Hello, to any and all who may still be hoping I would continue this story. I know it's been over a year, but this chapter simply didn't… flow! After all this time I realised I am probably the worst liaison chapter writer n the history of fanfiction, so I just bit the bullet and wrote… something. To move the story along and get to the parts I DO have written, already. I may come back to this in the next few days and edit; I may also not bother. Just be aware that the chapter's here to move the story along and does exactly what is says on the tin – no more, no less.
Hopefully I'll manage to pop out a few more chapters on the days to come.
For those still out there, thank you for that and I guarantee: I have no intention of NOT finishing this, however long it may take.
Thanks.
After talking with Grace and Charlie and letting them know that he may be going away for an unknown amount of time, Danny finds Steve fishing his keys out of a bowl at the door.
"Hey, buddy, where are you going?"
"I ended up calling Brenner," Steve says, visibly tired.
"Brenner?" Danny asks, mildly confused. "Who's that?"
"Don't you remember him? Manager of computer systems for the NSA at Sillex Labs? The guy who came to us and spilled the beans about deep cover operatives' covers being blown, Catherine's included?"
"Oh, yes, I remember. Good call."
"I'm grasping at straws, Danny, but he agreed to meet, in 15 minutes, in front of the palace. I have to go."
Danny grabs his jacket, draped over the back of the leather recliner. "Well, lead the way, Steve."
Caught off guard, Steve stares. "You really don't need to come with me, Danny, I'm just information gathering."
"Steve, I'm getting fidgety anyway, so I'm not letting you out of my sight. Like I said, lead the way."
Steve sighs, defeated, unwilling to fight Danny and opens the door wider, moving towards his truck.
Steve seems slightly more upbeat at Brenner's promise that he will do everything in his power to dig up news. On the way back from the palace, desperate for any idea as to what else he can do and who else he can pump for information, he remembers an obvious, if not difficult possibility. He decides to call Captain Hamilton directly and ask for his help, cautioning him not to disclose how much (or how little) of all this information they know, to the CIA. Lou is now too curious to be able to contain himself.
"So? Any news?"
Steve sighs. "Not as such, no, but I hope that soon, something will come up. It's just the wait that's killing me."
Lou looks him deep in the eye with a confidence he certainly doesn't feel. "Steve, we WILL find her and bring her home. You need to believe that."
He fixes his stare on Lou, heart warmed at his certainty. "Thanks, Lou, I do. But it's always easier to believe in something when a lot of other people around you also believe in it. So, for that I thank you, from the bottom of my heart."
"Anytime, man, anytime. That's what we're here for." They hug it out like men.
When Danny comes in from the lanai and asks Lou what he thinks about the whole situation, the big man sighs and it's written all over his face. "Steve's in survival mode, you know… he won't listen to you, he won't do as you tell him to, he can't think, right now. He's on auto pilot. The only woman he has ever really loved is missing, presumed dead, in the hands of fanatical terrorists were responsible for the deaths of several people here, on O'ahu, his home turf. It's like a personal taunt. Worse, what if he kidnapped Catherine because she's the love of Steve's life and he somehow caught on that? We have to assume that they gather intel, same as we do. And that guy…" Lou huffs, bitter. "It's right up his alley to do something like this."
Danny ponders Lou's words for the rest of the day.
An hour later, Doris has some, if limited news from her friend in the Agency; no body has been found, but that constitutes little comfort – it's not as though the Taliban would return an American body for burial. She also confirms that Catherine's last mission was in Afghanistan, and her last known location, Shindand. An alarming thought occurs to Steve – what if Catherine returned to find out more or to try and capture the terrorists responsible for the bombings? After all, she'd accompanied him to retrieve Freddy's body out of the kindness of her heart… his heart constricts, and he prays that this won't be another retrieval mission.
After Junior and Tani leave, to prepare all their gear for a probable op, Doris offers to cook some food in order to leave the two friends alone. Thanking her inwardly, Danny accepts her offer and comes over to Steve, coaxing him to sit down on the couch and talk.
"How are you?"
The sad look on Steve's face mirrors the despair Danny knows he's trying to stamp down. Desperately. "How do you think I am, Danny? It's Cath…"
Danny smiles sadly at the moniker his friend reserves for his ex-girlfriend. He's always known she had a dangerous job, but the possibility of what just happened was always an abstract, distant possibility. To have it so violently brought to reality is shaking him to the core, rocking his foundations.
"I'm going to go get her, Danny, even if it's the last thing I do."
Danny nods. "I know buddy, I know. And we're all here for you and Cath. Whatever you need. But Steve, what if, God forbid, we never get any confirmation?"
Despondent, Steve looks down at his feet, a long breath leaving him. "In that case, I'm going to Afghanistan. It's her last known location and I may be able to find locals who heard, saw or know something. What I can't do is stay put, running myself ragged, walking in circles, waiting. I'm not a patient man, Danny, and I'll be damned if I hesitate in this instance. My hesitation may mean the difference between life and death, and I would never be able to live with that on my conscience."
"And you won't, Steve, you won't, we're all here to help. We wouldn't dream of letting you go alone."
Steve shakes his head, sad. "Danny, in all conscience, I can't let you come. You have a daughter and a son, and I have no idea how dangerous this op is going to be. Point of fact, I can't ask any of you to come with me. I have no idea what I'm going to find or even if I will make it back alive, with or without Catherine."
Danny smiles encouragingly. "And that's exactly why you need a team, exactly why we're coming with. It's the job, Steve, come on, don't fight me on this. I'd never be able to live with myself if I knew that because of my cowardice, you'd stayed behind, in Afghanistan, or you had come back, but been unable to save Catherine. Come on! Despite all my yapping and complaints, I know what she means to you, if I won't help you rescue her, who will I help you rescue? Even if she didn't mean what she does, she's still Ohana and we don't leave them behind. Besides, I'm pretty sure that if the situation were reversed, she'd be gearing up to go save my sorry arse from those nut cases," Danny says, huffing amusedly. He briefly considers opening up to him about what he told Cath in Montana but decides against it. Now is definitely NOT the time for another roller coaster of emotions and recriminations he knows he deserves. Now, they need to be as united as they've ever been, and he knows Steve would severely resent him for what he did.
Said friend gapes at him, frankly surprised. Danny never ceases to amaze him, and the man's loyalty is a beautiful thing to behold. Not to mention his friendship, unyielding, steady as a rock, albeit mocking and annoying at times. Musing over the significance of life and support systems, he guesses he's one of the luckiest sods in the whole world, with genuine friends to call his own and even a mother who seems to have sensed the precise moment he needed her the most and popped out of hiding to come be another of his steady rocks. He tilts his body forward, extending a hand towards Danny's.
"Thank you Danny, you have no idea how important your words are." He's getting emotional, so fewer words are better than tears.
"I know, buddy. And I'm not just saying them, I mean every single one. We're all here for you and we'll do everything we can to bring Catherine back home safe and sound."
Danny decides to call Harry who, despite no longer being in service, still has many contacts within the MI6. The former spy's reaction is surprise with a hint of sadness, nostalgia wrapped in weariness. He disconnects the call and promises Danny to do all he can to help them.
After all the feelers have been sent out and all the preparations are complete, Steve goes to the Governor and tells him that he won't be able to focus on his work until he's returned to Afghanistan and tried to rescue Lieutenant Rollins. The governor, knowing that he'll resign if he's not allowed to go, asks him if he needs anything from him and requests to be informed of their progress.
The wait becomes unbearable; like a man on the gallows with a rope around his neck, walking the plank is almost worse than being dropped in the ocean.
Eventually, Captain Hamilton gets back to Steve with the news they were all waiting for and suddenly, the op is a go.
Four hours later, the whole team, minus Lou (aided by a willing Jerry), who stays behind to hold down the Fort, is en route to Afghanistan. The memories from his last trip gnaw at Steve and the irony of how differently he feels, this time, doesn't escape him. He feels... unhinged, desperate, hopeless. Rationally, he knows he needs to keep these emotions at bay if he's to be at all useful to her. But deep down inside... getting a grip is proving very hard to do.
The tense atmosphere could almost be cut with a knife. The team all know this will be an extremely dangerous op and that sobering reminder makes sure they spend most of the trip slumbering in their seats or in muted, ominous talks with each other, striving to preserve Steve's ears from the realities of probabilities.
By the time they reach Shindand, Harry is waiting for them. Steve really can't put into words how comforting and reassuring his presence is, and how thankful he is that he decided to come of his own volition; he makes a mental note to eventually thank him, once all of this is over.
Captain Hamilton is also waiting for him, having managed to arrange a meeting between Steve and the village elder who had warned him about the terrorists' capabilities. He dispatches a small team of soldiers and an armoured vehicle to town, telling Steve to be swift about it and return before dark. The rest of 5-0 and Doris are given temporary quarters in an out-of-the way decommissioned building, and they quickly get to preparing for an extraction op, praying that's exactly what they're doing there.
Doris hears some more from her contact in the agency – they probably know where Catherine was taken, but the efforts being undertaken to rescue her are feeble, at best. The CIA really dislikes having their ops and failures brought to light, so they're probably trying to sort the matter out without any blame falling on them. The usual. Nothing new, Steve thinks with a huff of anger, when he eventually gets back.
As for her family… Elizabeth Rollins hasn't called him yet, which basically means… they probably don't know, and he much prefers to keep them in the dark, at least for now, while they know so little. Her father would throw a monumental fit that would help no one, and for nothing, as the CIA is not accustomed to giving out information about operatives, assets or ops to concerned family.
His last thought is of Joe and a strong pang of grief, coupled with tingling all over his abdomen strikes him, reminding him that he's no longer an option to turn to. Begrudgingly, he puts thoughts of his second father to the back of his mind, since now is the time to worry about the living. And she has to be alive.
In Khayfan, struggling with his broken dialect, and with the help of one of the Navy personnel who accompanied him, Steve struggles to hide his frustration at the slow trickle of information he's able to obtain from the man before him. Eventually, he gets the confirmation he was hoping for; Catherine was indeed seen in town, around 4 months ago, and the Elder did hear rumours of an American female captured by the Taliban. He has no idea where she is, but if he had to guess, especially if she's the female who had accompanied him earlier, he'd wager a guess that she is beyond 'Infidel's pass', in the hands of the Taliban. He further tells Steve that they have some sort of compound, there, because rumour abounds in the small town, but nothing more. Living in this part of the world is hard enough without kicking, prodding or provoking dangerous men, so nobody asks questions. People live their lives ignoring what happens around them, concerned with their own survival and that of their families. Resistance is futile, anyway; it's not like the Taliban have any respect for human rights or human life, and their general response to any sort of defiance, from the villagers, is a bullet right in the middle of their foreheads.
Harbouring more hope than he has for the past five days, Steve thanks the man profusely and wholeheartedly promises him to kill any Taliban that he comes across; the vehemence of his words startles the man, who cautions him to not engage in battles that he not only can't win, but that will also bring him no benefit whatsoever. Steve has a mind to object to the "benefit" part but keeps quiet out of respect and a lack of enough knowledge of the language to be as articulate as he'd like.
But mulling on the Elder's words, he realises he's absolutely right; his mission is to rescue Catherine, so he must make sure to find her, retrieve her and leave, ideally without anyone being the wiser. Once he has her in his grasp, safe and away from danger, then he can process his emotions and calmly decide what to do, revenge or retreat. Now is not the time for that. They say their goodbyes, and Steve thanks him for his words of wisdom.
By the time they return to the base, night has fallen and the team, plus Doris, are all uneasy about Steve's whereabouts. He thanks the Navy detachment who accompanied him and bids them goodnight, a sparkle of hope blooming in his chest at the Intel he's been able to gather, mentally thanking the Elder for all his help. He will never know how precious his words are and how seriously Steve took them to heart.
His sleep is heavy, laden with nightmares, making him break out in sweaty shivers that wake him to nurse the deep, dark night. Giving up any hope of sleep, Steve contemplates the difficult task ahead of them, in an unknown corner of the world and a harsh, unforgiving terrain. Indeed, the advantage is all on the enemy's side and he must account for that in their plans of attack. Should they all go in, guns blazing? Or should it just be a couple of them, stealth and hopefully undetected? Should they scope out the place previously, and then make a plan of attack? Or will this famous pass make it impossible to strategize in this manner? Worse, what if they do manage to find Catherine and she's hurt? How will they get her out of there, with the Taliban on their tails? It's not as though Steve has any qualms about murdering any of them; in fact, if Al-Nazri is amongst them, they'll be able to kill two birds with one stone. Wouldn't that be a desirable outcome! Or even if they simply flee the scene, with their tails between their legs, that's also fine by Steve. He's here to find and rescue Catherine, to take her to safety, that's his primary goal. He lies awake the rest of the night, agonising over choices and possibilities.
The sharp chortle of a rooster drifts through the air, breaking the quiet of dawn. A navy team awaits outside to lead them beyond the pass, after a meeting with Captain Hamilton the day before, at their accommodations, had agreed on that course of action. They set out for the 5-hour drive and try to make themselves as comfortable as possible, in a combat vehicle and the apprehension that's visible across all their faces. No one is in a talking mood; if fact, most try to pretend they've gone back to sleep to be able to process emotions and fears more adequately. Steve is as alert as ever, engaging in necessary conversation with the Navy men accompanying them. They know the terrain, the customs and he gets valuable information on local gossip that Captain Hamilton would never know to share.
The CIA hasn't been active in the last few months, they tell him; in fact, they seem to be walking around with their tails between their legs, hugging corridors and making themselves scarce, ever more secretive and stealth. This confirmation sets Steve's blood boiling again; he knew he hated the Agency, but now that it's personal, his hatred takes on a sharper edge, more refined, piercing, ready to strike and fell that tree. But he puts those thought to the back of his mind with great difficulty, vying to focus on the task at hand, but never relenting on the promise to deal with that issue later, not letting it go altogether.
The 5-0 team is on edge, he can feel it; even Doris has a dogged look on her face he's never seen, before and Harry is unusually quiet. But it's too late to make alternative plans, now, so Steve just leans back against the seat and closes his eyes, dreading what he suspects they'll find, but wanting some definition, all the same. This… uncertainty, not knowing if she's even here… is killing him. He needs to know.
They trudge on, in deafening silence, the only sounds the wheels of their transport vehicle crushing the gravel on the dirt road that is taking them closer to where he thinks his life will finally change forever.
