Chapter 9

Letters from the east

Years went swiftly again for me, the routines of training my brothers. Helping my Nana and Ada out with whatever tasks they needed doing and also being a part of the gatherings and feasts/parties in the valley and doing activities with them made time pass. Elladan and Elrohir grew more and more and the little jokesters soon became big jokesters, formidable fighters, and very good at playing instruments. I was a very proud big sister indeed.

After the morning bath and getting dressed, I had breakfast with the family, and the twins were as eager as always for their training to continue. It had been comical at first to see them try and wield the blades, shoot a bow, and handle a long spear (not that I was any better when I started). But for their age, they were really taking to it. We said goodbye to Nana and ada and left the dining room, and started walking down the hall when I saw Lindir at the end of it.

"My lady," he said and was in his stoic steward way of acting and gave me the typical elven greeting. "And the little lords" he added. They huffed and puffed at it as if they were not so little anymore.

"What can I do for you, Lindir," I said questionably as after the twins got older, Ada had fully taken back up his role as lord of Imladris, and my duties didn't really get me in touch with him a lot unless it was something very special going to happen or some unforeseen situation arising.

"From the woodland realm, my lady," he said with a smile on his face and handed me a thick stack of letters.

"Ohh my" was all I managed to say.

"Lindir, can you inform lord Glorfindel that I won't be a part of the training session today?" I said as my eyes could stop looking at the letters.

"We can do it," Elrohir said with eagerness. "Is that all from the elf you told us about?" Elladan added.

"I do not know, but I will tell you later if it is," I said with a smile like I had not had on my mouth for years.

"Now hurry off, or Glorfindel will not be happy," I said and rushed them on their way, to their dismay.

Lindir said goodbye, too, and I rushed to my room.

I looked over the letters, and the oldest of them were from right after the woodland realm elves had arrived back in their king's halls.

Dear lady Elwen

I do not know if I am able to send this letter at once, but I will as soon as I am able. I wanted to thank you from the bottom of my heart for the treatment, kindness, and love you and your mother showed me when I was visiting your valley. I have not laughed so well for many years since my family died. My king is sending me and my troop south in the morning to look over the old elven fortress there. We did abandon it many many years ago, but we still keep a lookout for it.

Your friend

Tauriel.

So she did have a good time with us, that is great. But sadly, she did not truly write about her and me. Maybe she only sees me as a friend. Looking over the letters I pull out the next one.

Returned home

We stayed in the old elven fortress for many long months. At that time, we did not do much, but hunt, talk, and think. Oh, Elwen, I did a lot of thinking.

I cannot stop thinking of the time with you in Imladris and that of our nana and Adar. You all were kind and took this Silvan elf under your wing, and I cannot truly understand why. I am not saying I did not enjoy it as I did, but I do not understand why you did so.

I wish we had more time together before we had to return. The stars here do not seem as bright as they did with you in Imladris. The time in Amon Lanc is hard on me as the skies are so clear, but to me, they are just so very grey.

The prince talked to me as I forgot what time it was and he said he saw me as sadder then I had been before. He is a good friend and very kind for being so to me as those of his rank rarely care for us low elves. I do not know what id do without his comfort.

Your friend

Tauriel

Ohh Tauriel, I do think about you too, and the stars do shine less bright after you left. The world is a greyer place I find it without you, I was thinking to myself. But Legolas, why is he taking an interest in you? I hated the idea of him taking her, but then he was close to her and I was a world away.

I looked over several more letters and found them lovely, caring, and even sad, she did have a hard time during the later letters, and she did not feel she was at home in the woodland realm anymore. Sadly, sending letters when one is a very low-ranked Silvan ranger is not easy, even in times of peace. I so wish we were able to send letters.

Meeting with the king

I and a few other Silvan ranges were given medals for bravery in fighting the spiders that has come up from the south. It was a lovely moment and even if I felt so proud I wish you were here to see it. The other elves had their families here and I too had my kin in battle around me, but it was not the same. I felt so alone even if the King, queen and prince tried to talk to me and be supportive. In my heart so much has changed and I do feel estranged here Elwen. It is like I do not fit in anymore... One day i hope to feel at home again.

Tauriel

The last letter that was in the bunch really caught my eye.

Home no more

Dear Elwen. I do wish we had been able to write all these years. Life in the woods has become hard for me, the days feel long, lifeless, and of no joy to me. Patrols were exciting before. It sent a rush in my body to see everything that could be seen, the change in the woods, the smells of it the animal life, and even the simplest of bird songs.

But not anymore. To me, the world feels dark and cold, like a winter night without a star. Even when I am sent to Amon Lanc I do not feel happiness or joy. No matter the number of stars I can see. No amount of birds that sing or plants that grow.

I miss our walks, I miss our talks, I miss your laughter and your smile. For the more, I think of it, that brought me more joy than any other thing I have seen, felt, or heard.

I know how naïve it sounds. Not only because we spent such a short time together, but you are also an elleth. How rare is that not in our kin's history that we fall for each other? Yet I cannot stop to dream of it. How can it even be love for the same reason, Elwen You did spark something in me.

The other reason is our stations. You are a lady of the Noldor elves. Me a silvan ranger. No not a silvan ranger no more. I have decided to see the world and I have left the service of my king. The world I want to see, and hopefully, we will meet again as friends. Please do not be distressed by my thoughts of you. I know my feelings cannot be returned or that we are allowed to explore them if you are so willing.

May the grace of the Valar be with you, Elwen.

Tauriel.

Reading the last letter, tears formed in my eyes over how she felt, how she struggled in her life, and for myself to hate that I did not try and send her letters myself. If nothing else, they could have been good for her. Now she is just in sadness. I truly did not believe she wanted to be in contact with me as Estelwen's letter was not answered. It must have been lost!

Looking at the date of the last letter, it was written just before I sent my own for her with Ada's letters to Thranduil.

I got up and out of my bed to my balcony as the wind grabbed my long dark hair, a tear in my chin as I looked out over the valley.

Where are you, Tauriel? Where have you gone?