Chapter 3: I Object….Bitches

Warning this is a two chapter update, also is unedited as we felt that uploading two chapters was a better idea then editing it.

….

Bella stood in her childhood home as she slowly got ready for her wedding Renee, Alice and Esme were helping her. She was currently climbing into her wedding dress and would soon be making her way down stairs to the limo that was waiting for her.

She could see Esme whispering to Alice while Renee zipped up her wedding dress. Suddenly Alice turned away while giving all the signs she was looking for something in the future.

'Good thing Alice is keeping an eye out for any trouble so that they can stop it before it happens' Bella thought as she twirled around in her dress.

…..

Upon reaching the beach carpark Harry looked around before turning to Sam and Paul.

"Do either of you have a car"

"Yeah, I could run home and grab it" Paul said before shifting and running off leaving Sam standing awkwardly next to Harry.

After a minutes of silence and staring at the ocean Sam turned to Harry

"How do you know the Cullen's" Sam asked with a voice of curiosity

Harry glanced at Sam,

"Well I was taking a lovely walk down this spooky road back in 1663 when I heard a loud scream and like a normally sane person I walked towards the sound"

Under his breath Sam muttered "That is not what a sane person would do"

Harry continued on as though he hadn't heard the comment "When I reached the source, I found a man just lying on the forest floor looking sad. A deer carcass next to him"

There was a fleeting look of fondness on his face as he reflected on this moment.

"I took pity on him and took him home with me. I helped Carlisle adjust to being a vampire and then he the ungrateful child-" with a fake devastated look and crocodile tears Harry trailed off

"Are you okay?" Sam looked at Harry as if he was deranged

"THAT BASTARD JOINED THE VOLTURI OF COURSE I'M NOT OKAY" Harry took a deep breath "THEY ARE A CULT AND THAT IDIOT GAVE THEM ALL HIS MONEY".

"I thought the volturi were the leaders of the vampire world" Sam stopped walking his face thoughtful

Harry turned to look at him walking backwards "that's just what they tell people but Aro told me over a couple of thousand wines that he discovered muggles had people who would lead the stupid and thought that sounds like a great idea"

"Anyway…THEN THEY HAD THE GAUL TO GIVE THEM MINE AND NOW HE HAS DONE IT AGAIN FOR A WEDDING THAT I"M NOT EVEN INVITED TOO"

Sam gave Harry a side wondering if he should just leave this strange man alone.

In a sympathy of sweet relief to Sam he could hear Paul's old pick up driving up the road, before the pit of dread resettled in his stomach as he realised he would be stuck in the cab of the truck for at least 20 minutes. Maybe I could drag Paul into a bet of getting there in under 15 minutes.

Upon reaching the parking lot Harry and Sam climbed into Paul's truck . Harry was in the middle seat squished between the two giants. Harry slowly moved his hand, a wooden stick appearing in his hand, reaching his hand out towards the dashboard he tapped the stick.

The inside of the car began to expand. At the sudden feeling Paul served and pulled off to the side of the road.

Harry continued to sing off key to the whole radio the entire way. Needless to say Paul and Sam really wanted to jump out.

About twenty minutes later, the shifters were completely done with the water coffin dude. As the truck came to a stop in front of the Cullen's definitely completely modest family house, Paul undid the seatbelt that the green eyes man was wearing and threw him out of the open window.

"Well that was rude"

Harry got up and brushed the dirt from his shirt. Though it still stained it slightly.

Sam and Paul stared at the man as he huffed and began to walk like Dumbledore when he pulled Harry's name out of the goblet of fire. The wizard rushed in yelling "I OBJECT"

The Lord marched down the aisle towards the Cullen's who had gone paler than their normal deathly pale. Which they did not know how that was physically possible- did they not eat their deer today?

Charlie stood from his front row chair and tried to block Harry from approaching the bride and groom.

"Move it" Harry said with a glare aimed over Charlie's shoulder "I have a bone to pick with the groom"

And with that the wizard pushed Charlie into the chairs. The father landed on top of plenty of people, including one Tanya Denali, who smirked at the man who was partially on her lap.