Orys slept peacefully in his cot and his mother also slept curled up in her bed, her long light hair, but curly like her son's, spread over the pillow. That night Meria's sleep had been peaceful, a rarity for her who was used to having terrible nightmares. It was as if they were haunting her. The baby in the cradle moved his little legs, opened and closed his little right hand, the one that had one finger plus and after making little moan-like noises he opened his blue eyes and seemed to stare at the ceiling above his head for a few minutes before he began to cry waking his mother.
"Orys what is it baby?" The young woman asked, opening her eyes and turning towards the cot. The window curtains were closed; however, some sunlight filtered through the cracks, and she guessed it must be morning by now. Meria got out of bed and walked over to the cradle. Renly hadn't slept with her for months because they felt that since they had a child, there was no longer any need to keep up appearances; it was quite common for married couples to no longer sleep together once the main purpose of those nights spent together had been achieved and some would barely speak to each other. At least she and Renly got along well together and a bond of friendship and even complicity had been formed, though not the kind one might have expected between two spouses. She even got along well with her husband's lover and in some ways felt that theirs was a better and happier marriage than theirs. Surely, theirs was a more successful union than that of the king and queen.
Orys was not hungry, he had eaten a few hours earlier, instead he was dirty. Another noblewoman in Lannister's place would have appointed a servant, probably a wet nurse, to clean her son, but she was not like other mothers and tried to attend to her son's every need, even if she did not refuse a hand when offered. Her husband approved of her idea to breastfeed her son personally, even though Renly had asked her to get a nurse to help her anyway, but his wife had reminded him that her mother had breastfed her and that she intended to do the same and that she preferred to take care of her son herself, of course if she realized she couldn't do it alone she would get a nurse, but the woman in question would only be a support and would not take care of her son for her.
After breakfast, Orys too became hungry, and his mother untied the laces of the dress she had just put on with Lily's help and uncovered her breasts. As soon as she had brought the baby close to her breast, she began to suck greedily. Shortly afterward, there was a knock at the door.
"Go and see who it is." She addressed the servant girl. Silently, Lily went to the door and opened it.
"Good morning, Your Grace." Said the servant in a serious tone after seeing who had knocked. Cersei entered the room without a word, an arrogant and rude attitude that did not surprise her niece. Cersei Lannister was the Queen Consort and as such she thought she did not have to ask permission before entering a room. An expression of pure disapproval appeared on the lioness's face when she saw her niece, another thing that did not surprise Meria.
"Good morning, Queen Cersei." She greeted her in a mock cordial tone. When she was a child, she had sometimes tried to call her father's sister's aunt so badly that the woman had quickly let her know that it bothered her. In fact, she almost seemed to insult her when she called her that way, and the girl had quickly realized that if she would rather not upset her she shouldn't.
"Noble women don't breastfeed their children, but after all you are a bastard and I suppose I shouldn't be surprised." She commented, staring at her as if she were doing something untoward, and that was probably the case for her. The maiden did not flinch.
"You may be right, I mean we bastards may indeed have other habits and customs considering my mother nursed me, and she too was a bastard." She replied quietly, determined not to feel guilty just because she wanted to feed her child herself.
"You are the shame of my family." She said with contempt as she approached.
"You meant: our family. We are both Lannisters." She corrected her and tried hard not to smile smugly at the contrite expression that appeared on the older woman's face upon hearing those words. Meria lowered her gaze and stared at the small face of her son, who was greedily sucking her milk. Once, driven by curiosity, she had wet her finger with some of her milk and put it in her mouth and found it perfect, different from any milk she remembered ever drinking.
"I advise you to be careful. The Red Keep and King's Landing can be a dangerous place for a baby." She observed, staring at the infant with her emerald eyes. The other gasped upon hearing those words and clutched the infant tighter to her, convinced that the queen was threatening her son.
"I thank you for the warning, though you did not need to remind me how dangerous it can be to live here, especially for children." She replied in a firm voice, hoping her aunt would catch her reference to her cousins. The older woman intertwined the fingers of her hands at belly height.
"Then you also know to be careful what you say and do. The consequences of your actions could be terrible if you are not careful." She said impassively. The other tried hard not to appear upset by her words.
"Yes, you are right because the Lannisters are not the only ones who always pay their debts." She retorted, looking Cersei straight in the eye, hoping she would also catch the veiled threat that was hidden behind her words. After all, she and the queen were more alike than it might have seemed because they both made veiled threats and would move sea and mountains to protect their respective pets and the people they love in general.
"Well, I came to check on you and the little one." She said, She had pronounced the word little as if it were a derogatory word.
"We thank you for the visit. You were very kind." She said with a fake smile. Cersei looked at her in silence, then said goodbye and left. The visit had been brief and yet, it had seemed to the seventeen-year-old girl that it had lasted an eternity.
"Let's start the morning off right." Meria commented after her aunt had left the room. Her friend approached the table.
"Aren't you afraid she might hurt you or have your child?" She asked in a nervous tone. The other did not flinch and pushed Orys, who had finished eating, away from her breast.
"Yes, she is the Queen of the Seven Kingdoms, of course I am afraid of her, but I also know that she cannot carry out her threats because if she hurts me or my son, then she will have to deal with my father, and she knows that too." She replied. Actually, she wasn't entirely sure that fear of Jaime's reaction would stop Cersei, so it was important anyway that she was careful about what she did or said because if it would really upset her…
"Don't wake a sleeping dog," said my grandmother, or rather the lioness in this case." Said her friend in a warning tone. The blonde fixed her dress by covering her chest after placing her son in her friend's arms, then stood up and retrieved the infant from the servant's arms.
"I will take Orys to visit his cousins. You, please take to the laundresses the clothes to be washed." She said kindly and then left the room.
Princess Myrcella and Prince Tommen were in the nursery: the girl was playing with a doll, while the prince was building a tower using coloured wooden cubes. The baby was sitting on the floor while her sister was sitting on a chair at the table. When Meria entered the room two pairs of eyes, three counting that of Septa who was taking care of her cousins and who was embroidering sitting by the window, stared at her.
"Orys!" Myrcella exclaimed before rushing towards them. Meria lowered herself so that she could see the infant, and the princess stared at the child with her green eyes that were so similar to her mother's and also to Jaime's.
"Lady Meria, it is a pleasure to see you back at court. How are you?" Septa asked as she approached. Her head was covered by a veil, the same one that seemed to unite all women who had decided to dedicate their lives to the Faith.
"Well, thank you." Answered the Lady of Storm's End, Tommen had also approached and was staring at the infant with a curious expression.
"He's cute, but he also looks so small." He said.
"You were small for his age, too." His cousin replied, stroking his cheek.
"Yes, all of us were once just babies, then we grew up and became big. Little Orys, just like you, is destined to grow up under the blessing and gaze of the Seven." Affirmed the religion in a solemn tone. "Tell me, has he already been anointed with the seven oils?" She asked, "Yes, he was anointed with the seven oils a few days after I recovered from childbirth." She replied, recalling the Septo of Storm's End holding the baby while anointing his head with seven different oils, as was the tradition in their religion.
"I am sure the gods have blessed him, and he will have a long and happy life, and so will you." Septa replied. "And also that you will have other sons and daughters as well." She continued. The seventeen-year-old did not reply, instead her lips curved into a smile, and she tried to appear serene and that the last sentence had not upset her.
I am sorry Lady Meria however I fear you will not be able to have any more children, I am truly sorry. The Maester's words echoed in her head. He had explained to her that even if she did not die because of the great loss of blood during childbirth, she would not have any more children. The news had shocked her because it was one thing to know that she would probably never have children again because her husband was unable to sleep with her another to be absolutely certain.
"Meria, Meria then may I hold Orys?" The princess' insistent voice asked, distracting her from her sad thoughts. She tried not to think about it and to concentrate on Orys and also to convince herself that even if she would not have any more children, she was still lucky, and yet she just could not.
"Yes, Myrcella of course." She replied. She made the child sit on a chair and then gently placed her cousin in her arms. Myrcella held the infant tightly to her. She appeared a little awkward, at the same time she was very tender to her cousin.
"One day, I too will have a child, won't I?" She asked hopefully, staring at Meria with her clear eyes.
"Yes, if that is what you wish." She replied, stroking her cheek.
"You shall have as many children as you wish, Princess." Said the Septa. "And that you must because it will be your duty to marry, obey and give children to the husband your parents have chosen for you." She continued. The smile faded from the face of the child, who seemed, rightly, disturbed by the woman's words.
"I am sure the king and queen will choose you as a good husband, a man who will keep you well, and in time you will fall in love." Said Meria in an encouraging tone in an attempt to ease the tension that had arisen, however the child did not seem convinced by her words at all.
"My parents do not have a happy marriage." She commented doubtfully and then lowered her gaze to stare at the small face of the infant she was holding in her arms. Meria remained silent and did not reply because she did not know what to say and could not help feeling guilty at the thought that she had slept with Myrcella and Tommen's father.
A few hours later, she was in the castle grounds, sitting in the grass in the shade of a tree. Not alone with her were her husband, Orys and Loras. Orys was lying in the grass and his father was staring at him, his eyes full of love. Referring to the blessing that traditionally all newborns received after birth.
"He has your eyes." Meria commented, staring at her son. Her remark was directed at Renly and Loras must have realised it too because he intervened.
"But he has simply blue eyes while Renly's are blue, but they are also green, they change depending on what he wears or the light." He asserted.
"In my opinion, Meria is right." Renly replied without looking away from the infant and brushing one of his cheeks with the tip of a finger.
"We have visitors." Said Loras. The couple looked away from the baby and stared at the king walking towards them. The blonde restrained the impulse to grab her son and pull him to her in a protective gesture.
"King Robert." Renly exclaimed with a smile of mock glee as the older brother walked towards them.
"I have come to see my first nephew. The first of many more, I hope." He said seriously. Meria had to bite her tongue to restrain herself from answering her brother-in-law as she really wanted to, namely by telling him that there would be no more nephews, and not because she could no longer have children, but because neither today nor ever would she share a bed with him again. Once had been more than enough in more ways than one.
"Your first grandson is enjoying this beautiful day." The lady replied, smiling tenderly at her son and scratching his tummy. The newborn smiled.
"Well, I am delighted to see that my grandson seems to be growing in good health, and I am sure he will grow into a strong and robust man as befits a true Baratheon." Commented the ruler. "And it is a pleasure to see that he at least seems to have inherited the typical Baratheon appearance, except for the olive skin." He went on, repeating the same words Lord Stannis, his other brother, had spoken when he had first seen the little one. Indeed, Joffrey and his brothers looked much more like Lannisters than Baratheons.
"Yes, a small deer with olive skin." Meria replied.
"I think it's fairer to say fur." Renly corrected her in a gentle tone, and she nodded her head in assent.
"Well, I will leave you." Said the ruler before walking away. He had not even dignified Loras with a glance, and the blonde felt pity for the Flower Knight who was the true love of Robert's younger brother.
"Would you like to spend some time alone with Orys?" She proposed with a small smile, turning to her husband and his lover. She stood upright before the two had time to reply. "Renly pointed out that I spent two months alone with Orys and expressed a desire to make up for lost time, and I think it is time for the little one to meet Uncle Loras." She commented, cleaning the skirt of her dress of the blades of grass that had stuck to it.
"Alright." Agreed her husband. Loras did not seem entirely convinced, so she took the infant and placed it in his arms. The handsome knight looked awkward for a moment as he held the child in his arms.
"Take care." She said before walking away and leaving her husband and lover to take care of Orys.
Orys preferred his mother to his father. It was as if in his heart duo the child understood how things really were, but Renly was determined to win his son's heart because regardless of what blood and people might say: Orys was his son. He might not have conceived him, but he was his son. He was the one who had held him in his arms when he was a few days old, and it was still him he would one day learn to call father and after all, they shared the same blood, although he was actually his nephew and not his son.
A servant at Storm's End had told him that it was normal for newborns to be more attached to their mothers than their fathers because they knew where their milk came from, and yet the lord could not help but feel sorry for the fact that his son seemed to prefer being in his mother's arms rather than in his own and that when he cried for Meria it seemed easier to soothe him.
He wished that either he or Loras had been born to a woman and that Orys had been their son, perhaps that was fair to Meria, but wouldn't things have been much easier then? At least he would have been able to marry the person he loved.
He missed living in Storm's End, just him and Loras and being able to live their love with serenity in a place full of loyal servants who, although they knew their secrets and some of them disapproved, would never betray their lord. Instead, in the capital they had to be prudent not to spend too much time together, especially now that he was married, and sporadically, he wondered if he was not a horrible person when he wished that his wife did not exist or at least that he had not been forced to marry her, but then he remembered that in that case he would never know the joys of fatherhood and then those desires would quickly fade away, though not entirely.
The news that Lord Arryn had suddenly fallen ill took him completely surprised, for although Jon was no longer a man in the prime of life, he was in excellent health and at first, like most of the Red Keep's inhabitants, he thought that the man would recover, but a few days later Lord Arryn died in his bed.
"You know, fate may have handed you a great opportunity on a silver platter." Commented Loras. They had recently finished making love and Loras was lying by his side, keeping one hand resting on his chest and staring at him with her liquid gold eyes.
"What do you mean?" He asked confused.
"Your sibling spawned a bastard with your wife, you could take advantage of that…. I mean, the kingdom needs a new The Hand now that Jon Arryn is dead." He asserted with a look that seemed to say more than a thousand words.
"Don't call him that." He exclaimed annoyed. He knew he had only told the truth that the child had been conceived out of wedlock and was consequently a bastard, no matter if people believed otherwise. "Besides, he is my son, not Robert's and I have no intention of using my wife's sacrifice against her and humiliating her." He asserted. He would not be the one to reveal to his brother that he had become a father for what could only be called the twentieth time, considering his brother and his constant betrayals.
"Sorry, you're right, I shouldn't have called him that, but it's also true that you have a weapon, and you can use it against him. You are his sibling, and you deserve that position in the Small Council." He replied. Renly looked away and stared at the ceiling as his lover stroked his bare chest.
"I believe Robert has already decided to propose the position to his dear childhood friend Lord Stark." He said, communicating a rumour that had begun to circulate through the corridors of the Red Keep within hours of Arryn's death. Robert and Eddard had been friends for many years since they had both been sent to the Vale and placed in the care of Jon Arryn, with whom they had formed a strong bond and over time had become a second father to them. Renly hated to admit it, but there were times when he thought Robert loved Ned more and considered him more his sibling than his actual siblings.
"And does that seem fair to you? You are his sibling and not that Nordic Lord." He exclaimed. He was right, it was not fair for Robert to appoint the Stark his Hand when he had two siblings because after all, he would have preferred Stannis to be appointed rather than Eddard.
"He might not accept. Lord Stark has left the North very few times since the end of the war, and he might refuse the position to stay in his cold, inhospitable North."
"It is hard to say no to a king." Rebutted the other. A short silence followed, then Loras changed the subject. "Did you show Robert the portrait of my sister?" He asked. Loras and his family wanted Margaery to take Cersei's place as queen, and Loras had asked Renly to show his brother the portrait of his beautiful young sister.
"No, I didn't show it to him, and then considering that the crown and kingdom run on Lannister gold, I'm uncertain if it would be a good idea for Robert to call off his marriage." And he wasn't even sure how his wife would take it if her aunt was disowned, Meria would probably worry about the future of her younger cousins because the children Margaery might have with Robert might one day pose a threat to them and Renly wasn't even entirely sure what would become of his nephews and if Robert disinherited them? "Not to mention that my brother is such a fickle person and your sister could end up with her reputation ruined and even pregnant with yet another bastard." He continued because even if Margaery had managed to get into the sovereign's good graces it was possible that she would become just his umpteenth lover, and how long would it be before the king got fed up with her? Knowing him little.
"You are right, but my sister is as intelligent as she is beautiful, and she wants to be queen, not just the lover. She is an ambitious and determined woman." He replied.
"I'll show Robert the portrait of Margaery, and then we'll see." He agreed, although he was not entirely convinced.
A few days later, Robert announced his intention to go to the North. He did not express aloud his intention to ask Eddard to be his new The Hand, yet everyone seemed to have understood; it was obvious from the Queen's behaviour that she would have preferred someone from her family to hold that position had even proposed the name of her twin.
Meria would have liked to stay in the South, but Cersei insisted that her niece come to the North. Meria suspected that her aunt wanted her to suffer just as she was suffering, and would take out her frustrations from the journey on her. Orys seemed too young to face such a journey, not to mention that the North was such a cold place, so with death in her heart she sought a wet nurse and left him in the South. The wet nurse advised her herbs to make the milk go away naturally and recommended that she regularly help the liquid to come out so that he would not be sick. The problem was that she also warned her that there was a risk that by going so long without breastfeeding and taking the herbs for a long time there was a risk that she would no longer be able to breastfeed, however for the sake of her son it was a price the young woman was willing to pay even if reluctantly.
"Try to enjoy yourself, but beware of the men from the North, I would never want one to steal your heart. Be careful, but also enjoy this trip." Said Renly when the time came for them to say goodbye, and she understood the hidden meaning behind those words: her husband was giving her permission to have a lover, indeed he was encouraging her to have one; however, he also begged her to be careful.