Seated within Skyhold's inn, Marian's fortitude mirrored the fortress that enveloped her. With raven-black hair meticulously tied in the back, long bangs adorned both sides of her face, concealing the tumult that resided behind her piercing gaze. To the casual observer, she appeared a quick-witted, sarcastic rogue. Yet beneath the veneer of humor lay a reservoir of pain. Her inner demons, more formidable than the foes she faced with daggers, haunted the hidden recesses of her being.
As Marian sat with her thoughts, a soft, almost ethereal presence approached her. Cole, the enigmatic spirit, materialized beside her, his wispy form adorned in tattered, faded clothing. Atop his head, a large, peculiar hat added an eccentric touch, and his long, blonde hair flowed freely beneath it. His eyes, reflecting a mixture of innocence and profound understanding, held a spectral glow. Marian couldn't help but be intrigued by this spirit who, despite his childlike demeanor, held wisdom that transcended centuries. His perceptive gaze met hers, and she sensed that in this ethereal being, she might find an unexpected source of solace.
Marian smiled warmly and looked at him with nurturing eyes, "Hello there. You must be Cole, right? I've heard a bit about you."
Cole nodded, "Yes, I am. You're Hawke. Marian Hawke. The Champion of Kirkwall."
"Oh I don't need to be anyone's champion anymore, Just plain old Marian or Hawke will do," she told him playfully, " And you're welcome here, Cole. If you ever need someone to talk to or if there's anything you need, don't hesitate to ask."
Gratitude flickered in Cole's gaze, "Thank you, Hawke. It's… different here."
Marian chuckled softly, "Well, Adaar did gather a rather unusual group. Wouldn't expect anything less from a tal-vashoth mercenary leading an Inquisition."
A hint of a smile crossed Cole's face, and he nodded appreciatively. "They help. You help. I want to help too."
Marian gave him an encouraging pat on the back . "And you are, Cole. In your own unique way."
Marian now drifted off into her thoughts. Her eyes glued to the fireplace, hoping they could burn away her trauma.
"He wanted to change the world, to stop the hurting. You were trying to stop hurting, too. But he lost himself. You didn't want this, didn't choose it. The pain clings to you, but it's not your fault," Cole's voice snapped her out of her trance and back into the present .
Her eyes widened in surprise at his words "Wait, you aren't talking about Anders are you?" Marian was intrigued, not frightened or uncomfortable , " you knew what I was thinking about?"
"You helped him because he hurt, too. You wanted to protect those you cared about. The pain wasn't your fault. You didn't know what would happen."
"True, I didn't. But it's still hard not to feel responsible for the chaos that followed. So many lives were lost."
"Don't blame yourself," Cole continued , "you didn't know. You just wanted to protect your sister because she was a mage. You didn't want to harm innocents like Anders. You're not responsible."
"Adaar told me about your ability to get inside people's heads," Hawke remembered, "but to experience it myself is something else. How does it work exactly?"
"It's hard to explain, I feel what others feel," Cole explained. "Usually, I make people forget, but not you. You're open, receptive to spirits."
Marian laughed, "Well I'm quite unusual myself, so I like the unusual. I had quite a merry band of misfits I hung around in Kirkwall. Sometimes, I miss those days."
Marian's mind wandered again. She knew Cole would know what she was thinking about, but it didn't bother her. She often kept things in, but it felt good to talk it out for a change.
"So much hurt... a mother taken, a wound that never fully heals. You wish you had reached her sooner, spared her from the pain."
Hawke's eyes clouded with grief as she nodded in acknowledgment, the memory of her mother's tragic fate resurfacing.
"I always blamed myself for not getting there in time," she said softly, "for not saving her. It's a burden that never truly lifts."
"You tried. The wanting to help, to save, it's what makes you caring. But sometimes, the darkness wins."
"You're right, Cole. I tried my best, but sometimes, it's not enough."
Marian continued to stare into the dancing flames, seeking solace in their chaotic warmth. As her thoughts lingered on the burdens she carried, she waited for Cole to speak again.
"You wish you could forget," he remarked, his voice soft and understanding.
"Yes," Marian said emphatically, " I wish I could. Can you help me forget? I want to erase these painful memories."
"No," Cole gently protested, "you shouldn't forget. It makes you kind. You remember the hurt, so you don't want others to hurt."
She contemplated his words, a glimmer of gratitude in her eyes. Yet, when she turned to respond, she found Cole had vanished. A brief moment of confusion passed, and she sighed.
"Well there he goes," she chuckled, suppressing the strange feeling that lingered.
Deciding to focus on the present, she shrugged off the unusual encounter. "Guess I'll have another pint. Maybe Varric will join me."
Suddenly, Marian felt an unexpected wave of emotion wash over her. In that crowded space at the Skyhold inn, a stranger's silhouette momentarily mirrored the image of her late mother, Leandra. The uncanny resemblance brought forth a wellspring of memories, and Marian instinctively reached for a delicate locket around her neck – a cherished memento from Leandra.
With a tender touch, she unclasped the locket, revealing a miniature portrait of her mother smiling warmly. A single tear traced its way down Marian's cheek as she whispered a silent conversation with the precious keepsake. In that vulnerable moment, the weight of loss and longing rested on her shoulders. Swiftly composing herself, Marian carefully secured the locket, hiding the intimate exchange from prying eyes.
Determined to shake off the emotional turmoil, she took a steadying breath and resolved to find solace in the camaraderie of familiar faces. Tucking the locket beneath her clothing, Marian ventured back into the bustling inn, seeking the company of companions who had become her chosen family.