Legend felt like he'd rather have been turned inside out.

As it was, he was laid flat on his back in a field feeling absolutely rotten.

So all in all, nothing too unusual.

"Am I dead this time?" he asked the serene blue sky.

The large form of Time suddenly obstructed his view.

Legend groaned and covered his eyes with his arm. "That answers that. I've gone to hell."

The relatively tall Link rolled his eye before dragging the petulant one to his feet.

"I'm glad you still have your sense of humour," Time rumbled.

"Who said anything funny?" Legend sniped back.

Time rolled his eye again. Legend scowled.

"And why are you so unaffected?" he griped, straightening his hat.

"I was taught two different types of teleportation magic when I was nine. I'm sure you can fill in the blanks."

"It's a wonder any of us survived to adolescence."

"Hm."

Now that Legend wasn't moping on the ground, he noticed that Hyrule was absent. Time saw the look on his face before he could ask the question.

"The traveller is still saying his goodbyes."

"For so long?"

"Vet," Time actually looked rather stern. "You need to cut the act."

"Pft, what act?"

"That act. Your nonchalance."

"It's not an act and I don't answer to you big guy; certainly not now when we're getting out of each other's hair."

"I don't care about your defence mechanisms, but I'll give you three guesses as to who might."

"Hmph."

"That's right. In case you hadn't noticed with your 'not an act', he's been taking this… not greatly."

"He'll get over it."

"It'll be easier to 'get over' if you weren't making it higher."

"What's that even mean? I thought you spent all your riddles on Ranch Hand."

Time exhaled through his nose. This would be a challenge. But then again, he had convinced Mido to swallow a rock that one time, so he figured he could manage this too.


Hyrule never realised the sheer control and grace that bridging space and time must require until he experienced it with neither.

One second he was stepping through the portal, the next he was suspended in a void with infinite versions of himself (all of them screaming), then he was face down in the grass.

"-more clear," Time was saying before he noticed Hyrule's presence. "Ah, Traveller. Join us."

"I think I'll just lie here for a bit," he mumbled into the dirt.

A pair of hands grabbed him by the shoulders and hauled him onto unsteady feet. It was Legend, but when Hyrule smiled in thanks he looked away.

Time gave the both of them a heavy look.

"There's no easy way to start this so I just will. The two of you were always my responsibility," he began.

Hyrule felt a lead weight settle in his gut.

"It was my failure which led to the tragedies of your times; and for that I am so deeply sorry. And yet, despite those hardships, you exist; having grown into the fine young men I see here today. The men that I have had the distinct honour and privilege of fighting alongside and growing to know over these past months. For that I am incredibly grateful.

"While I was close to the others, even in a familial sense with some, you two have always stood out to me. You represented not my failure, but the triumph that came in spite of it. Your mere existence put to bed many of the demons I had been struggling with since I muddied the timeline. So thank you, both of you, for fighting and fixing what I had broken. My only wish is that I could've made it easier for you."

Time looked so, so sad . Hyrule didn't know what to say, but he felt like he might just start crying if he didn't say anything.

Seeing their reactions, the elder Link offered a deprecating smile. "You can probably tell I've been thinking about this for a while."

"Tch, you don't have to give yourself so much credit," Legend finally huffed, his arms crossed. "It wasn't all your fault. Plenty of idiots to blame for that, and you're far from the top of that list."

"Vet…" Time sighed.

"He's right," sniffed Hyrule. "If- If I had a rupee for every d-dumb thing some moron with a drop of power did, I'd almost have enough power to fix it," he offered a slightly watery smile.

"Yeah, I could probably use that money to bribe the knights into doing their jobs for once. Aren't they the worst, 'Rule?"

"The worst!"

"Boys…" Time tried to interject.

"And don't even get me started on the royalty. Zelda's great and all, but she's just one girl in a long line of screwups. Right 'Rule?"

"Y-Yeah. One of my Zeldas was cursed by her own brother."

"See how messed up that is Old Man? And you've got nothing to do with it."

"She was asleep for, like, a really long time too."

"Uh huh."

"And it's weird 'cause she looks just like the other Zelda."

"Alright, thanks for the info 'Rule."

"And I had to kiss her to wake her up."

"'Rule?"

"Yeah?"

"Stop talking."

"Sorry; I talk when I'm nervous."

Time, meanwhile, was watching them with a slowly growing smile that clashed with the aggrieved furrow of his brow.

"Thank you," he said.

Legend put his hands on his hips with a huff.

"I just didn't wanna have to see you all mopey is all. You looked like a kicked dog."

"Heh, I suppose I must've," the old man chuckled.

"And you've got no reason to," Legend continued. "We've all turned out alright, sorta, and you've got a proper normal life to get back to."

"That I do," Time conceded. "And so can you both. You're young; you'll figure something out. Besides, I hear one of you has been smooching princesses."

Hyrule turned a deep red.

"It's not like that!" he blurted. "We're just friends!"

"Mhm. You know, Malon and I are still great friends ourselves."

The blush had reached the pointy tips of his ears.

"Shut up!"

Legend and Time both laughed heartily at his embarrassment.

"Ugh, can't we just leave now?" Hyrule was covering his face.

Unlike its usual grace, a portal appeared with a tremendous banging noise, as if thunder had been bottled up and let out all at once.

The group collectively clapped their hands over their ears in pain.

"Christ Almighty!" Legend exclaimed, leaping back on instinct.

Time performed a truly impressive backflip, but the look in his face said he'd rather not have.

Hyrule jumped maybe three feet in the air before chucking his boomerang at the offending portal.

It flew in without any fanfare, and did not return.

The trio remained on edge, staring. In addition to the disconcerting sound, the gateway was also quite crooked and partially buried in the ground.

"I don't wanna," said Legend, still on edge.

"Yeah, me neither," seconded Hyrule, hand warily raised in anticipation of his lost boomerang.

"Ow," said Time rather belatedly; his cartilage wasn't what it used to be.

This caused Legend to snort in amusement, and gradually the tension was lost.

"Heh, you won't be laughing when you're my age," Time chuckled good naturedly.

"We technically don't even know your age still," noted Hyrule.

"You're right," said Time.

The Downfall Duo waited for him to elaborate.

He did not.

"Right. Anyways, guess we'd better get going. Come on 'Rule."

"Hold on, not without this you're not," Time opened his arms wide.

Legend froze mid-stride.

"Since when did you do hugs?"

"I'm feeling sentimental."

"I'm not hugging you."

"Yes you are."

"No, I'm not."

"Come on, bring it in."

"I'm not bringing anything in."

"Sure you are," Time gestured at Hyrule. "Show him how it's done."

"Right, as if he's gonna just-"

Hyrule walked into the hug.

"Traitor."

"It's not gonna kill ya Vet," said Hyrule, extricating himself.

"That's the problem."

"Fine. We can just have a handshake instead," Time relented with a trustworthy smirk.

Legend crossed his arms.

"I wasn't born yesterday. I know you'll just turn it into a hug or something once I get close enough."

"Technically, you won't be born until a good few decades from now in an alternate reality. Besides, it's either this or I tell Traveller here about our talk from earlier."

Legend went for the handshake.

It did, in fact, turn into a bone crushing hug.

"That's for being such a punk."

"Great. Thanks," gasped Legend.

"You're welcome," Time released him. "Now, get."

With one last sad smile from Hyrule, and an almost believable scowl from Legend, the last two Heroes departed.

Time looked down at the ground, and he didn't cry for the longest time. They had both whispered quiet words of forgiveness to him from within the closeness of the hugs.

"Thank you."


Quite some time had passed since he had returned to his wonderful wife and peaceful ranch (for good, he had promised himself). It was a fine morning, much like any other, when a courier came galloping down the path. Rather, the courier's horse was galloping, but one glance at the man's face told Time (no, just Link now) that the man would be doing such without the horse.

By the time Link had warily left his seat on the porch, the man was leaping off his horse and rushing up to him. The shiny bangles and epaulettes he wore marked him as a representative of the Royal Family (and partially blinded Link).

The courier cleared his throat while unfurling a scroll, presumably to read off of.

"Ser Link Lon of Heroic Repute; Her Royal Majesty the Queen Zelda of the Lands of Hyrule, Wisdom Blessed, of the Goddess Blood, Makes Official Her Request Petitioning Your Aid. What Say You?"

Link blinked slowly, trying not only to process the quick speech, but also how he somehow spoke each letter with capitalization.

"What Say You?" repeated the man.

"I'm always happy to help the Queen. I don't suppose you-"

"Her Royal Majesty the Queen Zelda of the Lands of Hyrule, Wisdom Blessed, of the Goddess Blood, Wishes to Extend Her Feelings of Pride and Fulfilment in You and Your Heroism. She Also Requests Your Assistance in Navigation. As Such, By the Interpretation of the Cartographers Guild, I Have Been Entrusted With Entrusting You With This Map," he had barely finished speaking before handing the opened scroll to a nonplussed Link.

The scroll was only a map. There were no words. Why had he-? How had he-?

"Now I Must Bid You Farewell, Ser Link Lon," and with that, as quickly as the pompous courier had burst in, he was already disappearing down the road.

"Link, hun?" called Malon from within the house. "Who was that?"

"A messenger from Zelda," he absentmindedly replied, studying the map. Was this the Lost Woods?

"Was it?" Malon had walked up behind him now. "What did she have to say?"

Link rolled the scroll back up with a huff.

"Looks like I'm needed for one last quest."

Malon was aghast.

"So soon? But hun, you just got back after, well, goddesses know how long!" she moved to hug him from behind while Link remained staring out to the horizon.

"Besides, there's the little one now, and I'll need you here on the farm," at this Link broke off his staring contest with Nothing, choosing instead to look back at his wife with love.

The two had realised Malon was pregnant only a few days ago, much to their utter delight and joy. Thinking of their child reminded Link of his boys, particularly the rancher. He couldn't wait to meet him.

"Yes, there's that," Link remarked with a smile, the setting sun casting a red glow on his face. "But I'm afraid duty calls. It'll only be a few days."

Before Malon could protest again, he put his hands up in mock surrender. "I promised you no more adventures, and I meant it. But Zelda wouldn't have sent this to me if it weren't deathly important. I'm sure I'm the only one who can handle this safely."

"She could have come herself," Malon muttered.

Link finally turned to regard her.

"You're being fastidious. You only do that when you know I'm right."

Malon scrunched up her face. "Fastidious? Since when did you use such fancy language?"

Link turned back to look out into the twilight, a sense of melancholy descending. "Since I had to be the grown up amongst children. Again."

His wife hummed softly in bittersweet amusement.

"They sure were something…" Malon trailed off. She looked away, conflicted. "I take it you've made up your mind already?"

He nodded.

"Ever the Hero, my fairy boy."

"Malon dear, this'll be the last one. I swear. Unless the moon actually comes crashing down, I won't leave you, nor our child," he chuckled. "And if Her Majesty doesn't get that? Well, she can stuff it."

The two laughed, more out of a distraction from foreboding than out of any real mirth.

Malon firmly turned Link towards her, looking him in his good eye.

"You'd best come back now. I won't tolerate no deadbeat dad for my daughter."

"Daughter?" he questioned, amused.

"Mothers intuition," was the confident reply.

"Well, our son won't have to worry about it; I'll come back just fine, I always do," Link turned to walk off the porch before Malon grabbed his arm.

"You're leaving now? It's just about nighttime!"

"I know my way around."

"Don't you remember what happened the last time you went into the Lost Woods at night? Oh don't you give me that look, of course I saw the map. You still don't have a fairy!"

"I've been all around the world now, and also, this time I have something to come back to."

"Oh you-! Fine. But you best wait there, I have something for you," Malon disappeared into the house. "And you bet I know you rolled your eye just now. And how you're mimicking me now. Very mature fairy boy, so much for being the grown up."

After being incredibly sure that his wife was well and truly out of earshot, Link muttered to himself: "S'not like the bar was very high…"

He didn't have much longer to sulk ( wait patiently , thank you very much. Adults didn't sulk (or so he figured, no one ever actually told him how adults were supposed to act)) before Malon came back outside, arms full of gleaming metal gear.

"Since you were too busy playing grown up to bother, I took it upon myself to fetch you some upgrades for your gear. Either you go with these or you don't go at all, mister," she thrusted the assorted items into Link's suddenly very full hands.

"Is that a-"

"Helmet? Yes it is. I don't know how you haven't had your head cracked open yet, and when did you stop using a shield anyway?"

Link started adding the modifications to his armour as his wife paced back and forth in anxious fretfulness. He had planned to use the spare set he kept by the horses (never too prepared), but his usual armour did feel nicer to wear, and the add-ons were marked improvements, even if he hated how much the helmet obscured his already limited vision.

After recruiting Malon in the fight against some particularly fiddly straps, he was all kitted out (and felt about 100 pounds heavier).

"Now there's my handsome and prepared husband."

He winked at her (of course, it was fairly indistinguishable from a blink, but she had been married to this idiot for long enough to tell the difference), and after a kiss for the road (and being very careful to mind the helmet (and his nose)), Link, the Hero of Time, rode off quite literally into the sunset.

They never found his body.