"Dude, stop sweating like that or you're gonna give us away."

"I'm sorry," Peter wiped a hand above his brow and it came back shiny, "I'm nervous."

MJ rolled her eyes. "You need this so badly."

"I do not!" Peter protested, then paused. "Why?"

She exhaled in amusement, "'Cause you're such a goodie-two-shoes, that's why."

Peter huffed. He was not. He did rebellious stuff all the time. Like… sneaking out. That wasn't something goodie-two-shoes would do.

Right?

"This better work or May's gonna be so disappointing in me."

MJ rolled her eyes. "Calm down, Rikkie makes these things all the time."

"I still look-"

"Like you're twelve?" MJ finished for him.

"Hey!" he protested, even if it was true.

"If you guys don't stop bickering, we're gonna get caught for sure," Ned interjected.

"Fine."

"Fine."

"Good, now let's act like the adults we are."

Peter rolled his eyes. "Just 'cause we pretend we're adults, doesn't mean we are."

"That attitude isn't helpful, Peter."

He sighed. "Sorry." He nodded to himself. "This is gonna be fun. This is gonna be great. We're fine."

"That's it, Peter! It's gonna be super fun!"

"I guess you're right. It will be kinda fun to-"

"Act your age for once instead of like an old man?" MJ finished with a grin.

Peter let out a breathy laugh and shook his head. "Yeah, maybe."

Turning the corner, Peter's eyes landed on their destination, half a block down. His feet stalled and his fingers wrapped around the hem of his shirt, tugging and twirling nervously. The budding excitement was squashed, turning into a knot in the pit of his stomach.

"I dunno about this, guys. I think this was a bad idea." MJ and Ned paused, looking back. Peter ran a hand through his hair and averted his eyes so he wouldn't have to see MJ's unimpressed stare. "Maybe we should just do something el-"

"Peter." Two hands were on either side of Peter's face and they tugged it so it was less than a foot away at Ned's face. "You need this. Your whole life has been leading up to this. You can't turn back now."

Peter's eyebrows crinkled. "M' 'hole l'fe?" He tried to say through his smushed face.

"Yes!" Ned cried and released Peter's face. "Doing this is like an initiation ceremony for being a teenager."

Peter sighed and fell back into stride with them, tailing right behind Ned, who was still making his speech, arms flailing about.

The brick walls were inching closer and closer, their black paint standing out against the others like a sore thumb. The dark entryway was like a black-hole, sucking in everyone around it. Literally. Almost every person on the block was going inside that door.

Peter felt sick. And giddy. Like his body couldn't decide if he was excited or nervous.

"ID." The bouncer's monotone voice was booming as the adult in front of them forked over his card.

That man went inside.

The bouncer's eyes squinted as three of them approached and he raised an eyebrow. "IDs."

Adrenaline flooded Peter's legs when the man's eyes landed on him. His hand shook as he extended 'his' ID outwards. God, the man was huge and had the biggest forearms Peter had ever seen - even bigger than Thor's.

The man scanned the ID, looking at Peter then at the picture. Then at Peter, then at the birth date. Then Peter. And stayed there - stare unrelenting.

Peter gave a cheap smile.

The man's expression didn't change.

Just when the confession that was brewing on Peter's tongue for the past half hour was about to spill out, MJ came to the rescue, stepping in between them and cutting off the bouncer's gaze.

"We good?"

There was more silence.

"Yeah." The man's voice was so deep, like holy-

MJ nodded and pushed through the door, Ned following quietly and then Peter who timidly took 'his' ID back, feeling it was made of water and he was a witch.

Ugh. He needed to chill.

Take a breath. Let the calm wash over-

As soon as he stepped inside, the sound hit him. Or sounds - so many sounds, coming from all different angles and all just as loud as the other.

God, it was so chaotic.

And busy.

There were so many people, laugh-yelling and yelling-yelling over the noise.

"Uh…" Peter started, stopping when he realized he couldn't even hear himself. He clamped his mouth shut.

Another person entered the door, bumping into Peter. Peter waved a 'sorry' but the person just gave him a weird look.

"Maybe- MAYBE WE SHOULD GET OUT OF THE WAY OF THE DOOR?" Peter yelled at his friends.

"YEAH I-" Ned got bumped into by another person coming inside "-THINK YOU'RE RIGHT!"

"THIS WAY!" MJ now yelled, motioning for them to follow her.

MJ led them to a booth near the windows and far away from the bar and pool tables. It still wasn't quiet, but at least it put enough distance between them and the source of the noises so they could actually hear themselves think.

"Jeez." Peter muttered.

"Yeah, it's, uh, louder than I was expecting." MJ concurred.

"Are bars always like this?" Ned asked, sliding into the booth with MJ as Peter took the other side.

With a shrug, MJ grabbed the standing drink menu. "Maybe? It is Friday night, mind you."

"Let's not dwell on it, I'm sure we'll get used to it soon anyway!" Ned exclaimed with a big smile. "So. Anything good on the menu?"

"Uh… I don't know? I don't know what any of this is." MJ handed the menu to Ned who looked at it, perplexed before giving it to Peter.

Peter's eyes flitted over the names, none of them looking familiar. A lot of things seemed to have vodka - pretty much the only alcohol he even knew of besides whiskey.

Then he noticed the prices.

"It's so expensive," Peter hissed.

MJ waved a hand in front of her face, "we got you covered."

"Yeah! MJ and I will pay for you!"

"Aww!" A big smile melted Peter's face. "You guys don't have to…"

MJ rolled her eyes. "Don't thank us yet." She leaned forward, squinting. "I wanna know how many drinks it's gonna take to get you hammered."

Peter blinked and leaned back. "Probably not that many."

"Don't you have a great metabolism though?" Ned asked.

"Well yeah, but I'm still human. A lot of alcohol is gonna enter my bloodstream, just like you guys. Metabolism doesn't matter at that point."

"But you're superhuman!"

"I still have blood, and alcohol still affects my brain like you guys." He paused. "Also I have, like, 5% body fat. If anything, I'm gonna get drunk really easily."

MJ made a thoughtful noise. "I guess you have a point, but alcohol is absorbed into muscles, which you have a ton of, so I say it's still gonna take more to get you drunk. A bit more, at least."

Peter gave a crooked smile in response. She was so smart.

"So what should we get… uh," Ned drawled, eyes crinkling as he tried to read the drink menu, "a joger, uh, jagger bomb?"

"You mean jäger bomb?" MJ asked.

"Yagger?"

"Yeah."

"Oh."

"I'm pretty sure those are, like, known as one of the most disgusting drinks?"

"Are they?"

"I think?"

"Well, what about a moscow mule," Peter suggested. "Those are… good… right?"

MJ shrugged. Ned shrugged.

"Okie then."

"Why is there something called 'penicillin' on here? What're they gonna come over with a pill or shavings from blue cheese?" Ned's eyebrows furrowed. "Adults are weird."

Peter and MJ chuckled.

"I bet it's disgusting." Peter said.

"I bet you're right," MJ concurred.

"Hey there dolls, how're you doin'?" A waitress came up beside theri table, notepad tucked into her apron pocket and hands on her hips as she gazed down at them.

"Oh, uh, hi," Ned choked out, flushing and unable to meet her eyes.

Peter rolled his eyes and MJ smirked.

The waitress' eyes flitted over Ned and she raised an eyebrow, but didn't say anything about his furious blushing. "My name's Traci, can I interest you young kids in a drink?"

"We're not kids!" Peter blurted out way too loudly and quickly. MJ kicked him and he cleared his throat. "We're twenty-one. Each of us. We're adults. Definitely, ha ha…"

"Dude," MJ hissed.

Peter gave a helpless throat squeak.

Traci looked amused, clearly not buying their crap.

"He's right," Ned interjected, "and can I say, you're sooooooo…. uh, so pretty."

"Thanks hun. Now can I get you 'adults' a drink or do you need more time with the menus?"

"Uh… we'll get, uh, Moscow, uh, moscow mule?" Peter stuttered.

Traci paused, pen on paper. "You sure? For youngsters your age, I'd suggest you try something more on the sweet side. We have Mai Tais."

"What's that?"

"It's a sweeter, tropical type cocktail."

"Uh," Peter looked to MJ and Ned and shrugged. "Sure."

"Sounds good, sweetums. I'll put you guys down for a single."

"A single?" Ned asked.

"Instead of a double."

"Ah. I… I, uh, see…"

With that, Traci left.

"What's a 'double'?" Ned whispered.

Peter shrugged. "Two… drinks…?"

MJ also shrugged. "Don't look at me. I don't know."

"Do you think she figured out that we're not…?"

"Oh yeah, absolutely she did."

"Yep. That's what I thought."

"She's so smart," Ned smiled all dreamy, chin resting in the palm of his hand. "And pretty."

"Dude." Peter said flatly.

"She's, like, thirty-five or something." MJ added with an eyeroll.

Ned sighed in defeat. "I know."

"That'd be, like, Peter pining after Stark."

The gasp of horror that punched out of Peter made the heads of the booth across from them turn in his direction.

"Dude." MJ said.

"DUDE!" Peter hissed. "He's like- he's-"

"He's your not-dad?"

"He is not! I barely even know him. He's just… he's y'know, Mr. Stark."

"You gotta admit, objectively speaking, he has a nice ass."

"MJ! Oh my god!"

MJ and Ned met each other's eyes before laughing.

Crossing his arms, Peter sat back with a grumpy look. "Jerks."

"Oh come on, Peter," MJ drawled, giving him a friendly punch in the arm. "You know we're just teasing you."

Peter huffed. "I know."

"Yeah, Peter, we're only jealous that you have the freaking billionair Tony hecking Stark looking out for you!"

"He just cares 'cause I'm-" Peter quickly glanced around then lowered his voice "-Spider-Man."

"Dude, you seriously believe that?" MJ asked, giving him a flat look.

"Yes?"

"He doesn't check-up on all the others as much as he does you."

"Well, yeah, but that's just 'cause I'm a ki- Adult. A twenty-one year old adult!"

"Yelling that out loud is more suspicious, you do understand that, sweetie, right?" Traci appeared, tray in hand, at the foot of their table. "Here you darlings are. Three Mai Tais. Hope you enjoy 'em."

With that, she whisked away.

"She definitely knows." Ned nodded.

"You think?" MJ's voice was flat and she sipped her drink. "Ooh. That's good. Kinda strong."

Ned coughed a little when he sipped his. "Pretty good! Very tropical. Isn't Traci the best at suggesting drinks?"

MJ and Peter shared another eye roll.

With that, their night ensued. Laughter continued, drinks were ordered, and snacks were munched. As time passed, Peter really started to relax. All the noise faded into the background and his mind dulled into a calming buzz. Ned and MJ were the best - he loved them. He told them that. They told him he was the best. At that point, Peter's vision started to drift and his movements somehow felt both sluggish and sporadic?

And then he really had to pee.

"I gotta pee."

"If you pee now, you'll keep having to go every, like, twenty minutes," MJ informed him.

"Huh?"

She shrugged, taking a swig of her third Mai Tai, "Th't's what they all say."

"'Ve never heard that."

"Ok."

"Be right back."

Peter pulled himself out of the booth, tipping a little as he stood. His gaze drifted over the divider wall as he looked out across the bar in search of the bathroom sign.

That's when he noticed him.

Peter felt his eyes turn to saucers and of course he zeroed in on Peter.

Peter dropped, earning a jump from each of his friends.

"What's-" Ned started.

"SSSHHH!" Peter army-crawled back into his seat, slumping deep into the cushions.

"Everyone be cool. Be cool. Be cool. Be cool." Peter hissed.

It was MJ's turn to try and ask a question. "Wha're you talking abou-"

"Be cool!"

"Well hello there." That voice. God it was him - Peter wasn't imagining it.

"Shit!" Peter whispered and dipped his head, trying to shield his face with his hand.

"Kid."

Clearing his throat, Peter tried to make his voice low. "I'm not a kid. I'm an adult."

"Peter. Peter Parker."

"You have me mistake-"

"Kid." His voice was more resolute this time.

Peter looked up and was immediately met with stern brown eyes and a goatee. "Hhhheeeeyyyyy Mr. Stark…."

He nodded once and sipped his drink. "Kid."

"Oh shit!" Ned said, snapping out of his daze. MJ cursed under her breath.

Wood creaked as Tonys leaned against the booth, shadow hovering over Peter. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but you're not old enough to be in here."

"No sir, we are not," Ned answered before Peter had a chance.

Ice clacked in Tony's glass as he took another sip from his drink, rolling his eyes so far back, only white was visible for a solid seven seconds.

Then he looked at them, face reticent. He looked at Ned, who squeaked and turtles as far as he could into his shirt. Then MJ whose eyes darted away. Then Peter, who gave a cheap smile, trying desperately to hide the panic flaring in his chest.

Then he looked down at the booth seat and waved a hand at it.

"I'm going to sit here, so you move over."

"Oh." Peter said, panic deflating to make room for confusion. He hurried and shovelled himself farther into the booth. "You're sitting with us…?"

"Someone's gotta keep an eye on you rascals." He side-eyed Peter. "Since I'm assuming May doesn't know you're here."

Peter's heart leapt into his throat and he swallowed painfully, eyes wide and face slack. "Please don't tell her!"

"Stark." Traci reappeared, fist on her cocked hip. "You looking after these kids here?"

Tony inhaled. "I suppose I am."

"Need something stronger?" She nodded at his almost empty glass.

Tony smiled with charm, chuckling a bit. "Unfortunately, It looks like I'm DDing tonight. I will take a coffee, when you've got the chance."

"Anything for you, love." Traci smiled. "What about you kids?"

"Oh uh," Peter's eyes flicked to Tony, who was watching him. "I-I'm good."

"You sure?" Tony asked. "Have you tried a pornstar yet? You'd like it."

Peter's face went bright red. "P-p- uh."

"They'll each get one, cocktail version, please."

"Comin' right up." With that, Traci was gone once more.

"Uh…" Peter said intelligently.

"You came here to drink, didn't you?" Tony raised an eyebrow at him. The distress must've shown in Peter's face, because Tony waved a dismissive hand. "It's fine, kid. All I care about is that you're being safe. As far as I'm concerned, you drinking at a bar is better than doing it alone and unsupervised."

He downed the rest of his drink. "Besides, you really think I'd be in the right to judge." He chuckled mirthlessly to himself, eyes getting a bit of that haunted look they had sometimes. He shook his head. "Although, I can't say I'm not a bit disappointed. Sneaking into a bar? But, at the same time, colour me impressed. Never thought you'd be breaking any sort of rules. Still, as the adult here, I have to be adamant that I don't approve. You got me?"

Peter swallowed, mouth dry. "Uh….?"

"Good."

Having Tony there was weird at first, but it turned out to be kinda fun. He had good suggestions for drinks and taught them a couple drinking games, like taking a sip every time Ned blushed in Traci's presence. A really old ACDC song was playing at one point, and Tony started singing. He wasn't too bad. Peter, on the other hand, sounded amazing! He'd never sounded so good before! But he was, like, superstar level good.

Every so often a snack would appear on their table or a water would be in Peter's hand that he didn't remember ordering.

It was a good night.

"'Ts gettin' late. We should ge' going." MJ slurred, standing up. She frowned and patted her hair then her pockets. "What am I f'rgettin?"

Peter shrugged. Ned squinted in thought.

"Could I get the bill?" Peter heard Tony say.

"The bill!" Peter perked up and pointed at MJ. "Tha's wha' we were f'rgetting!"

"The bill!" MJ said back with wide eyes.

"Don't worry about, I've got it covered," Tony said.

"You d'nt haf to-" Ned started.

The bill arrived and Peter's heart almost gave out when he saw the total. "$145?! OH MY GOD!"

"$145?!" MJ and Ned echoed.

Tony smirked and handed his card to Traci. They shared a couple whispers and chuckles.

"Alright, here's your receipt. Hope you kids had fun. I better not see you in here again too soon." With that, Traci was off for the last time.

"I love you…" Ned whispered, face rosy.

"DRINK!" MJ and Peter yelled and pointed at Ned as they'd been doing all night.

Peter didn't have a drink drink left, so he took a sip of water instead.

"Everyone got all their stuff?" Tony asked.

All three of them nodded.

"I'll drop you kids off."

"You d'n't hafta do that," Peter insisted.

Tony just raised an eyebrow. "Well I'm not letting you walk home in this state, so you don't really have a choice in the matter."

"Weren't you dr'nking, tho?" MJ piped up.

"I was. But I'm sober now. Well, sober enough to legally drive, that is."

All three of them look at eachother then shrugged.

. . .

"Bye, Ned!" Peter waved out from the passenger seat window.

They'd dropped off MJ a few minutes ago, so now it was just Peter left.

Tony pulled away from the curb.

"Th'nks fer paying. Tha' was nice."

"No problem, kid."

At the intersection, the car turned left.

"Y're suppose to t'rn right." Peter pointed in the direction of the other street.

"If I were taking you home, yes."

"Wait. Wha?" Peter swivelled his head to look at Tony, who side-eyed him. "Where're you… Oh man, are you g'nna mu'der me? Mom alw'ys said not to talk ta' str'ngers."

"I"m insulted that a) you think we're 'strangers'-"

"Well, sorta. We don't, like know know eachother. You know?"

"Mmmm, no."

"You see!" Peter pointed at him. "If you knew me, you'd know wha I m'n."

The man let out a breathy chuckle and shook his head. "I'm not taking you home yet, because if you walk through your front door in this state, your aunt is gonna know where you've been."

"Wait. Wha?" He blinked. "No….."

"Yes, she will."

"Nu uh." Peter shook his head, a couple loose curls smacking his eyes.

"Yuh huh."

"You don' know wha yer talkin' about."

"I think I'm the only one here who does know what they're talking about, actually."

"Ppppffff," Peter burst into laughter. Tony was funny. "I guess you're right!"

The man just smirked, shaking his head again. "So, what's your craving? Every drunk person has one. McDonalds? Taco Bell-"

"PIZZA!" Peter threw his hand up and smacked them on the roof of the car. "Ow."

"Pizza it is-"

"From Eddies in Midtown!"

Tony looked at him, eyes warm. "You got it, boss."