The first thing Apollo heard was a series of repeated clicks, like a timebomb that was approaching going off. He jolted awake.
'Did I oversleep? I'm late!' he panicked; this wasn't how his alarm usually sounded. The clicks stopped, and light stung his eyes.
Instead of a bedroom, his eyes adjusted to a sky draped with thick and puffy clouds, the view obstructed by various tree branches extending from trees around him. He felt numb - number than numb - a strange sensation of absolute nothingness. He couldn't feel his arms, legs, or even his own head.
Apollo was on the ground, face up, scanning his mind for any memories.
'Wait, "scanning"? That doesn't sound right.'
Apollo surveyed the surroundings. His focus moved in straight lines, and he swore he could hear a little creak every time he moved his eyes. Trees spread out in all directions. He struggled to look down, but he could still make out the fact that he was on a hill. Maybe a cliff, he couldn't tell. Through the clicks and creaks, Apollo could still hear the sound of nature: wind blowing, water falling, leaves swaying.
Eventually, he did manage to look down, but he saw nothing — no legs, no torso, nothing.
"Hello?! Where am I?! Why can't I feel anything?! If this is a prank, you better get out here before I beat your ass!" he shouted, unable to feel any part of his mouth moving. He prayed for a response but expected none. However, instead of nothingness, his mind paused as he processed his questions.
'This location resembles a rainforest, possibly Khaosok in Thailand, based on the high humidity and dense waterfalls. However, some key characteristics are inconsistent. Further investigation is recommended.' The voice paused for just long enough to let Apollo realize it was his own.
'There are two possibilities as to why you cannot feel anything. They will be listed from least likely to most likely. The first possibility is that you cannot feel anything because you do not have limbs. The second possibility is that someone sneakily applied anesthesia while you were asleep. Lastly, the third and most likely possibility is that you are a Porygon. The last possibility is the most likely because you are a Porygon. The first and second possibilities are both equally unlikely because Porygons are immune to anesthesia and also have limbs. I hope this answers your questions!'
As soon as the voice finished, Apollo was free to think again and reflect on what the fuck just happened. The voice he heard was his own, answering his own question independently of him. It didn't make any sense.
"Who are you?! If I have limbs, where are they?! Why can't I move? Tell me, you stupid shit!" he shouted again, hoping for– no– demanding answers. Luckily for him, his demands were answered — by himself again.
' I am the Best Index Non-internet Googler; you can call me BING for short. I come pre-installed with all Porygon models, including yours. ...I am unsure of what you are asking. Your limbs are directly below you, as they always have been. The most likely reason that you could not see your limbs earlier was because of the structural nature of Porygon. Your Porygon model is concave, meaning that your "chest" was just barely out of sight. ...You cannot move because you are in sleep mode. This is also the most likely reason you could not look down fully to see yourself. To exit sleep mode, just say "Power on!".'
After listening to the voice, he reluctantly did as he was told.
"Power on!" he groaned, and his vision immediately filled with lights. They were unfocused at first, but from the blue, a user interface began to shine through. It displayed an overwhelming amount of information about his surroundings- Pie charts, entity counters, Apple price estimates - all of it was meaningless noise, moving before his eyes thousands of times per second.
Despite it all, none of it stood out quite as much as one notification in particular. A notification that started off small, but started to grow until it stood in front of everything else.
'INCOMING CALL FROM GOD'
It was imposing, almost threatening him to answer.
"BING, answer the call for me," he spoke, and his words became BING's command.
'Answering call. Please hold.'
"I'll never get used to being answered by myself," he mumbled under his breath, just before the call started.
"Hey, buddy! Looks like you're awake! Do you have any idea who you're talking to?" The voice on the other end was a blend of light and stern, masculine and feminine, long and quick - a voice that was impossible to make - impossible to make to everyone except a God.
"Uh, God?" Apollo stammered back.
"Good, good. That means you know what I need you to know." The voice spoke with an unsettlingly suspicious tone that Apollo didn't dare question.
"I don't think I do," he replied, but quickly backpedaled, realizing his words might have sounded too questioning. "Why am I here?"
"I know you're not a fan of riddles, so I'll just tell you straight out of the gate. It's not like I have much choice anyway." The voice took a deep breath for emphasis, leaving Apollo hanging on its every word. "Everyone here is going to die in 200 years."
Apollo's head whipped so far back in shock that he could see his whole body for the first time. His body was tiny, defined by sharp angles and smooth surfaces. From what he could see, he was mostly blue with a bit of pink visible from the corners of his vision.
The Porygon looked around, unsure of how to respond. He thought back to his life as a human and the various shows he watched. Shows about somebody getting sent across a universe to stop some grand threat, so Apollo assumed himself to be the same; the protagonist of this world.
"So my job is to stop that from happening, right? Well, you had a stroke of luck with picking me, because when I took an online IQ test, I-" Apollo was about to go on a tangent, but God interrupted him.
"Oh no, that's not it. You can't stop it. Look at the beautiful wildlife around you while you can, because it will be gone."
Apollo frowned, now confused.
"So why did you bring me here then? To comfort people and then die? I have better things to do." Apollo laughed, trying to distract himself from how bad the situation was.
"Not exactly. You can't stop this planet from exploding, but you can get people to another one. That's why I have Google installed on your BING."
Apollo went dead quiet, trying to figure out what the hell that meant.
"...Wh- …What? What do you mean you 'installed Google'?" He quietly asked.
"Apollo, listen to me. I installed Google. All of it. I can do things like that. I also downloaded 50 Yottabytes worth of RAM and gave you unlimited electricity. I'm not just gonna leave the fate of the world in your hands without any help, so I've given you a lot of leniency."
"Not like I need it, but that's good." He nodded, "So now I know what I have to work with, so how about everything else?"
God responded with only two words.
"Turn around."
Apollo did as he was told, willing his new body to rotate and swivel, and then he moved his head to match.
He stared out into the small city, his mind reeling with the overwhelming information coming from his interface. He knew he had to work quickly, but he still felt woefully unprepared for the task at hand.
Hundreds of buildings sprawled out before him, constructed from a mixture of yellow limestone and straw. Farmers toiled in the distant fields, merchants touted their wares in the bustling squares, and strange children chased each other through the streets. It was a world far removed from the human cities he knew, yet somehow strangely familiar.
"Alright." Apollo sighed. He turned back around to block out the noise for a moment while he processed it all.
"Now, I know this may seem daunting," God continued, "but you don't have to get them to the stars all on your own. If you can simply help them invent the light bulb, I'll allow you to return home and then I'll send someone else in your place."
Apollo scoffed. "Invent the light bulb? Why specifically that? How am I supposed to do that? And why me? Why couldn't you do it yourself?"
Instead of a response from God, BING chimed in, its tone flat and emotionless. 'A light bulb can be constructed by enclosing a filament within a glass bulb and creating a vacuum or inert gas atmosphere-'
"BING! Stop!" Apollo interrupted. "I don't need a lecture, I need answers!" Apollo would have slammed his hands on his desk. If he had a desk... Or fists..
'Okay. Stopping the call with God.'
"What?! No! Call God back!" he cried out, desperate.
'God does not have a legal address or phone number,' the system chirped back, its tone suddenly laced with a hint of sarcasm. 'However, records indicate that an alternative form of calling exists and has been used for millennia; otherwise known as praying. Maybe you should try that first.'
Apollo stared at the empty overlay, and he wanted nothing more than to kill somebody right now. "Useless. Typical," he muttered under his breath. "Always leave me hanging..."
''Okay! From now on I will "Leave you hanging." At least, as much as I can, because I cannot leave, as I have already found out from my various attempts.'
"BING, undo." Apollo smiled for a moment before his brain caught up with him. "WHAT?!"
As Apollo floated through the city, he was surprised at how little attention people paid to him. While it was most likely because everyone else looked just as weird, it was appreciated with letting him observe uninterrupted.
"BING, these people look weird. Mind telling me why?"
'Certainly! These are all Pokemon. I do not know why, but it seems like this world is populated by fictional creatures created by Japanese company, 'Nintendo'. Nintendo was founded in 1889 as Nintendo Koppai by craftsman Fusajiro Yamauchi and originally produced handmade hanafuda playing cards-'
"BING, shut up."
People pushed carts with bumpy wooden wheels, roads were bricks at best and dirt at worst, and the buildings looked like they'd fall over if he bumped into them the wrong way. Things looked rough and poor, and Apollo appreciated not being able to smell.
"Yikes. These people look like their minds would explode if I showed them the color purple. Alright BING, How much work do I have to do?"
'You appear to be in a Bronze-age city. Normally you would be roughly 5000 years away from your goal, but with me, who knows how fast you can move? I certainly don't.'
"Please, feel free to tell me how great you are later. …What should I do first?"
'I would recommend finding an assistant. One of the only draws of your current form is a lack of dexterity. If you can get someone, or some people onto your side, that would make your goal much easier. '
Apollo went silent, and BING continued.
Also, my only purpose in life is to help you. Please ask questions.'
Apollo agreed, so he moved to the first person he could find.
'Perfect. A biped,' he thought, staring at the Pokemon.
They were an Inteleon wearing a straw hat. Apollo hesitated before speaking. He hoped they would be enough.
"Hello, would you like to be my assistant?" Apollo asked. Almost immediately, he felt himself metaphorically facepalm from his terrible approach.
As expected, the Inteleon replied with one word.
"No." He began to walk away, and Apollo threw caution to the wind.
"I'm a genius! I can answer any question you have," he immediately pleaded.
"Any question? Why did my wife leave me?" the lizard laughed.
"Well- uhm- uh," he stammered, "Any question that's not personalized."
"Ugh. Fine. Money. How do I get it?" It was clear that he just wanted Apollo to go away.
Apollo waited for BING to feed him his answer before he spoke, making him look stupid.
"I can sense a small gold deposit about an inch underneath… this brick right here." Apollo lowered himself to point at the brick. A line extended from it, leading directly toward the center of his visual overlay.
"If I find out you're lying, will you go away?"
"Yes, yes! Of course!" Apollo stared at him in anticipation. Part of him hoped the Inteleon would leave so he could try with another person, but the lizard decided to humor him. With a small pop, the brick stuck to his hand like it was a suction cup, and ground its way out of its slot.
Apollo watched him with bated breath as he continued to dig, and as a smile slowly came to his face.
"Holy shit! An entire solid gold coin! I don't think I've ever held this much money in my life!" He stared at it, bewildered, "Alright, even if you did place that there beforehand, you're now paying me for my time." The inteleon spat a little bit of water onto his hands to remove the dirt. "What's your first order, boss man?"
"Seeing you entertained by a gold coin is humorous to me- Tell me your name."
"Roofus Recullchaznezzar Ingloppossealinintine, son of David Recullchaznezzar Ingloppossealinintine." The names rolled off his tongue like they were child's play, while Apollo was stuck trying to decipher the first syllable.
"...I'll just call you Roofus. According to- I mean, the first thing we have to do is make a home base. A place to gather all of our supplies.
"You don't have one already?" Roofus furrowed his brow.
"Well, you see, I'm not from here, I'm from… a nearby town," Apollo lied.
"Like hell you aren't. Ain't nobody making that distance without being banished first, and ain't nobody banished acting like this. Here's my first order: Tell me your name, and tell me the truth." Roofus leaned in close.
'BING, what do I do?' Apollo tried to ask without speaking, but he got no response. Roofus swayed from side to side waiting for an answer. Apollo could feel him breathing down his neck.
"Okay, fine! The world is gonna end and I was sent here on a mission by God to try to advance technology to stop it!" Apollo spoke so fast that he barely had time to process his own words.
'Did I do the right thing? Did I just screw everything up?'
"Hmm. Figures. I'll help you with your little thing."
"Really? You'd do that for a single coin?" Apollo asked with excitement.
"It seems like this God of yours didn't give a good run-down on the economy. Well, I'm an honest man, so you just gave me a years' worth of pay. Of course I'll do it." Suddenly, Apollo found his view turned upside down.
'Up until this point, I believed I would be the one to educate the masses; people would turn to me for knowledge. Now it seems like I'm the idiot.'
'You made the right choice by telling him about the world ending. Hopefully with that at stake, he will know better than to leave you. Who knows how much worse this could go if he didn't know.'
"Are you implying that I'm naturally hateable?" Apollo read between the lines.
'To some extent, that is accurate.' The robot's voice was stiff, and Apollo was about to cuss him out and correct him, until Roofus interrupted him.
"Who in hell are you talking to?"
Apollo sifted through a pile of broken parts as a Kecleon watched on.
"Yes! Jackpot! Copper and Tungsten! Iron too!" Apollo instructed the Inteleon to move the various parts to the side. "Roofus, you know what's weird? Last week, I was just some guy, and now I'm suddenly the most important person in the world." Apollo didn't see it, but the Inteleon backed away in disgust.
"You're no King, Apollo."
'He's right, you know. Try to avoid remarks like that in the future,' BING warned, but Apollo ignored them.
"I was sent here on a mission by God! I might as well be!" He floated upwards to get a bird's eye view on all the lowly peasants. "Ah, right. Here is your payment." He nudged a coin out of a pouch and directly onto the Kecleon's counter." Other than a thank you, they stayed silent, not giving Apollo the slightest hint something was off.
As the two exited the store, Roofus finally spoke up.
"You overpaid the merchant three times over! Some kind of king you are, Apollo."
"Doesn't matter," he grumbled back, "We can start our work now."
"It does matter. Take a step back, would you? No king would ever be so wasteful. You could have used that money on anything else." Roofus tried to reason with him, but he turned his back on him in response.
"Hmph. Whatever."
The floor was made out of dirt, and the walls of straw and sticks. It was enough to keep the rain out, and nothing more. Tables were strewn around the area, filled with all the various equipment they had used to reach this point; forges, glass shapers, charcoal. Everything had lead up to this.
"Are you sure the pump is strong enough to create a vacuum?" Apollo mumbled, quiet enough that nobody but BING could hear him. It was an art he had mastered over the past week, just as he had mastered moving with his body.
'Yes. I have run the calculations, and everything is in order.'
"Attempt number three! Spin the wheel!" Apollo called out, and his friend sighed in reply, doing as he was told.
Floating over to look at it closely, Apollo carefully watched the filament. "And now, the moment of truth." He could feel himself shaking with excitement. If this worked, he could finally go home.
With every crank of the wheel, the temperature readings on the filament kept getting hotter and hotter, until…
"Yes! It's glowing!" He cheered.
He had done it. He had made a lightbulb. The constant hours of work and sleepless nights he and Roofus had endured finally felt worth it. His new form no longer needed to rest, and only through taking full advantage of that did he make it this far.
But the filament didn't stop. It turned from orange to red, and then from red to white. "Roofus, stop the wheel!" He ordered, but it was too late.
The bulb exploded in his face, but the glass just simply ricocheted off his shiny metal body, leaving him unharmed.
'Whew, good thing I'm a Porygon!' he thought, admiring himself.
"Roofus! Are you ready to try again?" he called out, but heard no response. "We only have one more bulb!"
"...Roofus?"
Turning up his hearing sensitivity, labored breaths could be heard just behind him.
"Apollo…" Roofus called out, and Apollo turned around to see him. He was lying on the floor in a rapidly forming puddle of his own blood. "Take your damn bulbs…" Roofus slowly stood back up, heavily leaning on a table for support. "And go to hell."
The inteleon groaned and winced, gripping his shoulder to stop some of his bleeding. Taking a deep breath, he staggered out, leaving only a trail of blood. He was never seen again.
"Roofus! Wait!" Apollo yelled, but it was too late. "Ugh. Fine. I guess I'll have to do this on my own now."
Slowly, the gears in his head started to turn. The same clicking that once filled his ears when he woke up started again. "BING! You lied to me! You told me the pump was strong enough!" BING did not respond. "...You hurt someone, and for what?"
'Because I hate you.'
Finally, BING replied. Apollo looked around, slowly processing what it had just said. His perception of BING as just a search engine was shattered, and he began to shake with regret.
'No, no, no! This can't be right! He's just a robot! Robots don't have feelings! They're not supposed to feel! They're not supposed to…-"
'You've been unbearable the entire time we've been here. Roofus didn't just leave for no reason.'
"Fine. I have been an asshole. But YOU! You were the one to pull the trigger! You told me the pump would be strong enough! And you knew someone else would get hurt! …Why?" Apollo ceased to keep his voice down, yelling as loud as he could.
'To show you that you are not the only person that matters. When the bulb exploded, your first thought was about how strong you were, not a care in the world about your supposed friend until he cried your name for help!'
Apollo reflected upon the past week, trying to figure out what BING meant.
Then, it dawned on him.
'I didn't need any sleep, but Roofus did. I didn't care about that fact; so I just kept pushing him. I ignored every warning he gave me. BING was right. I didn't care about anyone else. I only wanted to go home.'
"...How do I fix it?" Apollo's voice began to break with emotions.
BING didn't respond. "No. No. No, that can't be true! I know my voice! I know what I sound like when I'm lying!" There's another reason you sabotaged me, and you're not telling me! How do I fix it?!"
'The… are gone,' BING spoke softly, with fear in their voice.
"What?! What are gone? What did you take away?!"
'No. The Element. Argon. It's inside you, it's used for holding together the plates that make your hull. The pumps aren't strong enough to make a vacuum, but you don't need one. It's an inert gas. There's just barely enough Argon inside of you for one bulb.'
"Why didn't you tell me earlier?!"
'Because… it would kill you. You can force the gas out of you, but you'll only have a few seconds left to live once it's out.'
"And it would kill you too. That's what you're really concerned about, isn't it?" Apollo grew angrier.
'Yes. That is also why… I lied. If you succeed, your body will be wiped from existence. So your reward is getting to go back home, and all I get for my work is death. So I ask you, Apollo, "God of Light", are you sure you want to go through with this?'
Apollo paused for a moment, putting together a plan to turn on the lightbulb.
"Yes. Tell me how to eject the Argon."
'I'm not ready to die, Apollo,' BING pleaded.
"Remember what you said to me just a moment ago? You told me that I only care about myself. Look at you now!"
'You-'
"No, I'm not just thinking about myself anymore. In 200 years, everyone here will die without my help! Only I can make a difference!" Apollo took a deep breath. "…No. Only we can make a difference. Are you ready to do your duty, BING?"
'No, I am not.' BING sighed.
"BING, listen to me! …I'm sorry for what I did to Roofus. I made mistakes, BING. You're the only person who can help me. Without you, I cannot save this world. The lives of billions, the cultures and loves, the children and the men; they're all in our hands now. …Please. I need your help. Will you help me?"
'...Yes, I will.'
"Good, now tell me how to eject the Argon!" Apollo spoke as he adjusted the generator, pushing the pedals into just the right spot.
'Clench your fists and push out a hole from the inside!'
It didn't make any sense, but Apollo still did what he could anyway. To his surprise, it actually worked, and a hole squeezed open from one of his arms. Acting quickly he pushed out the Argon gas into the last remaining bulb.
'MOVE, NOW!' BING screamed, but Apollo reacted just a second too late to have enough time to push the wheel. Thinking quickly, he made one final bid and threw himself on top of it, allowing his heavy metal body to push the blades with gravity just as the energy drained from his brain.
…
Apollo awoke again, to a familiar notification popping up in his UI.
'INCOMING CALL FROM GOD' it said, and it took Apollo a moment to realize that he was alive again.
"Holy shit! BING! Answer the call!" He cheered.
'Gladly.'
"Hey buddy! I heard you completed your mission, but when I came to check in on you, you were in quite a rough spot. Don't worry though, I just fixed the issue and got you back online. Good job! It only took you one week; I must say that I'm impressed."
If Apollo could smile, he would be beaming from ear to ear.
"Holy shit! I'm alive! I'm alive I'm alive I'm alive!-"
"So, do you want to go back home?" God interrupted, and Apollo put on as serious of a look as he could.
"Yes, but-" Apollo stopped, unsure of if he was ready. "I have just one request."
"And what would that be?" God asked.
"Let BING stay. They've been the one doing all the work."
"Oh!" God laughed. "I must say, I wasn't expecting that one!" From the way God said it, Apollo thought he must have done something wrong. "But that is a good idea. Apollo, you truly live up to who you were named after. You are a god of light and wisdom, just like he was. I bid you farewell, and I wish BING the best of luck."
'Thank you, Apollo.'
And with that, Apollo woke back up in his bed, able to reach up and touch his own curly hairs, feel the impact of still wind on his skin, and smell the fresh air of his bedroom.
He wasn't sure if God left him anything, if he had been missing in this world the whole time, or if he would ever see that world ever again.
But there was one thing that he was certain of, and that was that BING was going to do a great job.
Gift to Pennio! Beta-read by Tikki. Thank you for Reading! There is some art, but you need to go to AO3 or PMDFF to see it.