Ziva was not sure what was wrong with them today but they did not seem to be in the mood for anything. All they had agreed on was they wanted to go to the beach. It was a nice day; they were off work and neither of them had plans. So, as they had now become accustomed to, they headed to a beach. Which should have been good, nearly all of their beach trips were good (not counting the ones involving bad weather, obviously), but it wasn't. Because they were bored and had no clue what they wanted to do.
"I am bored," Tony announced, huffing dramatically.
"Then find something to do," she replied irritably, mainly because she could not think of something herself.
If she could not think of something for herself then she definitely wasn't going to try and find something for him.
"I can't. That's why I'm bored."
And a bored Tony would quickly become an obnoxious Tony. She had plenty of experience with that.
"You aren't doing anything either," he said childishly when she didn't reply to him.
"I did not say that I was bored."
"But you are, aren't you?"
Again, she did not answer him making him smirk at her. Now she was going to have to find something to do just to prove him wrong. The problem was that she still could not think of anything. Seriously, there was nothing that she could think of doing. Which was silly because there was always something that could be done. Not today. And that was annoying. As was that smirk on Tony's face.
"You're bored," he crowed.
"Shut up."
"Not until you admit it."
She glared at him.
"Well, we have to find something to do."
She glared at him. "I could do something to you. That would keep you occupied."
He actually took a step back and gulped.
"No, I'm good. I'll think of something."
She smirked and nodded, returning to her own thoughts. Of course, she wouldn't actually do anything to him. Not here. Too many potential witnesses but she was not about to inform him of that.
"I bet I can find more shells than you," Tony challenged childishly.
Ziva scoffed and rolled her eyes. How did he even come up with these things?
"That is hardly a competition."
"It is so!" He said indignantly.
"There are so many shells here," she said, gesturing at the beach around them. "There would be no challenge. It would simply be a matter of speed."
Which she was obviously superior at. It really would not be a competition.
"What about the most whole shells then," Tony suggested, looking hopeful and the chance of a bit of competition. "That's got to be harder, right?"
Ziva thought about a moment before nodding. "I suppose. But we are not children, we do not need to be taking bucket loads of shells home with us."
"Who said anything about taking them home with us? But I see your point. Adults walking around like mad people with a bucket of shells does look a bit odd. And would be unfair to the kids."
She just rolled her eyes at him.
"What about the best one then?" He suggested.
"Best one?"
"Yeah," he said, starting to get excited. "Let's try and find the best shell! That's all we'll need. One shell. That way we're not carting around a whole load of them."
Why he was so exciting about such a thing she wasn't sure but she supposed it was better than his constant complaining of being bored.
She crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow. "And who exactly will be determining which one is the best?"
It was not like either of them were going to admit if the other one had a better shell. They were too competitive for that.
"We'll deal with that later, let's go and look for some shells."
"I'm telling you that mine is better. See these swirls?"
They were pretty amazing swirls of he said so himself. Which he did. Which is why his was the superior shell. It was just obvious.
"It is not," she denied vehemently and produced her own. "Mine is obviously better."
"As if," he scoffed. "Yours is boring by comparison."
"It is an interesting shape!"
"It's a broken shape!"
"It is not!"
Tony rolled his eyes and grabbed her shell off her and turned it over in his hands.
"I don't think a whole shell supposed to have a razor-sharp edge, " he said, running his finger down aforementioned sharp edge.
Which, in hindsight, was a stupid thing to do. He winced as he accidentally sliced his finger and beads of blood appeared. It stung from the salt on his hands.
"This one does."
"Because it's broken."
"No, it is supposed to be like this."
"I'm pretty sure it's not but trust you to find the shell that's most like a knife on this beach."
She looked so smug when he said that that he was actually a bit worried.
"That is what makes it the perfect shell."
"The perfect shell can't be broken he scoffed.
"It is not broken!"
"It is!"
"It is not!"
"Okay, obviously we Can't decide who has the best one. We're biased," Tony finally said in exasperation after far too much back and forth.
"We are going to have to decide."
"No, we're going to have to get someone else to."
Ziva gave him a look. "We are the only people here, how are we going to get someone else to decide for us?"
"Technically, we're not alone. We're on a beach full of people..."
"I am not asking a stranger to rate our shells. Do you know how ridiculous that sounds?"
Okay, that was true. Definitely not one of his better ideas.
"Why don't we call someone? Lile Abby."
"Do you really want to get Abby involved in this?" Ziva asked sceptically.
Hmm, maybe not. Abby would be into it but maybe too into it.
"And Involving McGee is the same thing as involving Abby and you know it," Ziva added before he could say anything else.
"This shouldn't be this hard," he huffed.
"It is not because I have the better shell."
"You don't!"