"Stede Bonnet, Pirate Captain."
"[Israel] 'Izzy' Hands. This isn't over, Mister Bonnet."
"Good, because I kind-of enjoyed it."
"You're a fucking lunatic, and I like it."
It's storytime on the Revenge. Captain Bonnet, the latest up-and-coming pirate whose name is speedingly being bestrewn across the sea, adores a white and rose-gold getup that unknowingly displays his wealth. Sitting on a barrel and holding a lantern, he's telling his crew a story during Tellin' it Through like a Crew that's surprisingly not being met by them this time. The renowned Blackbeard — though perhaps that's bygone; nowadays, it's more Salt-n-Pepper-beard — sits alongside him, and it's noticeable that the captain enchants the leather-wearing man. Blackbeard reveals to the masses something called the Kraken, a mythical beast he embodies when he spirals downwards, and the revelation motivates the Revenge Crew.
They're cackling and having a good time, and that's cool and all, but it's not going forth with the damned Plan. Don't believe me? Ask Blackbeard's highest-ranking men as they blend into the shadows and consult about their superior. These men met Bonnet before their boss and haven't established their views about him. A few days ago, there wasn't such a thing as a Stede Bonnet or a Revenge Ship, and the next, the man, his first-mate-slash-navigator and the rest of the losers have suddenly run their fucking ship aground with two British hostages. That has heads turning.
In all of the decades on the water, Izzy has never met another specimen like Stede-fucking-Bonnet. But that's OK, though, because he's going to shut this shit down before it becomes something that it isn't.
From the shadows, Fang asks, "Is the plan off?"
Ivan, too, considers the Plan to be rescinded now that the Boss Man is in cahoots with the adversary, but you bet your fucking ass it isn't. Izzy's eyes haven't deterred from scrutinizing his boss, and it definitely hasn't escaped the twat and his soft-looking curly hair and massive thighs as he remains on top of the barrel, but they don't need to know that. He responds, "The Plan is very much alive. He promised me."
And, just like that, we're back on course: The Dog will be terminated. That's it; that's the Plan. Believe me now? In the stillness of the night as the Revenge sleeps, Izzy, Fang, Ivan, and Blackbeard formulate a theatrical demonstration for the subsequent morning. As sunrise hits, the Revenge's first-mate, Buttons, is the first to rouse, and as he heads to the helm, he's automatically met with uncommon fog. Karl automatically chimes an alarm to announce the crew as his owner strolls to the captain's quarters to report to his captain.
The crew is in disarray as they are abruptly awakened, and what's transpiring before them doesn't seem probable or true-to-life. Next, there's lightning and fireworks masked as explosions, and it's all going well. Blackbeard's crew gets a Gold Star for terrorizing the Revenge Crew; let's all give them a round of applause. As such, Blackbeard himself is having a funky, good time as his crazy ass hops all over the deck and from its railings and shit.
From the background, Izzy monitors and records how this façade isolates the liabilities from the combatants — and how Bonnet isn't daunted in the slightest with his smooth, lavender-absorbed sleeping gown and honest-to-god, "rather exquisite cashmere" robe, or whatever he called it, as he assumes leadership with his too-bright beam. If anything, the blondie is mesmerized by the illusion — or the Art of Fuckery, as Blackbeard anoints.
Goddammned it. This isn't supposed to conclude with an exchange of subterfuge. The Art of Fuckery to Theater of Fear? What the hell even is that? No, this just won't do. Earlier, Izzy had to rise the steps leading to the helm to get a better view since he's short and couldn't fully see over the broad shoulders of Bonnet's pitiful excuse for a crew. He won't admit such a thing, but the new standing delivered a sufficient front-row seat to the mayhem on deck, and he may have emitted a laugh or two that was quickly evaporated in the commotion. There's no evidence, so the accusation won't hold in court.
The crew is returning to regular broadcasting, and the central prey, the ship's captain, escapes unmarked. Izzy pushes off of the wall because this won't do. As he moves to confront his boss, he descends the steps and strains every ounce of his being not to dart at Bonnet. For the most part, he's triumphant, but the nonchalant liveliness of the ship's captain unnerves him, so he ganders his way and calls him Dog.
Stede dismisses the nickname with a hair flip, and Izzy's breath hitches.
[Mistake #1].
At face value, Bonnet is disinterested in Hands and whatever his short-but-mighty tenacity presents. Plowing the blade into the shorter man's cheek in the island's forest had surfaced something unexplored and malignant in him. Reminiscing about it, he wished that he had seized the man's throat from behind and dragged him into the forest to perform immortal things to him. After accepting that he murdered Nigel, the bloody, barbarous temperament of pirating has thrilled him. Granted, he's still in the training phase of the new profession, yet he does have the spirit, the others will give him that.
In Spanish Jackie's, it bore every hair follicle not to aggressively bulldoze the shorter man against the wall and inch his blade into the man's skin, his white, pristine suit be damned. If that were the matter, he and Lucius would've matched as he debuted and departed the bar along with his British hostage and someone else's blood smeared on him. If the dwellers and fellow pirates hadn't known his name before, they surely would've known it after that hypothetical fiasco.
Imagine it: The Gentleman Pirate Roughhouses Blackbeard's First-Mate, Israel Hands in Spanish Jackie's! — or something like that. Eh, well, you get the point and can deem that that would be insufficient for business.
Currently, there's a slight modification of objectives. Edward Teach (in his Blackbeard getup) sought to meet Stede Bonnet; just a few days ago, he got the opportunity to do just as such when he rescued the stabbed and near-death man and his crew, then proceeded to invade his ship. You see, this is where the whole Plan — the ol' yadda-yadda scenario with massacring Bonnet and his crew and stealing the captain's identity — thing comes from before Blackbeard got cold feet and became unexpectedly smitten.
Unfortunately, the golden-haired man has yet to have the full-on Blackbeard moment he pursues. Well, he technically kind-of got it if cosplaying the other counts as such while he was wounded. Under those immaculate curls and optimistic mindset, there may be something otherworldly with all that unseeable strength and muscle. It's farfetched to assume otherwise, viewing his passe of seapersons who are more proficient and adept at piracy than he is, chose to join his unit. He did something to convince them to become the Revenge's Crew.
The Gentleman Pirate. Perhaps it's just a personification, like Blackbeard and his Kraken.
Consider it: Edward Teach has two personalities: Blackbeard and the Kraken, each more destructive than the previous one.
Now, with that, consider this: Stede Bonnet with one personality (that's known, thus far): The Gentleman Pirate. The gentleman feature is a ruse he portrays; nonetheless, exhibiting the killing with kindness thing doesn't make one less of a killer, no-matter which way you construe the moniker. Even so, he already has blood on his hands.
What a fascinating man with various layers. It's unsurprising why Edward and Izzy are captivated by him.
Speaking of Edward and Izzy, they're near the helm. The Boss Man studies the water as Izzy approaches.
"I'll happily end it," proffers Izzy as he grasps the ropes to the shrouds, his eyes roaming the side profile of his captain.
"No," begins Edward with a deepened frown, "it's my mess. I'll do it, maybe while he's doing something he loves."
This is where Stede is underestimated. The man had his ship precisely constructed to the finest integrity, with blueprints and schematics that contained hidden passages and concealed rooms that even his crew hadn't accidentally discovered. As of now, one has already been revealed to his new... friend... Ed, who doesn't work for Blackbeard but is Blackbeard: An auxiliary wardrobe, which possesses substitute garments to his primary wardrobe.
Now that that's established, the likelihood of him unwillingly overhearing Edward and Izzy's discussion is slime-to-none. Specifically, because they're exposed, and if they really wanted to talk business, the most efficient route would've been to have a dinghy out on the water to eliminate prying eyes and eavesdroppers. The prestige of Blackbeard and his three-men crew heightened, thinking they could defeat a ten-men crew by including the captain. Bonnet has seapersons who specialize in different areas; moreover, more than half of his crew are warriors like Jim, Oluwande, Wee John, Roach, Frenchie, and even Black Pete, who used to run with Blackbeard and his former squad.
The Revenge captain suspected that there was something to Black Pete's narratives, and it was virtually confirmed when the said man was the individual target of backhands, blows, and other punishment by Izzy, Fang, and Ivan.
Stede and Lucius exit the corridor that leads to the captain's quarters. The scribe-slash-right-hand man tots his notebook as he just aided his captain in dressing in his luxurious, pink-and-white attire. They're standing in the shade near the mast, noting their comrades' enthusiasm and their guests' rich voices. They're not listening, per se, but Stede does walk near the left staircase and gazes at Edward and Izzy. Lucius is behind him, the boy's head peeking on the other side of his face.
Edward and Izzy lack awareness because now their brief discussion is met by the last person they'd want to overhear it. Lucius's eyes widen, and he inwardly gasps as he recognizes who they're chatting about. Stede swiftly pivots, puts his left hand over the boy's mouth, and raises his right hand in a quiet manner with a shake of his head. Next, he tugs the boy through the door that leads to another hallway and softly pushes him against the wall.
The scribe releases a breath, then shakingly points over his captain's shoulder with his quill, "They're talking about you!"
Stede nods his head while pressing his lips together. Then, he declares, "Yes, I'm aware."
"Why aren't you as bewildered as I am? They want to kill you, captain," reasons Lucius with a scowl.
The captain ganders down the hallway at nothing to earn time for his comeback. Finally, he expresses, "It's under the umbrella of piracy. Not too long ago, my crew wanted to mutiny me, which I haven't forgotten about. I murdered a Badminton and imprisoned two Britishmen; I'm sure I'll pay my dues for that sooner than later."
"I've actually spoken to them about that. Out of all of the pirates, you're by far the best there is," compliments the boy.
"Oh, I don't know about that. We've only been together for a few weeks, and our — my — first raid was a damned plant. There's no need to pull my leg, Lucius, though I thank you for your efforts," reckons Stede with a closed-lip smile.
The younger man goggles at his captain for a beat too long, then aggressively plows into his face and declares, "You know, I'm actually disappointed in you right now. I, for one, know you far more intimately than the others, and I know that there's another side of you that you're concealing. Beneath those fancy, rich boy outfits is someone who knows far more than he lets on. I won't stand here and have my captain pathetically recoil because he favors those two men out there. Do something about it!"
The scribe-slash-right-hand sucks his teeth with a dissatisfied shake of his head as the older man idles before him, then moves to move through the door. However, before he can do so, he's roughly shoved against the wall so forcefully that he drops his notebook and quill. A forearm quickly presses against his throat, and there's significant pressure behind it. The wood digs into the back of his head, and he releases a series of grunts and whimpers, his eyes squeezed shut, and his teeth clenched.
"You best mind your tongue, boy," cautions Stede in a deep voice. He applies more pressure to the boy's throat and sickeningly grins as the youngster's face turns red and blue.
Lucius opens his eyes and goggles at the newly-found blaze of his captain. The man before him is a changed man, there's no doubt. He chastises in a whisper, "They've gotten to you. What have they done to you?"
The comment rattles Stede, who appears to snap from his reverie. He inhales sharply and steps back as if he's been scorched. He blinks his eyes quickly and then readjusts his cravat. Suddenly, and wordlessly, he darts out of the door in a frenzy.
Bonnet returns to the deck and hinders in the shadows for a beat or two, then proceeds to shift into the gentleman that he is. He takes a deep breath, casts that lopsided, dimple-infused smile he has, and then treks up the staircase leading to the helm.
"Oh, there you are!" he brightly voices, "Hey, according to Buttons, we should cross paths with a Dutch merchant ship tomorrow night. I thought we could take it through a bit of Fuckery!"
Edward shakes his head in turndown, and denies, "Oh, mate, that's a bit advanced for you. A good Fuckery takes ages to develop.
Stede continues his act by putting on a front of unhappiness, his lips downturned, and a frown coating his facial features.
Izzy surprisingly vocalizes, causing Stede to turn his head towards the older man mutely. The first-mate fends, "As much as I hate to admit it, Captain Bonnet's theatrical instincts are finely honed. He's more than up for the challenge."
The ship's captain looks astounded, then gives his appreciation before excitedly leaving, "Well, thank you. Maybe I've misjudged you. Let's do it!"
Edward and Izzy now have a slight sense of awareness as they whisper their genuine opinions about Stede still being unprepared for the next step of piracy.
"It's time, Edward. Send him to Doggy Heaven," rings Izzy as his boss looks after his new attraction.
[Mistake #2].
"Funny thing is: I'm two steps ahead of you," murmurs Stede to himself with a frightening grin plastered on his face as he returns to his quarters. His room has five disguised compartments, and he briskly saunters to a specific one that's near his bed. Behind the left curtain that encloses his bed shelters a wall that, when specifically pressed, opens to uncover a stockpile of... weapons, both for an opponent and a lover. Lowly, he hysterically cackles with a shake of his head, then roams his hand over his stowed equipment.
"I'm a weak-hearted, soft-handed, lily-livered little rich boy, huh? I'm fat; I'm soft; I'm weak. I'm—" he recounts harsh critiques made to him in the past, which continues for some time. As he does so, he remains caressing his established, lethal equipment collection that'll turn the world upside down for a wealthy fellow from Barbados.
His hands conclude on his kusari-fundo, a Japanese-styled chain with a weight block on the ends. He pauses his tribulation and articulates with self-awareness as he ceases the weapon in his hands, "Oh, Edward and Israel, you're just in time for the fun."