"I hate these cloaks. They're too warm and heavy. You think Pein would be open for a redesign?"

I was walking with my partner through Suna. The sun was relentless and beating down on us, and I was swimming with sweat under my heavy black and red cloak. Like, seriously? Who came up with the idea 'one cloak suits all'? If a cloak was good in rain and wind, why the heck did they think it would work in a freaking desert? You could tell Pein didn't go out in the field anymore because he didn't have a freaking clue.

"Complain all you want, Toothpick. No-one listens to what you think," Kisame replied.

"Sucks to be you then, you have no choice."

I had been with the Ataksuki for the past three years. It took me two years on my own to get their attention before I was approached - I was not officially a Missing Nin, and had no real reputation behind me, so I had to get their attention through various acts of subterfuge. Once they heard I was a deception and seals expert, they came knocking and offered me a place.

They painted a lovely picture of ending wars and the unification of nations...but by using tailed beasts? Methinks they didn't think through their plan well enough. That being said, that wasn't my place to interfere.

Soon after I joined, I met Hidan - he was gobsmacked at my appearance. Years before, when in ROOT, Danzo had me pose as his illegitimate child. When he saw me, he immediately tried to kill me - stating that my existence was an abomination - but stopped when Konan explained it had all been a ruse. Since then, I like to think I became a favourite of his (but only because he never threatened to kill me again...otherwise you'd never know).

While the Akatsuki spoke about peace and unity, they were not thrilled to find out I was largely a pacifist...or at least that I didn't believe in killing people. They wanted my skills, so put up with it, but partnered me with Hoshigaki Kisame - in the hopes his thrill for fighting would balance each other off.

They were fucking idiots.

Kisame soon figured out that we had met in Kiri, and initially seemed to hate me - to put in mildly. He wanted nothing to do with me, and seemed determined to avoid me at all costs. Even when on missions, he would disappear until he was actually needed. After a while, he began to tolerate me, and then start to appreciate my problem solving skills. He once called me a 'tactical wizard,' which was a huge compliment, coming from the guy.

We had a strange friendship, which probably looked nothing like it from the outside, but he was actually half decent - or as much as a sadistic murderous asshole could be.

But my favourite thing about him? He wouldn't kill someone unless there was no other choice anymore. After hours of hearing me rant and rave, he agreed if only to shut me up...he probably didn't stick to this on solo missions, but it'd take what I can get.

"I've learned to drone out your complaints long ago. Keep going all you want."

"Dangerous words, Kisame."

We were on our way to a village in Wind country to get information on the local Daimyo. There was a rumour there was a scroll containing black-mail worthy information, and our client wanted it, if it existed. It was my mission, but Kisame said he'd accompany me as he was bored.

Unlike the others, we occasionally went separately. His appearance didn't mesh with my missions, and my morals didn't often mesh with his. I was in fairly high demand, and he often acted in a bodyguard capacity.

Over the years, my health has slightly waned. I was still combat ready, but my physical strength and endurance was not what it was. In Konoha, I was on several daily medications - from hormone supplements to other things - but I couldn't get regular access out here, or at the right strengths. I managed what I could, but it just wasn't the same. My muscle mass was lower, no matter how much I worked out, and my bones were at about the same level as a seventy year old...I couldn't even remember the amount of bone breaks I had suffered in the last few years - but I was much quicker and more efficient at healing them now.

Hence Kisame's love of the nicknames 'Toothpick' and 'Twig', because he could easily snap me like one.

"Are you sure you left your village? Because I'm thinking they kicked you out to get rid of you."

I scoffed. "You have no idea how right you are, Kisame. The Hokage is a prized prat."

He snorted in reply. He was aware of my feelings on Hiruzen.

The mission was a quick in-out job. So easy it didn't even warrant the pay, but the scroll was as expected. I gave Kisame the scroll to take back to base in Rivers - Konan wanted me to meet with a potential client in Rain. Apparently I was far more charismatic than Kisame, and this client needed a bit more of a delicate touch...in other words: flirt without the scary dude behind you.

We split when we were half way between the two, with him warning me I had three days before he came to find me. He didn't like me being used on 'seduction' assignments left alone...but I was a big girl with lots of things that go 'boom'. Also, since joining, I had started to meddle with poisons and knock out gases with my seals, to balance my lack of fighting capabilities. I'd had some...interesting results. Knock out tags were all well and good, but sometimes you needed a wider target.

As I crossed the border through Rain, the weather changed and became a lot more bearable. This was the kind of weather the cloaks were made for, thank you very much.

It was nearing night, so I decided to stop by a tavern with lodgings for the night. I folded and placed my cloak in a bag, and placed a genjutsu upon entering - I didn't wear my true face in public anymore. The only reason I didn't use a disguise with the cloaks was because the collar hid enough of my face you would have no idea.

I paid for my bed, meal and sake and sat down to enjoy the night in the main room. I chose a disguise of an elderly woman, so there would be little to no attention on me. I was about to head upstairs, when I noticed a familiar mane of white hair, so I picked up the remains of my sake bottle and went over to join him.

"Hello, young man!" I said, in a cheery voice. "Would you mind if I sat down? You look like good company and I have so many stories to tell."

Jiraiya perked up at me and screwed his eyes up before snorting and kicking a stool out. "Sure thing, grandma! All are welcome to sit with the great Jiraiya! Now tell me! Are these tales of love, sorrow or life lessons!"

I activated the privacy seal. "Tales about how much I'd like to kick your head in, but you know, guess that'll have to wait for another day."

"Erena, always so charming. What brings you to Rain?"

"No idea, just scoping potential clients. I need to pretend to be nice. It's going to be exhausting."

"Only for you...most people manage without much difficulty. Now, anything interesting for me?" He asked.

Since joining the Akatsuki, Jiraiya had been my handler. Only the Hokage and Jiraiya knew of my true loyalties, and that I was a member of the Akatsuki. Apparently the true mission of the Akatsuki and it's members were unknown to the masses, but I had a general reputation for being a shapeshifter...it was quite flattering, really. It's amazing how utilising seals to alter your appearance could lead to such stories.

"Nothing of interest. Tales of bribery and corruption...nothing that will really effect the Allied Nations much."

"Good to know. I've got nothing for you either, everything seems calm at the moment."

"Calm before the storm, hmm?" I took a drink. He eyed me carefully.

"Usually, yes...You know, I don't think I've seen you without a drink the last couple of years? Everything okay?"

"Pfft...like you care." I scoffed. "Besides, I always catch you in bars, thats not exactly my fault."

Despite my deflection, he was largely correct. It was even something Kisame commented on sometimes. I wasn't a drunk, by any means, but I had found that sake tending to dull things slightly. And being someone whose brain goes a million miles an hour, sometimes I really needed to slow down. It was a problem, but one I didn't care about at the moment. That would be for another day.

"Hmmm...if you say so. But if anything changes, you'll let me know? We can't have you putting the mission at risk."

"The mission, of course."

It was always the mission. Never about little old me. I kind of forgot what it felt like to have someone in your corner. I guess I had Kisame, but he'd gut me in a second if he thought I was a traitor. Even in ROOT I could rely on Yumi and Kutsu...but here I had no one.

I stood up abruptly, taking the bottle with me. "Well, if thats all, I'm going to bed. I'll make sure to check in sometime within the next three months." I left before he replied. I was in no mood for conversation.

The next morning I met the client - a particularly sleazy merchant. He wanted someone assassinated for crossing him and exposing his fraud to the local merchants guild. Despite my beliefs, I wasn't allowed to refuse these missions - only negotiate costs and parameters. After a bit of cozy flirtation, and a borderline lap dance, I got us a favourable rate, and said someone would be dispatched within the next three weeks. He seemed very pleased.

To head back to the Akatsuki hideout, I took a shortcut through a part of Fire Country. I didn't near any settlements, but it always made me feel a little on edge. I tried to avoid it as much as I could, but I still ventured through it every so often...I missed the trees of home so much.

I was only a few hours from crossing the border back to Waterfall when I heard sounds of fighting. I looked around and found a group of genin fighting three Missing Nin...I recognised them from my days on the Missing Nin task force.

Unless they had massively powered up in the last five years, they were pretty small fish...they were found out for selling codes to enemies, and ran before they could be captured. Chuunin level at best...but three genin didn't stand a chance.

Where the fuck was their sensei?

I watched at the edges for a few minutes, but decided to intervene when the girl was about to get her throat sliced by a well handled kunai. I activated my Time Flicker seal, removed my cloak and went over to grab the missing nin by the throat, and pushed him over away from the young brunette, before sticking a knockout tag on him. I looked to the other two, and did the same.

I deactivated it, then looked to the three kids...considering they were mid fight and their opponents were now unconscious on the ground, they looked deeply confused.

I immediately recognised the tallest one as a Hyuuga...Hizashi's son, if I wasn't mistaken. The girl was wearing a cheongsam type dress and little buns in her hair - I immediately applauded her style choices. The third, however...

"When the fuck did Maito Gai get a clone?"

The final one was like a mini-me Gai...it made my heart clench a little. He had on the same green spandex, very similar hair...the only difference was the wide eyes, which I tried to focus on.

"Who are you?" The Hyuuga asked, at the same time the Mini-Gai said, "You know Gai-Sensei!"

Oh fuckity fuck. Gai had a genin team. And they were right in front of me.

"And where the fuck is your sensei? Leaving you with three missing nin is the opposite of a smart move. He should know better."

"How do you know Gai-sensei? Are you from Konoha?"

I waved my hands back and forth in a 'so-so' motion. "That's not important. What is important is what to do with you until he gets back."

Even though I wanted to high tail it out of there faster than you could say 'shunshin', I couldn't leave these three alone...

"Gai-sensei set us on survival training while he does a quick errand. There wasn't supposed to be anyone near here," the girl said.

"And when is he supposed to get back?"

"Tomorrow morning?"

My fucking luck. "Great. Good. Fucking fantastic. Then here's what we do- you three tie them up and be careful not to touch the knockout tags on their backs. I'm going to find suitable cover for the night and then we'll make camp. In the morning, you'll tell your sensei he's a fucking idiot - and yes, use those exact words - for choosing an area for survival training without checking it out with Intelligence first. And if he does it again I'll stick my Unyouthful foot up his ass. Understood?" They all nodded. "Then what are you waiting for - chop chop!"

They all scrambled with ropes and did as I asked. Thankfully their rope skills were up to par. There was a good area less than a mile away, covered by trees and sleeping area hidden by bushes, so I directed them there.

They were about to start a fire when I stopped them. "Fire? Light? Smoke? Really?"

"But it will get cold at night," the girl said.

Goddamn kids. I took out an empty scroll and scribbled a seal on it before activating. Heat immediately poured out.

"Amazing!" The Mini-Gai said. "What is this?"

"Portable heater scroll. It'll last a few hours before burning up. Enjoy."

"I had no idea you could use seals for things like this..." the girl said in awe.

"Seals can do pretty much whatever you want, if you can imagine it and figure it out."

"Wow...are you a seals master?"

"Yea, sure," I replied. I really didn't want to talk to much more, but children never did respect privacy.

"Wow..."

The Hyuuga stayed silent during the whole exchange. "What's up, buttercup?"

He glared. "We don't know you, and here you are helping us? You clearly aren't from Konoha! What do you want?"

Good, at least one of them has a healthy dose of paranoia.

"I'm just travelling from A to B. Sorry I'm a bit of a soft touch and didn't want to see three kids get killed by some low level missing nin."

"How do we know you aren't trying to kidnap us?"

"You don't...but if I wanted to, don't you think you'd be the ones tied up with knockout tags on you? Think what you want, but I'm going to sleep. I'd recommend that you do the same...feel free to do rotating shifts to watch guard."

"You're just going to sleep? What if someone comes?"

I snorted. "If anyone can sneak up on me, they deserve to get me."

He narrowed his eyes. "How can we trust you when we don't even know your name?"

"Call me Erena," I replied. No point in hiding, since Gai would figure it out when he talked to them in the morning. "And you?"

"I'm TenTen, and this is Rock Lee, and Neji."

"Oh I knew it, you are Hizashi's son!"

That surprised him. "You know my father?"

I shrugged. "I know your uncle better. Your father seemed alright though...okay, story time over. I'm off to sleep. Feel free to ask any questions in the morning..." I rolled over and turned my back to them.

I feigned sleep, while my mind was in turmoil. This was the most contact I'd had with Konoha nin in years. I avoided them on mission and would never engage, but then a group of kids come along - and not just any kids but Gai's fucking genin team - and I blab. By the time it makes it back to Konoha, I'd be long gone, but the damage would be done.

While I was sure Hiruzen would be covering my disappearance somehow, if certain people got wind of me, I was concerned that they may start looking into things further. And if they did, there was the potential my cover would be blown and everything would have been for nothing.

I was just before dawn, when I decided to make a move for it. All of the kids were asleep (so much for rotating watch shifts), and I wanted to leave before Gai got here.

I quietly grabbed my things, activated the new-and-improved chameleon tag (I was now practically invisible, unless you have a dojutsu), and headed to the trees. As soon as I felt a familiar chakra signature approach, I left.

I made it back the the base before Kisame started to get cross with me, gave my report to Pein (grumpy bastard as always. Obviously I omitted my run in with the genin), then went back to my room. I found one of the bottles of sake that Kisame hadn't removed, drank and promptly passed out.

Interlude

..."And then this woman appear out of no where, and then they were knocked out with seals, and she helped us set up camp and had this cool heater scroll so we didn't even need a fire. I didn't even realise seals could do that!"

Gai's emotions were doing somersaults. The Hokage had sent him on a small side mission to get information from Jiraiya from a field agent, but he had unknowingly left his Genin in danger! He vowed to never make the same mistake again. For such Unyouthful Missing Nin to attack children and almost cost them their lives? He had almost failed as their sensei!

TenTen was giving her account while the boys stayed quiet. She seemed enthralled by the kunoichi that had crossed their path, and he would be forever grateful that she had appeared to gave them.

"Yes, seals can be used for many things! I have known a couple of seal masters - but it is a difficult path to learn. You must have the utmost dedication and perseverance!"

"But you think I could learn?"

"If you put your mind to it, you can achieve anything!" He gave her a smile and a thumbs up. It seemed to have the intended effect as TenTen suddenly looked determined - a look he had never seen on her before. It was most Youthful!

"Oh, and this Erena said to tell you that you were a 'fucking idiot' for not checking things with Intelligence, and 'that if you do it again she'll stick her Unyouthful foot up your ass.' Who is she anyway?" Neji asked.

Gai froze, and his smile dropped.

"Gai-Sensei!" Rock Lee shouted. "Are you okay? What happened?"

"Did you say Erena? Did you tell you that was her name?" He asked the three Genin urgently. It couldn't be - he hadn't seen or heard of her in five years. No one had. Looking back, he should have known something was amiss when he last saw her, but he was too happy to truly notice.

When he received word that she was missing and presumed captured, and that even Kakashi could not track her, he wilted for a long time. He had long thought that she was dead. But if she were still alive?

"Yes, Gai-Sensei," Rock Lee confirmed, confused. "She definitely said her name was Erena."

"Fuck."

"Hokage-sama, I must protest. This is not the way of Konoha. We stand by our shinobi. We owe it to her. I owe it to her." Kakashi was desperate, he couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"She was one of our finest, but we simply cannot spare the resources necessary to search again. Our forces are spread thin, Jounin are in short supply and we have mission requests to fulfil. I am sorry, I truly am."

"But-"

"No, Kakashi. It is my final answer."

Kakashi gave the Hokage a curt nod before turning around and walking stiffly out the door, Gai behind him. He was seething. Between anger and guilt, he didn't know what his main emotion was. 'Those who break the rules are trash, but those who abandon their comrades are worse than trash'...he had lived that mantra for many years. He had already failed too much. He had already abandoned her in a dark place once before- when he left her alone in ROOT the first time. The Hokage gave his order, but Kakashi couldn't accept it. Wouldn't. Not again.

After Gai had rushed back and explained what had happened to Kakashi, they decided to approach the Hokage for authorisation to head out to scope the area. It was likely she was gone, but they may find a clue. Any clue.

They needed a plan, and they needed help.

"I have an idea," he said, and Gai nodded stiffly.

They made their way towards the Uchiha compound. They slipped in without protest, and made their way to the training grounds. It was easy enough to find their targets.

Sure enough, he found both of them together. They seemed to be taking a rest from training, and were sitting against a target post in silence.

"Both of you, with us. Now."

He gave them no room to protest, and walked away. As predicted, Itachi and Shisui swiftly followed and he took them to a covered area, throwing up a silencing seal for good measure. He was pretty sure he was about to commit treason, and maybe become a missing nin in the process...the less ears the better.

"What's got your panties in a twist, Hatake? You look like someone shat in your cereal." Shisui was a smartass.

"Erena is alive."

Both stilled. Slowly Itachi turned to stare at Kakashi straight in the eye, his sharingan active, face taut.

"Explain."

Gai spoke. "I sent my genin on a training expedition near the Waterfall border while I did a small side mission, and they were attacked by missing nin. A kunoichi with great speed and sealing skills saved them, and kept them safe until the morning, after which she left before I arrived."

"But how can you be sure if was really her?"

"She volunteered her name," Gai cleared his throat. "And she told my genin to tell me I was a 'fucking idiot' and she would 'stick her Unyouthful foot up my ass.'"

Shisui snorted. "That's Erena, alright."

"And you did you not look for her?" Itachi practically hissed. Kakashi was used to Itachi being the voice of reason, soft spoken and calm demeanour. This was different.

Gai shook his head. "There was no trace of her, and I could not leave my Genin alone again. As soon as I returned, I reported it"

"When do we leave?"

Kakashi shook his head. "The Hokage has denied clearance for a rescue mission."

"WHAT?" An uncharacteristically silent Shisui practically shouted. "That is utter bullshit. On what grounds?"

"Lack of resources."

"Fuck that. I don't care if I end up a missing nin, I'm going. Just tell me where to find her, and I'll send you a postcard." Shisui started pacing, hands clenched. Where Kakashi was angry, Shisui was furious. It didn't help that he was the captain on the final mission, and being denied the chance to fix a mistake, and rescue a close friend would have been torture.

"Do you think I came all the way over here for a little chat, Shisui? Hmm?" They glared at each other. They were on the same side, but Kakashi understood emotions were high.

"...what were the Hokages words, exactly?" Itachi asked calmly.

Kakashi explained the conversation verbatim.

"Do you feel that an effective search could be accomplished with the four of us alone?"

Shisui scoffed. "The four of us could probably level a country, if we wanted."

"Shisui, destruction is not the key here. This is a search and rescue. We need to search for her quickly and effectively, without the Hokage finding out."

Shisui simple crossed his arms and rolled his eyes. "My statement still stands. Fuck the Hokage." Itachi gave him a tired glance. Kakashi sighed.

"Yes, the four of us will suffice," Kakashi answered. "I have my nin-ken to assist you with the tracking."

"Shisui," Itachi now focused on him. "Your dalliance with Ginko in Mission Processing, please tell me it ended amicably?"

Shisui scoffed. "More than amicably." Kakashi didn't want to know.

"Excellent. Here is my plan-"

Itachi and Shisui were due R and R soon-they had not taken any leave in a year, and the commanders were starting to get pushy. The facts they applied suddenly and together caused no raised eyebrows-they were basically each other's shadows. The leave request would not even make it to the Hokage-it was not necessary.

Kakashi had no missions planned, and had a reputation for avoidance at the best of times. Itachi recommended a shadow clone placed to keep up appearances, should the Hokage want to check he hadn't gone rogue.

For Gai, they suggested a small break for the genin to clear their heads after a potentially traumatising mission - he sent TenTen to the library to start research on sealing, and the others were to train in defence if they could. None of then objected.

In order for this to keep legitimate and for deniability of going against orders, Itachi filled for an A rank mission request. Due to Shisuis 'contact', all paperwork was correct, even if it was 'misfiled' into the approved section, prior to reaching the Hokages eyes. It was ensured nothing could lead back to her (Shisui guaranteed she was 'very' good at what she did, but the others weren't sure he was talking about paperwork).

"And who will be 'officially' financing the mission on the paperwork? It cannot trace back to me." Kakashi said. Considering everything they were doing to avoid repercussions, they had to ensure there was no specific name trail.

"The Uchiha Clan will be the financiers for all costs, should it be brought up," Itachi pledged.

"And if it gets back to your father?"

"He will pay with no hesitation. The Uchiha Clan owes Erena a debt that cannot be repaid."

Now that was interesting...for a whole clan to owe a single shinobi? That was big.

"Can we not use that political clout to sway the Hokage? Surely that would be simpler?"

"No, it could still be rejected, and then any further attempt will be thwarted," Itachi explained. "But it will be our fallback. As a wise kunoichi once said 'it's better to ask forgiveness than permission.'"

"Never have truer words been spoken," Shisui agreed, fixing his weapons. "Enough chit chat, gentlemen. Let's go find a potential damsel in distress."

Itachi sighed. "...if she ever hears you called her that, I'm not getting involved."