Disclaimers: Naruto isn't mine. This is purely a fanfic using someone else's characters.
Warnings: This story includes strong language, violence, angst, references to suicide/ suicide attempts, sexual content (yaoi of course), & referenced/ depicted child abuse.
For Whom the Bell Tolls
Chapter 11: A Different Tune
"Courage isn't the strength to go on- it is going on when you don't have the strength."
-Napoleon Bonaparte
- - -
Naruto glanced between the two, trying to connect the dots. Because it was blatantly obvious that there were dots to connect. Iruka looked bewildered and his face was reddening with what seemed to be layers of embarrassment, and Kakashi was far too amused for someone opening his door to a student and his guardian.
Iruka-san said he was going to be staying with a friend, but what friend? We just moved here. And how could Kakashi-sensei possibly know him?
It clicked.
"Woah- wait. Are you the friend that Iruka-san is staying with?"
"I am."
Naruto stared over at the brunette. "Why didn't you say the friend was Sasuke's.. what even are you?"
"Naruto!"
"It's fine, Iruka-chan" Kakashi replied, eyes still twinkling with the entertainment of it all. "I'm Sasuke's guardian, Naruto. Much like Iruka is yours."
The blonde looked up at him in surprise. He didn't know that Sasuke was adopted too. Though, if he had put much thought to it, he would have realized there was something strange about his family situation. He called him Kakashi, so he knew it wasn't his dad.
I was so caught up in my own stuff that I never even thought to ask about it.
He felt.. ashamed. He wanted to know more about Sasuke, wanted him to open up about himself, and yet missed a very obvious question.
"I didn't know.."
Kakashi waved it off. "Don't worry about it, Naruto. Sasuke is a very private person. In fact, I think you might be the only one who does know."
"Hmm..."
"Speaking of, why don't you head upstairs and find him. He should be finishing up."
The blonde gave his guardian and his teacher another curious look before stepping inside and bounding up the stairs. Let's see if Sasuke knows anything about this.
Meanwhile, Iruka couldn't get the redness in his cheeks to fade. As soon as his adoptive son was out of earshot, he turned to his boyfriend- eyes burning with frustration and embarrassment. "Kakashi! What the hell? Why didn't you tell me that Sasuke's your son?!"
He shrugged. "It never came up."
"You're impossible."
A mischievous fox-grin adorned Kakashi's face, "and yet you can't get enough of me."
Iruka shook his head and pushed past him. "So, are you going to give me a tour?"
"You sure you don't want to wait until you go to your friend's house?"
"Ha ha, very funny."
The silver fox stepped up close behind him and wrapped a lean arm around his waist, pulling him close. Iruka bit his lip hard at the contact, finding pleasure in the warmth he could feel radiating off him. "Kakashi" he breathed, "we can't.. mnnhnn.." He struggled to hold back a moan as his boyfriend licked his way up his neck.
Kakashi grasped his ear with his teeth and Iruka shivered against him. "I can't help myself" he murmured, "not when you look so.. delectable.."
Iruka gave a breathy laugh. "Delectable..? You've been reading too many of those- ahhhh.."
Iruka could feel Kakashi's want throbbing against him, and it made his brain fuzzy. Desire swirled in his gut and rose in the back of his throat, making him feel parched and yet his mouth watered as he thought about what else Kakashi could be doing with those hands, his tongue, his…
The silver fox suddenly spun him around. "Ka-" His mouth descended on him and Iruka rose to meet it. He could feel Kakashi smirk against his lips before completely ravishing him, devouring him- their embrace aggressive and hungry. Kakashi's hand wrapped around the back of his neck as he deepened the kiss, while an arm snaked around his waist, pulling his brunette close.
Iruka leaned into him, desperate for more. He parted his lips and Kakashi's tongue shoved its way inside, exploring the tight wet cavern. Iruka's head was spinning- he couldn't breathe, couldn't think, all he could do was feel. The hands on his body, rough and gentle all at once. Soft firm lips moving against him, a hard length rubbing against his core. His senses were consumed by everything that was Kakashi.
It was intoxicating.
Kakashi stepped forward, forcing Iruka back. He stumbled along with him, further into the house, until his back collided with the wall. It seemed to reawaken his sense of reality, his awareness of what he was doing. He put his hand against his boyfriend's chest, pushing him back. "Ahhh- Ka.. Kakashi.. wait."
Kakashi licked around his lobe and ground his length against him. "I'm not ready to stop" he whispered in his ear, his breath husky and thick with want. Iruka could feel it slid down his neck and curl in his toes.
"I want you, Iruka."
The brunette pushed his hands harder against his chest, forcing him back. "I.. I know. Just- let's just wait until I drop them off, ok? When I come back we.." he blushed, "we can.. keep going."
A low growl slipped from Kakashi's lips. "How can I stop when you look at me like that."
"Kakashi-"
"Finally!" Naruto's voice pierced the air, startling them. "Christ- done so soon, Sasuke?" he quipped, his voice heavy with sarcasm. "Sure you don't want to pack anything else?"
"Wow. I didn't realize you were so anxious to get me alone with you, Naruto?"
They could hear the blonde stumble as he choked on his own spit.
"Don't worry, Naruto. It'll be just the two of us very, very soon."
As they descended the stairs, their guardians quickly stepped away from eachother, straightening their clothes and adjusting their pulsing erections. Just before the two teens got to the landing, Iruka rose up on his toes and kissed Kakashi lightly on the cheek. They exchanged smiles filled with barely contained lust and candid affection- far from the "friends" they had portrayed themselves as.
Sasuke stepped around the corner in time to see it, while Naruto missed it entirely. Though, as soon as Naruto has filled him in on everything, Sasuke already had a pretty good guess as to what was going on between his guardian and Naruto's. It was a bizarre coincidence, but truth was often stranger than fiction. Especially in a small town.
Iruka cleared his throat as he refocused on the teens. "Alright then, are you two ready?"
"Yes."
"No."
The two exchanged a look, while Kakashi and Iruka did the same. All four were quite curious about how the next few days would turn out. While Naruto was still feeling rather hesitant about the whole thing, three of the four were quite sure that he would be singing a different tune by the end of it.
- - -
Iruka made his appearance extremely brief when they got back to their place. He packed quickly, threw down a wad of cash for them to get some food or whatever else they might need, then headed towards the door.
"Are you already leaving?" Naruto asked, concern evident in his voice. "Why're you in such a hurry?"
An image of Kakashi shoving him down on the bed before lowering himself on top of him forced its way into Iruka's mind, and the urgency to leave grew. "Sorry, Naruto. I've gotta go. You two have fun. Call me if you need anything." Then he rushed out, slamming the door shut behind him in his haste.
The two stared after him, surprised.
"Must have been important.." Naruto thought aloud. "Wonder what Kakashi wants to do that would make him be in such a hurry.."
Sasuke had a strong suspicion he knew exactly what those two had planned for the night. It would make any man frantically rush around to leave. Hell, Sasuke wanted nothing more than to have the same plans with Naruto- though the possibility of that happening was beyond far-fetched.
He decided to save the blonde from the images that kept assaulting his mind. "They probably have a movie they're going to see."
"Ohh! Yeah- that makes sense." Naruto turned to face the raven, "hey, maybe we should do that! I haven't been to the movies in forever!"
Sasuke's eyes flickered over that familiar face, trying not to let his past and his heart consume him. "Yeah.. I haven't either. Tomorrow after school sound ok?"
"That works for me" he said with a grin, "and now we have cash for popcorn."
"Great. Then it's a date."
Naruto's smile faltered. "Sasuke.."
"It's an expression, Naruto."
The blonde didn't look convinced but decided to drop it for now. He suddenly felt uneasy and extremely aware that it was just the two of them. In his home. Alone. At night.
"Are you hungry?" Sasuke asked, interrupting his anxious thoughts.
"Always."
"Ok, how about you wash up and I order us some food."
The blonde nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, ok."
He walked upstairs in a daze, grabbed a clean towel from the closet, and headed to the bathroom, closing the door behind him. He turned on the shower and turned to look at the door as the water heated up. The lock was broken, had been since they moved in. Never was a problem before- a closed door meant it was in use. Iruka and Naruto each respected that.
But would Sasuke..?
"I really fucking hope so."
When the water temperature was comfortable, Naruto switched it to the tub faucet to start a bath. He couldn't get the cast around his wrist wet, and this would be the easiest way to do that. He turned and knelt down, opening the cabinet beneath the sink. He grabbed a plastic grocery bag from inside and, using his one good hand and his teeth, managed to tie it around his wrist. Satisfied with how it turned out, he clumsily stripped and lowered himself into the tub.
A sigh escaped his lips without his permission. It was terribly cliché, but it felt amazing, soothing. His tired bruised body needed this. He took slow deep breaths and closed his eyes, sinking deeper and deeper…
A knock at the door startled him awake.
"Naruto? Hey, are you ok?"
Sasuke could hear water splashing around, like he had just startled the hell out of him. "Uh- yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. I just.. fell asleep for a minute."
Something tight clenched in Sasuke's chest. "You did what?!" He grabbed the door handle and was surprised to find it unlocked. Without much warning, he threw open the door.
"Sasuke! What the hell?!" Naruto quickly grabbed his towel and threw it over his lower half, pressing down into the bath with him. "You can't just barge in here!!" he screamed.
Ignoring the blonde's frantic declarations, Sasuke walked over to him and dropped to his knees next to the tub. His eyes were only focused on his face. He raised a hand and gently pressed it against his forehead. "Are you dizzy?" he asked softly. "Do you have a fever?"
Naruto stared at him incredulously. "What is going on with you? I'm not sick- I was just tired. And I'm in the fucking tub, so get out!"
Sasuke's smooth, cold fingers slid from his face to his hair. "You didn't wash your hair yet." He looked down, meeting his bright cerulean gaze. "Let me help you."
"Absolutely not."
"You have a towel on. It's not a big deal."
Naruto eyed him warily. This was probably a terrible idea, but truthfully he wasn't sure he could do it with one hand. "Ughhh.. fine. But don't even think about trying anything."
Sasuke ignored the comment and filled his hands with shampoo. "I need you to lie back."
Naruto hesitated, but finally gave in and started to lower himself down. Sasuke kept a firm hand on his back to help him, then carefully slid it out from under him once he was in place. He tried not to think about the feel of Naruto's smooth bare skin beneath his palm, about how much he looked like someone else- even with his clothes off..
He chided himself for the thought and refocused on the task at hand. He promised Naruto he wouldn't attack him. He needed to keep his mind locked in the present, and his body under control.
Don't ruin this. Don't ruin what you have with him, he told himself.
Don't hurt anyone else.
He lathered the soap in the blonde's hair and massaged his scalp, sinking into the feel of him.
"Mmmnn.. that actually feels really good.." Naruto breathed, not thinking about how it could be misconstrued, not considering how his words and the way he said it flared up every nerve-ending in Sasuke's body. Not realizing that it was taking everything in Sasuke not to go into that tub with him.
The Uchiha gritted his teeth together, then helped the blonde sit up so he could apply conditioner. Naruto checked on the status of his towel repeatedly, making sure that the raven wasn't able to see anything more than he already did. He was surprised that Sasuke hadn't tried anything. I mean, here he was- completely naked, vulnerable… it wouldn't take much for his hands to linger, to dip lower.
He was relieved that Sasuke suddenly had so much self-control, and yet he felt..
Wait, wait- do I want him to..?
No, he thought firmly. I was freaked out when he kissed me. Why would I want him to do more?
Naruto forced back the images that started to flood his mind. No. I'm not- I'm not like that. I'm probably just horny or something. Teenage hormones- that's all this is.
Sasuke's fingertips gently trailed across Naruto's collarbone, and he flinched. Sasuke's hand froze, but he didn't move it away. "What is this from?" he asked.
Naruto was confused at first, then he realized what he'd seen. A scar, sliced just below his collarbone.
"The one's on my face aren't the only scars I got from her…" he said quietly.
Sasuke assumed as much, but it still hurt to hear it. What the hell did that woman do to him?
"Think you can tell me..?" he asked.
Naruto bit down on his lip, flinching when he hit his cut.
"Stop doing that" Sasuke said. He gently grasped his chin, and turned his face so he could get a better look. He ran his thumb just beneath the cut, just beneath his lip. "I don't like seeing you hurt."
Naruto wanted Sasuke to see him and only him, but he wasn't sure he did. It made words of endearment like that far less comforting. He tried to pull his face away, but Sasuke's grip tightened- not painfully, but just enough to keep him there.
"What happened, Naruto?"
Large cerulean eyes filled with pain. "It's better if you don't know."
Dark eyes narrowed. "And why is that?"
Naruto pushed his hand away and dropped his gaze. "I don't want you to picture me like that."
"Like what?"
Naruto growled, frustration tearing through him. He jerked his head up to glare at the raven. "Weak, Sasuke- alright?! I don't want you to picture me as some weak, pathetic little victim. I hate it- I fucking hate it!"
His voice cracked, but he pushed down the tears with a new rush of anger. He opened his mouth, prepared to continue in his ranting, but Sasuke beat him to it.
"You're not weak or pathetic, Naruto. You were a fucking kid- the only option you had was to try and survive." Sasuke buried his hand in his hair and pulled him close, forcing their eyes to meet.
"Naruto. Don't let her keep doing this to you. You didn't do anything wrong. You have nothing to hide. She is the only one who should feel ashamed."
A tear slipped free from its watery blue prison and trickled down his scarred cheek before settling into the span of water below. "I don't want you to look at me different."
"I won't."
"It was.. before she cut my face" Naruto said, his voice shaky. He never talked about these things. Ever. It was hard to hear it out loud- even from himself. "She walked past me when I was looking in the mirror in the bathroom. She.. freaked out when she saw my reflection."
He looked down at his towel-covered lap. "She.. umm.. she grabbed the back of my head and slammed me into the mirror.."
Sasuke flinched. "Fuck.."
"She didn't stop.." Naruto choked. "When the mirror completely shattered she finally let go. I thought she was done, but.." he swallowed. "She grabbed a piece of glass. She tried to get my face, but I scooted away and she.. missed. Well, she sort of missed."
He fingered the scar along his collarbone, brushing his hand against Sasuke's. "I was relieved she didn't cut my face, but.. I guess that didn't last for very long.."
Sasuke could feel tears welling in his chest and filling his dark, pained eyes. He didn't know what he could do for him, how he could help him, but he wanted to. He desperately wanted to take the pain away from him- in fact, he would happily make it his own if he could.
"I.. I wish I could take all of this pain from you.." he said, unsure of what he wanted to say until it was already falling out of his mouth. "I hate that you had to go through this."
Naruto rubbed his hands against his eyes. "Yeah.. me too."
"Please don't be mad at me for this."
Naruto looked up and Sasuke wrapped his arms around him and pulled him up and against his chest, the rim of the tub the only thing separating them. Naruto gasped in surprise, and was about to pull away from him, when Sasuke buried his face against his neck and his hand in his hair. "I'm so sorry, Naruto."
He could feel an arm wrap around his waist, but he didn't shy away from it. This time, he leaned into it. He wanted to be comforted- to be seen and cared for. He's wanted it for so long. And while Iruka was a wonderful guardian, it.. it wasn't like this.
It had never been like this for Naruto.
So, he sank into Sasuke's embrace, wrapping his arms around him, gripping his shirt for dear life- as if the only thing keeping him from drowning, from being pulled into the dark depths of his mind..
was Sasuke.
