THEN
Yankee stadium was cloaked in purple and white in the late morning sun. The crowd that waited excitedly was not there for baseball. That afternoon was for the NYU class of 2012.
Anna Jane was practically bouncing in line as the "B" last names waited to file in. Down at the M's, Cole was considering making a break for it but knew Cecelia would ream him good. In the stands Ethan and Caroline were sandwiched with the Kellys, Phillip and Mary, and the surprising addition of Edward and Bella Cullen.
Cole had listened to Sylas's concerns the summer before, and by the fall once the four of them had settled into the new apartment in Brooklyn, he reached out to his cousin. He went with a letter, giving them both the space of time between responding. In it he explained that first and foremost, he knew Edward had his own family and Cole had as well. Blood didn't mean they had to force anything. However, there was a curiosity and he wondered if Edward had the same. He also made clear that he didn't expect Edward or any of the Cullens to help them. Cole knew that was Sylas's main intention, but they were all also big on choices, and Cole guessed Edward would feel the same after the Cullens last few years of turmoil.
The response came within the same week. Edward wrote that he had wanted to reach out when Carlisle had told him, however he wanted to focus on his wife and daughter first, and figured leaving the ball in Cole's court was for the best. By November he and Bella made the trip out to meet Cole and the other three.
Though Bella was only four years older than them when she had turned, the fact that she and Edward were parents to a now grown half vampire, it did make them feel more like an honorary Aunt and Uncle than cousins. And Bella glowed every time Cole's crooked smile winked out, matching Edwards.
As they got to know one another it became natural that Edward gave advice and asked Cole to tell him anytime they needed help. He'd agreed with Sylas that the Emissary may not have all their best interests in mind and he didn't want Cole falling into the same troubles that Edward himself had experienced with his family at the hands of the Volturi. Yet, they both agreed the rest of the Cullens and the pack of werewolves they considered family should continue finding their own peace after so many years of fighting.
Now that they were graduating Cole had plans to see Edward and Bella more often while he was in Forks for the summer before moving on and that he'd likely meet their daughter and her new husband Jacob. He had to admit he felt a click with Edward, and knew his father would have as well. His mother would have made friends with Bella and likely Esme. Knowing it, Cole made sure he put in the effort now that they'd started.
And knowing his parents would have been cheering louder than anyone in the stadium as the students walked in, he held himself a little higher.
As did Anna as she caught sight of Sylas rushing up the stadium steps to the seat Phillip reluctantly saved next to him.
Amongst all the joy, Caroline was in turmoil. The pride she felt for her best friends had her reconsidering her decision. It was moments like this one that she knew she'd always regret missing in the years to come. But the disconnect and dread was stronger than all the rest.
She caught Sylas glancing at her grimly a time or two, and avoided him. The distractions of the coming days would hopefully be enough.
After the ceremony, Anna rushed into Phillips arms eagerly while Cole wore a sheepish grin as John and Ethan tackled him. The group all spoke at once as they often had, moving in a unit towards the exit and their plans for celebrating. The dinner out was an indulgent one, where everyone felt as if they had no more worries than any of the other graduates and their families.
By the start of the next week the four of them were busy with packing and arrangements for their summer move back home. Cole was still waiting to hear back on some job opportunities and would land wherever the offer came. Anna Jane was in a similar position and was planning to work at the Grand while she continued saving up for her move in September. She decided on where she would land and had the hope that a job would follow soon so she could get there. And as for Ethan and Caroline, Caroline felt their last night in the city was as good of a time to reveal her own plan as any.
She evaded Ethan's distracted question on if she wanted to add her things to his boxes. Instead, Caroline had weeks ago sold most of her belongings to cover the purchase of an ancient but reliable enough car. Kept in the parking spot none of them had used in the year they had been in Brooklyn, little by little she loaded it with her art supplies and what was left of her clothes throughout the evening. As the others loaded boxes for shipping, she quietly packed her last suitcase.
After Anna was through mothering Cole until his eyes crossed, checking and rechecking he had everything ready, she turned to Caroline with her eager smile.
"Why don't you give me your ticket, I have the boys with my bag already."
"I don't have a ticket." Taking a breath, Caroline steeled her spine. "I'm not going back to Forks."
Cole and Anna immediately stiffened, while the words and their distant tone didn't quite reach Ethan.
Still taping up a box, Ethan paused. "Do you have an appointment with a gallery or shop I forgot?" He turned to Caroline, confused.
"I'm not going to Forks at all Ethan." She repeated.
Dropping the dispenser Ethan rose.
"What?" He managed.
"I can't….I don't want to do this anymore. I can't think around it, apart from feeling scared all the time. I don't even feel like a person anymore, or know who that person is without all of this."
"Caroline." Anna shook her head and took Caroline's hands. "We can talk this through. This isn't a rash decision to make."
"There's nothing rash about it. I've spent a year, more really, giving this thought. I've tried and tried to find another way but when it comes down to it what I need most is to be away from it all. I need to be like everyone else."
"We're not like everyone else. Leaving won't change what you can do."
Caroline did no more than look at Cole and stopped his words. It was as if a part of himself just tore away and he didn't even recognize the person looking back at him.
"You never said…..Ro?" Ethan's voice shook as he stepped towards her. "If you need time, if you need space from all this all you have to do is say. I'll go with you and we'll find a way through this together."
Seeing the resolve reach Caroline's eyes, Anna turned away and covered her mouth to quiet the small sob that escaped.
"Ethan…." Caroline started again.
"Don't." He reached for Caroline's face, holding her gaze to his. "Don't do this to us."
"Who even are we Ethan?" Raising her voice for the first time, Caroline pushed his hands away. "We've been together since we were barely more than kids. We don't know anything else; we've never been with anyone else."
"You want to take off so you can sleep around?"
Hearing the first licks of his temper Caroline glared back at Ethan. "That's not what I meant. We haven't experienced anything of regular life outside of one another. I want to know what my identity is and I don't know how else I can find it while I'm fighting someone else's war. I want to be something more than that and something more than just..."
"My girlfriend." Ethan finished.
"Is that even what I am? When is the last time we had a date Ethan? When is the last time we experienced anything new or normal? It's like we sewed up our lives at twenty. We aren't growing we're just stuck."
Watching the pain etch itself into Ethan's features Caroline started to feel her own, and with it, her strength began to fade.
"I love…I love all of you. This isn't easy for me to do, I only know I have to do it. I don't know anything past those two things anymore."
"The last six years aren't enough?"
Her chin shook first, feeling a cry or maybe even scream stuck in her throat. Trying to keep it trapped, Caroline only shook her head no.
Ethan's breath rushed out as though he had been punched.
Taking the moment to flee, Caroline grabbed up her suitcase and bag, freezing as Anna turned towards her.
"If you ever need help, if you ever need anything at all, you call me do you understand? This doesn't change that."
"Anna…I….."
"But you only call me." Still gentle, Anna rubbed Caroline's icy cheek and whispered. "If you ever change your mind or you ever want to speak with him, you call me first. Agreed?"
"Promise." Caroline breathed as her tears began to fall. "I have to…."
Anna pushed her for the door, her own eyes filling.
Ethan took a step to go after Caroline, but all the fight had left him, having his legs give out. As his knees hit the ground, Cole was right behind him, gripping the tops of his arms. Anna knelt with then and as Ethan's head fell on her shoulder, she wrapped her arms around them both.
At the time their lives felt like they were just beginning, yet also couldn't get any worse.
They were wrong.
NOW
Hayley shook her head and stood to pace.
"And we haven't seen her in…almost seven years. Strange to think it's almost been longer than we even had with her."
"I'm….." Hayley looked out the front window at the night and sighed. "Conflicted."
"Hard not to be. I loved her with everything I had and not because she was Ethan's girlfriend. So if she was truly in that much pain, of course a part of me was relieved she found the strength to want more for herself. But on the other side, I don't know that I could even look her in the eye if I crossed her on the street today. It destroyed a part of Ethan. The majority at first, but little pieces have come back over the years. But the whole shot, I don't know if it ever can. It doesn't seem to matter how many places he travels and how many new women he meets. He only takes it so far, he's never opened himself up to anyone else since."
With a crooked smile Cole shrugged. "Well, other than you, but I'm not worried."
Hayley rolled her eyes and started pacing again. "And you haven't even heard from her either Anna or you? Not even a text, email, letter, nothing?"
Cole shook his head. "Last we knew was she wrote an email to Cece and John thanking them for always accepting her into their home and lives and stepping in where her own parents fell short. She said she had no desire to reach out to her folks but if they were to get in contact with Cece to let them know that she was ok, she was going to find her own way. Something like that."
"I could forgive that. I can't imagine having something like this in your life since you were a teenager and it not making you have some obstacles later on. But to not check that you were all ok from time to time….I can't get behind that. That says nothing of her not doing so when Sylas died." Pausing Hayley turned.
"Cole you don't think she's….."
"No. I haven't looked for her either to confirm it or anything, and maybe we had moments of fear of for that before Sylas died. But after it clarified one thing. If one of them got her, they would absolutely make sure we knew."
"Just because she's young doesn't mean there aren't other, less sinister things that could have happened to her."
"I google it all the time." Cole said grimly. "I'm sure Ethan and Anna do as well. She's not online at all, but I figure no news is good news."
Reaching for her hand and tugging her back down to the couch, Cole braced himself.
"Listen. It's definitely not fair for me to say, but we all have our damages from this. One of mine is I need you to promise me that if everything gets to be too much, if you're scared or tired, or feel like we're not taking enough moments for us, I need you to tell me. I don't know how things may have been different for Ethan and Caroline is she spoke up to him more or he had listened better when she tried. But I do know that I can't lose anyone else. I'm not saying I'm going to tie you to a radiator."
Hayley's quick laugh and understanding eyes eased the tightness in Cole's chest. Looking down at their joined hands he added, "This means more to me than all the rest. So if there is something you need, please always tell me. And I'll always tell you."
"That's a promise I can make. There probably aren't many I can, seeing as so much is up in the air and changing so quickly. But I will always be honest and straightforward with you. This is too important not to be. They are, and we are."
Cole nodded, the truth of her words moving him more than any others had before. As Hayley tucked her head on his chest and his arms came around her, he felt such relief.
When Ethan and Anna returned, seeing Hayley walk right up to Ethan and hug him tightly, Cole's worries dimmed.
Then Anna took them back to the summer. That last summer in Forks that held what was left of the threes young adulthood before going their separate ways. Though even in it, she told Hayley how they couldn't claim they kept to average summer after graduation activities.
After all, rising up against a centuries old group was hardly a match for beach days and party nights.
***Just a note/reminder that my versions of the Cullens/pack come from my rewrite of the saga. You can still only read this story without having to read those four, however you may be a bit confused whenever the Cullens are featured so it wouldn't hurt to give them a read