CHAPTER FIVE – They Talk
Ron's instinct to comfort Hermione overrode any other emotions he might have had and he stepped toward her with his arms open. Much to his surprise she gave a cry and then threw herself into him, wrapping her arms around him and burying her face in his chest. Ron immediately pulled her into a comforting hug and she snuggled into him. Ron could feel her crying against him and he realized that he had always wanted to hold Hermione like this but he'd never had the chance. He was amazed how good it felt and how well she fit in his arms. Ron closed his eyes and reveled in the feeling. He had always wanted to hold her like this, but under better circumstances for sure.
They stood there silently as Ron waited patiently for her to make the next move. He just held her close and enjoyed the hug.
After some moments, Hermione leaned back but did not let go of Ron and looked him in the eyes. Ron looked back at her with concern.
"Ron?"
"yeah"
"What are you doing here?" She let go of Ron and took a step back with a slight blush on her face. She seemed a bit embarrassed by her reaction to seeing him.
"Uhm, you looked upset Hermione when you ran off and I just needed to make sure that you're ok. You're still my best friend and I was concerned about you. Can we go somewhere and talk? The room of requirement isn't too far and we can chat there if you want."
"Aren't you worried about your girlfriend?"
Ron gave a small laugh. "No, she encouraged me to go after you, she'll be ok with us talking, it's ok. She said she'd be there when I get back, so don't worry."
With that, Ron gently guided Hermione down the hallway towards the seventh floor.
Once again Ron was impressed at how well the Room seemed to know what was needed. Ron and Hermione sat down in two overstuffed chairs in front of a cheery fire. A pot of tea with two cups was on the table in front of them.
Ron asked, "tea?"
"Please"
"Short cream, no sugar right?"
Hermione's eyes widened, "how do you know how I take my tea?"
"Hermione," Ron said with a scoff. "We've been friends for five years, of course I know how you take your tea. I know lots about you, just so you know, I do pay attention to important things, maybe not in class, but important things, like how you take your tea, that strawberry scones are your favorite, you don't like brussel sprouts and that you like cake better than pie for dessert, when you allow yourself to eat dessert, which is only on weekends. I pay attention to the important things and you are one of the important things. You and Harry, you know, you've been the important things."
Hermione sighed and sipped her tea. "Doesn't seem that way now, especially since you got yourself a girlfriend."
"Well, that's probably true. After your comment about the luck potion and stuff, I realized that maybe I wasn't as important to you as I hoped. But you're important enough for me to be concerned when you're upset. I'm here right now because you're important."
Hermione just looked down in her cup and said softly, "thanks."
Ron put down his tea and became more serious than Hermione had seen in quite a while. "So, what was it that upset you, Hermione? Why did you run off? Can I help?"
Hermione gave a mirthless laugh. "Oh yes, Ronald you can help. It's Luna."
"Luna? How can she make anyone upset?"
"Really Ron? It's seeing you with Luna. I have to look at you and Luna all the time being together and seeing you up there in front of everyone with your arm around her and it was just too much. I had to leave."
"Yeah, that's what I thought, but I wasn't sure, I wanted to hear it from you."
"Are you really going to make me say it?"
"Yeah, I think it's important to say it out loud. I think we've been keeping our feelings secret for too long and it's time to actually face the truth and be truthful with each other."
Hermione hesitated, started to speak, stopped, then started again. "Ok, I'm jealous, ok? I admit it, I wish it were me that you had your arm around. I'm the one that should be your girlfriend, ok and it hurts to see her with you."
Hermione bowed her head and covered her face with her hands.
Ron leaned forward, put his elbows on his knees and rested his head in his hands as he just looked at her.
"Two months ago I would have loved to hear that from you, but I never got any positive signs from you. I had no clue you fancied me and I thought I was being obvious that I wanted to be with you. You're beautiful and intelligent and passionate and you really care about Harry so I couldn't help but love you. I couldn't tell you cared for me, there were no obvious signs, but there were lots of negatives, from not believing I was a prefect and then especially that dig about my quidditch skills."
Hermione kept her face hidden as she replied, "I'm so sorry about that Ron, I regretted saying that as soon as I did. I don't even know why I said it."
"Luna says it's because your hierarchy of priorities puts 'following the rules and being right' above people's feelings. She said you were more concerned about the rules than me, and I think she's right."
"Oh Ron, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry! You and I know that my interpersonal skills are terrible."
Ron leaned back in his chair and rubbed the back of his neck. "Let me ask you a question, Hermione, how do you show love? How did you show that you fancied me?"
"I don't know."
"Exactly. I tried to show you love by complimenting you whenever I could, by defending you against the Slytherins and Snape, by making sure you left the library often enough to eat and sleep, by trying to take care of you. Does that make sense?"
"It does."
"So I think you need to figure out how it is that you show love. How would anyone know that you might love them?"
"I don't know, I don't know, I've never thought about it."
"Exactly."
"You still do those things for me, why? You still want to take care of me it seems."
"I still have feelings for you Hermione, but now I'm enjoying being with Luna."
Hermione's head popped up. "Really, even after all that, you still care?"
"Of course. You've been my best friend for five years and I've loved you since third year. Those feelings just don't disappear, they just change a bit, I guess."
"But what about Luna?"
"Things are calm and peaceful and comfortable with her. Luna is a bit different from us, but that's been a good thing. She's helped me realize that I didn't need anyone's approval to live the way I want or to do things my way, sorta like she's been living her life. If I'm not looking for approval, I don't have to be so nervous or insecure about messing up. It's kinda like 'why worry about the score when you're not playing the game?' It's been really nice, and I really like being with her, she's been wonderful for me."
"Oh Ron, I'm trying to be better, I'm trying to not nag or criticize, I'm really trying."
"I know, Hermione and it's been great. Everyone agrees that you're easier to be around now and you're much more fun than before. I know I appreciate what you're doing. We all still love you, Hermione and we want you to be happy."
Ron smiled at her as he stood up. "Well, I think I'll go find Luna. She'll be interested in what happened."
"What will you tell her?"
"I'll simply say we talked, we talked about us and why you were upset and how we still care for each other."
"You'll tell her you still have feelings for me? Why would you do that?"
"Because it's true. Luna and I agreed at the beginning to be truthful with one another, and I think it's important."
"Oh, ok"
Ron headed toward the door and then turned around to face Hermione.
"And I think it's something that we should agree on. From now on, we should be completely truthful with each other, at least I'm going to try. It's interesting to think about how things would be different if we'd been truthful for the last five years."
Hermione sat there and watched Ron leave. "Ron!" she called out just before he left. "Thank you for coming after me, and I will try to be truthful as well."
Ron smiled and replied as he left, "excellent, see you, 'Mione."
