Dr. Strange opens her eyes and has to grip the floor to avoid hitting the wall. Bruce wakes up, also having to grip the wall, despite laying down. Natasha and Clint are peering into the room and holding onto the door for balance. The ship continues to shake roughly for another half minute before slowly stopping.
Natasha looks toward Bruce, then turns to Dr. Strange. "That wasn't you guys was it."
Dr. Strange shakes her head, and Bruce does her best to sit up. "I don't think so." she says.
As if to answer their question, the intercom comes on.
"This is the captain Speaking." Talos says. "Could the uhm... The Avengers and party please come up on deck..." There is a momentary pause as he seems to gather his thoughts. "And make it quick." The intercom clicks off. Dr. Strange, Bruce, Natasha, and Thor start looking between each other in worry and confusion.
*** Further up the ship ***
"Fury, what's going on?" Tony asks, spotting his comrade also rushing to the bridge.
"I don't know," Fury responds, "but for Talos to forgo his askew sense of humor, is usually not a good sign. They make their way to the front of the ship and pass through the sliding doors. Vision and Wanda are already there, but no one else seems to have arrived.
"Talk to me." Fury tells Talos.
Talos looks nervous and sweaty, but does not hesitate. "We were approaching the edge of the solar system when all the equipment went haywire. We shut down the engines and were about to run a diagnostic, but then the windows went dark. I thought we were caught in a tractor beam or under the shadow of something when suddenly things cleared up and we were here." Talos points at the front window.
Nick Fury looks out the window to see what looks like a large rock or asteroid. It is so close it takes up the entire window. The door to the bridge opens as a group of others comes and joins them. Fury wants to reprimand them, but is still concentrating on what she is seeing.
"Tony, Commander Fury," Hawkeye addresses them, "what's going on?" Natasha, Thor, Dr. Strange and Bruce enter the control deck shortly afterwards.
Tony looks at Fury equally puzzled. "What are we looking at?"
Nick Fury continues to study the asteroid a little longer before she spots something near the bottom center. "What's that?" She asks, and points. "Zoom in, right there."
Soren hits a few buttons and the windows become a screen which amplifies what they are seeing. There is a collective moment of shocked silence as they now understand what just happened.
"Is that who I think it is?" Nick Fury asks.
"Yes... That's her" Thor responds. "I remember that face very well."
"Thanos..." Tony says, almost in shock.
Thanos is sitting on her throne with her double edged sword swinging lazily in her right hand. Her left hand rests on the arm of the chair bearing the gauntlet. She is smiling lightly and looking directly at the ship, almost as if she can see every single one of them.
Tony turns around and studies the other's for a moment. "Where's everybody else?" He asks no one in particular.
"About that..." Dr. Strange responds. Before she can get another word in, the door opens again and Star-Lord comes rushing in, followed by the Guardians, then T'Challa who is still being supported by Oyoke.
"You've gotta be shitting me!" Rocket shouts, as she looks up at the screen.
Seeing T'Challa in such bad condition, Tony asks her, "What's going on?" The door opens again, and this time, Bucky comes in actually carrying Steve Rogers on her back. Tony does not have time to even get upset because he is now very concerned.
"Is everyone alright?" Nick Fury asks. "What's happened to all of you?"
"It seems," Vision interrupts, "they're menstruating."
"WHAT!?" Tony asks loudly.
"Oh hell no!" Nick Fury says loudly. "Now is not the time for this shit.
"It's not like they can just turn it off." Natasha says, glaring at Nick Fury.
As if in response to their conversation, Bruce's abdomen begins to rumble and she crouches down in pain. "Tony..." she cries out. "I don't know if today is a good day for this."
Tony Stark feels his forehead begin to sweat as he slowly turns back toward the screen. Thanos is still watching them with a wide grin. Even though Tony is 100% positive this is not her fault, he still feels like Thanos planned this.
*** Back on Earth and a few minutes later ***
Peter Parker is curled into a ball and laying on her side. She does not notice as a handful of sparks materialize out of thin air and begin to expand in her room. Pretty soon a portal opens up flooding the room with a lot of noise as Dr. Strange walks through. Peter groans loudly into her pillow.
"Come on Peter, It's time to go." Dr. Strange says.
Peter pulls the pillow away from her face and looks at Dr. Strange in disbelief. "Now?" she asks.
"Yes, now." Dr. Strange responds.
"Can't it wait a bit?" she asks grumpily as she pulls the pillow back toward her face.
"No!" Dr. Strange snaps. She makes a random hand gesture which results in Peter's pillow flying away from her. Peter tries to shoot webbing at the pillow but remembers she isn't wearing the suit as she fails. She resolves to angrily glaring at Dr. Strange. Dr. Strange realizes what is going on quickly and forces herself to calm down. "I'm sorry Peter. I wish we had more time. It really can't wait."
"Whoa!" Aunt May says as she enters the room and sees Dr. Strange standing in front of a very flashy portal. She is holding a pink and yellow box in one hand, and a large blue bag in the other. "Who are you?" She asks before peering at the portal behind Dr. Strange. "Is that Thor?" She asks, now distracted and leaning to the side.
"I'm sorry Mrs. Parker. I know this is not really a good time, " Dr. Strange starts to explain, "but we have to borrow your son."
"Oh, he's not my son." Aunt May responds, still trying to peek through the portal. "He's my nephew." She tries to wave just as Thor looks her way. He does not seem to notice.
"She's my aunt..." Peter verifies before turning her face into another one of her pillows. "Mr. Strange, I don't think now is a good time." She mutters. "I don't know if you've heard..." She starts to tell Dr. Strange.
"Yes, I'm well aware of the biological issues currently at play." Dr. Strange replies.
Peter turns back toward Dr. Strange with teary eyes. "They're calling it the great period."
"They would, wouldn't they?" Dr. Strange asks mostly to herself. "Speaking of which. Are those...?" She gestures toward the items in Aunt May's hands.
Aunt May's attention returns toward Dr. Strange. "Hmm... Oh these?" She raises the two packages. "pads and tampons." She says, seeming a little defensive.
"Do you think we could... take those?" Dr. Strange asks, a little embarrassed.
"What?!" Aunt May shouts. "I had to pay some crazy lady $100 for these! They're sold out everywhere!"
"$100?" Dr. Strange asks, Aunt May nods back in response. Dr. Strange has to take a moment to process the insanity that might be happening on Earth at this moment.
"Look, I know things are hectic down here on Earth," Dr. Strange starts trying to reason, "but you've got to understand, the fate of the universe could literally be determined by those... female products in your hands."
Aunt May looks at the pad and tampons in her hands, wondering if Dr. Strange is really being serious. "Aunt May..." Peter calls out, which causes her to jump.
"Oh, alright." Aunt May says handing the packages over to Dr. Strange. "I sure picked a terrible time to run out of my own personal stash."
"I do apologize, Ms. May." Dr. Strange responds while taking the packages from Aunt May. "Come on Peter, we have to go!" she turns toward her looking rather silly with the pads and tampons stacked in her arms.
Peter groans. "I don't think I can move."
"Oh, that's right." Dr. Strange remembers. "It seems that everyone with super strength is having the same issue." She approaches Peter and hovers a hand above her abdomen. There is a small rush of wind as the area glows for only a moment. Peter stops groaning and takes a deep breath.
"Better?" Dr. Strange asks.
Peter looks up from her pillow, a little surprised. "Yeah..." She responds. "That's a lot better, actually."
"Good, then don't wander too far, because that spell only works in close proximity." Dr. Strange does not waste another moment and begins to walk away, back into the portal.
Peter is unsure if she is imagining it, but she suspects her abdomen pain starts to come back as Dr. Strange moves further away. "Wait!" She says, as she jumps out of bed. She is wearing fluffy yellow pajamas covered with little brown bears. She starts to run through the portal when Aunt May calls out to her.
"Peter!" She shouts. "You forgot this!" She is holding Peter's backpack in the air.
"Oh yeah!" Peter responds. She is about to rush back but Aunt May tosses the pack toward her. "Thank you!" She says as she catches it.
"And Peter!" Aunt May calls out. "Be safe."
"I will Aunt May, and tell MJ I love her." Peter responds. It suddenly occurs to her that she hasn't said it in person yet. "Wait, don't tell her yet!" Peter says as the portal begins to close.
"Bye Peter," May says, "and bye Thor!" She shouts moments before it completely closes.
"Hmm... Is someone calling me?" Thor asks, turning toward Peter.
"Oh, yeah." Peter responds. "Sorry about that. It was my Aunt May. She's a big fan."
"Ah, young Peter!" Thor recognizes her. "It's good to see you again. We didn't really get to talk the other day."
Thor was wearing his usual armor. His currently short hair was brushed and he had recently shaved, preparing for the excitement of battle. Peter couldn't help being intimidated and slightly attracted to his appearance.
"Is she still just waiting?" Nick Fury asks Talos from not far away.
"It would seem so." Talos responds, referring to Thanos. "She seems to want us to make the first move."
"And so we shall." Tony Stark responds, before turning toward the group. "OK, is everyone ready?"
"I'm not ready Mr. Stark!" Peter calls out. "I don't know what's going on."
Tony looks at Peter and suddenly feels a wave of guilt for bringing her along. She is about to encourage her to hurry when she notices her pajamas. "What are you wearing?"
Those that are nearest look toward her, as Peter starts to blush.
"Nice jammies." Natasha says with a smile.
"Is that Rilakuma?" Clint asks, recognizing the character.
Peter looks down at her PJs. "Yeah, I got 'em from my pen pal, in Kyoto."
"In any case." Tony interrupts. "We need you to get changed. We're already here, and we're way ahead of schedule."
"Ahead of schedule?" Peter asks. "How far ahead of schedule are we?"
Tony has already diverted his attention toward the others, but Dr. Strange decides to answer her questions as she finishes handing off the hygiene products toward a couple of Wakandan warriors.
"It seems Thanos was expecting us, and as soon as we entered her space, she teleported us directly to her." Dr, Strange tells Peter.
"She?" Peter asks, as she rummages through her bag for her suit and supplies. "Thanos is a girl now too?"
"Yes." Dr. Strange responds. "Be that as it may, none of us were prepared, and we've had to make some hasty changes to our plans."
"Do we know what she wants?" Peter asks. "I would think she'd want to keep us far away from her." As Peter says this, the nano suit begins to crawl up her arm and cover her. It goes under her pajamas leaving them on the outside. "A direct confrontation seems like a bad idea."
"We aren't sure what she wants." Dr. Strange answers. "Nearly every one of us is certain we're being led right into a trap, but we're going to find out regardless."
Peter is feeling nervous, but nods in response. "What do you need me to do?"
"Peter." Dr. Strange grabs her arms as she addresses her. "If things get hectic, if they get ugly, and we start to lose, I need you to use your sling ring, and start sending people home." Peter can see the dead seriousness in her eyes, and it leaves her speechless. "I'm going to be doing the same Peter. Fighting is our main goal, but keeping people safe and alive is on equal ground. You got that?"
Peter nods, as the seriousness of the situation seems to set in.
"This is very soft by the way." Dr. Strange comments on Peter's pajamas which she is now feeling.
"Isn't it?" Peter asks happily. "I should probably take these off now." She starts to remove them and stuff them into her bag.
"OK, I need everyone's attention!" Tony Stark shouts over the crowd. "It seems the asteroid we've been brought to is terraformed. So there is a healthy level of oxygen and gravity. In just a moment, we are going to attempt to land on the asteroid and confront Thanos."
The others stay silent as Tony speaks.
"It would also appear that she is alone and waiting for us." Tony continues. "But, I would take that with a grain of salt. This asteroid is nearly a quarter the size of our moon. It is surrounded by many other asteroids in very close proximity. There are many places for her troops to hide, and plenty of places for you to get lost. I cannot stress this enough. Stay near the group. Especially those of you with current health concerns." Tony refers to those who are menstruating. "Thanos is a very powerful and very dangerous being, unlike anything any of you has ever fought before."
"Unlike a living planet?" Rocket asks loudly, interrupting Tony.
"Shut up!" Star-Lord snaps at her. "Not now." Rocket just shrugs her shoulders.
"Is that a Racoon?" Peter asks Dr. Strange, not expecting a response.
Tony Stark grumbles, but waits till he has their attention again. "Look, my point is! Thanos is too dangerous to take on alone. She is too dangerous to take on in a small group. She has taken on nearly half of us, and we could only slow her down." The others are clearly listening now. "If we want to beat her, it has to be all of us. It may seem impossible, but I truly believe together we can do this."
The room grows very quiet as everyone soaks in the information.
*clap*... *clap*.. *clap*
Several of the avengers turn around to see Drax, still topless, slowly clapping. Her breasts jiggle with each clap. Mantis sees this, smiles, and starts clapping happily also. Everyone is very confused.
"Drax! Mantis!" Star-Lord calls with a frustrated sigh. "This is not a slow clap moment!"
"But I thought..." Drax starts to protest.
"NO!" Star-Lord snaps.
"Who are those guys?" Peter Parker asks, still very confused. Natasha and Clint shake their heads and snicker to themselves.
"At least they lightened the mood a bit." Clint says, pulling out his retractable bow.
"Alright, we're moving in now." Nick Fury shouts over the crowd.
*** On Sanctuary ***
Thanos watches the familiar arc ship, which she gifted to the Asquardians, sit idle in space. It surprised her a little to see it again. She did not expect the inhabitants to head to Earth. It explained why they had arrived so early. She was beginning to wonder how much longer she would have to wait until they made a move when the ship began to approach.
Thanos makes no moves in response to the arc ships landing. She wants them to know that she is no threat, at the moment. It impresses her that they are brave enough to even get as close as they are getting. She can feel the heat and air from the engines reaching her, but chooses to stay seated.
It takes some time for the ship to settle, but when it does the engines are cut and she can hear the tick of cooling metal as it adjusts to the temperature. It does not take long for the bay door to open.
Thanos stays seated, but leans forward to watch the occupants exit the ship. She immediately recognizes Tony near the front. She is having a hard time recognizing several others, but is sure one of the males is Nebula. She recognizes Spider-Man from Titan, and smirks lightly when she spots Thor. 'There he is.' She thinks to herself. 'I'm going to have to stall to find out who is who.'
She realizes several of them are wearing the same armor as Tony, and sees a few faces she definitely hadn't seen before. There are definitely not enough people to accommodate for the numbers Super Giant had given her. 'They must be sending out their big guns first.' She wonders. 'No matter.' She thinks, standing up as they finally get close enough to converse.
"I imagine you are all wondering why I brought you here." Thanos says, buying time.
"We know why we're here!" Star-Lord snaps.
"Kick ass! Take ass!" Mantis snaps, almost getting it right. Rocket growls, while Groot prepares to fight.
"The boyfriend." Thanos says, sweetly. "I didn't expect to see you again, and with my daughter... I mean son, no less." She peers at Nebula and smiles. "It's not too late, you know. You can still come back to me." She offers. "I'd welcome you back, in open arms like any loving mother would do."
"You make me sick!" Nebula responds. Drax reaches out and squeezes his hand. It seems to calm Nebula, and legitimately surprises Thanos a little.
She looks toward the others. She recognizes Dr. Strange by the cape. "The wizard. I have to thank you for this opportunity."
"Don't thank me yet." Dr. Strange replies. "This still isn't over."
"Enough with the chit chat!" Tony Stark shouts. "We didn't come here to talk! We came here to fight, and take back those stones." He gestures toward the gauntlet.
Several more of the Avengers go on guard now, and Thanos recognizes the red energy emanating from Wanda's hands. 'There you are!' She thinks. 'And you're with the android as well. How touching.'
Thanos continues to study the group, but does not see the last person she was concerned about. 'Perhaps they didn't bring him.' She wonders. Her eyes wander toward Mantis, but she is certain that he's not who she is looking for.
"Very well." Thanos says aloud. "We may as well get started." She turns back and lazily picks up her double bladed sword. She looks back at the others without so much as a concern.
"I suppose, you might be wondering why I brought you directly to me." Thanos tells the crowd. She can see Thor's eyes beginning to glow and knows he might attack at any second. "I also expect you have many questions." She smiles as she says this. "As does the rest of the universe."
Thor starts trying to push his way to the front of the crowd, getting a few of them riled up. Steve Rogers looks back and raises her hand. "Hold!" She says. Thor and the others pause. Her authority does not go unnoticed by Thanos.
"You must be the Captain?" Thanos asks. "I forgot, Tony wasn't the leader." She smiles at Captain America now. "It's nice to finally meet you."
"What do you want?" Captain America asks.
Thanos smiles, grateful for her patience. She really does hate when she gets interrupted. "I want to show you... I want to show the whole universe actually," Thanos pauses for effect, "I want to show everyone what they are up against." Thanos replies. The group seems to calm a little as they are wondering what exactly she is getting at.
Thanos begins to pace sideways. "I could have let you wander aimlessly across my realm looking for me and my army, wasting resources, and dealing with my troops little by little, until you had nothing left but fading hope. But, what good would that have done? Someone else would come, and then others, and then more after that. An entire universe of planets, angry both at what I have done, what I plan to do, and very single one of them fueled by the terror of what I am capable of doing."
Thanos pauses to let her words settle in.
"Or, I could settle this now." Thanos says with a grin that almost completely resembles her male semblance. "The reason I brought you all here is so I can show the universe what they are truly up against. To show them, there is no hope, as I crush Earth's mightiest heroes." Despite talking to the Captain, Thanos locks eyes with Tony. "I brought you here, to make an example out of you, for anyone who thinks they have a chance at stopping the inevitable!"
Tony feels the heavy threat of existential dread fill the air, and he is suddenly hit with the urgent desire to study their surroundings, but he is too terrified to look away. 'What is she planning?' He wonders.
Captain America raises her fist high in the air, so the others can see it. It's clear she does not want to waste any more time talking. "Avengers!" She shouts. Everyone prepares to charge. "Assemble!"
All the Avengers, and Guardians activate their armor and begin to charge forward. Thanos' grin grows wider with mischief as she raises her gauntlet and points it at the small fastly approaching army.
In less then a second they are all engulfed by purple smoke, and everyone except both Tony Stark and Captain America vanishes. The two leaders stop in their tracks, and start looking around for the others. When it becomes apparently clear that they are completely alone, both Captain America and Tony Stark look directly at each other in fear.
"Shit!" Steve Rogers says.
"Language..." Tony Stark barely manages to whisper back.