Chapter 48

Man to man, tell me the truth, tell me
Were you ever there when she needed you?
Man to man, look me in the eye and tell me
If you really loved her, why'd you make her cry?
Man to man, well who cheated who?
You're the one to blame, tell me it ain't true
Man to man —Man to Man, Gary Allen

Jasper

We survived an uncomfortable family get together Bella unexpectedly brought Edward to. I was driving Emmett's pickup to The Rack, happy that me, him, Seth, and Jake were all together again after nearly a year. Seth rode shotgun, and Jacob and Emmett were sitting in the backseat. Emmett couldn't drive. He'd been sipping from a flask he'd taken out of his luggage ever since we picked him up from the ferry, in the mood to party and celebrate his homecoming.

On the way, Jacob said, "I wish Bella wouldn't have brought that guy. I can't stand him."

I expected no one to respond to him. A few minutes later, Emmett said, "I know you don't want to hear this, Jake, but Edward is a real decent guy."

If you knew he didn't want to hear it, why'd you say it? I glared at Emmett through the rear-view mirror. He didn't notice me.

Emmett and Edward were friends from football. We all made friends with him by now, because he was around so much. Maybe Emmett just wanted Jake getting used to Edward being around us with Bella. I could have told him that would never happen if he gave me the chance.

Jake's withdrawn but relaxed demeanor cracked, and he grumbled with hostility. "Yeah, you would say that... She was off-limits to me, though, huh?"

Seth and I glanced at each other. I made a "what's going on?" face at him. He shrugged an "I don't know" back.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Emmett asked, his tone heated.

Angered, Jake's eyes narrowed. "You know damn well what it means."

"Hey, if you've got something to say to me, say it!"

One of the ugliest vibes I ever experienced quickly strained the atmosphere.

I was hoping Jake would ignore Emmett. He was used to ignoring Emmett whenever Emmett got irritating. Moments later, Jake let out a course breath. "If it wasn't for you back then, I'd be the one with her now."

He said what he wanted to say, and I hoped it stopped there.

But then Emmett asked, "How do you figure? I don't know what you think I did or why it's my fault? I'll tell you what, though. There was a lot of other shit going on between you two."

Seth shifted in his seat, glancing up at the roof-ceiling and sucking in a breath, tense. I wondered if he ever told Jake about him and Bella.

"I know better than anyone in this truck why you aren't together," Emmett snapped.

I didn't know Emmett's meaning, but Jake sure did.

"Shut the fuck up!" His command was a no-joke warning. Tensed jawed, Jake's face was pulsing in fury.

I knew his look. It was the expression he got whenever someone gave him a good hard shot that rang his bell. He got that expression as he leveled up, and you knew it was over for the other guy.

Taking a quick look over my shoulder at Emmett, I scowled, shaking my head, and glaring for him to let it rest. But Emmett never could shut up. If he had a point to make, he'd make it. That's just the way he'd always been, alcohol or no alcohol. He rolled his eyes at me, and, turning to Jake, he asked, "Or what, Jake? Don't forget... I can fight, too!"

I threw my head back. Holy Hell, Emmett! Nerves prickled up in me. I wondered the reason for Emmett's escalating words, alcohol, guilt, or both, as the image of them fighting soared through my mind. Emmett was two-hundred and thirty pounds of line backing muscle that knew how to take and throw a punch, and Jake was Jake! Every fighter knew what that meant. He didn't have a wicked outside-of-the-ring fighting reputation for nothing. I once saw him destroy a huge guy, who'd tackled him, from the ground and on his back when the guy was too heavy for Jake to get out from underneath him. He just kept swinging upward and pounding at the guy's face with both fists until the guy was so bloody and tired, he just fell right off him.

I jumped when Seth shouted. "Shut up!" He turned to the back seat to face them. "Both of you! Knock it off and shut the hell up!"

When I glanced at Emmett in the review mirror, the anger-glossed expression he wore told me he wouldn't stop. He said, "No, Seth! He wants to blame someone."

Seth stared straight ahead, his expression stone.

"If he wants to blame somebody, he can blame himself," Emmett said, then he looked over at Jake again. "You're not together, because you were too busy being with other girls. You were too busy fucking around, trying to knock somebody up!"

Me and Seth's heads snapped toward each other.

Jake's enraged face shattered into a mixture of hurt. He banged the side of his fist against the door. "Stop the truck!"

I thought if I stopped, they might fight for sure. I kept on driving.

Jake gritted his teeth. "I said. Stop. The. Truck!"

"Stop the truck, Jazz," Seth mumbled, "Let him out."

I pulled over in a business parking lot we approached, reminding myself they were best friends. Emmett loved Jake. It was just a heated discussion between brothers. They wouldn't fight.

Jacob flew out of the rear door. He stomped to the back of the truck and stood behind it. A minute went by, and Emmett said, "Shit!" He jumped out, too.

Seth was about to hop out after them. I reached over and touched his arm. "Give them a second to talk it out. I can watch them from the mirror." I rolled down the window, trying to hear what they were saying as I monitored them.

Then, Seth started in with his own crap. He said, "Jake's right! If Emmett wasn't such a bitch, back then. Jake and Bella probably would be together right now."

My temperature flared. "That's not true!" He had no room to talk with the part he played in them not being together.

"Hell yeah, it is. I was there!"

I wasn't there the day he was talking about, but I knew what went on, so I said, "Well, I was there back then, and I seem to remember someone else always in their way."

The reality of the situation: I was the only one in our group not involved in keeping them apart. Leah had told me she didn't want them getting together either, at first, because of Seth. No, that's not a hundred percent true. Nobody had to tell me what was going on. I could feel it and see it by how people acted around each other. I could have helped Jake and Bella out in the beginning because I knew they liked each other. Deep down, I was going for Seth, at least until she made her first choice. He was my best friend. I was just a kid back then. What did I know?

Seth's brow crumpled, and he sneered at me from the corner of his eye. "Me and Jake worked that out."

I shrugged. "All right." If you say so...

It wasn't anybody's fault, really. Whatever Jake did to turn Bella against him so much, probably wasn't even his fault. When a person is as young, like we all were, then and now, how is anyone supposed to know who will be The One? I had a couple of girlfriends I thought I loved. It turned out I was wrong. But that we were all here, all this time later, arguing about what happened between them, must have meant something.

When Emmett and Jake finished talking, they climbed back into the truck. "Back home?" I asked, sure none of us still wanted to hangout.

"The Rack," they said in unison. We continued to the pool hall. Jacob stared out the side window, and in a clear voice, he said, "For the record, I wasn't... what you said, Emmett... Fucking around, wanting to be with someone else. Shit, just happened. I was trying to make something out of my life, so I don't get stuck in La Push. I still am."

"Yeah, I know. I'm sorry for what I said, Jake. I didn't mean it."

Back at home, when I asked about their conversation, Emmett said that Jake thought he wouldn't have gone away to school if he'd got with Bella back then. He'd always loved her, and if he could do it all over, he would. Emmett mentioned he believed Jake, because he still held the same feelings for Rosalie, and they met, not as young as Jake and Bella, but still young.

I felt awful for Jake. With the way their situation affected us all, the entire universe seemed out of whack.

"Jacob's in terrible shape," Emmett said, shaking his head and frowning in worry as he sunk down on his bed to take his shoes off.

Next time: Jacob faces one of his toughest challenges yet.