Chapter XVII: Court

Weiss was very adamant that they not speak without a lawyer present before they split apart. The marine who sat across from her was a middle aged man. He had salt and pepper hair to match his five-o-clock shadow. Hidden behind a pair of sunglasses, she could feel his cold and condemning gaze. Seemingly unfazed by it, she was more concerned about the stench from the cigarette that hung loosely from his mouth. The size of the dimly lit room did her little service to dissipate the smoke.

"You sure you don't want to say anything? It'll be a while before anyone shows up and this will go a whole lot faster if you just answer." Weiss countered his gaze with a far more superior version of it. "Fine, I gave you a chance."

He pulled his feet from the table and marched over to the door. Yanking it open and stepping outside, he left her alone in the room. As time passed by, she stared blankly ahead at the wall. She might have been left alone, but she wasn't fool enough to forget that there would be those watching her beyond the one-way mirror.

Eventually, the door opened again. She steeled herself to be questioned once more, but in walked Winter. So overcome with relief, Weiss sighed and let her shoulders sag a bit. She was still being watched, but Winter was here to help.

"I trust you haven't told them anything?" Winter asked.

"Of course not," Weiss responded. "They're such terribly leading questions that I'm insulted they tried."

"Good. For now, just keep your head low. We're unsure what is going on, though it seems one of those present at the scene reported the incident to a separate base. It is likely a misunderstanding that will resolve itself promptly, and the worst that could be done would be incriminating yourself when there is no crime."

The conversation flowed smoothly from there touching on what Winter could speak on and avoiding what she couldn't. Some of what she was permitted to know surprised Weiss, but she hardly argued. Her sister was a ray of light in this murky situation.

The brush kept getting caught in knots, yanking her head along with it. She gritted her teeth and powered through. The marine stared at the young lady who had deep red eyes, wild mane, and a snarl.

"M-miss, would you p-please put the brush down? You're not allowed to —" He gulped as the eyes zeroed in on him. "Nevermind. So, uh, why did you —" There was a sharp knock on the door. Whether or not he had been a man of faith before, he thanked those who were watching over him. Yet somehow, when he opened the door, the woman on the other side made him feel worse.

Goodwitch took his hesitation as permission to enter. Striding past her, she sat across from Yang. When the girl looked up, she tried to compose her. It was ultimately a failure, but the presence that was Glynda seemed to outweigh her rage.

"Miss Xiao Long, I apologize for this and ask that you be patient as we sort it out. I want to be very clear that if this does not go in our favor, it would not be your fault — any of yours — but rather it would be that of those who gave the orders. If a blame is made, it will not fall onto you. That being said, the government here is very adamant about how this will play out, so you must put up with it for now."

"Miss Nikos, I do not believe anyone in particular is at fault."

Pyrrha was upset at Ozpin's words. "I just don't see why they arrested us and not the pirates."

He gave her a lengthy silence, forcing her to sit in her statement. "I was under the impression that those 'pirates' were your friends; are they not?"

She averted her gaze guiltily. That wasn't what she had been trying to imply, but she couldn't really deny what she had said. "I just meant that between those clearly marines and the ones they were fighting, they sided against their own people."

"I understand that, and I believe that they had been misinformed." Pyrrha took the hint in his tone to listen carefully. "One of those from the scene fled and reported to a local marine base. It is my theory that they heavily skewed the situation to paint a poor picture. It may have seemed a viable option at the time, but it was flawed. Their argument will easily fall apart the moment it's presented: there's no need to worry."

"What if they hire someone else who can do the same? If they convinced a marine base that their own were criminals, can they not find someone to defend them in court?"

Ozpin gave her a bitter look. "I take no particular pleasure in this, but it is in our favor. Your friends have no possible way of affording an attorney. I'm afraid they'll be representing themselves."

"Vile fiends!" Nora yelled as they were escorted to a collective cell. Pyrrha winced wondering what sort of interrogator she had received. Weiss subtly moved Yang away so they couldn't conspire; they would be a bad influence on each other no .

Yang plopped down onto the small cot attached to the wall. Just before they got in there, she managed to get one of the guards to grab her a bottle of water. Something about basic human rights. By the bars, Nora looked like some sort of hardened criminal with her arms through them and the scowl on her face. Weiss stood in the center of the room, impatiently tapping her foot and too disgusted to touch anything. Ultimately, Pyrrha surrendered to the situation. It wasn't as though there was much they could do.

Nora grabbed onto the bars like she wanted to bend them with her bare hands, and Pyrrha felt that she might be able to. "How long until we can get out of this mangey place?"

"That depends," Weiss responded. "It's not as though they can easily place us on house arrest, so we'll likely be here until the hearing. That could take months or longer."

"Months?" The statement was surprising enough to draw Yang's attention from her task. "You're saying we could be here for months?"

"It's a very real possibility," Weiss confirmed bitterly.

"We just have to go along for now," Pyrrha added. "And there's something else we need to discuss."

"Did you get all of that?" Neptune furrowed his brow but nodded nonetheless. Franky was going over some points with him, and it was all honestly jarring. He went from a pirate on the side of the marines to betraying them and joining the pirates they were arresting. How could he possibly resist free internet? Then more marines showed up and he expected to get arrested, but they arrested the marines that were there to arrest them, but not — okay, that was confusing. Moving on, Franky, a hulking man he had just met, brought him over after their statements and went over some important stuff regarding how they were the prosecution and not the defense. It was insane to ask if he had gotten it all, but luckily it was neatly written down for him too.

He was looking over it all once more when Franky's responder snail started going off. Neptune ignored it for reviewing the information, but Franky's curse stole his attention.

"Shit," he looked like he wanted to throw the snail across the room. "Look kid, someone pulled some strings. The trial's tomorrow now."

The night before the trial passed quickly for the Straw Hats and Sun and Neptune. Jaune got up earlier than he ever had in his entire life, and he wasn't alone in that regard. On the other hand, team PWNY had a horrible night. The news that Ozpin successfully, and impressively, rushed the case was appreciated, but wasn't enough to balance everything else.

Their argument, one that Pyrrha had both raised and put her foot down on, persisted into the morning after sleep. Those near their path stopped to see the sight of an unstoppable force against an immovable object. After Pyrrha learned that their friends would be representing themselves, she felt that they should do the same. Ozpin tried to talk her out of it, but honor and friendship would not let her waver. Weiss was adamant that it was a horrible idea. Late into the night, Weiss debated persistently, but Pyrrha countered with short, stubborn responses. Supposedly, the decision had already been made and they couldn't do anything about it anymore.

Yang would have played mediator, understanding both sides, but a slow, burning rage made her abstain. Sure, the image of her sister getting bullied by a professional hurt, but the one of the boy who messed up her hair getting the same was satisfying.

The doors opened ominously and they were escorted to their place. Pyrrha looked over to see Jaune who was staring ahead with a look of determination on his face. The others were distracted by two different things. First was the large man with a blue pompadour. It was his attire that drew their attention: a sleek tux suit, a black speedo with the text 'formal' on the front, and what looked to be a pair of black, polished flip flops.

The second thing they noticed was Nora walking over to the prosecutors. Weiss tried to stop her and Yang went to grab her arm, but the marines that escorted them forcefully stopped Yang and someone had the gall to shush Weiss.

Yang was still sputtering in anger that Nora wasn't stopped when the gavel struck. "All rise!" In one motion, those around the room stood in near unison. The judge did not appear quite like any of them imagined. The long, curled powder wig barely concealed a garish bowl cut that draped over his sharp eyes. Just under those, he wore a jade eyeshadow in an odd, spiky pattern. It matched what seemed to be a natural blush and the heart shaped lipstick he wore, a mirror to his cleft chin. That all paled in comparison to the two distinct swan heads that protruded from his black judge's gown.

"We are here to witness the trial of the Straw Hats and Super Franky Building Co. versus team PWNY, charged with…" the list went on for an uncomfortable amount of time, including: assault, trespassing, emotional distress, damage of property, entrapment, unlawful feeding of seagulls, and abuse of power. As the judge continued on, Pyrrha went gaunt. When had the trial become this? Why had the trial become this? How was she, someone who didn't know anything about law, going to defend against this? Why did the judge have swan heads in his outfit?

She did her best to calm down, ignoring Weiss' eyes boring into the side of her head. She put on the mask she wore for cameras and began preparing herself. They were in the same boat as the prosecution, so it shouldn't be that difficult.

"You may all be seated." The judge finally wrapped up the list. "Prosecution, please state your case."

Pyrrha honestly expected Jaune to be the one representing them, or maybe Franky since he was an adult. She hadn't thought about the latter being a possibility when she made her choice, but it was still there. Neptune was who walked out before the court.

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, what occurred not too long ago was a severe abuse of power and disregard of law. In broad daylight, there was a blatant assault on innocent civilians before Pyrrha Nikos, Weiss Schnee, and Yang Xiao Long trespassed onto and destroyed the private property of Miss Nora Valkyrie." Nora's land — that was Nora's land? The mask Pyrrha was wearing became more strained, and Weiss was in a similar position.

Yang was apparently incapable of that. "Objection! There's no way Nora could have owned the land!"

The gavel struck down. "Overruled, Miss Xiao Long. That is not a proper objection in any form. Another outburst like that and I'll see you removed from my courtroom." Yang did her best to compose herself, but she was still visibly upset.

Neptune nobly pushed on. "So far, there have been serious accusations about the innocence of our group; however, when proper evidence is looked at, they all fall apart. To begin, the primary accusations involve both the students' departure from Beacon and the early trespassing onto a marine ship for the theft of a log pose.

"The former in all reality was self-defense. Beacon, an academy in Vale, does not hold the right to hold a person against their will. What happened during that time is that Jaune, along with a group of fellow students, decided to drop out. Instead of allowing this and accepting their departure, the staff at Beacon and military from Atlas used force to keep the students against their will and inhibit their later actions. Now, feeling as though they were trapped, they were forced to resort to aggressive means of escape; even then, they used minimal action toward others. It is accounted for that they disengaged at first opportunity and did not attack, unlike their captors.

"The latter is a case of misunderstanding. Jaune was not attempting to trespass onto the marine ship. Rather, the vessel they were sailing in required a ladder for entry and exit. He had recently obtained devil fruit powers that allowed him to go through solid surfaces. Thus, when he attempted climbing the ladder, he fell through the side of his ship and through the side of the marine ship due to being unused to his powers. It should also be known that the log pose was not stolen, but rather was given freely by Lieutenant Monkey D. Luffy."

The judge's eyes were curious, but not suspicious. "Oh? And what evidence do you have to support these claims, hmm?"

"There is a filed report depicting the events in Beacon."

The judge began spinning his gavel around nonchalantly. The action vexed Weiss who thought he should be more professional. His response was lofty, "Do you have it here with you?"

Neptune reached for a large folder stationed on the prosecution's desk. "Yes sir, I —"

"Actually, it's 'ma'am'," the judge corrected. Neptune looked for a moment like he had been punched in the gut; however, he quickly brushed it off and collected himself.

"Sorry," he apologized. "Yes ma'am, I —"

"Hmm, no. Actually, it is 'sir'." Silence blanketed the room. Neptune went to recover, but the judge intervened. "Sorry, I'm just messing with you. Either is fine, but I get 'sir' more often."

Neptune nodded, "Well, I have the report right here, your honor."

The judge's eyes lit up as the paper was passed to him. "Well, it seems you figured that out. Alright, so this shows…" He slowly scanned the pages and flipped through them. Pyrrha did not like the frown that was slowly forming on his face.

The first matter seemed settled quickly, and not in team PWNY's favor. What came next was a surprise, but seemingly just to the defense. The boy that gave away the log pose, Monkey D. Luffy, was called as a witness to the stand. There was a quick discourse that involved Luffy calling them pirates only for it to be discussed that he specified 'cool pirates' as opposed to 'bad pirates.' Evidently, the second were actual pirates and the first were just people who liked to sail. After that finished, he swiftly and bluntly explained that he did in fact just hand them the log pose.

It seemed that Neptune had a surprising amount of evidence to support an argument that claimed all the accusations revolved around meaningless labels, inconclusive evidence, and abuse of power.

There was one moment that stood out from the rest. "Your honor, one of these claims is that a sword was stolen from a smaller island on the Grand Line. Now, looking at the report here, it can be summarized to say that their only evidence of a culprit is matching the description of an ambiguous faunus. The search then claimed Miss Blake Belladonna as the culprit without further evidence. Your honor, this is blatant racial profiling.."

Yang hissed under her breath, "Oh, she is not pulling that card, is she?" It only pissed her off how smug Blake looked. Like a cat who caught a canary.

The judge took a moment to look over the report before letting out a slight aghast noise. "This is so erroneous of them! They claimed that it was a zoan fruit, which would make the culprit one of a kind; however, there is already someone with the black cat devil fruit, and they are quite fameux." He said the last word in some strange, fancy accent like he was trying to show off. "The only way I could see them mistaking you for him would be if the marine needed glasses!"

The case carried on, as did Neptune, and Pyrrha almost thought she could feel the metaphorical rope tightening around her neck. She kept trying to build her argument, but being slandered like this was too distracting. Finally, they reached the latest incident, which evidently was the core of this all. Neptune cleared his throat and stood a little straighter. He even ran his hand through his hair to fix it, taking an exaggerated amount of time to do so.

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I'd like to begin this part by describing the visual situation. The tower at the time was only partially built, but it was enough that three stories of rooms were only visible to the outside through small windows. The workers outside were clearly minding their own business, doing nothing more than mundane construction. They also carried nothing that was visually similar to a known weapon. Among the various items within their hands, there were only tools. You may check the security footage of the ship to verify this, but I know this for a fact because I was part of the attacking party."

There was a sudden hushed murmur that swept over the room. Yang joined, "What's he doing?"

"Blundering," answered Weiss. "He must see the need to place himself in the events without lying, but he's painting the picture that a culprit is representing the victims — at least, from the jury's view."

The judge called for order and everyone settled down enough for Neptune to continue. "My friend, Sun, here and I were entrapped into signing an agreement to help the Marines." That turn was unexpected, and the murmuring silenced all together. "From the moment we were brought onto the Grand Line, hardly a single movement was our own…" He went over the events and circumstances that led to their situation, including feeling pressured between prison and a contract. The supposed blunder wasn't seen that way any longer.

"Thus, we were there with the marines, ready to fight not for what we believed in, but for what we were told to do. Then, before we reached the shore, Weiss Schnee was caught feeding the seagulls."

"How is that relevant?" Yang asked, turning to the other two with her. Weiss was stone faced, staring straight ahead while Pyrrha seemed equally confused.

Neptune held up a document and read, "As stated in the law here, it is illegal to feed the seagulls due to their delicate diet and the possibility it will affect the news coos."

"Objection!" Yang slammed her hands against the table. "There's no way that means anything! So what? She —"

"Miss Xiao Long!" The judge struck his gavel. "I gave you a warning, and it's clear you did not heed it. Please see yourself removed from my court."

Marines gathered to her sides, watching her carefully as she was escorted away. Pyrrha couldn't help but notice the stares pointed at Yang as she left. It was so sudden that she felt she couldn't properly react, but it also left a pit in her stomach. How would they be seen when one of their teammates was forced to leave like this?

She turned to Weiss, but the girl was still removing any trace of emotion left. Especially when footage was brought up showing her in the act. Projected onto a large screen to the judge's side was an image of Weiss talking to a few seagulls that had landed on the railing of their ship, and she was feeding them.

"Miss Schnee," the judge sighed. "Do you understand the severity of this? Not only could you have killed those poor, adorable creatures by feeding them the wrong thing, it could potentially interfere with the post. Civilians are often overlooked for this, but we hold our soldiers to a higher standard."

"It was worth it," Weiss muttered. The judge didn't catch it and tried to get her to repeat herself, but Weiss went silent once more.

Neptune went on to describe how they had attacked civilians. He provided that it was emotional distress upon himself and Sun who were forced to be there, and he also claimed that Nora hadn't attacked anyone. Some of the victims came up as witnesses. There was a large group that spoke of how they were injured, mentioning others that were still in the hospital. Others discussed how Nora had gently pushed them out of the way, only for someone else to harm them. The witnesses ended with one telling the judge what Yang had said to him.

Then, paperwork was brought out to show that Nora was the owner of that land. Supposedly, she had won it in an eating contest as she made a comment about how she only won since the chefs were able to make more pancakes. Franky then proved that he adamantly informed them they were trespassing. Neptune proved how it was impossible to see the Straw Hats from their ship, so as to say they had no reason to go on the property without a warrant. Then, the recordings came up.

"Did you see the cameras?" Pyrrha whispered to Weiss. She received only a shake of her head 'no' in response.

Each room was displayed, and so was each fight. One by one, they went through the list. First showed Nora reuniting with Ren. Pyrrha was unsure of how she felt about seeing Nora sitting and talking when the others had been fighting. She was sure though that she didn't agree with the others present who found it touching. She wasn't upset, but it hurt to know that she was hurting her best friend and Nora wasn't willing to do the same.

Most of the others followed a similar pattern. Although, she was surprised to see that Neptune and the pink and brown haired girl's, who she learned was named 'Neo,' fight was censored. It was evidently too graphic, but no other comment was made other than Neptune saying he held no resentment. Then came when Sun and Cardin had some sort of agreement, Sun spoke with Neptune, then the fights changed.

What Pyrrha was not expecting was when Neptune had the footage stopped just after Sun had joined Jaune in her fight. "Your honor, listen to these next words carefully."

All that could be heard was Pyrrha's own voice saying, "Typical…Of course your kind would stab us in the back." She paled. Sun had confronted her in the moment, and she rewatched it now, but that had to be tampered with. She had said 'pirate,' she was sure of it! Hearing it like this, there wasn't much she could do to speak against it.

She was so out of it, she didn't initially realize it was the defense's turn. Words eluded her, and only one argument came to mind. Evidently, calling them pirates did not sit well with those present.

Desperate to save the situation and prove anything she brought up a topic she had heard the marines report. "Ruby Rose has been seen to have some sort of emotion manipulating devil fruit! She has also used it maliciously."

"Objection, hearsay," Neptune called out.

Pyrrha went to argue, but the judge called out, "Sustained; however, this is a rather simple matter to investigate. Would someone bring a pair of sea prism handcuffs forward." One of the soldiers from the back disappeared for a moment before returning with a pair of mundane looking handcuffs. "To prove the effects of these, I shall demonstrate them myself."

The judge placed his palm to the side of his head and his face changed, suddenly matching an entirely different person. The cuffs were placed on one wrist and his appearance returned to his normal self, added with a sudden fatigue that washed over his features. They were then removed and brought over to Ruby. There was no reaction when they were used, at least from her. She whispered something and everyone watched as the marine's shoulders shuddered. Slowly, he removed the cuffs, then ran from the room crying.

"Is this the only argument you have, Miss Nikos?" The judge stared at her, but she had nothing left.

AN:

The wedding went well, but the coordinator was hell to deal with. I had to play for 45 minutes instead of 30 like I had prepared for, and they put me somewhere people were passing through so I had to keep stopping to let them cross. Evidently, the first time people thought everything was starting because of it.

So this was probably one of the most out there ideas my friend and I have had for this, so don't expect too much ending up like this, but I couldn't stop thinking about the scene in Monty Python and the Holy Grail where sir Lancelot gets arrested. It has opened up to some other jokes that come in the next chapter as well.

I also forgot to mention that last chapter I had written more fighting than I feel I ever have before, and any feedback for it would be appreciated. This is also past where I was when I first started posting this. I'm almost finished with chapter 17, but other than that, this will completely catch it up.

Anyways, next chapter: Federal Inquiry