And now, it's time for the real adventure to begin. Deadpool's day is about to be turned upside down when he notices some strange signs. And he knows more than anybody that these signs can only mean one thing.
They mean it's time for a crazy, insane adventure with the Doctor. And there's no way Deadpool will ever say no to that.
Enjoy!
000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000
"So how's Graham and the others?" Deadpool asked, as he and a blonde woman wearing a long coat, rainbow shirt, and suspenders crept around the hallway. "Any updates on the 'fam'?"
The woman laughed. "I was hoping you'd call them that too. Not that 'Team TARDIS' isn't a fun name too. But calling them my 'fam'? Just can't help myself. Guess it's just part of being me. Well, this version of me. Oh, please don't tell my past selves I do that. I don't want them to steal my idea."
Deadpool laughed. "Relax, Doctor. Out of all your faces, I think you're the only one allowed to call your group of companions the 'fam'."
"And don't you forget it. Now, where's that room?"
Deadpool and the Thirteenth Doctor were currently sneaking around a cereal factory, searching for the room where they stocked the little toy prizes currently found in their boxes. Eventually, they found a room that said "Prize Room". The Doctor quickly unlocked it with her sonic screwdriver, and Deadpool rushed in while the Doctor kept watch. Deadpool began digging through boxes with the same energy as a kid on Christmas. If that kid at Christmas was wearing a red suit, matching mask, an assortment of weapons, and a crazed look in his eyes.
"Only you would rather sneak into a cereal factory rather than just buying a bunch of boxes," the Doctor said, laughing.
"Do I look like I'm made of money?" Deadpool asked, having found two of the five toys in the current set already. "Nah, this is way easier."
"I can see why you asked for my help though."
"Trust me. The only other Doctor I've hung out with so far that would've agreed is Eleven. And he's apparently busy with something, so here we are. Maybe I should bribe him next time. I DO have a few fezes in my closet."
The Doctor laughed. "You're not wrong. Pretty sure the me from last time would've just given you some scary glare and said something along the lines of (insert overexaggerated Scottish accent here) 'What's wrong with the joys of just opening the box to find the prize? You need to find a hobby.'."
"No arguments there. Also, have you realized you and the others get so much mileage from making fun of yourselves?"
"Yep. Never gets old."
Deadpool returned to his searching. "Still, Twelve's not too bad a guy. He did help me out with my first date with Valentine."
"Oh, I remember that. I know I was annoyed by the favor, but I was glad I could help back then. Just as I am now."
"Because what we're doing now involves a lot of comedic hijinx?"
"Definitely."
Deadpool stood up, examining the pile of plastic and discarded toys before him. "Alright, I found them all."
"Brilliant."
Just then, they saw a security guard turning the corner. "Hey! Stop right there!"
"And…mark," Deadpool said, smiling. "Run!"
The duo ran down the hallway as fast as they could, away from the security guard. Thankfully, they managed to get out of the factory before the guard could call in reinforcements. Deadpool and the Doctor didn't stop running until they were outside the factory's perimeters, where they both sat against the wall and laughed.
"Definitely more low-key compared to what I usually do, but so much fun!" the Doctor said, giggling as she ran her fingers through her hair. "You never cease to amaze me, Deadpool."
"Thanks. I do try. And now I have all the Sugar Crunchies' prizes to show for it."
The two walked back to the Doctor's TARDIS, parked a few hundred yards away. "You sure you don't need me to drop you off?" the Doctor asked.
"Nah, my home's not too far from here. Besides, knowing the TARDIS, you'll try and take me to my apartment, and we'll instead end up somewhere in Canada. Not that I would complain. What country do you think produced this fine specimen of mojo?"
The Doctor laughed. "Forgot you were Canadian."
"Proud of it. See you around, Doc. And thanks for the help. Say hi to the 'fam' for me."
With a final wave between the two, Deadpool walked off at the TARDIS dematerialized. As he walked, a strange smile spread across his face. He still couldn't believe that he had somehow become friends with the Doctor.
It had been one month in Deadpool's time since he met the Tenth Doctor and Rose Tyler, and the three were inadvertently taken to the planet of Astaria, where they were recruited to save the planet from a nefarious plot. While they couldn't save the planet, they were able to save its people, who all found a new planet to resettle and call home. At the beginning of the adventure, the Doctor had regarded Deadpool as mainly an annoyance. But their shared skills in banter, combined with them both saving each other's lives, allowed trust to slowly grow between the two. By the end of their adventure, a strong friendship had emerged, one that Deadpool was happy to know would endure well into the Doctor's future. And he wasn't kidding. Thirteen was over twice as old as Ten.
He pulled out his notebook out of his pocket/Magic Satchel and opened it to a certain photo. It was of himself, the Doctor, Rose, Julie, Leo, Yusei, Lammy, and Snake Eyes the night they all dined together at that Mexican restaurant in New York City. The Doctor had managed to arrange a meeting between Deadpool and all of the currently-known incarnations, where they all signed the same book. Deadpool had placed the photo on the opposite page from the signatures.
Another item he pulled out of his pocket was a small necklace, the charm in the shape of a bird's wing, with a small jewel in the center. He carried this wherever he went in memory of Lyrsa, the princess he befriended on Astaria and the one who gave him the necklace, and one of the bravest people Deadpool had ever known. The necklace served as a reminder to keep going, and never give up.
He put the items away and kept walking down the street. However, as he passed a McDonald's sign, he noticed the letters distorting a little bit. Just for a brief moment, the sign went from saying the name of the restaurant to two simple words.
Help me.
Blinking his eyes, he looked at the sign again. It looked like just any other McDonald's sign.
"Okay, that was weird."
"ROOOOAAAARRRRGGGHHHHH!"
The sudden roar made Deadpool sink to his knees, covering his ears and screaming. As confused passers-by walked past, a sudden vision flashed before Deadpool's eyes. It only lasted for a second, but he could make out a large dragon of gold and silver.
The roar and vision ended as quickly as they started, and Deadpool stood up. He looked around, trying to figure out where it all came from. Unfortunately, he could see nothing out of the ordinary.
"Some kind of cosmic prank?" Deadpool asked. "Yeah, I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm not laughing. Did Doctor Strange suddenly get a sense of humor?"
Bewildered, Deadpool still realized he needed to be anywhere but there. So he ran down the street and out of sight.
(Meanwhile…)
A red Duel Runner pulled up and parked outside the steakhouse. Its driver took off his helmet, letting his spiky hair spring back up. Lammy, perched on the back of the bike, took off her own helmet, and the two hopped off.
"Finally, my kind of joint," Lammy said, looking at the building. It was a place called "Rock n' Roll Pizza", which served as both a restaurant and venue, where rock bands could book gigs and perform.
"Yeah, Murdoc told me about this place," Yusei said, his arm around Lammy's shoulders. "He said we could use it as a date spot, but also find out if MilkCan might want to perform here too."
Lammy smiled. "Two birds with one stone. I like it." The dragon and the song were still on her mind, but she wasn't about to let her dream ruin her night.
Yusei stepped to the door and opened it for Lammy. "After you, milady."
"You're too kind, good sir knight."
After being led to their table and ordering their drinks, Lammy took a moment to ask the waiter about how to book a show at the restaurant.
"I was just wondering, because I'm in a band myself. We're called MilkCan, and I'm the lead guitarist. I actually brought my guitar with me. Yeah, I don't have a reservation for the stage tonight, I know. I just take my guitar wherever I go. I just wanted to ask what I have to do to book a gig here."
Yusei listened as the waiter answered Lammy's questions and promised to hand her the paperwork for an initial show. As the waiter turned away, however, that's when Yusei heard it.
"ROOOOAAAARRRRGGGHHHHH!"
He covered his ears, trying to block out the sound, as the short vision of the dragon graced his eyes.
"Yusei, are you okay?"
Yusei looked back up to see Lammy looking at him across the table.
"Did you hear that?"
"Hear what?"
"That roar just now."
Lammy shook her head, but her mind suddenly went into overdrive. 'He didn't…'
"Lammy, is something wrong? You said you had another dream about Namora, right?"
The lamb nodded. "You know how they are. I don't think they're something that will ever truly go away."
"Trust me, Lammy. I know the feeling."
(SPOILER ALERT!)
Yusei tended to have his own fair share of nightmares, mainly connected to the catastrophic event when he was a baby, when New Domino City's original Ener-D Reactor went into meltdown, killing thousands and splitting the city, and more or less shaping Yusei's entire life up to that point. Even though he wasn't old enough to remember, he knew exactly what happened. And that very knowledge tended to pop up and haunt him at night just as much as Namora did to Lammy.
"Funny thing, this one was different," Lammy said, pulling out her sheet music. "Near the end, I came across this dragon. It was singing. I managed to remember the song, and I have it down here."
Yusei's eyes widened. "Wait, dragon? Was it gold?"
"Yeah. Why?"
As Yusei explained, the waiter from earlier brought their drinks and took their orders. The two explained their shared visions with the dragon, though neither of them understood why only Lammy got to hear the song.
Before long, their food arrived. Just as they began to eat, the doors opened, and Deadpool walked in. Before being taken to his table, he spotted his friends having a laugh, and being Deadpool, he couldn't resist the urge to walk over and say hi.
"Did I just stumble on date night?" he asked, much to Yusei and Lammy's astonishment at his appearance. "I think I did."
Lammy facepalmed. "Of course."
"Deadpool, what are you doing here?" Yusei asked skeptically. "Was this on purpose?"
"Heck no. Why would you believe this was on purpose?"
"Because of the time you crashed Ruby and Sonic's date," Yusei replied.
"And Sam and Snake's," Lammy added.
"Daxter and Tess's date as well," Yusei continued.
"And didn't Gaz punch you in the face for crashing her and Double D's date three times in one day?" Lammy finished.
Deadpool nodded. "She has quite the punch for a kid. But seriously, this was completely an accident, I swear. I just have a lot on my mind right now, and I wanted a place to relax."
Lammy shrugged. "Whatever. Just keep to your table please. Yusei and I ARE still on a date."
"Aww, no fun conversation?"
"Deadpool?" Yusei asked, almost pleading.
"Ugh. Fine."
Deadpool stalked back to his table, letting Yusei and Lammy talk more. He looked at his menu. 'Ugh, no chimichangas? Oh yeah, this is a steakhouse. Darn. Oh hey, they have a challenge here. Eat this entire steak in an hour and the entire table's meals are free? Nice. Maybe I should try that.'
Just then, the words on the menu distorted again. The words 'help me' flashed again, lasting for several seconds. Deadpool gasped. This was no longer a coincidence. He flipped around the menu, trying to see if it would happen again. Sure enough, the same words flashed on another page.
Suddenly, every word on the menu morphed into those same two words and stayed that way. Deadpool blinked, but this time, it remained. And on the back, a third word materialized.
Doctor.
Panicked but excited, he took the menu and crawled over to where Yusei and Lammy sat.
As he crawled under their table, he listened as the two talked about how the place was looking better and better as a regular gig spot from MilkCan. Despite not wanting to ruin their date, Deadpool felt he needed to show somebody this. Tentatively, he knocked on the back of the table.
"Guys?"
However, he came to quickly regret this as two pairs of arms roughly dragged him from under the table and to the hallway where the bathrooms were.
"Are you insane?" Yusei asked with exasperation.
"Uh, have you met me?"
Lammy facepalmed again. "All we asked was for you to keep your distance while we enjoyed our date. Was that too much to ask, or were we just not clear enough?"
"But guys-"
"But what?" Yusei asked, getting angrier.
In response, Deadpool shoved the altered menu into Yusei's face. The duelist grabbed it and scanned it, his eyes widening as he quickly began to grasp the situation.
"Did they give you a menu with a bunch of typos?" Lammy asked, leaning over to look at the menu.
"No, I promise this thing changed before my very eyes. I think it's the Doctor. He's sending me a message, or a distress signal or something. I have to find where they're sending this from."
Yusei sighed. "And please explain to me why you need to tell all of this to Lammy and I instead of just going off on your own. Pretty sure we don't need to get involved in this."
"Sheesh, what's gotten into you two?" Deadpool asked.
"One word, Deadpool," Lammy said before she and Yusei both shouted in unison, "DATE!"
"Yeah, whatever. I just wanted to let you guys know. I think this thing's gonna lead me to another adventure, which is awesome because I just got done sneaking into a cereal factory with Thirteen for their box prizes. I got them, we ran out of there, she said TTFN and headed off, I suddenly got blasted with a vision of a dragon and its roar, needed a place to clear my head, and the next thing I know, I'm ruining your da-"
"WAIT!" Lammy exclaimed. "What's this about a dragon?"
"Why is that important?"
"Was the dragon gold and silver?" Yusei asked.
"Yeah. Why?"
Deadpool watched as his friend's expressions went from anger, to confusion, to utter bewilderment. It suddenly clicked that the two of them knew something about what he was talking about.
"Guys? You good?" he asked, waving his hand over the faces of his dazed friends. Suddenly, he spotted movement out of the corner of his eye. It appeared to be next to a trash can. Then his ears registered a familiar hum coming from outside the restaurant. He looked back at the trash can. Strangely, it seemed a bit more metallic than a normal one.
Wait a minute…
"Guys, we need to go now," Deadpool warned.
"Wait, what?" Yusei asked, before Deadpool began dragging them to the door just as a laser blast barely missed them. As he passed Yusei and Lammy's waiter, he stopped and pulled out his wallet.
"Hi, these guys had a great time," Deadpool said quickly. "I heard something earlier about this place being a good gig spot for Lammy's band. I think she'll call you once they've made the arrangements." He pulled out the money needed for Yusei and Lammy's table, using only one hand and the table since the other one was preventing Yusei and Lammy from escaping. "Here you go, don't wanna get my friends on dish duty over this."
He pulled something else out of his wallet and handed it to the waiter. And here's my table. Goodnight!"
As he continued dragginging his friends out, the water called back, "Sir, this is a coupon card!"
"All I got was a drink anyway!" Deadpool yelled back as he hurried his friends out of the restaurant. As they ran out, Deadpool looked around and spotted a swirling portal at the end of the parking lot.
"Yes! I knew it!" And he began dragging Yusei and Lammy towards the box.
"Deadpool, this is YOUR adventure," Lammy tried to explain. "Not ours. How are we involved?"
"That thing was after you guys. And we all saw the same dragon. Trust me, you guys are involved."
"At least let me go so I can retrieve my runner!" Yusei exclaimed, knowing they weren't gonna change Deadpool's mind.
Sighing, Deadpool let go of Yusei and watched as he wheeled the runner towards the portal. The three ran inside and stepped out on the other side, where they toppled onto a grassy hill.
It took a moment for Yusei and Lammy to calm down. "What the heck was that just now?" Lammy asked.
Deadpool laughed. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say we were attacked just now by a Dalek."
"Seriously?" Yusei asked. "The Doctor's sworn enemies?"
"The very same."
"I'm guessing we're already wherever the Doctor is," Deadpool explained, heading to the door. "The Daleks likely left that portal behind. Didn't think we would find it.."
"Hey, do you even know which incarnation is out here?" Lammy asked.
Deadpool looked around. "No clue. Likely, it's one I'm associated with. But I hope it's Ten"
"He's the one you were with on Astaria, right?" Yusei asked.
"Yep."
Yusei and Lammy looked at each other and nodded. "Well, I guess we're involved now," Yusei said. "So what's the plan?"
"Easy. First, we find out where we are. We could be anywhere in time and space. Kyoto, Mars, Chris' meditation room. Well, we're outside, so we can rule that one out. Thank God. Then, we find the Doctor. He can tell us what's going on, and we'll help him solve it like good little companions. And if the Daleks are involved, he's gonna need all the help he can get. Oh, my God. I get to go toe-to-toe with the freaking Daleks! Now we're talking."
The three carefully looked over the top of the hill, revealing a sprawling city with skyscrapers and other notable landmarks in the distance. To their back was a vast ocean.
"Okay, this doesn't tell us much," Deadpool said.
"Does that?" Lammy asked, pointing in the distance. Far away, situated on the side of a hill, was the Hollywood sign. They were in Los Angeles.
"Okay, that settles the 'where'," Yusei said. "Let's see if we can find the 'when'."
"Yeah, I'm not getting much present-day vibes from this place," Deadpool added.
Deadpool agreed to search on foot, while Yusei and Lammy took the Duel Runner, and the three searched the city. It wasn't long before they found out when they were, as Deadpool dug up a newspaper somebody had just thrown away.
"Check this out, guys," he said when he flagged the passing runner. "June 18th, 1985."
"I was wondering why people were giving my runner some weird looks," Yusei admitted.
"Okay, so there's that part down," Lammy said. "Now all we have to do is find the Doctor. We'll ask people if they've seen a guy in a trench coat and a sonic screwdriver."
Deadpool laughed. "I bet that sounded better in your head."
"Yeah, it did."
The three continued to explore the streets of L.A., asking whoever they could if they had seen the Doctor.
"Have you seen a guy about yay high?" Deadpool asked one random pedestrian. "Brown hair, suit, trench coat?"
The pedestrian shook his head.
"Shoot. Thanks, anyway."
The search continued in this manner for the three for a few hours. Everyone they asked didn't seem to have any kind of clue who they were talking about. At one point, Deadpool took a risk by asking if someone had specifically seen the Doctor. The guy had looked at him weirdly and asked if he was talking about a hospital doctor, or that blond cricket-loving weirdo on British television (Deadpool secretly laughed at that last bit). Yusei and Lammy weren't having much luck either, as everyone just seemed to want to point them to the nearest hospital.
Eventually, the three met up again by the same hill where they first appeared, all exhausted from their efforts.
"1980's, present day, who cares?" Lammy asked. "This city is huge. We're never gonna find the Doctor like this."
"Maybe we need to think of this differently," Yusei pointed out. "Why do you think he sent the distress signal?"
Deadpool gave a small grin through his mask. "I don't think he would've unless he really needed the help."
"Like if he was in danger from something."
"Exactly."
The three sat together on the bench. "Hey, what do you know about the Daleks?" Lammy asked.
Deadpool grinned. "I was hoping you were gonna ask. Gather around, you two. I am about to weave you a little tale about the Daleks and their home planet, Skaro."
(SPOILER ALERT!)
He stood up, pulling down a diagram out of nowhere, and began explaining in his most dramatic voice. "You see, this monstrous species was first introduced in the second serial of the very first Doctor Who series, right after "An Unearthly Child". And they've been striking fear ever since. These things come from the planet of Skaro, created by the mad scientist Davros in an attempt to end Skaro's ongoing war. But his plan worked too well, as the Daleks ended up decimating both sides of the war. They have been ravaging the universe ever since, and have frequently clashed with the Time Lords of Gallifrey. Particularly, the Doctor is considered Public Enemy #1 to the Dalek species.
"Yes, they look like trash cans. Well, their armor does. A Dalek can't survive long outside of this thick travel casing. They're basically like Darth Vader, except at least Vader has limbs. And you saw those weapon arms on them. Trust me, the last thing you want to do is cross a Dalek. These things have clashed with the Doctor probably thousands of times, and have come close many times to exterminating all life. Yeah, exterminating stuff is something they're very fond of. In their eyes, the Daleks must reign supreme over everything. And it was that very fury that had led to the Doctor losing everything he cared about on more than one occasion."
Lammy shivered. "Those things? No kidding."
"But then why were they after us?" Yusei asked.
As they pondered this, the roar from earlier suddenly rang through their ears, as did the visions of the dragon. They clutched their heads, waiting for it to pass.
Once it was over, they all looked up at each other. "Same dragon?" Deadpool asked.
The other two nodded.
"Hey, Lammy, did you hear any of that song again?" Yusei asked.
"I think so, yeah."
"Song?" Deadpool asked.
Lammy pulled the sheet music out of her pocket. "I didn't see the dragon the same way you guys did. She came to me in a dream, singing this song. I remembered the song and jotted it down here. I am so glad my skills as a musician came in handy. For some reason, I felt I needed to remember the song."
Deadpool looked at the sheet music. "Wow, this is actually really good. You said the dragon was singing this?"
"Yeah."
The mercenary patted Lammy on the back as he handed her the song. "Not bad, Lammy. Keep that safe, we'll probably need it down the road."
Just then, the roar came back, echoing through all of their heads.
"Wait, it felt different this time," Yusei said. "Anybody else?"
The others nodded.
"Yeah," Lammy said. "I think it's calling us."
"Where?" Deadpool asked. "To wherever it is?"
Lammy shook her head. "No, I think it wants us to go somewhere else." She sat and pondered for a moment. Then…
"The beach!"
Without waiting for a response, Lammy stood up and ran down the hill to the beach, the guys following her.
Soon, the three were all standing on the sandy shores. Yusei and Lammy were breathing heavily. "You guys really need to do some cardio," Deadpool said, hardly winded.
"Sorry we're not superhuman like you," Yusei retorted.
"This from the guy with a magic tattoo on his arm."
Lammy shook her head and surveyed the beach. Suddenly, she spotted something washing up onto the shore. Leaving the guys behind for a moment, she ran to the spot where she saw it, retrieving it before the tide could claim it again.
She gasped as she beheld the strange object in her hands, a small white orb, about the size of a billiard ball. It glowed softly in her hands.
"Woah."
Quickly, she ran back to her friends, carrying the orb closely. "Any idea what this is?" she asked as she handed it to Yusei to examine.
Yusei looked at it closely. "No clue."
Deadpool looked at it. "Eyeball? Weird-looking lightbulb? I mean, this is the 1980's. Speaking of which, have you guys been doing a count of how many times you've heard 'tubular' since you got here? I'm already up to thirty-eight."
"Deadpool, focus," Yusei said.
"Right. Could this be what the dragon thing was calling us to?"
"Probably," Lammy said. "But what this thing has to do with it, I have no clue."
The three ran to a rocky outcrop connected to the shore and climbed up, hoping for some clue as to where the orb might have come from. Unfortunately, they didn't spot anything obvious. They looked around at the water below them.
"This whole situation is getting way too complicated," Deadpool complained. The other two nodded and muttered their assent as they sat down on the rocks, looking out into the ocean.
"Sheesh, why didn't we pick a place like this as a date spot?" Lammy asked Yusei.
"Hey!"
Deadpool laughed. "We're several decades in the past, and you choose this as a date spot?"
"We wouldn't have to if someone hadn't plucked us from the restaurant," Lammy reminded him.
"Hey, I was saving your butts from a Dalek! Technically, the Dalek ruined your date, not me."
"Yeah, I think I would rather just blame you," Yusei pointed out. "It could've very easily just been after you, you're the Doctor's friend."
"Considering we're all getting visions of that dragon thing and it gave Lammy an actual song, I doubt it."
"And what does this dragon possibly have to do with the Daleks?" Lammy asked.
Deadpool shrugged. "You tell me, I'm not the hyper-intelligent alien guy who travels around in a box."
"Definitely hyper, I'll give you that," Yusei said, turning his head to look at a rock jutting out of the water.
Now, having been in as many weird situations as these three, you would expect all of them to have keen observation skills. And you would be right. As Yusei looked at the rock, he noticed something off about the way the waves crashed onto it.
"Do you guys see that?" Yusei asked, pointing at the rock. "I think there's something over there."
Deadpool stood up and pulled out a set of binoculars (fittingly with the Deadpool logo on them), looking through them towards the rock. Yep, those waves are definitely not crashing onto that rock the way they should. Unfortunately, Deadpool couldn't see very well what was obstructing them. All he could make out was something brown, flapping in the water.
"That's it?" Deadpool muttered, looking closely. Whatever the brown thing was, it was likely attached to something besides the rock, or it would've lost its grip.
"It could be absolutely anything," Deadpool told the others. "The brown thing could just be a grocery bag. Or a sheet of paper. Maybe clothes. A pair of pants, maybe a shirt, some kind of coat…"
He paused.
"Deadpool?" Lammy asked.
"Coat…brown coat…brown trench coat…"
Right then and there, it clicked.
"NO WAY!"
Hurriedly, Deadpool reached into his utility belt and pulled out a neatly folded, large inflatable unicorn pool bed. Pressing a button, the unicorn instantly inflated and settled on the waves. Deadpool then jumped off the rocks and into the water, clinging onto the unicorn.
Yusei and Lammy, having realized the connection for themselves, shouted that they were coming too. After placing Lammy's guitar and Yusei's duel disk safely on the rocks to prevent water damage, they jumped into the water. The three of them paddled the unicorn to the rock in question.
They reached the rock, where Deadpool's suspicions were confirmed. There, unconscious and clinging onto the rock as the waves crashed over him, was the Tenth Doctor.
While Deadpool hung back to keep the unicorn steady, Yusei and Lammy grabbed the Doctor, pulled him to the top of the rock, and gently placed him on the unicorn. They jumped back into the water, and the three paddled back to shore, with the unicorn and its precious cargo in tow.
"I was expecting a whole lot of scenarios where Ten and I would meet up again," Deadpool said as they paddled. "This isn't one of them."
"What were you expecting?" Yusei asked.
"Nearly every scenario ends with us getting covered in alien guts."
The three reached the shore, dragging the unicorn onto the sand. There, the three examined their find. Deadpool lightly slapped the Doctor's face, hoping to rouse him.
"Doc? Hey, Doc? You there?"
No response.
Yusei leaned over and checked for a pulse. "It's there, but not by much," he told the others. "I think we're gonna have to give him mouth-to-"
"DIBS!"
Almost pushing Yusei out of the way, Deadpool partially undid his mask so that his mouth was uncovered. Then, after pinching the Doctor's nose and holding his jaw open, he began to administer mouth-to-mouth.
"Why do I get the feeling this is Deadpool's dream come true?" Lammy whispered to Yusei as they watched the surreal scene unfold.
"Really? I thought him shoving me was a dead giveaway."
After a few seconds, Deadpool's air yielded results as the Doctor began to cough up water. Deadpool sighed in relief. "Okay, hard part's over. Doctor, are you with us?"
The Doctor was now breathing normally, but his eyes remained closed. Suddenly, he began to mutter something.
"Daleks…they're here…"
Deadpool nodded. "Yeah, dude. We figured that one out already."
"They're…they're here…"
"Okay, we went over this," the mercenary deadpanned.
"Are they here for something?" Lammy asked.
Silence. Then the Doctor whispered, "Time…Time Dragon…"
Deadpool began lightly slapping the Doctor's face again. "Time Dragon? What's that? What are you walking about? What do the Daleks want? Doctor? Hey, Doctor?"
It was no use. The Doctor had passed out again.
"Well that just gave us more questions than answers," Yusei complained. "He said something about a Time Dragon?"
"Is that what we've been seeing in these visions?" Lammy asked. "Because the thing in my dream was definitely a vision."
Deadpool shrugged. "Probably. This whole mess has officially gotten serious. And it sounds like the Doctor's already been through the wringer over whatever it is. Can't wait to find out what led him to take a dip in the Pacific Ocean without water wings."
"Well, before we get to any kind of investigation, first things first," Lammy told the others. "We gotta get the Doctor out of here."
"Already on it," Deadpool said, gently lifting the Doctor off the unicorn floaty and onto his shoulders in a fireman's lift. "Holy cow, he really is a lightweight."
"Lammy and I saw some caves earlier," Yusei said, pointing down the beach. "Good place for us to rest while the Doctor recovers. Lammy and I will take the…unicorn thing."
"Yeah, you better," Deadpool said, carefully standing up. The three began walking in the direction of the caves, with Yusei and Lammy carrying the unicorn, and Deadpool carrying the Doctor.
'Time Dragon?' Lammy thought. 'What's that all about? And what do the Daleks want with it? And what's with that song? Why show it to me?'
As they walked down the beach, Deadpool couldn't stop smiling through his mask, which was still partially undone. He looked like he was on top of the world.
"What's got you so happy?" Yusei asked.
"I just kissed the Doctor. Cross another one off my bucket list."
"You have 'kiss the Doctor' on your bucket list?" Lammy asked, amused.
"Not anymore, I don't."
(Meanwhile…)
"HE MANAGED TO FLEE WITH IT," one of the Daleks complained. "WE SHOULD HAVE REALIZED THE DOCTOR WOULD GET INVOLVED. VICTORY IS WITHIN OUR GRASP, WE CANNOT LET UP NOW!"
"I HAVE ALREADY TAKEN CARE OF THAT," another Dalek reassured them. "WE MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO USE THE ORB THE WAY WE WANTED, BUT WE DID MANAGE TO CAPTURE AN ENERGY SIGNATURE FROM IT. WE MIGHT BE ABLE TO USE IT TO TRACK DOWN THE LOCATION OF THE TIME DRAGON. AND WITH IT IN OUR GRASP, NOT EVEN THE DOCTOR WILL BE ABLE TO STAND IN OUR WAY."
The Daleks looked at the large monitor, currently showing all of Earth. "IT'S JUST A MATTER OF TIME. THE TIME DRAGON WILL BE OURS, AS WILL THE UNIVERSE!"
As the Daleks watched the computer search the planet based on the energy signature, only one thought crossed their minds: capture the Time Dragon, and exterminate whatever stood in their way.
(Later…)
The sound of a crackling campfire was the first sign that consciousness was returning. The second sign? A distinct smell of chocolate. Specifically, Hershey's Milk Chocolate bars. The Doctor stirred, trying to find the source of the smell. There were some other smells. Slight smoke from the fire, wood, damp rocks.
"What?"
Slowly, his eyes fluttered open and he looked around.
The first thing he noticed was that he was laying on something that felt distinctly like rubber and plastic. Next, he realized he wasn't wearing his shoes, suit jacket, or trench coat. Looking around as his vision cleared, he took in his current location. He was currently inside a large cave with a high ceiling. He could hear the sound of the ocean waves crashing on the shore outside. Above him, he spotted a few bats.
"What?"
Then he heard something else entirely, something that made him do a double-take.
"Mornin'."
The Doctor abruptly turned his head. Sitting next to him was Deadpool, his mask off as he munched on a s'more.
"What?!"
"I said good morning. Well, it's actually evening, but whatever. It's morning somewhere. Like, in Asia or something."
"Deadpool?! What are you doing here?"
The Doctor tried to sit up, but felt a wave of dizziness wash over him. Deadpool gently pushed him back down, then stood up and walked over to the fire.
"Easy there, Doc," the mercenary said as he roasted another marshmallow. "You apparently had a bit of a weird day. Well, weird for you."
"I'll be standing up faster than most. Time Lord, remember? Again, what are you doing here?"
The mercenary sighed as he got the graham crackers and chocolate ready. "Isn't it obvious, Trench Coat? I answered your distress signal. Speaking of trench coats, your stuff is sitting over there, along with the sonic screwdriver."
Deadpool finished the s'more and walked back to where the Doctor was laying. "Want one?" Deadpool asked, handing the s'more to him.
The Doctor groaned. "The very person I was hoping WOULDN'T get my signal. How bloody convenient. What? Was the Brigadier busy? Also, am I currently lying down on a unicorn?"
Deadpool laughed. "I knew you would notice."
Just then, Yusei and Lammy walked into the cave, carrying bundles of firewood. "Do you have any idea how hard it is to find firewood in southern California?" Lammy asked, laying the wood down.
""I'm glad we found that one camping shop," Yusei said. "But if I hear another surfer say 'radical' one more time, I'm gonna sic Stardust Dragon on myself."
"Yeah, like that would do anything," Deadpool said. "But hey, just in time. Guess who's up?"
Yusei and Lammy, upon noticing the Doctor was awake, waved at him. "Hi, Doctor," Lammy said. "How's it going?"
The Doctor sat up, this time without difficulty, and slowly waved back, baffled. He took a bite of the s'more Deadpool gave him, glad there was something else to focus on. Right now, even he was finding everything difficult to comprehend. But then again, he was still recovering, so there was that.
"You remember Yusei and Lammy, right?" Deadpool asked.
"From the restaurant, yes. Now seriously, you of all people got my distress signal?"
Deadpool nodded enthusiastically. "Yep yep yep. We made our way here, searched for you, found you clinging to a rock just off the shore, and brought you here."
Already feeling his strength returning (the s'more helped), the Doctor stood up and brushed himself off. "Oh. Is that all?"
"Yeah, pretty much," Yusei quickly said. However, the Doctor noticed Deadpool trying to stifle a giggle.
"And what are you having a laugh about?"
"Oh, nothing."
Unconvinced, the Doctor walked over to Yusei and Lammy. "Do you two know something that I don't?" he asked.
Just then, Deadpool blurted out, "I kissed you!", then burst into laughter.
Instantly, the Doctor understood. "He had to give me mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, didn't he?" he asked, his voice showing his hope that it wasn't true. All he got from Yusei and Lammy were guilty stares, confirming his worst fears.
"That's it! My life is officially over!"
"Hey!" Deadpool said, having finally stopped laughing.
"I would've taken literally anyone else in the universe. Why couldn't it have been you two? Hell, I would've taken bloody Captain Jack Harkness giving me the Kiss of Life. But Deadpool? Nope. Nope. Noooooope. How am I ever going to live this down? Now he gets to hold this over my head for the rest of his life. Which, given his healing factor, is already going to be long. How am I going to be able to look at myself in the mirror after this?"
Deadpool looked at him, unamused. "You know I'm standing right here, and can hear everything."
"Oh, I know. And I don't care."
"Wow, how's that for gratitude? You realize my friends and I saved your skinny butt, right? More than that, I gave you a s'more!"
Yusei and Lammy laughed. Only Deadpool would weigh the value of a s'more over the value of somebody's life.
"Yes, well thank you for that. The rescue, I mean. The kissing? Not so much."
"That was PART OF the rescue, Doc," Deadpool reminded him. "Besides, how many times have you been kissed since you regenerated into this body?"
The Doctor paused. "147 times, last I counted."
"I've made my point."
"How do you two survive each other?" Lammy asked. "I'm starting to wonder if Astaria got destroyed simply because of your arguing."
"You guys are probably the weirdest pair of friends ever," Yusei said. "And I usually come home every day to find Jack and Crow bickering about who would get the leftovers. It gets to the point where I eat the leftovers myself and they don't notice for hours. Hey, their loss."
No matter what, there was no dropping the subject for either of them, and they knew it. "Can we at least agree never to talk about it again?" the Doctor asked.
"Yeah, sure," Deadpool said, his fingers crossed; he hoped he would be able to laugh with a future incarnation over it after the whole mess ended.
"Anyway, while I do appreciate your help, all of you, I have bigger concerns on my mind," the Doctor told the others. "There's something going on with the Daleks right now, and I have to stop them before it's too late."
Yusei raided his hand. "Yeah, we already got attacked by a Dalek before we came here."
"What?"
Lammy nodded. "That, and right after we grabbed you, I don't know if you remember, but you muttered something about the Daleks and the 'Time Dragon'. So, what's that all about?"
"And now that we're asking questions, I wanna know just how you got into that situation in the first place," Deadpool added. "What the heck happened to you?"
Figuring he owed them some answers, the Doctor sat down by the fire. "Originally, I came here to California to take a little mini vacation. Even Time Lords need those every once in a while. Specifically, I wanted to learn how to surf. If there's any decade where surfing culture boomed, it was the 1980's. But not long after I got here, I was attacked by a Dalek spying on me. I escaped, and realized there was something else going on. It's never good when the Daleks get involved.
"So I found their ship and snuck in, trying to find out what they were up to. I didn't get any concrete answers, but I did find a strange orb. I didn't recognize it, but I knew it had to be important. So I took it and began my escape."
Deadpool turned to look at you, the readers. "And that's where you guys came in during the prologue. Skip!"
(Skip!)
"After sending the distress signal, I threw the orb into the water and jumped in after it. Now, here I am."
The other three looked at the Doctor, surprised. "That must've been a lot to go through, even for you," Yusei said.
"Exactly, but it doesn't end there. The entire time, I didn't have a clue what the Daleks have been going after. That is, until I was falling towards the water. That's when I received a strange vision. All I heard was a dragon's roar, and all I saw was a flash of gold and silver."
The other three gasped.
"No way!" Deadpool exclaimed. "You too?"
"You're kidding me!" Yusei shouted.
"Okay, now I'm really freaked out," Lammy said.
The Doctor looked at all three of them. "Wait, are you saying you three had the same exact vision?"
The others nodded.
"What is it anyway?" Yusei asked. "Is it the Time Dragon?"
"Yes. The Daleks are after her. And if they are not stopped, they will use the Dragon's power to rewrite history and take over the universe."
"There's more," Lammy said, pulling the orb out of her pocket. "Is this what you were talking about? I found it on the beach."
"Yep, we're done. I'm out of here."
The Doctor snatched the orb out of Lammy's hand, then stood up and walked over to where his stuff sat. As he put back on his jacket, coat, and shoes, the other three stood in shock. "The hell are you doing?" Deadpool asked.
"I've gotten you three into enough trouble as it is. Listen here. As hard as this is, you three need to go back to your own time and forget about the visions. We're going to where I parked the TARDIS, and then I'm taking you all home. Don't worry, I'll have this whole situation handled before you wake up tomorrow morning."
"You expect us to just go home now?" Lammy asked, baffled. "What about the distress signal?"
"That was for someone to get me out of a sticky situation, not aid me in my mission. You've all done your part already."
"In case you've forgotten, the Daleks came after us too," Yusei pointed out.
"Yes, and I shall see to it that they don't do so again. Now, if you'll excuse me…" The Doctor grabbed his sonic screwdriver and put it in his coat pocket.
But Deadpool had had enough. "Doctor, you got a minute?"
"Not now, Deadpool."
"Doc, just hear me out."
The Doctor sighed. "Fine, but you're not changing my mind."
"We'll see about that."
The two friends walked out of the cave and onto the moonlit beach, watching the waves crashing before them. They looked at each other, anticipating the argument that was sure to follow.
"Do you honestly believe we're gonna let you go off on your own, to face a bunch of angry Daleks?" Deadpool asked. "Do you think I will, after everything we've been through?"
"I'm not discussing this with you, Deadpool. I can't let you three get more involved than you already are. This isn't your fight."
"Well, neither was Astaria."
"That's different, and you know it. As the Doctor, the Daleks are my responsibility to defeat. And the universe is my responsibility to protect."
"You know I can count about a thousand people I know personally who would ALSO say they're responsible for the universe," Deadpool pointed out. "Doctor Strange, Scarlet Witch, Phoenix the list goes on. Tell me I'm wrong?"
"Too bad. They're late. And I already called dibs. I'm not letting anyone risk their lives over this. Not to help me."
"Funny, you didn't have that kind of complaint last time."
The Doctor was getting frustrated. "Those circumstances were different. You insisted on saving me from the core AFTER I told you and Rose to get back to the TARDIS. And you weren't doing it for just me either. Besides, I might as well let you have that one since you're a fan. There you go, your 'risk-your-life-for-the-Doctor' allowance. And sorry, you don't get another shot. I wouldn't forgive myself if any of you got hurt, and it turned out to be my own fault."
Deadpool was trying hard not to lose it. "Except we wouldn't be doing it simply for you. I know about the Daleks. Right now, they seem to be up to their old tricks. World domination and all that jazz. I don't know about you, but don't think any of us are gonna stay behind and watch if we know the situation already."
"But how do I know nothing will happen to you three?"
"Are you kidding? You know me. I can bounce back from almost anything I encounter. I doubt even a full Dalek blast will put me down for very long?"
"And your friends? What about them?"
Deadpool pointed inside the cave. "Those guys. Yusei and Lammy are two of the bravest people I know. Lammy survived being sent to literal Hell, spent ages holding back the spirit of an ancient witch, and then fought said witch inside her own head for the fate of the world. Yusei? He's battled and defeated multiple world-ending threats with just a deck of cards, and ALSO fought that exact witch with nothing but Lammy's guitar. And through the ordeal with Namora, their love for each other endured. You won't find a couple with more heart and soul than Yusei and Lammy. Trust me. Those two have some serious guts.
"And besides, if you lose, I'm pretty sure we're all dead anyway. Lastly, it's just like you told me back on Astaria. We're already here. We might as well help."
The Doctor sighed. "You're dead set on this?"
"Yeah. Not every day I get to save the universe with a time-traveling buddy. Man, Cable's gonna be so jealous."
"Then I guess there's no convincing you otherwise," the Doctor said, and the two shook hands. "Now let's see what the others think."
They both walked back into the cave, where Yusei and Lammy were roasting more marshmallows. The Doctor walked back up to them and began to speak.
"I still don't like this, but if you two want to join, I can't change your mind. So what do you say? You want to join me in stopping the Daleks from rewriting the entire space-time continuum?"
Yusei smiled. "Did you even have to ask, Doctor?"
"Yeah," Lammy said. "We're not gonna just sit and watch. I'd be happy to help, however I can."
Deadpool smirked. "There you have it. Looks like we're all in this for real, now."
"Don't forget, part of the reason we're here is that you ruined our date," Yusei snarked.
"You ruined their date?" the Doctor asked, amused.
"In my defense, that was where I found your distress signal, and where we got attacked by that Dalek."
"And when this is over, you're gonna make sure they still want MilkCan to perform there after what happened," Lammy demanded. "Otherwise, we'll be lucky to score a gig at that place."
"Oh."
"Yeah, we were also there to see if her band could perform," Yusei explained.
"Right."
Lammy laughed. "For what it's worth, Yusei and I have a bit of a loophole to make this situation more enjoyable," she explained. "The way we see it, we're technically still on our date."
The Doctor groaned. "Seriously, please don't make me regret letting you two join after only five minutes. I didn't agree to this just so you two could be all lovey-dovey the whole time."
"You can talk, Mr. 'Lovingly Stroke Bits of The TARDIS The Way Someone Does Their Partner'," Deadpool quipped.
"Kinda the same way you treat chimichangas? And from what I've heard, a life-size standee of Bea Arthur."
"Oh ha ha. I am so gonna kill Bob for that one."
The Doctor smirked, and Deadpool briefly removed his mask (which he had put back on somewhere between the s'more thing and now) to stick his tongue out, prompting the Doctor to do the same.
"You know, up to this point, I doubted a little bit how it was THIS incarnation that befriended the Doctor," Yusei said. "But now, I don't think I really need to ask."
"By the way, what IS that orb?" Lammy asked.
"It's connected to the Time Dragon," the Doctor explained. "I don't know how yet, but the Daleks were able to get their hands on it. But if it's connected to the Dragon, we might be able to use the orb to track her down. I think that's the first thing we should do. If we can find the Time Dragon, we'll have a much easier time protecting her. And maybe the orb might have an energy signature we can track."
"So we just have the TARDIS lock onto that signature and she'll take us to the dragon?" Yusei asked.
The Doctor shook his head. "Unfortunately, the TARDIS isn't advanced enough to track something as powerful as the Time Dragon. Even my sonic screwdriver wouldn't be able to do it. That's where the Daleks have an advantage, unfortunately. But I do know someone who can help."
"Like who?" Deadpool asked.
"He's an alien currently hiding out in 18th century England, specifically Oxford University. He owes me a bit of a favor. And lucky for us, he has the technology to track that signature and get us heading in the right direction."
Deadpool gave a whoop of cheer. "That means TARDIS trip!"
Yusei and Lammy looked at each other. "We get to go to 18th century England!" they both exclaimed.
"Hell yeah!" Deadpool exclaimed again. "The Merc with a Mouth and the Oncoming Storm, joining forces for another epic team up. I'm gonna enjoy every second of this.
The excited shouts coming out of their mouths were enough to make the Doctor cover his ears. "Well, we're off to an explosive start. I hope you lot can put that energy to use when we face the Daleks again."
"Sp, off to the TARDIS?" Deadpool asked cheerily.
"Yep," the Doctor replied, popping the "p".
Everyone gathered their stuff (Deadpool remembering to store away the remaining s'mores ingredients), and after putting the fire out, they all exited the cave, and the Doctor began leading everyone to the TARDIS. As they walked, Yusei and Lammy took the time to chat about the situation they now found themselves in. And they were talking it in stride, all things considered.
"So just to make sure I have this right," Yusei said. "In just a few hours, we went from enjoying the Rock n' Roll Steakhouse to getting attacked by a Dalek, whisked away to the 1980's, and now we're teaming up with Deadpool and the Tenth Doctor to save some kind of dragon?"
"I know," Lammy whispered, excited. "This is gonna be fun. And dangerous. But also fun."
"Pretty sure 'fun' and 'dangerous' don't usually go hand in hand," Yusei whispered back.
"They do now."
In front of them, Deadpool and the Doctor were in the middle of their own conversation.
"It seems we both have a knack for befriending people who know how to get into danger," the Doctor said. "Or the danger finds them. Whichever comes first. In my line of work, it's pretty even."
"Preaching the choir there, Doc," Deadpool responded. "But hey, if we can face ancient sorceresses and alien warlords together, Daleks should be a walk in the park."
"Be careful, Wade. Daleks never go down without a fight."
As they walked, the Doctor took an opportunity to do a side glance towards Lammy, who didn't seem to notice.
He turned his attention back to Deadpool. "What do you remember about Namora?"
"That she was an evil witch who tried to possess my friend through the necklace she was trapped in, kill us all with an army of goblins, and take over the world. Why do you ask?"
"Because I hope I can talk to Lammy about it."
"If it's to help with the trauma of it all, she's pretty much recovered apart from the occasional nightmare."
"I know. I just want to ask her a few things. Her story, I am way too curious not to ask about it."
And as the four walked, the Doctor made one more glance at Lammy. Having heard her story, he wanted to get his own answers, as well as give Lammy some answers she probably wanted.
No doubt, this was gonna be one interesting adventure.
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Interesting, indeed.
Leave it to Deadpool to sneak into a cereal factory to steal the toy prize things. Leave it to him to stumble into his friends' date and subsequently ruin it. Leave it to Deadpool to immediately jump at the chance to kiss the Doctor. Is there anything this knucklehead won't do? He's literally the easiest person to star in a Klondike commercial, because he would definitely do anything for a Klondike bar.
Our team of misfits are headed to Oxford, to cash in on that favor from a friend (who, by the way, is NOT a canon Doctor Who character, so don't ask). That, and get into plenty of hijinx along the way. Also, the next chapter will see the Doctor telling the story of the mysterious Time Dragon.
Until then, be sure to read and review, fave and follow, and check out all of my other stories. I will see you guys next time, once I try to figure out how many times you can hear "tubular" in a day without losing your mind.
TheMasterKat out!
