them at Raftel or at least, waiting a little before showing up. Follow them from afar until the right time."

"Why?" The scientist wondered. "Is it because of this new chef?"

"No, it's… It's a choice I made two years ago when they left."

The dark-haired man was still looking at him questioningly and Sanji turned away to gather the various newspapers spread out on his table. "It's a decision I made with Zoro. A promise I made to him."

"Oh."

"It's just as well," the blond hastened to add, grabbing the last scattered papers, "That way I can train and focus on developing Haki. They must have made a lot of progress for their part and even though I had quite a few exercises here, I know I still have room to improve."

"Are you gonna try to find this man?"

"I'm not sure. He gave me his card but it's if there's a problem with All Blue. Maybe he could point me to someone. I need to come across him first though…"

"You'll be alone in the New World," the scientist reminded him, worried. "It'll be terribly dangerous…" As Sanji put away his last newspapers, he had a sparkling smile which destabilized his companion a little more. "I like challenges. The New World doesn't scare me and if I don't take risks, I have no chance of making progress anyway. Not to mention that if I don't have this elastic captain around, going unnoticed will finally be a real tactic!"

Liam felt his throat tighten as he listened to the blond once again get excited about his upcoming fights and the techniques he would show his crew next. He forced himself to swallow and not let go of his smile. Yet, his time was running out. More than ever.

"Sanji, look!"

Amy quickly pushed open the doors to the All Blue's kitchen and placed a small bag in front of the blond. She carefully opened it then, beaming. The blond was alone during this afternoon and he immediately dried his hands to look at her treasure.

"They come in all shapes!" He exclaimed.

"And look what I made with the ones I caught last time!"

The young girl took a small box out of her bag and the cook leaned towards her again. "Amy, this is beautiful…"

"You think so?"

The blond took from her hands a necklace made of a thin black chain on which three sparkling pink pearls had been strung and observed their changing reflections under the light of the room.

"I simply polished and cleaned them; it's their natural color." The young girl explained with excitement, "I was thinking of giving it to Lily to thank her. It's thanks to her that I discovered how to dive for pearls!"

"I'm sure she'll be very touched."

"I'm thinking of making brooches with these and other necklaces with those," she showed him then.

"Are you planning to sell them?" The cook asked her, still examining the necklace.

"Oh. Well, I don't know… Do you think anyone would be interested? For now, I only trained on my own and bought a book on pearl oysters to learn about their characteristics but that's it…"

Sanji turned his attention to his protégé who was clearly embarrassed.

"I don't know how to recognize their types or the possible processes yet…"

"So what?" The blond pointed out, "I don't know anything about jewelry but I can tell that the pearls you found are beautiful and the way you used a black chain to bring out the pink pearls is very elegant. I'm sure people would pay for these kinds of creations."

"Really? That'd be… nice. I really like diving for pearls and I like even more imagining how to enhance them," Amy admitted, her eyes shining with hope.

"Do a few tests and offer them on the markets of the surrounding islands, you'll see." The cook suggested again, "I'm willing to bet you'll be successful. For example, I'd be ready to buy you dozens of necklaces like this for Nami-san and Robin-chan; I'm sure they'll like them!"

"I'll go with Tori or Liam on their next island visit to have a space at a market then!"

Sanji nodded with satisfaction and handed her back her necklace. He then took back his own ingredients cheerfully.

"What are you testing today?" Amy asked, putting her pearls back in the box.

"Panna cotta with rose water. Beetroot, cheese and parsley millefeuille. Fresh goat cheese and fruit ice cream. Liam brought me some new cheeses this morning."

"Cheese ice cream?!" The young girl marveled, "Does it exist?!"

"Of course. You just need to add your favorite fruits to the fresh cheese, whisk everything and put it in the freezer for a few hours. Nothing's easier!"

"I wanna taste it now!" Amy salivated instantly.

The cook burst out laughing. "Tonight, I promise. I still need to work with Elio and Sam on the menus for the next season and make the dinner but after, I'm counting on you to tell me exactly what you think of it. You know, I intend to impress our future suppliers this time!"

"I'm sure it'll be delicious, as usual!" Amy said, "I'm so sad your dishes were ruined last time; you must have been furious." She then added in a morose voice, "Besides, you were injured…"

"These are the risks, Amy, but that doesn't mean they'll still have the upper hand if I encounter them again."

"I will defend you!" The young girl agreed vehemently. "I've improved a lot since you trained me with Lily!"

The blond grinned as he added a little sugar to his cream. "You have improved a lot but I'll never let anyone fight for me, least of all a beautiful young woman like you."

"But what if they send the Marine to get you?" She wanted to know, worried.

"I don't think so because they're outlaws themselves. The most likely thing would be that they talk and someone from Vorgo or elsewhere ends up knowing I'm here. At that point, maybe the Marine will actually turn up."

"What are you gonna do then?" Amy asked him, suddenly frightened.

"Don't worry, Zeff will be there to protect you no matter what. He'll take care of All Blue."

"But you'll have to leave? I don't want you to go!"

Amused, Sanji placed his finger full of flour on her nose and Amy gasped, falsely indignant, before wiping her face fiercely.

"Stop worrying about that. We'll see when the time comes, there's no point in imagining things that may never happen. Especially when you have sumptuous jewelry to create and I have succulent dishes to make!"

"Yes, you're right…"

Amy closed her box then turned around towards the exit, her bag in her arms. Arriving in front of the swinging doors, she turned one last time towards the blond who raised his head. "Still, if the Marine or other pirates come looking for you, they'll have to deal with me!"

With these words, the young girl disappeared into the dining room and Sanji stifled a laugh before grabbing his whip again, definitely happy. From the first minute, Amy had been a ray of sunshine and he thought back to the day he had allowed her to stay among them. It was undoubtedly the best decision he had made and he felt a wave of pride at the thought. He had brought together the best possible people to make his restaurant come alive and they proved it every day. All Blue was in good hands.

Liam knocked on the door of the cook's little house but no one answered. Puzzled, he checked the blond's presence thanks to the light lit inside and decided to enter after another unsuccessful attempt. It wasn't very late and the dark-haired man wanted to give the cook the last medicines he would need. Indeed, he was sure that Sanji would never take the time to go to the pharmacy himself.

According to the doctor they had consulted, apart from his ankle, the blond's brow bone injury was the most serious and they needed to check regularly that the healing continued. For the rest, the scientist had to admit that the cook was recovering spectacularly and deep down, he wasn't sure that his checks were necessary but he couldn't resist the idea of having an excuse to spend a little more time with him.

Liam didn't find the blond in his kitchen or living room so he headed upstairs and found him in his bedroom. With his back to him, Sanji didn't move upon his arrival, absorbed in the contemplation of the wall opposite his desk where he had sat. Sanji had spread the newspapers in front of him again and his dreamy gaze stabbed the scientist in the heart. There was such melancholy and affection on his companion's face when Sanji laid his eyes on the wanted posters of his crew. No one else was able to capture the blond's attention like his friends managed to do, even from the other side of the earth. Not Zeff, not Lily or Amy. Not even him.

Sanji's eyes lingered for a few more moments on the wanted poster of the crew's first mate and Liam froze, his heart pounding. He would never have liked to see it but tonight, he was forced to open his eyes. He had used every last grain from the hourglass that had begun to run since he had met that pirate cook one spring morning on the All Blue. His time was up.

"Just say it, Sanji."

The blond jumped when he heard his voice and instantly turned towards him. "Liam?"

"You're gonna go back to them so say it. I need to hear it. I'll never move on if I don't hear it from you."

"What? What are you talking about? I told you I wasn't sure of my decision yet-"

Liam took the few steps that separated him from the blond's chair and Sanji followed him with his gaze, stunned. The scientist knelt down to be at his level and took his face in his hands.

"You're a pirate, Sanji, the sea is your home. It's time for you to set sail again." The cook stared at him and Liam closed his eyes to rest his forehead against his, "Don't get me wrong, I don't want you to leave. I want you to stay on All Blue and I want to keep you for myself but if you stay… You're gonna die. And I don't want you to die."

"Liam, I know what I said this morning contradicts everything I've said for months but-"

"Please let me finish."

Sanji fell silent and the dark-haired man slid his hands around the back of the blond's neck, his breath trembling.

"You are the most incredible person I have ever met. You have such passion and vitality; it dazzles me every day. But if you stay here, you'll waste away and die. It is with your crew that you shine best, I saw it. Meeting this man from the Revolutionary Army has given you back some of that fire, a little of that unique spark I admire so much. That's a sign I can't ignore."

Sanji remained still and when Liam opened his eyes, he was teary. He met the disconcerted face of the cook then.

"That's why… You have to go back to your crew, Sanji. Go back and be happy. You deserve it, you kept your promise. Wherever you go in the world from now on, you know that All Blue will be waiting for you. Its doors can bring you back here whenever you want and we'll be there too. We'll never forget what you did for this island. I'll never forget you either."

Sanji took a few seconds to process his words before shaking his head uncomfortably. "I'm also happy here, Liam. It's just that some things happened that I didn't plan for…"

He sighed and then stared into the trembling eyes of his companion fixed on him. "I always thought I'd leave All Blue once the island was developed enough. But in the end, I made a promise to Zoro not to return to the Sunny so that he could fulfill his own dream and nothing and no one will make me break this oath. So I can leave and join them at Raftel but this journey could take me years and deep down, I wonder if the best isn't to stay here, where I can be useful… For All Blue and its inhabitants."

At these words, Liam slowly turned his head towards the swordsman's wanted poster and stared at his face. Zoro didn't look back at him, his attention turned to an enemy he had defeated years before. The swordsman shared a love of fighting with Sanji and their complicity in battles had taken the scientist's breath away time and time again when he had watched them. They fight to better meet and complement each other regarding each aspect of their lives and it was clear that his own relationship with the blond had never revealed such chemistry between them.

"Liam, I need to tell you something… About Zoro…"

The cook's tense voice abruptly brought him back to reality and he placed his lips on the blond's forehead, two tears silently rolling down his cheeks.

"I know, Sanji, don't worry."

"Wh-What do you mean?" The chef stammered, turning pale.

"I know you're not over him." Liam saw the cook gulping and he ran a tender hand over his cheek to soothe him despite his own pain. "I never tried to replace him, not even for a second. I just wanted a place by your side. Any place. And I know you did your best about it but it seems that … I'm not the one you need…"

Facing him, Sanji grabbed the scientist's hand and squeezed it in his own forcefully, brimming with guilt.

"Liam, I am so sorry… I never wanted to hurt you or use you, I… I can't even tell what really happened. Everything was fine until these last few days and then… I don't know. But I want you to know that I truly enjoyed every moment I spent with you, I swear."

"I believe you." Liam calmed him down, trying to control his voice despite the flood of emotions that threatened to overwhelm him, "You know, I think I always knew this moment would come. I knew that… that you hadn't really moved on with Zoro… I chose to look the other way and selfishly enjoy what you offered me. I was just hoping that one day, you would only see me. I know it was stupid…"

"It wasn't stupid." The blond murmured, "I accepted what you gave me because I didn't want to be in pain anymore and thanks to you, I felt able to face life here. I owe you so much, Liam…"

The scientist choked back his tears and Sanji pushed his chair to hug him. The dark-haired man clung to him with all his strength then. "Sanji, I-I love you so much… I tried but I could see it-it wasn't what you needed… I tried my best but it wasn't enough and… I don't know how to do better…"

Saddened by his distress, the cook hugged him back intensely.

"You are one of the bravest men I know, Liam," he assured him, straightening up to wipe the man's tears with his thumb. "You're upright, honest and you have the greatness of mind of those who put the happiness of others before their own. So I may not be the right person for you but one day, I know you'll meet someone who'll love you as much as you deserve. That day, you'll be the happiest in the world."

More tears escaped the scientist and Sanji pulled him against him again, letting him let go of his sorrow without a word for several long minutes.

Finally, Liam regained some control of his emotions and he raised his head to look at the man he loved so much, his eyes reddened. "Can I… Just one last time, please, Sanji…"

The cook leaned forward and kissed him in response. Liam immediately ran his hands through the blond's hair to deepen their kiss and Sanji let him. After a few moments though, Liam slowly pulled away from the blond, his eyes once again brimming with tears. "Thank you…"

While the scientist took deep breaths to try to regain his composure, Sanji nodded and remained still for a moment. He was stunned by the latest events. He was still in shock from his emotions and guilt towards the dark-haired man but an immense serenity also came over him. He had opened his heart and his mind was now allowing him to be at peace with himself. In a strange way, tonight, his path had never seemed so clear.

Happy New Year!

Isn't it a great way to begin this new year for us ZoSan fans?! Poor Liam though… I still hope you enjoyed their relationship for what it was.

Musical inspiration: Tout faux - Maurane

See you next chapter with Zoro (and Luffy).