"I talked to Peeta today," Prim said as Katniss was skinning a squirrel she caught that day.

"You did?" Katniss hadn't even seen the newest victor in a while. Even then he just seemed to look through her. Since he won the games, things in District 12 have been better. Not drastically but there were less deaths do to starvation.

"Yeah, he was out by the fence, just staring into the woods."

"Why was he doing that?" Peeta was no hunter or forager, as proven by his lack of skills during his games.

"He said he was just thinking. He did ask me what I thought was beyond the woods."

"What were you doing by the fence, you know not to get near it." Just because the electricity was off sometimes didn't mean it was off all the time. She didn't want Prim to get electrocuted.

"I was playing in the meadow when I saw him pass. He looks so sad. He doesn't have any friends anymore since he got back. Both Town and Seam kids think he's too stuck up now. I just think he's sad."

"I think so too. I want you to stay away from him though."

"Why?"

"We don't know what kind of damage the games did to him. I've heard of victors hurting others in their districts because they couldn't control it." That was the only things she heard from older people in the Hob, it wasn't something that they aired because that wasn't the image the Capital wanted to project.

"Can you be his friend? You're not scared of anything."

"I don't think that's a good idea."

"Please?" Never had she been able to deny her sister anything.

"I'll try." It's all she could promise, she wasn't the friendliest person.

The next games were in three months. It would be the first time in her life that there would be two mentors. She really didn't know what help Peeta would be. Unlike Haymitch who had skills and smarts to get out of the arena alive, Peeta's was pure luck. Several things worked in his favor, mostly that people forgot he existed until it was down to the last two. Not only that, but there were also several grudges going in then the boys from 1 and 2 having their pact to take themselves out of it. Everything aligned perfectly for Peeta to get out of the arena. Lots of other kids were upset because they had lost family or friends who actually tried and Peeta walked away with basically nothing happening to him. Not only that, but he's also done nothing for the district besides the parcels which aren't really his. He just sits in that big house while the rest of the district dies.

After talking herself into and out of making friends with Peeta she decided to do it. He had saved her life once and he didn't have to. He suffered abuse for that act. First she looked by the fence near the meadow, he wasn't there. Then she went to the Hob, because he'd been seen there a few times. He wasn't this time. She finally found him by accident. He was standing outside the bakery, looking in but not making a move to go in.

"Hi," she said. Peeta gave no reaction to her. "Are you working in the bakery again?" Nothing. "Well, at least I can tell Prim honestly I tried."

"Do you know what burning flesh smells like?"

"I burned my hand once but not really."

"It's indescribable. One second someone is there standing in front of you and the next they are in pieces because someone pushed a button when they shouldn't have. Whatever you do, try your hardest not to get picked. Don't take anymore tesserae, trust me, it's not worth it."

That bothered her. "Funny from someone from Town and now one of the two richest people in District 12."

"Do you ever think about escaping?"

"Talk like that will get you lashed on a post or worse."

"Nothing they can do to me that they already haven't."

"Are you alright?" She was seeing past the Peeta she was used to; she was seeing the sadness Prim told her about. Prim, even as young as she was, could read people much better than Katniss.

"Don't mind me."

"What's the Capital like?"

Peeta looked at her like she just asked him when the end of the world was.

"Fine. It's fine. I've really got to go."

It was the day of the Reaping, and her nerves were bad. Usually, they weren't this bad but because the last winner was from District 12, more attention would be paid to the tributes. She looked up on stage and saw both Peeta and Haymitch sitting quietly. Effie Trinket was at the podium, but most knew about her child with Haymitch now. The boy wasn't in sight, he was excused from being there since he was underage and didn't have a sibling of age. Katniss wondered where he was, that was until the names started to be drawn.

Katniss noticed Effie's makeup was a little less, her dress a little less colorful and she was not good at faking enthusiasm. There was no joking or laughter from this, they knew it was because in five years her son would be in the mix with the twelve-year-old boys, waiting to see if he was called.

"Our girl tribute is Sharlie Denny."

Katniss didn't recognize the name. A girl of about sixteen walked slowly up to the front. She had the same shellshocked face on that everyone else ever had. At least she had a little bit of a chance. She was wearing a dress that Katniss knew was made at the Childrens' home. That meant she was tough, hopefully.

"Congratulations," Effie said but it wasn't her usual cheeriness. "Alright, now for our boy tribute." Stirring the names as she went, finally Effie pulled out a name.

"Evan Denny."

For the second time in District 12 history a brother and sister were drawn. She didn't need to know who they were to know they were siblings. As soon as the boy's name was called the girl broke down in tears. A boy of about fifteen walked up to the stage. Both were rail thin with the boy a little taller than the girl. She pretended she didn't notice when Peeta got up and left, disappearing into the Justice Building, ignoring the Peacekeepers and Haymitch calling to him.

"I can't do this," Peeta said as soon as Haymitch found him.

"Kid, this is the job."

"They're going to die and there is nothing we can do."

"I'm not going to lie, yes, they are going to die. But don't kill them before they even get in there."

"Where did this optimism come from? When I was on the way to the Capital you made it clear we were going to die."

"This isn't about you anymore. Your job is to help them, so do it." Haymitch turned and stalked away from the boy.

It's always hardest your first year, he had thrown up his first few years as mentor. But Peeta wasn't who this was about anymore, until their last breaths the two tributes needed them. This was the first time in a long time he was going sober, and he didn't care for it one bit. He's had a few setbacks throughout the year, but Ivo begged him not to drink anymore and it tore at him enough to try again. Once a day Peeta would show up to make sure he was still sober, and Ivo was eating. Over the past six months the innocent boy from before had slowly disappeared.

Brother and sister tributes, why did it have to be siblings? They both would end up dying trying to protect the other. His mind went back to his first sibling pair. His advice killed them both. He's learned more in the years since, but he had no hope that they would live. Then again, he had no hope the boy staring out the window of the train would survive either.

Effie had gone straight to her room. He left Ivo with the Hawthorne family, Ivo liked them. He paid quite a bit, and it was above review because it was for childcare of a victor's child. He wanted Ivo far away from the Capital, it was a mistake taking him on the Victory Tour.

When the food was put in front of the two teenagers, Haymitch suppressed a smile. Seeing the girl eat the stew with a smile, the boy pushed his stew over to her. There was lots of food, but it was just a nice thing he would have done for his sister when they were young. Haymitch's sister had been dead for over twenty years, he still missed her.

He noticed Peeta had stopped staring out the window and was now sitting far away from the tributes, writing furiously.

"What should we do?" the boy tribute, Evan asked. It had been the first thing they had said.

"Do you have any skills?" he asked them.

"I can sew," the girl said. Not a really useful skill in the arena but it wouldn't help to tell her that.

"What about you?"

"I can climb and jump pretty far." Now that could be useful but not in helping attack others.

"Doesn't matter. None of it matters," Peeta said.

Haymitch was getting real sick of the woe as me attitude from Peeta. Getting up, he grabbed the boy by the collar and pulled him into his room.

"Listen, I'm not going to tell you what happened to you doesn't matter, it does. I won't tell you to put on a happy face and everything will be ok because it won't. What I am going to tell you is those two kids won't be coming back with us. They'll either be sent later in a storage car or there won't be enough to send back home. I told you before this isn't about you."

"Oh, now it's not about me. How many years have you been too drunk to even know what's going on around you? Just because you're sober now doesn't give you a pass on twenty years of being a drunk, self-serving bastard."

Haymitch had never heard the boy come even close to using language like that, he didn't even know he knew it.

"I got a visit the other day, did you know?" Peeta asked.

"What? No."

"I've been purchased exclusively for the next year by Julius Snow. Lucky me right? I'll be ready when we get there, I'll do everything in my power to help them but give me this one ride to just think about me. Because it may not be about me but it's sure as hell is me paying the price for winning. Winning," Peeta said then laughed bitterly. "Tell the tributes to read the small print, like you didn't me."

Peeta was working out how to use Evan and Sharlie's skills to their advantage. They were both older than him, but they had no clue what being trapped in that place felt like. No idea that there were things worse than dying.

An Avox found him in his room watching over some of the ten or so games highlights. He didn't win his games, not really, he just outlived everyone. Although he felt guilty for Tiva's death, he should have never put the bags in there.

The Avox handed him a note. "Thank you," he told her before she left.

My room tonight at 9

J. Snow

Peeta folded the note up and grabbed his notebook, where he had been writing everything. The games, the Capital, Snow…both of them, the districts, it was all chronicled down. He was adding to it every day and soon would need a new notebook. If anyone found it, he would be killed along with a lot of other people.