JENNIE
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It was the third day since I had woken up when Tae walked into the room. He was carrying a dozen red roses, and in the center, one daisy. I had been watching TV, but my mind wasn't on the show or the things my mother randomly chattered on about.
"Tae," my mother said, sounding delighted.
I stared at him and he did the same with me. We didn't speak. I wasn't going to say anything until he did. I'd woken up from a coma three days ago. Where had he been? At football practice? Bington was only an hour's drive away.
"Hey," he said as I sat still and unblinking.
I remained silent.
Mom stood up and made an excuse to leave the room and give us some time. I didn't respond to her. The words take him with you were on the tip of my tongue.
"I'm sorry I wasn't here when you woke up. Everyone thought you'd want me to go on to practice. If I didn't show up for practice, I'd lose my scholarship. I had to make a decision, Jennie."
Again. He had three days to find time to get here to see me. "I understand why you went and why you weren't here when I woke up."
He could read between the lines. He was a smart guy. Always had been. I didn't need to spell it out for him.
He put the flowers in the silver vase by the bedside table and reached for my hand. "I stayed here at first. I didn't leave. But my parents and your family insisted it was unhealthy and that you wouldn't want me to do that."
Surprisingly, he still didn't get it. Maybe he'd had too many licks to the head so far in college football. I hadn't been expecting to feel so hard toward him. This was new. Since I had woken up and realized he wasn't here, I hadn't been angry. Just unattached. I couldn't explain it. Somehow I had just accepted things had changed, and no tears or heartache came with that.
"I understand why you weren't here," I repeated.
He frowned and ran his thumb over my hand. "You aren't happy to see me now."
"It's been three days," I finally said. He wasn't going to get it otherwise.
He sighed and nodded. "I know. I didn't get JK's message until yesterday. We practice all day and I crash at night. I hadn't had my phone even charged until last night."
Yet his girlfriend was in a coma. He hadn't charged his phone. Still he saw nothing odd about this. Maybe he had always been this way and I had just accepted it. During my time in the coma it seemed I had changed. Not him. Me.
"I see" was my response.
Before, I would have kissed him and held him close and said I was so happy to see him. I would have asked about football and all he had been doing. I would have done and said whatever I needed to make him smile. Now … I just didn't care.
"You're hurt," he said, looking upset. "God, Jennie, I am so sorry. I swear if I hadn't been so damn exhausted from practice every day I would have thought about the fact I needed to keep my phone charged. I should have been here as soon as you opened your eyes. I'll never forgive myself for that."
He seemed sincere. But the tug at my heart he used to control wasn't there anymore. Was it because I had been asleep for so long? I wasn't sure what had happened.
The door opened and Nurse Chaeng walked in. "I see you have more company. But it's time for your rehab. Get those muscles moving. I'm excited to see what you can do today since you surprised us all yesterday with your determination."
I had pushed until I couldn't push anymore yesterday. I wanted out of here and I wanted my life back. Or, possibly, a different life back. "I'm ready. He was just leaving," I replied, glancing back at Tae.
"Thanks for coming to see me. Good luck with football," I said, and he winced. It had been cold. I knew that, but I didn't have any warmth for him.
"I'm going to wait here. I don't want to leave you."
I didn't want to come back here after the grueling workout they would put me through and deal with more of this. "No. I'd rather you not. I'll see you next time."
He looked defeated. There was a small part of me that felt guilty about that. The look on his face and the way my words were affecting him. I wasn't sure if it was from the habit I had of trying to make him happy, or if I should truly feel guilty about how I was treating him.
I reminded myself that he had taken three days to get here to see me. Three. Even his best guy friend had stopped by to check on me before he had. That had spoken volumes.
"I'll be back tomorrow," he promised.
"Okay" was all I said. Not sure I believed him.
He left the room after one long look at me for more than an okay.
Once he was gone I turned back to Chaeng, who had become a friend—if a nurse could become a friend. She was kind and liked to make me laugh with her jokes. I preferred her over the other nurse, Somi. I had actually requested only Chaeng take me to rehabilitation every day. On Chaeng's days off, another nurse named Yeri came in to help.
"Let me guess. Taehyung," she said, raising her eyebrows.
I nodded. "Yep."
"Does he realize he's a little late?"
I shrugged. "Yeah, but I don't think I can care enough to really say anything more about it to him. Before, he was my world. But now … he isn't. There are more important things for me to focus on."
She nodded in agreement. "Like kicking ass today in the gym."
I laughed. Chaeng made me do that often. "Yes, like kicking ass today in the gym."
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