I wake up to the sounds of bustling echoing from downstairs. I huff and flop over in my bed, pulling up the blankets over me so I'm swallowed in them. It's too early in the morning for this shit, and I did not sleep well last night.

At least breakfast seems to smell good.

I'm just about to drift back off when I hear my door open. It takes me a moment to place the person standing next to my bed but I'm surprised because-

"Mom!"

"Good morning!" she trills. "Did you sleep well last night?"

"Yeah, I guess." I wipe my eyes. "But what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at work?"

"President Glacier suggested I take the next few days off to spend time with you guys. We're in the middle of training some new employees anyway, so they're learning how to manage the operation when I'm not there." Mom doesn't sound too impressed. "Well, let's hope they don't screw things up."

One would guess this might serve as a wake-up call or something. I mean, come on! Even the President of Panem thinks my mom is too much of a workaholic!

I decide not to say that out loud because I don't want to get in trouble. Instead, I just follow my mom downstairs where my dad is busy cooking breakfast. It is nice having the whole family home for a meal for once. I don't remember the last time it's been like this.

Breakfast is awesome. Dad makes giant omelets and loads mine up with cheddar, spinach, and bacon. I slice the egg in half and full it apart to reveal a giant, orange cheesy stretch. Oh yeah. The breakfast of champions right there.

"How about we watch the Games together as a family?" Mom asks. "Wouldn't it be nice to spend some time together?"

I want to make a comment about how her absence is almost always the reason we don't spend time together, but I don't want to start a fight with her. I just nod along because what's the worst that could happen?

A strange feeling settles in my stomach. It's the kind I get when I'm really anxious about something, but I don't even know what to be anxious about. It's fine. Things will be fine. There's a third of the tributes left, and I can just count down the days until these Games are over and I can finally put this all behind me…

Except things don't end with the Games, do they?

No. I don't want to think about the way the rest of my life is going right now. One day at a time. One problem at a time.

Mom and Aquilo are talking in the living room as Mom turns on the TV. "...manufactured drama between the two alliances. It just makes sense from a story perspective!" Mom says. "The ultimate showdown between the dominant Careers and the scrappy outlier underdogs."

"The Careers are totally gonna win," Aquilo declares. "Who even likes Kai's stupid alliance anyways?"

Mom shakes her head. "You'd be surprised, dear."

"Yeah well, I don't like them anymore because they're shoving their stupid sexualities down everybody's throat," Aquilo continues and I feel my hands ball into fists. "What's wrong with those guys?"

"Literally nobody has a problem with it except you," I snarl.

"Hey!" Dad snaps. "Cut it out, both of you."

Nice to know me defending queer people is considered to be on the same level as disruptiveness as my brother being on his bullshit. It feels like a cloud of annoyance has settled over me and it's only getting darker.

I don't want to watch the Games anymore, but I find myself sitting in the living room with my family regardless. I can relate to the grogginess of the Careers as they all shuffle from their slumber and surround the small fire Cyrus is putting together.

Chanel chews on a pack of beef jerky. "So, who's left?"

Cyrus starts counting down something on their fingers. "Just the guys from Three, Seven, and Eight. If I've been keeping track properly."

Gaius scoffs loudly. "Child's play."

Beatrix stands up. "I suggest we all go after them. Five's much stronger than three, and would work better in our favour. Thoughts on that?"

"What will we do after, though?" Cyrus suddenly sounds very uncertain.

Coral is the first to speak up. "It's obvious."

The Career camp falls quiet, the only noise being Gaius dragging a foot across the ground.

"Fine," Beatrix finally says. "We'll cross that bridge when we get to it. Every go grab some weapons. We reconvene in five minutes."

The Careers split up. I hear a small snort and I glance over at Mom, who looks very pleased with themselves. "Took them long enough."

"Huh?" Aquilo asks, voicing my own thoughts. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I've been trying to push the Career pack towards a confrontation with their opposing alliance for a few days now, but things just kept constantly getting in the way." Mom sighs in exasperation. "These new interns are absolutely ridiculous. We could've prevented the slowness of the past few days but nooooo, they want to draw things out."

"Can we stop talking about your work?" I ask. "It feels like that's all you ever mention these days."

"It is not."

"Yeah," Aquilo says.. "It is. I bet you're gonna get eaten by a mutt or something and that still won't stop you-"

Mom holds her hand up to cut him off. "Stop exaggerating, the both of you."

"I wasn't exaggerating," I mumble, but Mom's glare tells me that I'm best off keeping quiet for now. The Careers have reconvened and Beatrix leads the charge.

Cordin sits on a patch of rough grass, munching on a slice of beef jerky. He watches Kai and Shadow, who are snuggled up next to each other. Cordin fiddles with his thumbs and sighs to himself, staring up at the sky.

"What am I doing with my life?" he asks nobody in particular.

I find I agree. Really, what am I doing with my life? Just waiting for things to happen? Just allowing other people to control my future for me because I'm too tired to argue back and stand up for myself? Is that even living, or just going through the motions? I don't want to get married, but why am I not doing anything about it?

I know I'm depressed, and I know I hate it. I know it makes things worse on me. But maybe I can make things just a little bit better for myself.

I glance over at my mom, who appears to be on the edge of her seat waiting for the inevitable showdown. God, she's been working so hard on these Games. Would it disappoint her to find out I can't even appreciate all the effort she's put in? I don't like making her upset. Goodness knows I'm already as much of a failure as I can possibly be. She would be so pissed if she found out the one person she made an entire Games for isn't even happy about it-

"Here they come!" Aquilos squeals as the Careers creep into frame. They close the gap between them and their targets, and Kai and Shadow are somehow still sleeping.

My heart pounds and I feel like I want to vomit as I stare into Coral's unassuming eyes. This might be it. Then the Careers will have to tear themselves apart and I'll spend the rest of my life tethered to someone like Chanel or Cyrus…or even worse, Gaius or Coral. Someone who revels in bloodlust and killing, only viewing me as a prize that accompanies the crown.

What the hell am I doing? I can't carry on like that!

"Mom-" I start to say. "Mom, can I-"

Then the frog appears.

It jumps right in front of the Career pack, towering over all of them. Beatrix jumps in surprise and Coral screams. Gaius slaps a hand over her mouth, but by then it's too late and Cordin looks up in horror.

"Is someone there?"

"You idiot!" Gaius hisses.

"Well, I'm sorry!" Coral snaps back. "How was I supposed to know that there'd be a giant fucking frog in the middle of my way?"

"Can it, you two," Chanel snaps. "The damage is done, and they already know we're here."

"Then, what are we waiting for?" Beatrix asks. "There's three of them and five of us. Let's get a move on."

Cordin frantically shakes Kai awake. "Guys! Guys, it's the Careers! They're here!"

"Wha…" Kai grumbles, wiping his eyes. "Ughhhh, five more minutes…"

"We don't have five more minutes!"

Kai gives Cordin a light shove. Exasperated, Cordin suddenly slaps Kai across the face. Immediately, Kai bolts up and Shadow tumbles off him. "Ow! Dude!"

"Get up! Unless you wanna die!"

"Look at who grew some balls," Shadow mutters, but picks up his shiv anyways. He cackles when Cordin glares at him. "Whatever you say, captain."

"Not funny!"

"This is stupid," Aquilo grumbles. I glance over at him, but a yell diverts my attention back to the TV as Coral and Gaius dash through the grass. Chanel, Cyrus, and Beatrix follow right behind.

Gaius throws himself at Cordin, who quickly dives out of the way and nearly lands on top of Cyrus. Cyrus grabs a handful of Cordin's dark hair and yanks his head backwards.

Kai and Shadow are back to back as the three Career girls circle them. Chanel lunges at Kai who runs forward at her. Her spear misses him entirely as Kai ducks and rams his sword through Chanel's stomach. She suddenly freezes up as Kai yanks his sword free and kicks her in the groin. Chanel stumbles backwards and knocks into Beatrix, both women tumbling to the ground.

There's a loud cry as Cyrus throws Cordin to the ground and charges at Kai's back.

"Kai!" Cordin yells, before Gaius suddenly presses a foot onto his chest, keeping him pinned to the dirt. Kai turns around just in time. "No!" Shadow screams, but by then, it's too late.

Cyrus swings their axe through the air and the blade collides with Kai's head. It cleaves through his hair and blood gushes down Kai's face. For a moment, he just stumbles in place before his eyes become unfocused before he tumbles to the ground.

Shadow lets out a scream of rage and throws himself at Cyrus. He jumps on them, knocking them both over. Shadow climbs on top of Cyrus and throws punch after punch at their face.

"Help me out here!" Cyrus yells.

Beatrix untagles herself from Chanel's trembling body and she and Coral try to yank Shadow off Cyrus. Shadow rams his shiv into Cyrus's side.

Suddenly, Gaius shouts out as Cordin rams a knife through his foot. For a brief moment, Gaius lifts his leg and that's all the leverage Cordin needs to roll out from underneath and give Gaius a hard shove.

Beatrix yanks a snarling Shadow to his feet as Coral slices his throat open into a bright red smile. Shadow chokes on his blood and Coral gives him a hard kick to the side. He collapses right next to Kai.

"Two down," Coral hisses. "One to go!" She sneers at a shaking Cordin. "Give up! Your allies are dead!"

Cordin weakly shakes his head. Then he turns and runs. Coral and Beatrix give chase, Gaius trying to hobble after them. Cyrus weakly stumbles to their feet, blood oozing from the wound Shadow gave him.

Come on, I find myself thinking as Cordin stumbles through the arena. You can do it. Just keep going.

"I see him!" Coral yells, the gap between her and Cordin closing. Cordin turns around and throws his knife as hard as he can. It misses Coral completely, but hits Beatrix in the chest. Beatrix trips as the impact knocks the wind out of her and Cordin keeps running.

Three cannons fire. Coral stops in her tracks and glances back. "Damn it," she mutters.

Gaius finally catches up, staring down at Beatrix. "What happened to her?"

Coral huffs. "Doesn't matter. Asshat got away. What happened to you?"

"He stabbed me in the foot."

"You gotta be fucking kidding me."

"Well, it's not like I-"

Coral sighs. "You had one job. One! And you somehow managed to fuck that up! You and Chanel and Cyrus and Beatrix!" She throws her hands up. "God, it's like I'm the only competent person here. How any of you idiots managed to get chosen for the Games is beyond me."

"It didn't even want to be here in the first-" Gaius is interrupted by two more cannons firing. "Well…shit. You think that was him?"

"I wish it was."

"We still have tomorrow."

Coral flips her hair over her shoulder as she stalks off. "Indeed we do. And I'll prove that I'm more deserving of the crown than anyone else here. You better not think of stealing my kills."

"Wouldn't dream of it, sweetheart," Gaius says sarcastically as he follows her, limping.

A shiver runs down my spine as I watch the Fours head back to the Cornucopia, then survey the bodies left behind. The gory mess, the blood everywhere, the corpses lying in almost unnatural positions. Cyrus has curled up into a small ball, tears and snot clinging to their forever unmoving face. The look of a desolate parent who realizes they aren't coming home to their child. That image will be seared into my mind for a very long time.

All these tributes, all these children who tore each other apart, over me.

I can't do this anymore.

"Tati?" Dad is calling my name. "Tati, honey? Is something wrong?"

"I…" My voice wobbles. I realize my face is wet. Why is my face wet? I wipe my eyes with my arm. Everyone is staring at me.

"I'm fine," I mumble.

Mom doesn't seem convinced. "Clearly, that isn't the case, or else you wouldn't be crying."

"I'm not crying."

"You are!"

"I'm not!" My heart pounds even faster as my voice rises in volume. Stay in control, Tati, stay in control! "Everything's fine! I just…I swear I'm not…"

I'm not…

"Mom, I can't do this."

"What do you mean?"

"I can't…" I want to backtrack, to lie again and insist that nothing is wrong, but it's too late now. "I'm asexual. And aromantic. I don't feel love or attraction. Nothing. I don't want to get married to someone I don't love and never will love. I don't like any of the tributes. I don't like anyone. I can't get married, okay! I can't get married! I can't…I…"

What have I done? I've ruined everything. I've ruined the Games, I've ruined the Quell, I've ruined my parents' trust in me, I've even ruined my life. I drop my head into my hands and squeeze my eyes shut because I can't even think of facing my family right now. It's over, it's all over.

"Oh, honey."

And then a pair of arms are wrapping themselves around me and all I can smell is milkweed; my mom's perfume. "Tati, darling…why didn't you tell us earlier?"

"I didn't want to disappoint you."

"Nothing you could do could ever disappoint me," Mom murmurs. "I wish I had known, and then I wouldn't have subjected you to all of this. You should've let us know before the Games began."

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." It's too late to go back now, isn't it. "But…"

"But?"

"You're never home," I blurt out. "You're always working and everything about you is just Games, Games, Games. I barely see you in person anymore, in fact, I see you more on TV. And even when you are home, you're working. I get you're the Head Gamemaker you're important and all, but it's just…there's a disconnect, you know? To me, you're less 'Mom' and more 'Artemisia Tremblay, Head Gamemaker'."

"I…" Mom falters, glancing over at my dad and Aquilo. "I didn't realize you felt this way."

"I'm sorry," I say again.

"Don't be sorry," Dad suddenly speaks up. "She's right, Art. Maybe it would do you some good to step away from your work for a little bit. I think President Glacier even agrees."

Mom frowns. "That's not true!"

"Is it? Then why do you think she's sent you home?"

That gets a laugh out of everyone, because the idea is a touch absurd. Mom hugs me a second time. I no longer want to vomit, but I still feel scared. Did I just ruin the 150th Hunger Games?

Where do I go from here?

8th: place Chanel Luxardo, District 1. Stomach slashed open by Kai.

7th place: Kai Smith, District 7. Head split open by Cyrus.

6th place: Shadow Kurosaki, District 8. Throat slit by Coral.

5th place: Beatrix Aegis, District 2. Stabbed in the chest by Cordin.

4th place: Cyrus True, District 2. Stabbed in the side by Shadow.

And we're down to the final three! Congrats to Pi, Gaia, and Fiona for all making it this far and thank you to Fiona for sending in Cyrus!

Between Cordin, Gaius, and Coral, who do you think will win? Who do you want to win? What will Tati do now that the cat's out of the bag?

See you all next chapter,

-Vr