"You and Sirius seem to be getting along much better lately," Remus commented to Serena later that same day.
The two of them were sitting outside sprawled on the ground, ostensibly doing homework. Serena looked at him out of the corner of her eye, wondering if he knew something he wasn't sharing. Remus' face remained impassive. "Actually – " here Serena lowered her voice " – I've been thinking that maybe you were right this whole time."
"I'm sure I was," Remus said. "But what, exactly, are you referring to?"
Serena punched him lightly on the shoulder. "When you said Regalus was lying to me. You were right. Sirius was always going to be a target of Bellatrix; I had nothing to do with it."
Remus knew he had to tread carefully. "Oh so you finally realized you're not, in fact, the center of the universe?"
Serena mock-glared at him. "Does this mean you'll do us all a favor and get back together with him?" Remus asked.
Serena frowned for real this time. "Remus – "
"All right, all right. I'm only thinking about myself here, you know, I have to deal with his bad moods all the time since I live with him. Although luckily I get to leave that behind for a few weeks, thanks to Christmas break starting tomorrow."
"He hasn't been in a bad mood lately," Serena protested.
"Yeah, because you're being nice to him," Remus remarked.
Just then Sirius sat down on the ground next to Serena. "What are you two talking about?" he asked.
"You," Remus answered.
He made a show of looking at his watch as he got up, wiping dirt from his legs. "Oh look at that, I'm late. See you later."
And with that, he left. Thanks a lot, Remus, Serena thought.
"What were you saying?" he asked, interrupting her thoughts.
She looked at him innocently. "That…you need a haircut?" Serena offered.
Sirius grinned, leaning over her. "You like it when I need a haircut."
Damn, how does he know about that? Serena wondered.
But she couldn't keep from smiling. "Well, we've noticed that you've put on a bit of weight," she said, reaching up and patting his stomach.
"I have not! You take that back," Sirius said indignantly.
He grabbed her hands and held them together over her head. "Never!" Serena giggled.
She started screeching with laughter when Sirius started to tickle her. "I am not getting fat!" Sirius reiterated, laughter in his eyes as he looked down at Serena.
She rolled away from him, getting to her feet, and took off running. "Then why can't you keep up with me?" she shouted over her shoulder as he also got to his feet and chased after her.
Not looking where she was going, Serena ran into someone. Still laughing, she looked up and saw that it was Henri. "Bonjour," Serena said to him. "Excusez-moi."
Henri smiled at her, rubbing a hand up and down her arm. "Je ne vous ai pas vu pendant longtemps heureux," he said. "I haven't seen you happy for a long time."
"Là beaucoup avait continue," she responded as Sirius came up to them. "There's been a lot going on."
"Ne laissez pas aller de ce qui met un sourire sur votre visage, 'Rena," he advised her. "Don't let go of what puts a smile on your face, 'Rena."
"Joyeux Noël!" Serena called after Henri as he walked away.
Still smiling, she looked at Sirius. He wasn't laughing anymore, and upon seeing the expression on his face the light went out of her eyes as well. "What's the matter, love?" she asked, the endearment slipping out of her mouth before she could stop it.
But for the first time, Sirius' gaze seemed to harden upon hearing it. "Did you call him that, too?"
"What?" Serena asked, confused.
"I don't like it when I see you talking to him," Sirius said bluntly.
Now Serena realized what this was about. Henri. "Sirius, you're being stupid – "
"Don't call me stupid," he snapped.
"Well, it's not my fault you're acting that way!" Serena said, flaring up. "Merlin's beard, Sirius, we were just talking. You could see us the whole time."
She glared at him. "It's not like we were sneaking off to a Transfiguration classroom or anything."
"Give it a rest already!" Sirius exclaimed.
She stared at him. "Give it a rest? Give it a rest?" she repeated, seething. "You broke my heart!"
"Then you know how it feels!" Sirius roared. "And then I see you with him – " he spat out the word, " – and it's like you're stomping all over the pieces that are left!"
Serena stared at him, silent. Have I really hurt him that badly? Does seeing me with Henri bother him that much?
Serena could feel an upwelling of sympathy. "Sirius – " she began, reaching out a hand to touch his arm.
But for the first time, he backed away from her. "Don't look at me like that," he bit out. "I don't need your pity."
Sirius walked away, leaving Serena standing there and staring after him. Sirius was never the one who walked away; he was never the one who flinched from her touch. It was always her who did that to him. Serena felt a panic rising. He can't just walk away from me! We were in the middle of an argument!
Pretending her anxiety was merely anger, Serena headed off in the direction Sirius had gone.
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Sirius was furious. He was furious with Serena; he was furious with Henri; but most of all, he was furious with himself. He had just thrown away weeks spent getting Serena to trust him, to want to be around him. As he reached the castle doors he heard her calling his name, but he pretended he was deaf and entered the school.
He was walking down the hallway when he heard a door slam and "Sirius Black!" reverberating down the hall.
Sirius ignored Serena, continuing to walk down the hall, when she ran up to him and grabbed his arm. "Quit walking away from me!" she said, her voice overly loud.
Other people in the hallway were starting to stare. "Shove off," Sirius replied, shaking her hand loose.
Serena's eyes flashed. She blasted open a nearby door, muttered some spell, and before Sirius knew it he was being propelled into the room. The spell released him, and Serena slammed the door shut behind them. "Sirius!" she began, turning to face him.
"What?" he snapped out.
Both breathing more heavily than was normal, they locked eyes. Serena could see the anger and hurt in Sirius' eyes, but he couldn't read her expression. "Sirius," she said again, her voice breathy.
He had heard her say his name like that many times before, and it went straight to his nether region. Unaware of this, Serena continued to speak. "I just – "
But she was cut off as Sirius stepped forward and kissed her forcefully. After a moment Serena kissed him back hungrily, pressing her body against his. He backed them up to the large teacher's desk in the front of the room, then broke the kiss and gently pushed Serena down on top of it. Serena felt a delicious thrill as Sirius loomed over her. He pushed up her robes, pulled down her underwear, and swiftly entered her. Serena cried out as he repeatedly slammed into her. "Yes," she moaned. "Harder."
She gripped the edge of the desk so she wouldn't slide right off as Sirius took her suggestion. Finally they both achieved release. After a moment Serena propped herself up on her elbow. "Back up," she told him.
Sirius took a step back, feeling guilty about what had just happened. Was he too rough? Had he hurt her? He looked at Serena's face, but she was smiling. "Take off your robe."
Wondering what she was up to, but only too happy to comply, Sirius stripped. "Now sit down," she said, nodding towards the chair behind him.
Sirius sat. Now Serena stood, and she stripped as well. Sirius' eyes traveled over every inch of her as she came towards him. She straddled him, hissing out a breath as she lowered herself over him and sheathed him inside of her. Sirius' hand reached up and pulled her face towards his, his mouth devouring hers. He broke the kiss as Serena began slowly, leisurely rocking, and began working on her neck instead. He kissed and nibbled, then would bite and use his tongue to soothe, leaving his mark on her.
Serena moaned, then began rocking faster and faster, Sirius lifting his hips to meet her, and they both came again. Breathing heavily, Serena buried her face in his shoulder. After a moment she began kissing his neck. Eventually she began to speak. "We should leave before someone finds us in here," she said into his ear.
Sirius sighed. "I know," he said, surprising her with his quick agreement.
Serena got off of him, looking around for her underwear. Sirius pulled on his robe, then glanced at his watch. "Shit!" he said. "I'm late for Quidditch practice."
He gave Serena a kiss. "I'll see you later."
Sirius paused, rubbing his hands up and down her arms. "Right?"
Serena nodded. He kissed her again, hard, then quickly left the room.
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Serena went back to the common room, finding Remus, Lily, and Rosie sitting together. "What's up with you?" Lily asked as Serena sat down next to them.
"Nothing," Serena said defensively, straightening her robes.
Lily and Remus gave her skeptical looks, but didn't say anything. "What time are you guys leaving to go home tomorrow?" Serena asked them.
Tomorrow Christmas break began. Almost everyone was going home for a few weeks. Serena, however, was not. Al hadn't written her since that one note he had sent after Lestrange and Bellatrix's attack, so Serena had assumed he didn't want her to come home. Serena knew that Sirius was also staying at school. Before, she hadn't known how she felt about that. Now, she was even more nervous. Just the two of them, together, for two whole weeks? After what had just occurred? Serena didn't know what would happen – and she didn't know what she wanted to happen.
"Train leaves at nine in the morning," Rosie answered.
Lily shifted in her seat. "Actually…I may as well tell you now."
"What?" Remus asked.
"I'm not going home."
"You're not?" Rosie asked, confused.
"Why haven't you said anything before this?" Serena added.
Lily looked uncomfortable. "My parents are going to Petunia and Vernon's new home for Christmas, and although they told me I could come, I just – I don't think I'd be welcome. It wouldn't be a very fun Christmas, anyway. So I thought I'd stay here with you and Sirius," Lily said, looking at Serena.
"But why haven't you mentioned this before?" Serena asked again.
Lily twirled strand of hair around her finger. "Well – I sort of haven't told James yet."
Remus groaned. "You haven't told James?" Rosie asked, sounding shocked. "But he would probably want to stay here with you!"
"I know," Lily said. "That's why I didn't tell him. He's an only child, and I know his parents want to see him around Christmas. I would feel terrible if he didn't go home because of me."
"He probably would have asked you to go home with him. He asked Sirius to," Remus commented.
Serena looked surprised. "Then why isn't Sirius going to the Potters' for holiday break? I know he did last Christmas."
Remus gave her a look. "Hmm, wonder why Sirius would want to stay at school this year…" he trailed off.
Serena didn't know how to feel about that. Sirius was staying at school because of her? He had decided this weeks ago, before – Serena shook her head, trying to focus on what Lily was saying.
"Mr. and Mrs. Potter are nice and all, but Christmas with my boyfriend's family? I don't know…besides, I wouldn't want to intrude on their family time. Especially when my family – I'd just rather stay at school."
Remus and Rosie were frowning, but Serena looked understanding. "Let's talk about something else," Serena suggested.
To her surprise, it was Rosie who spoke up. "All right. What would you think about me going on a date with Henri?"
Serena, Lily, and Remus all stared at her. "Henri? French Henri?" Lily asked, certain she had misheard.
"Are you only going to date Frenchmen?" Remus wanted to know.
"I think it's great!" Serena said.
"You do?" Rosie and Lily asked in unison.
"It wouldn't bother you?" Rosie added.
Serena smiled at her friend. "Of course not. I haven't dated Henri for almost two years. I didn't even realize you two had been – " here Serena wiggled her eyebrows suggestively " – talking."
"He asked me out last week, but I said I wanted to talk to you about it first," Rosie confessed.
Remus left to go pack, and Serena, Lily, and Rosie spent the next hour talking about Rosie and Henri. Rosie then also left – admitting that she and Henri were going to exchange addresses so they could write to each other over break – leaving Serena and Lily in the Gryffindor common room. "So, this is going to sound strange," Serena said to her friend after a moment. "But do you think you could somehow casually mention to Sirius that Henri and Rosie are going to start dating? And that I thought it was a good idea?"
Lily stared at Serena. "Sure," she finally said.
She didn't say anything else, just cocked a brow at her friend, and Serena sighed. "All right, all right," she said, giving in to Lily's unspoken demand. "I'll tell you what's going on. Sirius and I were getting along really well earlier today, and then we ran into Henri, and – Lily, he really can't stand Henri. I think he really believes that some part of me still has feelings for Henri. Which is stupid – and I told him he was being stupid, and then we got into this huge, gigantic fight."
"So, this will be a fun break for me," Lily interjected.
"Weeeeell," Serena said, drawing out the word.
Lily sat up straight. "Oh my gosh. What happened? Tell me right now!"
Serena was about to do just that when the portrait hole opened and Sirius, James, Madison, and the rest of the Gryffindor Quidditch team traipsed inside. "Blast," Lily muttered.
"I'll tell you later," Serena said quietly.
But not quietly enough. "Tell her what later?" Madison asked.
She, James, and Sirius looked at the two girls. Serena made sure not to look at Sirius, and just shrugged in response to Madison's query. "Whatever," Madison said.
She lay down on the couch across from Lily and Serena. "I still have to pack," she moaned, closing her eyes.
"Me too," James said.
"Remus is upstairs packing right now," Serena told them.
James sat down next to Lily, putting an arm around her. "Did you pack already?" he asked her.
Lily didn't say anything for a moment. "You know, I just remembered, I have to – go," Serena finished lamely.
She stood up, but Lily's hand shot out and grabbed her arm. "No, you already did that, remember?" Lily said.
Lily gave Serena a look that said, 'Don't leave me here', and Serena reluctantly sat back down. Madison cracked open an eye. "What's going on?" she asked them.
"I didn't pack," Lily said, answering James' earlier question. "I don't need to. I'm staying here over break."
Madison jumped to her feet. "You know, I should really get a start on my packing. See you!"
She practically ran upstairs. Serena and Sirius looked at each other, wishing they could leave as well, but as Lily had obviously wanted Serena to stay, Sirius felt he should stay as well out of some sort of loyalty to James. "And how long have you known about this?" James asked Lily.
He had stood up, and was now looking down at her. Lily got to her feet as well. "Uh – a week or…three…but James – "
Her explanation was cut off as James yelled, "Three weeks? And you've just been lying to me about it ever since then?"
"I haven't lied, I just didn't correct your assumption – "
"Oh, right, well, that's a whole different story then," James said sarcastically.
He turned his glare to Serena. "And how long have you known about this?"
Sirius frowned at his friend's tone. "About two hours," Serena answered coolly.
"Don't talk to her like that," Lily snapped.
"Well excuuuuse me for being a little annoyed that my best friend and now my girlfriend are choosing to spend Christmas here with her – " James jerked his head towards Serena " – instead of with me. And might I add, I have never treated either of you like crap."
"James," Sirius said warningly, glancing at Serena.
Despite her anger at James' words, Serena also felt almost guilty. James was right, after all. He was always there for Lily and for Sirius; she wasn't. "Quit being such a prat," Lily was saying while those thoughts were going through Serena's head. "I didn't choose Serena over you; I'm not welcome home with my own family for Christmas. That's why I'm staying here."
"You could have come home with me," James said, his tone turning petulant. "You know I would have asked you."
"I know," Lily said, her voice soothing. "But I – " she looked at Serena for support, but Serena didn't know how she could help.
After all, James was clearly not going to appreciate anything Serena had to say. So Serena just nodded at her friend encouragingly. Lily sighed. "James, I just – it's your family time," she finally said. "I know you would have felt like you had to invite me home, and I didn't want to intrude."
"Intrude," James repeated.
Serena saw him look at Sirius, who raised his eyebrows. James then looked back at Lily. "I guess I'll see you after holiday, then," he said stiffly, and walked towards the portrait hole.
To Serena's surprise, Lily didn't go after him. She sat down next to Serena again. "I knew he'd be mad," Lily said glumly.
Serena put an arm around her friend. "Sorry."
Lily looked at Serena. "I'm sorry too. For what James said."
Lily glanced at Sirius, and a look passed between them. "It's fine," Serena said, trying to sound casual.
She gave Lily's shoulders a squeeze, then got up. "I'll be back in a few minutes," she said.
Sirius' eyes followed her as she went upstairs to the boys' dormitory. What is she doing? he wondered.
His thoughts were interrupted when Lily cleared her throat. He looked away from Serena's retreating form to find Lily looking at him as if she wanted to say something. "What?" he asked her.
"I just wanted to tell you something."
"What?" Sirius repeated.
"I was sitting here with Serena, Rosie, and Remus earlier, and guess what I learned?"
Tired of sounding like a broken record, Sirius didn't ask her 'what?' again, but rather stayed silent so that Lily would continue. "Rosie and Henri like each other."
"Rosie and Henri?" Sirius echoed.
Lily nodded. "Yeah. Apparently Henri asked her out last week, but – get this – Rosie wanted to wait to ask Serena's permission. Isn't that funny?"
Sirius looked nonplussed. "Why is it funny?" he asked.
"Because! Rosie actually thought Serena would care," Lily said with a laugh. "Obviously she told Rosie she didn't."
"Yeah," Sirius said, forcing a laugh.
Serena didn't even care, he thought, replaying Lily's words in his mind. She doesn't care if one of her friends dates Henri. That has to mean something. Maybe she really does mean it when she says she doesn't have any feelings for him anymore.
Sirius realized that Serena was right – he had been stupid. He had been thinking that just because Serena had slept with Henri, Serena and Henri's relationship had been on the same level as his and Serena's. Which is obviously not true. He knew that Serena was normally not a jealous or possessive person, but he also knew with one hundred percent certainty that she would never give anyone permission to date him.
"So you're going to be around for break, huh," Sirius said to Lily.
She nodded. "Just you, me, and Serena."
"What's the real reason you didn't tell James before?" Sirius asked.
Lily hesitated. "It's partly what I said before," she replied. "You of all people should understand where I'm coming from here. The holidays with his parents? That's so…so…grown-up," was the word she finally settled for.
"I guess," Sirius said doubtfully. "But it's you and James we're talking about here. You guys love that couple stuff."
Lily rolled her eyes. "Whatever."
She paused. "And being with around a family will just remind me that my own doesn't want me around. Besides, don't you think that – I know his parents like me, but James is their only child. They don't need me there for Christmas."
Sirius shrugged. "The Potters are used to people intruding on their family time. It's just that it's usually me."
Lily touched his arm. "Sirius, I didn't mean it like that. I'm sure they don't think of you that way."
"You should talk to James before he leaves," Sirius said, changing the subject.
Lily sighed. "I know. But you know he just needs time to cool off."
"Yeah. Fun train ride home for Remus and Peter tomorrow."
Lily smiled wanly. "Let's just say that I won't be surprised if Remus doesn't send me a Christmas present."
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"Are you done packing yet," Serena whined upon entering the boys' dorm.
"I packed last night," Remus said from his bed.
He was lying there reading a magazine. "Then why'd you leave?" Serena asked, closing the door behind her and sitting on Sirius' bed, facing Remus.
"This may surprise you, but I'm not a girl. I don't need to be a part of those conversations."
"Fine," Serena pouted.
"What are you doing up here, anyways?"
"Came looking for you," Serena said.
She noticed him looking somewhere around her chin. "What?" she asked.
"You have got the makings of a really noticeable hickey going on," Remus told her. "Please tell me it was Sirius so I don't have to stop him from killing someone."
Serena blushed a bit, trying to pull up her collar. "Uh…yeah," Serena admitted.
"How come you didn't say anything before?" Remus asked.
"Well I mean it just happened, and – I thought you didn't want in on the girl talk? I don't need to explain myself to you," she said.
Remus grinned. "Yeah, you don't have to. But wasn't it you that just earlier today was telling me you wouldn't be getting back together with him? Even though you've been sleeping in here with him every night?"
Serena sat up straight. "What?" she yelped. "How do you know about that?"
Remus looked sheepish. "When it gets close to that time – the uh, the full moon, I mean – my senses are sort of…heightened. And I'm a light sleeper anyway."
Serena laid back down. "Oh. Sorry."
"'S okay."
There was silence for a moment, and then Serena said, "Does anyone else – "
"No, I didn't tell anyone," Remus said before she could finish asking the question.
Serena flipped over so she was lying on her stomach and could see Remus. "So, Lily just told James she's staying here, James got pissed and blamed me, and then he stormed off. He'll probably be bitching all the way home tomorrow. So have fun with that."
"My friends are such girls," Remus said before he could stop himself.
Serena propped herself up on her elbows, looking at Remus, then burst out laughing. Remus caught her eye, then started laughing as well. "What's so funny?" Sirius asked, walking in to find Remus sitting in his bed laughing and Serena rolling around giggling hysterically in Sirius' bed.
"Nothing," Serena choked out.
At her words Sirius frowned a bit, not liking being left out of the loop. Seeing his frown, Remus and Serena started laughing harder. Sirius walked over to Serena. "You're taking up too much room," Sirius complained to her as he sat down on his bed, putting a hand on her back.
Serena sat up, her laughter subsiding a bit. "Did you know Remus has known this whole time?"
"Known what?" Sirius asked, rubbing the ends of her hair between his fingertips.
"I've heard you guys come in every night," Remus spoke up.
"Oh. Sorry," Sirius said, not sounding repentant at all.
Remus went back to reading his magazine. "How come you left?" Sirius asked Serena, running the front of his hand lightly up and down her back.
She shrugged. "I figured you and Lily wanted to talk about James."
Sirius looked at her seriously. "Listen, Serena, about what he said to you – "
"Let's not get into it," she said.
Remus looked at them quizzically, but neither Sirius nor Serena elaborated on what James had said before. "It's time for dinner," Sirius said instead, standing and pulling Serena up by the hand.
The three of them went downstairs. Not finding any of their friends in the common room, they assumed the others had already gone to dinner and made their way to the dining hall. But they were stopped in a hallway by Professor McGonagall. "Ashby. Lupin. Professor Dumbledore would like to speak with you."
Serena and Remus exchanged confused glances. What was going on? Serena felt a frisson of fear. Had something happened to Al?
Catching sight of the expression of Serena's face – and knowing that she was worried about her brother – Sirius made a move as if to go with them, but McGonagall put a hand on his shoulder. "Just Ashby and Lupin, Mr. Black," she said to him.
She increased the pressure on his shoulder, guiding him towards the dining hall. Serena and Remus headed for Dumbledore's office. "What's this about, do you think?" Serena asked.
Remus gave her a reassuring look. "I'm sure it's nothing. Don't worry," he said.
Serena looked into his calm eyes and felt herself relax a bit. Upon reaching Dumbledore's office, Remus swept out a hand. "Ladies first," he said, prepared to wait in the small outer room.
Serena flashed him a smile, then went inside. To her surprise, she found not only Dumbledore in the office but also her uncle. "Uncle?" she asked. "What are you doing here?"